The Simpler Life

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THE S IMPLER L IFE by Sam Spurlin Living 8 Essentials To Practice Everyday

description

A 2 chapter preview of my e-book, Living the Simpler Life.

Transcript of The Simpler Life

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t h e S i m p l e r l i f e

by Sam Spurlin

Living8 Essentials To Practice Everyday

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DeDicateD to

All the readers of The Simpler Life. Your support is what encourages me to simplify my life everyday. I get to spend my time doing what I love because of you.

Thank you so much.

Design by Upcycled Love z

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What You’re About to ReadWhere I’m Coming From (Introduction) 4

Essentials:

1 Accurate Self-Knowledge 7

2 Purging the Unnecessary 19

3 The Willingness to Say “No” 31

4 A Focus on Conscious Consumption 41

5 Cultivating Patience 49

6 Mindfulness 58

7 A Desire for Less 70

8 An Attitude of Gratitude 78

Simplicity a Journey, Not an Event 89

Resources 90

Credits and Thank You’s 92

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W H E R E I ’ M

C O M I N G F R O M

In a world of infinite information and constant

stimulation, it can be easy to float through life instead of

piloting it in the direction I want. Cutting through the

discord and evaluating what really matters will create a

simpler life – a life that lets me decide where my time

and attention will be spent without shutting myself away

from the world.

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We live in fast and exciting times. Modern technology

makes possible that which couldn't have even been

dreamed twenty years ago. Living a simpler life doesn’t

mean that I have to give up the amenities of the 21st

century. I don’t have to become a monk (although I can). I

don’t have to throw away my T.V. and turn off the internet

(but some choose to do so). Living a simpler life can be

done in many ways but the basic principles, the essentials,

remain the same.

A beautiful aspect of the simpler life is that it means

something different to each person. For some, it may be

similar to Thoreau’s experience at Walden Pond – limited

technology and surrounded by nature. However, for most

of us it's unreasonable to strive for that level of asceticism

when our lives, jobs, and families are all demanding our

attention. Instead, I can strive to simplify my life to focus on

what I truly value. For Thoreau, that meant living with

sparse possessions in a cabin he built for himself. For the

busy professional it may mean figuring out a way to finish

the day’s work early so she can spend time with her family.

Or write the next great novel. Or read a book. The key is

that living the simpler life is different for every person.

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Through my own experience and the observation of those

around me, I have devised the following list of 8 simplicity

essentials.

1 Accurate Self-Knowledge

2 Purging the Unnecessary

3 The Willingness to Say “No”

4 A Focus on Conscious Consumption

5 Cultivating Patience

6 Mindfulness

7 A Desire For Less

8 An Attitude of Gratitude

I hope that my description, advice, and personal

experiences within each of these chapters will help you

develop the same concepts in your own life. I wrote this

ebook from the position of a student who wishes to

continue learning. I am no expert and I don't lead a

perfectly simple life. Writing this ebook has taught me that

there is no final destination, only a movement toward

progress. Clarifying my thoughts on simplicity through

writing has been a huge form of progress for me and I hope

reading it will help you proceed in the same direction.

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A c c u r A t e S e l f - K n o w l e d g e

Essential One:

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The decision to live a simpler life can be difficult at first.

Many of the messages we're bombarded with everyday

oppose the simplicity movement. We're told that

physical possessions are a manifestation of our personal

success: that bigger is better and that we are entitled to

more. Eschewing this for a simpler life can be the

beginning of a very personal and lonely road. Knowing

yourself, or self-knowledge, is the simplicity essential

that will guide you through this journey. It helps you

develop your reasons for simplifying, the methods you

utilize, and guides you on your unique voyage toward a

simpler life.

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What I am calling self-knowledge can be defined in many

different ways. For my purposes I consider it in-depth

knowledge and understanding of yourself. This includes

knowing what does and doesn't motivate you, what you are

and aren't good at, and what your passions are. Each of

these categories is extremely personal and unique. What

motivates me may not motivate you and I guarantee my

passions are very different from yours. Our different

approaches to the same problems are what colors our

simplicity experiences very differently and makes writing

simplicity advice a potentially risky endeavor (I'm willing to

try though!).

Self-knowledge is one of the essentials of simplicity

because it drives the underlying reason for simplifying. My

reason for simplifying is to allow me to focus on living my

life aligned with my values. I require the self-knowledge of

knowing what my values are before I can do anything that

will supposedly simplify my life. It is the most basic and

fundamental step.

Secondly, accurate self-knowledge allows you to choose

actions and projects that truly benefit you. My simpler life

will not look like your simpler life, and vice-versa. Joshua

Becker, author of Simplify, calls this "rational minimalism."

Many men go !shing all of their lives without knowing that it is not !sh they are after.Henry David Thoreau

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You have to decide what actions will truly simplify your life

and not worry about what others are doing. For me, getting

rid of my car would drastically NOT simplify my life; I do

not live in an area where it's feasible for me to do so.

However, for Tammy Strobel, author of Simply Car Free,

getting rid of her car is a key component toward her

simpler life. Anything you do to remove distraction and re-

focus your attention and energy on your values will lead to

a simpler life. Self-knowledge is the vital skill that will help

you do that.

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Hopefully I have convinced you by now that developing

your self-knowledge is a worthwhile endeavor. Luckily, this

is not an ability that you are or aren't born with; it must be

developed. The following is a brief list of ideas that have

helped develop my self-knowledge or are things that I am

currently doing to clarify my understanding of myself.

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Make Progress Now!

Take an online personality test: I'm leery

of online personality tests but I do think

they can be useful. If you answer the

questions truthfully and don't try to guide

the test toward a particular outcome, I

think interesting insights can be made. At

the very least, it might open your eyes to

where your strengths and weaknesses lie.

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Re"ecting on passions

Your passions are going to be derived from your values.

Taking the time to sit down and figure out what it is that

you really and truly care about at the most basic level will

go a long way toward developing your self-knowledge.

What do you spend most of your time on? During what

activities do you find yourself getting "lost"? If money was

not a concern, what would you spend most of your time

doing? These questions will help shed light on your

passions. If you are honest with yourself you might be

surprised with what you discover. I am a teacher by

training, but once I allowed myself to define my passion as

"helping people" and not "being a school teacher," I

became aware of a multitude of different ways to fulfill it,

including this ebook.

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Assessing your weaknesses/strengths and minimizing/maximizing

their impact

There are two schools of thought when it comes to

strengths and weaknesses. Some people say that you

should focus your self-improvement efforts on your

weaknesses in order to become more "well-rounded." The

other approach is to accept your weaknesses for what they

are to minimize their impact while focusing on improving

strengths instead. I am more inclined to take the latter

approach. I believe in improving weaknesses enough that

they do not completely handicap you and concentrating

the majority of attention and focus on making your

strengths truly world class. Focusing on weaknesses will

make you mediocre at best. Focusing on strengths will

make you stand out and be noticed.

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Knowing your strengths and weaknesses will make

everything you do much more effective. Do you have a

group project that requires a leader? Do you know that is a

role you enjoy and in which you thrive? Step up and be

that leader! Are you in the same situation but know that

you are a much more effective worker if you don't have to

be the leader? Take that role and dominate in it! Putting

more effort into situations where you are more likely to

have success is the logical thing to do. Your self-knowledge

will make those situations obvious.

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Asking others

If you aren't sure about your strengths and weaknesses, try

asking other people. Starting with the people closest to

you, ask them to help you figure out what you are and

aren't good at. If you interact with them on a regular basis

I'm sure they have plenty of feedback. It won't be hard to

get them to talk about your strengths, however, the greatest

possibility for true improvement in self-knowledge is by

discussing weaknesses. Identifying but not necessarily

focusing on improving your weaknesses is a great way to

tap into your self-knowledge. It's your responsibility to

approach the conversation in such a way as to make your

conversation partner comfortable enough to share what

they think your weaknesses are. How can you send your

strengths into overdrive while minimizing the impact of

your weaknesses?

Developing self-knowledge is a never ending process. You

never stop growing so why would the quest to know

yourself end? I firmly believe that learning about yourself is

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one of the most important processes to living a simpler life.

This will always happen to a certain extent regardless of

your intentions. However, once you make up your mind to

actively improve self-knowledge, the rate you start learning

about yourself grows exponentially.

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Make Progress Now!

Delegate something: I'm sure you have plenty of items that are on your to-do list that you aren't

particularly good at. Chances are, it might even be something that has been festering on your list for a while

because you are resistant to doing it.

I'm a terrible editor so whenever I get a chance I try to delegate that to somebody else. My girlfriend is

usually up to the challenge. Your job is to find one item on your to-do list that you aren't very good at doing

and delegate it to somebody else.

There is a difference between delegating and avoiding the work you're supposed to be doing, however.

Work that distracts you from your passion or doesn't align with your values is what you should be looking to

delegate. Not only will you be focusing on your strengths by removing a task you are not well-suited for,

hopefully you will be helping somebody focus on their own strengths through the work you give them.

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I want to leave you with the idea that the development of

self-knowledge and the process toward living a simpler life

are inseparable. As you improve self-knowledge it becomes

easier to take action toward a simpler life. As your life

becomes simpler and you spend more of your time and

attention focused on your passions and values, your self-

knowledge will grow at an even faster rate. The key is to

open your mind to the possibility of understanding itself

better and then taking steps to make it happen. A simpler

life is passion and values laid bare. Tapping into your self-

knowledge will help you figure out what you will be

sharing with the world. It is the crucial first step on your

journey.

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Ninety percent of the world’s woe comes from

people not knowing themselves, their abilities,

their frailties, and even their real virtues.

Most of us go almost all the way through life as complete strangers to

ourselves.

SYDNEY J. HARRIS

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p u r g i n g t h e u n n e c e S S A r y

Essential Two:

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Simplification is the process of expelling everything that

isn't central to your values in favor of what is. Depending

on the amount of stuff you own and the state of your

mind, this step could vary in difficulty and in time to

achieve. When I first started thinking about living a

simpler life, I had a ridiculous amount of things to purge.

I had to reduce my wardrobe from its absurd state. I had

to get rid of the absolute mess that had become my book

collection. Nothing was safe from my probing eyes. I

also had to declutter my mind because it was filled with

partially completed projects, worries, regrets, and other

annoyances. This can be a tough principle to adapt on

both levels but removing the superfluous from your

surroundings and your mind has an amazing, energizing

affect on the rest of your life

Your physical environment is probably the area that

could most obviously benefit from a good purge. It

finally seems after decades of conspicuous consumption

(at least in America), some people are beginning to see

the benefit of having less. However, years of Westernized

lifestyle has probably left your living space a cluttered

mess. Physical decluttering, or purging, is the act of

identifying the clutter in your life and removing it. This is

simple in theory and usually much less so in practice.

Before tackling this project you must be sure that your

motivation is sound. It will do you no good to spend time

decluttering your house if the mindset that led to its current

state is not addressed. Why do you want to remove the

clutter from your life? When I first began this process I

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realized that the tranquility and serenity of a decluttered

room was a wonderful feeling. I loved walking into a room

that had been decluttered so I decided to try to create that

feeling throughout my entire life. It can be difficult to

appreciate just how much stress and subconscious thought

your mess is causing until it's gone. For others, motivation

may be financial. Decluttering your home will result in all

sorts of items you can sell on eBay, Craigslist or at a garage

sale. Your motivation can be almost anything as long as it

excites you for the task ahead.

If you're interested in purging an area of your home I

recommend following this rough guide:

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Determine what you’re going to do

with the clutter.

Get empty garbage bags, boxes and labeling

supplies ready. Do the necessary research to figure

out where you can take your clutter once you've

identified it. Where is the closest thrift store that will

accept clothing donations? Where is the closest

recycling center that will take your old electronics

equipment?

Often, the biggest impediment to getting started on a

decluttering project is identifying what you will do

with the junk afterward. I recommend getting an

empty garbage bag and three boxes. The purpose of

the bag is obvious, but each of the boxes has a very

important role. Label one "Donate," one "Sell," and

the last one "I'm Not Sure." Having these boxes on

hand and ready to go will make the actual purging

process much easier. If you take care of the legwork

beforehand, the rest of the process will go much

smoother.

Identify one area.

Don't try to tackle everything at once. Your entire

apartment may need attention, but you are only

setting yourself up for failure if you try to do it all at

the same time. Instead, pick one room (or even one

part of a room) to declutter at a time. As you

conquer these smaller projects your momentum will

build and embarking on something larger and more

difficult (like your garage or attic!) will be easier.

Remove everything.

Take everything out. Dump that drawer, empty the

closet, or take all the books off the bookshelf. It's

going to be a mess, but it gets better, I promise.

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Replace items while asking tough questions.

Handle each item once and only once. Quickly

deci de whether this is something you are going to

keep or get rid of. You already have your boxes

labeled and ready to go, so deciding to get rid of

something means all you have to do is drop it in

the proper box. If you can't decide whether you

should keep something or not, ask yourself some

questions. Do you use this regularly? Do you love

it? Does bring beauty into your home? Does it

work? Err on the side of overpurging. Very rarely

will you get rid of something that is truly

irreplaceable. What may seem like an impossibly

austere space quickly becomes normal and you

may surprised yourself with how little you truly

need (or come to want!).

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Research the places you can donate old clothes: Hop on the internet and do some quick research as to where you can take old clothes. Or, if you don't need to purge your closet, do some research about where you can take your other clutter. Some electronics stores will recycle old computer components and many cities have locations to drop off hazardous material like old paint.

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Get the clutter out immediately!

Don't let the stuff you've designated as clutter sit

around. Don't give yourself time to change your

mind. You went with your gut and decided you

were going to sell it, donate it, or throw it away --

so get it out of your house as soon as possible!

Take some pictures and throw your stuff up on

Craigslist or eBay. Do whatever you have to do to

get rid of it quickly.

Maintain

Now that you have a beautifully decluttered area,

the key is to keep it that way. Luckily, I've

discovered that once you have spent the time to

purge an area it becomes much easier to keep it

that way. Before, when random things were laying

on the floor and your bookshelf was overflowing,

what did it matter if you added "one more thing" to

the pile? Now, if something is out of place it will

stick out. You will feel compelled to take care of it

immediately and prevent yourself from ever having

to go through this ordeal again.

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This is the series of steps I took to purge my closet several

years ago. I located the nearest Salvation Army and verified

that they accepted clothing donations. I got several empty

boxes, garbage bags, and a permanent marker. After I had

collected all my supplies, I took everything out of my closet

and laid it on my bed. After cleaning the closet shelf and

vacuuming the floor, I took each article of clothing one at a

time and asked myself some questions "Do I love this and

wear it regularly?" If I answered in the affirmative, then it

went back into the closet. If I answered in the negative, I

either put it in the garbage bag to throw away, the Donate

box, the Sell box, or the I Don't Know box. The key

component to this system was the I Don't Know box. Items

that I knew I should get rid of but couldn't bring myself to

for some reason went in this box. It would then get put

away somewhere out of sight and mind. If I found myself

really wishing I had something in that box, I allowed

myself the liberty to retrieve it. However, a year after the

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box went into storage, I donated it without ever opening it

again. Since I lived a year without something, particularly

an article of clothing, I really didn't need it. I then also

promptly took the items in the Donate and Sell boxes to

their respective places. I didn't want to give myself any

time to change my mind about any of the decisions I made.

Going through this process represented a significant initial

time and effort investment. However, I've been able to

keep my closet neat, minimal, and organized ever since

with little effort. These steps can also be applied to nearly

anywhere else in your home.

While physical purging is the most visibly obvious step you

can take, mental purging is just as important. Mental clutter

is an ambiguous term that is not easily defined. Think about

everything that is currently weighing on your mind. I'm

willing to bet that a lot of your mental clutter is thoughts of,

"I should do this," or, "Don't forget this!" or, "Remember to

fix this." An untold number of tolerations and annoyances

compete for your attention and brainpower every second of

every day. Getting them out of your head is like purging

your closet: everything fits much easier, you can find what

you're looking for, and you are less stressed. My experience

with David Allen's "Getting Things Done" system was the

starting point for purging my projects and getting my life

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under control. It doesn't matter if you use a system like

GTD or something of your own devising, the principle is

the same. You need to sit down and write down every

single thing that is on your mind. A complete mind dump.

Once you have everything out and on paper, you can start

clarifying your commitments, tossing out irrelevant

projects, and planning. The act of putting every worry and

every project on paper is very refreshing; purging the stuff

that doesn't matter is even more so.

My favorite ways to mentally purge are:

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Do a mental ‘RAM’ dump:

Sit down with a piece of paper and write down everything that's on your mind. All those ongoing projects, everything you should do, everything you want to do, everything, everything, everything. Now is not the time to filter what you are thinking, just get it all down on paper. Try using this checklist for inspiration.

Make a list of all the tolerances in your life:

A tolerance is something you notice from time to time but never do anything about. Maybe it's a broken lightbulb in the bathroom or a door that squeaks every time it opens. These little tolerances add up to a significant amount of brainpower and stress over time. Make a list of these and start knocking them out.

3 Close “open loops”:

Open loops are the small projects (often recurring) that aren't necessarily difficult. These tend to build up over time until you suddenly have a whole gaggle of open loops staring you in the face and weighing down your mind. I've discovered that taking a couple of hours and knocking out a few open loops is a great way to build momentum to work on my larger and more important projects.

4 Spend some time with your “someday/maybe” list:

Your someday/maybe list is where all your crazy ideas and dreams live. If it goes on your list it doesn't necessarily mean you have to do it; putting it on your list just means that you have it written down and aren't going to forget it. When you are looking for a new project or hobby, take a gander at this list and you find all the things you want to do and haven't yet. Most importantly, this means that your subconscious knows that any good idea you have will not be forgotten. It's not up to you to remember it forever if it's written down.

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The last idea I would like to address in this section is

purging your emotional and spiritual problems. Guilt,

outdated traditions, and addictions are all aspects of your

life that you could consider applying the principles of

purging. Advice in this area is especially personal so I will

keep it short. There are many negative emotions that you

can attempt to purge from your psyche. For instance,

feelings of anger or past injustice can be purged just like an

overflowing closet or a scattered mind. Letting go of past

hurts and forgiving those who have hurt you can have an

incredibly powerful effect on your own well-being. It is

much simpler to forgive and forget than it is to carry anger

with you. It's up to you to determine what is truly essential.

Once you've done that, everything else is just extra weight

holding you down.

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Make Progress Now!

Set up an eBay or Craigslist (or both!) account: It's simple and only takes a matter of minutes. Once you have an account you can very easily start posting your clutter to make some easy cash.

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Sometimes you’ve got to let everything go - purge yourself. If you are unhappy with anything…whatever is bringing you down, get rid of it. Because you’ll find that when you’re free, your true creativity, your true self comes out.Tina Turner