For the week of Thursday, November 22nd, 2012 • Volume 46, Issue 12

the

melioristyour independent student newspaper

Kelti BoissonneaultEditor-in-ChiefOpinions Editoreinc@themeliorist.ca

Billy DaveyFeatures Editorf.editor@themeliorist.ca

Travis RobinsonSports & Lifestyle Editors.editor@themeliorist.ca

Leyland BradleyCampus Beat & News Editorn.editor@themeliorist.ca

Maggie KogutEntertainment Editore.editor@themeliorist.ca

8 -116 - 7

12 - 1516 - 1718

4

1920 - 2122 - 2324 - 2526 - 2730

Campus BeatNews

FeaturesEntertainmentTop Story ProcrastinationOpinionSportsLifestyleTLFsStudents’ UnionClassifieds

The Meliorist: Mel-io-rism (meel’e

riz’m) the doctrine that the world tends to

become better or may be made better by

human effort

An autonomous body, separate from the U of L Students’ Union SU-166, 4401 University Drive West, Lethbridge, AB, T1K 3M4 Phone: 4 0 3 - 3 2 9 - 2 3 3 4 www.themeliorist.ca

Business ManagerNelson Chinb.manager@themeliorist.ca

Creative Director/ Ad Manager/Production Manager

Brandon Wallisad.manager@themeliorist.ca

Photo EditorJon Martinp.editor@themeliorist.ca

Art Department AssistantSam LoewenCopy EditorJames Forbes

Design AssistantsMyles HavingaNico Koppe

WebmasterChris MorrisPrintingSouthern AlbertaNewspaper GroupContributorsAndrew McCutcheonMakay MurrayJana Clark

Account RepresentativeKristy Jahn-Smithaccount.rep@themeliorist.ca

Design InternKenzie Ferguson

CoverJon MartinBrandon Wallis

Staff Writer/ Distribution ManagerMatt Baird

CartoonistRyan Kenworthy

The Meliorist is the student newspaper of the University of Lethbridge, published most Thursdays throughout the academic year by The Meliorist Publishing Society, an autonomous incorporated body. Please address all correspondence to The Meliorist, 4401 University Drive, Lethbridge Alberta, T1K 3M4, or drop it off at room SU-166. Deadline for submissions is Friday at 4 p.m. The Meliorist appreciates and encourages the writing of thoughtful, concise, timely letters. However, the Meliorist will only consider for publication those letters that are signed by the author. Special arrangements may be made for those wishing anonymity, but absolutely no pseudonyms. Letters should contain the author’s legible name, address, telephone number, and student identification number. The address, ID and phone number will not be published. The Meliorist reserves the right to edit submissions and will not print libelous material. Letters may be edited for brevity, clarity, and legality.

November 22, 2012 • 02

the

meliorist

November 22, 2012 • 04

Leyland BradleyNews Editor

the

meliorist

Police responded to an accident that occurred early in the afternoon of Wednesday, Nov. 14 in which 31-year-old Curtis Dodd, a construction worker, died of his injuries after a piece of equipment tipped onto him at the new residence construc-tion site. The university released an official statement that afternoon explaining that Dodd was not an employee of the University of Lethbridge, and that they are working in cooperation with the Lethbridge Regional Police and Alberta Occupational Health and Safety. Dodd had been employed by Zero Gravity Cranes and Rigging, had been well known to university employees as one of the main contacts for the project, and had worked on campus on numerous other projects. Reminders to students about Counselling Services on campus were included in the statement, as well as remind-ers to employees about grief/trauma counselling available through Homewood Solutions.

Dodd is survived by his parents, sister, and spouse. The Meliorist would like to extend our condolences to Dodd’s family, the other workers involved in the project, and others affected by this tragedy.

November 22, 2012 • 06

the

meliorist

Author, journalist, reporter and columnist for the Globe and Mail, Doug Saunders arrived at the U of L last Thursday to discuss his books Arrival City and The Myth of the Muslim Tide.

The Hamilton, Ontario native is the chief of the Globe and Mail’s London-based European Bureau. He is the four-time recipient of the National Newspaper Award – Canada’s equivalent to the Pulitzer Prize – and has been writing for the Globe and Mail since 1995.

Arrival City takes a look at the major shift of recent populations from rural environments to urban dwellings in cities across the world. According to his book, the task for arrival cities such as Toronto, Baltimore, and Mumbai is to successfully integrate migrants so as to ensure a healthy middle class. According to Saunder’s website, cities that do not properly administer integration for migrants will experience “increased social unrest, poverty, and religious fundamentalism.”

On Nov. 15, Saunders spoke to a crowd of Lethbridge community members, students, and professors about these arrival cities as the key to improving overall economic stability – locally, nationally, and internationally.

Saunders explained the approaches he took to gather his research from witnessing the migration patterns of people:

“I think if there’s one overarching lesson in the work that I’ve done in Arrival City, it’s that we need to look at the marginal communities around us in our cities, not as fixed points, not as people who are poverty-raised or are specific ethnographies, but who are points along a dotted line that’s taking them on a trajectory from some place to another place.

“I quickly learned a particularly important approach to marginal communities is not to go into them and

say what journalists usually say which is, ‘what’s wrong?’ because you will certainly get an answer to that, and there’s usually many, many things wrong, but instead to say, ‘where did you come from and where are you going?’ and to look at their household budgets and that sort of thing to find that out. You can learn a lot more about a place with that.”

Once integrated, the goal of migrant communities is to continue moving up, leaving room for other migrants to take their place.

When asked his thoughts about the single individuals who move to arrival cities versus the families that have historically moved to other nations (i.e., the Puritan families that moved to settle New England in 1600s America), Saunders explained the migrant situation in Canada today:

“Very often it’s one person who moves to an international city – it’s called chain migration. Canada’s migration laws make it very easy for single men – and single women – to come and work. Immigration laws sometimes make it hard to bring families together and this is a problem in Canada right now. Single men and women come to work in the oil patch. They are temporary workers under the law but are in fact going to be here for a long time. They have no links to their family, and this doesn’t create a very healthy community. There is a problem with immigration laws that are based around a semi-mythical idea of temporary migration because it rarely ever is temporary. Every immigrant from another country thinks they’re just here temporarily until 20 years pass, they fall in love, they get married, they start families, and they stay.”

The event was presented by the Prentice Institute, Friends of the Lethbridge Public Library, the Southern Alberta Council of Public Affairs, and the University of Lethbridge.

Leyland BradleyNews Editor

“”

ARRIVAL CITY AUTHOR MAKES APPEARANCE AT THE U OF L

November 22, 2012 • 07

the

meliorist

The Art Society is a club committed to helping students show their work and get the most of Lethbridge’s rockin’ art community. Membership is free and will get you the opportunity to be in our Show & Sale on campus each semester, fill your resume with exhibition experience, collaborate with your creative-minded peers and be a part of our many exciting events. Plus we’ll keep you updated on all the local art openings so you won’t miss a thing!

So far this semester we have participated in CKXU’s Love & Records event and held an artist trading card meet and greet. The 70-plus original trading cards created are on display on the 8th floor wall this week after which they will be sent to London, England in exchange for cards from artists there. Also keep an eye out for our Christmas Show & Sale, which will be Dec. 6 and 7 in the atrium.

We are also very excited to present the

Movember Live Art & Silent Auction at Essie's Nightclub on Nov. 28. It will be a great evening for a great cause with all proceeds going to prostate cancer. Admission is free with a non-perishable food item for the food bank; otherwise, a minimum $2 donation will be gladly accepted. There will be glorious mustaches, wine and cheese, student-friendly drink specials ($3 hi balls, $3.50 beer), live entertainment and beautiful works of art to be sold and admired. Entertainment will include headlining bands Grandola and Lustre Creame as well as the U of L’s very own DJ Soulflower, Object Manipulation Club, and yarn bombing by The Knitting Club!

Want to get involved or just stay updated on the local art community? E-mail artsociety@uleth.ca to start getting all the inside info on upcoming events! You can also like us on Facebook. See all your sexy mustaches soon!

Jana ClarkSecretary & Treasurer

November 22, 2012 • 08

the

meliorist

Billy DaveyFeatures Editor

1897Jewish immigrants start flooding into Palestine, part

of the Ottoman Empire at the time, after the First Zionist Congress was held in Switzerland. By 1903, 25,000 Jewish immigrants are in Palestine. Between 1904 and 1914, 45,000 more immigrants move in.1914

The Ottoman Empire sides with Germany in WWI, so Britain backs an Arab uprising, promising (in 1916) Arab leadership and independence after the war. However, in 1917 the Balfour Declaration also prom-ises a “national home” in Palestine for the Jewish people. 1918

After the war, the land is occupied by Britain, who was given control by the League of Nations in 1920. The British mandate controls what will be called Israel, the Gaza Strip, the West Bank, and Jordan. 1921

The British divide their occupied land in the Emirate of Transjordan, west of River Jordan, and the Palestine mandate, east of the river. In 1922, the British do a census that show the Jewish population is 11 per cent of Palestine. For over a decade after the census, more than 300,000 new immigrants arrive. In 1929, 133 Jews are killed by Palestinians and 110 Palestinians are killed by British police after tension between the Zionists and Arabs boils over. 1930s

A general strike in 1936 causes civil disobedience from the Arab population, and a Zionist group starts targeting British and Palestinians in attacks. Violent uprisings are defeated in 1938 after an increase in

British forces. The Jewish population increases just before WWII, after persecution from the Nazis. 1947

The British decide to give up their mandates so the UN can solve the Arab-Zionist problem. 1948

British troops withdraw and the first Jewish state (since early Biblical times) is established on May 15. On May 16, armies from Egypt, Iraq, Syria, Lebanon, and Jordan invade but are eventually routed. 1956

Israel along with France and Britain, invade Egypt up to the Suez Canal. Various nations around the world condemn this and Israel gives up the areas of Egypt the same year. 1964

The Palestinian Liberation Organization (PLO) is formed.1967

After tensions rise to a breaking point, Israel launches a pre-emptive strike against Arab troops on its borders. In the six day war Israel takes Gaza, Sinai from Egypt, the Golan Heights from Syria, and routs Jordan troops from East Jerusalem and the West Bank (some still reminisce about returning to the 1967 borders). The conflict displaces around 500,000 Palestinians, according to the UN. 1972

11 Israeli athletes are killed at the Munich Olympics after an attack from a militant Palestinian group. 1973

During the Jewish holy day of Yom Kippur, Egypt

and Syria launch a surprise attack hoping to regain the lost territory from the 1967 war. Parts of the Sinai and Golan Heights are retaken, but this is reversed in three weeks by Israeli forces who then push beyond the 1967 ceasefire boundaries. 8,500 Egyptian and Syrian soldiers and 6,000 Israeli soldiers are killed. After the war, Israel begins to rely more on the USA for support (economically, politically, and militarily) and Saudi Arabia restricts energy exports to pro-Israel states. 1974

Yasser Arafat, leader of the PLO, makes his first appearance at the UN to discuss a peaceful solution. His speech is critical in making the Palestinian Arab cause internationally recognized. 1979

Sinai is returned to Egypt after Israel and Egypt sign the Camp David accords, which includes a truce between the nations. However, Arab nations condemn Egypt for recognizing the Jewish state and in 1981 Egyptian President Anwar Sadat, who signed the Camp David Accords, is assassinated by Islamist radicals in the Egyptian army.1982

Israel invades Lebanon to destroy all PLO military bases after repeated attacks in the Israeli north and the attempted assassination of an ambassador. While the invasion is meant only to destroy bases around Israel’s border, the Israeli forces eventually take Beirut on Sept. 14. The Phalangists, allies of Israel, begin massa-cring Palestinians in Israeli-surrounded refugee camps from Sept. 16 to 18. It is one of the worst massa-cres in the recent history of the Middle East, causing the resignation of Israel’s defence minister. The PLO is expelled to Tunis.

November 22, 2012 • 09

the

meliorist

1987Palestinians in the Gaza Strip and West Bank begin a

popular uprising (or intifada) in response to the Israel occupation and the establishment of Jewish communi-ties in Palestinian land since the early 1980s. More than 1,000 Palestinians are killed in clashes with Israel forces until 1993. The Israeli forces are unable to stop the intifada. 1991

After Kuwait is liberated, the U.S. begins to focus on peacemaking in the Middle East. The U.S. begins to plan the Madrid Summit, which would involve Israel, Syria (still without their Golan Heights), Jordan, and Palestine. However, Israel refuses to negotiate with the PLO (which they still considered a terrorist organiza-tion), so a Jordanian-Palestinian delegation is formed. Mere days before the summit, the U.S. held back a $10 billion loan from Israel for the building of Jewish settlement on Palestinian lands. 1993

The Oslo Accords has Israel and PLO mutually recog-nize each other and launches a time of peacemaking between Israel and Arabs throughout the mid-1990s: Israel withdraws some of its forces from the Gaza Strip and the West Bank, allowing Palestinians self-rule; Jordan and Israel sign a peace agreement; Israel withdraws from Lebanon, with Hezbollah guerrillas harassing them on the way out. 1995

Opposition to the peace process begins to grow in Israel as bombings from Palestinians kills Israelis and as Israel begins assassinating militants. Oslo 2 is then signed in Egypt and the West Bank into three zones: “Zone A” would be under Palestinian control; “Zone B”

would be under Israel-Palestinian control; “Zone C” would remain under Israel control. Zones A and B comprise less than 30 per cent of the West Bank. Palestinians are unsatisfied and Jewish extremists are furious. Israel’s Prime Minister Yitzhak Rabin is assassinated on Nov. 4.1996

A series of suicide attacks in Israel, by Hamas, followed by a three-week bombardment of Lebanon by Israel. 2000

After an Israeli prime minister visits an important religious site in Jerusalem, Palestinian police end up trading fire with Israeli soldiers. Hundreds of casual-ties are accumulated. Assassinations of Palestinians increase as well as suicide bombing in Israel. By the end of the year, over 300 are dead. 2002

Another, more intensified, increase in suicide bomb-ings targets Israelis. In response, Israel reoccupies most of the West Bank and besieges the Palestinian president in his compound. The Israeli West Bank barrier begins construction.2003

The roadmap peace plan, published by the U.S., starts with a new Palestinian prime minister. Palestine announces a ceasefire but Israel continued targeting militant leaders. The new prime minister left office after a power struggle. After a suicide attack, Israel bombs a target in Syria. 2004

As bombings and the targeting of militant leaders continue, Israel withdraws from the Gaza Strip and

three large Settlements in the West Bank. After Palestinians rocket attacks on Israeli towns in Septem-ber, Israel launches attacks in the Gaza Strip. 2005

Israel withdraws settlers from the Gaza Strip. A ceasefire is announced in Egypt between Israel and Palestine, but militant groups (Hamas and Islamic Jihad) did not make an official ceasefire. 2006

Hamas wins majority government, and the U.S. and European countries respond by cutting funds to the Palestine Authority. Operation Summer Rains starts after Palestinians kills two Israeli soldiers and captures one. This then triggers the creation of the Israeli Iron Dome defence. 2008

After a six-month truce ends between Hamas and Israel — rocket fire from Gaza and airstrikes from Israel begin. 2009

Israel launches ground offensive to stop rocket attacks. 2011

Israel releases 1,027 prisoners in exchange for a solider captured in 2006. 2012

Rocket attacks from the Gaza Strip and airstrikes from Israel flare up again and Israel masses troops on borders. Peace talks are urged from the international community as fears of another ground offensive, such as the one in 2009, loom. As of Nov. 20, more than 130 Palestinians and five Israelis have been killed.

November 22, 2012 • 10

the

meliorist

What is your academic history?I completed my PhD in 2008 at the [Ontario Institute

for Studies in Education/ University of Toronto] in the department of sociology and equity studies.

What do you teach at the U of L?I teach women and gender studies 1000; 2600, which

is activism and advocacy; and then I also teach 3850, which is marriage and citizenship… 1000 and 2600 are required courses that I teach and the other courses I teach are on marriage and citizenship, and gender and sexuality.

What are your research interests and what publications have they led to?

My PhD dissertation, I finished that in 2008, focused on the racial politics of same-sex marriage; the struggle for legalization of same-sex marriage in Canada. So I have two articles published from that… A lot of my research focuses on questions in the area of socio-legal studies, like critical race feminism. I’m particularly interested in areas of marriage and marriage law and the way that that produces a normative citizenship. I have also done research on the issue of forced marriage in the U.K. and the civil partnership act… And now I’m doing a new research project on polygamy — the legal regulation of polygamy in Canada.

What have been some of the conclusions you are finding?

The victory of same-sex marriage was [seen as] one of progress and in some ways it was; marriage law is definitely a site that kind of reproduces and enacts already existing social relations of power, but I never

want to go into my research just assuming that because these social relations operate and manifest in different ways.

I think it’s interesting to consider the way that gender equality or “gay rights” is often used, particularly in a post-9/11 environment, to mark Canada as a civilized nation against other non-civilized nations. That’s one of the main things that I think about, is the way progressive discourses of women’s rights or gay rights are used in the service of building the nation, so to speak — defining what it means to be Canadian and who do we think Canadians are and what Canada stands for.

Can you explain “forced marriages” more?

Canada doesn’t have that kind of law but countries in Europe, like the Scandinavian countries and the U.K., have all implemented a forced marriage bill to combat the forced marriages that are happening in those countries. This whole debate, this whole issue of forced marriage is located in the immigration of people who are Muslim into the U.K. or Norway or Denmark. There’s a real kind of moral panic that these young girls are being forced to marry against their will. So, Denmark, the U.K., and Norway have all raised the age which anyone in those countries can marry, and they’ve also implemented forced marriage legislation that is seen to criminalize anyone who participates or enables a forced marriage — that’s certainly more Denmark, but the U.K. has gone the more civil route.

There is this idea that it’s this, supposedly, “cultural practice” that these Western states have to combat, and they do that through the law.

For your research into polygamy, are there certain groups that you are looking at?

Well, I’m not an anthropologist, so I don’t go and study cultures… But, there is an openly polygamist community in Bountiful, B.C., and they’re a fundamen-talist sect of the LDS, of the Mormon Church. It’s been known for years that they openly practise polygamy, so the RCMP in B.C. in 2008 pressed charges against them; they were violating Canada’s criminal code. The charges were dropped by a judge; and then the attorney general, instead of appealing that decision, asked the B.C. Supreme Court to make a reference — in Canadian law if you have a reference decision, it’s not like a legally binding judgement, it’s just a legal opinion or advisory decision. So the B.C. Supreme Court released this reference decision in November that basically argued that while these two men’s charter right to religious freedom was being violated by the prohibitions against polygamy, the criminal code provisions on polygamy are justified. The court argued that polygamy is inherently harmful to women, to children, and to the institution of monogamous marriage.

The decision is like 335 pages long, so I’m doing a kind of a textual analysis of that decision. Canada has had anti-polygamy provisions since about 1890, so I’m interested in looking in the history because there have only been, I think, six or seven cases using section 293 since 1890 to 2008. So I want to do a historical analysis of those cases because I’m really interested in the way that law regulates our intimate lives. Our intimate lives and our family form are never only private matters; the nation-state is very much interested and concerned with who forms a family and what types of families those are.

Billy DaveyFeatures Editor

How do state laws regulate our intimate lives and relationships?An interview with Dr. Suzanne Lenon

November 22, 2012 • 11

the

meliorist

This is the Information Age where data and informa-tion can be flung around the globe, replicated, stored and retrieved with trivial ease. The hard part is keeping that information from being replicated and viewed by others. Your data may not be illegal, however because of its nature would best be kept private. These may be things like your photographic collections of you and your girlfriend, business trade secrets (for once you are out of university), or even your mother’s secret tart recipe. Whatever the reason, there are some things that each of us would rather keep off the internet.

The first rule of keeping data safe from prying eyes is to never allow it to get into a digital form. The best way is to keep it in your mind only. The second best is to keep it out of digital form. As soon as something is in a digital form it is infinitely copy-able and can be transmitted over the internet — if copied, it can never be assuredly removed from the internet. If you have photos you don’t ever want to be spread, use a polaroid camera. If you have text you don’t want to be copied, write it on paper by hand. Unfortunately, physical objects have a limited ability to be transmitted long distances, so if you are trying to communicate with only one person, mailing letters is much slower than electronic communications. To maintain the benefits of electronic devices while minimizing the privacy-related dangers of electronic data, we can employ a technology called encryption.

Before we get started, let me state that there is a tradeoff of convenience against security. To illustrate this concept, think about it from a physical security stand-point. If I want immediate access to a letter, the most convenient thing for access would be to leave it readily available on a desk. If I want to add more security to the letter, I can place it into a safe, ensuring that someone would either need to steal the safe or crack the combination to get the letter (both pretty challenging things). However, if I want to read that same letter I’m going to have to spin the dial and enter the code to access my letter. This tradeoff of security over immediate convenience is similar to the tradeoff for electronic encryption.

For the layman, encryption is translation into an unreadable form that requires a translation key to be read. The key is often referred to as a passphrase, and once your computer has this passphrase, it can translate the garbled data into the actual message or document.

An easy way to encrypt or “lock” a document or collection of documents is to use a free, open-source piece of software that can be obtained here: http://www.truecrypt.org/. This software runs on every computer platform, from OSX to Windows to Linux. For a full walkthrough of how to use this to its true potential, refer to this site: http://www.truecrypt.org/docs/?s=tutorial. True Crypt works by creating a block of data that is encrypted using a hashing algorithm along with your passphrase. This block of data can be any size, but

keep in mind that if you put this file on a thumb-drive formatted as FAT32 the block cannot be bigger than 4.0GB. This is due to the limitations in FAT32 at addressing files larger than that size.

However, these blocks of data have limitations: once created, they cannot be expanded. For example, if you were to create a 1GB encrypted file and then discover that it cannot contain all your photos inside, you cannot simply increase the size of the block to 1.5GB. You will have to start an encryption process all over again on a fresh block. With regard to this concern, you can encrypt an entire drive and access to the drive will be restricted to you because the drive looks like it’s 100 per cent full of data, and only when you de-crypt the drive with your passphrase does it show what data it actually contains.

Now, on the same note of the fully encrypted drive, there is a super awesome concept known as a “false bottom.” This is for the situation where under duress or legal obligation you are forced to de-crypt your drive. This could be at a border crossing or airport

when an agent asks you to show them the contents of your drive. The idea is to have one large encrypted volume of 10GB, but inside of that encrypted volume place another 2GB encrypted container. The exact process to perform this can be read about on the tutorial site I linked to earlier. This encrypted container looks like a 10GB blob of data and when you enter passphrase number one it opens the 10GB block and shows your less critical data, and if you were to enter passphrase number two, however, it would open the 2GB super-secret data block. This way you can maintain plausible deniability when a border agent demands access to the drive. You can show them your business information but the photos of your wife can remain safe and secure.

If you liked this and would like to suggest other topics for me, drop me a line at Feeback@universitypowerusers.com and checkout the podcast over at universitypowerusers.com where I talk out loud for an hour about all the same kinds of stuff I write here.

Makay MurrayFeatures Writer

November 22, 2012 • 12

the

meliorist

Maggie KogutEntertainment Editor

In support of Bullying Awareness Week, which ran last week from Nov. 12 to 17, Canadian artists banded together to re-record Cyndi Lauper’s classic “True Colors.” The artists worked on this project with Kids Help Phone under the name “Artists Against.” Artists part of this project include Pierre Bouvier (Simple Plan), Jacob Hoggard (Hedley), Lights, Kardinal Offishall, Fefe Dobson, Alyssa Reid, Walk Off The Earth, and Autotune The News. You can check out the “True Colors” campaign at the following website: www.kidshelpphone.ca/mytruecolors. The site features the official music video for “True Colors,” the track itself, and a short public service announcement video.

Recent bullying tragedies reinforce the need to create awareness, programs, support, and strategies to eradicate bullying both regular and cyber. The record-ing of “True Colors” raises funds and awareness for anti-bullying campaigns and 100 per cent of the net proceeds from the song, which is available to down-load through digital stores like iTunes, will be donated

to Kids Help Phone. This organization is a vital aid for youth in need of help. Kids Help Phone provides direct, professional counselling through the phone and also offers counselling forums and invaluable informa-tion for self-growth through their websites. Kids Help Phone is available for youth literally any day, any time, and in true Canadian spirit, is available in English or in French.

Other companies that have joined Against Artists to support Kids Help Phone and the anti-bullying cause include MuchMusic and BlueNotes. Throughout Bullying Awareness Week, MuchMusic aired the “True Colors” video, artist interviews, and other related content which can be checked out at MuchMusic.com/muchtalksbullying. BlueNotes covered the merchandise portion of the campaign through limited edition “True Colors” t-shirts. All net sale proceeds from t-shirt sales will go to Kids Help Phone.

The endeavour to raise awareness and funds through music reminisces of K’naan’s “Wavin’ Flag” track from

2009. In 2010, a group of Canadian artists banded together under the name “Young Artists for Haiti,” as you may remember, and re-recorded the song as a track single charity to raise money for Free the Children, War Child Canada, and World Vision Canada in relief efforts following the Haiti earthquake. The list of artists involved in this project is way too long to write out, but includes K’naan (of course), Nelly Furtado, Sam Roberts, Lights, and City and Colour among many others. Roughly a month after the track’s release, CBC reported that the track raised “more than $1 million” for disaster relief in Haiti.

“Wavin’ Flag” stands as evidence for what a simple song can achieve in support of a cause. Although the “True Colors” anti-bullying campaign focuses more on a national scale rather than an international scale, hopefully it will have a similar relative impact as the “Young Artists for Haiti” had – not only to raise funds for Kids Help Phone, but more importantly to raise awareness and support for the anti-bullying cause.

November 22, 2012 • 13

the

meliorist

Andrew McCutcheonEntertainment Writer

Andrew Martin

With the American election over and done, it's time to get back to the important issues and questions of our day. The crucial exigency that I hope to solve on behalf of the Canadian people today? The long defunct (and mostly dead) Ramones are one of the most overrated bands of the 20th century. Moreover, I will explain why if you like the Ramones and what they (musically) stand for, you probably would have voted Romney/Ryan in the past election.

The Ramones formed in New York in the 1970s and while they did not invent punk, they seemed to embody what punk rock stood for at that time. With hard-and-fast riffing, subversive lyrics, and a wholly constructed aesthetic, Ramones have been argued as having saved rock music from itself. But what exactly were they saving it from? They argued that everything in 1974 was “Long jams, long guitar solos… overproduced or just junk.” There we go! It all makes sense now; therein lies the rub. Apparently the Ramones were trying to save rock from bombastic, over-the-top rock bands of the late ‘60s and early ‘70s. It’s good to know that rock needed  to be saved  from bands like Led Zeppelin or Queen!

But of course, I am using misleading rhetoric. Moreover, it can be seen that the sort of bands the Ramones were rebelling against were what they saw as overhyped arena-rock bands of the day. These would have been bands like KISS, Boston, or Foreigner who were relentlessly popular and (in the eyes of rock critics) artistically bankrupt. So the Ramones saved us by showing us the error of our ways, right? Fuck no. Elitist music fans like to think back on those bands as being ridiculous to the point of self-parody and then conveniently forget that  KISS was friggen’ awesome! Highly produced, well-written six-chord rock anthems coupled with talented musicianship and incredible stage presence didn’t make KISS ridiculous, it made them a legitimately great band. Again, we are supposed to think that because bands like KISS were popular and the Ramones were counter-culture, that somehow the Ramones were more artistically valuable. But this also makes the Ramones elitist. Which of course explains why they were

allowed to unabashedly write the same three-chord song over and over again, and people still worshipped the ground that they walk on. Yet KISS is considered artistically bankrupt? Help me out here. I feel like I’m taking crazy pills.

Over and over people tell me that I just don’t get the idea of the Ramones. The unfortunate thing is I do get the idea; I just still take umbrage with it. The Ramones wanted to go back to what they saw as the heyday of rock and roll. They wanted to emulate bands they grew up listening to in the ‘50s and ‘60s like The Beach Boys. So what we see here as an appearance of counter-culture is in fact a conservative reactionary step back. The Ramones didn’t like the direction where rock was going, so they wanted to take a step back. So what we have here is a group of elitist individuals who decidedly dislike the pluralistic and are attempting a movement back towards what they see as “The good ol’ days.”

Oh. I’m not just describing the Ramones here. I’m also describing the Republican Party.

The parallel is humorous, but not untrue! While “The Republicans” are attempting to get social values set back to the ‘50s, the Ramones were trying to set their riffs back to bubble-gum pop of the same period. Romney disliked the 99 per cent movement and the Ramones were decidedly anti-populist as well. Thankfully, the popular vote went to the correct candidate in both circumstances and the only 1 per cent that the Ramones paralleled was their record sales in comparison to those of KISS (zing!). I guess in this situation that would make Gene Simmons the figure of Barack Obama. But I’m 89 per cent positive that Gene Simmons never ordered drone strikes on Pakistan.

Anyway, the Ramones aren’t necessarily a terrible band or a bad idea, but it is just simply frustrating to see accolades heaped on a band that did very little right compared to their contemporaries (who are constantly marginalized). I’d rather listen to “Detroit Rock City” or Led Zeppelin IV any day of the week, but every once in a while I guess I could handle listening to a Ramones album.

But I’d wanna be sedated.

November 22, 2012 • 14

Maggie KogutEntertainment Editor

the

meliorist

On Nov. 25 at 8 p.m., the Theatre Arts Society is presenting Twoonie Theatre: A Black Tie Affair. The event will be held at the David Spinks Theatre, and as the event title suggests, admission costs $2. Twoonie Theatre is an event put on twice a year by the Theatre Arts Society, and according to Becca McDonald, event coordinator, the event “is a chance for anyone who wants to perform to come, and they get a 10 minute time slot to do whatever it is they want to do.” Mono-logues, songs, even being wrapped in saran wrap – any kind of performance is welcome at Twoonie Theatre. “We’re looking for anything at all, and it’s a good way to kind of push yourself to maybe something that you’re not normally comfortable with as an artist because it’s a really safe environment to experiment in,” says McDonald.

The event is open to all students of all faculties. Some

of the performances that the audience will see in this semester’s show include musical theatre performances from the Musical Theatre Society, authors giving stage reading of their plays, stand-up comedy, a magic show, and dance performances from the Dance Team.

Proceeds from the show will go to the Theatre Arts Society to cover the show’s decorations as well as champagne. Oh la la, this is truly going to be a black tie affair. Left over funds will go to the society to put on other events. “We don’t want it to be something that’s expensive for people,” says McDonald, but a mere $2 from a large amount of show-goers can go a long way in helping a great club put on events for students.

The Theatre Arts Society is “basically just a club to get together people that love drama,” says McDonald. She specifies that it’s not necessarily a club for drama majors, but also a club for management majors, or

science majors, or any majors who always did drama in high school, or people who love seeing theatre, or people who just love drama. “It’s just a good way to get people together so that we can talk about [drama], and have people to connect to and have a way to know what’s going on in the school. We’re here so you know who to talk to get involved in auditioning and seeing shows and whatnot,” says McDonald.

So for a night of classy fun, champagne, and neat performances that you might not get to see through other venues, check out Twoonie Theatre: A Black Tie Affair. There is no date set yet for the second Twoonie Theatre event of this year, but following the “Theatre Arts Society” page on Facebook will keep you up to date with upcoming events put on by the club.

Maggie KogutEntertainment Editor

November 22, 2012 • 15

the

meliorist

Stunning, harmonious, beautiful, melodious. It was nigh impossible to walk away from Cappella Artemisia’s performance without a new appre-ciation for the beauty of vocal and instrumental classical pieces from the 16th and 17th centuries in Italy.

The extraordinarily talented 10-member Italian ensemble is composed of vocalists Candace Smith, Agnes Zsigovics, Mya Fracassini, Pamela Lucciarini, Phoebe Jevtovic Rosquit, and Silvia Vajente; organist Miranda Aureli; corenet-tists Bruce Dickey and Kiri Tollaksen; and gambist Erin Headley. The ensemble performed superb musical pieces that were performed, and sometimes composed, by nuns in 16th- and 17th-century convents.

As Candace Smith explained during the concert, during that period, in an effort to “clean up their act,” the Catholic Church enforced strict rules in the convents. The nuns couldn’t even be seen by the outside world in some cases, even by their families, but they could certainly be heard. Tourists from all over the world flocked to Italy’s convents to hear the beautiful voices rising from behind convent walls. This popularity prompted the church to restrict and in some cases even ban musical creation in convents. Regardless, as heard by the beautiful music performed last

Thursday, nuns living in these convents did not fail to leave an astounding mark in the world in spite of the restrictions imposed on them.

The voice and the instrumental performances in the concert were astounding. The vocals were so crisp that every syllable of the complex multiple syllable words could be heard with sharpness, yet the voices flowed together and rose in impeccable harmony and smoothness. The performances were so accurate, so passion-ate, so beautiful, there is really nothing more that I can say to highlight the impeccable talent in the Cappella Artemisia ensemble.

The concert also offered an interesting oppor-tunity to hear the cornet in pieces of music at what was the height of the instrument’s career before it disappeared in the 19th century. The cornet is a horn wind instrument that, according to player Bruce Dickey, is truly played best when it imitates human voice well. One song, an improvisational song from the period, was truly amazing, and the melodies and improvisational flow faintly resembled Jazz… but centuries ago.

Between each musical piece, a member of the ensemble gave fascinating insight into the world inhabited by these nuns. These back stories were quite interesting, especially one that told of a bishop who built walls locking in the nuns. When

he came by the next day, the nuns had broken down the walls, and began throwing the bricks at the bishop, helped by neighbourhood children who passed bricks over the walls, cheering, “Long live the nuns!” There is something so mildly amusing and oddly satisfying about rebel-lious nuns.

However, staying within the boundaries of rebellion, all the pieces that the nuns sang were of course religious. But the ensemble did present a piece from a popular genre that allowed nuns to play secular songs. These secular songs were rewritten with religious lyrics in order to be allowable (barely) to be sung in convents. The one we heard had adapted lyrics from the Song of Songs, the most sensual book in the bible; in Venice it was decreed that lyrics from the Song of Songs “should not be sung by nuns at all,” but they still were, of course.

Although the concert was remarkable, classical music is classical music, and I found myself losing focus by the last song – but I also have the attention span of a gold fish; I had a fish once, Beta. What was I saying? …Oh yes, Cappella Artemisia gave a beautiful concert, and even my fragile attention span lasted long enough to gather that.

November 22, 2012 • 18

the

meliorist

Sudoku

Crossword ACROSS1. Intelligent6. Sounded (a bell)10. Mimicked14. Largest internal organ in humans15. Compound found in urine16. Scarce17. Betel palm18. Carbon-ation19. Smoking pipe20. Spore covering22. Genus of sandpipers24. Writing tools25. Tales26. Fight back29. Western alliance30. Dull pain31. Iridescent37. Displayed light or brilliance39. John Lennon's widow Yoko ___40. Edible roots41. Gathering of folk singers44. Regulates

agriculture45. Risque46. Celebration of Christ's resurrection48. Do away with52. Spanish for "For"53. Wooden hammer54. A large travelling trunk58. Bear constellation59. Electrical engineering group61. Motorcyclist62. Appear63. Movie/videogame heroine ____ Croft64. River in France65. Writer ____ St. Vincent Millay66. A Chinese dynasty67. Bowel cleansing

DOWN1. Smack2. Muck3. Affirm4. Receiver5. Exchanges6. Latin for "Reddish"7. ____ and Thummim8. French for "Nose"9. A name for a newspaper10. Shady treed garden alcove11. First President of Corsica (1755-1769) Pasquale _____ (1725-1807)12. Comedian _____ Kovacs13. French impressionist painter Edgar _____ (1834-1917)21. Within23. Cook in an oven25. Hairdresser's establishment26. Skin irritation27. Reflected sound28. Dispel29. Child

caregiver32. Simmer in a small amount of liquid33. The act of producing an effect34. Formerly35. Knot or joint36. Russian emperor38. Strange or weird42. In a cruel or unpleasant manner43. 365 days47. Tillable48. Cause to laugh49. Revealed50. Superman's pal Jimmy _____51. Andes Mountains beast of burden52. Song of joyful praise54. Bodily fluids55. Someone from Oklahoma(slang)56. Bacterium57. Region60. French for "Water"

Easy

Ha

rd

Snowy Bear

November 22, 2012 • 19

This coming weekend will feature people stampeding to malls, shopping centres, and super-sized box-stores across the continent to get their holiday shopping finished at the lowest possible price. It is the corporate-created holiday termed “Black Friday” – a name originating the start of the period in which most retailers are operating “in the black” thanks to the mad holiday-shopping rush. This event, followed by Cyber Monday in which online retailers slash their prices in perfect mimicry of the event that has people lining up for hours, pepper spraying children, and in some cases shooting each other in order to get the best deal.

Yes, this weekend promises to display some of the most appalling human behaviour civilized citizens can participate in as people mad-scramble for the last Xbox or copy of Halo 4 on shelves. Now, to be clear, this isn't an article opposing the holiday itself (as the sensationalist headline would suggest); I'm all for thrifty shopping and helping people get those things they desire and think will make their lives better. What this article and its author oppose are the radical, violent, and often idiotic methods which these amazing deals invite.

Last year witnessed a whole slew of unfortunate events, from random shootings in Wal-Mart to a lady pepper spraying groups of people, including children, to grab the last of an item on display. It boggles my mind as to why anyone would engage in this behaviour, or chance that the other people raging in line for the best deal on

their prized “want” might not be carrying a gun, or actually be insane enough to physically hurt strangers in the effort to gain possession of a toy.

That being said, I know a number of Canadians will be crossing borders, flooding the cities of our southern neighbour in an effort to achieve what Black Friday promises: the chance to get all your shopping done for a fraction of its actual cost. To those determined to go, I wish you the best of luck. I will be staying here.

Why would I not want to take advantage of these amazing deals? It's because of who they are sponsored by. Wal-Mart, Target, and all the other large corporate names have the ability to slash these prices because of the size of their corporate empire. The quality is minimal, the chances of most of the items lasting out the year is low, and the experience promises to be aggravating with long lines, screaming children, and people arguing over whom the not-yet-purchased item rightfully belongs to.

More than that, however, I will strive to do the majority of my holiday shopping this year at home in Lethbridge, buying from those stores that cannot afford the extravagant price reductions. I will choose to support the local economy this year, as I have often done in the past. Is the selection as good? Probably not. Are the prices

low? No, these shopkeepers and small-business owners still need to turn a profit in the never-ending struggle against the massive corporate pimps of the retail world. And as a citizen of Lethbridge, I would be proud to support these shopkeepers – the quality of the product is often better, it will last longer, and if you buy locally chances are, if something does go wrong with a product, a shopkeeper will be happy to fix

it, replace it, or send it back to the manufacturer on warranty and give you better customer service than any of the corporations can offer. And the money that I earn in this community stays in this community – it stays with the workers who are employed in the shops, and allows Lethbridge to have an identity other than “the closest Wal-Mart” for many of our outlying communities.

Therefore I encourage everyone to partake in Black Friday, but do so at home. Lethbridge is hosting Plaid Days this year, in a similar spirit to the Black Friday of America – offering great deals at home by local shops supporting local manufacturers and local artists. The best way to keep our economy strong is to support what we hope to get out of it: variety, deals, and a sense of community.

Kelti BoissonneaultEditor-in-Chief

Our truth and effortBlack Friday epitomizes everything wrong with capitalism

”“…smal l -bus ines s

owners still need to turn a profit in the n e v e r - e n d i n g struggle against the massive corporate pimps…

the

meliorist

pro�t

November 22, 2012 • 20

Travis Robinson Sports Editorial

the

meliorist

Ward is simply the best fighter in the sport today. A quiet, humble man, Ward is a religious devotee who lives up to his “Son of God” nickname by avoiding the incendiary banter of his competitors and instead using his fists to speak volumes. Modest by nature, Ward is a tenacious technician inside the ring. He has overwhelmed his previous 26 opponents with his conditioning, and at 6’0” tall, has kept them at bay with a sizeable reach advantage. At 28, Ward is just reaching his prime, and will be a delight to watch for many years to come. If he can drop down a few weight classes and shut the cancerous Floyd Mayweather up, Ward will be revered for many years to come. He has the necessary skills to do the job. As well-rounded a fighter as I have ever seen, Ward will see his name amongst the great-est when his career ends.

Donaire is cut from the same cloth as fellow countryman Manny Pacquiao, but may be even better. A ridiculously quick striker, Donaire has shown he possesses the same finesse/power combination Pacquiao has, all in a smaller and more dangerous package. Donaire is reminiscent of the late Venezuelan lightweight Edwin Valero, who himself won all 27 of his fights by knockout. While Nonito Donaire may not be as devastating as Valero, he has the necessary skills to draw paychecks as big as Pacquiao. While he may be 30, Donaire still has some years left in him to bring fame back to the Philippines.

The retired Mike Tyson was the last heavyweight boxer that anyone noticed, for reasons sometimes outside of the ring. Klitschko should change this. A complete character foil of Mike Tyson, Klitschko is an intelligent athlete with a PhD in sports science and boxing smarts to match. While the heavyweight division is rather marginal in boxing today, Klitschko is a very good fighter. He uses his extreme size (6’6”) and reach advantage to overpower lesser opponents. He also brings tempo to the usually sluggish heavyweight bouts. For such a big man, Klitshcko is agile, and has proven to be a cerebral and reliable heavyweight who can draw big crowds. Although he is 36, Dr. Steelhammer still has some good years left in him. Klitschko recently dominated Polish monstrosity Mariusz Wach, proving that no man is safe from his cement-mixer fists.

Undefeated and loving it, Garcia is an underrated fighter lost in the quagmire that is American boxers. He has risen from the slurry with his speed and his twin defeats of the legendary Erik Morales, along with an upset of the once-dominant Amir Khan in July of this year. Garcia will face a major challenge in his upcoming fight against the always dangerous veteran fighter Zab Judah in February of next year. If Garcia can maintain his undefeated record, he will undoubtedly be taking on Pacquiao in a high-paying fight in the near future. Garcia has the tools to devastate the legend, and bring American dominance to the lighter weight classes of boxing.

November 22, 2012 • 21

the

meliorist

Gonzalez may be the best pound for pound fighter in the world today. Although he fights in the most unnoticed weight class in boxing, he has a magnetic quality that eclipses his tiny frame. A capable striker with the typical mind-bending speed of a flyweight, Gonzalez is a true scrapper, and brings the hardships of his past to each round he fights. Lightweight fights can be the most exciting and invigorating to watch as a spectator, and if there is one fighter who can transcend the anonymity of the weight class, Gonzalez is surely the man.

Bradley’s record was given a boost by the horrific judging of his June bout with Manny Pacquiao. Bradley was awarded a perplexing split decision victory against the Pacman, despite being controlled and dissected by Manny throughout the fight. Timothy Bradley does not deserve to be undefeated, but has proven to be a quality competitor with a similar skill set as his fellow countryman Floyd Mayweather Jr. The welterweight division is always crowded, and Bradley has slipped below the radar time and time again. He TKO’d the usually stellar Joel Casamayor last November, proving he has the power necessary to climb through the division. His last three fights have been against better opponents, and if Bradley wins the already planned rematch against Pacquiao, he may separate himself from the rest of his competitors.

Cruiserweight is another arcane division oftentimes forgotten in the sport. It is a weight division that many deem unnecessary, and consists of a constantly revolving door of champions. Hernandez hopes to change the commotion of the division, and with his record and ability, he may very well. Although all his fights take place overseas in Germany, Hernandez has escaped this obscurity to become a big name in the cruiserweight division’s history. If he keeps up the hard work, he may get a shot at heavyweight, where a large Ukrainian waits for his arrival.

An undefeated bruiser, Cloud is another unknown who deserves more recognition than he receives. He has escaped a rocky childhood in the tough inner city neighborhoods of northern Florida to become the biggest name to hit the light heavyweight division in recent memory. His IBF title seems relatively untouchable, as Cloud has defended it multiple times over the past three years. The American public has grown fond of Cloud’s rags to riches tale, and if he continues to do his job effectively, Cloud may get the chance to drop down a weight class to fight a super middleweight like Andre Ward.

Yet another undefeated fighter, Quillin is a tall aggressor who sets the tempos of his fights. He rose to prominence after his TKO of the stellar Scotsman Craig McEwan in 2011, and cemented his rising star status after retiring an aging Winky Wright in June of this year. Since then, Quillin has been working hard with Manny Pacquiao’s trainer Freddy Roach to hone his hand speed. Signed to Oscar de la Hoya’s promotional agency, Quillin has the appropriate people surrounding him to groom him into a superstar. If Quillin is willing to put his record on the line against Andre Ward, Kid Chocolate may become boxing’s biggest name, and one of its most competitive unde-feated fighters.

No list of exciting fighters is complete without Martinez. An ageless wonder, the cyclist turned champion boxer has proven time and time again that he is the classiest fighter of his generation. He brings it to his opponents with a southpaw stance and undying athleticism, and loves to be the showman in his bouts. Martinez accepts any challenge directed towards him, and at 37, still remains a capable middleweight. Boxing fans will get a treat if Martinez decides to step up a weight class to face Andre Ward. For now, however, they can look at Martinez as a seasoned champion with really nothing left to prove.

November 22, 2012 • 22

the

meliorist

Travis RobinsonLifestyle Editor

The tarantula is a classic pet that grew a major following when high school science labs were still permitted to house live animals. Colourful and even-tempered, the tarantula is the terrestrial equivalent of a fish. It is a display pet, even though many species are nocturnal and remain in their burrows for most of the day. Tarantulas are impressive creatures, and make the perfect display piece for a small space. They are relatively clean animals, and require minimal care and housing requirements. Tarantulas can live for several decades, and are thus a very hardy species of exotic pet. It is not recommended to handle a taran-tula, as they are not only fragile but can inflict a nasty bite if provoked. The species that most enthusiasts consider to be the best is the Chilean rose variety, as they are extremely hardy and feed well. Species such as the king baboon of Africa are to be avoided by keepers, as these spiders are fiercely territorial and large in size. Tarantulas feed on a diet consisting mainly of crickets and other small insects. The proper tank setup should include a substrate for the animal to burrow in, a shallow water dish, hiding place, and climbing apparatus for arboreal species.

The less popular equivalent to a tarantula, the scorpion is a fascinating display pet with a growing legion of followers. Although nasty when provoked, the scorpion is generally docile and solitary, preferring to be left alone. For obvious reasons, the scorpion should not be handled, as the venomous stinger can inflict an irritating sting. The emperor scorpion is the unanimous first choice for most keepers, as its impressive size makes it an eye-catching addition to any terrarium. The scorpion is much like the tarantula in care. As an arachnid, its diet consists mainly of insects such as crickets, although larger species may gradu-ate up to pinky mice and other small vertebrates. Housing should be in a similar tank as a tarantula, with more water for the desert-loving creature. Hiding places are essential, along with proper ventilation of the tank. A heat lamp will be necessary for the scorpion, as they need a hot, arid climate in order to flourish.

The strangest member of the lizard family is a challenging but rewarding pet for any hobbyist. The chameleon may have a slow demeanor and bizarre look, but they can become aggressive and hostile if stressed or provoked. Many chameleon enthusiasts agree that this lizard is meant for more experienced keepers. The veiled chameleon is the most popular choice amongst the species, due to its body size and exotic colouring. The chameleon has a diverse diet that includes worms, small insects, and leafy green vegetables. The housing of a chameleon can be quite intricate, as they require a longer, taller tank to mimic their natural habitat. Branches and other climbing apparatuses are essential, along with a heat lamp and appropriate in-tank vegetation. The chameleon will require misting to keep it hydrated. Chameleons can be handled, but due to their unorthodox and unpredictable movements, are best kept in their tank.

The corn snake is, through and through, the most popular pet snake for any keeper. It is a hardy, docile, and even friendly snake with simple and minimal requirements. The snake feeds on mice; depending on the snake’s size, these mice can range anywhere from pinkie (newborn) mice to full grown adults. The snake should be fed in a container outside of its tank; this way, the animal does not mistake your hand for a food item when you go to handle it. The corn snake is fond of handling, and thus can be kept by even the most novice of snake keepers. Its tank should be roomy, with a substrate consisting of simply newspaper for a juvenile animal to shedding for a mature adult. The corn snake comes in a great variety of colour morphs, with breeders developing more colour morphs each and every year. Due to these morphs, the corn snake is no longer regarded as a rustic animal but more a reasonable facsimile to a tropical species. The corn snake is a master escaper, and thus the proper measures must be taken in order to prevent escape; I can remember my mother having to coax my pet corn snake from the top shelf of my closet when I was a young hobbyist. While most of us cannot keep an anaconda in our respective spaces, the corn snake is a great choice for anyone looking for a simple but elegant exotic animal.

November 22, 2012 • 23

the

meliorist

The iguana has fallen on hard times; it is no longer a popular exotic pet but has rather been delegated to the history books of hobbyists. More iguanas turn up abandoned at animal shelters than they do in pet stores or speciality shops these days. Most cite the tough care requirements of this lethargic but still moody lizard as reason to avoid keeping it. If you are willing to take a chance on this lizard, it can be a very interesting and eye-catching exotic pet. The tank must be large to accommodate this robust lizard; adults can grow up to two meters in length. The iguana is herbivorous, and feasts on lettuce and other greens. It can be handled, but at the risk of the keeper; its claws can inflict serious gashes. This creature loves to climb, so having in-tank branches are a must. Overall, this once faddish reptile is still worth keeping if one is willing to put in the time, effort, and patience to rear a healthy and happy animal.

The anole is a darting lizard species that is strictly a display pet, albeit a fascinating one. It loves to climb, so a tank with more vertical than horizontal is ideal. These lizards do not fare well when handled, and are thus meant to be viewed and not felt. Their diet consists of small insects, augmented with the occasional meal worm. Without a doubt the cheapest exotic pet you can buy, the anole is readily available at any pet store or from any breeder. They are quick, so escape-prevention measures are a must for this lizard. With the proper care, anoles can also reach great milestones in longevity.

For the more adventurous snake keeper, the ball python is the friendliest exotic snake one can find. It is an extremely docile animal, preferring to ball up rather than bite. As such, its tank must cater towards burrowing rather than climbing. Multiple hiding places are a must, along with a malleable substrate. The ball python feeds on adult mice, with the occasional serving of rat for a larger snake. Once again, keeping the tank and feeding area separate are essential for the welfare of your fingers. Although not as receptive as the corn snake to handling, the ball python is one of the few python species that can be held with confidence. Colour morphs among the ball pythons are some of the most impressive of the animal kingdom; the pied ball colouring is a particular favourite of mine.

A lesser-known exotic pet, the stick insect is a quirky and fascinating insect that is the simplest exotic animal to care for. It requires minimal housing, and feeds on leafy vegetation. They can also be handled with confidence, as they move slowly and oftentimes latch onto the hands of their keepers. While these creatures may seem static and boring, they can be an extremely interesting conversation piece. Locating a breeder may be difficult, but if you wish to have an exotic animal without the upkeep of some of these others, then the stick insect is a good choice.

I’m just kidding. Just because Mike Tyson had pet tigers doesn’t mean you can.

The line between domesticated and wild animals can be blurred in the exotic pet business. Obviously not every animal will be receptive as a pet. These listed creatures are a perfect balance between the tame and untamed and can make great projects for anyone wishing to branch out from the cat and dog game.

November 22, 2012 • 24

** Submit your TLFs at www.themeliorist.ca. All TLFs must be submitted via a valid uleth e-mail account. Keep in mind that libelous or offensive TLFs may be edited or omitted. The TLFs do not reflect the view or opinions of The Meliorist Publishing Society.

Dear kid in PSYCH 1000-B who comes in late and falls asleep… Wake the fuck up!

To Brock Skretting for compiling and distributing MP3s of our Music 3200 listening list. You’re the best!

Anyone like the Avengers? I have an entire series of Avengers Typography prints for sale.Drop me an email if you are interested: jorinda.becker@uleth.ca

Whoever put up that ‘Oral Fixation Station’ installation on the eighth floor in the art building is a complete genius. I eat a handful of teddy grams every day thanks to you!

Dear Chris the Maintenance Guy,Thanks for being awesome too… We think you so hot. Mwah!D/E1 Girls (:

Dear L word lover! A Marathon would be aaaamazing! Sincerely another L word enthusiast. We should talk!

Art Students keep doing what you do! Your work brightens the stairwell. Also thanks for the cookie!

I am beginning to wonder how many of the desperate, awkward, and vague attempts to meet people through the TLFs actually end well

The boys on uhall D4 closest to the washing machines are total hunks. Stay classy

Dear Liam, you are a handsome devil. Love, all human beings. PS Can you imagine Char with crabs? Awful.

Waterfalls have a lot of majesty and are also majestic. You can hike all day and not see one of these. What a score.

To the three boys always in the grey sweaters, you are oh so sassy Love the two girls that want to throw our panties at youP.S. Work it!

A lot of ants are worker ants. You can tell that they’re working because they lift things that are REAL heavy, sometimes as heavy as humans. How neat is that?

Is the fact my sex-drive is greater than my boyfriend’s grounds to break up with him? – Can’t Get no Satisfaction.

hey owen: SPEAK UP, NO ONE CAN HEAR YOU!sincerely,everyone..

Ah Thursday afternoons, just me and the Meliorist taking up a bathroom stall for a solid hour. I loves me my Thursday turd paper.

JT knows how to sell coffee! Pick the dullest minded conventionally sexy girls so lonely creeps with money can hover. BRILLIANT! They don’t actually want the coffee, just the girls

It must be hard being a beautiful

woman…all you are to most men is a collection of sexy Atoms. A piece of meat to elevate him socially, as if attractiveness means you’re worth it

Dear Chris, the blonde maintenance/garbage guy,YOU have been very clean and awesome this year and I appreciate it!Much love,ULeth students

To those who had to endure the giggly girls in Markin on Monday – our apologies. Just hard to come off that high. Won’t happen again.Sincerely,Not-so-giggly girls.

Dear Chris (garbage/maintenance guy), thanks for fixing what we break. You’re great. -U-hall res.

Hello Sam who I met through the elevator that I was trapped in. Wanna hangout?

There is a dark short haired girl; who has a small red heart tattoo on her chest; it has an X through it. I think you are beautiful and one day someone will check mark that heart.

Yo, smokers that show up at the E1 doors every night. Stop it. Your loud and obnoxiousness at 2am is just what I need when I have 9am classes.Sincerely, Annoyed resident.

Why doesn’t Uleth have a Quidditch team?!

Dear girl with the reddish-blonde hair: You’re basically the only reason I still show up for PHYS 2020.

To the sweet shooting number 11 on the Men’s Basketball Team. Keep shooting those threes, you just might score

Hope to see all you ladies at Mustace Rodeo to celebrate Jared and Nates birthdays on Nov 24th! Double Kegger, $10 entry at the Otherside.

Dear plaid speedo lane swimming on the 16th single?From blonde with glasses

Whoever wrote that article on pan frying a steak had very little idea as to what he was talking about. Using oil instead of butter? Not letting the meat rest before serving? N00b.

To Taxi App: Ever wondered why it takes so long to get a cab? It’s because some people do not take into consideration the weather, that they have no control over, may be a factor

To: Taxi App – Another reason is people call multiple companies and take the first one available, and do not have the courtesy to cancel the other cabs. There’s an App for that too

Taxi App – Not a great idea. Hotels already know numbers of taxi companies. You just have to call them if you don’t know. Afterall, it’s part of customer service on their part, no?

the

meliorist

November 22, 2012 • 25

Students – we realize that you have a lot of stress to unwind on the weekend and need to party. When getting a cab, show a little respect with the driver, and follow rules. Thnx

There were three blondes that helped me get out on Sunday night near the pink elephant apartments. Looked young enough to be students. I fist pumped when I got out. Many thanks!

Taxi App: The app we have for multiple companies showing up at one place? We red flag the place and tend not to go there as often, then what?

To the blonde girl that I stretched beside at around 6:00pm on Saturday. I wish I had taken the time to talk to you, second chance?

K-pop? Not before a little snapple and crackle

To the guy in the green tank top who was behind me in CJs Satur-day night, I’d like to say that you, sir, are extremely attractive. That is all. From the girl in the blue sweater

POST SECRET EVENT FTW. I’d give anything to go to one!!

I’d tender Gertrude Stein’s buttons, if you know what I mean.

according to Williams, when the

plums were eaten, they were delicious, sweet, and cold

I don’t even go here anymore but I miss it and all my friends.. including Eli and Daniel. -TRU Girl

Chivalry is a subtle control mecha-nism created by dominant patriar-chy to disempower women…courtesy should be offered and accepted equally.

Just pictured Joseph as a cuckold, brooding in the corner while the Holy Ghost has his way with Mary. Feel The Lord inside you! Bam!Bam!BAM!

Dear Distracted Guy, on what floor did you see this dark haired girl in the library? Sincerely, also dark haired girl who works at the library.

to the boy in both my 3000 level bio classes this semester. I don’t think you’ve ever noticed me, but you are drool worthy! Too bad you’re way too good for me.

Dear complainer in geography 1000… What else are we supposed to do in that class, learn?Quit sippin on hatorade Love your giggly girls in the left hand corner <3

to the person who wants to meet others who like kpop…I LOVE BIGBANG!! I also like 2NE1, but they are all I know of. I dont understand them, but I love their sound!

To the gamer girl who prefers actions over words and is going to wear some kind of red top to GEEK’s LORD OF THE RINGS MARA-THON in PE 264 on November 24: You’re cute. Coffee?

Want to be a paparazzi for a day and photograph mock celebrities on campus?! You have a chance to win skip the line passes to LCB! Check out http://www.facebook.com/ulethCelebFinder

Accounting Major Tom taking HR you are awesome. Keep it real!

to the girl in soci2200 who occa-sionally sits with me in the back row, come more often

I love myself some Apple Drink. Its the Best.

Dear library girl, I’m sorry about the tlfs. I know I came on strong and stupid. Distracted guy.

Toast to the ticketman who left a note regarding Health Parking Permits! I really appreciate it!Roast to the ticketman who left me a ticket when I was going to get one. Jerk.

To the d-bag who stole my shoes out of the guys change room, I wore them barefoot. Enjoy the athletes foot and plantar warts.

Feminists are like Corn:No nutritional value and in the end all that comes out is shit.A non-feminist female.

short haired girl with dark red dyed hair at the gym on Monday,You are the most beautiful person I have ever laid eyes on. You’re a goddess.-another short haired redhead girl

To the cutie with brown eyes and a broken arm. Now that your arm is no longer in a sling, will you take me up on my offer to dance?

How did Paul make tea?? Hebrewed it! Ahh Christian jokes.

“Yo so ‘dem Crusadin’ foos be all like “Wooo Jesus!” and start goin’ all YOLO on ‘dem Mussi folk who be all liek “Hellz naw sucka!” ‘n start fightin’ back n’ shit, dey be cray yo.”

Random Survey: Legolas or Gimli? On a different topic, yes I did just re-watch the lord of the rings to get ready for the hobbit and am probably far too excited for it…woot?

Dear dirty blonde girl from D4. I enjoyed talking to you at speed dating. would like to continue our conversation since your a rugby player.Boy for D/E 1

the

meliorist

Meliorist Podcasts avalible online at:themeliorist.ca/podcast

Have a pressing topic or question?Send it in to the Meliorist podcast!

p.editor@themeliorist.ca

Here at the ULSU we encourage all students to get involved and clubs are a great opportunity to do

campus and they are always look-ing for new members. I thought I would take this opportunity to list the clubs we have on campus so if any of them spike your interest you can get involved.

1. Accounting Club 2. Afro-Caribbean Association 3. Amnesty International 4. Archaeology Club 5. Art Society 6. Association of Political Science Students 7. Biology Club 8. Bioscience Journal Club 9. Board & Ski Club 10. Calgary Accounting Club 11.Campus Conservative Association 12. Campus Roots Community Garden 13. Canadian Breast Cancer Foundation Youth Advisory Council 14. Canadian Cancer Society Club 15. Canadian Students for a Sensible Drug Policy (CSSDP) 16. Chemistry & Biochemistry Club 17. Chess Club 18. Climbing Club19. Comitatus Latinus 20. Computer Club21. Crocheting & Knitting Club 22. Dance Team23. Economics Students’

Association (ESA) 24. EDGE 25. Education Undergraduate Society 26. Environmental Science Club 27. Finance Club - Calgary28. Freedom House Club 29. French Club30. GEEK Entertainment of Every Kind 31. Geography Club 32. Global Drums33. Hand Game Club 34. Headbangers Society 35. Historical Undergrad Society (THUGS) 36. International Students Association (ISA)37. Inter-Varsity Christian Fellowship 38. JDC West Lethbridge 39. KinPhyEds40. Latter-Day Saint Student Association (LDSSA) 41. Legionaries of Loyola Society 42. Lethbridge JC’s 43. Lethbridge Students for Liberty 44. Lethbridge Students for Life 45. Literature Club 46. Management Students Society (MSS) 47. Mathematics & Physics Club 48. Medieval Club 49. Mixed Curling Club 50. Model United Nations Club 51. Musical Theatre Society (MTS)52. Muslim Students’ Association (MSA) 53. Native American Student Association (NASA) 54. NDP Club55. New Media Students’ Society

56. Nursing Students’ Club (NSC) 57. Object Manipulation Club (OMC) 58. Organization of Residence Students (ORS) 59. Pagan Students Association 60. Philosophy Club61. Pre-Med Club62. Pre-Veterinary Medicine63. PRIDE Centre64. Psychology & Neuroscience Club (PANiC) 65. Public Health Students’ Association 66. Red Cross Club67. Rooted on Campus (ROC) 68. Rotaract Club 69. Singer’s Club 70. Spanish Club71. Students for a Free Tibet72. Surf Club 73. Synthetic Biology Club 74. Theatre Arts Society75. The Unscripted Theatre Society (TUTS) 76. Trolls Rugby Football Club 77. Uleth Student Life78. Ultimate Club 79. VoCal 80. Wind Orchestra Club81. Yoga Club

If you would like more infor-mation regarding clubs please check out our website at www.ulsu.ca. Under the groups tab you

-tact information for all the clubs above. You can also contact me at su.internal@uleth.ca if you have

-mation or if you are interested in starting a club.

Y e a r i n R e v i e w , a n d T h a n k s t o A l l o f Y o u !

Shuna TalbotVP Internal

C a m p u s c l u b s !

Y e a r i n R e v i e w , a n d T h a n k s t o A l l o f Y o u !

Employment Opportunity

The Students’ Union is now accepting applications

for the 2012-2013 academic year. This position is a paid position to commence immediately.The CRO is responsible for all ULSU general elec-tions, by-elections and referenda during the aca-demic year. For more information on the position visit www.ulsu.ca.To apply for this position, please send your resume and cover letter to Cheri Pokarney, ULSU General Manager at su.manager@uleth.ca or drop it off in

Shirts are here! $15eachStop by the Meliorist office (su-166)Tuesday afternoon. Guys and Girls styles!

November 22, 2012 • 30

Jobs, jobs, jobs!Let us introduce you to CES (Career & Employment Services). CES is a student service office dedicated to assisting you with your career and job search needs. We’re within the Career Co-op Services office in AH154, along with Applied Studies and the Management and Arts & Science Cooperative Education programs. CCS office hours are 9 a.m. – 12 p.m. and 1 p.m. – 4 p.m., Monday to Friday.

Go to our website for more detailed information on our services: www.uleth.ca/ross/ces.

Workshops to Dec. 7 (see full schedule and sign up go online to www.uleth.ca/ross/ces/workshops)

CES resume/cover letter workshops:* Friday, Nov. 23, 11 a.m. – 1:30 p.m.* Wednesday, Nov. 28, 3 p.m. – 5:30 p.m.* Thursday, Dec. 6, 9:30 a.m. – 12:00 p.m.

CES interview workshops:* Thursday, Nov. 29, 1:40 p.m. – 4 p.m.

CES how to network with employers workshops:* Thursday, Nov. 22, 11 a.m. – 12 p.m. * Wednesday, Nov. 28, 1 p.m. – 2 p.m.* Tuesday, Dec. 4, 3 p.m. – 4 p.m.

Career planning 101 workshops: what can you do with your major?* Thursday, Nov. 22, 1:40 p.m. – 3:40 p.m.* Monday, Nov. 26, 10 a.m.

– 11:30 a.m.* Wednesday, Dec. 5, 2 p.m. – 4 p.m.

Job search & networking workshops:* Thursday, Nov. 15, 3 p.m. – 5 p.m.* Wednesday, Nov. 21, 3 p.m. – 5 p.m.* Friday, Dec. 7, 11 a.m. – 1:30 p.m.

Visit our website www.uleth.ca/ross/ces to find the CES online job board!

Full time• Management Trainee ~

Guillevin Internation Co (Dec. 31)

• Agribusiness Assistant, Various Locations ~ Richardson International (Nov. 30)

• Addiction/Mental Health Students & New Grads ~ Alberta Health Services (Jan. 2)

• Account Executive, Edm ~ Patron West Equip Finance (Nov. 30)

• Marketing Consultant, Leth ~ Lethbridge Experts & Vintage Media (Nov. 28)

• Registered Nurse, Banff ~ Covenant Health (Nov. 30)

• Office Manager; Executive Assistant, Cgy ~ Alltech (Dec. 31)

• Business Analyst, Leth ~ Lethbridge College (Dec. 1)

• Franchise Manager ~ University First Class Painters (Dec. 31)

• Field Sales Representative, Edm ~ Saint-Gobain Abrasives Canada Inc. (Dec. 2)

• Community Disabilities Services Worker, Leth ~ Peak Vocational & Support Services (Dec. 2)

• Centralized Intake/Referral

Coordinator, Leth ~ Canadian Mental Health (Dec. 19)

• Financial Accountant, Drumheller ~ Canalta (Jan. 1)

• Territory Sales Rep ~ Alltech (Dec. 31)

• Articling Student, Fort McMurray/Estevan/Weyburn ~ MNP (Dec. 5)

• Accounting Manager, Brooks ~ Orion LLP (Dec. 31)

• Accounting Technician, Brooks ~ Orion LLP (Dec. 15)

• Sun Life Financial Advisor ~ Sun Life Financial (Dec. 8)

• Reseller Sales Representative, Edm ~ Daktronics Inc. (Dec. 9)

• Field Sales Representative, Cgy ~ Mondelez International (Dec. 12)

• Centralized Schedule Coordinator, Cgy ~ Boys & Girls Club (Dec. 13)

• Software Developer, Salmon Arm ~ USNR (Nov. 20)

• Sales Representative, Leth ~ Ricoh (Dec. 15)

• Intermediate Reclamation Specialist, Med Hat ~ Tera Environmental (Dec. 15)

• Environmental Planner, Med Hat ~ Tera Environmental (Dec. 15)

• Labour Relations Manager, Edm ~ Professional Association of Resident Physicians of Alberta (Dec. 14)

• Events & Facility Coordinator, Leth ~ SAAG (Nov. 30)

• Manager, International Centre for Students, Leth ~ U of L (Nov. 26)

Temporary• Basketball Officials ~

SABOA (Nov. 29)• Aboriginal

Engagement Facilitator,

Cgy ~ Tera Environmental Consultants (Nov. 30)

• Program Specialist II (Project Position), Cgy ~ U of L (Nov. 23)

• Recruiter, Edm ~ ATCO Electric (Nov. 30)

• EAP Instructor (English for Academic Purposes), Leth ~ U of L (Nov. 26)

• Project Manager, Leth ~ U of L (Nov. 23)

Summer postings• Agribusiness Student,

Various Locations ~ Richardson International (Nov. 30)

• Research Assistant/ Tutor, Deep River/Chalk River ~ Deep River Science Academy (Jan. 30)

• Production Technician, Leth ~ Hytech Production Ltd. (Dec. 15)

• Corporate Office Portfolio Analysis and Modelling, Regina ~ FCC (Nov. 26)

• Credit Management Summer Student, Regina ~ FCC (Nov. 30)

Part time• Field Artillery

Soldier/Officer ~ Canadian Forces (Nov. 30)

• Online Teaching Job ~ Hiknow English (Dec. 31)

• Care Giver, Leth ~ Care.com (Dec. 12)

• Tutor, Leth ~ Tutor Doctor (Dec. 31)

• Youth Support Counsellor, Leth ~ YWCA (Nov. 22)

• FSCD Behavioral/Development Educator, Leth ~ Family Ties (Nov. 30)

• Relief – Youth Support Counsellor, Leth ~ YWCA (Nov. 22)

• Sales Associate, Edm ~

Express (Dec. 15)• Security

Representative, Leth ~ U of L (Nov. 23)

International• English Teacher ~ EF

Changchun (Dec. 31)• Math/Science/English

Teaching Position, England ~ Engage Education Canada (Dec. 31)

• Internships in China ~ InternChina (Dec. 31)

• Teach English in South Korea ~ Avalon English (Dec. 28)

• Assistant Language Teachers and Coordinators of International Relations, Japan ~ JET Programme (Nov. 30)

• English Teacher, Various Locations ~ EF Changchun (Jan. 22)

• Teach English in Japan ~ International Education Services (Dec. 28)

• Youth Ambassador, Ghana ~ Youth Challenge International (Dec. 7)

• Au Pair; Children’s Camps, US ~ Scotia Personnel (Dec. 8)

• Internship in Chinese Wine Company ~ InternChina (Dec. 12)

For details of the postings and information on the application processes, go to www.uleth.ca/ross/ces/job-board.

the

meliorist

Answ

ers Try to find this pronghorn

in this week’s issue of the Meliorist. E-mail the page number and a brief description of where you found it to einc@themeliorist.ca. You will be entered to win our monthly pronghorn draw. You can enter as many times in the month as we publish.

Easy Hard

Please support your campus newspaper

and buy a sweet t-shirt today!

only$15