8/14/2019 The lesson you can teach your children from driving

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The lesson you can teach your children from driving

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By Olufemi Fasanya

Published on 24/10/2009

I learnt how to drive at an age close to my 32nd birthday. I had bashed my car seriously once (it was really

not due to my fault). A commercial bus was discharging its passengers on the expressway when I swerved

to avoid a head-on collision with the truck ahead of me which had suddenly reduced its speed. Inexperience

was the reason for the accident.

I learnt how to drive at an age close to my 32nd birthday. I had bashed my carseriously once (it was really not due to my fault). A commercial bus was dischargingits passengers on the expressway when I swerved to avoid a head-on collision withthe truck ahead of me which had suddenly reduced its speed. Inexperience was thereason for the accident. Thank God that at least, I had the common sense to fastenmy seat belt. The insurance company took care of the damage to the car, but I learntsome vital lessons that fathers can teach their children at the early stage of theirlives.

 There is the need to point out that the law of the country doesn’t permit a minor (achild below the age of 18 years) to drive. This implies that it is only when your childgets to the age of 18 years that the law accepts him or her as having reached theage of accountability. This is the age he or she can be entrusted with certainresponsibilities, including driving a car. I feel that if you have a car and a child that is18 years and above, you should learn to entrust the child with your car. But first, youshould have taught him or her how to drive it. Don’t let your child pick your car’s key

and learn how to do that through a friend or on his own. It can be disastrous whenthey learn it that way.

I know a father who allowed his son to learn how to drive through a member of thelocal church he pastored. But, he allowed the young man to drive him around whenhe was back from school to monitor his driving skill. That is one father I appreciate.He allowed his child to be trained and ensured the young man demonstrated what hehad learnt under his supervision before entrusting him with his car.

I feel that there are vital lessons in life that your child can learn at that age throughpractical guidance by the best teacher in the world - YOU. Here are some of thelessons your child can learn from that experience:

Spontaneous reaction is dangerous.  When your child learns to drive with yourapproval and likely supervision, you can teach him or her a vital lesson in life - that toget trained is a key to success and that doing things on his or her own way isdangerous. People who learn things without guidance always do so the hard way. Letyour child know that you can only trust him or her with vital issues of life if he or heris obedient to instructions you give. If he or she will not consistently obey trafficrules, then, such a can’t be trusted with your car.

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Life is governed by rules and not by spontaneous reactions. When your childunderstands the role of rules in safeguarding his or her life, that child will invariablylearn that success in life is tied to obeying rules than reacting to circumstances.

 To be slow and steady in one’s endeavour may not sound good, but it’s the best. In aworld where people are always on the move, a father needs to get this lesson

through. Most children of today have imbibed a culture that I consider dangerous -that everything must be achieved at a jet speed. They want to be rich, get married,be successful via a fire brigade approach. The reality is that life isn’t like that.

When he or she is allowed to drive at a consistent speed, a father can teach his childthat it may take time to get to their destination, but that it is better for them to getthere safely. Any major auto accident in which the driver loses control is caused byoverspeeding. Your child can be taught that people who don’t go through dueprocess won’t leave a lasting legacy behind.

His or her future is tied to knowing how to handle people - When you teach him orher how to drive, let him or her know that his or her actions will affect people aroundhim or her. The effect of the actions of other people, however, can be minimised if he

or she learns not to react but act wisely. The side mirrors and the inner one areplaced there so that the driver can observe at a glance the action of others and makedeductions from them before taking actions. The ability to read the actions of otherdrivers on your mirrors will determine if there will be an accident or not.

Also, he or she should be taught that reacting in a similar manner to another person’saction is usually not wise. He or she should learn to know when to allow a sleepingdog lie and when to react to situations that are not right.

 There is always a blind spot in life. Every driver would have discovered that there is ablind spot where his or her mirrors can’t spot an oncoming vehicle until the driverhits on his or her horn.

So, from driving, a father can teach his child not to be over-confident in life. He orshe needs to learn to acknowledge God who sees beyond what his or her naturaleyes cannot see irrespective of what height he or she has attained in life.

Decision determines destination. At a point when your child can move the car wellenough, sit at the back (where we call in this side of the world, the owner’s corner);ask him or her what position he or she would like to occupy in life - the owner of thecar or the driver. Let your child see the need to be responsible by making the rightdecisions in life.

When he or she can drive well enough, leave a standing order that he or she shouldnot use your car without your permission; that if he or she wants to be a fine boy or

babe, that child should go and work to get his or her own car.

Femi Fasanya can be contacted on 08037257479

www.relationship-daddy.blogspot.com