The Compassionate Friends July 2011.pdf · July 2011 The Compassionate friends • Northern...

The Compassionate Friends

Northern Virginia and DC Chapters

Arlington, Fairfax, Leesburg, Prince William,

Reston, Virginia and Washington, DC

VOLUME 20 , NO. 5 JULY 2011

The mission of The Compassionate Friends is to assist families in the positive resolution of

grief following the death of a child and to provide information to help others be supportive.

TCF National Conference

July 15-17, 2011

Minneapolis/St. Paul, Minnesota Compassionate Friends national conferences have always been a great healing experience for bereaved families and TCF’s 34th National Conference, to be held July 15-17, 2011, in Minneapolis/St. Paul, Minnesota, will be no exception. Pre-conference registration ended June 24. If you are unable to attend, you will still have the opportunity to purchase recordings of workshop sessions and DVDs of keynote speakers after the conference. If you are attending, please note that the Sheraton Bloomington-Minneapolis South will become the Doubletree Bloomington-Minneapolis South the same week as the start of the conference.

Bereaved Parents of the USA 2011 National Gathering

This event will be held July 28-31 in Reston, VA at the Sheraton Reston Hotel near Dulles International Airport. For additional information, go to www.bereavedparentsusa.org.

Combined Summer Issue

The August & September issues of this newsletter will be combined. Material for both of those months (articles, poems, tributes, etc.) needs to be provided to your chapter reporter in July.

The Shrine Down the Hall

In 2010, the New York Times published a photo

essay by Ashley Gilbertson which memorialized the

lives of young soldiers lost in the war in Iraq. It is

incredibly powerful and moving. Gilbertson

followed the Faces of the Fallen regularly printed in

the Washington Post and contacted families of those

who died. He visited their homes and took

photographs of the soldiers’ bedrooms, some

preserved for many years. This award winning photo

essay features 19 bedrooms and is titled “Bedrooms

of the Fallen”. You may view his photographs on:

http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2010/03/21/

magazine/20100321-soliders-bedrooms-

slideshow.html

Inside this issue:

Calendar and Contacts 2

Arlington Chapter 3

Fairfax Chapter 4

Leesburg Chapter 5

Prince William Chapter 6

Reston Chapter 7

Washington, DC Chapter 9

Resources and Information 8

Our Children Remembered 10

http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2010/03/21/magazine/20100321-soliders-bedrooms-slideshow.html



The Compassionate friends • Northern Virginia and DC July 2011

JULY 2011 MEETINGS

July 6 (first Wednesdays)

7:30 PM Fairfax Chapter

7:30 PM Leesburg Chapter

July 14 (second Thursdays)

7:30 PM Arlington Chapter

July 9 (second Saturdays)

2-4 PM TCF Reston

July 20 (third Wednesdays)

7-9 PM Washington DC Chapter

July 21 (third Thursdays)

7:30 PM Prince William Chapter

Arlington Chapter

Contact: Lois Copeland

(301) 530-1115

[email protected]

Trinity Presbyterian Church

5533 N.16th St

Arlington, VA

Second Thursdays 7:30 PM

Please send

“Love Gifts” to:

Kent Womack

1013 Riverside Dr.

Woodstock, VA 22664

Fairfax Chapter

Contact: Carol Marino

[email protected]

or Diane Burakow

[email protected]

Chapter Phone:

(703) 622-3639

OLD ST.MARY’S HALL,

next to St. Mary’s Historic

Church and Cemetery

Fairfax Station Rd

and Route 123

Fairfax, VA 22030

First Wednesdays 7:30 PM

Please send


Monica Clark

5444 Ladue Lane

Fairfax, VA 22030

Attn: TCF

Leesburg Chapter

Contact: Bev or Bernie Elero

(540) 882-9707

St. James Episcopal Church

Janney Parlor

14 Cornwall St NW

Leesburg, VA

First Wednesdays 7:30 PM

Please send


Mrs.Anne Shattuck

224 Walnut Ridge Ln.

Palmyra, VA 22963

Prince William

Chapter

Contact: Ken Adams

(703) 361-6574

[email protected]

Grace United Methodist Church

Library, 2nd Floor

9750 Wellington Rd

Manassas, VA

Third Thursdays 7:30 PM

Please send


Melody Ridgeway

9366 Dahlia Ct.

Manassas, VA 20110

TCF Reston (for no surviving children)

Contact:

Nancy Vollmer (VA)

(703) 860-8587

Sharon Skarzynski (MD)

(410) 757-5049

North County Gov Bld.

Reston Police Station Bld.

12000 Bowman Towne Drive

Reston, VA

Second Saturdays 2-4 PM

(for no surviving children)

Washington, DC

Chapter

Contact: Olivia Gunter

(301) 552-2798

The Howard University

The Blackburn Center

2397 Sixth Street, NW

Washington, DC 20059

Third Wednesdays 7-9 PM

Please send


Coralease Ruff

3314 Applegrove Ct.

Oak Hill, VA 20171

NEWSLETTER TEAM

Editor

Peggi Johnson

[email protected]

Database Manager

Brenda Sullivan

[email protected]

Treasurer

Kent Womack

1013 Riverside Drive

Woodstock, VA 22664

[email protected]

Reporters

Arlington

Lois Copeland

[email protected]

Fairfax

Katy Frank, [email protected]

District of Columbia

Michelle Lake, [email protected]

Leesburg

Bev Elero

[email protected]

Prince William

Jennifer Clark

[email protected]

Reston

Kathy Grapski, [email protected]

Regional Coordinator

Kathy Collins

[email protected]

4505 Rachael Manor Drive

Fairfax, VA 22032

TCF National Headquarters

PO Box 3696

Oak Brook IL 60522-3696 http://www.compassionatefriends.org

(877) 969-0010 (Toll-Free)

Arlington Website

http://www.tcfarlington.org

Webmaster: Mary M.Bell

[email protected]

Fairfax Website

www.tcffairfax.org

Leesburg Website

http://www.tcfleesburg.org

[email protected]

Prince William Website

http://www.tcfprincewilliam.org

[email protected]

mailto:[email protected]




Vacations

Vacation time is upon us again. You may be having trouble with

that very thought, especially if you are recently bereaved. Large

places with many people many not be the answer, small places

with few people may not feel right or family-oriented locations

may bring painful reminders of years past. No vacation may be

an option.

Whatever you choose to do this summer, try to plan ahead.

Hope the sun warms the heart and brings reminders of some

happy memories.

~Lois Copeland, TCF, Arlington, VA

Summertime and the livin is easy…

The lazy, hazy days of summer…

What does summertime bring to your mind? I think of the beach

with the waves softly washing ashore. Walking along with the

sand between my toes. Finding “treasure” along the shoreline.

The sound of the ocean is calming. The sun is warm on my face.

Life seems good.

And then I realize that being at the beach is forever changed for

me. The memories of times past at the beach with my family

come flooding back. Lots of good memories.

I stare at the ocean and think…the ocean is like my grief.

Sometimes it seems wild and black with rage and almost

impossible to manage. Riptides, currents and storm surges.

Sometimes it’s like rough waves hitting the shore, continually

pounding. And sometimes the waves are smaller and are

enjoyable to play in. Then sometimes it is unusually calm and I

can wade in and let the cool water surround me.

So now I go to the beach to remember. And let the sun warm my

heart. Let the sound of the waves calm my soul. And get sand

between my toes. ~Carol Tomaszewski, Annapolis Chapter, BP/USA

An Accident

It was just an accident, a senseless stupid accident.

But I need someone to blame,

Somewhere to direct my anger,

Somewhere where it won’t

Bounce right back to me.

Someone to take all of my attention,

Someone to hold accountable,

Someone else to think about,

So I don’t think about you dying

About you being dead, when all it was

Was a senseless stupid accident

That took you from me.

In memory of my son, Shawn and my sister, Rhonda ~Deb Kostner, TCF, Oshkosh, WI~

FOR SIBLINGS…

Mark

Some people dread the holidays; others anniversaries or

birthdays. With me, it’s not just these days,

but spring and summer. From the first talk of

spring training to the last out of the World

Series, I MISS YOU. Baseball was such a big

part of your life. I see you in a baseball

uniform in so many of my memories. How I

wish we could catch a Royal’s game

together! Remember, they were World Champions in ’85!

I know that you have rounded third and slid in home, but that

doesn’t ease the pain in my heart. I love you so much!

~Tamala Lauffer, TCF Independence, MO

The August and September newsletters will be combined and

published at the end of July. Please send me any stories or

poems by July 10. If you want to make a love gift donation,

please have it to Kent Womack by the first week of July.

Welcome It is so hard to “welcome” family members to our meetings for the first time because we are so very

sorry for the reason you are here. Even if it was sad or painful to attend our meeting, please come again. It

will get easier.

Joe Cecil, lost his son Benjamin (Jamie), November 2010.

Shannon Malveaux and Jordon Malaveaux lost her

daughter and his sister,and Wellington Coddington, his girlfriend, Brittany, April 2011.

***WANTED: A volunteer to do the Arlington

Page of the newsletter. No experience necessary.

Call or email Lois Copeland for information.

301-520-0225 or [email protected]


Welcome to our new members We welcome our new families with open arms:

Brad and Sherri Newman

of Herndon, VA, parents of Joshua Newman

Melinda and Carlos Santiago

of Fairfax, VA, parents of Michael Santiago

Shannon Malveaux and Jordan Malveaux

of Leesburg, VA, mother and brother of Brittany

Malveaux

Tiny Angels

Tiny Angels rest your wings

sit with me for awhile.

How I long to hold your hand,

And see your tender smile.

Tiny Angel, look at me,

I want this image clear....

That I will forget your precious face

Is my biggest fear.

Tiny Angel can you tell me,

Why you have gone away?

You weren't here for very long....

Why is it, you couldn't stay?

Tiny Angel shook his head,

"These things I do not know....

But I do know that you love me,

And that I love you so".

A Penny

I found a penny today

Just lying on the ground,

But it's not just a penny

This little coin I've found.

Found pennies come from heaven

That's what my Grandpa told me,

He said Angels toss them down

Oh, how I loved that story.

He said when an Angel misses you

They toss a penny down,

Sometimes just to cheer you up

To make a smile out of your frown.

So don't pass by that penny

When you're feeling blue,

It may be a penny from heaven

That an Angel's tossed to you.

Vacations

Vacation time can be painful for bereaved parents. Caught up with normal demands of making a living or keeping a household going, we have less time to think than we do on vacations, especially the "take it easy" kind-at a hideaway, tucked away somewhere.

In the summers following Tricia's death, I found vacations could bring a special kind of pain. We avoided going to places where we had vacationed with her. At one time, I thought Williamsburg might be off my list forever since we had a very happy time together there. I tried it one summer three years later and found that she walked the cobbled streets with me. Now that nine years have passed and the pain has eased, maybe the happy memories we shared in Williamsburg can heighten the pleasure of another visit there.

For the first few years after Tricia's death, we found fast-paced vacations at places we had never been before, to be the best. The stimulation of new experiences in new places with new people refreshed us and sent us home more ready to pick up our grief work. That is not to say when we did something or saw something that Tricia would have enjoyed, we didn't mention her. We did, but it seemed less painful than at home.

One caution: Do allow enough time for sleep; otherwise, an exhausted body can depress you.

We've said it many times: YOU HAVE TO FIND YOUR OWN WAY, YOUR OWN PEACE. Let vacation time be another try at that; but do give yourself a break in choosing the time and locale where that can best be accomplished. Don't be afraid of change-it can help with your re-evaluation of life.

~Elizabeth Estes, TCF Augusta. GA, in memory of

Tricia


The Many Lessons You Taught Us By Susan M. Cleveland, Leesburg, VA TCF (Mother of Christopher Michael Cleveland Sept 15 - June 24)

The first lesson was about love. I saw this love when you were small and I kissed your boo-boos to make them all better. I find this love in your emails you sent to us during your travels and throughout the journals you wrote during your life. I see this love through the tributes your friends and family posted on www.chriscleveland.info<http://www.chriscleveland.info/>;. Without this love we would not feel the pain of grief and the emptiness in our hearts when you left us.

The second lesson you taught us was courage. Each day you showed courage in your quest to regain your strength, and your sense of balance so you could travel and live on your own again. You gave me the courage to try new things like returning to college to start a new career to become a teacher.

The third lesson you taught us was patience. Through this lesson of patience I have I found the gift to work with children with special needs and adults with disabilities. With patience and a slower pace, tasks and goals can be accomplished and dreams can be fulfilled.

The fourth lesson you taught was to feel joy. I see your joy in your smile and not just in your photographs. I feel joy when I see rainbows and butterflies because like you rainbows and butterflies are only here for a short time. I feel joy and see your smile in each sunrise and every sunset.

The fifth lesson you taught us was about generosity. To honor your generosity we established the Christopher Cleveland Memorial Fund to inspire further research for balance disorders, epilepsy, alopecia, and learning disabilities. You taught us that kindness towards others is more important than money or material possessions. Thank you for these lessons, I have learned to treasure each new day, Love Always, Mom

To Adam Steven Katz

Bombarded with reminders of you, dear son, sweet and sorrowful bound into one. A promising future gone in a flash, the moment you died in a violent crash. Existing without you is torturous to bear, your untimely death so dreadful and unfair. We’re trying to adapt to an altered life, while emptiness and craving you brings daily strife. We mourn, we honor, we do normal things, praying your spirit in the afterlife takes wings to envelop us in love and protection, ensuring we keep our eternal connection. Forever grateful to have reared our sunshine boy, you illuminated this earth with goodness and joy. With everlasting love and respect, Mom Linda Katz, Leesburg VA, TCF

Give Me The Vision

Shall I cry out in anger, O God, Because Thy gifts are mine but for a while?

Shall I be ungrateful for the moments of laughter,

The seasons of joy, the days of gladness and festivity, When tears cloud my eyes and darken the world

And my heart is heavy within me?

Shall I blot from mind the love I have known and in which I have rejoiced

When a fate beyond my understanding takes from me Friends and kin whom I have cherished, and leaves me

Bereft of shining presences that have lit my way Through the years of companionship and affection?

Give me the vision, O God, to see and feel That imbedded deep in each of Thy gifts

Is a core of eternity that survives the dread hours Of affliction and misery.

Those I have loved, though now beyond my view,

Have given form and quality to my being. They have led me into the wide universe I continue to

inhabit, and their presence is more vital to me than their absence.

What Thou givest, O Lord, Thou takest not away,

And bounties once granted shed their radiance evermore.

Rabbi Morris Adler, Reprinted with Permission, Solace Newsletter

“…there is no more ridiculous custom than the one that makes you express sympathy once and for all on a given day to a person whose sorrow will endure as long as his life. Such grief, felt in such a way, is always “present,” it is never too late to talk about it, never repetitious to mention it again.”

~~Marcel Proust~~

http://www.chriscleveland.info/

http://www.chriscleveland.info/%3e


Don’t Think I Do Not Grieve

Don’t think I do not feel;

because you see no tears.

A river rages deep inside

of grief, and loss, and fears.

Just because I do not cry now,

don’t think my heart’s not broken.

I keep inside the misery

of words not to be spoken.

Sometimes I smile, or crack a joke,

so you won’t see the pain;

or notice how my hands will shake,

or how I’ve gone insane.

Each time I chance to think of her,

my heart is ripped asunder.

The loss I feel is mine alone.

you will not see my thunder.

~Brenda Penepent

Drifting…….

Drifting through life is how I feel

The death of my son, doesn’t seem real.

I catch myself laughing the next moment I cry.

I try to quote reason, but my mouth spills out

“Why?”

I stare at his photo, now spotted with tears.

More distance from him is one of my fears.

My beautiful boy – his life became shorter.

Why couldn’t I go first? – That’s the right

order!

So I’ll continue to drift along life’s falling

rain,

until the day when our hearts meet again.

~ Kelly Boerger, TCF Cincinnati

Butterflies & Rainbows

You came to me on a Butterfly’s

wing, so very long ago.

What God had in his plans for us

how could we possibly know?

I watched you laugh and play and

dream as you grew into a man.

How beautiful you were to me, as you

chased rainbows in the sand.

It’s incomprehensible to think

that you have gone away.

And you won’t be coming back again,

not even for a day.

Two years have come and gone since

then and the sun still rises in the sky.

Butterflies and rainbows still exist,

and I have stopped asking why.

Your light shines brightly in my heart

and always will my dear.

You are with the rainbows there

and I’m with the butterflies here.

~ Robyn Bell – TCF, Valley Forge, PA

MEMORIES

Memories are flowers

growing in the heart.

Flowers picked on

happy days that time

arranges in bouquets to warm the heart in tender ways by

feelings they impart.

Memories are pictures taken through the years, pictures of

a smiling face, a happy time, a favorite place.

These pleasures, time cannot erase, they are kept as

souvenirs.

~Laura Rogers, TCF Northfield, NJ


The summer heat has arrived. Many of us have a little more

time in the summer as things slow down, I thought these articles

might be good ones to read and think about. Wishing you a

restful summer.

Kathy Grapski

“COMMON SENSE” GRIEF RULES

In my work as a bereavement counselor for a number of funeral

homes, I contact family members of the deceased approximately

eight weeks after the death. The largest percentage of them are

what I call “I’m fine” calls. Surviving members tell me they’re

“fine.” In truth, many of them are, but many of them are not.

I hear comments such as, “I’m keeping busy so I don’t have time

to think about it” or “I hurt at first, but I just have to give it

time.” Or, “I try not to cry in front of my family. It upsets them

so much.” Few people will admit that they are hurting.

Unfortunately, this denial of grief is all too common in our

society. Actually, we have unwritten rules about it. They

are: Bury your feelings, replace the loss, grieve alone and give

it time. Did you pick up any of these rules in the above

comments?

We live in a fast-paced society that doesn’t allow the deep,

searing emotions that occur at the death of a special loved, one,

especially the death of a child. It’s not comfortable to listen to

another talk about his/her child, or cry, or show pictures of him

or her. We’ve got to “get on with life.” Thus,

the“rules.”

As bereaved parents we pay a high price for those rules. We pay

the price for swallowing our emotions in illness and chronic

depression that can plague us many years after our child

dies. We pay the price in self-blame when that magic year mark

comes and we aren’t “over” it.

We never stop and ask ourselves, who said we have to keep

busy, that crying is weakness, that talking about our deceased

child is morbid, that we must think only of the good memories,

or that time heals all wounds? We just take societal dictates as

truths. They are not!!

Ignore these “rules.” Let yourself grieve in healthy ways. Don’t

bury your feelings. Let them out. Get angry when you need

to. Cry when you hurt. Talk out your guilt. Don’t try to replace

the uniqueness of your child. You can’t. Don’t grieve

alone. Find people who will listen non-judgmentally to your

story told over and over again. Let go of the mistaken idea that

time heals. It isn’t time that heals, it’s the grief work you do

while the clock ticks away that heals.

Look at what you’re being told about grief. Question who they

are, what they think they know about grief. Don’t listen to those

who tell you not to grieve. Would you consult your neighbor on

financial matters if he were a mechanic? Would you ask an

attorney about your stomach problems? Of course, you

wouldn’t, so why listen to those who tell you how to grieve

when they have absolutely no knowledge of how to grieve or

how to recover if they’ve not walked this path.

The loss of a beloved child creates big changes in your

life. Don’t leave healthy recovery and positive personal growth

to “common sense” rules. Keep in mind that while the rules

may be “common” they don’t make sense.

~Margaret Gerner, Bereaved Parent

~Submitted in Loving Memory of Lisa Champlin by

her Mom, Linda Nielsen, Reston TCF

SUMMER THOUGHTS

Summer is a time when things naturally slow down, a time when many are waiting for the orderly routine of their lives to begin again. For those of us in grief whose lives are already in limbo, it can seem endless if we let it. Seeing children, babies and teenagers is not easy for us, and we see them everywhere from shopping centers to beaches. Everyone is out living, loving, enjoying carefree activities with their children, and we want to scream, “It’s not fair!” I was sitting on my patio on evening at dusk recently listing to the shouts of children playing, and I was crying as I remembered the sounds that my child used to make. I became very depressed as I thought what a long summer this was going to be.

In my reverie, I was reminded of a recent comment that I had heard at a TCF meeting: “My child was such a loving, giving person. He would not want me

(Continued on page 9)

If you would like to put a poem or article on this

page, contact Kathy Grapski ([email protected]

or 301-253-5509) Deadline for August and

September submissions is July 10th.


JULY

Fireworks lighting the night in thundering array

Fireflies and butterflies on the air do play.

Squeaky chain on the old back porch swing

The chirping of crickets and frogs as they sing.

Watermelon in sweet juicy red

Summer vacations, sleeping in Grandma’s bed.

Long days filled with carefree play

Corn on the cob, the sweet scent of hay.

Sun-browned from swimming and fishing down at the

Lake

Dairy Queen Sundaes and thick milkshakes.

Family reunions, with family and food all around

Spreading a blanket out on the ground.

Warm rain fills puddles, inviting to splash with barefoot

feet

But my Birthday is by far the best July treat!

But if this is the month I should leave

Remember these things when your heart grieves.

Look at the beauty that fills this time

And remember forever our hearts are entwined.

~Sheila Simmons, TCF Atlanta, GA

For Siblings………..

FOREVER JOURNEY

It was us against the world! At least that’s the way we

figured it. We were destined to conquer any obstacle that

would jeopardize our future. Together we were fearless, to

be apart was not an option. We were to remain intact until

we reigned victorious over our journey with life. Little did

I know our journey would soon be postponed. During the

twelfth year of our journey, we were set apart.

Mike had completed his journey with life, and was taken to

a place he would reign victorious. Our life together was a

chapter, my memories much more than a story. We are

bonded together by a LOVE that stretches beyond that of

human comprehension. A LOVE that only we can reveal,

in a place where it will always be and forever remain; in

my heart.

Daniel Warford, TCF, Lakes Area, MI

Welcome to our New Members:

Corey and Kenann

Surviving

There’s no way to know,

in those first, early years,

if the crying will stop,

be an ending to tears.

But slowly, so slowly,

through the grieving and time,

will come moments and days,

when hopefulness shines.

Backwards and forwards,

into darkness, then out,

we begin to start living;

scraps of new life peek out.

This happens most surely,

survivors will tell,

when we find time for others

and give of ourselves.

~Genesse Bourdeau Gentry

STARS IN THE DEEPEST NIGHT, 1999


to waste my life being bitter.” “I also remember a good friend telling me to “count my blessings” and naming all the things I had to be grateful for. I was furious at that time. Nothing I had to be grateful for could compensate for the fact that my child had died. Now, sitting in the twilight of this early summer evening, I began to see things differently. I determined that this summer would not be an eternity: I would not let it be. I decided first of all to stay busy.

I am also going to try to enjoy the simple things that used to give me so much pleasure, like flowers, and working in my garden. I then decided to try to be truly grateful for the blessings that I have, like my husband, my friends, my job etc.

It has been almost 5 years for me, and I know that last year this would not have worked. Of course I still have times of sadness; I know I always will. But I have decided that in the process of grieving we close so many doors, the only way to recovery is to reopen them gradually at our own pace.

I know I will never be the same person I was before the death of my child, but I hope eventually in some ways I will be a better person because suffering can be beneficial if we learn and grow through it. A year ago I didn’t feel that way, and I know I still have a long way to go, but in the meantime, I know the greatest tribute to my child will be to enjoy this summer as he would have done.

~Libby Gonzales, TCF Huntsville, AL

Resources and Information

The Compassionate Friends

home page: www.compassionatefriends.org

home page links:

Facebook

Twitter

Chat rooms

877-969-0010

Survivors of Suicide

www.suivivorsofsuicide.com

American Foundation for Suicide Prevention

www.afsp.org

888-333-2377

Parents of Murdered Children

[email protected]

888-818-7662

Haven of Northern Virginia

www.havenofnova.org

703-941-7000

CrisisLink

www.crisislink.org

703-527-4077

SHARE (pregnancy & infant loss support)

www.nationalshareoffice.com

800-821-6819

MISS Foundation (miscarriage, stillborns, infant loss

support) www.missfoundation.org.

local chapter: www.dcmissfoundaton.org

703-728-8446 Roberta Quirk

Washington Regional Transplant Community

www.beadonor.org

703-641-0100

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

800-273-8255 (TALK)

(Continued from page 7)

From the Editor:

While I am aware of the many ways profound grief can

take shape, I did not realize until the past few months that

a crisis of confidence can be created. A serious crisis. A

questioning of everything you thought you had learned or

mastered or had come to understand. No longer am I

confident of my beliefs, my values, my view of the

world. I am unsure of my decisions and my actions. I

worry that I am no longer capable of maintaining healthy

and honest relationships. Once upon a time, I felt that I

had grown: through experience and mistakes and

sometimes through accomplishment, hard work and

discipline. While I have never seen myself as naturally

insightful, I believed I had acquired some wisdom, some

ability to navigate through the world. But now I relate

more to Sgt. Schultz of the Hogan’s Heroes TV show: “I

know nothing.” If I offer an opinion, it is offered more

tentatively. So, add loss of confidence to the pile of

losses. Add it on.

~Peggi Johnson

http://www.compassionatefriends.org

http://www.afsp.org

http://[email protected]

http://www.havenofnova.org

http://www.crisislink.org

http://www.nationalshareoffice.com

http://www.missfoundation.org

http://www.dcmissfoundaton.org

http://www.beadonor.org


Matthew Rand Robert Gaber July 2 Cathy Gaber Prince William

Renard Anthony Harris July 2 Pamela Williams-Walker DC

Adam Seymour July 2 Beverly and Jim Seymour Fairfax

Peter M. DeGrazia July 3 John and Corrine DeGrazia Prince William

Elizabeth Gibson July 4 Joanne Gibson Arlington

Brad Hampton July 4 Beth Hampton Arlington

Christopher Buro July 5 Kathy and Ronald Brandel Fairfax

Nicholas Freeman July 5 Cecelia Freeman Fairfax

Matthew Harrington Hale July 6 Susanne Hale Leesburg

Michael Santiago July 6 Melinda and Carlos Santiago Fairfax

Nancy Kathleen "Kate" Hagopian July 8 Dave and Mary Hagopian Arlington

Jarrod Weston July 10 Meggan Strasbaugh Fairfax

Samuel Jermaine Blanks July 11 Samuel and Betty Blanks DC

John David Lindsay July 12 Elizabeth Lindsay Arlington

Marc Gordon Thomas July 12 Gordon and Barbel Thomas Arlington

Michael Durgala July 14 Mary Durgala Fairfax

Joshua Butler July 16 David Butler Fairfax

David Yoo July 16 Karen Yoo Arlington

Silecia Darlington July 17 Jean Darlington DC

Daniel Joseph Pawlak July 17 Debbie and Joe Pawlak Reston

Ryan Lopynski July 18 Jeremy Lopynski Fairfax

Jennifer Rebecca Toler July 18 Carol Brinegar Prince William

Sarah Renee Carter July 19 Susan Carter Fairfax

Andrew O'Brien July 19 Missy O'Brien Prince William

Paige Mackenzie Johnson July 20 Kay and Roger Lavallee, Trish and

David Stoskus, Matt Johnson Leesburg/Fairfax

Shey Allen July 21 Darcel and Josh Allen Fairfax

Sean Campbell July 21 Donald and Madelyn Campbell Arlington

Eirik Jon Jespersen July 22 Nils and Beth Jespersen Leesburg

Patricia Lynn "Patti" Schmid July 22 Stuart and Sharon Schmid Arlington

Todd Coder July 23 Courtney and Josh Coder,

Cheryl and Tony Coder Fairfax

Adam Christopher Smoot July 23 Lynn Burwitz Prince William

Christopher Michael Diegelmann July 26 Denise and Mike Diegelmann Reston

Will Foreman July 27 Louise and Mark Foreman Fairfax

Patrick Donoghue July 28 Shannon Donoghue Arlington

Klara Morgan Knight July 28 Ken Knight Prince William

Korri Summer Duffield July 29 Troy and Samantha Duffield Prince William

Mario St. George Boiardi July 30 Deborah and Mario Boiardi Arlington

Jason Clover July 30 Cheryl Clover Fairfax

David Evans Hobson July 31 Anne Shattuck Leesburg

Brandon Perle July 31 Patricia and Michael Perle Fairfax

Daniel Selmonosky July 31 Sonia and Carlos Selmomosky Arlington


Ryan Marie Boykin July 1 Julia and Bruce Boykin

June Barry Arlington/Fairfax

Alyssia Cage July 1 Carol Moran Fairfax

Lynn Stephanie Densen July 1 Betty Densen Reston

Douglas Wayne Hosier July 2 Wayne and June Hosier Arlington

Camarie Glover July 3 Sharonda Glover Fairfax

Amanda Harpin July 3 Paul and Martha Harpin Fairfax

Brandon Perle July 3 Patricia and Michael Perle Fairfax

Renee Parkinson July 4 Natalie Parkinson Leesburg

Suhail "Sid" Chowdhury July 6 Anwar and Patricia Chowdhury Prince William

Matthew Coffelt July 7 Debbie Coffelt Leesburg

Danny Frank July 7 Nancy and Mike Frank Fairfax

Eirik Jon Jespersen July 8 Nils and Beth Jespersen Leesburg

Matthew Sean Clem July 9 Suzann Clem Leesburg

Cody DuWayne Pollard July 9 Andrea Pollard Prince William

Sevi Suerdem July 10 Demet and Taclan Suerdem Reston

Eric Alexander Jones July 13 Patty and Ralph Jones Reston

Erin Stanfield July 14 Jack and Susan Stanfield Fairfax

Patrick Ryan Gay July 15 Pam and Tom Gay Prince William

Robert Whiddon July 17 Donna and Robert St. Pierre Leesburg

Maxwell Harmon July 19 Rana and William Harmon Arlington

Kasey Haynes July 20 Elizabeth DiCristifaro Fairfax

Claire Alexis Sachse July 20 Kathleen and Brett Sachse Fairfax

Greg Snellings July 21 Kristen Snellings Fairfax

Trevor Stokol July 22 C. Jodi Stokol Arlington

David Patricio Castro July 23 Patricio and Clementina Castro Fairfax

Patrick Donoghue July 23 Shannon Donoghue Arlington

Holt Weeks July 23 Linton and Jan Taylor Weeks Fairfax

Stone Weeks July 23 Linton and Jan Taylor Weeks Fairfax

Jennifer Coyne July 24 Julie and Burton Simonds Leesburg

Angela Gardner July 24 Liz and Gerry Gardner Fairfax

Eric Monday July 26 Penny Rossi Fairfax

Darnell Smith Jr. July 26 Tanya Smith DC

Mark Robert Fracasso Jr. July 27 Michele and Mark Fracasso Fairfax

Klara Morgan Knight July 28 Ken Knight Prince William

Nancy Kathleen Hagopian July 29 Dave and Mary Hagopian Arlington

Alex Leonard July 29 Liz Kestler Fairfax

Marc Gordon Thomas July 29 Gordon and Barbel Thomas Arlington

LaShaun Maria Parker July 30 Lori and Barbara Parker DC

If there are any errors or omissions in the two Our Children Remembered pages,

please contact your local chapter leadership so our data bases can be corrected.

NONPROFIT ORG

U.S.POSTAGE

PAID

ARLINGTON, VA

PERMIT NO.348

Compassionate Friends Trinity Presbyterian Church 5533 North 16th Street Arlington, VA 22205

Address Service Requested

July 2011July 2011

“Grief and sadness knits two hearts in closer bonds than

happiness ever can; and common sufferings are far stronger

than common joys.”

-Alphonse de Lamartine

The Compassionate Friends July 2011.pdf · July 2011 The Compassionate friends • Northern...

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Transcript of The Compassionate Friends July 2011.pdf · July 2011 The Compassionate friends • Northern...