The balancing of all parts of the self to create a dynamic and harmonious order.

Issues we struggle withFinding ourselves lovableBalancing the various parts of ourselves

into a unified orderFreeing ourselves of “hooks”Learning the self-restraint that allows us

to set directions for ourselves and passionately invest ourselves in something worthwhile

5 Dimensions of our person

Physical (biological)Rational (Intellectual)Emotional (feeling)SocialSpiritual

3 Significant Qualities of WholenessFreedomUnity, order and directionSelf-restraint

What is FreedomThe joy of being “unhooked”Freedom is when we are not in the “grip”

of something or someone, rather we are in charge of ourselves.

What is “hooked”AddictedSelf deception – to deceive oneself about

the rightness or wrongness of certain choices.Necessary skill for being hookedA great obstacle to true freedom

Short term pleasuresThose things that seem to make us feel

better at the time.Casual sex, new clothes, drugs, work, TV,

etc.These things only work for a short time,

then the good feeling wears off.

AddictionsAlcoholDrugsSexPerfect bodyGamblingChronic over spendingShopping

SEXChristian Understanding: Sex

Sexuality is a wonderful gift from God, intended to give us pleasure and happiness as we unite with another person.

What it is meant for: our happiness and enjoyment in a

committed, lasting relationship (marriage).

Why Casual Sex?Wanting to feel high, desired, adultWishing to escape problemsGetting away from boredomBeing curiousWant to brag to friends Low self-esteem

Some results of casual sexSTD’s

Gonorrhea SyphilisGenital herpesAIDS

Unwanted pregnancyUnstable familyForever becomes No more ever

Long term pleasuresBeing true to yourselfLoving relationshipsCreating and appreciating beautyInvesting yourself in a challengeContributing your talentLearning a new skillHelping others grow

How to become “unhooked”You need honesty and discipline to make the

decision to get the necessary help to become unhooked.

HonestyBe honest with yourself about:

Being hooked Why you’re hooked

DisciplineHave the discipline to continue to make the

right decisions

A Person is not a “war zone”This means…

Being unified within oneself The body, mind, emotions & spirit

Having unity, order and direction Knowing your own boundaries Being in touch with your own needs Having peace within yourself

Finding yourself acceptable Having good self-esteem

Bodily perfectionsThe result of feeling bad about oneself:

Anabolic steroids - Hyper gymnasia – over exerciseBulimia – purgeAnorexia nervosa – fear of weight gainOther subtle results of low self-esteem

Overeating, smoking, filling up on junk food, etc.

Self-restraint:Tending the fire within

The right channeling and controlling of our drives and impulses.Frees us to pour our heart into something

because our efforts are not recklessly scattered among impulses.

Paper Blaze vs Hot Coals: Spectacular but short lived vs Steady and long lived

Passionate about lifeHave the energy to invest in life.

We all have fuel of life’s energy within usEmotions, drives, urges, longing for pleasure

What are you passionate about?Writing, singing, helping others, dancing, etc.

Know Your WorthNo matter how broken, unfree, divided, or out

of control you have ever been, you are still worthy of God’s unconditional love

You can always begin again and become better by learning from the mistakes and letdowns.

God is always there (Hebrews 13:5).

God gave His best for you (John 3:16)