8/12/2019 The 4 Stories We Tell Ourselves About Death

1/3

Stephen Cave: The 4 storieswe tell ourselves about death

I have a question: Who here remembers when they first realized they were going to die?I do I was a young boy! and my grandfather had "ust died! and I remember a few days laterlying in bed at night trying to ma#e sense of what had happened What did it mean that hewas dead? Where had he gone? It was li#e a hole in reality had opened up and swallowedhim $ut then the really sho%#ing question o%%urred to me: If he %ould die! %ould it happen tome too? Could that hole in reality open up and swallow me? Would it open up beneath mybed and swallow me as I slept? Well! at some point! all %hildren be%ome aware of death It%an happen in different ways! of %ourse! and usually %omes in stages &ur idea of deathdevelops as we grow older 'nd if you rea%h ba%# into the dar# %orners of your memory! youmight remember something li#e what I felt when my grandfather died and when I realized it%ould happen to me too! that sense that behind all of this the void is waiting

'nd this development in %hildhood refle%ts the development of our spe%ies (ust as there wasa point in your development as a %hild when your sense of self and of time be%amesophisti%ated enough for you to realize you were mortal! so at some point in the evolution ofour spe%ies! some early human)s sense of self and of time be%ame sophisti%ated enough forthem to be%ome the first human to realize! *I)m going to die* This is! if you li#e! our %urseIt)sthe pri%e we pay for being so damn %lever We have to live in the #nowledge that the worstthing that %an possibly happen one day surely will! the end of all our pro"e%ts! our hopes! ourdreams! of our individual world We ea%h live in the shadow of a personalapo%alypse'nd that)s frightening It)s terrifying 'nd so we loo# for a way out 'nd in my %ase! as I wasabout five years old! this meant as#ing my mum +ow when I first started as#ing whathappens when we die! the grown,ups around me at the time answered with a typi%al -nglishmi. of aw#wardness and half,hearted Christianity! and the phrase I heard most often was thatgranddad was now *up there loo#ing down on us!* and if I should die too! whi%h wouldn)t

happen of %ourse! then I too would go up there! whi%h made death sound a lot li#e ane.istential elevator +ow this didn)t sound very plausible I used to wat%h a %hildren)s newsprogram at the time! and this was the era of spa%e e.ploration There were always ro%#etsgoing up into the s#y! up into spa%e! going up there $ut none of the astronauts when they%ame ba%# ever mentioned having met my granddad or any other dead people $ut I wass%ared! and the idea of ta#ing the e.istential elevator to see my granddad sounded a lotbetter than being swallowed by the void while I slept 'nd so I believed it anyway! eventhough it didn)t ma#e mu%h sense'nd this thought pro%ess that I went through as a %hild! and have been through many timessin%e! in%luding as a grown,up! is a produ%t of what psy%hologists %all a bias +ow a bias is away in whi%h we systemati%ally get things wrong! ways in whi%h we mis%al%ulate!mis"udge! distort reality! or see what we want to see! and the bias I)m tal#ing about wor#s li#ethis: Confront someone with the fa%t that they are going to die and they will believe "ust about

any story that tells them it isn)t true and they %an! instead! live forever! even if it means ta#ingthe e.istential elevator +ow we %an see this as the biggest bias of all It has beendemonstrated in over 4// empiri%al studies +ow these studies are ingenious! but they)resimple They wor# li#e this 0ou ta#e two groups of people who are similar in all relevantrespe%ts! and you remind one group that they)re going to die but not the other! then you%ompare their behavior So you)re observing how it biases behavior when people be%omeaware of their mortality 'nd every time! you get the same result: 1eople who are madeaware of their mortality are more willing to believe stories that tell them they %an es%apedeath and live forever So here)s an e.ample: &ne re%ent study too# two groups ofagnosti%s! that is people who are unde%ided in their religious beliefs +ow! one group wasas#ed to thin# about being dead The other group was as#ed to thin# about being lonelyTheywere then as#ed again about their religious beliefs Those who had been as#ed to thin# aboutbeing dead were afterwards twi%e as li#ely to e.press faith in 2od and (esusTwi%e as

li#ely -ven though the before they were all equally agnosti% $ut put the fear of death inthem! and they run to (esus

8/12/2019 The 4 Stories We Tell Ourselves About Death

2/3

+ow! this shows that reminding people of death biases them to believe! regardless of theeviden%e! and it wor#s not "ust for religion! but for any #ind of belief system that promisesimmortality in some form! whether it)s be%oming famous or having %hildren or evennationalism! whi%h promises you %an live on as part of a greater whole This is a bias that hasshaped the %ourse of human history+ow! the theory behind this bias in the over 4// studies is %alled terror management

theory!and the idea is simple It)s "ust this We develop our worldviews! that is! the stories wetell ourselves about the world and our pla%e in it! in order to help us manage the terror ofdeath'nd these immortality stories have thousands of different manifestations! but I believethat behind the apparent diversity there are a%tually "ust four basi% forms that theseimmortality stories %an ta#e 'nd we %an see them repeating themselves throughout history!

"ust with slight variations to refle%t the vo%abulary of the day +ow I)m going to brieflyintrodu%e these four basi% forms of immortality story! and I want to try to give you somesense of the way in whi%h they)re retold by ea%h %ulture or generation using the vo%abulary oftheir day+ow! the first story is the simplest We want to avoid death! and the dream of doing that inthis body in this world forever is the first and simplest #ind of immortality story! and it might atfirst sound implausible! but a%tually! almost every %ulture in human history has had somemyth or legend of an eli.ir of life or a fountain of youth or something that promises to #eep us

going forever 'n%ient -gypt had su%h myths! an%ient $abylon! an%ient India Throughout-uropean history! we find them in the wor# of the al%hemists! and of %ourse we still believethis today! only we tell this story using the vo%abulary of s%ien%e So 3// years ago!hormoneshad "ust been dis%overed! and people hoped that hormone treatments were going to %ureaging and disease! and now instead we set our hopes on stem %ells! geneti% engineering! andnanote%hnology $ut the idea that s%ien%e %an %ure death is "ust one more %hapter in thestory of the magi%al eli.ir! a story that is as old as %ivilization $ut betting everything on theidea of finding the eli.ir and staying alive forever is a ris#y strategy When we loo# ba%#through history at all those who have sought an eli.ir in the past! the one thing they now havein %ommon is that they)re all deadSo we need a ba%#up plan! and e.a%tly this #ind of plan $ is what the se%ond #ind ofimmortality story offers! and that)s resurre%tion 'nd it stays with the idea that I am this body! Iam this physi%al organism It a%%epts that I)m going to have to die but says! despite that! I %an

rise up and I %an live again In other words! I %an do what (esus did (esus died! he was threedays in the tomb5! and then he rose up and lived again 'nd the idea that we %an all beresurre%ted to live again is orthodo. believe! not "ust for Christians but also (ews and6uslims $ut our desire to believe this story is so deeply embedded that we are reinventing itagain for the s%ientifi% age! for e.ample! with the idea of %ryoni%s That)s the idea that whenyou die! you %an have yourself frozen! and then! at some point when te%hnology hasadvan%ed enough! you %an be thawed out and repaired and revived and so resurre%ted 'ndso some people believe an omnipotent god will resurre%t them to live again! and other peoplebelieve an omnipotent s%ientist will do it$ut for others! the whole idea of resurre%tion! of %limbing out of the grave! it)s "ust too mu%hli#e a bad zombie movie They find the body too messy! too unreliable to guarantee eternallife! and so they set their hopes on the third! more spiritual immortality story! the idea that we%an leave our body behind and live on as a soul +ow! the ma"ority of people on -arthbelieve

they have a soul! and the idea is %entral to many religions $ut even though! in its %urrentform! in its traditional form! the idea of the soul is still hugely popular! nonetheless we areagain reinventing it for the digital age! for e.ample with the idea that you %an leave your bodybehind by uploading your mind! your essen%e! the real you! onto a %omputer! and so live onas an avatar in the ether$ut of %ourse there are s#epti%s who say if we loo# at the eviden%e of s%ien%e! parti%ularlyneuros%ien%e! it suggests that your mind! your essen%e! the real you! is very mu%h dependenton a parti%ular part of your body! that is! your brain 'nd su%h s#epti%s %an find %omfort in thefourth #ind of immortality story! and that is lega%y! the idea that you %an live on through thee%ho you leave in the world! li#e the great 2ree# warrior '%hilles! who sa%rifi%ed his lifefighting at Troy so that he might win immortal fame 'nd the pursuit of fame is aswidespread and popular now as it ever was! and in our digital age! it)s even easier toa%hieve 0ou don)t need to be a great warrior li#e '%hilles or a great #ing or hero 'll you

need is an Internet %onne%tion and a funny %at 78aughter9 $ut some people prefer to leave amore tangible! biologi%al lega%y ,, %hildren! for e.ample &r they li#e! they hope! to live onas

8/12/2019 The 4 Stories We Tell Ourselves About Death

3/3

part of some greater whole! a nation or a family or a tribe! their gene pool $ut again! thereare s#epti%s who doubt whether lega%y really is immortality Woody 'llen! for e.ample! whosaid! *I don)t want to live on in the hearts of my %ountrymen I want to live on in myapartment*So those are the four basi% #inds of immortality stories! and I)ve tried to give "ust somesense of how they)re retold by ea%h generation with "ust slight variations to fit the fashions of

the day 'nd the fa%t that they re%ur in this way! in su%h a similar form but in su%h differentbelief systems! suggests! I thin#! that we should be s#epti%al of the truth of any parti%ularversion of these stories The fa%t that some people believe an omnipotent god will resurre%tthem to live again and others believe an omnipotent s%ientist will do it suggests that neitherare really believing this on the strength of the eviden%e ather! we believe thesestoriesbe%ause we are biased to believe them! and we are biased to believe them be%ausewe are so afraid of deathSo the question is! are we doomed to lead the one life we have in a way that is shaped byfear and denial! or %an we over%ome this bias? Well the 2ree# philosopher -pi%urus thoughtwe %ould ;e argued that the fear of death is natural! but it is not rational *