T he W ellspring of J oy
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Transcript of T he W ellspring of J oy
“Whoever believes in Me. . .streams of living water will flow from within him.”
John 8:38
Shame
Guilt: I did something bad
Shame: I am something bad
There’s something wrong with me
Shame
Healthy shame1. Modesty2. Awareness of not measuring
up to our true self Unhealthy, undeserved shame:
believing the lies that deny what God says is true
Sources of Shame
Parents Peers Self Society
The Message of Shame
“I am defective and I am afraid I will be rejected and abandoned.”
Healing from Shame
Fear: I am unacceptable Antidote: God says I am accepted!
Shame? Grace!
The healing for shame is to experience grace by making a choice to receive God’s acceptance as His gift.
I am accepted in the Beloved (Eph. 1:6) The Father has accepted me (Rom. 14:3) Christ has accepted me (Rom. 15:7)
Shame
“We are accepted wholesale. Accepted with no possibility of being rejected. Accepted once and accepted forever. Accepted at the ultimate depth of our being. We are given what we have longed for in every nook and nuance of every relationship.” --Louis Smedes
Self-Pity
Self-Pity
Self-Pity
Not a primary feeling (sadness, grief, loss)
One response to legitimate negative feelings: “Poor me!”
Another response: trust God Body odor Grief and sadness are not sinful
Self-Pity Sadness | Self-pity Sadness: “Life in a fallen world hurts.” Self-pity: “I don’t deserve this.” Antidote to self-pity:
I deserve nothing but hell Life in a fallen world hurts; this is my share Bad things happen, good things happen God is still good I will trust Him
Unforgiveness
Has anyone ever hurt you? An arrow was lodged in your heart. Arrows generate lies Arrows generate pain
What forgiveness feels like
Forgiveness
Forgiving: letting go of my right to see you suffer for what you did to me.
Removing your hands from the other person’s throat
Unforgiveness
Forgive: to let go and send away Acknowledging the offense and then
transferring the offender over to God in our hearts
Deliberately choosing not to hold the offense against the offender and not to bring it up again
Unforgiveness: refusing to let go of an offense Christ has already paid for
“Hot potato”
Letting Go
Misunderstandings about Forgiveness
“Forgive and Forget” Forgiving is not trust Forgiving is not reconciliation Forgiving does not mean what they
did was OK. Forgiving doesn’t mean the offender
gets away with it.
What Forgiveness Means
Forgiveness means acknowledging the offense and then transferring the offender over to God in our hearts.
Forgiving someone means we deliberately choose to not to hold his offense against him and not to bring it up again.
Steps to Forgiveness
1. Acknowledge the offense
2. Turn the person over to God to repay them
Obstacles to the Wellspring of Joy
Shame: Receive God’s gift of acceptance
Self-pity: Repent of your selfishness and choose to trust God in your pain
Unforgiveness: Take them off your hook and put them on Jesus’ hook
The Jesus Jail