Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

24
N o+ ofro.;J +o LOolK hoMe ,,lone di- Summing Up The Summit pg. 5 The Old Crock pg. 17 Festival Season Is Stirring pg.20

description

Synthesis Vol 19 Iss 26

Transcript of Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

Page 1: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

No+ belt1~ ofro.;J +o LOolK hoMe

,,lone di- ni~ht

Summing Up The Summit pg. 5 The Old Crock pg. 17 Festival Season Is Stirring pg.20

Page 2: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3
Page 3: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

INSIDE THIS WEEK'S ISSUE s nthesis

COMMUNITY ACTION FRIENDS Once again, Matt Olson puts himself on the front lines at the Community Action Summit to follow up on his recent article in the Synthesis titled "Hello My Name Is Chico And I Have A Drinking Problem:' His article garnered quite a bit of attention from community members and students alike. Now he brings us the update about what happened at this much-needed community collaboration.

BETTER KNOW A COUNCIL MEMBER Three new candidates have been elected to the fightin' seven, the Chico City Council. We know they're full of win when it comes to getting votes, but in the middle of the night they probably step on Legos just like the rest of us. Get to know the fun side of your city councilmembers and see if there's anything you might have in common with these municipal maniacs.

READY, SET, FESTIVAL! It's been called the Hipster SXSW, but nobody can deny that after 21 years, Noise Pop is a finely curated musical experience. It takes place in venues all around San Francisco Febrary 26th through March 3rd. David Neuschatz kicks off festival season right with a preview of this highly anticipated annual extravaganza and some highlights to look forward to at Noise Pop 2013.

IMMACULATE INFECTION

PUT A FORK IN IT

COMICAL RUMINATIONS

OFF MY LAWN!

PEDAL PUSHERS

syn.the.sis

06

07

16

17

21

The composition or combination of parts or

elements so as to form a whole b: the production

of a substance by the union of chemical

elements, groups, or simpler compounds or by

the degradation of a complex compound c : the

combining of often diverse conceptions into a

coherent whole; also : the complex so formed

FACEBOOK.COM/CHICOCA • SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

LETTER FROM THE EDITOR Sara Calvosa [email protected]

4th Grade History I've got a fourth grader and apparently it's some kind of traditional rite of passage for fourth graders to do reports on California Missions. I didn't have to endure this kind of nasty bastard reporting because I skipped the fourth grade. Don't get hung up on that part though, I also went to high school on a reservation. My mother is Karuk, a Klamath river tribe that hails from Happy Camp. And I'll admit that the name of the town is pretty misleading.

The tribes that inhabit my rez have suffered pretty much every day since they laid eyes on their first European. The challenges they face maintaining their shredded culture, fighting poverty and generational socioeconomic depression shouldn't surprise you, but it probably DOES because kids are still doing freaking fourth grade mission projects. How can we expect to learn from our historical mistakes if we don't teach actual history?

So, when my fourth grader came home with his mission project paperwork, I tried not to scoff and rage about it. I'm a bad indian anyway. I don't live on the rez and I'm not living or perpetuating my cultural heritage. Probably because my Mom didn't do that with me. Probably because my mom was tall, thin, had blue eyes and blonde hair, and nobody believed for a minute that she wasn't a viking. And since I inherited my mother's coloring, as did my sister, we were pretty much rolling with our whiteness because no matter how much we said we were native, nobody believed us any­way. Plus, my parents were super busy being hippies.

That bit of background aside, I don't think you have to grow up on a reservation to know that glossing the role that the missions played in the destruction of native populations is a pretty shady way to teach California History. I mean, the tribe associated with my kid's mission went extinct. Like dinosaurs, but with people. And that's a pretty huge bummer, I get it. It might be hard to teach something so shitty; kids are sensitive.

After mulling it over and attempting to find an angle that my son and I both felt comfortable with, we finally settled on the idea that I was going to just have a cow about it with his teacher and get it over with. To his teacher's credit, she took a class day to explain the other side of the mission project to the kids and I greatly appreciate it. And clearly I need to get in touch with my own roots so that I can then share that with my kids. But still, I can't help but feel really sad to hear my nine-year-old identify with and defend the Spanish padres. If those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it, then we're setting our children, and our children's children, up for failure. Down with fourth grade mission projects, up with Native American studies.

And you pronounce it Hoo-nip-ero not Juna-perro.

FEB RUARY 25 - MARCH 3, 2013 3 I

Page 4: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

Locals Only

4 FEBRUARY 25 - MARCH 3, 2013

Councilmember Crossquiz Alright constituents, here is your pop quiz! Now that you're so well

acquainted with your new councilmembers, you should be ready to

answer just a few questions regarding likes, dislike, and mystery stains.

ACROSS DOWN 3. Ritter: One of favorite Chico traditions - for Peace

4. Morgan: Collects Tommy Bahama Cigar ___ _

7. Stone: Owns 1 car and 5

8. Stone: Last concert he went to

10. Stone: Played in The

Wiz

11. Ritter: Wanted to be a weaver and __ _

14. Ritter: Baseball team sticker on Tami's car

16. Stone: Likes any baseball team other than the __ _

17. Morgan: Favorite TV Show Chicago __ _

18. Morgan: Favorite kind of music

19. Ritter: Grown in Tami's garden

1. Morgan: Bumper sticker

indicates he has an honor roll student at ___ _

2. Ritter: Doesn't have a __ _

5. Morgan: Traded chairs with ____ due to questionable stains

6. Stone: Born on 1st day of Senate ____ Hearings

9. Ritter: Specific type of dog she

prefers

12. Morgan: Last concert attended - Michael __ _

13. Stone: Ameteur radio __ _

15. Stone: Area Director for _ __ Olympics

INC. 1872

For 19 years The Synthesis' goal has remained to provide a forum for

entertainment, music, humor, community awareness, opinions, and change.

PUBLISHER Kathy Barrett

[email protected]

MANAGING EDITOR Sara Calvosa

[email protected]

EDITOR Nolan Ford

[email protected]

DESIGNERS Michaela Warthen

Paige Cloke Tanner Ulsh

[email protected]

DELIVERIES Joey Murphy Molly Roberts

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Arielle Mullen, Bob Howard, Bryan Lex, Danny Cohen, David Neuschatz, Dillon Carroll, Evan Billman, Guy Starvist, Howl, Jack Knight, Jen Cartier, Josie Hall, Jeremy Gerrard, Kenneth

Kelly, Koz McKev, Ky Junkins, Matt Olson, Molly Lex, Ryan Hawkley, Steve Swim, Tommy Diestel

PHOTOGRAPHY Jessica Sid

Vincent Latham

CALENDAR Bethany Johnson

[email protected]

NERD Dain Sandoval

[email protected]

ACCOUNTING Ben Kirby

OWNER Bill Fishkin

[email protected]

The Synthesis is both owned and published by Apartment 8 Productions. All things published in these pages are the property of Apartment 8 Productions and may not be reproduced, copied or used in any other way, shape or form without the written consent of Apartment 8 Productions. One copy (maybe two) of the Synthesis is available free to residents in Butte, Tehama and Shasta counties. Anyone caught removing papers will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law (and our law!). All opinions expressed throughout the Synthesis are those of the author and are not necessarily the same opinions as Apartment 8 Productions and the Synthesis. The Synthesis welcomes, wants, and will even desperately beg for letters because we care what you think. We can be reached via snail mail at the Synthesis, 210 W. 6th St., Chico, California, 95928. Email [email protected]. Please sign all of your letters with your real name, address and preferably a phone number. We may also edit your submission for content and space.

210 West 6th Street Chico Ca 95928

530.899.7708 [email protected]

SY NTH ESISWEE KLY.COM

Page 5: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

SCENE REPORT words and photos by Matt Olson

Community Summit Summup Feb. 23 BMU, Chico State Campu_s _

Four hundred people representing virtually every part of the

Chico community attended a gathering on the Chico State

campus last Friday to

collaborate on actions

we can take to change Chico's increasingly

out-of-control

drinking culture.

Attendees ranged

from the Chico State

and Butte College student bodies,

fraternities and

sororities, parents and

University officials, to

members of the Chico

City Council, Chico Police and EMTs,

to downtown bar owners, retail sellers

of alcohol, apartment building owners, as well as a healthy

dose of average Chico community members like me.

We were greeted with a seating arrangement oflarge,

concentric ovals, immediately giving off a collaborative feel

rather than a lecture hall. Paul Zingg, the President of Chico

State, set the tone by saying, ''Action without understanding

has no meaning.

Understanding

without action has

no consequence. We're talking

about trying to

understand and to

act in a meaningful

and consequential

way to address

issues that connect us. We're not here

to wring hands in

frustration and

desperation. Were

not here to wag

our fingers and lecture, and we're

certainly not here

to point our fingers in blame. We are here to connect, and communicate, and commit."

I was surprised to see so many

people jump up and propose topics

for discussion. There was so much

passion and interest in this topic and

everyone seemed to have ideas to

bring to the table. Topics included,

"Why should the University recognize frats at all?" as well as, "The role of the

media and advertising" and, "How can

local business help?" There was also

discussion surrounding the topics of "Early intervention in K-12 and the

importance of parental responsibility" and, "Alcohol and sexual assault." The

discussions following each topic were

vibrant-full of intelligent ideas and

well-informed, respectful dialogue.

Of the students in attendance, the majority seemed to be either from, affiliated with, or defending the fraternities and

sororities. Numerous sulking frat dudes wore their letters

and sat with bored expressions and arms crossed, unhappy at

having to deal with what has become an existential crisis. The

Greek system has been suspended since last semester after

numerous accounts of hazing at several fraternities, and the

death of Mason Sumnicht, a pledge to Sigma Pi, after a night of

heavy drinking on his 2 lst birthday. They are to be reinstated

next month if they agree to a set of strict guidelines to prevent

violence and alcohol abuse.

One breakout session was led by a community member who

asked why frats should be recognized by the University at all.

His main point was that this is a relatively small percentage of

the student population that is directly or indirectly involved in

a disproportionately high percentage of dangerous situations

such as alcohol poisonings, brutal hazing, and student deaths.

This naturally drew an audience consisting largely of fraternity

and sorority leadership and membership, in which they

attempted to persuade us that they do a lot of good, raising

money for charity and so on. They attempted to deflect by

saying that technically their houses are dry, and that they don't

throw parties where alcohol is served. I'll leave it up to you

to decide if you believe that or not. At one point, Paul Zingg

FACEBOOK.COM/CHICOCA • SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

joined the conversation and had a poignant declaration: "Be

who you say you are. There are no more second chances. This is it:'

There were other bright students in attendance that brought a

fresh perspective. Liza Worden, from the student groups CAVE

(Community Action Volunteers in Education) and SAVE

(Students Against Violence Everywhere), sat in on the breakout

group dedicated to how local business can help. She said, "One

of the first things I did when I came here was to get involved with volunteer work in the community. I felt like, 'Oh wow. I

belong to this community, there are adults out there that care

about what I'm doing and appreciate what I'm doing: That very

first connection made me feel like Chico was my home, rather

than just a place where I'm going to school. Whether it be volunteer work, or recreational activities, or feeling connected

to a certain business or entity in the community, or an actual

internship or job (which would be prime for the students)

that's the best way to get them invested in the community and feel like this is their home:'

I couldn't agree more. We need a much deeper integration

between the Chico business and arts communities and the

student body, providing not just internships where they are

treated as free labor, but long term mentorships. This not only

provides productive channels for youthful energy that might

otherwise be put into a night of drinking, but it provides a

deeper connection and incentive to stay in Chico, growing the

local economy and building a virtuous cycle of creative energy.

FEBRUARY 25 - MARCH 3, 2013 5

Page 6: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

GRAND OPENING SPECIALS HAIRCUTS - $7.00 includes free beverage and neck shave SHAVE - $12.00 COLOR - $15.00 & yp .. HOURS Tuesday - Saturday 10am to 6pm Sunday and Monday By Appointment Only

Located at 221 Normal Street - Next to Kinder's and Across the parking Lot from The Bear

High Performance Detail Cleaners Residential and Commercial Cleaning Services!

• Apartment • Business

• Home • Warehouse

• Office • and more!

Cost Effective, Customer Friendly Cleaning Service Fees

FREE estimates with walk- through site inspection

(530)774-1175 http://supercleanpros.webs.com

I 6 FEBRUARY 25 - MARCH 3, 2013

"We clean to YOUR specifications!"

IMMACULATE INFECTION Bob Howard [email protected]

Goodbye And Good Riddance

Well, February is nearly over, and while I have gained some insight from the "alcohol-free"

experience, I am truly looking forward to

enjoying a nice, tall glass of whiskey come the first of March. Between tornadoes, meteorites,

a bludgeoning schedule, and terrible personal

tragedy, it has been a terrifically humbling

month. I've

found myself

at times ready

to fling my

body onto

the ground,

prostrate

myself, and

give it all up

for whatever

greater deities

or demons

might be

receptive to my

entreaties. I

have sympathy

for the Pope

and his decision

to become the

first Pontiff to

resign since

the early 15th

century.

I've given a lot of my energy, in the form of sweat and tears, to the ground - and the

ground has helped to wear me out so that my

sleep has come relatively easily. Of course this has resulted in a stiff back, sore muscles, and

what might be the first indication of a hernia

throbbing in my groin. Good times. That being

said, I believe the quinoa is sprouting, the

garlic is thick and green, and today I snacked

on a delicious white radish I pulled from of

the soil. If you are an impatient gardener,

plant radishes; the tenacious little roots sprout

within days, and can be table-ready within

sixty days. You can grow them all through

the winter and spring; it's only in the heat of

summer that they will tend to bolt before the

bulb has a chance to form. While the radishes

and garlic are performing wonderfully, I had to

give the potatoes and the spinach a pep-talk -

no signs of life, yet.

Nashville

Trish is mad about the new soap opera-esque drama that is the television show, Nashville.

In fact, right now she is performing the "bullsh*t" chant

as a result of

Nashville being

pre-empted

this evening by

a Katie Courie

Oscar Special.

I've caught the show, which

combines the

country music

scene and a

scandalous

political

landscape, a few times, and

it is layered

with characters

and situations

that generate

tension. Back

when I was in school, one of

my teachers told me one key to screenwriting

was to create tension in every scene. The more tension there is, the more interested the

audience will be.

Cheesy television shows aside, the city of

Nashville will always hold a special place in

my heart. It is the city where Trish and I took a formative, week-long "date:' Over the course

of the trip we flooded one motel room, bought forty beers for ten dollars at a bar called "the

Chute," made a lot of friends in the process,

enjoyed whiskey shots with songwriters in the

honky-tonk next to the Country Music Hall of Fame, spent a lot of "quality time" in the

bedroom, and by the end of the trip, came to

find ourselves officially engaged.

SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

Page 7: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

PUT A FORK IN IT Jen Cartier [email protected]

Put A Sticker On That Fish! My eight-year-old son, who has been inter­ested in researching whales, recently said to me, "I saw the cutest whale in the world. It was a baby beluga;' and immediately the Raffi song began sloshing through my mem­ories of childhood past. I don't mean to press on our bleeding hearts for cute creatures, but then again, I kind of do. That whale was god­damned adorable.

If you're paying much attention to the state of our food affairs, you know that just as our main­land agribusiness capitalizes on irre­sponsibly produced, inexpensive food for the undereducated and underfunded masses, our oceans are being badly overfished and under-water ecosystems are being destroyed by catch methods such as trawling - a type of net-fishing which indiscriminately catches fish of all types including sharks, dolphins, and sea turtles and scrapes the bottom of the ocean floor, destroying important ecosys­tems along the way. It's like trying to harvest wild blueberries, and instead of picking them from the bush, plowing acres of forest with bulldozers and then sifting out the ber­ries (bummer about all those squirrels and trees).

Let's face it: we're all a bunch of consumer­fish swimming in a sea of products. How are we supposed to know which products are sustainable unless we can quickly and easily identify them as such? Even then, can we trust the label?

As a society, most of us can quickly identify the organic products on a grocery store shelf by the USDA label, and the Non-GMO Verified label helps us understand which products are least likely to turn us into giant clown-chickens with cancer. The Marine

Stewardship Council (MSC) has developed a new labeling system for seafood that, once widely embraced, should help us quickly and effectively choose our chicken-of-the-sea from responsible anglers.

What does "responsible" or "sustain-able" actually mean? MSY, or Maximum

Sustainable Yield is

RAFFI the largest number of fish that can be har­vested from a stock without depleting the abundance of its members or impair­ing those members' ability to reproduce effectively. That is the number the MSC is concerned with.

But there's other important data, too. The new label applies

only to wild-caught fish and is awarded when companies follow MSC standards for sustainability of fish populations, and imple­ment practices to minimize environmental impacts. Companies must also prove they are effectively managed to respond to the changing needs of the fish, their ecosystem, and laws applying to fisheries.

Because half of the world's traded sea-food comes from developing nations, it's important that these nations have access to sustainable supplies of fish, and that they are able to market their products in a growing industry. The MSC works with developing nations to provide access to data collec-tion to assist small fisheries in proving they implement sustainable practices, and helps them obtain certification and the use of the MSC label for marketing purposes.

Watch for the new label. Protect the baby beluga. Do good work with your fork.

Find out more at www.msc.org

FACEBOOK.COM/CHICOCA • SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

Sunday, March 17th

$20 ShamrocksJt

BRAND HEW DANCE PARTY FEATURING THE HOTTEST DJ'S IN CHICO! 9PM-2RM I 21+ • $1/2/3 DRINK SPECIALS

00 ~~ 00 ~ 00 TI[W ~~[ID~ FEB lST I MAR lST I APR 5TH I MAY 3RD

FEBRUARY 25 - MARCH 3, 2013 7

Page 8: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

Noobs, nOObs, newbs! We've got

three new City Council members

this year. Three new pairs of eyes on the issues and new cheeks in the chairs, bringing new energy and vitality to the issues facing our happy hamlet.We're all familiar with their politics, their platforms, and their proclivity in the public eye, but

how do they feel about raisins? Are they good dancers? Do they listen to Taylor Swift in secret? In an attempt to personify our public servants, we've asked them a series of ques­

tions to figure out what makes them tick. They can't be srs bznss all the

time, right? They have lives outside of their newly-elected government office, and I bet their lives look a lot

like the lives of the constituents they represent.

I a FEBRUARY 25 - MARCH 3, 2013

Synthesis If you were trapped on a desert island would you want to be alone or trapped with his worst enemy (keeping in mind that if you were trapped with your worst enemy you'd have something to eat)? Morgan I even like my worst enemy and I'd never eat him. Synthesis Were you ner­

vous about your first city

council meeting?

Morgan Yes Synthesis Last concert

you went to? Morgan Michael Buble Synthesis Do you have

bumper stickers on your car? What do they say? Morgan I have an honor

roll student at CJHS. Also, Life is Better When You Surf.

/' Collects Tommy Bahama Cigar

Ashtrays

Don't you just hate raisins?

I prefer them fermented.

Are there any stains on your city council chair

that kind of freak you out?

There were but I traded chairs with Sorenson

when he wasn't looking.

Synthesis Do you have kiddos?

If so, have you stepped on a LEGO

in the middle of the night? Hurts doesn't it? Morgan Yes and yes.

Synthesis Are you a cat person or

a dog person? Morgan I'm a people person.

Has lived in Chico

~ars

Synthesis What's your favorite

kind of music? Morgan Is there something other

than country?

Synthesis Favorite TV Show?

Morgan Chicago Fire

Synthesis What's something that

you like that you think people might not expect? Morgan Mai Tais

Synthesis How would people have

described you in high school? Morgan Not very well.

SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

Page 9: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

RANDALL STONE

Synthesis Can you rollerskate to Gangnam

Style? If so, submit video. Stone No, but I probably can find video of my

performance as the Scarecrow in The Wiz (not to be confused as the Wizard of Oz). Oh yeah, baby. I've got soul.

Has lived in Chico for 18

years

Synthesis Do you collect anything? Stone Backcountry gear. I am an amateur

radio operator and have a healthy number of "rigs." Synthesis Are there any stains on your city

council chair that kind of freak you out? Stone No, but the EMI that is released by

having monitors pointing at your waist cannot be good for people of reproductive ages.

"I'm the Area Director for Special Olympics Butte County. But my favorite charities are those that are the least supported

and most efficient."

Synthesis Age? Stone 39

Synthesis How long have you lived in Chico? Stone 18 years. Synthesis Are you a good dancer? Stone I've been known to embarrass myself with

some ballroom and swing from time to time. Synthesis How many miles per gallon does

your car get? Stone Sadly 15. But we have one car and five bicycles

- using them proportionately. My wife and I are very active snow campers and backcountry skiers. This necessitates a 4WD and hence the 15 MPG average.

~

FACEBOOK.COM/CHICOCA • SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

Synthesis Were you nervous about your first city council meeting? Stone Not at all. Synthesis Favorite sportsball team? Stone Giants, A's, anybody but the Dodgers. Baseball.

It's the only game I truly understand and appreciate. Synthesis Last concert you went to? Stone Rush. San Jose. November 15th, 2012. Synthesis Do you have a garden? What do you grow? Stone I'd love to have a garden. I haven't the time

between everything else. But when our new baby is born, my wife and I have already decided to learn and teach him/her about self-sufficiency. So in a way, my garden is my coming child. Synthesis If you were trapped on a desert island

would you want to be alone or trapped with your worst enemy (keep in mind that if you're trapped with your worst enemy you'll have something to eat)? Stone My worst enemy would be a much-needed

resource on a desert island - for all the usual reasons, and for all the ways in which I might be able to look at things differently and come to solutions. It sure beats talking to Wilson all day and night.

He's a Taurus, born on the first day of the Senate Watergate hearings!

What's something that you like that you think people might

not expect?

NWA and Eminem. Loud music. Teaching.

I absolutely love to teach.

FEBRUARY 25 - MARCH 3, 2013 9 I

Page 10: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

Vegetarian!

~ Tami "wanted to be a weaver and a potter" when she grew up.

Synthesis How many miles per gallon does your car get? Ritter 30ish Synthesis Are you a cat person or a

dog person? Dog. Rescued. Synthesis How would people have

described you in high school? Ritter Absent a lot.

Do you have a garden? What do you grow?

Yes. Arugula, tomatoes,

peppers, eggplant, cucumbers, sunfbwers, basil, lots of in

inedible but useful weeds like

I 10

feverfew and mullein

Has lived in Chico J since 1996 /

Bumper Stickers? You Know it!

Phillies. Human Rights Campaign. What happens

to the water happens to the people, and Do a Mitzvah.

FEBRUARY 18 - FEBRUARY 24, 2013

What's something that you like that you think people

might not expect?

I really loved my last job doing

domestic violence offender

treatment. I loved working

with the clients and really

appreciated how hard many of

them worked to change.

~Tammy doesn't have a TV!

Synthesis Are there any stains on your city council chair that kind of freak you out? Ritter Not that I have noticed, but

thanks a lot. Now I will have to check. Synthesis Were you nervous about

your first city council meeting? Ritter Yup. Synthesis Favorite Chico tradition?

(ie Polar Bear swim, kite day, etc.)? Ritter World Music Festival, Pancakes

for Peace. Synthesis Role models, mentors? Ritter Former boss Kevin Hansen from

World Wheelchair Sports, my mom, my friend Lisa who is the most loving person I know.

Unfortunately Tammy was

unavailable for the photoshoot,

thus necessitating a blatant

photoshop job.

SYN TH ESISWEE KLY.COM

Page 11: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

NEW Bamtiaa Strel:chinr:m Raam

Featuring Bamboo Walls and Ceiling, BOSU, Ballet Bars, Foam Rollers,

Flexibility Balls, Mats, and MORE Coming

Next Month!

GRlt\D OPID\t\G! tUR(ft 8lft \-8' t,\

Heo\thy U •Renew f\oot Spa Cutt\ng Room

FOOD & BEVERAGES, "TOURS, EN1ER1A\NMEN1, G\H CER1\F\CA1,ES,

OEMON51RA1\0N5, ANO MORE.

• NEW Personal Training Studio Opening in 2 Months! • NEW l.M.F. Website and App with Incredible Features! • NEW Spin Bikes Here! • NEW Meditation Classes! • MORE Biggest Challenge and Crossfit Classes Now! • NEW Day Spa, Hair Salon, Pilates Studio & PT Center! • SOON - Outdoor Running Track and Parcourse with

Outdoor Cardio and Weight Machines!

~ 1n morion FITnErJ ~SORT+ HEALTH CLUB+ CAFE 1293 E First Ave, Chico I 343-5678 I www.inmotionfitness.net

FACEBOOK.COM/CHICOCA • SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

r

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I L

Affordable menus. Exceptional taste. We can't wait to serve you!

Eat. Drink. Be Merry. Locally.

phone: 530.222.4895 facebook.com/blushcatering

- - - - - - - - ------

RC Worthy Goods

TORE ~e{f fO..fh-t'olf

Good at both Arc Stores! Open 7 Days a Week!

Exp. 2/15/2013

2020 Park Avenue, Chico 2745 Oro Dam Blvd., Oroville 530.343.3666 530.532.1272

www.arcbutte.org www.thearcstore.org

- - - - - - ------ - -FEBRUARY 18 - FEBRUARY 24, 2013 I 11

"I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I .. I

Page 12: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

synthesis please drink responsibly!

MON TUE WED THU FRI SAT SUN

337 Main St. • 530-343-17 45 Please Drink Responsibly

I 12 FEB RUARY 25 - MARCH 3, 2013

S3 14oz Slushies S4 20oz Slushies Add shot for SI 5 flavors to choose from

CAPT MORGAN PROMO S4.SO Dbl Captains 10-close

S3 14oz Slushies S4 20oz Slushies Add shot for SI 5 flavors to choose from

BACARDI PROMO S4.SO Dbl Bacardi JO-close

Mon-Fri happy hour 11-2PM S2.SO Dom & Sierra Nevada Drafts

3-6PM S3.SO Dbl Wells 6PM - close SB Dom Pitcher S9 SN Pitcher

2 DOLLAR TUESDAY' Food & Drink specials!

11AM-2PM S2.50 SN & Dom Drafts

2-close S2.SO wells & Dom Drafts S3.50 Dbl Wells & Kami shots

WING WEDNESDAY' S2 for 3 Wings S2.SO SN Pint All Day

BPM-Close S3.SO Jim Beam, Captain Morgan and Jameson

11-2PM S2.SO Dom & Sierra Nevada Drafts

3-6PM S3.SO Dbl Wells B-close S3 Soccer Moms SS Smirnff Blasters SS DBL Roaring Vodka

Hour 11-2PM S2.SO Dom & Sierra Nevada Drafts

3-6PM S3.SO Dbl Wells B-Close S2.SO Dom & Sierra Nevada Drafts

Open 11AM Bloody Mary Bar Noon-6PM SB Dom Pitcher S9 SN Pitcher BPM-Close S6.50 DBL calls

IOAM-2PM SS Bottles of Champagne with entree S4.SO Bloody Mary SS.SO Absolut Peppar Bloody Marys

Wednesday 9pm: DANCE NIGHT! DJ SPENNY & JEFF HOWSE

Friday 4-7pm: HAPPY HOUR! THE PUB SCOUTS

Daily Happy Hour from 4-7PM PBR S2.2S Everyday!

Daily Happy Hour from 4-7PM PBR S2 .2S Everyday'

Daily Happy Hour from 4-7PM Full Bar in Back Room

Weds, Fri & Sat Nights' PBR S2.2S Everyday!

Daily Happy Hour from 4-7PM PBR S2.2S Everyday'

Daily Happy Hour from 4-7PM Full Bar in Back Room

Weds, Fri & Sat Nights! PBR S2.2S Everyday'

Daily Happy Hour from 4-7PM Full Bar in Back Room

Weds, Fri & Sat Nights! PBR S2.2S Everyday!

Daily Happy Hour from 4-7PM PBR S2.2S Everyday!

Mon-Fri 2-6PM SI.SO PBR or Coors Pints S2 Kami Shooters 1/2 OFF POOL

8 Ball Tournament

Signup at noon Starts !PM All ages until IOPM

Mon-Fri 2-6PM SI.SO PBR or Coors Pints S2 Kami Shooters 1/2 OFF POOL

GAME NIGHT! SI PBR all night All ages until IOPM

Mon-Fri 2-6PM SI.SO PBR or Coors Pints S2 Kami Shooters 1/2 OFF POOL

Mon-Fri 2-6PM SI.SO PBR or Coors Pints S2 Kami Shooters 1/2 OFF POOL

JAZZ NIGHT- Martini Specials All ages until IOPM

Mon-Fri 2-6PM SI.SO PBR or Coors Pints S2 Kami Shooters

1/2 OFF POOL All ages until IOPM

Bartenders Choice

All ages until IOPM

FREE POOL I hr. with every SB purchase All ages until IOPM

MONSTER MONDAY SPECIALS 6PM-CLOSE

S6 Pulled pork sand w/ fries or salad

DOLLAR DAZE 6-9pm SI Beer SI Wells S2 Doubles

Chicken Strip Sand only S6 before 6 PM

Jr Grad Burger w/ fries or

salad S3.99

B-Close Pitcher Specials S6/S9/S12

FREE Pool after IOPM

Baby Back Ribs SI0.99 Philly Cheesesteak S7 BPM-Close S4 teas and SIO.SO import pitchers !Opm S2 Red Bull Party Starters

S3 All pints S4 Long Island Teas

10 oz. Tri-Tip Steak w/ Fries or Salad & Garlic

Bread S7.99 Bpm-Close S4 Jager SS DBL Vodka Red Bull JO-Close Jr Grad Burger w/ fries or

salad S3.99

Baby Back Ribs with Salad, Fries & garlic Bread SI0.99 Bpm-Close S4 Jack & Coke SS DBLs S3 Captain 9PM-Close S2 Sierra Nevada SS Patron

S4.99 Grad, Garden/ turkey Burger w/ fries/ salad

Bloody Marys S3 Well S4 Call SS Top shelf S6 Grey Goose

SY NTH ESISWE EKLY.COM

Page 13: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

Happy Hour 11-6PM Go Downlo select bottles & drafts S2.75

S2 All Day Go Downlo S2 Select Sierra Nevada or Dom Drafts S2 Kamis -any fhvor

All 16 oz Teas or AMF S3 Go Oownlo All Day

Happy Hour 11-6PM DANCEHALL S2.75 select bottles & drafts S2 Select Beers

S3 Teas S216oz Wells

Free Happy Hour Food !!'FEVER FRIDAYS!!! 4PM until ifs gone

Happy Hour 11-6PM Insane Sl/S2/S3 specials! select wells, bottles and VIP Bottle Service pints S2.75 available

S4 Sex On The Beach 54 Sierra Nevada Knightro ON TAP SS Bartender's Choice SS SI Jello Shots 7-IOPM S3 Rumpy, Jager and Fireball

S4 World Famous Bloody Call To Rent For Private Joe Party S5 Premium bloodys your choice of vodka Go Downlo

BEAR-E-OKE OPEN MIC - CLOSED COMEDY MUSIC

BURGER MADNESS' Bear Burger with fries MUG NIGHT 7-IUO or salad for S5.29. 40oz beer S2.50 or S3 llam-!Opm. S5 Bombay Dry Gin

Martini

SS Don Julio Resposada

BEAR WEAR' KARAOKE 9-CLOSE S3 Tea of the Day and 1/2 off while wearing Bartender Special Bear Wear. S4 Dbl Peach Tea MUG CLUB 4-IOPM Lemonade

S2 Green Apple Kami S4 Melon Cosmo S2 Miller Lite

TRIKE RACES! SMASHED SPELLING BEE S3 Tea of the Day Post time @ !Opm. S3.50 Sky Vodka Win T-shirts and Bear SI SoCo Pepper shot Cocktails Bucks. S4 Dbl Capt. Morgan MUG CLUB 4-IOPM Black & Coke

S3 Jose Cueivo Silver

BURGER MADNESS! KARAOKE 9PM S3 all teas Bear Burger with fries S6 Sky Vodka and or salad for S5.29. S3 Seagrams Dark Honey Redbull llam-!Opm. Lemonade BUCK NIGHT 9PM-Close

S4 Dbl Cuervo Silver SI BEERS Sunrise SI WELLS S2 Miller Lite SI TEAS

5-IOPM PENNY BURGER DRAG KING SHOW 9PM S3 Tea of the Day W/ COUPON ON BACK DBL Bacardi COVER S2 Melon Sours Cocktail Special

S3 Fireball shots Vodka Redbull S5 LATE NIGHT EATS' BEAR S2 Mango Kami BURGER AND FRIES FOR CAPT. MORGAN PROMO ONLY S4.99! S4.50 Dbl Captains Mon-Sat !Opm - lam. JO-close

5-IOPM PENNY BURGER LIVE MUSIC S3 Tea of the Day W/ COUPON ON BACK S4.50 DBL Captain plus COVER S4 Peach Sweet Tea Bartender Special

Lemonade LATE NIGHT EATS! BEAR S2 Cherry Bourbon Coke BURGER AND FRIES FOR S3 Peanut Brittle White

ONLY S4.99' Russian

Mon-Sat !Opm - lam.

BURGER MADNESS! SUNDAY SOCIAL 3-7PM Champagne Brunch Bear Burger with fries TRIVIA 8PM !OAM-2PM or salad for S5.29. Happy Hour prices all llam-!Opm. S2.50 Bloody & Mimosa day!

S4 Dbl Melon Sour S5 Don Julio Reposada

Available For Private S2 Marqis Parties. S3 Cueivo Marqis

S2.50 Corona's Make your reservation & Sierra Drafts today! Mon-Sat 3PM-6PM SI

Dom draft, S2 SN draft, S!.50 wells

S2.25 PBR Progressive Night! S2.75 Well & Dom. 8-IOPM SI Sierra Pale All day - Every day Ale, Domestics & well

cocktails up lOPM-dose 25¢ per hour-close Mon-Sat free pool 6-8PM

S2.25 PBR Buck Night S2.75 Well & Dom. 8-dose All day - Every day Sl well cocktails, Sierra

Nevada Pale Ale, dom draft S3 Guiness Drafts, S2 Black Butte S5 Vodka Redbull

S2 25 PBR S3.50 151 party punch S2.75 Well & Dom. S3 Fire Eater Shots All day - Every day S6.50 Apple Cinnamon

Cider SIO BOTTLES OF 8-9PM SI pale ale CHAMPAGNE and dom draft

up 25<: per hour until dose

S2.25 PBR Power Hour 8-9PM S2.75 Well & Dom. 1/2 off Liquor & Drafts All day - Every day 9PM-Close

S3 Pale Ale Drafts S9.75 Pale Pitchers CAPT. MORGAN PROMO S4.50 Dbl Captains 10-close

S2.25 PBR Mon-Sat 3PM-6PM S2.75 Well & Dom. SI Dom draft, All day - Every day S2 SN draft, S!.50 wells,

Power Hour 8-9PM 1/2 off Liquor & Drafts 9-Close S3 Skyy Cocktails & Pale Ale Drafts S9.75 Pale Pitchers

CLOSED CLOSED

"'C ~r Ol 0

c ::J co CD

CLOSED

Happy Hour 4-8PM SS House Martinis S4 Glass of House Wine S3 Well Cocktails 20% off wine by bottle SI off Call liquor and bottled beer

Happy Hour 4-8PM SS House Martinis S4 Glass of House Wine S3 Well Cocktails 20% off wine by bottle SI off Call liquor and bottled beer

Happy Hour 4-8PM SS House Martinis S4 Glass of House Wine S3 Well Cocktails 20% off wine by bottle SI off Call liquor and bottled beer

Complimentary Wine Tasting featuring Grey Fox Vineyards 5-7

CLOSED

rl/C (7, • Lounge "u/Ul.8 t/l otl/w ~

Saturday March 2 nd

5-7pm, featuring:

6r{lyf'ox 11iniyard<111

Come enjoy many locally produced tapas & wines paired to perfection with our

complimentary tastings from local wine makers on Saturdays in February & March.

Live classical piano!

191 East Second St. • 530-898-9898

FACEBOOK.COM/CHICOCA • SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM FEBRUARY 25 - MARCH 3, 2013 13 I

Page 14: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

FEB 21 wednesdav

thursdav

B-DAY BASH! S~:A&x, CaPenJ and 8Ja

Pisces Paiama Partv

~ DJ2K, $1 cover Cake & Tunes! Starts at Bpm

~~...:..__..;;;:.;;;._~~..--

MAR 1 tridav Blue Merles -9pm

saturdav MAR 2 Club 01 Retro Future Ultimate Decade Dance Panv DI Set hosted bv DI JPEG

I 14 FEBRUARY 25 - MARCH 3, 2013

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 27rH

Into The Open Earth, Armed For Apocalypse, Io Torus 1078 GALLERY This Wednesday night is offering up a plethora of wonderful musical options to choose from for rock music, but the 1078 Gallery tour kickoff for Into The Open Earth gets the Synthesis vote. There's something about the cavernous acoustics of the art gallery that lend well to loud metal, and this bill has got plenty of it. The show begins at SPM, costs $5, and welcomes guests of all ages. Bring ear plugs.

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

25MONDAY The Bear: Bear-E-oke! 9PM. Cafe Flo: Jazz Happy Hour. 5PM. DownLo: NEW 8-Ball In-House League ask bartender for detail. Last Call Lounge: Karaoke. 8PM. Maltese: Open Mic Night - Com­edy. Signups @ 8, Starts @ 9. Mug Night 7-11:30PM. Woodstock's: Spelling Bee For the Grown Ups. 6:30-7:30PM.

26 TUESDAY lOOth Monkey Cafe & Books: Dreamwork Circle - Share dreams & explore techniques for discover­ing their secrets. 6:30-8PM. $10. The Bear: Bear Wear! 1/2 off while wearing Bear Wear. Mug Club 4- lOPM. Cafe Flo: Open Mic with Aaron. 7-9PM. Crazy Horse Saloon: All-request karaoke. 21+. DownLo: Game night with DJ Danny K. 7PM. The Hub: Flip It Tuesdays - 25¢ for a drink? If you win the toss, that's all it will cost! DJ spinning 90's and today's hits. 9PM-1AM.

LaSalle's: '90's Night with DJ Sana. 21+. Maltese: Karaoke 9PM-Close. Mid-Valley Baptist Church (Durham): Lonesome River Band; World-Class Bluegrass. Doors 6:30PM, Show 7-9PM. Studio Inn Lounge: Karaoke 8:30PM-1AM. The Tackle Box: Karaoke with DJ Shelley. 9PM. Woodstock's: Trivia Challenge. Call @ 4PM on date to reserve a table. 6:30 PM.

27WEDNESDAY 1 OOth Monkey Cafe & Books: Open Mic. Singers, songwriters, musicians, vocalists and comedi­ans. All ages welcome. 7PM. 1078 Gallery: Into the Open Earth (tour kick-off), Armed for Apocalypse, & Io Torus. Doors 7PM, Show 7:30PM. $5. The Bear: Trike Races. Win t -shirts and Bear Bucks. Post time 1 OPM. Mug club 4-1 OPM. Cafe Flo: Jazz Happy Hour with Carey Robinson Trio 5-7PM. Fol­lowed by Way Out Wednesday w/ The Blue Merles 7-9PM.

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 27rH

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • Crazy Horse Saloon: Wild dance lessons, mechanical bull, Crazy Horse Girls, DJ Hot Rod Ent. 8-lOPM. Chico Women's Club: West Afri­can Dance with Imelda Mata. Live drumming. Fun for men, women, and kids. 5:30-7PM. $10. Fol­lowed by Ecstatic Trance Dance. Live Trance music played by the TranceFormation Band. 7:15-8:30. DownLo: NEW 8- Ball Tourna­ment sign-ups 6PM, starts at 7PM. Duffy's: Dance night! DJ Spenny and Jeff Howse. 9PM. Feather Falls Casino: Dance Club. Dress to impress! 9:30PM. $5 cover includes one drink. Harlen Adams Theatre: Harlem Renaissance Rent Party. Dress up, have dinner, dance, raise money for The Bookstore. 7:30PM. $5. Joe's: Karaoke. 9PM to lAM. LaSalle's: Z-Rock Presents: Brass Hysteria & MIP. 9PM. $3. Laxson Auditorium: Chico Performances presents Calder Quarter - Classical & Contempo­rary String Quartet. 7:30PM. Maltese: Smashed Spelling Bee. 9PM.

Calder Quartet Classical & Contemporary String Quartet

LAXSON AUDITORIUM If you lean away from angst and more towards tranquility for your Wednesday musical appetite, make sure you don't miss the Calder Quartet performing at Laxson Auditorium. Hipster alert: the young instrumentalists are likely to perform their interpretation of the classical piece that backs the introduction of each character in the Wes Anderson classic, The Royal Tenenbaums. The concert welcomes guests of all ages and begins at 7:30PM with tickets ranging from $11-$25.

• • • • • • • • • • • • • Senator Theatre: Sound Tribe Sector 9. Doors 7PM, Show 8PM. $25 adv. Sierra Nevada Big Room: Delhi 2 Dublin 2013. 7:30-9:30PM. $20. Tackle Box: Beginners Swing Dancing Lessons. 7-9PM. Towne Lounge: Black Fong. 9PM. No cover. VIP Ultra Lounge (Inside The Beach): Laurie Dana. 7-9PM. Woodstock's: Trivia Night plus Happy Hour. Call @ 4PM on date to reserve a table. 8PM.

28 THURSDAY lOOth Monkey Cafe & Books: Chico Story Slam. Theme = "Hu­mility''. Tell a 5 min. story related to the theme. 7PM. Donations welcome. DownLo: Chico Jazz Collective every Thursday. 8PM. Graduate: Red Bull Movie Night. lOPM. Grana: Live jazz with John Seid & Larry Petterson. 5:30-8:30PM. Has Beans: Open Mic Night. 7-lOPM. Sign-ups start@6PM. Lakeview Restaurant (Oroville): Carey Robinson Jazz. 6-9PM.

SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

Page 15: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

SATURDAY, MARCH 2N°

37th Annual Bidwell Classic ONE-MILE RECREATION AREA If running's your thing, you won't want want to miss Chico's signature SK and half marathon through our beautiful lower Bidwell Park. The SK begins at SAM and the half marathon/relay at 8: lOAM. Registration is open to all ages and costs anywhere from $4S-$60 with a large portion of the entry fees going to local high school running programs. There's no registration the day of the event so be sure to pre-register at Fleet Feet before March 1st.

SATURDAY, MARCH 2N°

Adults Only! Skate Night CAL SKATE On Saturday nights when the sun goes down, the kids get the boot and the oldies take over the skating rink. For just six bucks, you and your 18+ friends can head down to the rink for some good ol' fash­ioned four-wheeled fun between the hours of9PM and 11:30PM. And without the chilluns terror­izing the rink, there's plenty of space for gramps to fall over all on his own.

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • LaSalle's: Happy Hour: Quasimofos. 6-9PM. Lost On Main: The Dancehall Featuring - XSample & More. 9PM-2AM. Maltese: Karaoke. 9PM-Close. Panama's: Eclectic Nights- Buck Night & DJ Eclectic spinning favorites of today and yesterday on the patio. 9PM. Quackers: Karaoke Night with Andy. 9PM-1AM. Towne Lounge: 47th Birthday Celebration starring Alex, Carlos, and Eva. Pisces Pajama Party: DJ 2K. SPM. $1 includes cake tunes. VIP Ultra Lounge: Acoustic Per­formance w/ Bradley Relf. 7-9PM. Woodstock's: SOTA Productions and Songwriters Music Guild present "Chico Unplugged" -Singer/Songwriter Showcase. 7-9PM. FREE

1 FRIDAY lOOth Monkey Cafe & Books: Writing Group - Write, share, and workshop your pieces. 3:30-SPM. The Beach: DJ 2K & Mack Mor­ris. 9PM-close. $2.

Cafe Coda: Cafe Coda: Rube & the Rhythm Rockers + Alan Rigg Trio. SPM. $5. Cafe Flo: Exquisite Corps with Tyler Rehm. 7- lOPM. Duffy's: Pub Scouts - Happy Hour. 4-7PM. Kelly's Tavern (Oroville): Kara­oke with Mora Sounds. 7-11 PM. LaSalle's: Decks & Drums. SPM. Lakeview Restaurant (Oroville): Carey Robinson Jazz. 6-9PM. Lost On Main: Fever Fridays w/ DJ Jigga Julee & guest DJ Freak­beatz. 9PM-2AM. Maltese: Drag King Show. 9PM. Peeking: BassMint - Electronic Dance Party. 9:30PM. $3-5. Quackers: Live DJ. 9PM T-Bar: Live music 7-8:30PM. Tackle Box: Live music with Jason Buell & Nathan Thomas. 9PM. $4. Tortilla Flats: Latin Nights. Espanol & English DJ dancing with DJ (El, Kora) de Chico. Towne Lounge: Blue Merles. 9PM.

2SATURDAY I OOth Monkey Cafe & Books: Knitting Circle. 2-4PM.

1078 Gallery: Aberrant Behav­iors - Comedy, Stand-Up, Improv. Doors 7PM, Show 7:30PM. $5. Cafe Flo: Bring Out Your Dead w! JeffE. & Friends. 7-lOPM. Cal Skate: Adults Only Skate Night. 9-11:30PM. $6. 18+ First Christian Church: The Chico High School Jazz Ensemble proudly presents its 15th An­nual Hot Chili/Cool Jazz Event. 4-9PM. $7/person. LaSalle's: 1980NOW! SPM. Lost On Main: Far Beyond Chaos Tour - Hellbound, Bloody Roots & Ancient Mariner. 8:30PM. Maltese: Live music with Lush Baby.9PM. One-Mile Recreation Area: 37th Annual Bidwell Classic SK & Half Marathon. SAM. Quackers: Live DJ. 8:30PM-1AM. No cover. Rowland-Taylor Recital Hall: Final Round of the 15th Annual Kruschke Piano Competition. 12PM. FREE Tackle Box: Live music with Dylan's Dharma. 9PM. Towne Lounge: Club 01 - Retro Future; Ultimate Decade Dance

Party. DJ set hosted by DJ JPEG. 9PM. VIP Ultra Lounge: Complimen­tary Wine Tastings featuring Grey Fox Vineyards with live classical piano. 5-7PM.

3SUNDAY 5th Street Steakhouse: Holly Taylor & Eric Peter Jazz Duo 6-9PM. 1078 Gallery: Music with Jeff Campbell. Doors 7:30PM, Show SPM. Crazy Horse Saloon: Sunday Fun day. DownLo: Open Mic Comedy Night.9PM. LaSalle's: Karaoke. SPM. Laxson Auditorium: Chico Performances presents African Children's Choir- Peace through Dance & Song. 7:30PM. Maltese: DJ JPEG-01 Sunday Social 3-7PM. Trivia SPM. The Tackle Box: Karaoke with DJ Shelley. SPM.

ARE YOU INTERESTED IN SOCIAL 0 We are currently looking for Social Media Interns to assist in client research, updates and more.

MEDIA? ARE YOU WELL-VERSED IN

FACEBOOK, TWITTER AND PINTEREST?

DO YOU LOVE MEMES? WE DO, TOO.

FACEBOOK.COM/CHICOCA • SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

If you're interested please contact Ashley Shaffer at [email protected] or by calling 530-899-7708. All applicants must provide a resume for this unpaid position.

FEBRUARY 25 - MARCH 3, 2013 15

Page 16: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

I t6 FEBRUARY 25 - MARCH 3, 2013

COMICAL RUMINATIONS Zooey Mae [email protected]

There's No "I" In Teamocil I'm not sure exactly why, but this last week was really rough. Maybe it was a bad choice to quit my anti-depressants cold turkey, or maybe I shouldn't have eaten three entire turkeys over the last five days. (That was a terrible joke. Don't hate me, I need my Teamocil). Whatever it was, I don't want to question it too much. I just know I'm tired of this week, and when my last class is over I'm going to Yosemite Sam my way home (with whiskey bottles instead of guns), and eat my weight in burritos. Let's

n

get this bullshit u§n on the road; I've compiled a pretty good/weird mix of topics for you nerds.

The following find is something I can only assume was an amazing mind-gasm that was borne of believing (like I do) that Red Bull-type energy drinks are gross, hot sauce is amazing, and sometimes a person just doesn't feel like drinking coffee. Enter DoubleKick Hot Sauce - a caffeinated sauce that, according to the website, "combines the best of Asian and Southwestern chili sauces, plus ginger and caffeine for an extra energy boost:' You can pick up a bottle at their website (doublekicksauce.com) for about $10 a pop.

In another stroke of pharma-brilliance, new "nanocapsules" can take you from sloppy drunk to meet-the-in-laws-sober in just a few minutes. According to io9.com: "a group of researchers have packaged enzymes inside a nontoxic, nanoscale polymer shell that mimic the body's natural alcohol-processing activities. They've been shown to quickly and dramatically reduce blood alcohol levels in

intoxicated mice, and show promise as "anti­dotes and preventive measures for alcohol intoxication:'

This new discovery raises all sorts of ques­tions, most namely how can I get my hands on some of those drunk mice????? Keep in

mind, I want them for scien-tific reasons only (see also: I will make them a little roller coaster and watch them ride it until they puke. I love you drunk mice!) These new magical anti-alcohol pills make me wonder if they might shift our ideas about drinking and behavioral

consequences. Can you imagine if you could get hammered at breakfast, then hightail it to school and be bright-eyed and bushy­tailed for your Existentialism class at noon? Reminds me of stories my EMT buddy tells me about hospital employees showing up painfully hungover, then hooked up to an IV of hydrating miracle solution and feeling right as rain by the time they clock in.

I should point out that this "nanocapsule'' technology will have practical applications that reach beyond this narrow scope. As io9 describes, they "mimic the function of the body's organelles;' which has never been successfully done before, so this is one area of the medical field to keep an eye on ... which isn't to say you should stop posting on Facebook about the "chemtrails" that the government is poisoning us with ... actu­ally yes it is. Please stop. Anyway, is anyone else hugely excited about May? Return of Arrested Development you guys, oh my GOD.

image source: nevernotanerd.com (teamocil)

SY NTH ESISWE E KLY.COM

Page 17: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

OFF MY LAWN! Jaimie O'Neill [email protected]

Cutting Edge Commentary Here in Chico, we pride ourselves on being an old-fashioned sort of place, a picture-book college town where there's an honest-to-god city center with stores run by local merchants and people still prom­

Best of all, however, is our return to more traditional forms of mayhem and murder. Unlike the urban areas where people mow each other down with assault rifles, glocks, and other 21st century methods of men-

ace, Chico is just enading the streets rather than strolling the impersonal aisles of the big box stores. Sure, more and more of those downtown

" Our young people one of many rural towns turning away from gun violence and toward more traditional ways

stores are shutting down each year, and it's probably not a particularly good idea to stroll those dim streets on Friday or Saturday nights, but that doesn't change the fact that Chico

have taken to arm­

ing themselves with

shivs before ventur­

ing out for a night of

of hurting one another; a kinder, gentler America where knives are the local weapon of choice. Our young people have taken to

h t . " eavy par y1 ng ...

is the sort of place that respects the past, attracting newcomers who want to return to simpler times.

It's Mayberry RFD, but with a college, a few real intellectuals, a bunch of organic food obsessives, and cops with more than one bullet in their pockets. Yeah, we've got our rubes, red­necks, and yahoos, but unlike the days when Chico was the butt of jokes like the one so often repeated by San Francisco columnist, Herb Caen, you no longer find Velveeta in the gourmet section of most of our markets. We've got a nice blend of sophistication mixed in with our rustic charm, much like Davis, our role model. We're open to people of other cultures and colors, so long as we don't get too many, and we take justified pride in how few college students we lose each year to binge drinking.

arming themselves with shivs before venturing out for a night of heavy partying. Unlike those hip city kids who wouldn't be caught dead without a nine millimeter in their pockets on a Saturday night, our young people know that when it comes to death-dealing fashion statements, knives are the really au courant way to go - a return to those thrilling days of yesteryear when our progenitors slaugh­tered one another without waking up

the neighbors with loud reports from large caliber handguns. Trendsetters in towns like Chico are reminding us all of how much more civilized it is to kill people who piss us off one at a time, with a blade, and a bit of that old-fashioned personal touch.

FACEBOOK.COM/CHICOCA • SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

PHOTOS BY JESSICA SID ON THE TOWN

FEBRUARY 25 - MARCH 3, 2013 11 I

Page 18: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

CHECK IT OUT! If you see yourself

pictured here you can tag your photo on our Life In

Chico Facebook page!

f acebook.com/chicoca

18 FEBRUARY 25 - MARCH 3, 2013

SCENE REPORT by Kenneth Kelly • photos by Moshiriously Photography

Pageant Dads: The Loveseat Diaries Feb. 16 1078 Ga\\ery

Valentine's Day has come and thankfully gone, but the rapidly rising Pageant Dads have left a tale of betrayal, love, redemption, and "baby mama drama'' in the hearts of the 100+ people that packed into the relatively small 1078 Gallery to catch "The Loves eat Diaries'.' The play - written, directed, and starring the Dads them-selves - played for one night only and left many audience members wanting more from the musicians-turned-actors.

The story follows lead guitarist and lonely heart, Ruth Wardwell. Ruth has been sleep­ing on bassist Craig D'Anthony's loveseat since his divorce. When he is accepted on "Blind Chance At Love," a trashy dating game show that tapes the same night as the Dad's upcoming Holiday Inn show, he is forced to quit the band. Drummer Hawk Mahalo suggests scouring the Yellow Pages for a replacement which gives them scumbag

butt-rocker Ronnie "Chili Dog" Thornton (Matt Shilts). As Ruth and the Dads try to fill their respective voids, they are only met with

disappointment. Ruth learns the women on the show are just actors, and he returns to Chico loveless and handless. Meanwhile, the Dads learn to despise Chili Dog for his ego and inability to not bang the wife of rhythm guitar-ist Tom Chaz.

Eventually, Ruth rejoins the band, who find him a date in true Valentine's Day miracle fashion, by searching the Yellow Pages for a hooker.

The show effectively incorporated a variety of mediums to weave a surprisingly cohesive and engaging storyline, though this is the Dads' first foray into writing for the stage. Dry, comic scenes were punctuated with film segments showing Ruth's hilarious audition for "Blind Chance At Love" and his sweet, goofy, and ultimately false date. And, of course, Pageant Dads played their brilliant brand of tongue-in-cheek, genre-bending rock and roll.

While "The Loveseat Diaries" lacked the grace of a more professional piece of theatre, no one seemed to care as indicated by the standing ovation the show received. The Dads and the supporting ensemble "embraced the slop" as Chaz put it, and what would have been a weakness became a strength. In a one-night-only show, anything might happen. The Dads and the audience came together in that one moment, like lov­ers do, and made something magical happen. And like a one-night stand, the Dads didn't call the audience again. Well, at least until they write another show.

SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

Page 19: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

SCENE REPORT words and photos by Bethany Johnson

Victor Wooten Feb. 18 Sierra Nevada Big Room

Immediately upon finding a seat in the packed house Big Room, the lights dimmed. I was happy that the show had been waiting for me because I had certainly been waiting for it! When I first saw Wooten's solo work (initially his cover of the song, "Amazing Grace"), I was floored. He quickly became one of my favorite musi­cians.

At the Big Room, all conversation and sound was replaced with silence and anticipa­tion. Long, droning notes from Wooten on cello and Dave Welsch on keyboard crept through the air, transform­ing the sonic atmosphere into that of a still, glassy pond. Then, with the addition of the other band members, the air was shattered by "A Woman's Strength;' written and sung by Krystal Peterson - a charming blonde woman who's slight build belied the force and soul delivered by her well-trained voice.

Their next song, "Brooklyn;' swaggered through the room like the Reservoir Dogs roaming the streets of Brooklyn. Wooten stepped to the front of the stage and laid down a solo that was like Gregory Hines stood up and started tap dancing. He did a small toss of his instrument, quickly spun around, caught the bass, and continued play­ing!

Wooten's style is impressive; hitting many notes very quickly, while still maintaining musicality. He simultaneously plays a rhyth­mic bass line alongside dancing melodies and fills in all the cracks with counter-melodies

and harmonics. He doesn't simply shove a bunch of cacaphonic notes at you to display speed.

The incredible skill of Steve Bailey, chair of the Bass Department at Berklee College of Music, was apparent by both the lyrical and proficient execution of his six-s tring fretless bass and by the obvious adoration from Wooten. The two joined in a duet that brought the energy of a carnival.

When Dave Welsch joined on the keyboard, the sound became a little too Electric Light Parade, but that was quickly replaced by one of the most synchronized drum duets I've seen. The drum sets ofJ.D. Blair and Derico Watson were positioned at opposite sides of the stage facing the center. They started with a rollicking call and response followed by an incredible unison attainable only by drum -mers with great skill and intuition.

It was evident that the musicians were having as much fun as the crowd. During one of Wooten's solos, others on stage took out their cell phones and shoved them in his face to take pictures.

I was completely entranced when he played a medley of Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah" and "Amazing Grace". For their encore, they played "I Want You Back. " What better than one of the greatest bass lines ever written to conclude this funky, bass-driven, and master­ful show?

FACEBOOK.COM/CHICOCA • SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM FEBRUARY 25 - MARCH 3, 2013 19

Page 20: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

For those that don't like the whirling dirvish of humanity that is Outside Lands or the throngs of granola earthies trying to sell you their lumerian crystals at Hardly Strictly, San Francisco offers a more intimate music festval. Noise Pop can be likened to Austin's South By Southwest and New York's CMJ Music Marathon, in that, in lieu of erect­ing four stages in a massive field and hoping for the best, the cities have carefully chosen to curate many separate musical experiences in a variety of different venues, quenching the thirst of multiple musical palates. The 21st annual Noise Pop Music Festival will be going on at 20 different venues in SF between February 26th through March 3rd. Bands of note playing include ! ! ! ( Chk Chk Chk), Amon Tobin, Rogue Wave, Starfucker, and The Fresh & Onlys, who graced the the stage at Duffy's Tavern in late July, 2011.

Toro y Moi with Sinkane at The Independent March 1st and March 2nd Toro y Moi can be best described as the danciest, sexiest el­evator music in human history, excluding of course, Aero­smith's "Love in a Elevator" and its corresponding music video. Chazwick Bundick has been spreading his infectious, groovy, moog'd out brand of chill-wave over four albums and three EPs since 2009.

The Sudanese-bred, United States-buttered Sinkane (born Ahmed Gallab) has had his hand in some of the sweetest

I 20 FEBRUARY 25 - MARCH 3, 2013

musical honeypots. He's been a touring musician for indie freak-funk juggernauts Of Montreal, dancey Polaris Prize­winning Caribou, and Brooklyn-based synth-psychers Yeasayer. In his self-titled album released last year, he ranges from a futuristic Curtis Mayfield to free form jazz. His afro-electro sound is contagious and bound to get any concert goer writhing to the beat. Both bands' entire discography can be listened to on Spotify.

YACHT at Slim's March 2nd This is by far the best bet of the festival. YACHT is a band, belief system, and business conducted by Jona Bechtolt and Claire L. Evans of Marfa, Texas and Los Angeles, Califor­nia respectively. These edgy, synthy electro-poppers force you to contemplate the meaning of existence and how you perceive your place in the universe while using their music to make the listener an uncontrollable hip-churning mari­onette.

The band is also live-scoring a heliocentric short film they made called Falling Into The Sun earlier in the day at the Swedish American Music Hall. The band meticulously curates everything from the light effects to the band merch with their own hands. The YACHT experience is com­pletely immersive; I myself have been pseudo-anointed by the intergalactic preacher Claire L. Evans, herself. Think

l . _,.- " 1 ',)

I I

the Talking Heads combined with the Svedka advertising campaigns of 2033. Check out their amazing music videos on You Tube and their entire catalog on Spotify.

Sonny & The Sunsets at Bottom of the Hill March 2nd I was introduced to Sonny & The Sunsets at Outside Lands in 2011 and was immediately captivated. They draw on a wide array of influences to amalgamate a beautifully catchy, fuzzy, poppy sound. You can get a swooning, fuzzed-out so's piano ballad followed by a tom tom-backed, light tropical guitar-based softy song about a journey to a planet of women where the term "death by snu snu" is evoked in your mind.

Sonny Smith, the band's frontman, song arranger, and lyricist, is extremely prolific with his songwriting. In 2010, Sonny invited 100 different artists to illustrate unique record covers for a fictional band with the intention of taking on 100 separate personas and creating a two-sided record. He completed the lofty task and presented the proj­ect at Gallery 16 in San Francisco and later at Cinders in Brooklyn. I can't really peg their sound with a clever quip so I implore you, dear reader, to check them out on - you guessed it - Spotify, where all three of their studio albums are available for your listening pleasure.

By David Neuschatz

SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

Page 21: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

PEDAL PUSHERS Erica Noel & Jess Sijan [email protected]

Bike Manners Our mommas always taught us to mind our manners. Reminiscent of the days filled with reminders to ask politely and graciously thank, we found ourselves wondering - is there such a thing as bicycle etiquette? After many conversations, a bit of research, and a few memorable bike lane run-ins, we discovered that bike etiquette does indeed exist.

How can the average Chico velophile cycle with more decorum? Fear not, for we have come up with the Seven Steps of Highly Effective Cycling, so you can be the fairytale pedal pusher you've always wanted to be!

1. Go With The Flow We get it, sometimes it's easy to slink by on the wrong side of the road to get to where you're going and we're occasionally guilty too. We've come to a mutual realization that every time you ride loops up the wrong side of the street, you are putting yourself and others around you at risk. This isn't Great Britain; here in America we drive and ride on the right side of the road. Pun intended.

2.Don't Hog The Bike Lane We both grew up with siblings, hearing "sharing is caring" chanted around our homes like battle cries. Well, that little rhyme applies to adults as well, especially in the bike lane. The proper positioning is on the left hand side of the lane. Riding further left in a bike lane keeps you out of harm's way, be it opening car doors or vehicles beginning to pull out of a curbside parking spot and into the lane. You are also in a better position to pass fellow cyclists.

3. Pass Politely We all ride at different speeds, some of us attempting to set land speed records, others smelling roses and taking in the sights - but no matter the pace, at one point or another we've all needed to pass someone. When passing, make sure you let your fellow road warrior know that you plan to pass or are

in the process of making your way around them. When you do, ALWAYS PASS ON THE LEFT, even if it means you have to creep into the traffic lane.

4.Slow Your Roll Trust us, this is a hard pill to swallow. Riding too fast for the traffic around you is risky business. We hate to sound redundant, but when you ride faster than is universally safe for everyone out on the roads, you are

putting yourself and others in danger.

5.Curb Appeal Bikes should not be on the sidewalk. Not even for a quarter of a block. Please don't be the d-bag who gets yelled at from storefronts or reprimanded by passersby. You, the girl on the big black cruiser who has made it a habit to ride on every sidewalk manageable downtown, you're giving the rest of us on

two wheels a bad name. Get off at the curb, walk your steed and don't cause havoc on the sidewalks!

6. Always Yield to Pedestrians. Susie Cagle said it best and it is a simple proposition. "Biking may in fact rule, but pedestrians are the real road royalty:'

7. Pay It Forward Last Sunday we were touched by humanity's grace. We had our bikes locked up downtown and when we came back to retrieve them someone had left us a random act of kindness! Delicately placed on both handlebars and seats were an assortment of flowers. Not only did we ride home with smiles, but we were both inspired by the yellow daisies to pay it forward. This is our seventh and most important step of highly effective cycling: do something nice for your fellow bike lover! Be it flowers on handlebars, stopping a bike thief, or helping someone change a flat, just do it. Let's encourage these kind gestures and be generous with our head nods and hand waves. After all, a strong commonality is often the root of friendship.

FACEBOOK.COM/CHICOCA • SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

NOW HEAR THIS! STAFF PICKS

Nolan "War Song" - Tomahawk

Bethany "Unbroken, Unshaven" - The Budos Band

Paige "Thrift Shop" - Macklemore

Tanner "Cirkus" - Gramatik

Katya "Dirty Laundry" - Bitter: Sweet

Ash "That's How Strong My Love Is" - Otis Redding

Dain 'To The Church" - The Equals

Michaela "Alex" - The Punch Brothers

Jake Coursen BottleRock Napa Valley Tuesday at 12:40pm via mobile · Like · IC 1

Rachel Davis You should do a preview of all the music festivals around the area. lt~s hard to find a list. Tuesday at 12:43pm via mobile · Unlike · ~ 2

Xela Young Cali Roots always. and this year SNWMF has Stie~phen and Damian Marley!!! Tuesday at 12:44pm · Like

Maggie Mello BOTTLE ROCK!

Tuesday at 12:52pm via mobile · Like

Joseph Michael Flores Outside Lands hasn 1t announced the ir lineup yet but I always love go1ing to OSL. Tuesday at 12:57pm via mobile · Like ·~ 1

Kelly Kamisky Worldfest!

Tuesday at 1:28pm via mobile · Like

Nick Ponce Reggae on the River is back and better than ever. The last few years have been awesome but it is back at its original location this year!! If you love life y1ou must come celebrate with us!! Tuesday at 2: 12pm via mobile · Like

facebook.com/ ch icoca

FEBRUARY 25 - MARCH 3, 2013 21 I

Page 22: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3

ARIES The worst thing we can do when confused or feeling under attack is to counter-attack as a reaction.

It is good to leave the fire when things are getting too hot. Most people will respect you enough to say to your face the things that are bothering them. Others will feel so disempowered as to use sneaky; passive-aggressive techniques to upset you. Pray for your torment­ers and wish them well. Making good karma for yourself is what this time is all about. Blessed are the peacemakers.

TAURUS Sometimes it's more important to

entertain than to be entertained. Your social life is blowing up this week. Monday and Tuesday have you feeling generous and playful. Overcome social anxiety by smil­ing and by being willing to listen to someone else's story. Helpful friends are all around you. We mostly share the same joys and frustrations as humans. Find more commonalities and less dif­

ferences with others. Honor your friends, co-workers, and loved ones this week.

GEMINI When you speak, you like to say things in such a way that they sound interesting. Small jesters of love will go a long way this week to make someone have a better day. Deal with family and domestic obligations early in the week. The full moon lets us know that every­thing is not perfect. Monday's balance between home and work can present challenges. Mercury's retrograde puts its own little twist on things. Keep a good sense of humor. "This too shall pass" is an

excellent mantra.

CANCER Stay conscious as to what is hap­pening around you. The full moon may find you in a flurry of fast­paced information and changes. Neighborhood gossip flies. Keep in mind that everything is subject to change during mercury retro­grade. By the weekend, everything gets happy. People feel more comfortable with taking things to a deeper level. Creative break­throughs are likely during this period. Travel and higher educa­tion are best pursued now. Good fortune is with you.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY: Chris Gray 2/25/65

LEO Life gets a little more intense this week. Control freak Leo-types need to be warned You can't pos­

sibly control everything. I think we'll just focus on breathing for starters. The themes of death, sex,

and other people's property. along with birth and occult studies, are the strongest themes. The full moon highlights finances, food, and how you'd like to present

yourself. Things begin to mellow out by the weekend. Hang out with older family members and don't sweat the small stuff.

VIRGO Purity and sanity may or may not go together. If you need to pick between the two, go with san­

ity. Nitpicking will drive you and everyone around you nuts. Get done with serving and learn about relating. The full moon in Virgo brings self worth to the forefront. It's time to be diplomatic. "Blessed are the peacemakers" comes to

mind as a good mantra. If you can't say something nice, it's better

not to say it. Mercury is retro­grade. Things that happen the next few weeks are rather fleeting.

LIBRA Work towards a noble goal or a positive cause. Charitable work will make for good karma. Mercury's retrograde in your

sixth house may indicate a need to monitor health issues. Serve oth­

ers with beauty. relaxation, and a willingness to harmonize. The full moon deals with unseen forces and personal secrets. Take some alone-time for yourself to check in and process the events of the last month. Seek resolution rather than retribution. Peace is an active

process.

SCORPIO It's time to make things happen. Your ability to teach, entertain, love, and be creative is empha­sized. Be in touch with your heart and allow your imagination to guide you through all of life's

offerings. The full moon begins the week in a way that activates your social life. Show kindness to yourself as well as others. The weekend is all about you with the moon in Scorpio. Your influence is strong, especially when it comes to art, sex, and uncovering the mys­teries oflife.

SAGITTARIUS Keeping things simple will help you to stay grounded. Some of you will consider moving during this period Others of you will be concerned with your parents and other family happenings. The full moon creates the classic Monday chaos at the workplace. Put Mercury retrograde in the mix and the potential for mis­communication skyrockets. By Sunday afternoon the moon will enter Sagittarius and you'll be able to reassess the events of the week and create a more flexible strategy.

CAPRICORN Seeing is not believing unless it includes touch, smell, taste, and sound Brainwashed people have a difficult time seeing the truth. Common acceptance doesn't

always coincide with common sense. You need to be thinking this week while everyone else can lose their minds. A search for deeper meaning is on most people's minds. Spiritual truth seems to vary from one culture to another. The full moon inspires a higher wisdom in you. Be curious and ask a lot of questions.

AQUARIUS The excitement of your birth sea­son has ended Now is the time for you to put on a new and bet­ter face for yourself. Focus on the voice and throat. Think in terms of the things you eat and how they might affect your health. Money, finances, and personal values are more likely to come to light dur­ing this period. The full moon could excite your libido and get you into a more intimate and sen­sitive environment. Wednesday and Thursday are your best days for mental work.

PISCES Happy Birthday! There is no mountain too high for you to climb and no valley so low you can't get down to it. You are all about taking action. You're feel­

ing more creative and at peace with yourself. This is a time when guidance from your ancestors counts. The full moon emphasizes romance, negotiations, and mar­

riage. The weekend looks excellent for travel, education, and discov­

ering a new culture. Be ready to show your good side. Smile more!

Koz McKev is on You Tube, on cable 11 BCTV. is heard on 90.lFM KZFR Chico, and also available by appointment for personal horoscopes. Call (530)891-5147 or e-mail [email protected]

•Fr'BB Loca.~ Pick. Up and Der •M.a.te-wide Ser.ice

··_ -10.-.ey Ba.ck GuaranEee

DHS •24 Hour Normal Tumar<ound

.c;?,l4 DiKounts vai la:bl • Call PJ.>s: Today

e•-.,n:s s HYUU 'SIR. !PC DO IE FIX IDS He :ea ~~kail"d' - IBM - CaiilllOn P.aiooson.ic - OJ.:Mtta - Epson J\:ppre - Xerox - NEC - 18.rother QMS - And Many Morefr _

I 22 FEBRUARY 25 - MARCH 3, 2013

M c11!dru.o - Frii::l:!!P' (530,J893-4253

113 . !I:~ A1Je. :Salil'.e: C 1 e ll Free m-BilJCl- !63 l -'399 I

FE I

SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

Page 23: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3
Page 24: Synthesis Weekly Feb 25-Mar 3