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Why We Are ThereFEBRUARY 2007

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SUBUDVOICE®

SUBUDVOICE

Mansur Geiger writes from Kalimantan…

I made a real effort to write about the opening of mydear old Dayak friend, Bapak Sumbin. We've all been sobusy and surviving the smoke, that it hasn't been a goodtime for writing about the feelings of why we are here etc.However, I think the story of this old man sums it up prettybeautifully.

During Ramadan this year, BapakSumbin, my original jungle guidefrom 25 years ago, loyal supporterand believer in our project, andfounding member of the YayasanTambuhak Sinta Foundation, wasopened.

At 85, ‘Bue’ or Grandpa, as we callhim, remains in excellent health andhas never been to a doctor. He pos-sesses an alert, intelligent mind thatsupports a witty and rather cheekysense of humour.

Over the years, I've shared somewonderful jungle experiences withBue. We have grown to be veryclose, and I always sensed that hepossessed his own form of latihancontact. He always had an uncan-ny ability to show up just when I gotto town. Once, without any plan-ning, we happened to bump intoeach other in the middle of the jun-gle, miles from anywhere, kind of likemagnets.

Having been part of our team for so many years, Bue waswell aware of Subud, the latihan, our mission, and whoBapak was.

On this particular day, Bue showed up at the office. Hehad just spent six hours travelling in the back of a pickupfrom his village. He came to report a gold rush on one ofour gold prospects. He was also frustratedand concerned regarding how the situa-tion up river was developing, and the lackof real welfare for his people.

He said: ‘I can't stop thinking about this sit-uation and the problems – if I lie down Ifeel wrong, if I stand up I feel wrong’.

I took him by the arm and said: ‘Bue, Ithink its time you join in doing our latihan.’

He immediately said: ‘Yes, I think you'reright.’

He went on to say that he had onlyfo l lowed us for so many years ,because he believes in God, andhe felt that we were the ones who

could bring real human welfare to his people.

So we arranged to do latihan the following day at 3:00pm. At eight the next morning, like a young boy Bue rungup and asked if he could come now.

‘No,’ I said, ‘at 3:00 pm.’

When the time came, Sumali, Didih, our project manager,and myself sat down on the floor ofour latihan room. I explained toBue that normally he should do athree month probation, but sincehe had known about Subud for solong, and the fact that he wasn'tfar from the hereafter anyway,then we would open him withoutthat requirement. I asked himwhether he really did want to beopened, and he wasn't just doing itbecause I suggested it.

His answer was very interesting:‘While I'm a devout Christian, Ibelieve all religions and nationali-ties are equal before God.’

I was quiet for a moment then said:‘I'll take that as a yes’

So we did latihan. Bue stoodpeacefully with his hands as if in aMuslim prayer and recited aprayer quietly.

Latihan was beautiful for us wit-nessing his opening - Sumali saidlater that he felt he had finally

arrived in Kalimantan.

We sat back down on the floor and I asked him if he feltanything. He instantly responded that he had felt the HolySpirit enter him and fill his chest. He added: ‘This latihan isthe real Grace of God, and although having experi-

enced this on several occasions during mylife, to be able to receive this at anytimeone wishes is truly a miraculous thing.’

He then went on to give his own explana-tion of how man is made of two parts: thepart made of dust - the physical; and theinner part - the soul, which can be filled bythe Holy Spirit. He explained that the prob-lem today was that the dust part of manhad grown so strong that the inner part nolonger was able to receive the Holy Spirit –not like the old days.

He said he was so happy because nowwhen he came to Palangka Raya in thefuture, we could do latihan together andreceive the Holy Spirit.

Pak Sumbin – 85 years young

This latihan isthe realgrace of

God

SUBUDVOICE PAGE 2

A Great ProductMaxwell Fraval, internationally respected osteopath,writes from Australia with some news that could have abig impact. A company that members of the Fraval fam-ily, Armytage family and the Yarralumla Foundation haveequity in, has come up with a pair of electronic socksthat have important health benefits, in a wide range ofapplications.Have they come up at last with that ‘winner’ product wehave all been waiting for, and that Bapak said we shouldbe aiming for? That is, a product that sells fairly cheaply,is of enormous benefit and will be very much in demand?

And not only could it benefit ‘all of mankind’ – it couldalso fund our Subud wings activity in the world.

The unique new patented equipment is called CirculationBooster Mobile (CBM). The CBM is a totally novel variantof a TENS-like machine which increases peripheral circu-lation and prevents deep vein thrombosis.

Visit the website at www.cbmobileglobal.com where youcan find details of how the control unit transmits mildelectrical impulses via conductive silver thread woveninto the sock applicators and see evidence of its efficacyas seen on darkfield microscopy.

The results of ultrasonography on the back of the knee willsoon be posted to the website. The ‘Evidence’ section ofthe website gives further details of the effects of TENS instress, arthritis and pain states. Interestingly, the unique sil-ver conducting wires that are woven into the socks, alsoexert an anti-microbial and anti-fungal effect in the areaof skin which the socks cover.

The CBM is now being marketed internationally and theYarralumla Foundation will pass on all the profit for sockssold through the Foundation to SIHA.

At the recent MedicaL expo in Dusseldorf there was verystrong international interest (potential distributors) and wealready have a subsidiary of Patterson Medical (a US-based medical multi-national)marketing CBM to physiothera-pists in France and Germany.

We have invitations to exhibit inIndia where 4000 vascular sur-geons will be meeting nextmonth and we will also beexhibiting in Arab Health expo inthe Gulf at the end of January.

Wide ApplicationThere is a very wide applicationfor the CBM socks (gloves to beadded in March next year)which are designed to be usedpractically anywhere. You cantake them on a train, bus orplane, use them at work oraround the house.

You can improve your circulationwhether sitting in a crampedplane seat or standing on yourfeet all day long at work. Thesocks can also help all sedentarypeople, especially the agedwho are not able to go for walkson a daily basis and can be usedfor post operative care oncepeople have returned home.

Further applications are for chronic cold hands and feetas occur in Raynaud's phenomenon; for post-operativecare of amputees; for the chronic circulatory problemsthat occurs in diabetes (e.g. there are over 48 million dia-betics in Europe). Needless to say we will be working onthe airlines whose passengers (especially those travellingeconomy) are at risk of DVT.

Buy Socks and Fund SIHA and the WingsIf we’re able to sell 500 CBMs to Subud members interna-tionally we should be able to fund SIHA’s needs for thenext two years as well as all Wings admin needs (exclud-ing SDI).

Maxwell will be making a powerpoint presentation at theAustralian Congress together with a DVD which shows adramatic reduction in red blood cell agglutination andthe rouleaux effect as well as improved venous return asdemonstrated with ultra-sound.

He hopes to give some of the international Subud broth-ers and sisters a copy of the DVD to help promote this intheir country on their return home. He also intends to pro-mote CBM at the ThankYou celebration next year.

The socks are being offered at present as a special intro-ductory offer of AU$199*, a saving of AU$50. All profits goto SIHA and the Wings. You can order your CirculationBooster Mobile from Yarralumla Foundation by writing to51 Learmonth Drive Kambah ACT 2902 Australia or by Fax +612 6231 9195) or by email to mmfraval@ozemail.com.au

We can only accept a cheque for A$199 drawn on anAustralian Bank or an International Money Order payableto Yarralumla Foundation. If you choose to use yourMastercard or Visa credit card, please let us have thename on the card, the credit card number and the expirydate. We will debit AU$199 from the card.

The price of AU$199 is approximately Euros119, US$156and GB£80. (See advertisement below).

Maxwell Fraval D.O., M.O.Sc.(Paed)

Hillside Health Centre E: mmfraval@ozemail.com.au

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HHooww ccaann MMOOBBIILLEE hheellpp??MOBILE has been developed as a registered medical device toimprove circulation in the legs, in particular, when travelling, at work or in hospital. Poor leg circulation can provide muchdiscomfort including swelling, pain numbness and, in moreextreme cases Deep Vein Thrombosis (DVT) which can ultimatelylead to death. By improving circulation in the legs, the risks ofthese problems are greatly reduced. MOBILE has been designedto be used almost anywhere and to ensure the next time youtravel, your time is more enjoyable.

HHooww ddooeess MMOOBBIILLEE wwoorrkk??MOBILE is a new and improved way to increase bloodcirculation. It is a registered medical device designed toimprove lower leg circulation. Using scientifically designedelectrical impulses from the safe battery operated,handheld controller, the unique silver-woven socksproduce nerve and muscle stimulation. Nerves arestimulated while muscles contract and release to pump the blood and improve circulation.

• Silver-woven socks look, feel and can bewashed like normal socks

• Unique silver-woven socks to stimulate nerve endings and muscles

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ENDORSED BY

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All profits go to SIHA and the Wings. Order from YarralumlaFoundation by writing to 51 Learmonth Drive Kambah ACT 2902

Australia or by Fax (+612 6231 9195) or by email (to mmfraval@ozemail.com.au). We can only accept Mastercard or

Visa credit cards.

PAGE 3SUBUDVOICE

•Completions & BeginningsThe World Subud Association has produced an excellentreport for the year 2005. It is very informative as well asnicely produced with photographs recalling some of thehigh points of the year such as the Innsbruck Congress.

All in all it is a very comprehensive report covering activi-ties in all fields including Susila Dharma enterprise, culture,the MSF and developments of particular interest in variouscountries.

Accompanying the report came this letter summing it allup from chairlady Osanna Vaughn…

2005 — a World Congress year; a year of completions andnew beginnings. Innsbruck brought together members ofall ages, cultures and nationalities, from every comer ofthe world. It was a celebration of exciting proportions, theexpression and presentation of all the activities developedand carried out since the previous world congress in Ball,2001, lead by Daniel Cheifetz as World Subud Associationchairman, and Laurencio Young chairing the executive.

A true reflection of our broad diversity, the event kept amultitude of members extremely busy during the longmonths leading up to it, not to mention during the con-gress itself. A wide range of workshop themes focused ourefforts and set directions for the coming years: apart fromworking on ways to improve our support and service toour members, understanding our presence in the world,the intention to interact and collaborate with other, like-minded associations, and the participation in interfaithevents and activities at the UN and other levels, have alsobecome part of the on-going agenda, unfolding in a nat-ural and vibrant way.

So, the year 2005 was inevitably dominated by all theexcitement that the world congress brought with it. Atthe same time, however, there were challenges to face.We were confronted with visa complications resultingfrom the growing complexity of our world: many whowanted to join us in Innsbruck were unable to make it; itseems that simply wanting to bring members of thehuman race together to celebrate is far from easythese days.

Response to Natural DisastersIt was also a year where we were called to respond tonatural disasters, which we did

Utami Geiger writes from Bina Cita Utama School inRungan Sari where the children have compassionatefeelings, ‘get up and go’ and intelligent planning. Theyare an example to us all…

We’d like to share with you a proposal that our studentsput to the school board. It shows how they engage andinteract with the local children, something that is part ofthe mission of Bina Cita Utama School.

Our students will start the program next week, with some priortraining from Sumali Agrawal, an experienced ESL teacher.

A proposal to teach english to local village childrenWe, (Adriani, Miranda and I (Chandra) have been think-ing about what we could do to help our village friendswho we play soccer or basket ball with almost every day.They have been coming for at least 3 years into RunganSari, almost every day now.

And all we do is play ball games. Over the last few yearswe have formed a friendship with all of them and wedecided we would like to do something for them. Not allof the boys go to school at the moment, but they have allbeen to SD so they can read and write. They are agedbetween 13 and16.

Our idea is that we could teach them EnglishWho: This class would be only for the village friends weknow and we will make that clear to them.

When: We propose to have classes 2 or 3 times per week. (ifclasses progress). Classes would be around 3:00, when theschool is empty and the BCU students have gone home.

Where: The main high school area, where we can use the pingpong table as a desk, because it is large enough for all of us.

What we would need: Permission to borrow the highschool hall, 10 pencils, 10 note books, 2\3 board markers,10 of the ESL books for beginners.

Advantages for them: This class for our friends will be com-pletely free for them, it could give them some hope fortheir future, and it’s always an advantage to be able tospeak English when trying to get a job.

Advantages for us: It will leave a fuzzy feeling inside of us.Ha ha. Also it will spread a good word about BCU and itbeing not only for rich kids, but it also helps the poor. Andwe think it would be a great learning experience for ustrying to teach and we will be able to feel how the teach-ers here sometimes feel.

We haven’t mentioned thisidea to the boys yetbecause we didn’t wantthem to get excited andthen for us not to be allowedto do it, so we have waitedto check with you boardmembers to see if we cango on and do it. Because ofthat we’re not absolutelysure on how many studentswe would have but definite-ly not over 12.

Because we may find someproblems, for their sake wewill make an agreement

that the classes will go for a month and if us or them haveany problems with the classes at the end of the month wecan easily just stop the classes or make fewer of them.

So the agreement would be: those who really want to doit for the learning must attend every class for that monthand so will we. If they continuously miss it, it won’t work out.

We really want to do this and help them so we wouldappreciate it if we can have your approval, but if notwell, you probably have your reasons. We are open toany suggestions to make our idea better or more effi-cient. Thank you all very much for your time. Thank you!Chandra, Miranda, and Adriani

Utami adds… The board has approved the proposal andwe will help them with the initial set up. We will also set upa roster of teachers/parents to be present in the nextroom during the lesson, as the kids thought their soccerfriends will be too shy with us around them.

They also said this will be a trial period until the holidaystarts. Indeed we hope it will work out well for both sidesand in January when school starts again, the program willhopefully continue.

I should mention that the kids thought out the plan andwrote the proposal by themselves.

From the Mouths of Babes

We have been thinkingabout what we

could do to help

our villagefriends…

completed on page 15

PAGE 4 SUBUDVOICE

What Does the MSF Do?

cont on p 5 >

wider context. I hope that members will further questionMSF and the work of the wings, for we learn and grow withnew questions. MSF growth and expansion depends onmembers’ understanding of its mission and work, for itsevolving task of providing for the future of Subud.

First YearAs my first year comes to an end, I have a fuller picture ofthe need to deepen development of the latihan in allareas, but one cannot help but be touched by thosepopulations suffering war, governmental chaos and cor-ruption, deprivation, dislocation, etc..

MSF faces numerous challenges. We areworking to approve and further support proj-ects that will provide latihan and other facili-ties in the Congo, Viet Nam, India, theUkraine, Colombia, Ecuador and elsewhere.

I have been surprised that the work oftenbrings the feeling that I am starting the lati-han anew. I begin to appreciate Bapak andIbu Rahayu’s talks, reminding us that our lati-han links practical work and develops con-nections to members—teaching us how torespond as we become aware of oneanother’s gifts and needs.

The urgency of this work was made clear asIbu Rahayu presented two questions after

her talk: ‘Feel thestate of the earth atthis time: Feel thestate of humanity atthis time.’

Continually shiftingour agenda inB a n g a l o r e , w eadded meetings toa c c o m m o d a t em e m b e r s w h ocame with propos-a l s f r o m I n d i a ,Ecuador, Columbia,Vietnam, Kinshasa,K i n g a n t o k o ,Matadi.

We also worked tostrengthen our con-nection and under-standing of how ourroles might be clari-fied as we work withWSA, SICA, SIHA,

SES and Susila Dharma.

What impressed me was how the board navigates a complexprocess of shepherding a group through the grant applica-tion into the final stages of setting up a stable Subud centre.

To those members who asked: ‘Aren’t you the guys whohold the purse strings and hand out the money?’ I tried togive a brief sketch of what we actuallydo. Giving a grant always entails due diligence; we needto know that the group has prepared to carry out a proj-ect with harmonious cooperation, engaging all members.

Our chair, Rohana Mitchell from Australia, leads a set ofqueries until we are all satisfied

Simone Paige writes about what she has learned sincejoining the board of the Muhammad Subuh Foundation(MSF). She gives us both the broad picture and then adetailed case study of how the board worked with theChennai group to refine its Subud house proposal. MSFdoes not just dispense money, it is deeply involved in thegrants it bestows...

I found myself in this work by accident because a friendcoaxed me to test for the position. Like many Subudmembers I knew that the mission statement identified MSFas the foundation that serves long term needs of Subud,but had only a glimpse of how the work toaccomplish the mission was proceeding.

As a newcomer to the board of TheMuhammad Subuh Foundation, I find I amcontinually discovering a larger Subudsphere of activity, a network of people andlatihan spaces connecting groups to manyforms of Subud outreach into the world.

Recognising the realities of places I once sawas remote, colourful internet impressions, I nowstand in awe of members travelling to theCongo, striving to bring food, water, electricityto areas where the reality of basic resources isa daily question, working in India to serve slumchildren, or forming a legal entity to provide aSubud house in Vietnam.

Over the past year Ihave witnessed thepotential value ofSubud in the world asit works to nurturecharitable, cultural,health projects andspaces where groupscan develop theirinner and outer formsof worship.

In BangaloreAt our meeting inBangalore, I was fullyi m m e r s e d a n dsomet imes over-whelmed by theintricate details thatarise in the processof overseeing MSFgrants. As a begin-ning board member,I like the challengeof learning howSubud projects operate around the world under suchdiverse circumstances, laws, traditions.

I have faced many questions regarding MSF’s priorities,funding, and its relation to other branches of Subud. (Isometimes dream of a computer chip for my brain thatwould fill in the many gaps). I confess that I have been aslow learner in regard to our efforts in distant countries.

As a teacher, I sometimes drew a blank when Bapak spokeabout enterprise for I was happily caught in my owngroove doing helper work. Having studied and taught cul-tural patterns, I am delighted that my current job demandsthat I reach around the globe and begin to relate to a

I have witnessed

the potential value of Subud in the world

The Muhammad Subuh Centre in Rungan Sari, Central Kalimantan. One of many projects around the world supported by the Muhammad Subuh Foundation

PAGE 5SUBUDVOICE

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that the project has been reviewed with considerablethinking. The preliminary planning, investigation, groupdecision making is examined as vital to the potential longterm success of a Subud centre. If Subud is to serve all ofmankind, MSF is charged with spending its resources wise-ly and furthering that mission to the best of its abilities.

The Chennai Subud HouseIn India we were able to work closely with the Chennaigroup to examine their application. Suggesting furtherreview and discussion, we solicited concerns and ideas ofmembers present so that the Subud house would trulyserve the full membership of Chennai.

In reviewing applications the board looks at a list of crite-ria. Discussing the proposal that Chennai had submittedto MSF required that we address many of these questions.Chennai had a piece of land in the southwest of the citythat was close to some members but far from others.

As in any group project, some dominant members wereeager to push forward with the project against some quietresistance. It was unclear if all the members of the groupwould make the commitment to travel to the new centre.

One attending member raised the question of child carefor the women. Although many expressed a desire to find ameans of transport to the proposed centre, there were dif-fering opinions on the location convenient to the members.

The result of our discussion was that theChennai members decided to test aboutthe location and the possibility of starting overwith a new project. Testing that they had agood site and with a group consensus theyimmediately returned to work on the plan,adding a plan to put a school for young chil-dren on the premises.

In two days the group moved toward a uni-fied support of the project. They saw the siteas one that would increase in value and drawmore facilities and also agreed on the needto increase the security on the premises.

They felt the need to cooperate and beginconstruction as soon as possible to guaranteethey could build on and secure the site. As wesaid our goodbyes, a new plan was being drawn withlarger spaces for latihan.

Chennai intends to submit this plan in a few months. Theboard will continue to review the plan via email andhope to support the project as soon as possible.

The Water TankWe later met with a representative of Subud Vietnam andworked through another set of problems on house owner-ship, as Viet Nam does not recognise the rights of religiousgroups to own property. An international corporate entityof Subud members based in Australia was set up to con-duct the project.

A representative for the group from the internationalboard said to me, ‘MSF is the water tank and we come forwater to make this project grow.’

‘Well, Minh Su,’ I said, ‘We may be the water tank, but westill have a lot of empty space in our tank and a budgetof $60,000 a year for Subud houses, so we have to takecare that our principal does not shrink. Of course, it ispreferable that it grow.’

He responded poetically in the form of a proverb. ‘Oh I see, hesaid, we cannot deprive the tree of water or its roots will die.’

MSF has now an endowment of under US$3 million and

distributes approximately $175,000 per year for severalefforts: translations of Bapak’s talks, the Care SupportTeam (formerly the Almoners), the archives, ISC work, theHistory of Subud, some youth initiatives, and other proj-ects related to the long term growth of Subud.

Perceiving that we were the water tank, Viet Nam was request-ing a large grant. The plan for the house called for a number offurther questions including the need for an impartial valuation ofthe house, a plan to include bathrooms and a plan to providetwo latihan spaces.

In this case Minh Su will return to the group with therequest for more information and modifications to theplan and will resubmit their proposal. Their representativealso feels they can find additional sources of funding, aswe suggested.

Because seven board members must follow the progressof grant applications and discuss information often byemail, we decided in Bangalore to ask national commit-tees, zone reps, and the International helpers to assist usin gathering information.

In their travels to groups they are in a position to help eval-uate the preparedness of a group to undertake a projectand to follow up on the progress of the group.

As the meeting schedule slowed a bit I had some time tolearn an Indian dance that we would perform at the clos-

ing ceremony. There were breaks from thebusiness of MSF – wonderful latihans, IbuRahayu’s talks and testing.

When Ibu Rahayu asked us to feel the state ofhumanity, we were made aware of the obsta-cles to peace. The problematic condition ofthe world underscores the crucial importanceof building the latihan, of developing ourresources as wisely as we can.

Our meetings spilled over for two extra days.We added meetings to discuss theKingantoko water project and to explore fur-ther cooperation with WSA, Susila Dharma,and the Wings to increase our capacity foroversight and support, and to eliminate dupli-cation of work.

I am fortunate to be forced to work in a new way and tofollow my testing, showing I was to be stretched like a rub-ber band to embrace a larger sphere.

There is much to be grateful for as we continually receivenew challenges in the work that Bapak has set out for usto do. In India, I remembered hearing in the seventieshow Bapak stressed a need to learn to work together.

Working on such diverse projects and problemsacross the globe I feel a sense of wonder that Bapakprovided a blueprint which serves us even now, inthis unanticipated era, allowing us to stay connect-ed and work toward a better future even in the dark-est of times.

And how fortunate we are that Ibu Rahayu is able tocontinue this work, that her presence inspires us tocome together to recognise how our latihan is ‘forall of mankind.’

The work often brings the feeling that I am starting

the latihan anew.

ILAINA LOOKING FOR WORKIlaina Lennard, former editor of SUBUD VOICE, seeks paid work,proof reading /editing. Email ilaine.l@ntlworld.comor Tel. +44 (0)1344 451851. Please note the name is Ilaine, notIlaina, when using the e-mail address.

PAGE 6 SUBUDVOICE

A FERTILE FIELDBEARING FRUIT

Ibu Rahayu's Quest ion and Answers with International Helpers, WSC Gathering

Bangalore, India, 6 August, 2006RECORDING 06 BLR 2

Final Translation by Raymond Lee

Question: I would like to ask something of Ibu. I know thatIbu is doing the names for Subud members, Subudnames, and I heard that Ibu asked the InternationalHelpers to do this duty, but I really don't feel preparedand I would like to ask Ibu if we can do something, pri-hatin or something to be trained for this, or maybe I mis-understood.

Ibu Rahayu: Well, I never said that I am not willing to giveSubud names anymore; I have not said that. However, Istill get many letters asking about personal problems,which I think can be answered by the internationalhelpers. So, as I want to cut back on that kind work, insome instances I forwarded the letters to the internation-al helpers. In some cases the international helpers couldgive the member the answer they needed, but in othercases, according to the members concerned, the inter-national helpers could not help.

For that reason, as well as the fact that there have notbeen hard-to-answer-letters lately, or when there havebeen letters like that, I felt that I had to answer themmyself. The reason for that is many members ask abouttheir spiritual progress now. In those cases I still answer theletters myself.

So, until now I still handle requests for a new name.

The letters that I do not answer now, or I that answer in adifferent way, are those asking about talents. Manyyoung people finish high school and do not know whatto do next. Many of them want to know what their talentis. I find that very hard to answer now. And I do not thinkthat the international helpers would find it any easier toanswer.

The truth is the reason Bapak wanted young people todo latihan was so that in the latihan they would feel forthemselves what they wanted to do and what their tal-ent was; that they would feel it for themselves. Then eachchild would know his or her direction. But, it seems thatthey still do not know. So, are the international helperscapable or willing to help these young people?

The way I reply to young people now is to tell them that Iam not able help; I cannot help them find their talent.And I recommend that they choose or feel for them-selves about the subjects that they have studied - whichones they were good at, or enjoyed doing. That can bean indicator to help them choose what to study next.That is how I reply to questions about talents.

Coming back to the question of giving names, indeedBapak gave me the job of choosing names for Subudmembers who want to have a Subud name. But thatdoes not mean that every Subud member has to get anew name. There is no need to force members or to tellthem that they have to have a Subud name. Usually, theperson concerned will feel if their name is not right forthem anymore as a result of their inner developmentfrom doing latihan. So, I ask the helpers not to keeptelling members to get a Subud name.

As for who will give the names when I have gone, I can-not comment, because in fact you can - helped by thehelpers if needed - find a name that is right for you. So inthe future, I hope that members will not ask someoneelse for a Subud name, but they will try to find, or choosetheir Subud names themselves.

Question: I would like to ask Ibu if it is possible for Ibu toclarify a passage from one of Bapak's talks. So maybe Ican read it, it is only a little paragraph. It was a talk whichwas given by Bapak at Briarcliff College in 1963 and itsays, ‘There can be no disagreements amongst usbecause what has been received in a latihan is a flow ofspiritual power from God to man, not to Mr. A, Mr. B orMrs. C but to man. Thus if you are in the latihan, you arenot in it as brother A. No. You are there as man, onemankind. If you are still like a separate individual in thelatihan you will not be able to receive rightly. Your naturein the latihan should be that of man, in general. It isessential that your inner feelings be as wide as this worldso that you can receive various things which are for man,not just for yourself. In this way you can know the secretsof anywhere and anyone.’

(Note: The talk was given at Briarcliff during the World SubudCongress on July 25, 1963, recording 63 BCL 10, availablein print in Volume 10 of Bapak's Talks, page 128)

I wonder if Ibu could say something on this please.

Ibu Rahayu: Well, even though that talk was meant foreveryone, everyone understands it differently. Each per-son has a different understanding. It is true that when wedo latihan we face the power of God and the purposeof the latihan is for a person to receive directly from thepower of God. After that, it depends on the individual.

People vary greatly because of their individual circum-stances. For instance, one person can neutralise theeffects of their desires and all they feel is that they turneverything over to God. But someone else is still affected,or easily influenced by desire. What is more, there aremany kinds of desires. One person may still have verydense material desires, while someone else has strongdesires that come from the vegetable forces, and so on.Naturally, the different situations people have withrespect to their lower forces create different reactions.This is what causes the differences between one person'sreceiving and another.

Ibu Rahayu

Talk

continued on p 7>

PAGE 7SUBUDVOICE

cont on p 8 >

being touched from within and experiences the move-ments they need.

Sharif: Ibu asked if you ever tried to do this? These mem-bers who have left, have you ever tried to help them feelthe latihan?

Question/continued: Yes, this particularly happenedwhen we were in Bosnia. There was this opening of more

than 30 people at that time and then, afterthat, some of them continued doing thelatihan, but some simply dropped out andwe haven't seen them. And that's why weare going there regularly to see what'shappening, and maybe they might comeback, we don't know exactly. But then wedid a latihan together and we could feelthat they were close to us, even if we did-n't see them physically. So, we could feelthere was something.

Ibu Rahayu: Well, that was an unusual situ-ation, it was unexpected. We were unpre-pared. In the case of Bosnia - I heardabout this problem at the time - there wereno men helpers, so there was no opportu-nity to arrange candidate meetings forpeople who wanted to become members,who wanted to join Subud. So, they did notgo through a preparation by listening toexplanations.

Well, going through a period of listening toexplanations is really necessary, particular-ly now. Bapak said the reason a long can-

didate period is needed is to allow a connection todevelop between the candidate and the helpers, withSubud members who have received this contact fromGod. The candidate needs enough time to get pre-pared and to get sufficient explanations about whatthey will need to do in Subud, what Subud is, and so on.

But in that case, there was no time for that and therewere no helpers, so the international helpers were calledin. Of course, the international helpers could not staylong. They were only there for a short time. So, beforebeing opened, the people who wanted to join Subuddid not get a good understanding, or a feeling of close-ness to us, the people who were going to open them.

That happened due to the pressure of the situation; thepeople (in Bosnia) wanted to know what Subud was like.People join Subud with varying goals. Some are just curi-ous; others really want to experience and understandSubud, and so on. Perhaps in that case the people whodid not find what they were looking for stopped comingto latihan. And the people who really want to follow thelatihan will of course keep coming and follow the Subudspiritual path.

Question: In the last maybe 15 years of my Subud life I'vehad this really tremendous urge to share the latihan witheverybody. And I find that this is true with a lot of otherpeople who have done latihan for a long long time. Imyself have written an introduction to Subud and evengiven a newspaper interview and it has had its rewards. Ire-read the talk that Bapak gave in 1981 in Sri Lanka andhe clearly says it is our duty that we should do this, and

So, how should we go about resolving problems?

Helpers' groups - the dewan of international helpers andso on - were set up for this purpose. They were set up sothat you would do latihan together and resolve problemstogether. You do that to get a common receiving - well,that is not essential because everyone receives different-ly - but so that your receiving will be balanced. Then youwill feel more or less what is right and what is not.

Of course, we cannot say who is right andwho is wrong, because only God knowsthe truth. All we can do is try to get close tothe truth. We try to approach the truth sothat if we go wrong, we will not go too farwrong. We will just be off by a little bit andwe still have a chance to put it right.

Is that what you were asking?

Question: Ibu please can you give us someadvice about people who have beenopened, received the latihan and then leftSubud and we don't see them anymore.Sometimes we feel them in the latihanwhen we do the latihan, although they arenot present. Can you tell something or givesome advice about these people, whichare quite a number. Thank you.

Ibu Rahayu: Naturally, anyone who comesto latihan but who does not feel anythingor feel a benefit from the latihan will quick-ly leave the latihan hall. If you just let themgo, they will never get to feel the latihan.So, if you can, you should hold meetings between thehelpers and the members.

At such a meeting, the helpers can advise membersabout the need to be patient in the latihan, because thelatihan does not start right away. It can take a while tostart. In fact, the latihan is waiting for that person toreach a quiet state and to quieten their thinking. Thetruth is the fault lies with that person, but of course, theyblame Subud or blame God.

For instance, in the first ten minutes of someone's latihan- particularly for a new member – ten minutes is not longenough to reach the part of that person that has to betouched, if that person is to feel the latihan properly. Thatis why that person leaves the latihan hall - they did notfeel anything. Well, what can you do? They do not thinkit is their fault; they got bored having to stay there withother people doing latihan.

It needs to be explained in meetings between membersand helpers that a member should become really calmand let go, because the contact is between the individ-ual and the power of God. So, if the person is not ready,or seems to be unwilling, naturally the connectionbetween their being and the power of God will not func-tion; the connection they need to make has been cut offby that person.

This means that the helpers need to have the patienceto do latihan with a new member until he or she can real-ly feel the latihan. For instance, you can do latihan sep-arately with that member until the member experiences

If we can reduce thoseinfluences –

do not stop them

completely,because

if you stop them

completely, youwill die…

PAGE 8 SUBUDVOICE

continued on p 9 >

he explains the consequences of not doing that. Myquestion now is: how far should we go? I am happy withwhat I am doing and I will continue to do this. But as abody, as a Subud Association or the internationalhelpers, how far can we go with this? Do we really needto make an effort, or do we leave everything as it is? Iwould like Ibu Rahayu to give us advice.

Ibu Rahayu: When we talk about letting go or surren-dering, it means that we only need tosurrender to God. What is needed isan opportunity. Even if we surrenderto God, but we do not have theopportunity we will not succeed. So, ifthere is no opportunity right now, butthe need exists... well you need tosurrender for longer. It depends onthe situation and the need.

When you talk about 1981, the situa-tion those days and now is different,meaning that society has changed.There are now so many groups ormovements that aim for or whose aimis to worship God. Whether thosemovements really lead people to Godor not, only God knows.

Today, it is as if people are competingwith each other as to which move-ment will be the most popular, orwhich one will give people what theyneed, and so on. For Subud, a time likethis when so many people need to findthe right way to worship God presentsan opportunity.

But is there an opportunity to do something there in SriLanka, or not? If there is an opportunity there, of courseyou should take advantage of it with a concrete initia-tive. What kind of concrete initiative? Well, the kind thatalready exists under SDI or SICA, an initiative by whichSubud can become known and someone who is not inSubud can be touched.

If people see Subud doing something concrete, it willcreate an opportunity for people who truly want to ded-icate themselves to God.

Question: Ibu, I would like to say thank you very much foragreeing to meet with us. It's a real privilege. For myselfmy question is how to be a wider channel in this role?We have all felt tremendous growth within ourselvessince we have been doing this job, but I am very awarethat there is plenty more room for growth. And that is myquestion - whether there is anything we can do, anyadvice Ibu has, or any testing that we can do?

Ibu Rahayu: As we know, in Subud there is nothing tostudy, there is no method, there is no teaching I cangive. I cannot teach you how to be good internationalhelpers, to be competent international helpers. As I saidyesterday, Subud is Susila Budhi Dharma. Susila BudhiDharma means that you have received something fromGod, a contact, and that you have been doing latihanfor a long time, so naturally, I would expect, your soulshave grown.

But, it is natural for you to feel sometimes that you have

not made progress, or that you are incapable of doingyour job. But in Subud you are on a spiritual path whereyou simply make yourself available, you prepare your-self. Then God will give you the guidance you need. Allyou need to do is carry it out.

How do you do this? Well, through letting go!How do you surrender or let go? Maybe you do not real-ly understand what it means to surrender or to let go.

When you face a situation, do not putyour self first. Turn the problem over toGod. Then a feeling will arise in you asto what you should do and how youshould be.

But if, for instance, you try to copy me,Subud will turn into the teachings of IbuRahayu. That is not permitted. Theteaching we get comes from God. Weshould never think that we are taughtby another person. You receive throughyour own surrender, so that what youfeel comes from Almighty God. If whatyou feel comes from your soul, it willhave an impact, it will influence the sit-uation - for instance, when you givesomeone advice, that person will feelhappy and satisfied after listening toyou.

So, what I want to say is do not putyourself forward. We surrender; wereceive whatever comes from or origi-nates from your soul, which comes viayour soul.

So do not worry about making your work more useful toother people. Surrender is what is needed. If you can dothat, what you do and what you say will be useful to thepeople who listen to you. That is your duty as a helper.You do not need to be an international helper; everyhelper needs to do that.

It is not easy to be a helper now. These days, as I justsaid, everyone wants to claim that their way is true.What about Subud? How can we demonstrate the truthof our way? Well, we have to do something that is differ-ent from other people. We have to do something that isGod's will.

If you ask what is God's will? Well, I just told you. We sur-render and we take an initiative. A real initiative basedon acceptance and surrender, so that all your behav-iour, all your actions will be protected by the power ofGod.

Question: Ibu, we are aware, some of us are aware, thatin my country and in other countries, on occasion themembers like to criticise other Subud members, and thatsometimes they even like to think that Subud membersare less able to work and do projects together thanother people outside of Subud. And that this is holding usback in our ability to grow. I wonder if you would like tosay something about this?

Ibu Rahayu: Concerning the state of Subud where peo-ple still criticise one another, as I said earlier, every indi-vidual, even though we are all in Subud, is different.Especially when it comes to making one's living.Members can only unite in the latihan

By doing latihanwe prepare ourselves tobecome a fertile fieldready to beplanted withsomething

that will bear a

beneficial fruit

PAGE 9SUBUDVOICE

when we worship God, because we all face that way(Ibu points upwards). We are all in the same position.But, when we come back down into this world, (Ibugestures from up to down) everyone has their own wayof thinking. That is why we do not get along when wework together.

This is not only a problem in your country; it is the generalsituation in Subud. Until today, we do not have a strongSubud enterprise that we can be proud of, an enterprisethat is proof of what God wants us to do. Why? The fault lies with us, with Subud members. Whensomeone thinks that they are good, they think that theyare the best. Others feel the same. When someonemakes progress, they think they have progressed furtherthan anyone else. So we cannot unite when we try toimplement or do what God wants. Most of us are still influ-enced by our desires, our thoughts, and emotions.

If we can reduce those influences - do not stop themcompletely, because if you stop them completely youwill die - just reduce them. You should reduce thosefeelings by giving part of those feelings of being right toothers. If you think, as I just said, that you have pro-gressed further than anyone else, you should give thatfeeling to others. In other words, to some extent youshould support other people's opinions. If you supportother people's opinions, then the decision you reach willbe a collective one which is free of the feeling thatsomeone won and someone lost. And the same applieswhen you have other feelings of this nature. That wayyou will not be carried away by feelings that make youfollow your low forces, because doing an enterprise islike doing latihan. [1]

Well, when members do individual enterprises it is differ-ent. You use your mind to think only about the businessand you do not have to care or worry about other peo-ple. In those cases, many members have succeeded.

But, when you think you are doing something for Subud,many problems arise. That is the reality. How will we everbe an example to other people, if in Subud we cannotestablish something that brings harmony and peace tothe world?

When you do business, use your heart, mind and desiresin a sensible way. Take into account the reality of devel-opments and events around you. Do not mix businesswith the spiritual, for instance by testing. When we useour heart and mind we tend to forget how far we can goin our attitudes and behaviour before straying from whatis right. Furthermore, an enterprise involves many individ-uals with different ways of thinking and whose lowerforces vary in size or strength. [2]

But, as Subud members, our hearts and minds are sup-posed to have been touched by the power of God. Assuch, if we can, we should reduce the action of ourheart, mind and desires by lending support to otherpeople's opinions, by working together and actingresponsibly. If you do that, your work will produce agood result and you will be free of feelings of winning orlosing. The link is the latihan; as Subud members weshould never be far from the latihan, because by doinglatihan we prepare ourselves to become a fertile fieldready to be planted with something that will bear abeneficial fruit. [3]

Question: I wonder if Ibu would like to give us someadvice to all of us please, how we could perhaps do ourwork better?

Ibu Rahayu: Well, I cannot tell you how to do your jobbetter. As I just said, it depends on your own prepara-tion. You have been appointed to act as internationalhelpers and every problem will end up with the inter-national helpers. So, you have to prepare yourselves.To prepare yourself means that you need to do latihanregularly and you should constantly ask God toreceive the guidance you need in your work. In truth,we do not need to ask for anything in latihan; if youare in a state of surrender and you feel close to God,it will work by itself.

That will be the case if you are ready. Then you will findthat everything you do will feel light. Do not think ofyour work as an international helper as a burden. Bydoing this work, you may find you are given an oppor-tunity to make greater progress yourself.

For example, if a group has problems and you areasked to help resolve those problems, you shouldresolve those problems in a real way by workingtogether. Your ability to work together is the necessarybasis to avoid working at cross purposes when we helpothers, or resolve problems. If we work together whenwe help others, it will help us resolve the problem. But,if you all have different opinions when you work, theresults of your work will not be satisfactory.

Even though there are women and men internationalhelpers, you should always discuss your receivingtogether so that you will find the proof of your receiv-ing in the results of your work.

As for making spiritual progress, from long ago Bapaktold us that in latihan there is nothing to study; we can-not study how to do it. Even though Bapak said that,many people still look for ways to make helperssmarter, or make people's souls develop quicker, bydoing this or that. If we believe we have found a wayto make our soul smarter, it only goes to show that weare not being guided by God - it is a human effort. Thereason is only God can touch your soul.

So, this is why each of you needs self honesty. Self hon-esty means that you need to be ready, ready in everyrespect. You must be a good example, a good exam-ple in all respects - in your behaviour, in the way youhelp other people, in everything that you do, so thatpeople will trust you. If people do not trust you, theywill not listen to you.

Is that all? So, work well. Do not think too much; just doyour jobs well. Behave like someone who has the quali-ties of susila, budhi and dharma. So, then whatever wedo we serve God, we are guided by God. God willing!

NOTES

[1], [2] and [3] Additional explanation by Ibu Rahayu added after thetalk was given.

PAGE 10 SUBUDVOICE

cont on p 11>

NOTE: Ilaina’s new e-mail: Ilaine.l@ntlworld.com

I N N E RV O I C E

Edited by Ilaina LennardInner Voice welcomes new stories and letters

AN INTERVIEW WITH LAILAH ARMSTRONG

By Harris SmartHarris Smart writes… A couple of years ago I produced alittle book with just three Subud stories in it. One of thesewas about Lailah Armstrong – a very remarkable story forseveral reasons – and we are now publishing it in InnerVoice in three episodes. This is the first...

Her story is indeed the strangest I have ever heard ofsomeone joining Subud. As she herself says it is like a‘tabloid story’. But it is also about someone who struggledthrough great difficulties to achieve a life that is fulfillingnot only to herself, but of value to others through her workin the International Child Development Program.

I was brought up in Yugoslavia. My father was Serbianwith French and German ancestry on his mother’s side,and my mother was born in Italy, of a Russian mother andItalian father.

My father was a well-known, successful, inter-national lawyer but not a communist. In hisyouth he was a close friend with Prince PeterII, the heir to the Serbian throne in the oldYugoslavia.

All this created difficulties. There were unex-pected visits, with unpleasant men interro-gating my father and ‘inspecting’ our homeand his office.

My mother’s friends were all Russian, peoplewho had escaped the revolution. My moth-er had been part of the upper class in Italy.Her father came from an old, Venetian noble family. Mygrandmother had deep faith in God. There was noplace for that background, or for God, in the YugoslaviaI grew up in.

I always had a strong sense of God. I was often praying,in a private dialogue with God. I had experiences of highstates of awareness. This led me to seek God because Iwanted to keep this good state. I started by searching inthe Orthodox Church, but that wasn’t alive enough.

I was sixteen when I came across Subud. I came toEngland to study English and there I met people whowere in Subud. The person who introduced me to Subudwas Matthew who later became my husband. He usedto mix with the foreign students, chatting up foreigngirls, I suppose.

He heard I was studying ancient Greek, and he askedme about the Lord’s Prayer in Greek and that’s how wegot started. I immediately felt drawn to Subud but I wastoo young.

The next year there was a Subud camp at Kenfield Hall,and though I wasn’t in Subud, I somehow managed to

get in, thanks to Matthew. It was marvellous. I met allthese young people in Subud and I couldn't wait to beopened but I was still too young.

The Start of all my TroublesWhen I got home, I started to talk about Subud and thatwas the start of all my troubles. My parents didn’t wantme to have anything to do with it, whereas for me it wasmore important than anything else.

I decided to run away. I managed to get enough moneyfor a ticket to London. My plan was to join Subud and doany work I could find to survive, but I made the mistake oftelling my best friend and she told my father.

Twenty years later I met this old friend and she asked meabout Subud, there was no group to support her.

To run away, I jumped from the second floor of my par-ents’ house in Belgrade and nearly broke my leg. It waspitch dark. I asked God to forgive me for hurting my par-ents, but ‘this is the only way, please help me’.

I had to walk two or three miles in the darkness, veryscared, I didn't even own a watch. I was carrying a bigclock and one little bag. They found me when I got to myfriend's house - my father arrived five minutes after me. Isaid, ‘I’m not coming home’, but I finally agreed.

I didn't speak to anyone for a week. My father took noticeof my unhappiness and wanted me to see a psychiatrist.They assured my father than I was fine.

They said I was a bright girl who was just a little over-enthusiastic about God. My father was happy and wemade a pact. If I stayed home and finished high school, Icould go at the end of that year - the following summer -to New York with my mother to be opened. And that’s

what happened. I was opened in New Yorkwhen I was eighteen.

I was full of happy expectation and hopedmy mother would also join. This was 1974. Shecame with me to the Subud house but shesaid she saw too many sad faces and heardtoo many sad stories.

In the opening I felt a vibration in my hands.It wasn't dramatic emotionally, but the sec-ond latihan was. I cried all the way through.It was a release of all the stress I had beenthrough with my parents and their oppositionto my joining Subud.

After the opening I was immediately different. It was as ifI had some sensitive tentacles that made me more awareof the atmosphere than I had been before. One funnything was that I had been notorious for not liking to eat,and now I became ravenous for food.

All was not WellI went back to Yugoslavia, but even though my parentshad allowed me to be opened, all was not well. Theywere constantly observing me, perhaps for signs of men-tal disturbance. I lost the relationship I'd had with them. I’dalways been the ‘good child’, the pride and joy, now Iwas the ‘problem’.

The helpers in New York had told me not to do latihanalone, but one night I woke up at two o’ clock in themorning in a latihan state, and from then on I did it regu-larly, twice a week when my parents went out to playbridge. Everything was fine except that once my parentsfound me asleep on the floor all dressed.

I started to talk about Subud very sincerely to everyonearound and lost all my friends.

It was as if I had some

sensitive tentaclesthat made me more aware of the atmosphere

than I had been before

PAGE 11SUBUDVOICE

•

cont on p 12 >

They could no longer relate to me and it was misunder-stood. My best friend was litrerally frightened and askedme not to talk about it.

For me it was finding the way back to doing the Will ofGod, to receive guidance, to surrender my will. That waswhat people couldn't accept – why surrender your will toGod? That was the problem in my family. ‘How can youknow the Will of God?’ And of course that’s a very rele-vant question.

I was too naive. I was speaking from a sense of bliss, butmy arguments weren’t clever. In that communist societythere was little understanding of religious or spiritual issues.

I had only one friend who understood. He admiredGandhi so we all called him Gandhi. He liked to fast, andhe listened to me. Later, when I ran away again, he gaveme the money to escape.

I finished my first year at university in Belgrade, and hadwon an award as best student of classics in Serbia. I wasoffered a place at Oxford and also at King’s College,London. My father agreed to finance my studies and Ichose to go to King’s College.

My teachers were happy with me. I was making manyfriends in Subud, and I moved out of the residential halland lived with Subud members.

Read more of Lailah’s story next issue. Of the difficultiesshe faced and how she eventually triumphed and is nowdoing her excellent work with ICDP.

Lailah Armstrong in her role as ICDP trainer

THE IMPORTANCE OFTESTING

Robert Millard from the Manchester Group in the UK, writesto remind us about some of Bapak’s guidance about test-ing, and urges its importance for us here and now...

Ever since joining Subud many years ago, I’ve been in thehabit of noting down bits and pieces from talks and test-ing sessions with Bapak: tests which have cropped up intalks, in books or on tapes. Also, I recently acquired abook from America called `The Tests of Bapak`.

Looking through this material, I was struck by the fact thattesting with Bapak nearly always involved the movementsof different parts of the physical body, the voice and feel-ing of the body, and this was the basic approach from1957 until his death in 1987. Bapak didn’t call it `body` or`awareness` testing - he just called it testing, because the

physical body is the instrument through which everythingcan be received and known, once it is brought to life.

Both Bapak and Ibu Rahayu have likened this testing togetting a latihan injection. Ibu Rahayu has gone so far asto say that to do this testing is a new duty for helpers toensure that this important aspect of Subud is passed on tothe coming generations and isn’t allowed to die out or beforgotten about. She suggests it should be done at leastonce every three months or so.

The purpose of this kind of testing, as explained by Bapakat various times, can be summed up as follows:

• as a marker to check on progress in the latihan; onwhich parts of your being are alive and able to respond

• to integrate the latihan into daily life and introduce theinner to the physical body

• parts of our being sometimes go back to sleep andneed to be re-enlivened from time to time

• as a spiritual injection or latihan booster

• to develop the latihan and align the inner with the outer

• this testing helps to form the jiwa

• each part of the body should be able to move sponta-neously, which then means it is `alive`. This process can beassisted by testing. We can help ourselves in this way,especially if our latihan has become too repetitive orstuck in some way.

Taking Testing SeriouslyI have the impression that, for some reason, we don’t takethis kind of testing seriously enough. Maybe there’s a mis-taken feeling that, because it seems so very simple, it onlyapplies to newer members and the rest of us don’t needit any more – or, is it just that we, as helpers, lack thecourage and confidence todo it? It is sometimes ignoredin favour of high-flown ques-tions `invented by the mind`which satisfy the curious buthave no practical purpose.This used to be discouragedas it can become self-indul-gent, and older and moreexperienced members areoften reluctant to participatein it.

There are many ordinaryactions which Bapak askedpeople to perform, first in theusual way and then movedfrom within by the latihan:

‘Walk forward in the normal way with your will. – Nowdon’t use your will or your nafsu, but follow the movementof your legs. Don’t walk until you are made to walk. Walkforward. Point to the sky in the ordinary way. – Now pointto the sky with your finger moved by the jiwa – showwhere is the sky?’

Always the people being tested were asked if they could‘feel the difference’ between the two ways:

‘When you say, `I look up`, what action happens whenyou say this? `I look down - I look to the left, the right –I look straight ahead, I worship God.` Only move whenit comes by itself so you know how far you’ve got. Howdo your hands move when you’re driving – cooking –writing. How do you put on your tie? How do you feelin your eyes if the person you’re looking at is clever?....is stupid?’

Both Bapak and Ibu Rahayu

have likened this testing to getting a latihan injection

SUBUDVOICE PAGE 12

cont on p 13 >•

And after a talent test: ‘Receive the movement of yourwhole being so you can carry out and complete thatwhich you have to do.’

These examples are, of course, just the very tip of a largeiceberg: there are many more in the same vein, as alllong-standing Subud members will know.

What We Should Be DoingAgain and again Bapak would say that this sort of testingwas really what we should be doing at our helpers’ meet-ings or that we could do this by ourselves or at home.Sometimes he linked it to enterprise:

‘All this Bapak does with you so you can do it for yourself.This is absolutely essential. That for as long as you practisethe latihan kejiwaan, you constantly check, you con-stantly examine and test your own self …. And this is whyBapak is constantly doing this testing with you: How doyou move if you’re doing this kind of work? How do youmove if you’re doing that kind of work …. if it comes spon-taneously from within, that is the experience you are look-ing for in enterprises. That is the meaning of enterprise.’

In another session he said: ‘This that Bapak has done withyou is something you can repeat, something you cantrain yourself to do, something you can practise everytime you have your helpers latihan together. The latihan isnot limited to one thing, or one type of movement …. thelatihan isn’t supposed to be one kind of movement whichgoes on and on and on always doing the same thing. Ifyou train yourself like Bapak said every time you haveyour helpers latihan then it will get smoother andsmoother and easier and easier for you to receive it.’

Once, after a session in which a man was asked how heshould act and how he should be if he was to makeprogress in his work, Bapak commented: ‘Don’t waste allyour time just testing things for other people that are real-ly not important, like should so and so move house, orshould he go from the East to the West … All these ques-tions are really unimportant. Then you actually waste allyour time.

Whereas what you should be doing is this kind of testing.To test yourself: in other words to test your own self; check-ing your own self, testing in the true sense of the word.’

Ending with a Rhythmic LatihanVery often, Bapak would finish a testing session by ask-ing the group to receive a rhythmic dance-like latihan,moving the neck, head, waist and every part of thebody including the voice, ‘so that your whole body willbecome alive.’ The use of the voice was important,‘…your voice also needs to move in order to bring yourchest to life and the feeling within it can also be puri-fied. Don’t restrain your movements in any way, so thatyou are truly free.’

Here is something he recommended to everyone as akind of pick-me-up: ‘Now follow the movements of yourlegs, your hands and your voice in the nature of adance but with a movement that is truly rhythmic andorderly. (Test). This kind of latihan you have just done issomething you can do anytime, at home, in your ownroom. For example if you are feeling depressed, have alot of things on your mind, or you are bothered bysomething, you can do this latihan. It will entertain you,it will lift up your heart and you will feel okay again. Youwill be able to sleep soundly afterwards. And never feelafraid, because God is always there, no matter whereyou are.’

T H E S U I THarris Smart writes..

We tend to think of Cilandak in Bapak’s lifetime as a spir-itual place. But we know that in Subud ‘spiritual’ does notalways mean lovey-dovey and sweetness and light.Often it is a soul wrenching, life-wrenching process: likebirth – a matter of blood sweat and tears.

It was also true that Cilandak was the place where the‘human comedy was writ large’ where our foibles wererevealed for all to see and where some very comicalhappenings were enacted.

In the following I intend no disrespect to those involved.The principal characters are long since dead. I hope thestory may amuse and reflect one tiny morsel of the com-plex, multi-coloured, multi-dimensional reality that wasCilandak.

There is a play by Samuel Beckett called End Game, andit includes two characters who live in rubbish bins. Fromtime to time they pop out of the rubbish bins and havedialogues with themselves or the other characters. At onepoint, one of these men tells this very, very funny joke.And the joke is this:

There is this man who wants to get a suit of clothes madeso he goes to see this tailor and the tailor takes very, verycareful measurements and tells the man yes, the manmay select some material and everything seems fine.

The tailor who is very suave, says ‘Yes Sir, come back in aweek and I will have your suit ready for you’.

The man comes back in a week and the suit is a totalmess. It’s the wrong material, the legs are too short, thesleeves are too long, the coat is too loose and the trousersare too tight. The man berates the tailor and says ‘This suitis nothing like the suit you were supposed to supply mewith, how dare you!’

The tailor is most apologetic and says, ‘Sir, I am terriblysorry, I quite agree. I see that there are some problems.Don’t you worry Sir, you come back in a week’s time andthe suit will be fine.’

The man comes back in a week’s time and the suit is stilla disaster. So once again the man is furious and onceagain the tailor is deeply apologetic and says ‘Please sir,just give me a chance to correct these errors’.

So the man comes back after another week and againthe suit is a disaster, but the tailor says that in a week’stime the suit will be perfect. So this goes on. The man isalways coming back, the suit is always wrong, the tailor isalways apologising and promising that the suit will beready. After seven months the man is so furious he is at theend of his tether and he says to the tailor, ‘God made thewhole world in seven days, and in seven months youcan’t even manage to make me a suit’. The tailor verysuavely says, ‘Oh yes sir, but look at the world, and look atmy suit.’

Well, this is a kind of funny joke, with a spiritual meaningabout life and how we might perceive the world and itgoes into the deepest spiritual conundrums like if there’s aGod who is All-Loving and All-Powerful, how can He per-mit this world in which we have suffering and war and ill-ness? Immense theological realms are contained withinthat joke. But I mention it, because it corresponds veryamusingly to something that happened in Cilandak.

Staying in the compound at that time, were twoAustralians. One was an old man called

PAGE 13SUBUDVOICE

cont on p14 >

Hanafi, he was a wizened, skinny little man but very livelyand energetic. And the other person was a strangewoman from Brisbane, probably in her mid-sixties or sev-enties, and she and Hanafi were always arguing witheach other. They seemed to have some feud which wentback to the earlier days of Subud.

Hanafi, what he always liked to talk about was Bapak onone of his earliest visits to Australia, when he stayed inHanafi’s flat, which was in the suburb of Manly in Sydney.And this was the most wonderful thing that had ever hap-pened in Hanafi’s life and he would often tell this story.

Anyway Hanafi kept talking about how he wanted to havea suit made. Tailors were very cheap. It made sense to getyourself a suit made. Hanafi went off and found out whereall the tailors were and then he got recommendations.Eventually a tailor was selected and he went to see this tai-lor in Block M shopping centre, not far from Cilandak.

Then followed this saga that was exactly like the SamuelBeckett joke, because Hanafi would go, he would bemeasured for the suit and the tailor would tell him tocome back in two or three days, and Hanafi would comeback and the suit would be completely wrong, it wouldbear no relationship to his measurements or the materialhe selected. So there would be a great feud with the tai-lor and Hanafi would go back and then in two days hewould go again, and again the suit was nothing like it wassupposed to be.

I think I stayed in Cilandak four or five weeks and this wholesaga of Hanafi’s suit went on day after day. We all followedthis saga with great interest, and eventually the time wasapproaching when Hanafi was going back to Australia andthere were only two or three days left, and the suit was stillnot made or not right. Was it ever going to come good?

Finally, finally the day before he was supposed to goback to Australia he came to the compound wearing thissuit, this beautiful suit, at last it had been finished. Andthen he turned round and on the back of the coat, lowdown on the edge and in bright red letters, were thewords ‘Made in Japan’.

I guess what had happened was that the bolt of materialhad been made in Japan, and the tailor had incorporat-ed the words ‘Made in Japan’ into the suit’s coat. Hanafihadn’t noticed this. He was so proud of the suit, that noneof us had the heart to tell him that emblazoned on theback was ‘Made in Japan’.

Sylvia des Tombe writes from Moscow…

The Ivanoffs have been in Russia for ten years and noware moving on. Here is the story of Françoise from France,who has been National Helper in Russia for the last fiveyears.

The familyQ. I understand your husband’s family is originally Russian?

A. Yes. Georges’ mother’s maiden name was Boursak,and they were from the south of Russia. They were aristo-crats and were very wealthy, but their fortune was lost inthe Revolution. They left Russia and went to Nice, inFrance, where there was a big Russian community.

Georges’ father was born to another Russian family. Hisgrandfather, who had lived in China since 1905, met hisfuture wife there, as Georges’ grandmother had fledRussia during the Revolution. When the grandfather died,Georges’ grandmother took her son by boat from

Hankou, where they lived, to Nice in France. It was in Nicethat Georges’ parents met.

During World War II (‘The Great Patriotic War’ to theRussians), Georges’ parents moved to Paris, where he wasborn. He was actually raised speaking Russian and knewonly a few French words when he went to school.

Coming to RussiaQ. How did you learn about Subud?

A. Georges told me about it before we were married. Hisparents and uncle and aunt were also in Subud.

Q. How did it happen that you came to Russia?

A. Before we moved to Russia, we lived in Paris. Georgeshad always been attracted to Russia and made severalbusiness trips there since 1982, including one family pil-grimage trip to Krasnodar and Donetsk in Ukraine in 1990.I, too, participated in this trip, and we even did latihan inMoscow with the very first Russian members, includingAdel iya Raevich. Later on, about eleven years ago, the

economic situation inFrance was quite diffi-cult, and Georges waslooking for businessconsultancy missions.The European UnionHeadquarters weresearching for experi-enced people whospoke Russian, andGeorges applied. Hewas accepted.Wewere very excited!Georges hadn’t spo-ken Russian for manyyears, so before wecame to Russia hetook lessons to masterthe economic vocab-ulary needed for busi-ness. Then, once we

were here, the language came back easily. Now he isabsolutely fluent.

Q. What were your first experiences here?

A. We lived first of all in Rostov-on-Don; that was wherethe first assignment here was. We were there one and ahalf years. It was quite an experience! Aline, our daugh-ter, was just 7 years old. It was very difficult and very inter-esting, but, in the end, it was a good experience. We hadto stay first in a hotel for several months, as people werenot used to renting flats to foreigners. The people werevery distrustful. They didn’t understand why we werethere. Maybe we were spies? What were we doing there?There was no Subud group in Rostov; I just used to do ashort latihan every day. It helped me a lot. I didn’t speakRussian, so I took lessons.

Subud in MoscowQ. When did you come to Moscow?

A. We moved to Moscow in October 1997. Two or threemonths later, I found a part-time job at the Embassy ofFrance. Aline was small, so I didn’t want to be away thewhole day. We put Aline in Russian school as we wantedher to speak the language and grasp the culture of con-temporary Russia. We moved three times in Moscow! Nowwe have been here eight years in all. Q. What about the Subud group here? A. When we arrived here, there was a small Subud groupwith Mirella and Adeliya. We used to do

Françoise Ivanoff

Françoise Ivanoff•

PAGE 14 SUBUDVOICE

•

latihan in Mirella’s shop. Sometimes the interna-tional helpers came. It was very nice. There was astrong feeling. The location was not really conven-ient: it was cold in winter and far away from thecentre, but we did the latihan.

Georges worked with the EU as a consultant in theenterprise development sector. He had free-lancecontracts for two years, for three years.

Q. I understand that there was a period in whichyou didn’t know if you would be able to stay?

A. Yes. In 1999, Georges stayed here two or three monthswithout an assignment. He really felt that we should stay.We fasted for a job, so that we could stay. Thank God, itall worked out.

We moved to a new flat, and, after a while, we foundanother place to do the latihan. First it was in a school,and then in the basement of a building. It was far from thecentre. Then we found another place near Beloruskaya.

At this time, Subud started to grow. We opened a lot ofpeople. The group kept growing. Andrei Babakhanov wasthe Chairman of the Moscow group. He did a great joband was very well organised. He found the place wherewe are now doing the latihan in the Soil Institute. It was inthe centre, so it was more convenient. It is fantastic.

When we read Bapak, he says that Subud premisesshould be in city centres. It is true. If we follow Bapak, itturns out well. When we moved our premises, more peo-ple joined and many stayed.

Then Ibu Rahayu came in April of 2002. That was a realexperience here. People who hadn’t done the latihan fora long time reappeared because Ibu Rahayu was here.Also, when international helpers came that happened.People appear to be doing the latihan at home andcome when they really are moved to. We have seen a lotof growth. We have a real group now.

Q. What are your dreams and hopes for Subud Russia,now that you are going?

A. My dreams? I hope that the management of Subudcan be such that there is a very effective committee, andthat everyone will closely follow Bapak’s guidance. If wefollow this, the group will grow. If we don’t, the memberswill leave. The committee needs to work together with thehelpers. They should meet every month, or do the latihantogether at least once. If they do this, then it will becomeeasier. That is very important. (I am sure this is the case ina lot of places.) Sometimes there are people with ambi-tion and passions. They want to change and do thingsonly by themselves. In fact, the solution is very easy: justdo what Bapak says. Also, read Bapak’s talks and do thelatihan. These are the most important. The rest is not.

Q. What have you liked most about Russia?

A. The fantasy. There are rules, but rules are here to beadjusted. I think the fantasy fits me!

I like the warmth of the people. I will miss this a lot!

And the snow. I love it as well. Maybe it is because it is socold that the people are so warm! That is the only waythey can survive in this cold country.

Kazan and St. PetersburgQ. Do you have any regrets?

A. I regret that Subud is not developing in St. Petersburgand Kazan. The international helpers opened perhaps 30or 40 people in Kazan. Now there are maybe only four orfive members, but there is not a group. They are not doing

the latihan together regularly. I am really upsetabout this. It should be arranged that the latihanbe done at last once a week. It can’t work if youdon’t do the things properly.

I have been the National Helper for the womenfor five years (two terms). I feel I could have donemore. But the distances here are so big! I wentfour times to St. Petersburg and twice to Kazan,and once a long time ago with Adeliya. At thenext national congress they should choose a

new woman national helper. It is hard, though, because there are no real groupsbesides Moscow. The helpers need to work on achievinga close feeling among the group members. I believe if wereally want to, we can find the time to do what needs tobe done.

Q. So now Georges is working in Kazakhstan and you areabout to move back to France…

A. I am thinking about why Georges and I are leavingnow. Of course there are fewer business support assign-ments because Russia is more developed; that is theouter reason. We simply can’t physically stay here anymore. But the real reason, I think, is that we are not need-ed any more. Subud Moscow is ready to stand on its ownfeet. Now people here are ready to develop by them-selves, and this is necessary so that they can grow withoutAunt Françoise and Uncle Georges.

Just do what Bapak says

Larissa Sunderland lives in New York City with her family,but spent 2 months in Brazil as a volunteer for A Child'sGarden of Peace. This is her description of her experi-ence. It carries a wonderful spirit of youth! A young per-son going out to encounter her destiny, a fresh whitepage ready to be imprinted by the world…

This summer, I had the opportunity to work with my aunton a community project she started in southern Brazilcalled a Child's Garden of Peace. When I committedmyself to living there with her friends from the communityfor six weeks, I was ignorant of the enormity of the impactthe summer would have on me.

The first week I spent in Santo Angelo was the hardestweek of my life. I was wrought with homesickness, and feltabout as able as a child - I had to turn to my aunt or to mynew friend Myra Margolin, who also works for the project,for help in communicating. I was unable to go anywhereby myself and was surrounded by complete strangers.

My diary entries from that first week were brimming withwishes for my family, my friends and for English. By the sec-ond week, I was incredibly close with my host sister, CarlaFrancielli. I suppose our first piece of real bondingoccurred towards the end of the first week when we dis-cussed (as much as my Portuguese would allow) an inter-nationally puzzling topic; teenage boys. She had been sowarm and welcoming the entire time I wasstaying in her house, but before that night we hadn't real-ly had the chance to just ‘hang out’ as girls. After that,things became a lot easier. She became a sort of transla-tor for me - she could better understand my Portuguese,and my ear accustomed itself to her way of speaking.

We went everywhere together, and spent a lot of nightssleeping in the same bed, because it was so cold. I stillmissed my family, but it was a less desperate sort of miss-ing, and I began to really enjoy myself!

Working for a Child’s Garden of Peace

cont on p15>

PAGE 15SUBUDVOICE

•

As soon as I started working at the school and at the localchurch with the children creating a garden with my aunt,working on a mural, doing some art projects and teachinga bit of English, I was absolutely smitten with the community.

The children were wonderful, always offering a kiss and ahug and willing to try a hundred synonyms on me until Iunderstood some piece of what they were saying. I feltcompletely comfortable with my host family and hadbecome better at developing relationships without lan-guage at my disposal.

The Recipient of SweetnessWhen I turned seventeen, my friends in Santo Angelothrew me a wonderful surprise party, complete with abeautiful cake, delicious finger food and luscious home-made candies in ornately hand-decorated papers.

It was so touching to see the work and time andmoney that everyone had put into this party!These wonderful friends of mine, who have so lit-tle, were willing to give so much, because they

are such loving people. It was so beautiful to be the recip-ient of such sweetness. They taught me so much about theimportance of opening your heart, because the rewardsare so great.

Living in Brazil, I learned tangible things like - somePortuguese, rituals of another culture and how muchenergy it takes to work with children. I also learned a lotabout myself, and about the human capacity to loveand to care for other people, regardless of language orcultural barriers.

I learned a little about how badly money and opportuni-ty are distributed. I saw people work sixteen-hourdays, sleeping only for a couple of hours in theafternoon, and living in horrendous conditions.

I saw my host mother working three jobs andwatched the family give up so much becausethey don't have enough money. When I went toSanto Angelo, I was willing to settle for the worldas it is. Now I know things need to change.

With thanks to SDIA electronic Newsletter.

Now I know things need

to change

Sharifin Gardiner, Chairman, Susila Dharma International, writes…We are delighted to announce that, following world wideadvertising and a selection process, we have offered thepost of SDI Executive Director to Virginia Thomas. ElevenSubud members inquired about the advertisement, andfour candidates applied. The Personnel Committee, andthen the whole SDI board unanimously agreed that Virginiawas the right choice. Virginia is already well-known to some of us as a former SDIDirector (2001-2004), and she is currently Chair of SDCanada. She is a respected development professional whohas worked for UN agencies, the Canadian governmentand international NGOs. She is also fluent in English, Frenchand Spanish. A second generation Subud member, Virginialives in Montreal with her daughter and husband and runsthe Community Action Services Alliance (CASA Consulting).We are confident that she will provide the fresh leadershipthat SDI needs at this stage of its development. Virginia has to complete two current professional assign-ments and plans to start work part-time in January, sharingresponsibilities with Rosanna Hille for several months.Fortunately Virginia will be visiting Vancouver in February forfamily reasons, which will provide an opportunity for her tospend some time there as part of the induction process.Virginia plans to attend the meeting in Lewes in Januarywhich will give her an opportunity to connect with many ofour members.Virginia has told me that she is excited about taking on this bigresponsibility, and as Chairman I am eagerly looking forwardto working closely with her for the rest of my term. I believethat SDI has a great future, and this is an important step for-ward. We are just instruments to carry out the process.

Welcome Virginia ThomasSince writing his article in the January 2007 issue, Samuel Lesleyhas received an offer of charitable funding from a member inBritain, Lewis Herlitz. Lewis writes: 'What about a club of 80,where 80 of us each gives you a grand? I'm up for being No.1.'Samuel would be very pleased to receive donations of this sort.The fallback position is for Samuel and his industrial partner Jonto convert their salaries into charitable donations to the project,effectively self-financing the project. Contact samuel@steyn.demon.co.uk

Completions and BeginningsContinued from page 3

through our own or other charitable institutions. Thisincluded working directly in the field, as in the case of theaftermaths of the devastating tsunami at the end of 2004,and the earthquake in Pakistan and Hurricane Katrina inthe U.S. the following autumn. In 2005, our hearts knewboth sadness and joy.

Following the congress, a new crew, including myself aschairlady, the deputy chairman Frederic Richard, andGarrett Thomson as executive chairman, is on board,ready to creatively take on the challenges that will arise.We realise that the vessel we are journeying in carries thetreasures of us all, and we aim to make it shipshape. 2006promises to see many great initiatives, as well as arenewed sense of purpose and a growing maturity.Taking the helm for the next stretch, I feel our sails are fullof potential and that our compass guides us true.

Wheelchair Project News

••

Mural at the Child’s Garden of Peace

Creative Jamboree7th to 14th of April at La Source, French Pyrenees:

info contact maya.bernardes@wanadoo.fr

The International Youth Travel FundApplication form is now finalised and available; for moreinformation please contact the SYA CoordinatorsRhyana Blakeley (rhyanablakeley@yahoo.co.uk) and Hamilton Manley (himanfam3@aol.com).Or contact your National Committee, ISC@subud.org or maya.bernardes@wanadoo.fr •

PAGE 16

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Over the long Easter weekend, that isWednesday 4th-Sunday 8th April 2007(changed from 5th-10th April), we shallbe exploring how to apply Bapak'sIdeas in Education, the Arts, and theHealth Care fields. This means his cos-mology, the four levels of being, andthe four natural energies (‘lowerforces’), and their related HumanValues. Much work has been done bySalamah Pope on this theme, and nowwe feel it is time to see how these ideascan best be applied in the world. It willbe held at Seven Circles RetreatCentre, Badger, California. If you are interested please contactSalamah Dick on sisal@cbn.net.idor Salamah Pope on abdandsal@ozemail.com.au

EASTER SEM IN AR ONBAPAK 'S ID EAS

SUBUD-INSPIRED SCHOOLSThis is the vision I intend education to facilitate:Every member of humanity, without exception,is given the chance to live a dignified, fulfilled,purposeful and compassionate life. Having established and run quality schools inIndonesia for ten years I am keen to work withothers who have a similar vision and appreciatethe vital role of education in alleviating povertyand suffering. The aim is to establish quality primary and secondary schools across the board, particularly in developing countries, using anentrepreneurial, exponentially self-propagating,self-sustaining system. Those interested please contact Frank Richardson at frankdrichardson@tesco.netor on +44-1603-864831

REMINISCENCES OF BAPAK AND OF MY LIFEA MEMOIR BY ARTHUR ABDULLAH POPE

SECOND ENLARGED EDITION NOW AVAILABLE FROM

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Rent-free room in East Finchley, London,for a mature Subud sister to live in as acompanion to Hariyanti Vittachi. Please write, with Subud references,to:

Hariyanti Vittachi, 31 Western Road, EastFinchley, London, N2 9JB, UK.