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Stainless Steel Chef again

Dharmi was hurrying home one night after work with his head tucked low. Although he did not lookrich enough for anyone to demand protection fees from, that was not sufficient insurance against beingbothered by Don Bozone's enforcers in this neighborhood.

Pay up. A voice came from around the corner where a side street joined the main street.

Dharmi froze. He tensed and prepared to run. Then he realized that there was no one talking to him. Hecautiously crept forward, hoping to avoid being noticed.

As he passed the side street, he saw four ninjas facing a man in a white outfit... wait... the man lookedfamiliar...

It was the Stainless Steel Chef in his cook's uniform!

Facing the Chef were four ninjas. The ninjas were dressed in the standard ninja outfits Dharmi had seenin Ace's illustrated kung-fu histories, except that they also carried round shields on their backs. Fromthe street light reflecting faintly off their heads which created some perverse halos, all four were bald.

A fight seemed to be looming. Most people would scurry home quickly and hope they were notnoticed, but Dharmi was keen on learning kung-fu. He figured there would be something exciting tosee, so he flattened himself against a nearby doorway and stood watching the proceedings.

You are the Stainless Steel Chef! A ninja pointed with his blade.

Very much so, the Chef replied and folded his arms. And why are you blocking my way?

You didn't pay your protection fees to Don Bozone.

You know very well that Hal's Kitchen is off limits to the Wise Old Men. I don't pay anybodyprotection fees on my turf, the Chef replied.

But this isn't your turf. You're standing on Don Bozone's territory.

I'm merely passing through to get home. You don't think I'd eat and sleep and defecate in my kitchen,would you?

If you're passing through, you have to pay protection fees, the ninjas insisted.

%^@W$ you! For what protection? Not having my olfactory senses assaulted by these garbage cans?The Chef waved his hand to indicate the uncollected trash lying around.

Protection... against... a ninja tried to think.

Against Don Thugetta! Another ninja cried out. We protect this neighborhood against his thugs!

I don't need protection. I can very well defend myself.

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Oh, yea? Where's your big chopper? A ninja asked challengingly. Let's see how good your powersof self-defense are.

Haven't got a blade on me, the Chef answered. How about you come to my cooking schooltomorrow, and I'll teach you folks how to make turtle soup?

Enough! A ninja turned his body slightly and pointed his sword straight at the Chef. If you're notgoing to pay our master's protection fees, we're going to show you a thing or two!

Hmm! The Chef replied and waved his hand in the ninjas' direction.

Aah!

My eye!

Can't... aaaaa... choo!!!

The Chef had moved more quickly than Dharmi could see. Was it magic? But the ninjas seemed toknow better.

Curse you! You said you weren't carrying weapons!

These are merely some peppercorns I took from my pocket, the Chef laughed.

Aaaa... aaaa... choo! A ninja sneezed. The man wanted to glare at the Chef, but his eyes were tearingover.

You... you didn't hit us with peppercorns. That... aaaaa.... aaaa... was pepperchoo!!!!

The Chef lifted a hand and twitched his fingers for all to see. You just encountered my Pepper SprayFlick.

Dharmi felt himself involuntarily take in a sharp breath of air. The Chef had such good kung-fu that hewas able to turn peppercorns into pepper while throwing them! How did he do it? Did he grab thepeppercorns, pulverize them between his fingers and hurl them out by flicking his hand?

But things were moving more quickly than Dharmi could think...

Take this! The ninjas cried out and several flashes of light streaked through the night air.

The Chef turned his head one way and swiveled his shoulders another way. Dharmi could not see himjerking his head, for it took place so quickly, although the Chef's hair moved in a way that suggestedthe Chef was also jerking his head in another direction...

The four metallic projectiles thudded into the wall behind the Chef.

The Chef turned back to face his attackers and rubbed his chin. Not bad. At least you keep yourshuriken stars sharp.

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Dharmi could not see the Chef clearly, but one of the ninjas spoke.

We were aiming to nick you only. Now are you going to pay up?

Nick me? No, I don't think so, the Chef laughed and stroked his left cheek. Two were clearly aimedat my head, and two at my shoulders. If I didn't need a shave after being up all day, I wouldn't have

allowed you to throw these things at me.

Lifting a finger, the Chef tapped his right cheek. You've done my chin and left cheek. Now there is theissue of my right cheek. It still needs a shave...

More flashes of light shot from the ninjas. The Chef leaped up and backwards, making a somersault inmid air as four more shuriken struck the wall behind where he was standing.

As the Chef landed with his feet wide apart and his body low, he cried out: My turn! The Chef thenmade some throwing motions, although Dharmi could not see any projectiles. Perhaps they were beingflung too fast, or maybe they were dark colored and reflected no light.

Aah! Ow! Erh! Eyaa!

How's that? The Chef laughed. You $%@^2ing %#$1%&s, want more?

Cursing and crying out with pain, the ninjas fled. The Chef continued strolling into the night.

Dharmi waited until both parties were out of sight before he crept forward and examined the ninjas'projectiles. He touched a star that was embedded in a wall, and shuddered when the sharp point almostpricked his finger. Then stepping forward, he came across one of the items that the Chef had thrown inretaliation. This was also star-shaped.

Dharmi raised his eyebrows and widened his eyes. This felt... blunt. It was hard, but nowhere as hard aas a metal blade. He picked up the unfamiliar item, and found it very light. It let off a familiar odor...very pleasant... now what was that? Dharmi had not often enjoyed good food in New Bath, and heracked his memories as he smelt the projectile again...

Oh. Star Anise.

Dharmi pursed his lips and looked in the direction the Chef had gone. He felt a sense of excitement stirwithin him. This Chef was worth learning from! Could he... could he visit Hal's Kitchen someday andask for an apprenticeship?