Sri Durga Mata - A Paramhansa Yogananda Trilogy of Divine Love

8/17/2019 Sri Durga Mata - A Paramhansa Yogananda Trilogy of Divine Love

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DD!C"#!$%

#his boo& is lovingly 'e'icate' to our (uru, Para)hansa *oganan'a, +ith a silent rayer that it bringabout a ne+ a+a&ening of his teachings, in the hearts an' )in's of 'isciles every+here, a rayer that

has gro+n +ith ever greater love an' intensity +ithin the heart of -ri Durga .ata over the )ore than0 years of service to her (uru an' to his rincial 'iscile, aasi Jana&anan'a

#his boo& is also 'e'icate' to our Belove' -ri Durga .ata by +e, her chil'ren, +ho have for yearslovingly &no+n her si)ly as 4.a4 5or the last 30 years other )ore than 0 years of service, she has'evote' her life to e6tensive ersonal counseling an' lea'ing grou )e'itations an' classes on theteachings of Para)hansa *oganan'ai an' Patanali

– The Editor

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P5"C

-ri Durga .ata has given over 0 years of her life in loving service an' obe'ience to her (uru !tis +ith hu)bleness an' gratitu'e, +e her chil'ren are ta&ing this oortunity, on the 1@@th anniversary

of Para)hansa *oganan'ai7s birth, to intro'uce her boo& to 'isciles every+here We sincerely hoeyou the rea'er +ill receive insiration, gui'ance, an' a large )easure of the siritual oy +e receive' inrinting it #he follo+ing is a siritual ourney +ith Durga .a, her (uru, an' his chief 'iscile, aasi

Jana&anan'a

Durga .as life 'i' not en' +hen .aster an' aasi left this +orl', though she thought it +oul'!nstea', her life too& a ne+ turn an' over the ne6t 30 years she beca)e )other, counselor, frien',sychologist, an' confi'ante, for .asters )any 'isciles 5or )any years her hone +as busy nightan' 'ay, for those +ho nee'e' hysical, )ental, an' siritual gui'ance -he has never turne' a+ay asincere aeal for hel, regar'less of the ersons race, religion, or gen'er Her love is al+ays there, herforgiveness is al+ays there, all +e have to 'o is as& -he +oul' often say, 4!t 'oesn7t )atter ho+ )any

ti)es you fall, as long as you ic& yourself u an' start again4.a +oul' say, 4He al+ays sen's )e the ones +ith the strong +ill, the rebels, the ones no one else

can 'o anything +ith4 ! too +as one of those rebels, +ho) .a has, after )any years, )anage' tota)e

Besi'es ersonal an' grou counseling, .a beca)e a )aster at )any 'ifferent art for)s

-he use' +ith great 'e6terity, +atercolor, oil, an' acrylics, +hich she li&e' the best $ver the years,she has co)ose' an' +ritten )any chants " fe+ aear in this boo& -he has sculte' beautifulstatues of our .asters, of aasi 8+hich .arorie Benau no+ has, of .aster, an' of the Belove'.other, -ri "nan'a .oyi .a .as +ritings are unarallele' in their beauty an' heartfelt 'evotion to.aster

.a never li&e' to se+, it +as te'ious an' ti)e consu)ing, she felt, but she taught herself, an'beca)e a )aster tailor an' sea)stress

%o can hol' a can'le to .a7s coo&ing -he can ta&e the blan'est foo', an' +ith a little touch here,an' a little touch there 8her 5rench touch, turn it into a gour)et7s 'elight

%o+, at the en' of the eleventh hour, +hen her life is fa'ing, a chil' here cries once )ore, for theten'er, loving ar)s of its )other to e)brace an' rotect, to succor an' love it as of ol' -he hasro)ise' that she, +ith .aster, +ill al+ays be there for us "ll +e have to 'o is call, 4.a, .a,4 an' she

+ill be there to hel us, to soothe us, so)eti)es to 'isciline an' scol', an' to lea' us bac& ho)e

! love you, )y .a, no+ an' forever )ore #hou art )ine, ! a) #hine

– Joan Wight Los Angeles

Dee!"er 1#,199$

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%All too o&ten 'e (raise dead saints and (erseute li)ing ones*% – Author un+no'n

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PBA!-H7- %$#-

#he +or' Master throughout these boo&s refers to Para)hansa *oganan'a, unless other+isein'icate' Para)hansa *oganan'a is a great yogi an' avatar +ho ca)e to ")erica in 192@ to srea'the light of :riya *oga an' the teachings of -elf=eali>ation He taught an' traine' 'isciles in this

country for )ore than 3@ years before his assing

-ri Durga .ata is a chief 'iscile of Para)hansa *oganan'a +ho serve' as -ecretary an' .e)berof the Boar' of Directors o& Sel&-ealiation .ello'shi(/ogoda Satsanga Soiet for )ore than 0@ years untilshe retire' in 19; -he +rote these boo&s in 190; an' 1909 -ince then, a nu)ber of the na)es ofersons )entione' in the boo&s have been change' as so)e have ta&en sannasi vo+s or have beenrena)e' by the Presi'ent, -ri Daya .ata, of -elf=eali>ation 5ello+shi/*ogo'a -atsanga -ociety

#hese ersons7 original na)es at the ti)e of +riting are use' in this )anuscrit

aasi is the na)e use' throughout this te6t in this )ost fa)iliar for) for Ja)es J Aynn, the chief'iscile of Para)hansa *oganan'a When Para)hansai gave aasi his vo+s, he originally besto+e'the title of a2arsi Jana+ananda , +hich is use' by -elf=eali>ation 5ello+shi ight after this na)ing,

Para)hansai 'iscovere' the fine 'ifference bet+een the )eanings of a2asi an' a2arsi , an' rena)e'hi) aasi Jana&anan'a -ri Durga .ata +as +ith .aster +hen he e6laine' the 'ifference bet+eenthe t+o na)es an' +rote 'o+n the .aster7s +or's< 4a2arsi )eans 7oyal -aint7, but +ithout the 7r7)eans 7:ing of the -aints,7 +hich )a&es a big 'ifference to )e for that is +hat ! feel he is4 -ri Durga.ata sai' that so)e !n'ians critici>e the selling of a2asi +ithout the 7r7, but that is the +ay .aster

+ante' it

.atai is use' throughout this boo& to refer to "nan'a .ata, because it is the na)e .aster gave irginia Wright, Daya .ata7s sister an' )e)ber of the Boar' of Directors of -5/*--, an' at theti)e of this +riting, she +as still officially &no+n as Mata2i Her na)e +as later change' by -ri Daya.ata to "nan'a .ata Mata2i is not to be confuse' +ith -ri "nan'a .oyi .a, +ho +as often referre'

to by her 'isciles as Mata2i , or .ahavatar Babai7s sister, Mata2i , as )entione' in the Auto"iogra(h o& aogi

.aster calle' -ri Durga .ata, 4.a Durga,4 for the first ti)e +hen he sa+ her in the !nternationalHea'?uarters in 1929 after she )ove' to .ount Washington #hey ha' )et for the first ti)e t+oyears earlier in .ichigan, her ho)e state He also so)eti)es referre' to her by the nic&na)e, 4Du4.aster hi)self chose na)es for three of the nuns in his or'er< -ister (yana)ata, .a Durga, an'.atai $ther fe)ale renunciants +ere &no+n by the ti'e of -ister after they ha' ta&en sannasi vo+s!n the 19@s, -5/*-- Presi'ent -ister Daya, as she +as &no+n then, after returning fro) !n'ia

+here she observe' custo)s there, chose to change the title of 4-ister4 to 4.ata4 in her o+n na)e an'the na)es of the other sisters +ho ha' &no+n .aster +hile he +as in the bo'y "t the ti)e these)anuscrits +ere +ritten, these na)e changes ha' not occurre'

#hroughout this volu)e -ri Durga .ata often refers to her fello+ renunciants by their firstna)es #his use of na)es +ithout their correson'ing fa'es is not )eant as any sign of 'isresect, butrather in'icates the close fa)iliarity the 'isciles enoye' +ith one another

#he rea'er )ay notice that the three boo&s share certain stories in co))on, +ith so)e slight variation or e)bellish)ent We have chosen to retain these in their original for) rather than co)ileor 'elete ortions !t +as originally lanne' to ublish these boo&s searately, as -ri Durga .ata ha'

+ritten the) !t beca)e necessary, ho+ever, to co)ile the three into one volu)e in the interest ofti)e an' econo)y

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Letter to Sri Durga Mata .ro! ara!hansa ogananda

June $4th, 1935 6o!"a, /o A!* E7* 8o*

Dear Durga,

! &no+ not +hen ! have been lease' +ith anyone ne6t to -aint Aynn ")ong )y )en 'isciles.r Aynn has the first seat in Heaven an' in )y heart an' a)ong )y la'y 'isciles you +ill have thefirst seat +ith -ister in heaven an' in )y consciousness *our behavior an' +or& has lease' )e )ostan' ho+ coul' an une'ucate' one li&e you beco)e so e'ucate' in everything ! have been the sa)e

+ay in life, rea' very little=but +ritten )uch "re you flattere' E no E but all this ! say +hat co)esfro) +ithin for the )ost +on'erful cooeration you have given 4.e'itate an' 'e'icate yourself to(o'F4 "n' behave best before yourself +ithin an' before all,

– ara!hansa ogananda

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Letter to Sri Durga Mata .ro! Dr* M* W* Le'is

Dear Durga,

5irst ! +ant to say that +e love you very )uch When the .aster as&e' you to ta&e care of )yan&le years ago ! felt the Divine .other in you at that ti)e "n' no+ it co)es out again so +on'erfully in the fine thing that you have 'one for us ! have al+ays thought of you +ith greatreverence for ! &no+ the )any sacrifices you have )a'e an' your obe'ience to .aster7s +ishes #hathas been an insiration to )e, to ta&e his 'isciline

! cannot forget your sacrifices +ith the .aster in the early 'ays "lso ho+ you built the churchesan' of course the her)itage an' other roects But to carry out .aster7s or'ers as to utting the5ello+shi on a soli' foun'ation, +as your greatest victory ! &no+ it +as a very 'ifficult assign)ent=but you 'i' it=an' that is +hat counts *ou have 'one an invaluable service to all of your brothers an'sisters, every+here

! have one suggestion E that you no+ rest a little )ore fro) your labors, +hich is certainly inor'er E you have 'one so )uch

$nce )ore Durga, than& you for ouring oil on trouble' +aters, by your gesture, born of theDivine Aove in you !f there is anything ! can 'o, you &no+, all you have to 'o is as&

"s .aster sai' to )e, ust before he left us, 4Doctor, as +e began in (o'7s Aove E let us finish4.y 'eeest love to you, Durga

– Dr* M* W* Le'is

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Letter &ro! 6rother Sarolananda 1

June #,1950 Eninitas

Belove' an' revere' -ister Durga<

5or a long ti)e ! have felt that ! o+e' you a note of gratitu'e an' love an' encourage)ent 5orthe )any &in'nesses an' siritual encourage)ent an' hel you have given )e

But heretofore ! ha' not &no+n ?uite ho+ to reach you +ithout causing e)barrass)ent or )oretrouble to you

Ha' it not been for your gui'ance an' &in'ness, an' that of aasi an' Dr an' .a)a Ae+is 8an'.aster behin' it all ! 'on7t &no+ +hat ! +oul' have 'one But no+ a bul+ar& of strength has co)e to)e an' ! &no+ ! can stan' unsha&en a)i'st the crash of brea&ing +orl's .y only a)bition is to servein a hu)ble +ay an' give (o' an' .aster7s love an' hoe an' encourage)ent to those that ! can

.y heart has gone out to you, for ! &no+ you have not ha' an easy ti)e of it But you )ay ta&eco)fort fro) the fact that out of those fe+ ure an' true souls +ho are +illing to suffer)isun'erstan'ings an' ersecution, 'oes (o' )a&e His saints, an' enfol' in His Aove

Ha' it not been for your long years of faithful an' 'evote' service to aasi an' .aster, -5)ight not no+ be in the stable financial con'ition it enoys

! salute you, an' sen' you )y love an' tell you that +e are one $ne in (o', .aster7s, aasi7s GDr7s love, an' the love of all those that love (o'

.ay you receive the strength to en'ure, an' )ay your heart be fille' to overflo+ing +ith His)atchless love an' co)assion

!n His love an' service,

– 6ro* Sarolananda

1 6rother Sarolananda aided Sri Durga Mata in ser)ing a2asi in his &inal das* e is sine deeased and should net "e on&used 'ith anli)ing (ersons 'ith the sa!e na!e*

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Contents

BOOK I

.y Aife an' -ervice to .y (uru

BOOK 2Biograhy of -aint Aynn< -iritual .illionaire

BOOK 3eflections of .y (uru, Para)hansa *oganan'a

ILLUSTRATIONSPhotograhs-heet .usic

htt<//+eb3net/+ight=.ail< yoganaIi6netco)co)Coyright 199 "ll rights reserve'

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Contents: Book I

+ART I

Chil'hoo' .e)ories 1 "ttach)ent to )y .other 1.arriage 1;Change of )y ating Habits 1;Hear' "bout .aster for the 5irst #i)e 1;.y .other7s -iritual 6eriences 19.y .other7s 5inal -tro&e< isions at )y .other7s Deathbe' [email protected] .other7s Death [email protected] .other Co)es to .e "fter Death [email protected] 5ather7s Death 21.y %ehe+ #e' 21

.y 5irst Healing fro) .aster Before He :no+s .e 22

+ART II-econ' Healing fro) .aster Before He :no+s .e 22.y 5irst isit at -5 Hea'?uarters 23.aster (ives a Dinner in Honor of .y Ho)eco)ing 23.y 5irst oo) at the Hea'?uarters 2K-leeing $utsi'e E #he "earance of a -aniar' to .aster 2K.aster (ives .e .y -iritual %a)e 20! Beco)e .aster7s Coo& an' House&eeer 20.y Personal 6eriences +ith .aster at Christ)as 2

.y 5irst %e+ *ear at .t Washington 29

.y Brother Dufour Aeaves .t Washington 3@

.r Darling Co)es to California 31

.y 5irst Picnic at the Beach 31 We eceive' %o -alary 31Housecar #ris 31

" 5e+ of .aster7s Prohecies for .e 3KBan?uets 3K.aster Plays the $rgans 30-an&irtan E .aster !ntro'uces .e as a .usician 30! Play the Big Dru) for the 5irst #i)e 30

-ister o+s 3$range obe 3Different Proects 3.aster Pro)ises .e to (o to !n'ia +ith Hi) 3.aster7s #ri to !n'ia 3.any Jobs 3;

#a .ahal eair 3;! "s& to 'o a Hun're' :riyas 39(rey Pulle' $ut of .y Hair 39.y Different !ncarnations 39Corrections 39

! #a&e a -ilence %ight 39

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+ART III! .ove to ncinitas K@! Buil' .y oo) at the Her)itage K@-ervices #o .aster in the Her)itage K@! .a&e a .attress for .aster K1

.y #ris Bac& an' 5orth to Aos "ngeles K1.aster7s ision of Jesus an' the Chalice K1Proects K1Aife 5orce #ries to Aeave .y Bo'y K3$n Han' +hen .aster is !ll KK

+ART I, .y -ervices to an' for aasi Jana&anan'a er .aster7s e?uest an' Wishes K0

Wearing a Housecoat K0aasis -ense of -)ell K0! Aearn to Drive K

.y Aifting Weights Beyon' .y -trength KBeach (oing Kaasi7s -ulies, -hoing K%ot "cceting .oney K-ervant K;

Just a House&eeer K;-ecretarial Duties K9Aaun'ry K9(ar'ening K9

"ccounts on 6en'itures K9 " Aesson on nselfishness 0@

sing eason %ot )otions +ith aasi 0@Col's Cure' 0@ " Aesson in %egativeness 0@ "s&ing aasi for Different Proect -uort 0@6ressions se' 01.aster7s 19K; Pre'ictions 02aasi7s 5oo' Habits 02.aster7s Aove for aasi 03.aster -ai' ! -uffer for $thers :ar)a 03.aster #ells .e of aasi7s Danger 03.aster #ells .e of His "runa !ncarnation 03

.aster #ells .e of His Worries 0K.y #al& +ith .aster in .arch, 1902 0K%e+s of .aster7s Passing 00

#rying to Bring .aster Bac& 05irst -igns of aasi7s !llness 0aasi (oes to the Hosital for the 5irst #i)e 0M=ay #reat)ents 0;ncinitas "art)ent 5ire 0;$ur 1903 #ri 09aasi #ells of (iving .illions to -5 09.en fro) !n'ia isit aasi 09

"t)anan'ai7s o+s @! !nterce'e for -5 @

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aasi7s -econ' $eration @aasi7s "art)ent at the Hea'?uarters 1aasi Buys a %e+ Car 1! (et $thers to Hel .e 2aasi7s #hir' $eration 2

aasi7s Aast Days 2aasi7s Passing K! Was "s&e' to Be Presi'ent 0! .ove Bac& to the Hea'?uarters 0

Winters at Borrego ! -erve .aster #hree *ears "fter His .ahasa)a'hi .y Drea) of 5uture Har'shis

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My Life and

Service to My Guru

Part One

.y )other7s )ai'en na)e +as li>abeth %ault -he +as born in -t Pierre, Cana'a on "ugust 2,

1;K -he )ove' to this country in 1;; at the age of t+elve #he to+n in +hich she live' is un&no+nto )e but it +as so)e+here in %e+ *or& -tate -he 'ie' January 2, 192;, in Detroit, .ichigan, at theage of 0K

.y father, "'olhe Dufour, +as born in -t Paul Bay, Cana'a, on $ctober 10, 1;K He ca)e tothis country in 1;;3 at the age of 19 He live' in the sa)e to+n )y )other live' .y arents re)aine'in the nite' -tates for the rest of their lives .y father 'ie' 5ebruary 2@, 190 at the age of 93 Botharents +ere of 5rench 'escent #his union brought five boys an' five girls into the +orl' #he firstborn +as a girl, !'a %e6t in line "rthur, "lci'e, 5ran&, ictoria, "lice, 5eli6, Ce'ha, rnest an')yself "n eleventh chil' +as born but she live' only three 'ays ! +as born on %ove)ber ;, 19@3 inthe uer eninsula of .ichigan in a village calle' !ron .ountain ! +as given the na)e of 5lorina

"lberta "t this +riting only three of )y brothers are alive, all )y sisters 'ie' +ithin their fiftieth year,e6cet Cecilia +ho 'ie' at the age of si6teen

When ! +as about a year ol', )y fa)ily )ove' to scanaba, .ichigan, in a 5rench settle)ent #he oulace so&e 5renchN hence, )y arents, esecially )y )other, 'i' not learn to sea& nglish,though )y father coul' sea& a little at his +or&

Cildood %e*ories

! 'on7t re)e)ber anything about )y chil'hoo' e6cet +hat )y )other tol' )e, that ! +as born sic&,as it +ere When sic&, )y )other trie' to ut so)e hot bric&s at )y feet, or +oolen soc&s to &ee )e

+ar) #he )inute her bac& +as turne', the +oolen soc&s +oul' lan' on the floor .y sensitive touch +oul' never allo+ )e to +ear anything +ool against )y s&in #he 'octor use' to tell )y )other,

4Why 'on7t you give her a iece of burnt toast an' let her 'ieO4 ! +as so 'ifficult to han'le !n lateryears, )y aunt use' to &i' )e saying, 4When ! +as carrying you to church to be bati>e' ! +as feelingsorry for your oor )other an' ! tol' your gran'father, 4!f only ! coul' acci'entally ust sli on this icean' ut this one out, it +oul' be that )uch less trouble for )y sister, but no+ ! a) gla' ! 'i'n7t slibecause ! 'on7t &no+ +hat your )other +oul' 'o +ithout your hel4

Being the youngest, ! +as al+ays given 4han'=)e='o+n clothes ! can see )y )other &nitting +hile she stoo' over the stove +atching the 5rench anca&es coo&ing -he &nitte' all our soc&s,)ittens, an' cas !t &et her busy trying to &ee her fa)ily in +ar) clothes

When ! +as about eight years ol', +e )ove' to -t -ault .arie, $ntario !t +as here that the +hole fa)ily ha' 'ihtheria an' )y si6teen=year=ol' sister 'ie' of the 'iseaseN hence, ! lost )y 4sitter4

! +ent to a ublic school We live' only a year an' a half in that to+n an' )ove' to Ai)oilue, uebec,Cana'a #here ! +ent to a 5rench arochial school .any ti)es ! ha' to +al& in the 'ee sno+ to

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school an' ha' to sit +ith +et clothes in class, too shy to tell the nun that ! +as +et

Attac*ent to %$ %oter

.y )other, being a very strict an' 'evout Catholic, +oul' go to )ass every )orning ! coul' not bearto see her go to church alone in the early, 'ar&, +inter )ornings so ! +oul' go along, fearing if

anything haene' to her ! +oul' never have forgiven )yself #hough )y )other7s health see)e'goo', no 'oubt it +as )y 'ee attach)ent to her that cause' )e to fear losing her !f ! a+o&e 'uringthe night !7' titoe besi'e her be' to see if she +as breathing an' returne' satisfie', or, before ! +entto be', ! use' to srin&le her be' +ith holy +ater, thin&ing that it +oul' &ee her fro) 'ying +hile !

+as aslee 5ro) an early age until ! +as ?uite a young la'y, ! 'i' not )iss one night of raying,4Please (o', &ee )y )other alive until )orning4 !n )y chil'ish heart an' )in' +as the thought thatif (o' +oul' &ee her alive 'uring the night, ! +oul' ta&e over the vigilance 'uring the 'ay ! use' toray that (o' ta&e )e first, but the thought ca)e if ! go first, +ho +oul' ta&e care of )other +henshe got sic&, for all )y sisters +ere )arrie' an' ha' their o+n fa)ilies, so ! tol' (o' to &ee )e untilshe left an' then he coul' co)e an' get )e #hat attach)ent very nearly ca)e to ass for after)other7s assing ! beca)e very ill an' )y life +as sare' by .aster7s intervention ! as&e' .aster

)any years later if )y 'esire to 'ie after )y )other +as= the cause of )y al)ost 'ying, he sai', 4*es4! )ention this e6erience later in this )anuscrit #herefore, every+here )y )other +ent ! +as sureto go

$utsi'e of )y brother, rnest, +ho +as only t+o years ol'er an' laye' +ith )e, ice s&ating,laying hoc&ey, etc, )y )other +as )y constant an' only co)anion -he +as all ! nee'e' an'

+ante' as a frien', hence ! never ha' a girl frien'

We sent three years in Cana'a !n 191, )y father left us in uebec to fin' a ob in Detroit, an' +hen he +as able to save enough )oney an' rent a house, he sent for us ! +as al)ost thirteen then,an' ! coul'n7t sea& nglish Peole +oul' +ant to tal& to )e ust to hear )y 5rench accent, but if !sa+ the) first ! +oul' go bloc&s out of )y +ay to avoi' the), for ! +as asha)e' that ! 'i' not sea&

as )uch nglish

! +ent to a (er)an arochial school in Detroit Because ! 'i' not &no+ nglish, the nuns ut )ein the secon' gra'e, but )y arith)etic +as that of the fourth gra'e, so one of the nuns too& ity on)e an' sai' that she +oul' &ee )e in the fourth gra'e because ! +oul' feel out of lace +ith thes)aller chil'ren -o)eho+ ! got along all right an' even asse' that year to the fifth gra'e +ith herhel !t +as a struggle an' it 'i' not ta&e )uch to )a&e )e sto school to hel )y )other +ith thehouse+or&

#he school la+s +ere not as strict in those 'ays as they are to'ay for ! +as only fifteen years ol' +hen ! left school #o hel +ith the e6enses, )y )other too& in so)e of )y brothers7 frien's asboar'ers ! use' to 'o the +ashing an' ironing an' the house+or& .y )other 'i' all the coo&ing

-o)eti)es thin&ing ! +as fooling )y )other ! +oul' loc& )yself in the &itchen an' 'o the fa)ily +ashing at night -he +oul' act surrise' the ne6t )orning We boile' our clothes on a gas stove, +iththe boiler sitting on the burner #he gas fu)es, lus the lac& of air in the roo), ! +oul' be 'eathlysic& ! +oul' have to go out for air several ti)es before the +ashing +as 'one But to )e it +as +orthit if )y )other +as surrise' an' lease'

.other an' ! +al&e' to the )ovie every afternoon +hen the )atinee change' We )a'e ourocorn at ho)e for it +as far better than the one +e coul' buy in the theater $n our +ay bac& fro)the sho+ +e +oul' 'ro by an' have our usual .utt an' Jeff sun'ae, then be on our +ay ho)e to)a&e suer

When ! +oul' see )y )other co)ing bac& fro) the store +ith big bun'les of groceries !7' run to

ta&e the ac&ages fro) her When ! +as a very young chil', ! +as as&e' by one of )y relatives +hat ! +ante' to be +hen ! gre+ u Without hesitation ! ans+ere', 4!7) going to be a -ister4

17



%arriage

When ! +as si6teen, ! +as engage' to be )arrie' to a 5rench)an But )y very +ise )other +ho &ne+hu)an nature +ell enough to &no+ that forbi''en fruit al+ays tastes s+eeter, also &no+ing )y &eensense of observation, +oul' ta&e one ba' habit of the boy an' )a&e u a story about a )an she

reten'e' to &no+ $ne by one, than&s to her +ise actions an' counsel, ! sa+ +hat he +as li&e an'bro&e the engage)ent

$n )y nineteenth birth'ay, ! +as )arrie' to a very fine )an His na)e is $rta ! Darling He +asa non=Catholic #hough ! never as&e' hi) to 'o this, he thought he +oul' lease )e by beco)ing aCatholic During the course of his learning, the riest tol' hi) that he +oul' have to have as )anychil'ren as nature +oul' rovi'e .r Darling tol' hi), 4!f ! have to )a&e )y +ife suffer havingchil'ren to be a Catholic ! +on7t be one,4 an' +al&e' out, +hich sho+e' his unselfishness

.y t+o brothers an' )yself after )arriage continue' to live +ith our arents, an' )y greatestlove continue' to be for )y )other .any years later ! as&e' .aster +hy ! )arrie' in this life against)y o+n natural nature He ans+ere', 4Because of the environ)ent you +ere in !f you ha' )et )e

before, you +oul' never have )arrie', it +as not necessary for you4 .aster also tol' )e the reason ! +as born in a Catholic fa)ily +as because of )y 'evotion .r Darling re)aine' the goo', generous,an' &in' erson he +as, as he rove' later to be

Cange o- %$ .ating /a(its

!n 192, )y brother rnest7s son, "lvin, +as a fe+ )onths ol' +hen he bro&e out +ith terrible ec>e)aon his han's an' feet an' face #he oor little fello+ suffere' terribly .y sister=in=la+, 5lorence, trie'everything in )e'icine, nothing see)e' to hel hi) #hen she hear' about giving hi) only orangeuice -he trie' this an' in a fe+ 'ays his face an' han's began to clear u consi'erably #his +as thebeginning of changing our eating habits, for +e thought if orange uice +ill 'o this for this little bo'y, it

+oul' be goo' for ours too #he four of us ate )eat, 'ran& tea an' coffee, ate s+eets, etc in one )eal, an' +e 'roe' it all in

the very ne6t )eal We 'i' not have the &no+le'ge of )eat substitutes li&e cheese, eggs, )il&, an' nutsto )a&e u for the lac& of rotein in the )eat ! re)e)ber +e +ere so 'i>>y )ost of the ti)e, +e 'i'not &no+ +hat to 'o, but +e 'i' not get 'iscourage' We soon hear' of 'ifferent courses in vegetariancoo&ing ! 'on7t re)e)ber no+ +hich courses +e too& but it hele' to balance our )eals, +ith roerfruits an' foo's our bo'ies nee'e' #hen our )in's beca)e urer an' our thin&ing change' to )orei'ealistic things of life

"fter +e too& the *ogo'a course, +e ha' )ove' fro) )y father7s house, ! beca)e very ill "fter)y healing fro) .aster, ! +as ?uite fanatical in )y eating habits, an' leane' to+ar's fasting ! use' tofast often an' for long erio's at a ti)e, ranging fro) three 'ays to as high as t+enty=one 'aysN hence,

+hen ! first ca)e to .t Washington in 1929, ! +as very thin .aster use' to fee' )e lots of rice an'curries, an' ! +oul' gain +eight, then +hen he left for a ca)aign, ! +oul' fast an' get thin again

"fter several of these inci'ents .aster as&e' )e, 4What 'o you 'o, ! fatten you u an' +hen ! co)ebac& you are thin again4 ! tol' hi) that ! faste' His voice ha' a forceful ans+er to that, 45asting isnot goo' for your health, your bo'y +ill be better +ith a little flesh4 -o ! stoe' fasting an' throughhis gui'ance an' training in a balance' +ay of living lost )y fanaticis) an' 'i' as he bi' )e 'o

/eard A(out %aster -or te 0irst Ti*e

$ne 'ay in 192, )y brother rnest ca)e ho)e fro) +or& an' tol' )e about a )an +ho &ne+ aboutso)e &in' of a Hin'u teacher that ha' co)e to Detroit .y brother tol' )e about the things he taught

an' the healing he erfor)e' !t fascinate' )e to hear about this -+a)i very ti)e )y brother ca)eho)e fro) +or& he +oul' tell )e the conversations he ha' +ith a .r Bone +ho +or&e' in the sa)e

18



'rafting 'eart)ent as he, an' +ho ha' ta&en -+a)i *oganan'a7s *ogo'a Course, but he +as not into+n at that resent ti)e $ne 'ay later )y brother e6cite'ly ca)e ho)e to tell )e that -+a)i

*oganan'a +as co)ing bac& to Detroit for one night7s lecture an' a''e', 7We )isse' hi) before, no+that he is co)ing bac& +hy 'on7t +e all go to hear hi)4 #he four of us, )y brother rnest, his +ife5lorence, .r Darling, an' ! +ent to hear this +on'erful teacher

.y first sight of (urui +as on Dece)ber 19, 192 We sat sellboun' ga>ing uon the )ostbeautiful )an ! ha' ever seen, in his orange robe an' long blac& flo+ing hair on his shoul'ers, an' hislarge lotus, 'ar&, e6ressive eyes He +as laying on his har)oniu), 4$h (o' Beautiful4 ! ha' neverhear' chanting before an' it fascinate' )e to the very core of )y soul 8#his very har)oniu) .astergave )e in 1932 ! ha' never hear' (o' e6resse' in this light before ! +as use' to thin&ing of (o'as Jesus an' +ithout hoe of ever reaching Hi) "lthough ! +as Catholic an' hear' about Jesus as theonly -avior, ! never 'i' have very )uch 'evotion to+ar's Hi) #his chant 'eely aeale' to )e an'gave )e a 'ifferent light on a tangible (o' .aster tal&e' about ho+ he ha' gone in a vegetablegar'en an' ic&e' a fresh cabbage an' ha' ta&en the heart of the cabbage an' ate it, an' ho+ 'eliciousan' ten'er it +as .aster 'i' not sha&e han's +ith anyone that evening, an' left the city

Brah)achari %ero'e +as the teacher in charge of the Detroit center at that ti)e He hel' theservices every #hurs'ay an' -un'ay nights #he four of us continue' going every +ee& thereafter "roun' Christ)as ti)e, the center gave a ba>aar We +ent to it, at +hich ti)e ! bought )y firsticture of .aster

!n early January 192;, +e hear' that %ero'e +as )oving to Aos "ngeles to ta&e charge of .t Washington #hat 192 Christ)as, .r Darling ha' given )e t+enty=five 'ollars as a Christ)as gift tota&e the *ogo'a course When +e hear' that %ero'e +as leaving in a fe+ 'ays, all four of us 'eci'e'to ta&e the course before he left, so +e coul' receive ersonal instructions #he night of January 0,192;, +e +ent to %ero'e7s hotel roo) an' he taught us all in one night the *ogo'a teachings Hesho+e' us the e6ercises an' techni?ue of concentration an' )e'itation !t all ca)e very natural to )e

#he first ti)e ! trie', ! +as able to 'o the lotus osture, as if ! ha' &no+n it all )y fife We 'i' not

receive the :riya !nitiation at that ti)e, ho+ever ! got that 'irectly fro) .aster at .t WashingtonHo+ever, %ero'e7s lans +ere change' an' he 'i' not leave until .ay 1929 !n the )eanti)e, +eractice' ! ha' a little searate closet ! )a'e into an altar in )y roo) #here +ere no ictures of the.asters then, only .aster7s ! sat at )y little altar in the closet, ! re)e)ber the first e6erience ! ha' !

+as sitting racticing the techni?ues ! felt a tre)en'ous stillness co)e over )e ! actually felt that )ybo'y +as not )a'e of flesh but of stone an' ! felt li&e a statue

We 'i' not see .aster again until "ril 2K, 192;

.y )other 'i' not try to 'issua'e )e fro) ta&ing *ogo'a #he icture of .aster ! bought +ashanging on our living roo) +all $ne of )y sisters=in=la+, "urora, )a'e fun of .aster7s icture #hisre)ar& hurt )y )other -he tol' )e not to leave his icture, saying, 4He7s too nice a )an to leave hi)

there to be laughe' at4 ! too& the icture to )y roo)

%$ %oter1s Spiritual .periences

! +as able to teach )y )other the *ogo'a e6ercises an' the techni?ue of concentration an')e'itation -he ha' reviously ha' a stro&e ! +oul' notice her stan'ing by the 'oor or leaning on thetable !7' as& her +hat she +as 'oing, she +oul' ans+er, 4! a) 'oing those e6ercises you taught )e4$ne )orning she tol' )e her e6erience saying, 7Aast night ! sa+ the blue s&y an' the heaven oen uan' ! sa+ the brightest light ! ha' never seen anything li&e that before, there +ere other very beautifullights too7 "t another ti)e she tol' )e that she ha' seen a )an in a light an' he ha' long blac& hair !&ne+ she ha' seen .aster an' he +as heling her

.y )other continue' to ractice the )e'itation but she 'i' not have )uch ti)e to 'o so, for !taught her on January th an' on the 22n' she ha' her final stro&e an' she 'ie' on the 2th

19



%$ %oter1s 0inal Stroke ,isions at *$ %oter1s 4eat(ed

#he )orning of the 22n', ! +as ustairs cleaning +hen ! hear' 5lorence call )e saying, 75lorina, your)other7 ! ran 'o+nstairs ust as )y father an' 5lorence +ere heling )y .other into a chair Herbright eyes +ere 'i) an' loo&e' so athetically at )e ! &nelt besi'e her an' lace' )y forehea' on

her forehea' an' )y finger at her )e'ulla, an' ! raye' ! 'on7t &no+ +hy ! 'i' that We then hele')y )other to her be' an' calle' a 'octor -he soon +ent into a co)a, but there +ere ti)es +hen shecoul' see an' hear us

$ne ti)e +hen ! loo&e' at her ale, toothless, thin face, ! coul' not see any rese)blance of )y)other7s for)er face ! ut )y fingers on her )e'ulla an' loo&e' at her again, an' to )y surrise, !sa+ her s)iling astral fa)iliar face loo&ing at )e #hough it only laste' a fe+ )o)ents, ! +as )a'ehay to see that beautiful face ! &ne+ an' love' so +ell

"nother ti)e +hile ! +as raying by her si'e an illu)ine' obect aeare' on the +all above her !coul'n7t figure +hat it +as !t loo&e' li&e a half of +alnut )eat !t +as +hite +ith a blac& sot on theto ! sa+ that sa)e thing later a secon' ti)e, only this ti)e the blac& sot ha' )ove' 'o+n belo+ by

the )e'ulla ery shortly after that )y )other asse' a+ay

%$ %oter1s 4eat

"t the ti)e of )y )other7s 'eath, ! 'i' not &no+ that she ha' 'ie' of a cerebral he)orrhage !f !hear', it )entione' ! 'i' not &no+ +hat it )eant -o)e ti)e later ! haene' to see the icture of abrain an' the ans+er flashe' to )y )in' +hat ! ha' seen t+ice as a illu)ine' obect an' +hat loo&e'li&e a +alnut )eat over )y )other7s be'roo) +all +as, the Aor' sho+ing )e the icture of )y)other7s brain an' the blac& sot on the to of her hea' +as the bloo' clot #he secon' vision +iththe sot near the )e'ulla sho+e' )e that the bloo' clot ha' )ove' to a vital oint of the brain an'too& her life

ight after the funeral ! burnt so)e incense ! ha' bought at the ten=cent store to get the o'ors outof the house .y father got the incense burner an' thre+ it out ! as&e' hi) +hat he +as 'oing, heans+ere' 4#his is 'oe4 Poor soul thought +e +ere trying to 'oe ourselves because +e ha' oine'

*ogo'a

"fter )other +as lai' a+ay, )y +hole fa)ily turne' against )e an' co)letely 'iso+ne' )e #hey trie' to )a&e trouble for )e because they &ne+ that )y )other ha' )a'e a +ill an' they +ante'it #hree 'ays after )y )other +as burie' +e +ere rearing to go to the #hurs'ay night )e'itation

We notice' that one by one )y brothers an' sisters +ere gathering in the house We thought they ha'co)e to see Da', so +e left When +e ca)e bac&, +e learne' fro) )y nehe+ #e' +hat ha'transire' !t see)e' that they ha' as&e' the la+yer to co)e to the house to have the +ill rea' +ithouttelling us anything about this aoint)ent When +e left they calle' the la+yer to cancel the )eeting,an' that )a'e the) very angry ! 'i' not &no+ about legal )atters then #e' +as +ise enough to hi'eour *ogo'a lessons so they coul' not fin' the), but they 'i' hunt the house for the +ill, but ! ha'hi''en that too

When +e got bac& )y father +as very angry 'ue to the fa)ily7s influence He tol' rnest to getout an' he loo&e' at )e an' sai', 4*ou too4 Without hesitation, +e began to ac& that very night .yfather sai', 4*ou 'on7t have to 'o that tonight4 #he ne6t 'ay +e rente' a house an' )ove' a fe+ 'ayslater

%$ %oter Co*es to %e A-ter 4eat

-oon after )oving, one night ! +as in )y closet )e'itating ! felt, )ore than sa+, )y )other in thecloset +ith )e -he +as so vivi'ly resent that ! coul' al)ost feel the blac& 'ress she ha' on !)entally tal&e' +ith her #he thir' night she ca)e, ! tol' her that her attach)ent to )e +as 'elaying

20



her siritual rogress as +ell as )ine ! tol' her to ractice the techni?ues ! ha' taught her ! +oul'too, an' so)e 'ay +e +oul' )eet in a )uch better +ay #hough ! really 'i' not &no+ the truth of )y

+or'sN still, )y heart, )in' an' soul &ne+ -he 'i' not co)e bac& again in that for)

"fter ! ca)e to .t Washington, +hile )e'itating ! sa+ a little lightN ! +ent u to )eet it, an' as !ca)e in contact +ith it, )y soul felt an' )y intuition sai' 4.other,4 an' still another ti)e ! +as again

'eely thin&ing of )y )other, an' before )y oen vision aeare' a baby in a )other7s +o)b When! as&e' .aster about these t+o e6eriences, he sai', 4#here is no 'oubt you 'i' contact the soul ofyour )other in that light an' later as she +as being reborn4 -o the Aor' &et )y ro)ise that +e

+oul' )eet in a better +ay, instea' of her re)aining boun' by this earth7s vibrations throughattach)ent to )e

.y )other ha' given the t+o houses an' everything to )e *ears later, +hen ! +as a 'iscile at.t Washington )y father +ante' to sell the houses but coul'n7t because they +ere legally )ine "ftertreating )e as they 'i', they +ere afrai' ! +oul' not sign the #rust Dee' over to hi), but they ha'nothing to fear fro) )e for ! ha' 'e'icate' )y life to (o' ! signe' the 'ee' an' sent it bac& to the)by return )ail +ith a nice note #hat +as the turning oint, they no longer hel' )e in conte)t

During the ti)e )y father live' in Aos "ngeles, ! +ent to see hi) once in a+hile #he sister=in=la+ +ho +as resonsible for starting the fa)ily feu' no+ tells )e ! a) the only one of the fa)ily +hore)e)bere' )y father +ith )oney gifts He live' +ith her an' )y brother until his 'eath

%$ 0ater1s 4eat

$n 5ebruary 1;, 190, ! +as in Borrego .y brother calle' to tell )e that father +as ill an' he 'i' not&no+ ho+ long he +oul' be +ith us on earth ! got to his house -atur'ay night, the ne6t evening He

+as hay to see )e ! as&e' this little toothless 93=year=ol' soul on his 'eathbe' ho+ he +as, an' heonly ans+ere', 4! 'on7t feel so goo'4 ! +as alone +ith hi) He began to get a little restless ! stro&e'his hea' +hile in 5rench ! reeate', 4-lee in Jesus4 -u''enly he loo&e' u at )e an' reeate' in5rench, Jesus, .ary, Joseh4 He &et reeating this When )y sister=in=la+ hear' hi), she +as

surrise' because she tol' )e that the riest ha' been there an' he +as trying to )a&e Da' say this very rayer, but he +as reeating it to hi) in nglish When ! sai' it in 5rench, Da' caught on an'reeate' it

" short ti)e later, ! +as still loo&ing 'o+n at hi) an' as he loo&e' u at )e, +as conscious thathe sa+ a light co)ing fro) )y hea' an' co))ingling +ith his light His face lit u an' for)e' intothe s+eetest e6ression ! ha' ever seen on his face ! &ne+ then that .aster ha' co)e through )e tohel )y father on his last ourney ! +as not the only one +ho sa+ this Darin Q-ister -hantiR an' her)other an' "urora +ere stan'ing in the 'oor+ay #hey too vivi'ly sa+ this lighte' face "urora tol')e later, 4He +as +aiting ust to see you4 ! ca)e to .t Washington later that evening ! +as tol' thatDa' reeate' his 4Jesus, .ary, Joseh,4 an' 'i' the sign of the cross all through the night long #o a

Catholic, this is consi'ere' a holy 'eath #hough ! 'i' not hysically ta&e care of )y father, still .aster'i' for hi) through )e +hat no=one else coul'N give the eace an' light to illu)ine his ath throughthe gates of life an' 'eath on 5ebruary 2@th at a)

"fter +e )ove' fro) )y father7s house, ! 'i' not see hi) again until he )ove' to Aos "ngeles !can7t re)e)ber +hat year but ! 'o &no+ it +as after 19K3 or 19KK

%$ Nepe' Ted

#he four of us, )y brother rnest, his +ife 5lorence, an' their son "lvin, .r Darling an' )yself an' #e' live' together in the sa)e house an' share' the e6enses #e', )y sister7s boy, ! ha' raise' fro)the ti)e of his birth ! also raise' his little sister fro) birth .y sister re)arrie' an' the stefather li&e'the little girl an' too& her at the age of seven, but he 'i' not li&e #e' an' abuse' hi) .r Darling +as&in' enough to +ant to a'ot hi)

21



%$ 0irst /ealing -ro* %aster Be-ore /e Kno's %e

-hortly after )oving ! beca)e very ill as reviously )entione' "t the cli)a6 of this illness, all thought! +as going to our .a&er #hat night ! 'rea)t +hat is ter)e' a real 'rea)N it +as )ore of a visionthan a 'rea) ! sa+ a +o)an, for the erson ha' long blac& hair an' a robe on Aater, ! &ne+ that it

+as .aster +ho ha' co)e to heal )e He sat on the chair ne6t to )y be', an' lifte' )e si'e+ays in

his ar)s so that )y heart +as even +ith his "s he 'i' so ! felt a +ave of electricity co)ing fro) hisheart into )ine an' asse' through )y +hole bo'y an' out of )y toes -lo+ly he lai' )e bac& ontothe be' an' ! as&e' hi), 4!7) 'ea'O4 He ans+ere', 4%o, you7re not 'ea'4 #he revious 'ay ! +as so

+ea& ! coul' not +al& to the bathroo) alone, but this )orning ! got u by )yself an' +al&e' ! +ason )y +ay +hen .r Darling sai', 4*ou are +al&ing by yourself4 ! ans+ere', 4#his is not )e, ! a) inthat bo6,4 ointing to the be' ! ha' ust risen fro) ! ha' a+a&ene' that )orning +ith theconsciousness that ! +as in a funeral rough bo6 an' ! +as still conscious of it +hen ! got u 5ro)then on, ! continue' to gain strength every 'ay

"ll of us +oul' )e'itate together, e6ercise, an' tal& about the lessons constantly, an' continue'to go to the center !n .ay 1929, Brah)achari %ero'e +as calle' to Aos "ngeles to be the resi'ent

teacher at .t Washington because the lea'er, -+a)i Dhiranan'a, ha' left the fol' of his (uru .astercontinue' his ca)aigns Before leaving, %ero'e )a'e )e the treasurer of the *ogo'a center an' incharge of hol'ing )e'itations ! beca)e too ill to continue an' it +as 'issolve'

Second /ealing -ro* %aster Be-ore /e Kno's %e

!n the su))er of 1929, +e ha' to )ove to a less e6ensive house "fter +e +ere settle', ! ha' anotherse)i=suerconscious 'rea) of .aster #he 'octor ha' thought that robably )y lungs +ere infecte'but in this 'rea), .aster instea' of hearing )y chest, sai', 4#here is nothing +rong +ith your lungs, itis your nerve center +here the trouble is4 -aying this, he cue' his fingers an' lace' the ti of hisfingers over )y naval saying, 4! +ill heal you +here the trouble is4 "s he 'i', so ! again felt thatelectric +ave going through )y +hole bo'y .aster loo&e' at )e an' sai', 4What is the )atter +ith

your eyesO4 "t the sa)e ti)e, he o&e' his first t+o fingers right into )y eyes, that sa)e electric +avegoing through the) also ! 'i' not &no+ ! ha' any hysical trouble +ith )y eyes !t serve' t+ouroses, for to this 'ay, ! 'o not +ear glasses an' it a+a&ene' )y siritual eye

! began to feel that ! +as living in a strange house ! +as +al&ing as if in a 'rea), living in anat)oshere in +hich ! 'i' not belong .y health began to fall again, but the 'octor coul' not fin'anything +rong +ith )e We as&e' hi) if ! +ent to a +ar)er cli)ate if it +oul' hel )e an' he sai',4*es, ! thin& it +oul'4 We &ne+ so)e frien's +ho +ere shortly 'riving to 5lori'a !t +as a goo'oortunity for )e to go +ith the) to a +ar)er cli)ate ! loo&e' in the ast=West )aga>ine to see ifthey ha' a *ogo'a center in 5lori'a, but they 'i' not have at that ti)e ! +ante' to be +here ! coul'atten' )eetings, that is +hy ! 'eci'e' to co)e to Aos "ngeles instea' "fter that, everything )ove'

fast!n $ctober 1929, .aster ca)e to Detroit He gave a lecture in the au'itoriu) He +as trying to

gather enough of a grou to go to !n'ia +ith hi) "fter the lecture, he shoo& han's +ith the au'ience When ! shoo& han's +ith hi) ! tol' hi) that ! +as going to Aos "ngeles soon an' he sai', 4Whenyou go, you )ust co)e u to .t Washington to see us4 ! +as so hay that he invite' )e ! 'i' not&no+ at that ti)e that .aster +as returning to .t Washington to ta&e full charge of the Hea'?uartershi)self

22



Part To%$ 0irst ,isit at SR0 /ead5uarters

5or )y birth'ay resent, .r Darling gave )e the fare to Aos "ngeles $n %ove)ber ;, 1929, !starte' out for Aos "ngeles an' +hat turne' out for )e to be a ne+ life ! too& the (reyhoun' bus for

+e coul' not affor' )ore ! continuously ro'e for five 'ays an' five nights +ithout a sto When ! gotto Aos "ngeles ! got off the bus, chec&e' )y baggage at the 'eot an' as&e' +here ! coul' fin' the

*WC" #hey sent )e to the 5igueroa HotelN so)eone ha' )is'irecte' )e, so again ! in?uire' the'irections ! too& another streetcar an' foun' the *WC" near Westla&e Par& ! rente' a roo) an' !ha' to share the roo), but the girl never sho+e' u, to )y satisfaction ! too& the streetcar bac& to thebus 'eot, retrieve' )y bags an' too& a ta6i bac& to the *WC" 5or 'ays +hen ! +ent to be' at night,)y be' +oul' sha&e so ! coul' not slee .y nerves +ere so sha&en fro) the five nights an' 'ays onthat bus, that )y bo'y coul' not sto sha&ing

"fter )y arrival, the ne6t 'ay ! calle' .t Washington an' as&e' for Brah)achari %ero'e He

ca)e to the hone an' as&e', 7Why 'on7t you co)e u here tonight for services, -+a)ii is going togive the )e'itation after+ar's ! as&e' hi) ho+ to get there He 'irecte' )e, but his 'irections +ereso oor ! ust coul'n7t fin' it ! as&e' the con'uctor +here -an afael +as, he loo&e' at his )a an''irecte' )e to +al& several bloc&s until !7' fin' the street ! +ante' ! foun' it all right but it +as thebac& +ay ! starte' +al&ing u the hill ! ha' never +al&e' a hill before "fter several bloc&s, ! ca)e uto a young coule +ho +as +or&ing on a car ! stoe' to as& the) ho+ )uch further it +as to thehea'?uarters, he ans+ere', 7*ou7ve got three )iles of +in'ing roa'4 ! sighe', 4$h )y that is a long

+ay ! +ant to atten' the services at the center4 #hey +atche' )e start u the hill, then the boy calle'out, 4Just a )inute, let )e see if ! can borro+ )y father7s car an' if ! can +e !7ll 'rive you u4 Hisfather consente' an' ! +as save' that long +al&, for he an' his +ife &in'ly 'rove )e to the 'oor of.t Washington an' the beginning of a ne+ life When the 'evotee begins his on+ar' )arch to+ar's

(o', He +ill re)ove all obstacles on the 'evotee7s ath ! can sho+ you ste by ste ho+ the Aor'cleare' )y +ay 5irst, He re)ove' )y greatest attach)ent, )y )other, by relieving her of hersuffering bo'y -he ha' attache' )e to )y father by giving )e t+o houses +ith the un'erstan'ing that! ta&e care of )y father for the rest of his life (o' use' )y o+n father to relieve )e of that bon' !f)y father ha' not thro+n )e out of the house because of *ogo'a, because of )y ro)ise to )y)other ! +oul' have staye' to ta&e care of hi) He live' to be 93 years ol' an' ! +oul' have been'enie' all those years +ith .aster an' (o'7s +or& .an rooses but (o' 'isoses #hen the Aor')a'e )y bo'y ill to bring )e to .t Washington for a +ar)er cli)ateN hence, steing out of sevenyears of )arrie' life into a life 'e'icate' to (o'7s an' .aster7s service only

.r Darling +illingly gave )e u ! signe' a #rust Dee' giving .r Darling the la&e roerty +eha' ointly, leaving )e free fro) ersonal attach)ent as +ell as earthly ossessions that ! )ay be freeto give )y full attention to the ursuit of )y goal, (o' .y a'ote' son/nehe+ +as re)ove', an')y brother an' fa)ily re)ove' the)selves by his an' her o+n evil actions -ee ho+ the Aor' ta&escare of His o+n, if +e but oen our hearts, )in's, an' souls for the 'elivery

When ! entere' .t Washington for the first ti)e, an el'erly la'y, .rs -chra)), greete' )e atthe 'oor, she +as very &in' an' le' )e to the chael %ero'e +as tal&ing "fter fifteen to t+enty)inutes, .aster +al&e' in ! ha' ta&en a seat in the front ro+ "s ! loo&e' at hi) an' listene' to his

+or's of +is'o), again that statue=li&e feeling of co)lete stillness ca)e over )e ! 'i' not )ove therest of the )eeting

%aster 6i)es a 4inner in /onor o- %$ /o*eco*ing

" fe+ 'ays later ! +al&e' u the hill to .t Washington ! 'i' not see anyone in the lobby so ! +al&e'to the &itchen ! sa+ .aster an' achi', his secretary, stan'ing by the stove "s ! stee' into the

23



'oor+ay .aster greete' )e saying, 4Well, +ell, +here have you beenO4 ! ans+ere', 4"t the *WC"4 !a'vance' to ta&e .aster7s han' ! coul' feel the sa)e electric +ave co)e into )y ar) an' through )ybo'y an' out of )y toes .aster tol' )e later at that instant he recogni>e' )y face as one of the )anyhe ha' seen in a vision before lan'ing on the ")erican shores for the first ti)e in 192@ .aster as&e')e to stay for 'inner that night Aater the others gathere' to hel .aster coo& ! hele' in the &itchen

+ashing ans an' ots, etc ! su''enly beca)e very ill ! trie' to sha&e it off, but it ersiste' an' ! leftthe &itchen ! )et %ero'e in the hall+ay an' ! tol' hi) ! +as leaving He as&e' 4WhyO4 ! tol' hi) ! +as not feeling +ell an' ! 'i' not +ant to stay if ! coul' not be useful He suggeste' that ! go to one ofthe girl7s roo)s to rest a +hile until 'inner ! +as really afrai' the +ay ! felt that ! +oul' beco)e ?uiteill an' ! 'i' not +ant to be a bur'en to any one esecially here ! ans+ere' that ! ha' better go to )yroo) an' ! +oul' co)e so)e other 'ay .aster tol' )e later, 4! +as very 'isaointe' +hen ! hear'that you ha' left, ! thought, 7What is this Aor', is she going to turn a+ay so soon after returning ho)e,7but after ! learne' fro) %ero'e that you ha' left because you +ere ill ! felt better, for ! +as giving this'inner in honor of your ho)eco)ing after incarnations of absence4 $f course, ha' ! &no+n that he

+as 'oing this for )e, ! +oul' have re)aine' even if it ha' cost )y life #hat is one ti)e ignorance +as not bliss

! re)aine' a fe+ 'ays in be', then ! foun' out that ! coul' rent a roo) at the Bethel Ao'ge at thefoot of the hill ! +oul' be closer to the hea'?uarters !t is no+ calle' the .ar)ion Way Hotel

%$ 0irst Roo* at te /ead5uarters

"fter a +ee&s stay at the *WC" ! )ove' to )y ne+ roo) ! felt better an' nearer to ho)e, ! +al&e'u .t= Washington Drive every 'ay to co)e an' hel at the center #he )o)ent ! starte' u the hill !

+oul' feel better an' ! coul' hear the $. ! live' in this rente' roo) for al)ost a )onth before ! gotu enough nerve to as& .aster if ! coul' co)e an' stay here ! thought ! )ight as +ell ay )y renthere as to give it in a strange lace

.aster calle' )e u to his library an' as&e' )e to sit 'o+n ! can still see hi) acing the floor

+hile telling )e he +ante' only har)onious eole ! as&e' hi) ho+ )uch ! +oul' ay, he ans+ere',4*ou can ta&e care of that later on +ith the office4 He 'i' not +ant to 'iscuss )oney )atters #hene6t 'ay Dece)ber 1, 1929, ! )ove' to )y natural ho)e, our blesse' hea'?uarters Dic&inson ca)eto hel 'rive )y bags an' )e an' he tol' )e to go to the secon' floor "s ! got u to the secon'floor, .aster an' #ony +ere ulling a ne+ rug into the first roo) to the left of the front stair+ay.aster s)ile' an' sai', 7#his +ill be your roo), ! a) utting a ne+ rug in for you4 Blesse' .aster, tothin& that he +oul' hu)ble hi)self in heling to carry a rug for one of his long lost chelas +ho ha'finally co)e ho)e to serve her (urui " +oo'en be' an' a )attress +ere also lace' in the roo) !latter +ent to a secon' han' store to buy a 'resser an' table an' chair "cross the hall fro) )e,Consuela an' her "unt Cava>os share' a roo) #hey only ha' t+o orange crates on each en' of theirbe' to hol' several lan&s to hol' their )attress u, an' )ore crates for 'resser an' shelves -o)e of

the roo)s +ere furnishe' +ith the in'ivi'ual7s o+n furniture an' so)e +ere e)ty #here +ere only afe+ eole here at that ti)e, about fifteen or si6teen

Sleeping Outside Te Appearance o- a Spaniard to %aster

When ! first ca)e, ! thought because ! +as in sunny California that ! coul' slee outsi'e, an' ! trie' itfor several +ee&s on the secon' floor oen orch, but the fog +as so thic& that )y covers an' hea'

+oul' be +et by )orning, an' )y bo'y coul' not ta&e it .aster a'vise' )e not to slee outsi'e ornear an oen +in'o+ .aster too slet on the thir' floor7s oen orch, an' ! )isse' hearing hisfootstes above +hen ! no longer slet outsi'e !t +as 'uring this erio' that .aster tol' us that +hilehe +as outsi'e in be' one night, so)eone aeare' to hi) on the e'ge of the orch He ha' to loo&

t+ice to be sure of +hat he sa+ !t +as a foot=high, erfectly shae' -aniar' 'resse' in +arrior7s garb,s+or' an' all, lea'ing for .aster7s hel to release hi) .aster sai' he ha' to tell hi) that he coul'not 'o so ust yet, but he +oul' 'o so +hen it +as the right ti)e

24



%aster 6i)es %e %$ Spiritual Na*e

#hat first #hurs'ay night )eeting that ! ha' )ove' u to .t Washington, .aster gave the)e'itation, an' after the )eeting he ha' the househol' )e)bers gather aroun' the firelace .astersat on the floor, his bac& resting on the illar in front of the firelace an' +e all sat in a circle aroun'

hi) on the floor He tal&e' infor)ally to us an' tol' stories "s it got late, he as&e' everyone to retire,but as&e' )e to re)ain ! silently sat by his si'e He loo&e' at )e an' sai', 4.a Durga4 "nune6lainable thrill asse' through )y being When ! as&e' hi) +hat it )eant he only ans+ere' thathe +oul' tell )e so)eti)e #hat e6lanation 'i' not co)e for )any years He sai' that 4Durga4 +asthe na)e he ha' given )e in )y revious incarnation +hen ! +as +ith hi) in his her)itage in !n'iaHe also tol' )e ! coo&e' for hi) an' that ! +as a -ister #o .aster it +as only a continuation of therevious life

I Beco*e %aster1s Cook and /ousekeeper

He starte' )e right in heling hi) coo& in his o+n &itchen, +hich really +asn7t a &itchen but ust a

)a&eshift He use' one of his aart)ent roo)s as a storage an' &itchen !t ha' a rug on the floor an'a s)all lavatory !t +asn7t )a'e to carry a lot of grease 5or everything that .aster ut in his curriesha' to be frie' first an' the grease +oul' al+ays sto u the sin& He only ha' a gasoline stove thatconstantly +ent out an' ha' to be u)e', an' create' s)o&e He ha' several +oo'en bo6es, one +euse' to eat onN the other to reare the vegetables, an' the other for the stove

:arla -chra)) use' to co)e on her 'ay off fro) teaching rivate stu'ents iano, to sen' the'ay at .t Washington, an' the three of us, .aster, she, an' )yself, coo&e' an' ate together "s shegot e6tra )oney, she ut shelves in his &itchen an' linoleu) on the floor " ne+ sin& an' gas stove

+ere given by 'ifferent stu'ents, an' a roun' table an' chairs, until his store roo) beca)e a &itchenthat .aster an' his close 'isciles coo&e' an' ate in for the re)ain'er of his life an' is still use' by usHe also gave )e the ob of hostess on -un'ays an' #hurs'ay nights to receive the au'ience at the 'oor

an' after servicesN an' +or& at the boo& table When he tol' )e +hat he +ante' )e to 'o, he sai',4e)e)ber that receiving guests is a very sacre' ob, for you never &no+ +hen (o' +ill co)e to the'oor4 ! cleane' his aart)ent, )en'e' an' +ashe' his clothes, 'i' his general house&eeing, ac&e'an' unac&e' +henever he ca)e an' +ent on his ca)aigns ! ?uote a fe+ e6certs of .aster7s lettersto )e regar'ing )y service to hi)<

J% 11, 1930 E What +or's shall ! say 'ear Durga for all you have 'one for the +or& an')eN your han' is in everything ! fin' everything in or'er

JA* 13, 1930 E *ou +oul' laugh to 'eath if you coul' see +hat in'escribable 'isor'er !have to ut u +ith *our )etho' an' co)lete obe'ience an' or'er an' 'oing things fro)

rea'ing )y )in' certainly soile' )e

J"%"* 0, 193 E $f course, +ho coul' coo& for )e better than you, ho+ ! )iss yourservices, but of course, you can7t give u the hel) you have un'erta&en

#hese e6certs +ere +ritten +hile .aster +as on his uroean an' !n'ian tri in 1930 an' 193 !'i' the ac&ing for the tri an' he +as so hay that he foun' everything in or'er ! a) a erson +hohas to have or'er an' syste) to +or& right

When .aster +as absent fro) .t Washington, ! hele' Consuela an' her aunt in the &itchen an'also in the office shiing boo&s an' ans+ering the hone We only ha' one hone an' ! ha' to run

all over the lace to call so)eone to the hone!n 193K, .aster stoe' ca)aigning in 'istant cities but re)aine' at the hea'?uarters an' gave

25



ca)aigns in the vicinity

%$ +ersonal .periences 'it %aster at Crist*as

5irst let )e say that there +ere )any others besi'es )yself +ho +ere involve' +ith our Christ)asactivities in the )any years that ! +as +ith .aster, but each in'ivi'ual can best tell their o+n story !

can only +rite the art ! laye' in our .t Washington Christ)as 'ra)a

! re)e)ber the 1929 Christ)as as if it +ere yester'ay, for it +as )y very first at .t Washington.aster ha' as&e' )e to hel hi) an' :arla -chra)) +ra so)e of his gifts to the house )e)bers,frien's, an' guests When it ca)e to+ar's )orning he sai' goo' night to )e an' lace' in )y han',not a string of ru'ra&sha bea's, but only a single bea' ! still have that bea' strung on other :riyabea's .aster brought for )e fro) !n'ia in 193 $n the Christ)as car', he sent to all *ogo'a)e)bers an' frien's, an' to )e, he +rote a ro)ise of a Whisers 5ro) ternity that +as soon to beoff the ress for the first ti)e

$ne of the )e)bers ca)e to tri) the )ost beautiful tree ! ha' ever seen -he )oistene' oun'sof table salt an' heae' it on the e'ge of the branches until it +as fully covere' !t loo&e' ust li&e

sno+ .aster +as so rou' an' lease' +ith the tree #he tables +ere set in the lobby an' a goo' ti)e +as ha' by all

#he follo+ing Christ)as ! acco)anie' .aster on his last )inute Christ)as shoing tour When +e got ho)e early that evening, .aster an' +e all +ent to the 'o+nstairs &itchen to start theelaborate coo&ing rearations for the ne6t 'ay7s 'inner !t +as one or t+o a) +hen +e +ere able togo bac& ustairs #hen .aster an' ! starte' +raing his gifts He han'e' )e one to +ra, +hile he

+rote on the gift tags "fter finishing, an' erhas a fe+ hours of slee, +e all +ent bac& 'o+nstairs tofinish the 'inner for the house )e)bers an' )any invite' guests .aster love' festivities #he )oreeole +ere )illing about the )ore he enoye' it He +as li&e a chil' 'uring that 'ay, for Christ)as

+as al+ays a very gay an' oyous event for .aster He li&e' elaborate 'ecorations an' al+ays +ante' a

large tree in the lobby Aater he ha' a s)all tree in his living roo) ustairs, for .aster ha' us, his fe+i))e'iate 'isciles +ho 'aily serve' hi), co)e to his living roo) to celebrate his ersonal Christ)as +ith hi), at +hich ti)e he gave us our gifts an' ours to hi)

#o the ast !n'ian )in', e+elry is consi'ere' as a )eans of security an' is regar'e' as +e 'o aban& account #herefore, .aster7s gifts consiste' of so)e e+elry #o his )in', he +as giving ussecurity, the sa)e as a father +oul' leave an inheritance to his fa)ily, so)ething for us to rely on incase of our financial nee's #hey +ere not e6ensive e+els, for he coul' not affor' the), but heshoe' all year roun' loo&ing for bargains, an' he really got )any +on'erful things as he +oul' tellus later, 7! got it for a song4 .aster +as fon' of oals an' he gave to the others several oals, butnone to )e When ! as&e' hi) +hy, he sai', 4#hey are not goo' for you,4 but one Christ)as to )ysurrise he gave )e a nice oal ring He ans+ere' )y in?uiry by saying, 7!t is all right for you to +ear

one no+4 %ee'less to say ho+ hay ! +as ! still have it an' several others besi'es What a thrill it +as for )e to receive a Aahiri .ahasaya statue, nu)erous other gifts an'

e6eriences 'uring the ti)e ! +as +ith .aster, an' he +ith us on this earth lane .aster +oul'teasingly say, 4%o fair ee&ing,4 or )ischievously say 4-anta Claus is not bringing Du anything forChrist)as,4 then +e +oul' &no+ that he ha' alrea'y bought our gift .aster li&e' to give his ersonalgifts to us last an' al+ays &et the best one for the cli)a6 !n 193K, one 'ay +hile ! +as shoing +ith.aster, +e asse' a #hrifty Drugstore ! sa+ a te''y bear in the +in'o+ #his brought )e)ories of)y chil'hoo' an' ! tol' .aster, 4When ! +as a little girl )y brother ha' a te''y bear an' 'o you&no+ he +oul'n7t let )e lay +ith it an' !7ve al+ays +ante' a te''y bear because of that4 ! 'is)isse'the inci'ent fro) )y )in'

#hat Christ)as +e +ere all sitting on the floor of .aster7s library, he han'e' )e the first bo6, an' +hen ! oene' it an' sa+ its content ! let out a shout, 4" te''y bearF4 !t +asn7t enough that blesse'

26



.aster ha' gotten it for )e, ! lace' the te''y bear on his la for an a''e' blessing He hel' it at ar)slength on the ti of his &nee "fter a little +hile he han'e' it to -r (yana)ata saying, 4Here -ister,you hol' it a+hile4 ! still have that blesse' te''y bear .aster +ante' to fulfill a chil'hoo' 'esire thatre)aine' unfulfille' all those years #hereafter, he too& great oy in giving toys to all of his chil'renan' esecially to aasi, his little boy

.aster shoe' an' collecte' ite)s all year roun' an' store' the) in his vault bo6 in his library When Christ)as ca)e aroun', he 'ug into his treasure chest to give a+ay to the in'ivi'uals !articularly re)e)ber one Christ)as after +raing gift after gift ! loo&e' u fro) )y floor seat tosee if he ha' another one for )e to +ra He su''enly stoe' in the 'oor+ay, an' ! sa+ by thee6ression on his face that he ha' forgotten )e He hurrie'ly returne' to his al)ost e)ty bo6, for bythis ti)e all his best ite)s ha' alrea'y been e6hauste' He foun' a long bar in of .oss agate Hesa'ly ca)e over to )e, han'e' )e the in to +ra for )yself, because he ha' forgotten an' the bestha' been given a+ay He starte' e6laining to )e ho+ valuable the in +as #he )ore he tal&e' the

+orse ! felt ! 'i' not +ant hi), a Christ, to feel that it +as necessary to evaluate a gift he +as giving tosuch an insignificant erson as ! %o )atter if he ha' to scrae the botto) of the barrel, the fact thathe felt ba' for forgetting )e +as far )ore valuable than a gift he coul' give )e ! value this in )ore

than another gift because of this senti)ent !t also ha' another )eaning as ! +as to learn the ne6t 'ay

"fter the 'inner an' all gifts +ere given to all, -alter, one of the house )e)bers at that ti)e, +entover to .aster tearfully saying, 4*ou forgot )e4 .aster calle' )e to their si'e an' sai' to her, 4Du

+rae' resents all night for )e to give to all,4 loo&ing at )e, he 'irecte' his ?uestion to )e saying,4an' Du, 'i'n7t ! forget you tooO4 ! ans+ere', 4*es, sir4 -alter sai', 4Well ! 'on7t feel so ba' since heforgot you too4 -o)eti)es another )ust ay a rice that others )ay be satisfie'

! esecially re)e)ber the 19K; Christ)as, first because on that )e'itation 'ay, .aster +as inecstasy an' he )a'e several re'ictions about )any ersons that +ere in the chael -u''enly ! hear')y na)e )entione' an' .aster +as saying, 4Du, Divine .other has greatly blesse' you to'ay, your

+or& is 'one4 8! e6lain this inci'ent later in )y autobiograhy

.aster ha' bought )e a gift !n the )eanti)e, ! ha' 'one so)ething that 'islease' hi), he tol')e later, 4! +asn7t going to give it to you, but Divine .other sai' to )e, 7*es, give it to her, she +illchange47 When he gave it to )e, he sai', 4#his gift is a sy)bol an' has a very 'ee significance4 !ca)e to learn its )eaning the last ti)e .aster ca)e to the her)itage before his .ahasa)a'hi #his isalso e6laine' later in )y autobiograhy #he gift +as, an' still is, for ! still have it on )y cloc& in full

vie+ +here ! can see it all the ti)e, a s)all gol' chariot, ulle' by one horse, +ith an angel in thechariot in front as the 'river, an' another angel in bac& " s)all +atch in the center for)s the bo'y ofthe chariot !t is a sy)bol of one of )y ast incarnations an' association +ith )y Belove' (uru thenas no+

#he last Christ)as )e'itation that .aster +as still +ith us ! +as ill all 'ay, but +as able to co)e

to .t Washington for Christ)as When ! arrive' .aster +as so lease' he sai', 4! &ne+ Divine.other +oul' )a&e you +ell to be here this Christ)as4 !t rove' to be our last Christ)as +ith ourBelove' .aster #hat year he gave Daya an' .il're' Ae+is a 'ia)on' cross ring ! +as a')iring theirrings, .aster loo&e' at )e as if he ha' gotten the +rong gift for )e, an' +hen he gave )e )y'ia)on' cross as&e' )e, 4Woul' you rather have a ring li&e the othersO4 ! sai', 4$h no -ir, ! love thisfar )ore,4 an' ! )a'e such a 'elightful fuss over )y gift that he +as lease' He s)ile' saying, 4*ou'on7t +ear e+elry or rings an' ! thought you +oul' li&e to +ear this cross +hen you have your)e'itation grous

We use' to have our Christ)as +ith .aster after the 'o+nstairs 'inner an' .aster7s intervie+s,etc !t +as so late that he later change' it to having it Christ)as )orning, before going 'o+n to finishcoo&ing, etc Ho+ever, it )a'e us hurry through it because 'inner +as set for a certain ti)e, an' a fe+of us ha' to go 'o+n to coo& or finish 'ecorating

27



We 'isciles also e6change' gifts +ith our .aster He +oul' reoice to see +hat ractical an'useful gifts +e gave each other, an' be hay +ith the love +e share' an' e6resse' to each other

#his he tol' us )a'e hi) the haiest We later 'iscontinue' this e6change a)ongst ourselves +ith.aster because it too& too )uch ti)e, besi'es there +ere girly gifts +e gave each other that +e 'i' not

+ant to e)barrass .aster an' ourselves +ith, so +hile .aster +as still intervie+ing 'o+nstairs +e ha'

our Christ)as together !t +as, ho+ever, after the 'inner an' +hen +e all coul' be together at oneti)e #he house )e)bers7 e6changes of gifts +ere 'elivere' to each one7s 'oor Christ)as ve !t +asan' still is a oyous feeling to hear the atter of feet going u an' 'o+n the halls leaving brightly

+rae' gifts at each 'oor (ifts for .aster fro) all +ere lace' un'er the lobby tree "fter 'inneran' a )e'itation, .aster +oul' ut his orange sha+l over his shoul'ers an' lay -anta Claus, an' givehis gifts to each one, an' oene' his o+n gifts fro) frien's an' )e)bers !t too& hours to +a'ethrough all that $ne of us +oul' han' hi) one gift an' tell hi) +ho) it +as for, he in turn calle'their na)es !f they 'i' not oen their gifts fast enough .aster +oul' ri the ribbon or aer to helthe) an' +as )a'e hay +hen the receiver sho+e' oy over his gift to the) !f there +ere )oreguests than gifts, .aster +oul' +hiser his instructions to get so an' so fro) here or there, +ra it,an' bring it 'o+n for so an' so %o one +ent e)ty=han'e' !n the last years of .aster7s life, his gifts

fro) frien's an' )e)bers +ere too nu)erous to oen 'o+nstairs #hey +ere lace' un'er hisersonal tree an' he +oul' oen the) at his leisure, an' enoye' it )uch )ore for he ha' ti)e toreally see an' areciate the) before they +ere ut a+ay

#hough it +as a''e' har'shi to the close 'isciles 'uring those shoing, +raing, an' coo&ing'ays, still, .aster7s enthusias) an' oyous sirit +ere contagious an' all oine' to hel carry it toco)letion His oy srea' throughout the house Christ)as +ith .aster +as a )e)orable one .t

Washington ha' a reutation of having the )ost oyous an' hay Christ)as at)oshere, foreveryone felt the real Christ -irit, for +e also ha' a living Christ in our )i'st

"fter the 193 Christ)as, .aster as&e' )e to live at ncinitas +ith -r (yana)ata #herefore, )yChrist)as 'uties +ith .aster +ere turne' over to .atai an' others But ! still ha' Christ)as 'uties to

erfor) for aasi He 'i' not &no+ +hat .aster7s nee's +ereN therefore, he +oul' give )e fun's an'instruct )e to buy anything .aster nee'e' as a Christ)as gift fro) hi) Ho+ hay .aster +as +ithaasi7s gift of the big gol' chair that he ha' his ecstasy in, +hich is still in .aster7s living roo) at .t

Washington

J"%"* 12, 19K2 E Dear Durga< ! a) enoying the Aittle $ne7s gift an' have been blessingyou for your instru)entality in choosing the color, +hich ! li&e

EP*

"n' the contour chair .aster use' at 29 Pal)s to 'ictate the (ita, etc

!t +as 'ifficult to fin' so)ething to give to aasi, +ho ha' everything ven his office associates

use' to as& )e +hat they coul' get hi) for Christ)as an' birth'ays !t +as the sa)e +ith .aster,everyone co)ing to us to fin' out +hat they coul' give .aster or aasi for Christ)as or birth'ays

Having Christ)as at the hea'?uarters +as a tra'ition .aster 'i' not, nor +oul' not, haveChrist)as any+here else #he sa)e alie' to the Christ)as all='ay )e'itation He starte' it onDece)ber 2K, 1932 !t +as such a beautiful, siritual event, that .aster )a'e it a tra'ition !n lateryears, so)eone suggeste' that it +oul' )a&e it easier to 'ecorate, finish +raing an' reare 'inner,etc, if the )e'itation +as on the 23r' "fter )uch ersuasion, he con'escen'e' to have it on the 23r'once #hat 'ay Jesus aeare' to .aster )uch )ore often than at any other revious ti)es an' thee6erience +as so great that .aster 'efinitely felt that the 23r' +as )ore leasing to Jesus than the2Kth #herefore, the 23r' +as 'efinitely establishe' .aster set the attern that is follo+e' to this 'ay

When he raye', the )agnetis) of his +or's enetrate' our )in's, an' +hen he laye' on thehar)oniu) an' chante', he ulle' our hearts along +ith hi) to 'eeer 'eths ! laye' the big 'ru)

28



an' Daya the sy)bols He +oul' signal +hen he +ante' us to lay, an' +hen he +ante' us to laylou'er an' faster #his beca)e a tra'ition, as +ell as )y singing .aster7s 4Divine Aove -orro+s4 song

#hose )e'itation 'ays +ith .aster +ere not only 'eely i)rinte' in our conscious )in's, butalso in the archives of the subconscious, an' still 'eeer into the suerconscious )in' to era'icatenu)erous ast, resent, an', ! hoe, future sychological &nots

We ha' to be ?uite un+ell not to go to the )e'itation ! re)e)ber 'uring )e'itation 'ay, !contracte' a severe col' ! +as ositively )iserable all through the first art of the )e'itation erio'

When the inter)ission ca)e, ! +rote .aster a note stating )y light, an' as&ing hi) +hat ! shoul' 'o,hoing he +oul' tell )e to re)ain in )y roo) an' go to be' When his ans+er ca)e, it rea', 4Do

+hatever you thin& best4 ! never 'i' anything +ithout his consent, therefore, ! +ent bac& 'o+n tofinish the rest of the )e'itation erio' When he sa+ )e co)e in, he s)ile' #he col' )isery 'i' notbother )e at all for the re)ain'er of the ti)e, though ! coul' not oin the 'o+nstairs celebration, still,! ut on a )as& an' oine' his an' our rivate Christ)as un'er .aster7s tree

Whenever .aster +oul' )ention that he sa+ Jesus, the hair on )y bo'y +oul' stan' on en' an'the vibrations +ere tre)en'ous $nce, +hile +e +ere singing (lory, Halleluah,4 ! felt Jesus )a&ing a

'ee i)rint of a cross on )y forehea' very ti)e +e sang that song, thereafter, the sa)e feeling of across on )y forehea' returns "nother ti)e, ! 'efinitely felt Jesus7 o)niresence in )y )in', heart,an' soul ! +as +on'ering if )y feelings +ere real When .aster so&e again, he sai', 7-o)e see Jesusan' ! &no+ others are feeling his o)niresence4 ! +as satisfie' to have )y ercetion verifie'

#he e6eriences 'uring our all='ay Christ)as )e'itations +ith .aster, are too nu)erous an' too'ee to )ention or e6ress

#he first of the t+o occasions ! ha' to )iss Christ)as at .t Washington +as after .aster7s.ahasa)a'hi ! ha' to stay +ith aasi at ncinitas, for the last of his 6=ray treat)ents fell on the 2Kthof Dece)ber !t also haene' that they ha' the all='ay )e'itation on that 'ate !t +as an e6tre)elysa' 'ay, for it +as )y first Christ)as +ithout our Belove' .aster in the flesh, an' also absent fro)

.t Washington .rs Ae+is &in'ly ut a very nice 'ecorate' tree in aasis roo), +hich ! coul' seean' enoy -he ha' lace' a in& rose on )y 'resser ! +as so very sa' that 'ay an', seeing the roseinstea' of Christ)as 'ecorations, ! felt a+fully sorry for )yself an' )entally co)laine' to .aster,saying, 4%o 'ecorations for )e, the rose is not even a re' one4 #he thoughts ha' not been fullye6resse' +hen ! hear' .aster7s voiceless voice say, 4%ever )in' Du, ! +ill give you a Christ)as tree4"fter a fe+ hours, aasi +ante' so)e uices an' ! sat on the en' chair While +e +ere seate' there, !hear' .aster7s voice fro) the living roo) hall co)ing fro) a recor' #his +as too )uch for )e tobearN ! ut )y hea' on )y ar)s resting on the table an' gave vent to soul=searing sobs -u''enly, inthe siritual eye aeare' a vision of lights in the for) of a beautiful sy))etrical tree -o ?uic&ly ha'.aster fulfille' his 'ivine ro)ise of giving )e a tree of )y o+n, one that has an' +ill re)ain +ith )ethe rest of )y life %ot only 'i' it satisfy )y vision, but it also ?uenche' the tears fro) )y heart an'

soul, as ! felt the vibrations of his Divine Presence too What blessings he besto+e' on this e)tyshell, hollo+ +ithout his resence, but fille' to overflo+ing +hen he 'ee)s to fill it +ith the (race ofhis Divine Aove

-ince the 'earture of our Belove' .aster fro) this earthly abo'e, he )a&es hi)self feltthroughout the holi'ays an' is very 'efinitely resent a)ongst us ! &no+ +ithout the sha'o+ of a'oubt that he co)es to the ure in heart an' )in', an' fills the soul +ith his o)niresent love

%$ 0irst Ne' 7ear at %t# "asington

.y first %e+ *ear at .t Washington, January 1, 193@, .aster too& -chra)) an' )yself an' a 'river,Dic&inson 8.aster nic&na)e' hi) 4Aongfello+4 because he +as so tall an' huge We +ent to Aaurel

Canyon an' icnic&e' by a little broo&, though there +as little +ater -chra)) too& ictures of .astersitting an' chanting #he icture is in the her)itage be'roo) niches at this ti)e

29



.aster also nic&na)e' )e 4(ultuton,4 because if so)ething 'i' not go as it shoul', or, ! 'i' notli&e +hat ! +as 'oing, ! use' to )u)ble rotest

! +as here a short ti)e +hen .aster tol' )e to bring #e', the nehe+ ! a'ote', here, that heshoul' loo& after hi) for )y sa&e But this boy +as not suite' to live in a siritual ho)e He ha'inherite' so)e of his natural father7s ba' habits an' he ha' to be sent a+ay .r Darling too& hi) in

+ith hi) an' his )other at Huntington Beach for a+hile, but, again, the boy +ent fro) ba' to +orse5inally, .r Darling ha' to sen' hi) to his )other an' sister He 'i' not 'o +ell there either, so theboy +as sent bac& to his natural father in Cana'a During the +ar he +ent into the ar)y an' )arrie'an nglish girl He no+ lives in nglan' +ith a very nice fa)ily ! a) tol' he is 'oing very +ell an')a&es a goo' husban' an' father

%$ Broter 4u-our Lea)es %t# "asington

-hortly after #e' arrive', rnest an' his +ife an' son ca)e to live here too -he +as the boo&&eeeran' 'i' general office +or& .y brother +as )a'e the )anager later of .t Washington, an' +or&e'aroun' the house in general )aintenance #hey live' here for t+o years #he Dufours an' ! +ere very

close, because +e all too& the Aessons together an' live' as one for a long ti)e an', no+ +e +ereserving the sa)e cause #hey sho+e' great enthusias) an' +or&e' 'ay an' night to live u to .aster7si'eals in every +ay .aster even ha' hi) slee in his living roo) on the 'avenort Aater, ! as&e'.aster if he &ne+ that Dufour +oul' not last, +hy 'i' he give hi) so )uch attention He ans+ere',4Because he +as +ith )e in a revious life !f you +ill recall, +hen Willia) the Con?ueror fell uonlan'ing in nglan', one of his )en tol' Willia), 7#his fall is a ba' o)en, let us turn bac&47 #his )an

+as )y brother in this life, an' .aster +as trying to hel hi), an' fin' out 'uring his slee +hat +asin Dufour7s subconscious )in' an' heart vi'ently, Dufour7s )in' +as not entirely ure an' ha'ersonal a)bitions, for +hen -atans test ca)e he fell har'

Aater, )y brother, +ithout &no+ing that caster beans +ere oisonous, ate t+elve of the) an'beca)e very ill His life +as sare' by .aster7s grace, but 'uring his +ea&ene' con'ition, )y brother

listene' to -ra''ha Devi, +ho +as out for self=glory #hey use' to get together an' tal& against theteachings an' .aster $ne 'ay, )y brother ha' a visitor, a )e)ber +ho Dufour ha' encourage' tota&e the Aessons #his )an ca)e to see )y brother to hear )ore encouraging 'iscussions of theteachings, but instea' )y brother tal&e' against the Aessons an' .aster ! only hear' a fe+ +or's as !

+ent by his roo) ! +aite' until the )an left an' ! starte' in to give )y brother a iece of )y )in' fortal&ing against the +or& an' .aster ! only ha' a chance to say a fe+ +or's +hen )y brother stee'into the 'oor+ay, too& )e by the nec&, an' thre+ )e against the +all across the hall ! +as blac& an'blue fro) his tight gri #his +as in .ay 1932N .aster +as in -anta .onica at a rente' beach house !as&e' #ony Diegel to 'rive )e to .aster ! ha' to +ait on the beach until .aster returne' at oneo7cloc&, for he ha' gone out that evening ! tol' hi) )y story When .aster an' ! returne' to .t

Washington, .aster calle' )y brother for an intervie+ .y brother +as so far gone in evil thin&ing,

that he barge' to+ar's .aster to stri&e hi), but the Aor' rotecte' .aster by thro+ing a lightningfla)e on Dufour He i))e'iately felt the i)act #he burning sensation +as so forceful that Dufourran out of the roo), 'o+n the stes, an' rolle' on the cool la+n, hoing to relieve the burningsensation ! 'on7t thin& it laste' for too long, but long enough to give Dufour a goo' lesson .y sister=in=la+ ha' to fin' a roo) at a neighbor7s house, +hich they ha' beco)e frien'ly +ith in their searchfor frien's in their evil thin&ing against the +or& an' .aster Dufour then 'e)an'e' five hun're''ollars fro) .aster, as Dufour sai' he 'i' not have a cent to fin' +or&, or rent a house, etc .aster'i' not have )uch )oney, but he gave Dufour the )oney for )y sa&e When it ca)e ti)e to receivethe )oney, Dufour +oul' not co)e into the house to get it, but he tol' .aster to co)e out in the)i''le of the tennis court ! +as follo+ing .aster 'o+n to the )eeting lace +hen )y brother sa+)e Ai&e a )a' )an, he shoute', 4#ell her to stay out of this ! 'on7t +ant her aroun' here #ell her to

get out4 .aster signale' )e to stay on the si'e+al& ! as&e' .aster +hy Dufour 'i' not +ant )ethere He ans+ere', 7Because the 'evil 'oes not li&e the resence of an angel4 But, ! thought, because

30



of )oney Dufour +as +illing to face a Christ in .aster ! 'i' not have anything to offer hi),therefore, he 'i' not +ant )e aroun' #hey staye' for a+hile in Aos "ngeles, but later +ent bac& toDetroit #hey are no+ living in !n'iana, still very bitter in sirit an' hanging on to his false ri'e !?uote an e6cert of a letter .aster +rote )e on .ay 2@, 1933, +hile .aster +as in Detroit

."* 2@, 1933 E Dear Durga ! ha' an interesting reunion +ith DufourN he ca)e to the hotel! calle' hi) to co)e, the ol' feu' is gone, ! tol' hi) you +oul' +rite to hi), lease 'o +ritehi) after ! see you His a''ress is Bo6 13 tica, .ichigan

E P*

!n 193;, .aster sent )e on )y first vacation alone He +ante' )e to have the best of clothes an'stay at the best hotel, the Boo& Ca'illac in Detroit, to sho+ to the Dufours that )y choice of life +asfar better than the one he ha' chosen for hi)self an' his fa)ily Before )y brother left Aos "ngeles,he offere' to have )e co)e an' )a&e )y ho)e +ith the), but )y ans+er +as that this +as )y ho)ean' this is +here ! shall re)ain the rest of )y life

%r# 4arling Co*es to Cali-orniaAater, .r Darling ca)e to California, but he 'i' not stay at .t Washington, but live' +ith his )otheran' brother in Huntington Beach .aster tol' )e later that .r Darling ha' tol' hi), 7! &ne+ that she8)yself coul' not stay in a +orl'ly life, an' if you +ill heal her bo'y, ! +ill +illingly give her u to'e'icate her life to yours an' (o'7s service4

%$ 0irst +icnic at te Beac

When .aster ca)e bac& fro) his ca)aigns, he ha' to get a+ay fro) cro+'s He too& Dic&inson,-chra)), an' ! to the beach on icnics ! re)e)ber the first icnic on the beach ust belo+ #orreyPines He too& %ero'e, Dic&inson, -chra)), )yself, an' a fe+ others ! have ictures of this outing

"e Recei)ed No Salar$

During 193@ an' 1931, no one receive' a salary When .aster +as a+ay, for our recreation, a fe+ of us +oul' gather an' say, 4!7ve got enough )oney for an ice crea) cone,4 or another, 4!7ve got enough fora )alt4 We ha' )ore fun than if +e ha' sent a 'ollar on entertain)ent .aster7s great treat for us

+as s&i)o ies, ice crea) covere' +ith chocolate He love' the) !n or'er to treat his large fa)ily,he +oul' buy a +hole bo6 of the) an' ass the) aroun' to each one of us .aster7s greatest leasure

+as to buy things, or ti'bits to eat, an' +ith his sacre' han's ass it along to each With each bite ca)ea blessing

!n 1930, +e still receive' only one 'ollar a +ee& oc&et e6ense #his )a'e a very 'ee

i)ression on aasi +hen he hear' that +e bought our o+n clothes out of that a)ount an' all ourinci'entals besi'es $f course, )oney +ent )uch further at that ti)eN +e coul' get a 'ress an' otherite)s for a 'ollar #hen, too, +e got han'=)e='o+ns -chra)) use' to get so)e clothes fro) hersister an' frien's -he too& +hat she nee'e' an' then asse' the rest to )e Aater years, our salaryincrease' to five 'ollars a )onth, an' gra'ually it increase' until it is at its resent stan'ar', t+enty'ollars a )onth, the Directors, t+enty=five 'ollars a )onth

/ousecar Trips

.aster bought his first housecar in 193@ !t +as an ol' one, not the trailer=tye they have these 'ays,but the &in' +here the bo'y is locate' +ith the chassis an' the )otor an' all in one iece ! have )any

+on'erful )e)ories of this housecar, +hich ! +oul' li&e to share +ith you

.aster use' the housecar a great 'eal to get a+ay fro) telehone calls, intervie+s an' to +rite,travel, an' have icnics We coul' not al+ays affor' hotels, cabins, or restaurants Wherever +e +ent,

31



+e ha' our coo&ing e?ui)ent han'y We +oul' sto at a nice lace or un'er a tree, ull out all thecoo&ing utensils an' foo's an' coo& on an ol' gasoline stove, +hich +e ha' to u) every fe+)inutes in or'er to get any coo&ing 'one at allN an' the thing s)o&e', so it too& us ages to get theblac& off the botto) of the ans .aster thoroughly enoye' those outings an' so 'i' +e

.aster slet in the housecar, +hich ha' a be' Carson, or the other 'rivers, slet outsi'e besi'e

the car, :arla an' ! in our sleeing bags, +hich she ha' bought for )e, a goo' 'istance fro) thehousecar #he first ti)e ! slet outsi'e, ! re)e)ber ! +as so very col' Believe )e, later, ! learne' tobring enough +ar) clothes to slee in We al+ays 'rove until late at night When .aster +ante' tosto, +e 'i' so, any+here -o)eti)es it +as so 'ar& +e coul' not see +here +e ha' ar&e' an' thene6t )orning +e +oul' fin' +e +ere al)ost in so)eone7s bac&yar'

.aster love' to go to the beach $ne ti)e +e +ent to Dana Point, California, an' ar&e' on thecliff overloo&ing the sea We re)aine' there for several 'ays $ne afternoon the four of us E that is.aster, :arla -chra)), Carson an' )yself E +ere stan'ing in a ro+ loo&ing out at the sea While +e

+ere ga>ing out to sea, several rays of light slanting to+ar's the ocean aeare' in the s&y !t +as li&esunrays iercing through the clou's $ne of us )entione' it to .aster He reoicingly sai', 4! a) gla'

you are all seeing this )iracle fro) (o'4 !t +as this occasion that insire' .aster to +rite an'co)ose the chant, 4Co)e Aisten to .y -oul -ong4

"nother ti)e +e +ent to Pal) -rings We ar&e' the housecar at the Pal) Canyon an' ca)e'there for several 'ays $ne 'ay .aster an' +e +ere +al&ing in the canyon, he as&e' )e to sing 4DivineAove -orro+s4 -eeing the century=ol' trees an' roc&s, ! felt the 'ee )eaning of .aster7s +or's,4Centuries an' centuries ! calle' out for #hy na)e4

"nother ti)e in that sa)e canyon, .aster +ashe' his hair in the broo& an' sat on a large roc& to)e'itate, +hile the +ar) sun 'rie' his hair He +ent into a very 'ee ecstasy :arla +as sitting onanother roc& a short 'istance fro) .aster, an' ! +as a goo' 'istance a+ay on a huge roc& )e'itatingtoo He calle' us both to go bac& to the housecar "s ! oine' hi) an' +al&e' 'irectly behin' hi), !

+as caught in a tre)en'ous feeling of stillness !t +as as though all )otions of the bo'y an',articularly, the )in' ha' stoe' an' ! +as only conscious of that o)niresent stillness ! +asconscious of +al&ing an' careful to avoi' obstruction on the ath+ay "s +e aroache' the housecar,.aster turne' an' instructe' )e to ic& u so)e fire+oo' ! 'i' so +ithout losing that blissful feelingof stillness ! lai' the +oo' 'o+n an' follo+e' .aster into the housecar He stoe' on the ste, an'turning to face )e sai', 4-tillness is (o'4

#his occasion also insire' .aster to +rite an' co)ose another chant, 4Co)e $ut of the -ilent-&y4

arly in 1931, .aster left Aos "ngeles for his ca)aign in Denver He too& the train an'instructe' :arla, )y brother, an' )yself to 'rive the housecar an' oin hi) in Denver "fter theclasses, +e 'rove to Colora'o -rings for a vacation .aster ha' rente' a house, +hich +as a )inister7sresi'ence, +ho ha' gone on a )onth7s leave !t +as a neat, co)fortable house When +e left, :arlaan' ! cleane' the house thoroughly )a&ing sure +e left it as neat as +e ha' foun' it .aster left his4-cience of eligion4 boo& +ith his inscrition an' a than& you note for the )inister an' his +ife.aster hear' fro) the )inister later than&ing hi) for the boo& an' saying ho+ lease' they +ere tofin' the house in better or'er than they ha' left it

During this ti)e, so)e of the )e)bers hele' .aster buy a convertible four=seater 5or' Ho+.aster thrille' an' enoye' sitting on the very to, using the bac& seat as a foot stool, ta&ing the fullbenefit of Colora'o7s beautiful vie+ -everal )e)bers +ante' to co)e bac& to Aos "ngeles +ith.aster He +as in his glory to have a caravan follo+ hi), enoying the sights of Bryce, Sion, an' othersights on the +ay

Aate in 193@, .aster too& a large grou on an outing in the housecar "t the en' of an enoyableicnic, before leaving, it +as .aster7s habit to )e'itate +ith all #he uholstere' seats, +hen the bac&

32



+as lai' 'o+n, )a'e into a be' for .aster to occuy at night #his +as 'one on this occasion to )a&e)ore seating caacity .aster +as seate' in the center +ith his bac& against the +all -everal of us +eresitting on the e'ge of the be' on each si'e of hi) .aster +ent into a very 'ee ecstasy During the)e'itation he +as +ar) an' too& off his coat, an' lai' it ne6t to hi) .uch later, ttie Bletch, +hoha' ust arrive' at .t Washington, an' +as seate' ne6t to )e, not &no+ing that one 'oes not at any

ti)e use a guru7s clothing on oneself or on other ersons, sa+ that ! +as col', too& .aster7s coat an'thre+ it over )y shoul'ers #he )inute it hit )y bo'y, ! felt li&e an electric +ave enetrate' )y +holebeing When ! sa+ +hose coat she ha' use', ! unhesitatingly starte' to ta&e it off .aster stoe' )esaying, 4Don7t ta&e it off4 What countless blessings ! an' the others have receive' in the resence ofthis living Christ=li&e soul, an' this inci'ent sho+s us that vibrations 'o re)ain i)regnate' in theclothing an' the surroun'ings of one +ho is e)erge' in (o'

#his housecar +as later given to the %ero'es as a )eans of transortation an' ho)e for theirca)aign +or& bac& ast an' the .i'+estN they later sol' it

!n 193K, after .aster gave his housecar to the %ero'es, :arla hele' hi) buy a secon' housecar #his too +as the sa)e tye as the first, but, in a''ition, it ha' a sho+er, stove, toilet, etc !t +as +ell

built, but the chassis an' )otor +ere not too goo' !n .arch 1930, .aster bought a ne+ Do'gechassis He +as conte)lating ho+ the bo'y coul' be transferre' onto the ne+ chassis He loo&e' at)e an' sai', 4*ou 'o it4 #o )y consternation, ! ans+ere', 4But -ir, ! 'on7t &no+ the first thing aboutsuch things4 He ans+ere', 4*ou7ll &no+ ho+, ! +ill +or& +ith you Castillo +ill +or& +ith you4 !as&e' Castillo to fin' a garage that +oul' have a crane to lift the bo'y off the ol' chassis an' lace iton the ne+ He foun' a garage on "venue @ in Highlan' Par& that +as e?uie' for our urose !

+or&e' 'ay in an' 'ay out, si'e=by=si'e +ith Castillo, in grease, oil, an' 'irt fro) hea' to foot

When +e starte' to ta&e the bo'y off the chassis, +e foun' to our astonish)ent that the bo'y +asonly hel' by t+o bolts .y heart gave a lea thin&ing bac& on ho+ often this housecar ha' gone uan' 'o+n "venue K3, our stee hill, loa'e' +ith eole an' .aster What if these bolts ha' given +ayon the hillO ! ha' visions of the bo'y sliing off the chassis an' 'o+n the hill, +hile the )otor +as

going u+ar', but all re)aine' safe in the fortress of (o'7s rotection

"n' no+ +e +ere re)oving this ha>ar' by securing it +ith lenty of bolts We then foun' that thebo'y +as too long for the chassis 5ortunately, there +as an ol'=fashione' blac&s)ith ne6t 'oor !consulte' hi)N he )a'e strong e6tensions an' sol'ere' the) to the chassis

$ne 'ay Castillo ha' to go else+here #hat )orning he 'rove an' left )e at the garage, saying that.t Washington +as going to ic& )e u aroun' five ) "fter +or&ing all 'ay by )yself, ! +asgreasy, 'irty, an' there +as no la'ies rest roo) in the buil'ing to clean u in #his +as all right +henCastillo 'rove )e bac& ho)e at the en' of the 'ay, but this ti)e ! +as +aiting for a car fro) .t

Washington to ic& )e u :no+ing ho+ they al+ays 'elaye', ! +aite' a +hole hour before calling.aster He tol' )e a car +as on its +ay, +hich shoul' have ta&en only ten )inutes to reach )e !

+aite' another half=hourN still no car +as in sight #ire', 'irty, an' ve6e', ! again calle' .aster toco)lain that they ha' not yet co)e for )e, he ans+ere', 4! can7t hel it if the car ! sent 'i' not reachyou4 .y voice e6resse' )y 'isleasure, saying, 4What a) ! suose' to 'o, it7s al)ost ti)e for

#hurs'ay night7s )e'itation an' ! a) still here +aitingO4 His only ans+er +as, 4Well then, +al& ho)e4! as&e' the garage )an if he coul' ta&e )e to the foot of the hill, fro) there our car +ill ic& )e uHe sai' he coul'n7t because he +as alone 7n the garage an' coul' not leave it alone for so long ! )usthave loo&e' forlorn, an' no 'oubt, .aster +as sen'ing hi) the thought, after thin&ing it over fora+hile, he con'escen'e' to 'rive )e to the foot of the hill %ee'less to say, ho+ hay that )a'e )e,for ! +as not 'resse' to ta&e the streetcar or even +al& on the street 5ortunately, there +as only oneerson +aiting for our car to ta&e )e u the hill for the services ! &ne+ her +ell, therefore, )y face

+as save' ! learne' later that the car that .aster ha' sent ha' a flat tire +ithout a sare, an' +ith

other interrutions 'i' not get to leave the house at all, an' ! beat it u the hill #his +as a goo' lessonfor )e, as it sho+e' )e that +hen one is +or&ing for (o' or .aster, one shoul' not e6ect favors !n

33



the bac&groun' of )y )in', ! +as thin&ing, 4! +as +or&ing har' for hi), at a ob that shoul' havebeen 'one by a )an, an' ! at least a) entitle' to so)e service4 .aster7s ans+er ut )e right bac& in)y lace, henceforth, no )atter ho+ har' or +hat the +or& +as, ! learne' not to e6ect any secialfavors

"fter +e 'rove the housecar bac& ho)e, ! ainte' the insi'e an' outsi'e of the bo'y #hen

.aster +ante' ne+ sring cushions ! )a'e the) )yself as +ell as uholstere' the), ut in ne+curtains, an' it +as rea'y for )ore icnics an' tris .aster +as )a'e very hay +ith the results

aasi only +ent on a short tri aroun' ncinitas +ith .aster an' a fe+ of us in the housecar Westill have this housecar bo'y, +e hoe to 'e'icate it as a shrine !t is no+ locate' in the bac& of the-5 cafe at ncinitas (o' +illing it +ill be 'one so)e'ay2

A 0e' o- %aster1s +ropecies -or %e

!n 193@, .aster +as on one of his eastern ca)aigns $ne )orning ! receive' a letter fro) hi) +hichhe ha' +ritten several 'ays reviously, for it ca)e by train )ailN lus 'elivery 'ays ! give you thisinfor)ation only to convince you of .aster7s rohetic o+ers "t the en' of the letter, he +rote,

4#o'ay you +ill see )illions of little lights4 "s ! loo&e' u in the s&y, there +ere lights over )y hea'Ho+ 'i' he &no+ +hich 'ay ! +as going to receive the letter to be able to +rite 4#o'ay4O

"nother ti)e, in 193@, a grou of us +as sitting at the 'o+nstairs &itchen or 'ining roo) table-o)eone as&e' .aster +hat +as in store in life for the) ! 'on7t re)e)ber +hat he tol' each oneresent, but ! re)e)ber +hat he tol' )e +hen ! as&e' hi) if ! +oul' have to give lectures an' teachas he 'i' He ans+ere', 4%o, your ath is in'ivi'ual teachings an' through chanting,4 though )anyyears later, he tol' )e that ! +oul' )a&e a goo' lecturer

Ho+ +ell ! re)e)ber the first ban?uet .aster gave soon after ! )ove' to .t Washington Heinvente' the gluten, an' he +oul'n7t let anyone aroun' e6cet those he ha' taught ho+ to )a&e it

#hat -atur'ay night, he as&e' )e to re)ain in the 'ining roo) +ith hi) +hile #ony an' Dic&inson

+or&e' on the gluten .aster as&e' )e to sit at the table +ith hi) He too& a long brea' &nife an'as&e' )e to hol' an 1;4 string +ith both han's an', +ith a ?uic& thrust of the &nife, he cut the stringin t+o #hen he too& a otato an' ha' )e thro+ it u in the air an' he cut it in t+o ! thre+ u theotato until he ha' cut it all into s)all ieces During the ban?uet rearations, .aster +as al+ays so

very cheerful He +oul' su''enly burst into a Hin'u 'ance +ith his ar)s an' hea'N though it +as onlyfor a secon', it +as enough to give )e a thrill, for +ithout &no+ing it, it +as rea+a&ening ast)e)ories

When one calls (o' earnestly +ith 'ee feeling, (o' +ill )anifest hi)self in the blesse' for) ofthe (uru "nother ti)e ! +as rearing the vegetables for the ban?uet, ! +as stan'ing over the sin&,chanting 4Door of .y Heart4 ! ha' ust reeate' the +or's, 4Wilt #hou co)e, ust for once co)e to)e,4 ! felt .aster stan'ing by )y si'e, saying, 4! have co)e4 ! +as so ne+ here that only )y soulrecogni>e' the 'eth of his sacre' +or's

Ban5uets

.aster love' ban?uets an' +oul' have one every )onth "t first he gave )e charge of 'ecorating theban?uet hall, +hich is no+ the )ain office We ha' to ut 'ecorations on the ceiling, +alls, an' tables

#he tabletos +ere )a'e of heavy car'boar' an' lace' on sa+horses #hey +ere )a'e of such roughlu)ber that the la'ies +oul' catch their hose on the), but it +as the best +e coul' affor' at that ti)e

We 'i' not have tableclothsN +e use' +hite roll aer, li&e +raing aer in the stores, an' flo+ersfor a centeriece #hey loo&e' nice to us any+ay .aster coul' not 'o everything hi)self but oversa+everything He also ut )e in charge of the coo&ing ! +oul' 'ecorate in the afternoon an' coo& all

night before the ban?uet un'er .aster7s 'irections He, of course, ut the last )inute touches to the

2 This housear is still loated on S. grounds in Eninitas*

34



curries, +hich )a'e the) erfect .aster, in those 'ays, use' to 'ee=fry all the vegetables beforeutting the) in the curry We +oul' 'o the frying the night before an' after a fe+ hours slee, +e

+ent 'o+n to finish the coo&ing We )a'e chutney, atties, or so)ething ne+ .aster ha' 'iscovere'for the occasion .aster +as such a +on'erful coo&N everything ha' to be ust right to suit his taste He

+oul' +or& at it until he +as satisfie' +ith the results We ha' to use very tall coo&ing ans an' !,

being short of structure, ha' to stan' on a chair to 'o the stirring #o our )in's an' hearts, theban?uet +as a success only if our .aster +as lease'

%aster +la$s te Organs

.aster love' to lay the s)all foot u) organ +e ha' !n the evening, +e use' to gather aroun'

.aster at the organ an' chant to our hearts7 content When he bought the large ie organ, he use' tolay it late at night, longN an' the lou'er, the )ore he enoye' it #he neighbors use' to call us tosoften the )usicN it +as &eeing the neighbors fro) sleeing

Sankirtan %aster Introduces %e as a %usician

.aster use' to call us to his library for our )orning )e'itations an' san&irtanN +e all sat on the floor !re)e)ber ho+ the heavy 'ru) on )y fol'e' legs use' to cut the circulation Auc&ily, ! ha' the big'ru) to use as a ro +hen .aster +oul' say, 4Aet us stan',4 for at least one of )y legs +oul' hanglifeless for lac& of circulation !t +as har' to reali>e in )y li)ite' )in', ho+ )uch the soul e6an'e'in those +on'erful )e'itations +ith our Belove' (urui -ea&ing of chanting, one 'ay in 193@,.aster too& -chra)) an' )yself +ith Carson as the 'river in the housecar to Phoeni6 to visit a)e)ber +ho ha' a retreat in the 'esert .aster intro'uce' -chra)) to the hostess as a )usician an',also, intro'uce' )e as a )usician #he +o)an ha' a iano in the house an' )y first thought +as,4What if she shoul' as& )e to layO4 "s soon as ! ha' a chance, ! as&e' .aster, 4Why 'i' youintro'uce )e as a )usician, you &no+ ! 'on7t &no+ one note fro) another4 He ?uic&ly, but 'efinitely,ans+ere', 4#hat is the +ay ! +ante' you4 Aater, he e6laine' further, 7#hough -chra)) +as a )usic

rotTgTT since chil'hoo', she cannot lay one of )y chants, because she 'i' not have notes -he +oul' have laye' the) erfectly if there +ere notes, but it +oul' not co)e fro) her heart ! +antyou to chant fro) your heart, )in', an' +hat co)es natural to you fro) )e4

#he first notes to a fe+ of his chants +ere +ritten by .inie Christ)as .ayo7s son 'uring .aster7sabsence in !n'ia in 1930=193 #hough so)e chants in the resent chant boo& are not right, still it isso)ething, that is +hy .aster sai', after he ca)e bac& fro) !n'ia, 4Du has &et )y chants alive4

I +la$ te Big 4ru* -or te 0irst Ti*e

!n 193@, .aster +as invite' to ta&e art in the 'e'ication of a -i&h te)le in -toc&ton, California.aster too& +ith hi) %ina Parshell, :a)ala, #ony Diegle, -chra)), an' )yself We ha' to stan' at

least t+o hours at the 'oors till their co))ittee )a'e u their )in's +hether to have chairs in thete)le or not, an' ta&e the shoes off or not 5inally, the 'ecision +as conclu'e' an' everyone +al&e'in shoeless We follo+e' .aster in an' seate' ourselves aroun' hi) on the floor in the center of thete)le #o )y a)a>e)ent, ! sa+ that +e +ere the only la'ies in the te)le, for the -i&hs 'on7t allo+

+o)en in their te)les .aster ha' traine' )e to lay the sy)bols, +hile he laye' the har)oniu),so)eti)es his big 'ru) When it ca)e ti)e for .aster to lay his chant, he tol' )e to give thesy)bols to #ony #hen +ithout hesitation, .aster ic&e' u the big 'ru) an' lace' it in )y la,saying, 4Here you lay this4 ! +as never so 'u)bfoun'e', he laye' 4$h (o' Beautiful4 in Bengalian' ! laye' that 'ru) as if ! ha' laye' it all )y life .uch later, he tol' )e that ! laye' the 'ru) in)y revious !n'ian incarnation in his her)itage %o +on'er it ca)e to )e naturally #hereafter, until.aster7s .ahasa)a'hi, at all of .aster7s san&irtans an' )e'itations, ! laye' the 'ru) "n' if he

+ante' to lay the 'ru) or the sy)bols, ! laye' the har)oniu), for ! coul' lay it to satisfy histe)o He laye' the) so very +ell, it )a'e our laying soun', no 'oubt, a)ateurish to hi)

35



Sister ,o's

.aster sai' that in !n'ia they al+ays give the 'ifferent vo+s after an initiation, for the altar an' vibration are con'ucive to the occasion .rs C P Bissett beca)e -ister (yana)ata on July 2@, 1931 ! +as 'o+nstairs 'ecorating for the initiation that .aster +as giving that evening He ha' tol' herseveral 'ays before, that she coul' reare her )in' for the occasion "bout an hour before the

initiation, .aster calle' )e ustairs to his roo) an' as&e' )e, 4Ho+ +oul' you li&e to be )a'e a-ister tonightO4 .y ans+er +as, 4"ll right, but to )e ta&ing a vo+ of a -ister is a very sacre' thing, an'it is in )y heart an' )in' to be one, but 'on7t you thin& ! shoul' have ha' a fe+ 'ays rearation forthe sole)n occasionO !t is only a short ti)e before you start the service, ! a) 'irty fro) +or&ing,cleaning, 'ecorating, an' ! haven7t finishe' yet, but ! +ill 'o +hatever you say4 He ans+ere', 4*ou areright, you shoul' have a fe+ 'ays rearation at least, +e +ill leave the ublic cere)ony for so)e otherti)e4 He sai' 4ublic,4 because ! ha' ta&en the) fro) hi) rivately +ith -chra)) as each other7s

+itness ! 'on7t &no+ ho+ )any ti)es ! too& the -isterhoo' vo+s since then, for every ti)e a ne+,close 'iscile arrive' an' he gave the) their in'ivi'ual vo+s, ! al+ays +as inclu'e' in the circle in

+hich +e all oine' han's aroun' .aster, +hile +e reeate' the vo+ after hi) He often sai', 4*ou'on7t have to +ear a unifor), robes, or saris, +hile ! a) here, that can co)e after ! go to the !nfinite4

-ister (yana)ata is the one +ho starte' the +hite robe i'ea -he coul' not ut on her sari easily,therefore, she ha' +hite robes )a'e +hich +ere easy for her to sli on an' offN an', because she coul'not al+ays have her hair cut an' +ashe', she too& to +earing that +hite veil

Orange Ro(e

.any years ago, .aster gave )e one of his orange robes an' tol' )e ! ha' the right to +ear orange !can un'erstan' +hy +e coul' not have +orn orange +hile he +as alive, because he +ore the orangerobe, an' )any other reasons +hy +e shoul' not +ear it +hile he +as alive But since the ast year an'a half, he 'oes +ish us to +ear orange He has tol' )e to 'o so, that is +hy ! +ear it at )y )e'itation)eetings an' intervie+s

4i--erent +ro8ects

!n 1933, .aster ainte' the hea'?uarters for the first ti)e "n' in 193K, he urchase' the secon'te)le on 11 West 1th -treet !t +as also at this ti)e that .aster got a la+yer +ho coul' organi>ean' legally co)lete our church status .aster +as the resi'entN -ister (yana)ata, the ice Presi'entNichar' Wright, the -ecretaryN !, the #reasurer, an' all of us +ere on the Boar' of Directors, lus :arla-chra)) ! a) the only one left of the original officers an' 'irectors

!n 193K=1930, .aster ha' a ra'io rogra) every -un'ay at K<10 ) He gave a fifteen=)inutetal& He oene' the rogra) by laying the har)oniu), Daya the sy)bols, an' ! the big 'ru) " boy'river an' all of us sang the chant, 4Polestar4

%aster +ro*ises %e to 6o to India 'it /i*

During )y earlier years +ith .aster, he often use' to say, 4! +ill ta&e you to !n'ia +hen ! go ! +illsho+ you the her)itage +here you +ere +ith )e as a -ister, not a bloo' sister, in your reviousincarnation4 $ne 'ay, in 193@, he +as so elate', he +as ta&ing -chra)), Carson to 'rive thehousecar, an' )yself to Phoeni6 $ne of his stu'ents ha' invite' hi) to her 'esert retreat He see)e'articularly an6ious for )e to see it !t +as a beautiful -anish buil'ing +ith a atio in the center ! +asout in the atio enoying the at)oshere .aster ca)e to )y si'e an' as&e', 4What 'o you thin& ofthis lace an' +hat 'oes it )a&e you feel li&eO4 ! ans+ere' that it felt fa)iliar, as if ! ha' been herebefore He a''e', 4!t shoul', for it is al)ost the e6act relica of the her)itage in !n'ia +here you +ere

+ith )e, that ! +as telling you about4

36



%aster1s Trip to India

When .aster +as able to go to !n'ia in 1930, he very sa'ly tol' )e he coul' not ta&e )e +ith hi)Nbecause, in the first lace, he 'i' not have sufficient )oney, an', in the secon' lace, he 'i' not haveanyone else to ta&e charge of the organi>ation +hile he +as gone #he reason he ublishe' that -ister(yana)ata +as in charge +as because she +as )uch ol'er an' it +as better that an el'erly -ister be

na)e' Poor -ister 'i' not have office or other abilities, nor the hysical sta)ina to ta&e care of the)illion 'etails of office, financial, an' legal )atters, that ca)e u 'uring .aster7s year an' a halfabsence -ister (yana)ata an' ! +ere very close an' +e consi'ere' each other as als ! consulte' heron )atters ! &ne+ she, in her great +is'o), coul' an' +oul' hel )e +ith -he an' ! ha' .aster7so+er of attorney to ta&e care of all legal )atters ! ha' charge of Daya, .atai, an' -ailasuta, the onlyones here at that ti)e, an' sister +as over us all Ho+ hay .aster +as to learn through )y letters tohi) that ! ha' ai' off )any 'ebts of long stan'ing "n' that out of our oor ittance, ! +as able tosave enough to )ail hi) a certain a)ount of )oney for !n'ia When .aster first tol' )e ! coul' notgo to !n'ia, ! as&e' hi), 4Do you thin& ! +ill ever get to see your .asterO4 He coul' not ans+er, forhe &ne+ that -ri *u&tes+ari +as lanning to leave his bo'y, as .aster7s letter to aasi +ill in'icate.aster tol' )e later that he &ne+ ! +oul' not see -ri *u&tes+ari in this life, so he sai', 4! as&e' -ri

*u&tes+ari to sen' you a secial blessing4 "n' he 'i', 'uring the ti)e he left his bo'yN he ca)e to)e in a suerconscious 'rea) He touche' )y forehea' an' ! felt that sa)e electrical +ave co)ingfro) his han' into )y bo'y, creating a light of blessings He 'isaeare', an' then ! sa+ Jesus +al&inga+ay ! calle', 4.aster Jesus4 He turne' to face )e an' rona)e' an' )entione' )y na)e !t goes tosho+ that +e 'on7t have to go to !n'ia to receive blessings fro) those great souls !t +as also at thisti)e, +hen aasi +as visiting us an' +e +ere )e'itating +ith hi), ! oene' )y eyes ! sa+ Aahiri.ahasaya co)e out of aasi7s bo'y an' return in it again #hough ! 'i' not go +ith .aster to !n'ia, !ha' the satisfaction to &no+ he +ante' )e there, as his letters to )e +ill in'icate, un'er the file4.aster7s Aetters to Durga4 8!t +as also at this ti)e that aasi gave an' built the ncinitas her)itage,also, see this file un'er that title for )y art in this roect

!n 190@ an' 1901, again, .aster +as lanning a tri to !n'ia He again tol' )e he coul' not ta&e)e because )y health +oul' not er)it it, but ! also &ne+ ! ha' to re)ain to continue an' finish the'uties he ha' given )e of caring for aasi7s +elfare "s ti)e rove', neither +as our Belove' .asterable to go to his blesse' !n'ia, for Divine .other 'ee)e' other+ise ! have ha' )any offers to go to!n'ia since aasi7s assing, but .aster +ants )e to finish the +or& he has or'aine' that ! 'o before !go to !n'ia, or before this soul slis to oin hi) in his infinite abo'e, +herever that )ay be %ee'lessto say, ho+ )uch +e )isse' our blesse' (urui 'uring his absence We +ere li&e lost chil'ren, tryingto 'o the 'uties that every 'ay +ere brought to our attention, an' trying to 'o everything an' anythingthat +oul' lease hi) in every +ay *ou 'on7t nee' to use your i)agination to icture us +hen .aster,finally, +as to arrive at our shores We +ere besi'e ourselves +ith oyN the house +as cleane' fro) toto botto)

.aster ha' sent bo6es an' trun&s ahea', an' +e ut the) all in his library, a+aiting his return Hecalle' us fro) %e+ *or&N aasi +as here at that ti)e What oy it +as to hear his belove' voice againF.aster ha' lanne' for us to )eet hi) in -alt Aa&e City, tah, on %ove)ber 1, 193 .ar?uart'rove -ailasuta, Daya, .atai, an' .rs Wright, an' ! too& the train a fe+ 'ays later because ! ha' toatten' the last )inute 'etails for the her)itage ! got to -alt Aa&e the night of the 10th an' the ne6t)orning +e +ent to the station to ic& u .aster We coul' har'ly +ait We got there in goo' ti)e

#he station see)e' unusually ?uiet, ! thought, for a train to arrive When it ca)e ti)e, +e +ent outan' sa+ .aster hi'ing behin' a ost We all shoute' in unison, 4#here he isF4 an' ran as fast as ourlegs coul' carry us We all ca)e bac& in the station, .aster ha' us all sit in a bunch an' he sat in frontof us, laying +ith the Wrights7 an6iety, saying Dic& an' ttie ha' not co)e bac& an' an sorts of tales.aster ha' hi''en the) in another art of the station ! +ill never forget ho+ .aster sat loo&ing at

each one of us=His enetrating glance, as if he +as going +ithin our very souls to see +hat changes ha'ta&en lace 'uring his absence #hen Dic& an' ttie aeare' on the scene, as if fro) no+here an'

37



the Wrights u)e' +ith surrise to greet their brother an' son We ha' reserve' a roo) for .aster atthe %e+house Hotel, +here he ha' staye' revious ti)es He or'ere' ice crea) an' chocolate fu'gean' +e all ha' a treat We all sat on the floor hanging on every +or' he so&e, but he 'i' not say )uchfor he +as in+ar'ly busy analy>ing each one7s soul !t +as at this ti)e he as&e' about the ncinitasroerty 8see that file for 'etails, then he intervie+e' each one of us in'ivi'ually ! sat +ith sine

straight, rea'y to ans+er any ?uestion he +oul' fire at )e, but all he as&e' )e +as, 4Du, 'o you love)eO4 ! thre+ )yself at his feet an' crie' )y ans+er, an' he +as satisfie'

We re)aine' in -alt Aa&e a fe+ 'ays, then +e 'rove to Sion Canyon an' sa+ all the sights on the +ay bac& to Aos "ngeles .aster +ante' to go to -an 5rancisco to see if he coul' ersua'e #ara toco)e bac& to .t Washington to +or& on his boo&s $nly .aster an' ! boar'e' the train in Barsto+

We sent that evening an' late that night tal&ing of )any things #he ne6t )orning, ! +as busyac&ing .aster7s suitcase an' )ine When .aster ca)e out of the rest roo), he sa+ #ara sitting in oneof the seats, for she ha' boar'e' the train at $a&lan' to be +ith hi) in -an 5rancisco #hey greete' aslong lost frien's, an' tal&e' the rest of the +ay +hile ! continue' ac&ing an' getting our things rea'yfor our arrival in -an 5rancisco We ha' lunch +ith #ruth Burberry -trange, !, +ho have a goo')e)ory, cannot recall ho+ long, nor +hat else +e 'i' in -an 5rancisco, but it +as not for long +e

+ere there because .aster ha' acco)lishe' his )ission We returne' to Aos "ngeles for .aster7sho)eco)ing an' a ban?uet *ou can +ell i)agine everyone7s elation at seeing our Belove' .asteragain

$ur ne6t thrill +as +hen .aster oene' all his bo6es an' trun&s .aster +as al+ays so thoughtfulof everyoneN the bo6es +ere loa'e' +ith to&en )e)entos fro) all over the +orl' an' !n'ia #hatChrist)as, he really loa'e' us +ith gifts fro) !n'ia an' else+here He gave )e three saris, one yello+

+ith a blac& bor'er of cree, a +hite sil& +ith a re' bor'er, an' )y favorite an' his, the sari ! +eareach Christ)as since that )e)orable one of 193 ! +ell re)e)ber ho+ .aster blesse' each one ofhis close 'isciles on the forehea' +ith his finger, saying, 4:ali is +riting Her na)e in fla)es on yourforehea's4 What blessingsF Ho+ can such little ones as ourselves co)rehen' the greatness of such a

Christ=li&e soul as our .aster +as an' is

%an$ !o(s

.y life has al+ays been one ob after another !t +as either carentry, 'esigning, 'rafting, electrician,lu)bing, lastering, gar'ening, cleaning houses insi'e or out, an' buil'ing ! li&e )achinery ! +or&e'in the rint sho ! 'on7t thin& there are )any obs or line of +or& ! 'i' not 'o 'uring )y trainingyears +ith .aster an' even after his .ahasa)a'hi .aster often use' to say to )e, 4Du is living )anylives in this one4 When he +as e6tra lease' +ith )y +or& or )y behavior, he use' to call )e 4Du(ug,4 other ti)es he calle' )e Durga, or, )ore often, 4Du4, for short He has often tol' )e that !

+as living on borro+e' ti)e

Ta8 %aal Repair

!n 19K1, +hen .aster returne' fro) bac& ast, he brought bac& +ith hi) a 'elicate #a .ahal relica, +hich is no+ in his hall+ay in .t Washington He ha' cautione' everyone that 'rove the car to be very careful going over bu)s, so as not to brea& the #a .ahal he ha' in the trun& When aasi ca)eto visit after .aster ca)e ho)e, he ha' the #a on his 'es& in his library .aster as&e' )e to close the'raes so that he coul' sho+ aasi the #a lit ! reache' for the cor', as ! 'i' so, )y ar) struc& thecorner of the #a an' &noc&e' it on the floor !t soun'e' as if it ha' bro&en into a )illion ieces as

+as )y heartN as ! ic&e' u the ieces, it loo&e' li&e it too .aster 'i' not say a +or' Aater, ! tol'.aster ! +oul' fin' so)e+here to have it )en'e' an' ! +oul' ay for it ! 'i' not &no+ +here to go,so ! too& the ieces to )y roo) an' got the i'ea of using laster of Paris ! glue' the ieces ! coul',

an' built ne+ ieces .aster ca)e in +hile ! +as +or&ing, June "'a)s +as +ith )e, an' she as&e'hi), 4Ho+ 'oes she 'o itO4 .aster ans+ere', 4Du can 'o anything she uts her )in' to because shealies concentration4

38



"fter it +as ut together the laster loo&e' 'ull, +hile the rest +as glossy #he i'ea ca)e to )e touse clear araffin +a6 ! )elte' so)e an' covere' the 'ull arts +ith +a6 $ne coul' not tell +herethe reairs +ere )a'e, )uch to .aster7s an' )y satisfaction

I Ask To 4o a /undred Kri$as

! ha' often hear' .aster raise a )an for 'oing )any :riyas a 'ay ! thought if .aster is lease' +ithhi), )aybe ! shoul' be able to 'o li&e+ise $ne 'ay, ! gleefully as&e' .aster, 4-ir, can ! 'o a hun're':riyas a 'ayO4 His eyes got bigger an' he shoute', 4"re you cra>yO4 Well, ! sai', 4*ou al+ays raise'.r .arcus for 'oing )ore :riyas4 He ans+ere', 4#hat is not for you, stic& to the nu)ber you are'oing, that is all4 ! never trie' that again

6ra$ +ulled Out o- %$ /air

!n 19K1, ! +as sitting on the floor in front of .aster He +as tal&ing to us He su''enly reali>e' ho+gray )y hair +as "s he tal&e', he ulle' one gray hair in front of )y hea', an' then another Hecontinue' to 'o this for al)ost t+o hours Aater, he use' to often re)ar& +ith oy, 4Du7s blac& strea&

of hair is still there, because ! ulle' the gray ones out +ith )y +ill4 #he gray hair 'i' not gro+ bac&until after his .ahasa)a'hi

%$ 4i--erent Incarnations

-ea&ing of reincarnation, .aster tol' )e once that ! +as a 'ancing girl in a te)le, an' also, at oneti)e, ! +as guillotine' for the sa&e of religion When ! first ca)e to .t Washington, he use' to give)e an ale or a banana to hol' an' eat ! never &ne+ +hy for )any years Aater, he tol' )e thereason !t +as because he li&e' to see )e hol' those articles +ith only )y first three fingers an' theother t+o fingers +oul' stic& +ay out #his brought bac& )e)ories to his )in' of )y te)le 'uties

+hen ! +as in an !n'ian te)le offering incense an' flo+ers on the altar

Corrections

! re)e)ber once +hen .aster +as scol'ing )e, ! 'on7t recall the inci'ent for there +ere so )any,because ! fully 'eserve' the), but to this one in articular, ! ans+ere', 4"fter all, -ir, ! a) a gro+n

+o)an4 His face beca)e crestfallen an' he ans+ere', 4! +ish you ha'n7t sai' that, because ! never seeyou all as gro+n +o)en but as chil'ren of (o'4 Believe )e, ! never sai' that again

! +asn7t +ithout )y share of scol'ing, for ! ha' a lot of &nots to untie "s .aster use' to say, hiso+n (uru bro&e every sychological bone in his bo'y, an' than& goo'ness that our .aster +as &in'an' thoughtful enough to brea& all the sychological bones of )y )in' ! receive' )any, )any,'eserving corrections an' if it ha'n7t been for those an' his constant vigilance, ! +oul'n7t be hereto'ay, because +ithout those i)artial, i)ersonal, an' righteous corrections, one cannot rogress on

the siritual, )ental, or hysical ath ! 'eserve' )uch )ore than ! actually receive', for he +as so)erciful an' ever so forgiving, even +ithout as&ing for forgiveness, if +e sho+e' re)orse an' acte' torove our sincere effort to 'o better

I Take a Silence Nigt

ea'ing about .ahat)a (an'hi7s silence 'ay, ! 'eci'e' to have a 'ay of silence )yself Joyously, ! +ent to .aster an' tol' hi) of )y lans that ! +ante' to ta&e all 'ay #hurs'ays for )y silence 'ayHis ans+er +as, 4What, ta&e a +hole +or&ing 'ay, you ta&e it fro) to 12 )i'night on #hurs'aynights instea'4 ! starte' that, after several +ee&s, .aster 'eci'e' he +ante' to have a silent night tooHe too& -atur'ay nights ! change' )y night to confor) to his !f he )isse' -atur'ays, he +oul' ta&eit -un'ay nights His life, ho+ever, +as not his o+n "n' since his every )o)ent +as a 'e'ication an'service to (o', an' )e'itation to Hi), it +as really not necessary for hi), but he continue' it for along ti)e

39



Part ThreeI %o)e to .ncinitas

-ince aasi ha' built an aart)ent for hi)self ne6t to .aster7s in the her)itage, it +as a surein'ication that he +as going to )a&e it his future hea'?uarters, +hich greatly lease' .aster, for it +asan assurance that aasi +oul' be co)ing to ncinitas instea' of going to 5lori'a for his retreats

#herefore, .aster +as 'eter)ine' to give hi) all the co)forts of ho)e, hence, he aointe' )e tota&e care of his ersonal +elfare in early Dece)ber 193

!n early January 193, .aster sent -r (yana)ata an' )e to live at the her)itage Ho+ +ell !re)e)ber this inci'ent ! +as sitting on the floor of )y .t Washington roo), the one ne6t to hisbe'roo), +hich ! ha' occuie' after a fe+ )onths of )oving to the hea'?uarters ! +as ac&ing )ynecessary ossessions +hen .aster ca)e in, sy)athetically atte' )e on the hea' saying, 4%ever)in' Du, you +ill have )any roo)s to live in so)e'ay4 "t the her)itage, ! +as given the best roo)in the north en' +here .atai an' guests no+ occuy ! +as not, ho+ever, able to re)ain in it for too

long at one ti)e, for .aster invite' so )any guests an' he +oul' +ant the) to have the best -o, out ! +ent, bag in han', so fre?uently that ! sel'o) occuie' this lovely roo) 5ro) 193 to 1939, ! literallylive' in every roo) in the house, +hich +as available, or in closets, 'ra+ing roo)s, o+'er roo), orany+here there +as a sace large enough for this shell to lie on ! really 'i' not have a lace ! coul' call)y o+n to )e'itate in

I Build %$ Roo* at te /er*itage

$ne 'ay, ! got a bright i'ea to 'ig )yself a cave, so at least ! +oul' have a lace to )e'itate, for eventhe )e'itation caves +ere occuie' ! gleefully tol' .aster +hat ! +as 'oing He as&e' )e, 4WhereO4 !tol' hi) that ! tie' a heavy roe on the cave fence an' sli' 'o+n the roe, half+ay 'o+n to the beachcliff +here no one coul' reach )e ! +ill never forget .asters eyes of e6tre)e surrise as he shoute',4"re you cra>yF *ou +ill brea& your nec& or fall 'o+n to the beach on the roc&s belo+4 ! can assureyou ! never sli' 'o+n that roe again, but that action starte' the )otion to buil' a roo) for )yselfso)e+here .aster tol' )e to loo& aroun' to see if ! coul' buil' a roo) in the her)itage so)e+herefor )yself ! foun' the base)ent un'erneath aasi7s aart)ent suitable for the urose +ithout too)uch e6ense, +here lu)bing +oul' be available for a bathroo) Castillo, .anuel, an' )yself 'ugout the suorting footing an' lace' a streetcar steel rail in for suort We oure' concrete +allsan' floor, )a'e an insi'e stair+ay out of the hall closet, a bathroo), even an interco) an' outsi'ehone !, at last, ha' a roo) ! 'i' not have to give u, because .aster 'i' not +ant guests on his an'aasi7s en' of the her)itage ! coul' also be the +atch)an for that en' of the her)itage, +hile -ister

+as +atching the other en' .y roo) +as co)lete' in July 1939 ! re)e)ber the first night ! +asgoing to slee in )y ne+ roo) !t +as an e6tre)ely hot 'ay .aster ca)e 'o+n to )y ne+ roo) an'sent the +hole 'ay, for it +as the coolest roo) in the house, hence, )y roo) +as 'ivinely initiate' byhis sacre' resence

Ser)ices to %aster in te /er*itage

! re)aine' at the her)itage continuously for seven years During these first years at the her)itage,.aster use' to co)e often an' for long erio's at a ti)e, +hile aasi )a'e relatively fe+ visits an'for only a +ee& or ten 'ays at one ti)e ven +hen aasi +as at the her)itage an' 'i' not occuy all)y ti)e, ! continue' )y ersonal services to .asterN coo&e' for hi), an' every -un'ay, .aster invite't+enty to t+enty=five guests after the services for lunch ! cleane' the te)leN ! too& the boo& table,an' receive' guests at the te)le an' visitors that ca)e to see the her)itage "fter aasi retire', !

use' to go to .aster7s ?uarters, until he tol' )e to retire, +hich so)eti)es +as as late as 3 or K a) #here +ere )any other 'uties +hen aasi +as not at the her)itage !t +as )y rivilege to go +ith

40



.aster on his nursery or leasure tris, or go to the beach +ith hi) an' hel carry his )oonstonesN 'ohis coo&ing an' acco)any hi) on his +al&sN ro+e' in the te)le oolN s+a) in the s+i))ing ool

+ith .aster an' other 'isciles ! +or&e' si'e=by=si'e +ith .aster buil'ing the (ol'en Aotus #e)le8see file on sa)e or carrie' on 'uring his absence to Aos "ngeles, ! fe' the fish +hen he 'i' not havethe ti)e or +as absent, loo&e' after the guests, ainte' the rust off the )etal fra)e of the Win'o+s,

an' chec&e' an' ai' the bills #he real estate )an, .r Willis, an' ! +or&e' together on the urchaseof all the lots an' real estate in general "fter a fe+ years, Daya too& over the aying of the bills, an'several years later, -ra''ha too& over that ob an' the real estate #he )en ainte' the rusty sots onthe buil'ing, hence, relieve' )e of these 'uties When the first lan'sli'e occurre', ! +or&e' +ith the)en an' suervise' that ob ! +as at .t Washington +hen the te)le fell ! returne' to see that all

+as salvage' an' ut in a roer lace 8see the file on ncinitas roerties, etc for )y art in each ofthese roects

I %ake a %attress -or %aster

.aster so sel'o) co)laine' about anything that +e too& notice +hen he 'i' ! hear' hi) say, 4Why'ont the co)anies )a&e )attresses longerO4 ! un'erstoo' +hat he )eant, so +hile he +as in Aos

"ngeles, ! bought all the )aterials an' ha' Castillo buil' a +oo' e6tension to his *ogi be' an' ! )a'ea s)all )attress e6tension, srings an' all Castillo an' ! +ere still +or&ing on it an' ha' it finishe' ustbefore .aster stee' into his be'roo) Castillo an' ! ha' it as a surrise for hi) Ho+ lease', an'ho+ )uch he enoye' using it an' areciate' the love that )otivate' the act

%$ Trips Back and 0ort to Los Angeles

When .aster +as at .t Washington, ! use' to )a&e several train tris a )onth to see an' be +ithhi) !f he +as at the her)itage, he +oul' sen' )e to Aos "ngeles to loo& for 'ifferent things for theher)itage or the te)le ! ?uote a note .aster +rote to )e

JA* 12, 193; E Dear Du< .on'ay afternoon to)orro+ ositively start for here, i)ortant)atters on han' to be acco)lishe', +hen you reach the station, call u, +e +ill get you #ryto reach by 1 o7cloc& Blessings very sincerely yours

E P *oganan'a

$n one of these occasions, ! ha' a very severe chest col' .aster ca)e 'o+n to )y roo)N ! canstill see hi) no+ sitting on the chair He loo&e' at )e for a )o)ent, then as&e' )e if ! +oul' go toAos "ngeles to get so)ething he +ante' for the te)le fro) a store in A" He a''e', 4Castillo +ill'rive you *ou can lie on the bac& seat an' co)e right bac&4 ! agree' to go "fter he left )y roo), hesent Woo'y to hel )e 'ress an' get rea'y ! +as tuc&e' in +ith blan&ets, illo+s, an' lai' on the bac&seat Castillo +as +orrie'N ! coul' see hi) +atching )e fro) his rear )irror When +e got to A", !

+ent into the store !t only too& a fe+ )inutes an' ! ca)e bac&, too& )y for)er osition on the bac&seat, an' +ent bac& to the her)itage By the ti)e ! got there, ! +as ractically +ell

%aster1s ,ision o- !esus and te Calice

When .aster ha' his vision of Jesus +ith the chalice, ! +as resent +hen he tol' us about it .astersai', 4! +on'er +hy Jesus )a'e )e 'rin& fro) the chaliceO4 #he +or's ca)e out of )y )outh before! &ne+ it, saying, 4#hat is because you are 'rin&ing fro) the sa)e cu of +is'o) as Christ4 .asterloo&e' at )e an' sai', 4Jesus ans+ere' )e through you4

+ro8ects

!n 19K2, .aster +ante' )e to hel hi) buil' the Holly+oo' church, so ! staye' at .t Washington to +or& until after the 'e'ication of the church 8see the file on Holly+oo' church for )y art in this

41



roect #hen in 19K3, ! starte' on the -an Diego church, hence, ! ca)e bac& to the her)itage an''rove bac& an' forth to -an Diego until it7s 'e'ication 8see the file on the -an Diego church for )yart on this roect

!n 19K1, .aster brought : Das fro) bac& east +ith hi), an' ut hi) in charge of the officeHe +as an a)bitious erson for the +or& an' 'i' very +ell He )a'e )any +on'erful an' goo'

changes in the office .aster +as very lease' +ith hi) !n 19KK, 'uring the !n'ia fa)ine, .astercreate' an !n'ia 5a)ine 5un', an' +ante' hun're's of letters )aile' for 'onations for that urose-ri Das ha' the letters )aile' for a+hile When he sa+ the )oney ouring in for !n'ia, he +ante' to&ee that )oney for the office an' not sen' it to !n'ia, nor 'i' he +ant to continue the )ailing.aster, +ho al+ays ha' a soft sot for his belove' !n'ia, +as 'islease' +ith Das for )a&ing such astate)ent .aster &ne+ )y heart +as for !n'ia He calle' )e in fro) ncinitas, saying, 4! +ant you tota&e over that 'eart)ent for !n'ia, an' )ail all the letters you can4 ! +or&e' fro) )orning untilevenings ust )ailing these aeal letters, hun're's a 'ay, for ! +as a fast +or&er .aster +as )orethan lease' +ith )y +or& an' the results it acco)lishe', but Das +as not so lease', an' 'i' notli&e )y shar eyes in the office either He co)laine' to .aster that ! 'i' nothing else but sen' thoseletters an' ! shoul' 'o other +or& instea' .aster ans+ere' hi), 4#hat is the reason ! lace' her in

that 'eart)ent to 'o )y +ishes, since you 'on7t +ant to 'o it4 Das got on his high horse an' trie' tofrighten .aster by saying, 4"ll right then, ut her in charge of the office, ! a) leaving4 .asteri))e'iately too& hi) u on that, an' Das ans+ere', 4"ll right, ! +ill4 ! +as 'u)bfoun'e' +hen.aster tol' )e all this, an' that he +as lacing )e in charge of the office #he roce'ures an' office

+or& ha' gro+n so ! tol' .aster ! +ill 'o )y best, but you +ill have to +or& through )e, because allthese things have change' ! +as goo' at follo+ing or'ers, +or&ing an' 'irecting, an' ha' creativeabilities, but ! 'i' not thin& ! ha' creative abilities in business an' office roce'ures, an' ! +ar)e'.aster of this lac& .aster ans+ere', 4#hat is all ! +ant you to 'o is carry out )y instructions an' 'oyour best, leave the rest to )e4 ! sai', 4"ll right then, ! 'on7t &no+ enough about it to feel that it is )ylace, an' ! +ont feel ba'ly if at anyti)e you fin' so)eone else +ho +ill have that ability to relace)e4 ! ?uote a fe+ of .aster7s notes to aasi regar'ing )y office +or&

"P!A 2;, 19KK E !t is surrising ho+ Du is heling in the office, +hy 'i'nt ! thin& of itbefore, she gets things 'one an' has no +ishes of her o+n to obstruct )y +ishes for thegoo' of the +or& ! a) very lease' P*

."* 12, 19KK E Du is roving +on'erful in carrying out the +or& in every +ay ! al+ays +on'er +hy ! 'i'n7t thin& of this beforeN she is hu)ble an' conscientious an' has the greateste6a)le in hu)bleness an' racticality in )y Belove' in you Du gets things 'one an' neverbrea&s +or' given to )e or tries to get a+ay fro) fulfilling ro)ises ! +ishe' all othersbefore ha' 'one so, then this +or& +oul' have been all over this earth P*

! +or&e' in the office fro) 19KK to 19K; During that ti)e )y bo'y +as giving )e )ore an')ore trouble, an' after .ay, 19K, aasi sent at least four to five )onths in the +inter )onths atncinitas, an' three )onths or )ore in the su))er )onths ! ha' to leave the office for that erio'an' ta&e it u again +here ! left off, but this is not the +ay to run an office .aster reali>e' that ! coul'not 'o ustice to either the office or ncinitas, therefore, 'eci'e' to ut Daya in charge of the office, !)ust say a very +ise 'ecision !, again, )ove' bac& to ncinitas an' gave u )y roo) ! ha' the one.rs Wright is no+ occuying

!t +as also in 19K;, that +e all e6erience' a very )e)orable inci'ent .aster ha' an e6tre)ely'ee ecstasy $ne noon, aroun' June 1th, ! +ent to our s)all &itchen to eat, ! sit 'o+n but ! coul'nteat ! left the table an' +ent 'irectly to .aster7s roo) He +as sitting alone on the 'avenort an' ! sit

near hi), he sai', 4-it a little )ore 'istant a+ay, Divine .other 'oesn7t +ant anyone to touch )e4 Hebegan to tal& of his love for Divine .other $ne by one, each of the 'ose 'isciles ca)e He tol' us

42



later, that he 'i' not +ant to call anyone, that -he +oul' have to call those -he +ante' Herself, an'-he 'i' "fter !, ca)e Daya, .atai, -ailasuta an' Woo'y He ha' us call the Ae+ises to co)e tooN it

+as the first ti)e +e ha' seen hi) in such a 'ifferent ecstasy He tal&e' alou' to Divine .other, an'-he +oul' use his voice to ans+er hi) bac& alou', so +e coul' hear it all Divine .other too& eachone by our na)es an' +oul' tell us +hat each one7s faults +ere, an' .aster7s ten'er heart +oul' co)e

to our 'efense Daya too& so)e notes Divine .other lai' us lo+ an' )any others +ho +ere notresent, accor'ing to each ones7 ust 'eserve ! re)e)ber )y scol'ing very +ell ! ha' to give u )yroo) either at .t Washington or, in articular, at ncinitas for guests " little +hile bac&, ! +as as&e'to give )y roo) u at .t Washington for a guest again, an' for the first ti)e, ! )a'e a fuss about itDivine .other +as ta&ing )e on the caret for that, saying, 4Du +as selfish an' +oul'nt give herroo) u4 .aster ans+ere', 4Please .other, 'on7t unish her -he has al+ays been unselfish an' is )yal, an' you &no+ she ta&es on the sins of others, 'ont unish her, .other4 ach one +ithoute6cetion got a lesson +e never forgot Can you i)agine +hat this 'i' to )a&e us 'eely re)orsefulO

We crie' so )uch an' for so long, that +e +ere as listless as coul' be "fter three 'ays an' nights ofthis crying an' hearing all these conversations fro) .aster to Divine .other an' vice versa, ! ha' togo to ncinitas overnight He continue' his tal&ing in the sa)e )anner +hile ! +as gone arly that

)orning, Daya calle' )e to say that ! ha' better co)e i))e'iately, they feare' .aster +as going toleave the bo'y ! 'rove so fastN ! )a'e it in a short ti)e ! 'i' not feel the 'riving at all When ! sai' tohi), 4! a) sorry, ! +as not here last night4 He loo&e' at )e an' ans+ere', 4*ou +ere here, ! sa+you4 $ne or )ore of us +ere in constant atten'ance, night an' 'ay

$ne 'ay, +hile ! +as +or&ing in the office, .aster got a letter fro) one of the office +or&ersco)laining about )y actions, an' a''e' that ! ha' no e'ucation an' ! +as !gnorant When he rea'the note to )e, ! ans+ere' that she +as right, ! have no e'ucation He very in'ignantly ans+ere',4*ou )ay not have an e'ucation, but you are not !gnorant Aoo& at )e, ! 'on7t &no+ nglish beyon'the arts of seech, but loo& +hat the Aor' is +riting through )e -o)e'ay, you too +ill +rite4 ! 'i'not reali>e ho+ )uch this note ha' hurt hi), because so)eone ha' calle' one of his chil'ren ignorant,until this one night +hen ! +as ta&ing )y turn in atten'ance to .aster 'uring his great ecstasy ! sit on

the floorN he began to 'ictate to )e ! only ha' a very s)all crac& fro) the closet light to light )y a'an' ! ha' to ta&e it in long han' He 'ictate' for a long ti)e "t the en' of the 'ictation, he sai', an' !?uote, 4June 2@, 19K; "n ignorant but loving (o' secretly +as chosen to ta&e this 'ictation fro)intellectual ignorant )yself4 He also sai', 4Divine .other +ante' )e to 'ictate to you all this to roveto that erson that you are not ignorant because you are the one +ho is ta&ing this 'o+n not she4 !still have )y original han'+ritten notes as +ell as the tye+ritten transcrition +hich ! tye'i))e'iately in or'er not to forget +hat he ha' 'ictate' an' +hile )y notes +ere still fresh in )y )in'

Li-e 0orce Tries to Lea)e %$ Bod$

"t this ti)e, .aster 'i' not care to eat, not even )angoes, +hich he love' so +ell 5or +ee&s after, the

least little re)in'er +oul' recall his ecstatic sa)a'hi His 'ear bo'y +as suffering so)eone else7s ain "s he stoo' to go out of the roo) his bo'y s+aye', ! ?uic&ly hel' hi) so he +oul' not fall "s ! 'i'so, ! 'eely raye' that Divine .other +oul' ass his suffering into )e -everal 'ays later, ! ca)e'o+n +ith the sa)e sy)to)s he ha', an' his bo'y +as relieve' $n July 1, aroun' five o7cloc& in the)orning, ! felt a tre)en'ous sha&ing of )y bo'y, it felt li&e a chill, but it +as so)ething far )oresevere an' 'ifferent ! trie' to call .rs Wright, +ho +as loo&ing after )e an' +ho live' across thehall, but ! coul' not get any resonse #he sha&ing beca)e )ore violent ! tol' )yself, 4*ou )ustcontrol this, or it +ill run a+ay +ith you4 #he violence cease', but it ca)e bac& at intervals Aater, that)orning, +hen .atai ca)e to see ho+ ! +as for .aster, ! tol' her of )y e6erience -he in turn tol'.aster He ca)e to )y 'oor +ith a )as& on ! begge' hi), 4Please -ir, you better not co)e in, this)ight be contagious, an' ! +oul'n7t +ant you to get it4 He re)aine' in the 'oor+ay as ! as&e' hi)

+hat the sha&ing +as He ans+ere', 4!t +as the Aife 5orce trying to leave your bo'y4 ! further sai',4"nyti)e Divine .other +ants to ta&e )e, ! a) rea'y to go4 He sa'ly loo&e' at )e an' sai', 4%o,

43



you have a lot of +or& to 'o yet4 Blesse' (urui again save' this shell fro) leaving this +orl' He ha'his reasons an' ! no+ &no+ the) very clearly too

On /and 'en %aster is Ill

! staye' another si6 )onths in 190@, to ta&e care of .aster 'uring his suffering for others7 &ar)a, or

+hen he suffere', ! see)e' to al+ays be on han' ! ?uote an e6cert of a note he +rote )e

$C#$B 13, 19K2 E ! +as lai' u for eight 'ays +ith ol' sore foot trouble, +ish you +erehere to loo& after )e in your )atchless +ay

.aster use' to call )e 4sensation secialist,4 because ! coul' fin' the trouble an' have a finetouch, he al+ays sai', 4Aet Du 'o it, she &no+s4 ! have 'eliberately &et )y ersonal services to.aster an' -5 +or& at ncinitas an' .t Washington searate, that you )ay better un'erstan' )y'uties to an' for aasi, +hich .aster gave )e, +hich are e6resse' in the follo+ing ages, as +ell as)y ersonal feelings for .aster, +hich are +ritten in )y biograhy of .aster

44



Part !our %$ Ser)ices to and -or Ra8asi !anakananda per %aster1s Re5uest and "ises

!n Dece)ber, 193, an' after .aster ha' given )e the 'uties of loo&ing after aasi7s ersonalco)forts an' +elfare at ncinitas an' .t Washington, ! ?uestione', 4Why )eO4 He relate' +hat ha'transire' in the first fe+ !ntervie+s he ha' +ith aasi in :ansas City in 1932 .aster sai', 4! +astal&ing +ith .r Aynn 8aasi, he +as telling )e of his ho)e life an' the service he +as receiving fro)servants, etc, an' +hile he +as tal&ing Divine .other sho+e' )e your astral face near his, that is

+hen ! tol' .r Aynn, 7so)e'ay ! +ill sho+ you +hat real, unselfish service is li&e,7 ! &ne+ then thatDivine .other +as telling )e to have you care for hi), an' you +oul' be able to hel )e to hel hi)! e6ect )uch of you, ! trust you +ith )y life ! &no+ it +ill be har' on you, but ! +ill gui'e an'rotect you, you )ust not let Divine .other an' )e 'o+n4 When .aster left for !n'ia, he instructe')e, as his letters +ill in'icate, to serve .r Aynn +ith Daya as chaeron, but after .aster +as bac&

+ith us again, ! serve' aasi alone, because .aster +as here an' )y greatest rotection He +atche'over )e an' 'irecte' )e accor'ing to his +ishes in all )atters Ho+ grateful ! +as, an' still a), for hisever=+atchful eyes, both hysically, sychologically, an' above all, siritually

#his service involve' such 'uties as coo&ing, shoing, an' ac&ing an' unac&ing his suitcases.aster ha' )a'e )e very conscious of ho+ )eticulously clean aasi +as #herefore, ! )a'e secialeffort to &ee his aart)ent sotless at all ti)es ! ha' to 'ust, vacuu), +ash floors an' Win'o+s,olish furniture, arrange flo+ers, etc When he +as resent, ! ha' to change sheets every 'ay $nce ina+hile, ! receive' a little hel fro) .anuel7s +ife to clean the house

"earing a /ousecoat

#rying to &ee aasi7s aart)ent free fro) the other &itchen7s coo&ing o'or, esecially curry co)inginto his aart)ent, +as a 'efinite chore He 'i' not )in' his o+n coo&ing o'ors, for they +ere solain, but all the Win'o+s an' 'oors +ere &et +i'e oen, even on col' +inter 'ays to have fresh airat all ti)es ! use' to be so col' all the ti)e, ! ha' to &ee 'resse' +ar), an' in or'er to &ee )y legs

+ar), ! +ore housecoats 'o+n to )y an&les $ne 'ay, .aster as&e' )e, 4Why 'o you al+ays +earthose long 'resses, you loo& funny in the)4 ! ans+ere', 4! a) col', -ir #he other girls +ear slac&saroun' the house to &ee their legs +ar), but ! 'on7t li&e those things, an' aasi &ees the aart)ent)uch col'er than even the rest of the house, so that ! nee' +ar) clothing4

$ne 'ay, soon after that inci'ent, .aster ca)e into aasi7s living roo) to )e'itate +ith hi), heha' his ac&et on an' he sit 'o+n +hile +aiting for aasi to co)e out of his bathroo) .aster as&e')e to get his sha+l, saying, 4Why 'oes he &ee it so col' in hereO4 ! ?uic&ly too& this oortunity tooint out to .aster )y 'ress roble), saying, 4*ou see -ir, you are here only for a short ti)e in this

col' roo) an' you +ant so)ething +ar)er an' )ore to +ear ! a) in it all the ti)e, that is the reason! +ear those housecoats to &ee +ar)4 .aster never sai' another +or' about )y long 'ressesany)ore He sa+ )y oint an' reason an' +as satisfie'

Ra8asi1s Sense o- S*ell

aasi ha' a suer sense of s)ell, an' he +oul' not hesitate telling )e if he 'i' not li&e certain o'ors,esecially if it ca)e fro) the other en' of the her)itage ! ha' to &ee )y erson clean an' not evenuse erfu)es, for everything aroun' aasi ha' to be natural !n or'er to avoi' further conflicts fro)the other &itchen coo&ing, ! thought of the i'ea of buil'ing a +all #his, ! thought, +oul' also give.aster )ore rivacy for the 'isciles, an' his co)ing an' going to his o+n ?uarters at all hours of 'ayor night #his solve' )any o'or an' other roble)s for )e as +ell

45



I Learn to 4ri)e

Prior to 19K3, ! 'i' not &no+ ho+ to 'rive a car .aster ha' often e6resse' a 'esire that ! learn to'rive, but since he 'i' not ress the oint, ! 'i' not +ish to a'' )ore to )y alrea'y heavy +or&ingsche'ule Ho+ever, 'uring the Jaanese War, in 19K3, gas an' tires +ere ratione' aasi 'i' not havehis o+n car at ncinitas at that ti)e When he infor)e' us of his co)ing visit, ! too& the train to Aos

"ngeles to get fresh foo' sulies #hen either -ailasuta or Castillo 'rove )e to the airort or therailroa' station to ic& aasi u an' 'rive hi) to ncinitas #hen the 'river ha' to ta&e the train orbus bac& to Aos "ngeles again #his roce'ure +as reeate' +hen it ca)e ti)e for aasi to leave$ne 'ay, aasi an' ! +ere 'iscussing the har'shi this i)ose' on .aster an' the 'rivers aasioffere' to teach )e ho+ to 'rive an' encourage )e to learn by a''ing, 4We +ill &ee it a secret, an'the ne6t ti)e .aster +ants )e at .t Washington, you can 'rive an' surrise .aster by saying thatyou 'rove )e4 very 'ay, thereafter, he )a'e )e 'rive He +as a goo' teacher We 'rove on the bac&roa's of ncinitas countrysi'e, to avoi' the high+ay in the beginning He +oul' not let )e )iss one'ay for he sai', 4!t +oul' be har'er to start again4 ! learne' on the ol' Buic&, the seat +as set forlong=legge' 'rivers, an' aasi forgot to tell )e that the seat coul' be a'uste' to suit any length .ylegs are so short that ! ha' 'ifficulty in reaching the clutch ! thought, 4! +ill never enoy 'riving if !

have to ull )yself out of shae every ti)e ! have to change fro) clutch to bra&e4 ! 'i' not feelsecure at the +heel .uch later, aasi notice' that the seat +as too far for )e He ulle' the lever toa'ust the seat, an' ! )ust say ! +as greatly relieve' to be able to touch )y feet s?uarely on thei)le)ents of the car When aasi tol' .aster that, ! ha' 'riven hi) 'o+n, .aster shoute' +ith oy,for it relieve' his )in' fro) rovi'ing a 'river, lus traveling e6enses Henceforth, 'riving 'uties

+ere a''e' to )y service to aasi Day or night, ! 'rove hi) +herever he +ante' to go, bac& an'forth to the airort or stations .aster ha' his o+n regular 'riversN therefore, ! only 'rove hi) onseveral occasions During the +ar, +e coul' not e6cee' the 30=)ile see' li)it on the high+ays #hishele' )e to thoroughly learn before the see' li)it +as raise' ! +ill never forget the ti)e ! ha' left)y urse +ith )y gas ration car' in it on the fen'er of the car +hile ! +as utting ac&ages in the car!t +as returne' the ne6t 'ay, ho+ever, through .aster7s rayers ! surely nee'e' that gas ration car'

%$ Li-ting "eigts Be$ond %$ Strengt

.aster 'i' not allo+ aasi to carry light or heavy +eights #he one +ho 'i' the 'riving also hele'carry his suitcases, foo' bo6es, etc in an' out of the car to its 'estination .y 'oing the 'riving alsoa''e' )y having to loa' an' unloa' the car, u an' 'o+n stes alone .ost of the ti)e the loa's fare6cee'e' )y strength but .asters blessings an' )y +illingness enable' )e to 'o so -r (yana)ataoften tol' )e, 4When ! see you bent +ith such heavy loa's, )y heart +as rone to rebellion, but )y)in' ?uic&ly tol' )e that .asters blessings are uon you for this service no )atter ho+ heavy theyare4

Whenever ! felt ! 'i' not +ant to 'o this or that, ! +oul' recall +hat .aster often tol' )e,

4e)e)ber +hatever you 'o goo' or ba' +ill reflect on )e4 !f )y )in' rebelle' at ti)es, )y heart +oul' say, 4Dont let .aster 'o+n4

! re)e)ber one 'ay ! 'i' not ic& u a beach to+el aasi use' to lie on the la+n, +hich he ha'left after he ha' co)e in the house in the evenings Aater, .aster tol' )e that aasi ha' co)laine'about it to hi) ! ans+ere', 4.y gosh -ir, can7t he even ic& u one little to+el for hi)selfO4 .astergently e6laine' to )e that he ha' a'vise' aasi to hel )e instea' of co)laining, an' .asterointe' out the +is'o) of his a'vice, 4Whatever you 'o reflects on )e, for he co)laine' to )e an' !got the rebuff not you4 #hereafter, ! +as e6tre)ely careful that .aster +oul' not have to go throughthat again, but aasi also correcte' hi)self an' 'i' not further co)lain to .aster or )e !f it ha' notbeen for .aster7s blessings, ! coul' 'o nothing, for this shell of a bo'y +as never very strong, nor +as

it ever free fro) one ain or another #he latter years in site of living in a +on'erful environ)ent, theblessings, an' .aster7s strength to carry )e through, ! still ha' to ta&e hot soa&ing baths in the)orning in or'er to be able to get this bo'y )oving

46



Beac 6oing

5or )any years there +ere only a fe+ boys living in the garage aart)ent at ncinitas .aster stillaointe' )e to be aasis bo'yguar' +hen he +ent 'o+n to the beach, an' gave )e instructions notto allo+ anyone else to go +ith aasi or to let hi) go to the beach alone "lso, ! +as to +al& at a

'istance behin' hi) an' sit on the beach +hile he s+a), in case he ha' trouble +hile in the ocean !coul' ren'er hel .aster a''e', 4His osition an' )oney +ill attract those +ho +ill +ant to aroachhi) for favors, etc, an' if so)eone is +ith hi) they +ont 'are4 .any years later, after .anuel ha'left our e)loy, .aster tol' )e a story that +as reorte' to hi) by one of the .e6ican boys that &ne+.anuel saying, 4.anuel ha' lanne' to have his o+n +ife aroach aasi on the beach #hey +eregoing to say that aasi ha' )a'e asses at her, then try to blac&)ail hi), but .anuel co)laine',4.iss Darling +as al+ays so)e+here on the beach an' +oul' have serve' as a +itness against usNtherefore, +e coul' not carry out our sche)e4 .aster a''e' +ith great satisfaction, 4-ee )y intuitionin trying to constantly rotect hi)4 #he other reason +as, aasi ha' acci'ent &ar)a, )y &ar)a being'ifferent than his +oul' hel to counteract it, this is also another reason .aster al+ays rovi'e' a'river for hi) Plus ! coul' carry his to+els an' solvent to re)ove the tar fro) his feet ! +oul' lace

these things +here he selecte', then ! +oul' go off an' fin' )yself a sot a goo' 'istance a+ay but +ithin sight

He al+ays +ent 'o+n our o+n stair+ay "t first, the stes 'i' not see) so stee or long to )e Winter or su))er +hen he +as at the her)itage, aasi +ent 'o+n to the beach every 'ay "s the 'aysan' years roile' by that stair+ay beca)e longer an' har'er to cli)b .y legs +oul' tre)ble so itsee)e' at ti)es ! coul' not )a&e it bac& u again ! foun' if ! starte' to say on the first stes, 4$)Coccy6,4 going u the sinal cor' at each ste until ! reache' the last one, or ! +oul' reeat 4$),4one ste +as for Babai, an' each ste reresente' one of the .asters #his is the only +ay ! coul')a&e it Ho+ )any ti)es in the course of those years, ! as&e' .aster to allo+ so)eone else toacco)any aasi to the beach, but he al+ays ans+ere' 4#here is no one else ! can trust but you4 !t

+asnt until after 19K; +hen )y bo'y +orsene' in health that .aster, to )y great oy, release' )e ofthis 'uty, for there +ere )ore boy 'isciles living at the colony an' ! coul' as& one of the) to go +ithhi) ! havent been to the beach since

Ra8asi1s Supplies& Sopping

elenishing aasis toilet articles an' foo' stuff 'oes not soun' li&e it +oul' be such a chore, but itturne' out that everything he use' +as a har' ite) to get or only articular stores carrie' the), etc,an' ! ha' to +al& )iles fro) one store to the other to fin' the), esecially 'uring the +ar +hen things

+ere so har' to get Believe )e +hen ! foun' the) ! bought a large suly

Not Accepting %one$

When ! first ca)e to .t Washington, aart fro) serving .aster ersonally, ! erfor)e' nu)erousservices to )any in'ivi'uals, an' it never occurre' to )e to accet re)uneration for service ren'ere'!n 193@, ! +as very frien'ly +ith a young coule +ho live' in the cottage at .t Washington 8#he A,no+ -elf=eali>ation 5ello+shi )on&s7 ?uarters -hortly after they )ove' a+ay, they both beca)e illat the sa)e ti)e #hey calle' to )e for hel ! +ent to hel the) until they +ere able to 'o forthe)selves When ! left, they ut a t+enty='ollar bill in )y oc&et ! i))e'iately gave it bac&, but theygave it again to )e saying they +oul' be hurt if ! 'i' not accet it, etc $ne si'e of )y )in' 'i' not

+ant to accet, but the other si'e 'i', thin&ing ! coul' buy a ne+ 'ress to go an' )eet .aster in -anDiego +ith -chra)) that +ee&en'N an' ! +al&e' a+ay +ith it When ! tol' .aster ho+ ! ha' gotten)y ne+ 'ress an' several other ite)s, +hat he sai' cure' )e for the rest of )y life of acceting

)oney %o )atter +hat ! thought or ho+ hurt they +oul' be, .aster very cal)ly sai', 4! +oul' havereferre' you +oul' have co)e to see )e in rags, rather than co)e in a ne+ 'ress at the cost ofacceting )oney for services you ren'ere' +hile you are in the service of (o'4 ! never +ore that

47



'ress again nor have ! ever accete' )oney again .aster sai' it +as alright to accet gifts, but )oney +as 'ifferent to accet, for it +oul' see) li&e +e +ere hiring ourselves out, but a gift +as a to&en ofareciation aasi &ne+ +e 'i' not receive a salary or )oney for ourselves, therefore he +ante' to 'o)e a &in'ness for )y services, so he +oul' sli so)e cash +here ! coul' fin' it "fter he ha' gone !7'fin' it, lace it in an enveloe, an' sen' it right to hi) in :ansas City He never reeate' this again,

but at Christ)as ti)e, .aster allo+e' hi) to give everyone in the house a bran' ne+ cris five='ollarbill !, therefore, +as inclu'e' +ith the rest .aster 'i' not +ant aasi to give to in'ivi'uals at anyother ti)e because .aster sai', 4#hey +oul' get use' to hi) giving to the) an' they in turn +oul'thin& of hi) as a )oney bag, instea' of the saint that he really is4 #his infor)ation ! ha' to carefullyass on to aasi +ithout offen'ing hi), for he +as very generous, an' li&e' to give to those on thesiritual ath .aster +ante' to instill in the )in's of all the 'evotees a 'ee, resectful attitu'eto+ar's aasi at all ti)es

Ser)ant

aasi ha' several servants in his :ansas City resi'ence When he first arrive' at the her)itage he +oul' so)eti)es forget hi)self an' sea& to )e as if he +as 'irecting one of his servants #hat +as

the ti)e +hen ! 'eely areciate' .asters +on'erful lesson an' +is'o), 4When a erson accets)oney one beco)es a slave to the giver4 Ho+ rou' ! +as +hen ! no+ coul' loo& s?uarely intoaasi7s eyes an' +ithout anger, be able to say, 4! a) your sister 'iscile not your servant,4 an' +ithoutanother +or' +ent to )y roo) He +oul' soon call to aologi>e ! i))e'iately 'is)isse' the inci'entfro) )y )in' an' resu)e' )y 'uties +here ! ha' left off aasi +as a erson of very strong +ill an''eter)ination, an' he use' that ability to correct +herever he sa+ or felt the slightest 'iscreancy inhi)self He &ne+ this +as one of the) an' ! only ha' to reeat the above but a fe+ ti)es 'uring allthe years of )y service to hi) ! ha' so )any occasions to use .aster7s +on'erful training in thisresect not only +ith aasi but +ith other offers as +ell #he last one +as after aasi left this)un'ane +orl' in 1900 #he e6ecutor of his estate sai' to )e, 4*ou +ere not )entione' in .r Aynn7s

+ill an' ! &no+ you erfor)e' the greatest of service to hi) before an' 'uring his illnesses, if you +ill

na)e any a)ount +ithin reason, it is +ithin )y o+er to grant you such "gain, ho+ grateful ! +as to.aster for his atience an' i'ealistic rinciles an' his trust in )e so that ! coul' sincerely an'truthfully ans+er, 4! 'e'icate' )yself to (o'7s service, an' )y services to .r Aynn +as only a art ofthat service to (o's cause ! coul' never accet ay)ent for that service4

!ust a /ousekeeper

#here +as another thing .aster al+ays &et reeating to )e in the )any years of )y service to aasi,4! 'on7t +ant you to be ust a house&eeer4 .aster very sel'o) e6laine' his )eanings to us Perhasit +as so +e coul' intuitively get its )eaning +ithout any out+ar' +or's, so by this training +e coul'also intuitively receive his gui'ance fro) his eternal ho)e after leaving this earthly lanet #hough !

never consi'ere' )yself as such, for ! felt ! +as 'oing +hat .aster +ante' of )e, hence, the )eaning'i' not occur to )e Ho+ever, after ! ha' returne' for )y secon' erio' of living at the her)itage in19K;, one 'ay ! +ent over to the large &itchen +here the young chil'ren 'isciles ate an' ha' theirliving ?uarters in the %orth en' of the her)itage When ! stee' into the 'oor of the &itchen, theybegan to as& )e siritual ?uestions "fter ! left the), ! +as hay to have been of service to the) Bythe ti)e ! reache' aasi7s &itchen +here he +as stan'ing, .aster7s )eaning of 4not being ust ahouse&eeer4 ca)e very forcefully to )y )in' With the oy of co)rehension ! clae' )y han'san' lou'ly ans+ere' )y o+n ?uestioning )in', 4so that is +hat .aster )eant by 7not being ust ahouse&eeer7 4 !t all ca)e very clearly to )y )in' no+ ! i))e'iately +ent right bac& to the chil'renan' tol' the) that ! +as going to ta&e the) in han' an' be resonsible for assing on to the) thebenefits of the +on'erful training .aster ha' so atiently given us, an' also ! for)ulate' a Praeceta

class for the a'ults of the colony every .on'ay night +here the chil'ren coul' also atten', an' then ! +rote .aster a note to that affect #he ne6t ti)e ! sa+ .aster, he oyfully sai', 4*ou are at last 'oing

48



the very thing ! have al+ays +ante' you to 'o, an' that you 'i' it on your o+n accor' leases )e)ost4 #hat .aster thought ! 'i' not +ant to 'o these things bothere' )e for so)eti)e, until one 'ay! tol' .aster ! +oul' li&e to clarify a fe+ oints +ith hi) regar'ing so)e of his )isun'erstan'ing ofso)e of )y )otives 4-ir, you sai' you +ere lease' that at last ! +as 'oing +hat you +ante' )e to 'o

+ith the chil'ren an' hol'ing )eetings every +ee&, etc Why 'i' you not tell )e you +ante' )e to 'o

so, there is nothing ! li&e better than to encourage an' tell all +hat you &in'ly gave us, but ! a) veryshy about ushing )yself regar'ing siritual things for ! 'ont feel +orthy of such, an' further ! hear'you critici>e one of the )en for having regular )eetings +ith the boys +ithout as&ing you first

#herefore, ! 'i' not thin& ! ha' the right to ush )yself for+ar'4 .aster ans+ere', 4#hat other )anha' another )otive, he +as trying to out='o aasi +ho +as )e'itating +ith the boys %ever co)areyourself +ith that erson, further you shoul' not have to be as&e', you have a right to 'o anythingsiritual +ithout as&ing or +aiting until ! as& you -hyness has no lace in the siritual +orl'4 !7ve &etu the )eetings every ossible +ee& ! +as resent at the her)itage $ne 'ay, years later, .astercritically as&e' )e, 4! suose you are not having your )eetings any)ore,4 to +hich ! hailyans+ere', 4*es -ir, every +ee& that ! a) there4 #his affir)ative ans+er lease' an' relieve' hi) forhe 'i' not +ant )e to sto but +as afrai' ! ha'N that is +hy he +as so relieve'

Secretarial 4uties

! also erfor)e' secretarial 'uties for aasi When no one else +ent to the Post $ffice, ! ha' to go When ! 'i' not 'rive, so)eti)es ! even ha' to +al& to get the )ail ! &et his 'es& an' aersstraightene' out "fter he +rote his notes ! a''resse' his enveloes, +eighe' an' sta)e' the) an'sa+ that they +ere )aile' the ne6t )orning early ! or'ere' his sta)s an' stationery sulies fro) his:ansas City office He )ostly +or&e' at night at his 'es& ! too& a shortcut course in shorthan', too&'ictation an' tye' letters for hi) for a+hile !n 19K;, +e learne' that .arorie Benau too&shorthan', he hire' her to ta&e 'ictation an' tye his letters for hi) When the Benaus left to+n,Brother -arolanan'a +ho +as a court shorthan' recor'er, too& the 'ictation on his )achineN thisho+ever 'i' not last long We then learne' that Bren'a Ae+is &ne+ shorthan' -he in turn +as hire'

until his assing #his +ay aasi7s business +as ta&en care of through letters an' by telehone to hisoffice

Laundr$

When aasi ca)e for a long erio', ! ha' to sen' his soile' clothes to his :ansas City resi'ence tohave the) laun'ere' an' they in turn sent the) bac& clean #his hele' )e a lot, for ! 'i' so)e)en'ing an' ironing, ! )a'e so)e of his things he li&e' to +ear at the her)itage an' +oul' not +earin :ansas City

6ardening

! ha' to train the ne+ boys +ho +ere selecte' to ic& his fruits an' vegetables an' +ho +oul' 'oersonal services for aasi "t first ! ha' to ic& the vegetables fro) the gar'en, +ash an' coo& the)ust before 'inner

Accounts on .penditures

aasi ai' for his o+n u&ee +hile he +as at the her)itage because he sai', 4! li&e goo' things an'they are e6ensive an' ! 'ont +ant to bur'en -5 +ith )y e6travagances4 He +as very generous an'gave )e lenty of cash to get his things +ith ! gave hi) an account of the e6en'itures He 'i' notli&e that, saying, 4*ou 'on7t nee' to give )e these accounts -ee, ! a) tearing the) +ithout evenloo&ing at the), an' if you ersist in 'oing so, ! +ill continue to tear the) -o, there is no use your

going through that trouble of &eeing an account for )e4 ! abi'e' by his +ishes, but ! +as e6tre)elycareful +ith his )oney, for ! &ne+ he +as -cottish in his +ays, but ! also &ne+ he li&e' goo' ?uality-o)eti)es if ! 'i' not have )y o+n urse along an' ! bought so)ething for )yself, ! al+ays

49



rei)burse' the househol' urse, there )y conscience +as al+ays clear of using or acceting )oneyfro) hi) 'irectly or in'irectly or fro) anyone else for that )atter .aster +as afrai' because !han'le' aasis )oney an' live' in the lu6urious her)itage that ! +oul' get lu6ury conscious Duringhis June 19K; -a)a'hi ecstasy, he +as tal&ing to Divine .other regar'ing )yself ! +rote it 'o+n an'! ?uote, 4! +as afrai' that lu6ury an' )oney +oul' )a&e you lu6ury conscious an' soil you, but !

no+ &no+ that lu6ury an' )oney +ill never soil you4

A Lesson on Unsel-isness

aasi +as so use' to getting the best of everything fro) everyone that +hen he first ca)e to ncinitashe +as incline' to give the secon' best to .aster !n+ar'ly ! felt .aster shoul' receive the best, an'ourselves secon' or +hat +as leftover #his act of aasi7s greatly 'isturbe' )e When ! +as betterac?uainte' +ith hi) ! coul' not say it in the +ay )y )in' 'ictate', for that +oul' have been toorough for hi) to ta&e, an' he +oul' act the oosite, so ! ha' to use a 'ifferent aroach When thefruit or vegetables ca)e in ! +oul' ic& out the largest of the best for .aster, sho+ing it to aasisaying, 4#his one .aster +oul' li&e,4 or, 4!n !n'ia the .aster al+ays gets the largest,4 or 4#he best ofeverything fro) the 'isciles an' receives a blessing for leasing the (uru !n this +ay ! bet you are

going to sen' this one to .aster4 #his +ay he receive' the hint, thereafter eager to lease .aster, he)a'e it a oint to be the first one to ic& out the best or largest an' rou'ly say to )e, 4#his one is for.aster,4 or 4Do you thin& .aster +oul' li&e this oneO4 or 4#hat one, or this one is the largest but it isnot the riest, so ! +ill sen' hi) one large one an' one that ! thin& is the s+eetest4 ! +oul' hailytell .aster ho+ aasi ic&e' the best for hi) Ho+ this lease' .aster to thin& that his little boythought of hi) first ! secretly ha' the satisfaction of above all, leasing .aster an' getting aasi asecial blessing

Using Reason Not .*otions 'it Ra8asi

$ne coul' easily reason +ith aasi an' get results #hough he +as a very successful business)an, he

+as very chil'li&e in his )anneris)s He 'eely love' his earthly )other, therefore he )ore rea'ilyreson'e' to )otherly aeals than to +o)anish e)otions .otherly raises for his goo' 'ee'sto+ar's the organi>ation an' to .aster an' others +oul' give hi) the incentive to continue to 'o)ore

Colds Cured

!f ! caught a col' ust before aasi +as sche'ule' to arrive, .aster +oul' i))e'iately cure it, so !coul' be on han' to 'o )y 'uties, but if ! ha' a col' +hen aasi +as not resent or not co)ing soon,)y col' +oul' linger for its sche'ule' ti)e

A Lesson in Negati)eness

! receive' strenuous training fro) .aster 'uring )y t+enty years of service to aasiN ! also receive'goo' training 'irectly fro) )y service to aasi ! ha' to be e6tre)ely careful of +hat an' ho+ or in

+hat )anner ! so&e about things to aasi, for negative thoughts or +or's +ere 'isastrous, to sea&the) to aasi, for he coul' not ta&e negativeness in any for)

Asking Ra8asi -or 4i--erent +ro8ect Support

!t fell to )y lot to interce'e bet+een .aster an' aasi +hen .aster +ante' fun's for 'ifferentroects ! &ne+ .aster7s si'e of the story, but ! also &ne+ aasi7s ! +oul' often fin' )yself tornbet+een as&ing for )oney ! &ne+ aasi coul' not give at that articular ti)e, an' )y 'ee 'esire to'o +hat .aster +ante' )e to as& for -o)eti)es ! felt that a articular roect +oul' not +or& out,

but still )y 'esire to lease .aster +oul' +in out an' !7' as& aasi for its suort 5ortunately, only afe+ of .aster7s roects faile', but at least ! ha' the satisfaction to &no+ that ! +as 'oing it for .aster

50



an' (o' an' &no+ing full +ell our Belove' .aster 'i' only for the +or& an' (o' When .aster +oul' as& )e to aroach aasi for the fun's for so)ething or other, he +oul' +ant )e to 'o it rightthere an' then, an' hurry bac& +ith the ans+er With .aster, everything ha' to be 'one in a hurry or?uic&ly He often tol' us, he 'i' not have ti)e to +ait aasi +as the oosite He 'elaye' an' +aite',for he thought he ha' years ahea' of hi) to 'o great things for -5 financially very ti)e .aster

blesse' hi) he al+ays sai', 4*ou +ill be blesse' +ith long life for 'oing so )uch for -5,4 but -atan'i' not li&e his 'oing so )uch for the salvation giving +or& of -5 an' trie' to sto hi) before his)ission ha' been acco)lishe', but through .asters an' (o'7s grace he 'i' finish an' +ent to his'eserve' re+ar'

.aster7s +anting the ?uic& ans+er )etho' ho+ever very sel'o) +or&e', for aasi +as a )an ofslo+ 'ecisions He ha' to thin& over ho+ he coul' )anage or ho+ he coul' get the fun's +ithouthar) to his business ! got so ! +oul' as& .aster if ! coul' 'o it in )y o+n ti)e an' +or's !e6laine' to .aster that ! foun' that if ! coul' tal& to aasi an' ic& the right ti)e ! ha' )oresuccess, for ! usually ic&e' a ti)e +hen he +as not hungry or the oortunity resente' itself in anaroaching conversation #his thought lease' .aster an', thereafter, he +oul' tell )e, 4"s& hi) inyour o+n +or's an' ti)e4 !f the least negative +or' unintentionally entere' in the conversation or if !

so)eti)es coul' not ?uic&ly catch an' turn the conversation to a ositive tren' the 'eal +as off ! ha'to sea& in a ositive nature about things an' ersons all the ti)e #his +ay ! )ostly every ti)ereceive' a ositive ans+er to .aster7s aeal through )eN then l oyfully reorte' to .aster

Ho+ +ell ! re)e)ber the 'ay aasi gave .aster the en'o+)ent for the her)itage .asterblesse' )e over an' over again for )y art in the )atter $ne Christ)as, .aster gave )e an

"ustralian oal ring as a re+ar' for ta&ing such goo' care of aasi

When .aster +ante' to co)e over to )e'itate +ith aasi ! ha' to go bac& an' forth to fin' outthe best ti)e for both $r before aasi +ent to the beach, because ! &ne+ .aster +ante' to go out,so .aster coul' co)e before aasi +ent to the beach

.pressions Used

aasi 'i' not li&e the e6ression of 4$h boy4 ! soon ha' to get out of that habit, for he +oul' tell )eho+ he 'i' not li&e it ! change' it to 4$h JoyF4 instea' #he sa)e +ith the +or' 4'a)4 #his +as anun)entionable +or' aroun' hi), that too ! ha' to cut out of )y vocabulary

! +oul' so often be lace' in the situation of being bet+een t+o fires so to sea&, that ! +oul' as&.aster if he +oul' aoint so)eone else to ta&e )y lace in serving aasi, but .aster +oul' al+ayshave the sa)e ans+er, 4What you 'o for hi), you are 'oing for )e there is no 'ifference, for ! a) inhi) as )uch as ! a) in )y o+n bo'y,4 or he +oul' say, 4! have )y reason for not aointing anyoneelse4 ! no+ &no+ all these reasons an' ! than& our Belove' .aster for utting so )uch trust in )e !?uote .aster7s notes to )e an' one to aasi

."* , 19K2 E Dear Du< ! &no+ you are +ell, ta&ing care of the )ost belove' ! an' big onefor )e *ou have ta&en a great resonsibility fro) )y o+n han's ! +oul' have ha' to seethat all his nee's are loo&e' after )yself

$C#$B , 19K2 E Du has been so goo', an' ! a) hay that her +or& for you isgenuinely 'one P*

#he fe+ years after the her)itage +as built aasi7s visits +ere fe+ an' far bet+een at ti)es, but asthe years roile' by, he ha' better )en to ta&e care of his business 'uring his absence, so he ca)e )oreoften an' for longer erio's "fter his al)ost fatal illness in 19K, he sent :ansas City7s three hottest

)onths an' the three col'est )onths at the her)itage "ll through those years, no )atter ho+i)ortant )y other +or& for -5 +as, ! ha' to 'ro it +hen aasi ca)e or +oul' 'o it in bet+een if

51



the ob +as at ncinitas #hen ! resu)e' )y 'uties +here ! ha' left off after he left for :ansas City

%aster1s 9;< +redictions

5ro) 193 to 19K;, ! serve' aasi alone +ith very little hel fro) othersN all the heavy as +ell as thes)all obs, until the 19K; Christ)as )e'itation at .t Washington .aster +as in sa)a'hi an' )a'e

several re'ictions about several ersons in the au'ience ! su''enly hear' )y na)e )entione',.aster +as saying, 4Du, Divine .other has greatly blesse' you to'ay, your +or& is 'one4 #hough !&ne+ +hat he )eant, after+ar's +hen ! +as alone +ith .aster ! as&e' hi) +hat he )eant by )y +or&being 'one He ans+ere', 4! )eant your heavy )anual labor, but you +ill have to continue to +or& ina 'ifferent +ay4 5ro) that ti)e on ! receive' hel for all the heavy +or& 5irst, ! ha' ugene Benau,

+ho +or&e' in the gar'en, to carry all loa's, ac& an' unac& the carN bring the vegetables u an' havethe) +ashe' .arorie, his +ife, cleane' the aart)ent an' 'i' his 'ictation, an' +hen they left to+n,there +ere other )en an' +o)en to 'o that +or& Brother -arolanan'a too& over bringing the

vegetables u an' 'i' the heavy +or& +ith Bha&tanan'a an' others %o )atter +here ! +ent, ! al+aysha' hel to 'o all these things for )e ! a) still reaing the benefit of this Divine blessing fro) .asteran' Divine .other to this 'ay

Ra8asi1s 0ood /a(its

aasi +as very strict in his eating habits, even to the oint of fanaticis) an' critical of others +ho 'i'not as strictly a'here to any articular goo' eating habit !f so)e one gave )e a iece of can'y, ie, orca&e, ! ate it in the sanctuary of )y roo) or the other en' of the her)itage to avoi' criticis) "llthrough the 'ay aasi ate as he felt hunger #he first things he ha' after his )orning e6ercisesN if hiscitrus fruits +ere in season, ! )a'e several large glasses of straine' graefruit uice, still later ! )a'ean' he 'ran& several glasses of orange uice $n other seasons, he ha' )elons ! +oul' cut )elonsuntil ! got a very s+eet one for hi) -till later, he 'ran& a glass of carrot uice, +hich ! )a'e freshevery 'ayN about t+o ?uarts at a ti)e He +oul' 'rin& another glass before retiring at night $r ! )a'e

a large glass of vegetable uice +ith ul )a'e in the blen'er +ith carrot uice or orange uice as a base,an' a s)all iece or a)ount of all the 'ifferent vegetables freshly ic&e' fro) the gar'en, a''e'al)on's or ecans $r he 'ran& goat )il& +ith honey, or ate fresh 'ates or +on'erful fresh )alesyrus, or +hey )a'e +ith ineale uice When the fruits +ere rie on the trees !7' eel the) an' hestoo' at the sin& an' ate a +hole )eal of eaches, figs, cheri)oyas or )angosN +hatever +as in seasonat the ti)e ! +oul' ta&e a slice of each fruit ! eele' to see if it +as s+eet for hi), if it +asnt ! +oul'eat it an' try again for a s+eeter one !f the fresh fruits +ere not in season, he ate unsulhure' raisons,figs, or 'ates +ith nuts When the corn +as in season ! scrae' the corn off the cob an' he ate iti))e'iately He also li&e' the) stea)e' on the cob He 'i' not li&e to buy nuts that +ere alrea'yshelle' e6cet those that +ere i)orte' an' coul' not be avoi'e', but 'o)estic nuts ha' to be freshan' in the shell ! ha' to crac& the) as he ate the) His only coo&e' )eal +as in the evening at no

secifie' ti)e, coo&e' +henever he +ante' it !t consiste' of a fe+ lainly coo&e' vegetables +ith verylittle salt or butter, he 'i' not li&e onions or garlic or sicy herbs

When ! ha' to leave .aster7s 'elicious sicy curries an' foo' to coo& for aasi, ! confor)e' tohis lain vegetable eating !t +as a contrast that too& )e several 'ays to a'ust to, for the foo' see)e'so unalatable "lthough aasi 'i' eat .aster7s curries an' enoye' the) +ith .aster7s blessings !really coo&e' so)eti)es t+o )eals, lain vegetables for aasi an' a ortion coo&e' aart +ith onionsan' sices for )yself aasi coul' naturally s)ell the sicy fragrance an' as&e' to taste it " s)allserving +as ti)i'ly lace' before hi)N the results of the sa)le taste usually en'e' by aasi eating allof )y tasty 'ish an' ! eating the lain tasteless vegetables, as&ing hi) the ne6t 'ay if he +ante'anything in articular coo&e', he +oul' ans+er, 4%o ust coo& it your o+n +ay4

He li&e' crisy foo's, esecially +ith lain coo&e' rice -ince he 'i' not 'rin& +ith his )eals, heli&e' gravies an' sauces, but they coul' not be thic&ene' +ith flour or cornstarch, but ! use' +aterchestnut flour bought at the Chinato+n stores He 'i' not eat brea' as a rule, but once in a+hile

52



he li&e' sour'ough brea' or corn tortillas or thin corn brea' +ith )elte' )il' cheese toaste' in theoven until bro+n or ust )elte' -o)eti)es he ha' a ra+ vegetable sala' +ith a ho)e )a'e 'ressing !)a'e He 'i' not li&e to tal& 'uring a )eal He che+e' his foo' so +ell it +oul' so)eti)es ta&e hi)fro) one an' a half to t+o hours to eat his )eal He never e6resse' +hether he li&e' the coo&e'foo's or not #he only +ay ! &ne+ he li&e' it +as +hen he as&e' for a secon' heling or left it on his

late if he 'i' not, or the ne6t 'ay he +oul' suggest, 4Don7t ut this or that in to'ay4 "fter )any trialsan' errors, ! learne' his li&es an' 'isli&es

! 'are say that eating such healthful foo's 'i' hel )y bo'y, )in', an' siritual training, fornatural an' ure foo's 'o hel one7s thin&ing o+er ! a) grateful for those 'ays of natural eating, an'to aasi for gro+ing the), the vegetables an' fruits, an' rovi'ing the fun's that ! too, +ith hi),enoye' such bounty of goo' an' high ?uality foo's, for this shell to continue her service to .aster,(o', an' the +or& of -5

%aster1s Lo)e -or Ra8asi

! receive' )y greatest re+ar's +hen .aster ca)e in to visit aasi ! got in on )any +on'erfully

siritual 'iscussions an' receive' .asters blessings, lus the oys of seeing the greatest love e6resse'bet+een a Christ=li&e soul an' that of a saint -uch love they ha' for each other #he +orl' has neverseen such love fro) .asters eyes +hen he loo&e' at his 4Aittle $ne4 !t coul' outshine even a)other7s ten'er love for her ne+born babe, for this love +as uncon'itional an' ca)e 'irectly fro) theDivine

%aster Said I Su--er -or Oters1 Kar*a

.aster has also sai' that aasi +oul' suffer for the &ar)a of others because he +as 'oing so )uch tosrea' the +or& in his o+n unarallele' +ay .aster has also tol' )e that ! too ta&e on the &ar)a ofothers !n 190@, +hen ! +as u at .t Washington, ! tol' .aster, 4! 'on7t un'erstan', -ir, for a longti)e !7ve been 'rea)ing that ! a) cleaning so)ebo'y elses house, roo) or that ! a) 'oing this or that

for so)ebo'y4 .aster ans+ere', 4(oo', goo', goo', that )eans that you are at least helingso)ebo'y else4 Just before his .ahasa)a'hi ! +as tal&ing +ith .aster over the telehone an' !as&e', 4-ir, you tol' )e that those 'rea)s ! have about heling othersN 'oes that )ean that ! +ill besuffering through )y bo'y to hel the)O4 He ans+ere', 4*es4 ! &no+ to +hat 'egree an' ho+ )uch! ta&e on of others7 suffering, but ! also &no+ +hen the suffering is )y o+n

%aster Tells %e o- Ra8asi1s 4anger

ven as early as the su))er of 1901, .aster often tol' )e that aasi7s life +as in grave 'anger an'that -atan +as trying to 'estroy his bo'y When ! as&e' .aster +hy -atan +ante' to 'estroy aasisbo'y he ans+ere', 4Because he has an' is still 'oing so )uch for the +or& an' is heling a lot of souls

bac& to (o' as His Divine instru)ent an' -atan is trying to 'estroy it so he +on7t 'o any)ore4 aasicoul' not go to .aster7s last birth'ay arty at .t Washington in 1901 He 'i' not have a col', an'there +as no sign of any 'isease or ain or anything +rong +ith hi) His face +as al+ays so ru''y an'healthful, but this ti)e he loo&e' ale

%aster Tells %e o- /is Ar8una Incarnation

January , 1901, after .aster7s birth'ay, because aasi +as not +ell, .aster ca)e to the her)itage tosee hi) .aster arrive' the night before, but because it +as so late he tol' )e not to tell aasi that he

+as there, that he +oul' see hi) the ne6t )orning

#he ne6t )orning .aster calle' )e to his ?uarters to as& +here aasi +as, saying 4Don7t tell hi),! +ant to surrise hi)4 aasi +as sitting on his lounge chair in his living roo) loo&ing out of theoen 'oor .aster stoo' at aasi7s 'oor loo&ing at hi), aasi sense' so)eone at the 'oor, loo&e'aroun', u)e' fro) his chair, an' ut his ar)s aroun' .aster an' they e)brace' for a long ti)e

53



aasi le' .aster to the chair he +as sitting on an' )a'e .aster sit in it, they tal&e' for a long ti)ehol'ing han's aasi ha' to leave the roo) for a little +hile !n that recious ti)e, .aster as&e' )e,4Who 'o you thin& ! +as in the 'istant ast, +ho coul' have better +ritten the (ita in this lifeO4-everal years before ! ha' as&e' .aster if he +as "runa, but he 'i' not ans+er for he +as not rea'y to'ivulge his secret yet By the +ay, .aster as&e' the ?uestion, ! ans+ere', 4yasa, the +riter of the

(ita4 .aster sai', 4%o, but ! re)e)ber you ha' as&e' )e years ago if ! +as "runa,4 then ! oyfullye6clai)e', 4*ou +ere "runa,4 he s)ile' his, 4*es4 ! then as&e' hi) if aasi +as +ith hi) at thatti)e He ans+ere', 4*es, he +as one of the t+ins, the ositive one, %a&ula He +as )y favoritebrother an' ! love' hi) )ore than ! love' anyone else ! +as also his (uru then too :rishna +as )yguru an' Babai, being :rishna, is still )y guru, -ri *u&tes+ari +as )y guru by ro6y for Babai4

#hen ! as&e' hi) if ! +as also +ith hi) at that ti)e, he loo&e' at )e an' sai', 4-ure, you +ere4 !as&e' hi) if ! +as a )an or a +o)an, he ans+ere', 4*ou +ere a +o)an, you have been a +o)an for along ti)e an' you +ill continue to be, a long ti)e to co)e4 ! then as&e' +ho ! +as, he ans+ere', 4!'ont have to tell you everything4 ! ust sai', 4! suose ! +as one of the )others +ho +ent aroun'loo&ing for her love' one +ho ha' fallen on the battlefiel'4 .aster s)ile' an' then aasi ca)e bac&into the roo) .aster left very shortly after that for #+enty=%ine Pal)s

%aster Tells %e o- /is "orries

aasi ha' to return to :ansas City 'uring the )onth of January 1902 When ! too& hi) to the airort,! re)aine' at .t Washington for several 'ays .aster +as there an' he an' ! ha' a long tal& Hereeate' his 'ee +orries for the +or& an' aasi7s health an' reeate' his fears of -atan trying to'estroy aasi7s bo'y .aster sai', 4He al+ays 'elays an' 'elays for he thin&s he has lots of ti)e yet to'o things for -5, but he 'oes not have, -atan is trying to 'estroy his bo'y4 #ears rolling 'o+n hissacre' chee&s He a''e', 4! +oul'n7t be able to live on earth +ithout hi), ! +ill leave this bo'yconsciously if he goes first4 Who coul' see that belove' soul cry +ithout oining hi), he 'rie' histears an' began telling )e 4.y 'ays, yes, even the hours of )y life are nu)bere' Du, ! can no longer)a&e aeals to hi), Du +rite to hi), ho+ he +as born only to en'o+ this +or& +ith a )illion or

)ore 'ollars, that this +or& )ay go on after +e both 'eart fro) this earth 5or that sa)e reason, he'i' not have chil'ren of his o+n that this +or& an' all )ay be his chil'ren #ell hi) ho+ this +or&

+oul' beco)e an orhan if he an' ! +oul' both be gone, for all three of our livesN his, yours an' )ineare e?ually in the sa)e 'anger !f he +oul' )a&e this +or& secure its continuance after +e leave,erchance it )ay e6ten' our lives for a longer erio' of ti)e4 .y heart +as as heavy as lea' )y )in'absorbe' in his every +or' an' enetrate' to the very core of )y soul #his, ho+ever, unbe&no+nst tous, +as only the beginning of a series of sorro+ for us ! ro)ise' .aster ! coul' +rite to aasi thesee6acts +or's, ust as soon as ! got bac& to ncinitas, an' long enough ti)e to let aasi have a chanceto assi)ilate its contents before he returne' in 5ebruary

.aster reeate'ly sai', 4! a) so +orrie' about his health, Du, ta&e goo' care of hi)4 #hat +as

the last ti)e ! sa+ )y s+eet Belove' .aster alive, +hen he left for #+enty=%ine Pal)s! ca)e bac& to the her)itage to get the house rea'y for aasi7s arrival ! +rote that aealing

letter an' )aile' it so he +oul' have it a +ee& before his arrival at ncinitas aasi ca)e a +ee&before he left for -an 5rancisco to one of his co)anies conventions for their 20th "nniversary on5ebruary 2@, 1902 aasi 'i' not )ention a +or' about the letter, but then that +as no surrise for henever 'i' say anything, but acte' instea'

%$ Talk 'it %aster in %arc& 9=2

When .aster ca)e bac& to .t Washington early in .arch in rearation to receive the !n'ian ")bassa'or, .aster calle' to give )e instructions to have the Ae+ises co)e to .t Washington at a

certain ti)e, to be +ith hi) +hen he +elco)e' the ")bassa'or an' a''e', 4Why 'ont you co)e,tooO4 ! ans+ere', 4*es, -ir ! +ill co)e if you +ant )e to be there4 He ans+ere', 4%o, you better staythere an' ta&e goo' care of hi)4 !n that sa)e conversation, ! tol' hi) ! ha' +ritten that letter to

54



fro) its rootsO "fter e6ressing )y out+ar' sorro+ ! sit at his be' besi'e his hea' an' +as atting his'ivine silent chec&, +hen a serene eace ca)e over )e li&e a blan&et of co)fort ach one in the roo)at that ti)e tol' )e they too all ha' felt that sa)e eace !t +as then that ! coul' areciate an' seethe blissful s)ile he ha' on his sacre' face, his little u'gy han's an' feet +ere still soft an' liableven then, aasi 'i' not she' a tear -o)e eole are li&e that, tears cant co)e at a ti)e +hen it

+oul' be a relief to she', but su''enly it gives vent

Tr$ing to Bring %aster Back

%one of the 'ose 'isciles +ante' .aster ta&en a+ay by 5orest Aa+n ust yet We +ante' to )a&e onelast atte)t to assure ourselves that he +as not only in sa)a'hi We 'eci'e' for each one of us toreeat the )antra .aster ha' taught us, in case he +ent into a 'ee sa)a'hi to bring hi) bac& intoouter consciousness ! +as first, after reeating the )antra a fe+ ti)es ! hear' .asters voice say, 4Why'o you +ant )e to co)e bac& into this ol' carcassO4 ! )entally ans+ere', 4Because +e are selfish, -ir,4he again a''e', 4Aeave it to Du to tell the truth4 But the full conviction ca)e that he +as not goingto return to us, an' each one felt the sa)e as ! 'i' ! 'on7t &no+ if they hear' .aster7s voice, but ! 'o&no+ that aasi tol' us +hat .aster ha' tol' hi), 4! a) $), everything is $), ! +ill co)e bac& into

your bo'y an' in the consciousness of everybo'y4 -ince +e all +ere sure, +e let 5orest Aa+n )enta&e hi) in rearation for the services in our chael

aasi +ante' to return to ncinitas for the fe+ 'ays that .aster +as going to be a+ay fro) .t Washington We returne' for the services During the services aasi sai' later, 4! coul' not sea&, the +or's +oul' not co)e out, an' ! raye' to .aster saying, 7*ou +ill have to sea& through )e, ! cantutter the +or's74 !))e'iately aasi7s voice rang out +ith such force everyone notice' it, +e &ne+that .aster +as sea&ing through aasi, for his voice +as naturally soft an' lo+, very unli&e the onethat ha' ust so&en to all

What +or's are there to e6ress our feeling at our last gli)se of that Divine face +e love' so'eelyO "fter all +as over the only consolation +e ha' +as +hat .aster ha' often tol' us, 4! +ill go

ahea' to reare a better lace for you all, +here +e +ill )eet again in greater glory4

0irst Signs o- Ra8asi1s Illness

"fter the services +e returne' to ncinitas, aasi reste' for a fe+ 'ays $ne evening he +or&e' onso)e -5 reorts for t+o hours "fter he +ent to be' there +as a long 'istance call for hi) ! calle'hi) to the hone but he coul' not un'erstan' +hat the erson +as telling hi) 5inally, .r Wie'er in:ansas City sai', 4! +ill call you in the )orning,4 he thought they ha' a ba' telehone connection !cant tell you the heavy feeling ! e6erience' fro) aasi7s action over the hone, it +as li&e a 'ar&)isgiving clou' hovering over )y hea' an' throughout the +hole her)itage #he ne6t )orning hesee)e' so )uch 'ifferent that ! thought erhas ! ust i)agine' the heaviness, or it )ay have been )y

sorro+ over .aster7s leaving usaasi +ent bac& to :ansas City in .ay, an' ca)e bac& in July to atten' our Convocation, again in

his seech at the ti)e gar'en arty he coul' not sea& an' ha' to e6cuse hi)self ! thought that he +as too overco)e by .asters assing an' his )antle on hi) "fter +e got bac& to the her)itage, hebegan to increasingly get +orse ! coul' not un'erstan' ho+ he +as getting +orse, for he ha' no ain,but his right han' coul' not hol' things, he +oul' 'ro the) ! ha' to fee' hi), an' one )orning heas&e' )e to co)e an' see if ! coul' sto the blee'ing on his ear, he ha' cut it +hile shaving !t too&)e a long ti)e to sto it, of course later ! un'erstoo' +hy, because of the ressure of the tu)or +asressing the bloo' to the oen +oun' "fter that inci'ent, ! +as afrai' he +oul' severely cut hi)self !shave' hi) +ith a safety ra>or every 'ay, until he +ent to the hosital

! consulte' Dr Ae+is about his con'ition, he a'vise' )e to call Dr %ovae #his 'octor tal&e' +ith aasi He thought erhas it +as a s)all stro&e an' he soon +oul' get over it an' sai' he +oul'co)e bac& in a fe+ 'ays ! ha' rea' that so)eti)es saints +ho coul' not hol' )etal, etc, +hen they

56



+ere in a high state of consciousness an' thought since .aster ha' sai' he +oul' ut his siritual)antle on aasi this +as the reason for all this When Dr %ovae returne' he sa+ that he +as getting

+orse, an' as&e' if he coul' bring a frien' of his +ho +as a secialist in this fiel', +ho +as co)ing tosen' a fe+ 'ays +ith hi) at this house in ancho -anta 5e He +oul' bring hi) in aroun' 1@ a)the ne6t )orning aasi consente', an' the re)ain'er of that 'ay ! coul' see that aasis +hole right

si'e +as getting rogressively +orse #hat night ! 'i' not 'are let hi) alone, ! sit u all night outsi'ehis be'roo) oen 'oor in case he fell an' nee'e' )e ! coul' har'ly +ait until the ne6t )orning forthe 'octor to co)e, for ! ha' to hel aasi to the 'oor of his bathroo) several ti)es 'uring the nightan' ! coul' see each ti)e he +as +orse ! felt such a 'ee arehension +ithout even &no+ing +hat

+as the )atter +ith hi) During the 'ay, ! ha' intuitively reare' an overnight bag for aasi an')yself in case +e ha' to leave su''enly for the hosital

Ra8asi 6oes to te /ospital -or te 0irst Ti*e

"fter Dr aney e6a)ine' hi) on "ugust 13, 1902, he tol' )e it +as a brain tu)or an' it +asrogressing every fast an' the sooner +e got hi) to the hosital the better, an' that they )ay evenhave to oerate that sa)e evening if his brother 'ee)e' it necessary, it )ay be a )atter of hours of his

life ! calle' the Ae+ises an' tol' the)N they offere' to 'rive us to Aos "ngeles to the (oo' -a)aritanHosital Auc&ily ! ha' listene' to )y intuition an' ha' everything rea'y to go because hearing that'rea'ful ne+s )y thin&ing ability +as 'ulle' an' the heaviness returne' a thousan' fol' "fter the'octors left, ! +ent to see aasi, the e6ression on his oor, sa' face )a'e )e turn a+ay for fear ofbursting into tears before hi), at a ti)e he nee'e' encourage)ent )ost Controlling )y e)otions, !

+ent in to hel hi) get rea'y to leave i))e'iately after lunch for Aos "ngeles #his +as the secon'greatest shoc& of our lives, an' ust five )onths after losing our Belove' .aster *ou can +ell i)agineour state of )in'

aasi +ent through a series of e6a)inations to locate the tu)or that sa)e evening an' the ne6t)orning, ugene Aynn, aasi7s favorite nehe+, one of +ho) he thought of as a son, an' .r

Challinor his right han' )an in his co)anies ca)e the ne6t )orning Challinor 'i' not +ant the) tooerate until they ha' several secialists, an' aasis life +as )ore an' )ore on the verge of 'eath,until they finally ha' to oerate We ha' the assurance that the aney brothers +ere tos in thiscountry

Dr an' .rs Ae+is ha' to ta&e the train bac& to ncinitas after leaving us off at the hosital "tthe station, he )et his 'octor fro) -an Diego an' Dr Ae+is as&e' hi) if he &ne+ Dr aney #his'octor tol' hi) that they are the best in this country Dr Ae+is +as so relieve' he calle' )e fro) thestation to tell )e this reassuring ne+sN fro) the station to aasis hosital roo)

aasi +as oerate' on "ugust 1K, 1902, bet+een 3<3@ an' <3@ ) aasi7s life +as sare'through .aster7s grace an' self=sacrifice ! staye' in his rivate roo) all 'ay an' every 'ay until late

evenings, for the nurses 'i' not &no+ his cleaning an' eating habits, his li&es an' 'isli&es, an' ! coul' +atch over hi) +hile the nurses +ent on their lunch or other 'uties

He ha' three rivate nurses for three 'ifferent shifts ! too& care of his flo+ers, the nurses aresuose' to 'o this but they +ere neglectful )ost of the ti)e an' he 'i' not li&e the o'or fro) ol'flo+ers ! )a'e fresh carrot an' other uices at .t Washington +here ! staye' for the 'uration, an'too& it to hi) every 'ay, or brought hi) the fresh fruits fro) ncinitas, etc #hey +oul' not allo+anyone to co)e an' see hi) for a long ti)e, only )yself, his nehe+, an' Challinor #his is +here !got ac?uainte' +ith ugene Aynn He love' aasi as his father He stoo' si'e by si'e +ith )e in allthese or'eals an' +e crie', tal&e', an' laughe' together We 'eveloe' a 'ee frien'shi in our )utualan6iety He is such a goo' boy, he is all heart an' not afrai' to she' tears He tol' )e one 'ay the firstfe+ 'ays of our trial, 4.iss Darling, this is not to flatter you, but ! can7t tell you ho+ )uch ! areciate

all you are 'oing for ncle Ji))y 'uring this or'eal, ho+ fortunate he is to have such a goo' ersonli&e you to loo& after hi)4 "ll ! coul' say +as that it +as a rivilege to serve such a saintly soul

57



very 'ay aasi ha' so)e ne+ visions to tell )e about, +hich )a'e )y 'ays at the hosital +orth+hile outsi'e of )y service to a saint He often sai', 4*ou 'on7t ho+ )uch .aster is a+are ofyou all,4 or 4.aster is )ore +ith you all than he ever +as,4 +hich &et us encourage' an' brought.aster closer to our hysical )in's Believe )e ! +as hay +hen he +as 'ischarge' fro) the hositalafter a )onths stay #he Ae+is7 ca)e to 'rive us bac& to the her)itage

>?Ra$ Treat*ents

#he t+o aney7s a'vise' a series of 6=rays treat)ents for aasi, they ic&e' a goo' 'octor in Aa Jolla,so he +oul' not have so far to go, an' after a +ee&7s rest, he starte' the treat)ents ! 'rove hi) five'ays a +ee& for three )onths 8also rea' aasis biograhy for other 'etails

"fter .aster7s .ahasa)a'hi an' aasis first attac&, aasi rente' a house in Borrego an' sentuntil .ay there %o+ at each +ee&en' after his 6=rays +e 'rove 'irectly to Borrego, he love' so +ell

.ncinitas Apart*ent 0ire

!n %ove)ber, +e +ent to his usual 5ri'ay afternoon treat)ent an' +ent to Borrego 'irectly fro) the

'octor7s office #he follo+ing afternoon the Ae+ises une6ecte'ly 'rove u the 'rive+ay to the house! +as surrise' to see the), but thought they ha' co)e for a visit, but they +ere bearers of ba' ne+s,they tol' )e first that there ha' been a fire in aasis aart)ent be'roo) ! ha' left the electricblan&et on fro) #hurs'ay night, but ! ha' +i'ely srea' it over a chair in the co)er of his roo)5ri'ay afternoon after +e left, *oshio Ha)a'a +ent over to clean the aart)ent, too& the srea'blan&et an' bun'le' it on the chair to vacuu) un'er the chair !t +as alrea'y very hot, an' +ithout theair circulating it caught fire 'uring the early )orning %ina +ho live' in the north en' of the her)itagegot u very early an' ha' to go to the office to ut out the hall lights -he hear' a constant bell ringingan' beca)e alar)e' an' calle' Dr Ae+is, +ho ca)e right over an' +ith great 'ifficulty ut the fireout +ith the e6tinguisher

-)o&e 'i' )ost of the 'a)age ! ha' an electric ush button installe' fro) aasis be'roo) to abu>>er in the hall, in case he nee'e' )e an' coul' not get to the interco) hone, +hich +as on the'resser a+ay fro) his be' #he +ires +ere in the floor belo+ +here the fire stare' When the firetouche' the +ires it set the bu>>er off, this is +hat caught %ina7s attention, lus Dr Ae+is7 ?uic&action save' the +hole her)itage fro) co)letely going u in fla)es .il're' Ae+is a'vise' us tore)ain at Borrego for the aart)ent +as in a sa' state -he, Doctor, an' .r -lavos an' another )anha' ta&en the +hole aart)ent aart, re)ove' the rugs an' furniture to clean, etc, even )y roo)belo+ +as 'a)age' ! thought +e coul' stay in the north en' of the her)itage, but aasi +oul' nothave it ! ha' to 'rive five 'ays a +ee& to Aa Jolla fro) Borrego ! )ust say ! +as hay +hen the

+ee&en' ca)e an' ! 'i' not have to 'rive t+o hun're' )iles every 'ay

We returne' to Borrego the 'ay after Christ)as 8see Christ)as file for )ore 'etails, an'

re)aine' until the aart)ent +as rebuilt an furnishe' .rs Ae+is, bless her heart, +as so &in', she)anage' everything for )e, an' 'i' all the 'irty +or& of )oving, cleaning, an' having everything sentto the cleaners, for every stitch ha' to be cleane' to get the s)o&e out What a terrific ob she ha', thefire insurance fro) aasis Co)any ai' for the bills ! re)e)ber aasi telling .rs Ae+is an'Doctor, 4! +ant the best in Durga7s roo), she ha' such a terrible roo) an' at last ! can 'o so)ethingfor her for all she has 'one for )e all these years4 We 'i' not co)e bac& until .il're' tol' us toco)e, +hen all +as finishe' an' everything +as bac& in lace (osh, +hat a 'elightful surrise, an' !'i' not have to 'o any +or&, e6cet one afternoon +ith .rs Ae+is at the furniture store, selecting thefurniture an' 'raes, etc, for both his aart)ent an' )ine !t +as in'ee' a oy to live in

When the +or&ers too& the +all 'o+n, they foun' a large hole +here the +ater an' 'a)nesscoul' co)e in %o +on'er )y roo) +as al+ays so 'a), )y bones al+ays ache' an' ! ha' to ta&esoa&ing baths to be able to )ove the first thing in the )ornings " ne+ +oo'en floor instea' ofce)ent, ne+ caret an' stairs, )irrore' +all, built=in 'ressers, altar, etc What a 'ifference fro) the ol'

58



one Ho+ rou' aasi +as to ta&e )e in saying 4%o+ ! a) satisfie' that at last you have a 'ecentroo) to live in4 He blesse' .rs Ae+is, Doctor an' Bren'a an' ! We +ere all very hay +ith theresults of a little fire, +hich 'i' not a)ount to )uch Water an' s)o&e ha' 'one )ost of the 'a)ageaasi +as very hay +ith his ne+ aart)ent, too aasis last 6=ray treat)ent +as on Dece)ber 2K,1902, that is the reason +e +ere not at .t Washington that Christ)as

Our 9=3 Trip

$n .ay 31, 1903, aasi +ent bac& to :ansas City for the first ti)e after his $eration ugene Aynnacco)anie' hi) on these tris aasi ca)e bac& the latter art of June an' he sent the su))er)onths at ncinitas During this su))er, aasi tol' )e +hat .aster ha' sai' to hi), 4+hy 'on7t yougive )y fa)ily a nice triO4 aasi tol' )e +ho +as to go, the ones +ho ha' serve' .aster )ostfaithfully ! calle' the girls to co)e to ncinitas that ! ha' a surrise for the) When aasi reeate'

+hat .aster ha' tol' hi), Daya, .atai, .rinalini an' )yself, that the four of us +ere going on a long'riving tri +herever +e +ante' to go #hey all shoute' +ith oy ! &ne+ that aasi +as going bac& to:ansas City on -ete)ber 1@, 1903 ! arrange' so the girls +oul' )eet )e in :ansas City for ! ha' tofly bac& +ith aasi, because ugene coul' not leave the office to co)e an' get hi) aasi +as

caable of going by hi)self, but it +as ugene an' ! +ho +ishe' so)eone to go +ith hi)

#he girls starte' 'riving earlier #hey )et )e at :ansas City airort an' ugene )et aasi We allstaye' at a hotel aasi too& us to see his resi'ence +hen 5rie'a +as absent on one of her 'rives Wesa+ the house +here our blesse' saint live', his orchar', an' +ent to his office several ti)es We left:ansas City loa'e' +ith aasi7s +on'erful 'elicious ales fro) his orchar', to eat on the rest of ourtri to+ar's the eastern cities

! ha' tol' the girls to )a out the route they +ante' to see We 'rove 'o+n south to %e+$rleans We visite' aasis t+o sisters in "rchibal', Aouisiana, then to+ar's the eastern coast, %e+

*or& We 'rove as far as %iagara 5alls an' bac& through Cana'a an' Detroit, thence bac& to :ansasCity an' ho)e in ti)e to get aasis house rea'y for his return on %ove)ber 1st !t +as a +on'erful

1@,@@@=)ile tri, esecially because .aster ha' lanne' it for us an' his blessing follo+e' usthroughout the ourney

Ra8asi Tells o- 6i)ing %illions to SR0

aasi an' ! sent the Christ)as holi'ays at .t Washington that year !t +as also 'uring this su))erofl903 +hen ugene Aynn visite' his uncle on business #hey +ere +al&ing on the la+n tal&ing, ! +asin Daya7s be'roo) tal&ing to .atai an' her We +ere stan'ing at the +in'o+ loo&ing at the) assingby aasi sa+ us, they both ca)e over to the +in'o+, aasi tol' us, 4! )a'e arrange)ents for -5 tobe the beneficiaries of )y life insurance of half a )illion By the ti)e ! a) through 'oing things for-5, it +ill have fro) three to four, yes even si6 )illion 'ollars in assets to its cre'it, that shoul' lease

.aster4 %ee'less to say ho+ rofuse +e +ere in our areciation an' than&s +ith our 4$h4 an'4"hs4 fro) us allN to aasi7s leasure

%en -ro* India ,isit Ra8asi

! thin& it +as in .arch, 190K, that aasi )et the )en fro) !n'ia, Pro&has Das, no+ "t)anan'ai, an'Prabhas (hosh for the first ti)e He +as stan'ing at the to of the her)itage front stairs He ha' hisorange robe on, ho+ touching that )eeting +as He ut his ar)s aroun' both )en an' all three crie'li&e chil'ren thin&ing of our Belove' .aster aasi sit on the living roo) settee Both )en sit on thefloor atting aasi7s legs, loo&ing at hi) +ith such a'oring an' resectful eyes #hey re)aine' for afe+ 'ays at the her)itage #he )en gave aasi his gifts they bought fro) !n'ia for hi) an' ! gotseveral things fro) the) also We too& ictures of all three

59



At*ananda8i1s ,o's

aasi gave "t)anan'ai his -+a)i vo+s as .aster7s reresentative because .aster ha' alrea'y )a'e "t)anan'ai a -+a)i, but he +ante' to get .aster7s blessings through aasi in .aster7s be'roo) !notice' that night before co)ing to .aster7s roo), aasi 'i' not loo& +ell He even +ent right by the'oor, but he +ent on +ith the cere)ony any+ay "gain ! felt a stab in the heart, but he +as better the

ne6t 'ay " fe+ 'ays later the )en left to go on their (ran' Canyon tri because aasi ha' tol' the)that he +as lanning on going bac& to :ansas City for a little +hile an' that they +oul' have ti)e togo an' co)e bac& before he +oul' co)e bac& aasi left on "ril 1;, 190K ! staye' at .t

Washington until the 23r' ! +as getting rea'y to leave the ne6t )orning #he night before ! receive' along 'istance call fro) ugene Aynn telling )e that he +as bringing aasi bac& an' to )eet the)both at the airort that night, an' that +e +oul' have to 'rive aasi 'irectly to the hosital, that he

+as feeling the sa)e sy)to)s of the tu)or returning He ha' calle' Dr aney an' they a'vise' hi)to co)e i))e'iately to Aos "ngeles "fter ! ha' ut 'o+n the hone ! tol' -ra''ha, +ho +as in the&itchen at that ti)e, 4! &no+ aasi is co)ing bac& to go through another or'eal, but so)eho+ ! feel agreat loa' has been lifte' fro) )y )in'4 ! 'i' not &no+ +hy but ! foun' out after aasi arrive' atthe hosital ! too& -ra''ha +ith )e to the airort for ! 'i' not +ant to co)e bac& alone after leaving

aasi off While ugene +as )a&ing arrange)ents an' loo&ing for the 'octor, the three of us +eresitting in the car, aasi in front of )e He loo&e' at )e an' as&e' )e, 4Don7t you &no+ +hat ! 'i'O4 !ans+ere' that ! 'i' not &no+ He rou'ly sai', 4-5 +ill get L,@@@ a year inco)e fro) the'ivi'en's ! have signe' over 22,@@@ shares of :ansas City -outhern ailroa' stoc& in -57s na)e, thisis +orth a )illion 'ollars4 We both e6clai)e' +ith great oyF We coul' say no )ore for ugenereturne' to the car to ta&e aasi in He +al&e' in, signe' his o+n a')ittance car', an' +al&e' into theroo) an' reare' for be', for it +as very late #hen ! &ne+ the reason a loa' ha' been lifte' fro))y )in'N for so )any years .aster +ante' aasi to en'o+ the +or& +ith a )illion or )ore 'ollars

I Intercede -or SR0

!ve al+ays +or&e' si'e by si'e +ith .aster an' interce'e' for hi) regar'ing fun's for the +or& "fter.aster7s .ahasa)a'hi, ! starte' tying .aster7s letters to aasi He has over seven hun're' of the),'uring the t+enty years of .aster7s correson'ing +ith aasi, regar'ing the +or&, etc Whenever !foun' so)e an' there +ere )any beautiful assages, .aster articularly e6resse' 'ee love for aasi,! rea' the) to hi) $nce, after ! finishe' the assage, he crie', saying, 4! 'i' not &no+ he love' )e so)uch4 "lso, in one of those +on'erful letters ! rea' one $f .asters aeals an' at the en' of theletter he sai', 4!f ! 'on7t aeal to you there +ill be no one to 'o it after ! a) gone4 .y heart an')in' ans+ere' .aster, 4%ever )in' Aittle -ir, ! +ill carry on for you in these aeals,4 an' ! 'i' atevery oortunity ! ha' During the +inter, ! even +rote aasi a letter re)in'ing hi) of his 'uties of)a&ing this +or& secure !t +as a tye+ritten letter not too long, but to the oint ! thought ! coul'

+rite it better an' rea' it to hi), for if ! tal&e' he +oul' ust say, 4%ot no+, after ! a) better4 !

+ante' to ut )y oint over, so ! as&e' hi) to rea' a letter ! +rote to hi) ! sit behin' hi) so ! +oul'not have to see his face, for if ! sa+ his hurt e6ressions, ! coul' not go on "fter ! finishe' rea'ing theletter, he calle' )e to his si'e ! &nelt besi'e hi) He blesse' )e +ith tears in his eyes, saying, 4! &no+! have not co)lete' )y )ission yet, but ust as soon as ! a) better, ! +ill ta&e care of everything4

#he fulfill)ent of this 'uty +as the +eight +hich +as lifte' fro) both aasi an' )y )in', for he ha'co)lete' the urose for +hich he +as born in this life, an' ! to hel .aster to acco)lish this)ission +ith aasi, the very thing .aster +ante', that the +or& +oul' continue to rogress after boththeir bo'ies ha' )elte' into the !nfinite

Ra8asi1s Second Operation

aasi7s secon' $eration +as on "ril 2, 190K While +e +ere +aiting for the )en to co)e to ta&e

hi) to the oerating roo), he +as very cal) an' loo&e' as if he +as loo&ing for+ar' to a )eeting +ith .aster instea' of another $eration He loo&e' so blissful an' hay ugene Aynn an' ! +ere

60



on each si'e of his be' He too& ugene7s han' an' )ine in each one of his han's an' sai', 4Junior,before Durga ! +ant to say this, that you are going to be the successor of )y business ! +ant you tota&e care of -5 the sa)e +ay ! have ta&en care of it -5 shoul' co)e first, last, an' al+ays in yourthoughts to hel it4 ugene loo&e' at )e +ith tears in his eyes an' sai', 4Durga, ! 'on7t &no+ +hat a(uru )eans, but to )e that is +hat ncle Ji))y is to )e, his +ishes are )ine4 We then )e'itate'

until they ca)e for hi) His face +as blissful ! again reeate' the 'uties ! erfor)e' at the hositalthe first ti)e ach 'ay as ! shave' aasi, ! notice' there +ere unusually a lot of 'ifferent nurses +hoca)e in an' out +ith so)e retense or another ! hear' later that they ca)e in ust to +atch )e shavehi), for ! 'i' it +ith such ease an' they li&e' to +atch )e ! +as so use' to having eole +atch )eshave hi), ! got so ! 'i' not )in' their co)ing in an' out ! shave' aasi fro) then on for there)ain'er of his 'ays an' every 'ay

Ra8asi1s Apart*ent at te /ead5uarters

Whenever aasi ca)e to visit .t Washington, +hile our Belove' .aster +as still +ith us, fro) the very beginning of aasi7s visit in 1933, .aster )ove' out of his be'roo) an' staye' in his library,un'er ours an' aasi7s rotestations .aster also +ille' aasi his living ?uarters, for aasi ha' no

roo) at .t Washington, but aasi an' all of us 'eci'e' that .aster7s be'roo) an' library shoul' be&et ust as .aster left it, as a shrine #herefore, this left aasi +ith only the library to stay in #he.arch of .aster7s .ahasa)a'hi, aasi +as electe' the secon' Presi'ent of -5 !, an' all, felt heshoul' have a lace of his o+n to live in +hen he ca)e to .t Washington, ! ha' loo&e' at the oento+er orch an' sa+ the ossibility of )a&ing a +on'erful ?uiet aart)ent for hi) an' suggeste' tohi), 4Why 'on7t you let us buil' you an aart)ent on the to+erO ! loo&e' u there an' it +ill )a&e anice lace +ith bath, &itchen an' all *ou 'ont have a lace at .t Washington e6cet .aster7slibrary4 He ans+ere', 4! +ill thin& it over4 Aater, he sai' so)ething ! ha' never hear' hi) say before,4(o ahea' +ith the aart)ent for )e, an' ! +ant the best4 ! busie' )yself )a&ing lans for it "fterit +as co)lete, he sai' to )e, 4*ou 'on7t have a roo) at .t Washington, ! +ant you to occuy thatroo) +hen ! a) not here4 ! thought he )eant +hen he +ent to :ansas City on his tris, but no+ !

see +hat he )eant

aasi re)aine' in the hosital fro) "ril 23r' to .ay 22n' #he 'octors 'ischarge' hi) earlierbecause the ublicity that aasi +as getting fro) his )illion='ollar gift to -5 #he 'octors thoughthe +oul' be able to hi'e fro) the reorters if he left the hosital, but they 'i' not +ant hi) to go toncinitas for they still +ante' to see hi) every 'ay for another +ee&, so they a'vise' hi) to co)e to.t Washington Ho+ hay +e +ere that +e ha' his ne+ aart)ent rea'y for hi) to receive the'octors an' his business associates Ho+ very e)barrasse' +e +oul' have been to have the) co)e tosee aasi living in the library +ithout even a be', but only a roll=a+ay to slee on, being the Presi'entan' his )illion 'ollar gift to -5 !t +as +orth buil'ing it even for the short ti)e he staye' in it, foronly that one +ee& "n' ho+ hay ! a), although ! +as not lanning this ne+ aart)ent for )yself

! sincerely areciate living in its scenic to+er an' ?uietness, until such ti)e that .aster +ill 'ee) )ego to his !nfinite ho)e or +herever he bi's )e go on this earth lanet #his re)in's )e of .astersrohecy +hen he sai' in 193, 4%ever )in' Du, you +ill have )any nice roo)s to live in so)e 'ay4

Ra8asi Bu$s a Ne' Car

aasi returne' to ncinitas after this +ee& +as u for the su))er !n -ete)ber, 190K, ust beforereturning to Borrego for the +inter, aasi announce' that he +ante' a ne+ car "lthough his crea)$l's)obile, +hich +as several years ol', +as still in goo' con'ition, it +as in -57s na)e He as&e')e to go to -an Diego to ic& out a car for hi), that he +ante' all the ne+ e?ui)ent such as o+ersteering, bra&es, etc he +as hay +ith )y choice an' al+ays calle' it )y car ! thought he +as ustsaying that for he +as not a )an +ho +oul' often say, 4.y this or )y that4 -a' to say he only ro'e in

it a fe+ ti)es "fter aasis assing, ! as&e' ugene Aynn ho+ he +ante' )e to sen' the car bac& tohi), as the car +as bought in aasi7s Co)anys na)e Before Daya, .atai, -ailasuta an' others,

61



ugene ans+ere', 4! +ant you to have that car Durga, an' 'isose of ncle Ji))y7s clothes as you seefit, the boys here )ay be able to use the)4 %ee'less to say ho+ grateful ! +as to have the ne+ car, forit +as so )uch easier to 'rive than the ol' one, +hich ! ha' thought ! +oul' be using to go bac& an'forth to Borrego or ncinitas for +ee&en's or vacations, feeling -5 coul' not affor' to let )eersonally have a car for )y use all the ti)e

I 6et Oters to /elp %e

" +ee& before leaving for Borrego for the +inter, 190K, one )orning early, ! hear' a heavy thu' onthe floor ! ran u to fin' that aasi ha' fainte' right in front of his close' 'ressing roo) 'oor ! ha'to ush gently because his hea' +as against the 'oor ! +as alone in the house, even the Ae+ises +eregone By the ti)e ! got hel fro) the -5 retreat, aasi ha' gotten u an' +as bac& in be' again

#his gave )e such a fright that ! as&e' for the first ti)e in nineteen years for hel, for so)eone to stayin the north en' of the her)itage to be on call in case such a thing haene' again Daya sent -ra''hafor a+hile 5or the last five )onths of aasi7s life ! +as than&ful to have hel fro) the alternatingsouls< .rinalini, -ra''ha, Pat Hogan, an' the last fe+ +ee&s .atai staye' +ith )e all the ti)e !t +as arelief to have so)eone to hel )e, for those last )onths +ere very strenuous ones aasi 'i' not

suffer, but re?uire' )uch )ore attention, for to+ar's the last he ha' to be fe', shave', an' so)eonego +ith hi) on his +al&s, for fear he +oul' stu)ble an' hurt hi)self "lthough ! ha' 'ee faith an'the hoe that aasi +oul' co)e out of this, ! still coul' not get ri' of the constant feeling of e6tre)eheaviness of heart aasi 'i' not suffer at all, nor 'i' he have ains u to an' even after his last an'thir' $eration He +as able to ta&e care of )ost of his ersonal chores e6cet shave, but by the ti)e

+e got to Borrego, the latter art of -ete)ber, he +as not able to fee' hi)self, for his right ar) +as +ea&er He +as al+ays so very clean about his erson that -illing so)ething 'istresse' hi) so #oavoi' his being nervous about it, ! or the one +ho +as heling )e fee' hi)N !7) sorry, ! 'ontre)e)ber +ho +as heling )e at that ti)e, either Pat or .rinalini or both ! 'o &no+ that-arolanan'a staye' in the cottage an' +oul' co)e at night to ta&e the night shift, for ! +as afrai' to letaasi u to go to the bathroo) 'uring the night alone

Ra8asi1s Tird Operation

!t see)e' li&e +e ha' been at Borrego ust a short ti)e +hen the sy)to)s returne' ! calle' Dr%ovac at ncinitas, he right a+ay +ante' to bring the a)bulance +ith hi), but ! tol' hi) ! 'i' not

+ant the a)bulance to co)e +here aasi coul' see it before he coul' tal& to aasi beforehan' an'give hi) at least a short +arning of the things to co)e When the 'octor ca)e, he 'i' bring thea)bulance, but it +as &et at a 'istance Doctor %ovae, +ho) Doctor Ae+is ha' 'riven 'o+n, tal&e'

+ith aasi #he Ae+ises, bless their hearts, they +ere al+ays on han' 'uring )y greatest trials an'hele' )e )ore than anyone else in those trying three years !t too& so)e ti)e to convince aasi togo to the hosital 5inally, he agree' ! ro'e +ith aasi in the a)bulance, fearful ! +oul' be seasic&,

but (o's )ercy +as +ith )e aasi slet all the +ay .rs Ae+is 'rove aasis car to sho+ the )enthe +ay -he too& the girls, .rinalini an' Pat, +ith her When +e got to the hosital, Doctor aneythought aasi loo&e' better than he ha' anticiate' He sai' that the ri'e 'o+n to Aos "ngeles ha'arre' the tu)or 'o+n enough to relieve the ressure He entere' the hosital on $ctober 0, 190K, an'it 'i' not beco)e necessary to oerate until $ctober 13, +hen the ressure returne' He again sentanother )onth this ti)e We 'rove hi) 'irectly to Borrego, the girls 'riving u to $ceansi'e #hen.rs Ae+is )et us there to sho+ the girls the +ay -he 'rove the rest of the +ay to Borrego aasi +asthe first one to see her stan'ing on the curb +aiting for us to ic& her u, he sai', 4Well, +ell4

Ra8asi1s Last 4a$s

aasi never returne' to his belove' her)itage again after he left it the later art of -ete)ber, 190K

We ha' hoe' that by the ti)e aasi left the hosital, he +oul' be able to go 'irectly to his ne+far)house, for he ha' not seen it yet But, +e ha' to +ait until the 'ay before #han&sgiving to )ove

62



in, he +as so an6ious to )ove in that even a fe+ hours 'elay 'islease' hi) When +e finally arrive', +e too& hi) in his +heelchair to see every inch of the house He +as e6tre)ely lease', for this too, +as another longstan'ing 'esire of his to buil' a ho)e on his belove' far) in Borrego

#his thir' an' last $eration on the oor soul left hi) noticeably +ea&er #o the 'octor7sa)a>e)ent, he still 'i' not suffer nor ha' any ain 5or usually this is a very 'ifficult 'isease to han'le

an' to en'ure, only through .aster7s !ntervention an' blessings on his o+n, his Belove' Aittle $ne,this coul' be ossible ! re)e)ber .aster saying, 4! a) suffering that you all )ay not suffer4 #hisrove' it to )e beyon' the sha'o+ of a 'oubt ! ha' to erfor) all nursing 'uties for hi)N by thisti)e, he coul' 'o nothing for hi)self What really surrise' )e, ! &ne+ aasi ha' al+ays been veryhealth=conscious an' to see hi) so co)letely resigne' to his fate +as to )e nothing short of a)iracle Doctor aney, the younger brother, ca)e t+ice to see aasi at his far)house ! re)e)beraasi7s face +hen he sa+ the 'octor "fter he ha' left, ! ha' to assure aasi that he +as not goingbac& to the hosital, for ! coul' see by his eyes he thought the 'octor ha' co)e to ta&e hi) again foranother $eration, an' ! coul' see he 'i' not +ant to go through that again We too& aasi out on hisorch for sunbaths, an' +here he coul' +atch the hire' .e6ican boys +or& on the far), or see us

+or&ing in the rest of the house He +as har'ly ever alone, there +as al+ays one of us +ith hi) We

too& hi) for ri'es 'o+n the roa' in his +heelchair an' hele' hi) +al& We +ere relieve' to haveDoctor %eville, a goo' local 'octor, co)e every 'ay to see an' ren'er aasi any ai' he +oul' nee' !,also, thought of getting the nurse aasi ha' in the hosital, but both 'octors sai', 4He is getting farbetter care fro) you than any rivate nurse +oul' ever 'o for hi) !f you can hol' u un'er the strain,it +oul' be better for hi) to have you an' others than strangers4 Doctor %eville often re)ar&e' ho+

very clean an' o'orless aasi7s bo'y +as an' not even one be'sore on his bac& When Doctor aneyca)e for the last ti)e after January 1, 1900, he +as surrise' to see ho+ soft aasi7s s&in +as an' ho+fle6ible his araly>e' li)bs +ere, for usually i))obile li)bs beco)e still soon Doctor aney tease')e saying, 4We shoul' have you co)e to the hosital an' give those nurses a lesson on ho+ to ta&ecare of a atient !f you +ant a ob, ust call )e4 "fter bathing every 'ay, ! ha' -arolanan'a co)e inthe afternoon or Pat, give aasi a goo' rub 'o+n +ith oil, an' e6ercise aasi7s +hole bo'y We raise'

hi) an' hele' hi) stan' as often as he coul' be strong enough to 'o so

When .atai ca)e the last fe+ +ee&s to hel )e, she brought +ith her several of .aster7s gifts tohi) an' aasi7s roserity cross he love' so +ell aasi ha' these things in his han' We coul' notget it a+ay fro) hi) even after he ha' fallen aslee He clung to anything that +as .aster7s an' neverloo&e' a+ay fro) .aster7s icture that +as on the 'resser lace' +here he coul' see it We &et it litall night He also loo&e' at the -t 5rancis statue the Benaus ha' given hi) +hile he +as in thehosital $ne afternoon, -arolanan'a +as heling )e +ith aasi by turning hi) on his si'e, so hisbac& coul' be +ashe' !n the rocess of turning hi), aasi loo&e' u at )e, then at -arolanan'a sos+eetly, ut his goo' ar) aroun' -arolanan'a7s nec& an' ulle' his hea' to his chest an' hel' hi)there for a long ti)e, blessing hi) (rateful tears roile' 'o+n -arolanan'a7s eyes "fter that blessing,

+e notice' a 'efinite change in -arolanan'a7s better behavior "t 'ifferent ti)es, each one that +asheling hi), aasi gave a secial blessing as if he +ante' to e6ress his areciation for the serviceren'ere' hi) $ne 'ay, loo&ing at hi), ! sai', 4With all the +on'erful care you too& of your bo'y, thebest of healthful foo's, e6ercises, still, it 'i' not revent all this4 #hough he coul' not sea& in thoselast 'ays, he no''e' his hea' in aroval Within those sa)e 'ays, ! as&e' hi), 4Di' you see .asterO4He no''e', 4*es4 ! then as&e', 4What 'i' he sayO4 !n ans+er, tears ca)e to his sa', 'ee blue eyes,bo+e' his hea', the e6ression +as that .aster ha' tol' hi) that he +as soon going to hi) an'leaving us #he thought +ent right through )e, but as +e never lose hoe, &no+ing that (o' canacco)lish )ore )iracles, )y faith &et strong, +hen so)eone +oul' say let us ray that he getsbetter When ! raye' )y )in'7s thoughts +oul' be strong for hi) to re)ain for -5 an' all of us,but on the other ban' )y heart coul' not 'eny aasi the free'o) of his !nfinite ho)e +ith our

glorious .aster7s Co)any a+aiting hi) .y heart coul' not 'eny hi) that rivilege an' re+ar'During the last )onth of aasi7s life, ugene Aynn ca)e to see hi) !n the course of one of his

63



conversations +ith )e, he tol' )e that aasi7s fa)ily +oul' insist that his bo'y be returne' to :ansasCity in the event that he asse', he ha' a rivate cryt #his 'eely hurt )e for )y faith +as so strongthat ! 'i' not thin& in the ter)s of his leaving, nor 'i' it occur to )e that aasi belonge' to any otherfa)ily than his -5 'ivine fa)ily ! ans+ere' that +hen the ti)e 'i' co)e, +e ha' hoe' +e coul'lace hi) ne6t to .aster, for there is an e)ty lace ne6t to .aster ugene sai', 4! a) sorry Durga,

to hurt you this +ay, if it +as u to )e he coul' re)ain here, but ! &no+ "unt 5rie'a +oul' not hearof it4 #hat is the reason aasi is interre' in :ansas City instea' of at 5orest Aa+n +ith .aster

Doctor aney7s last visit on January 2 or 3, 1900, he tol' )e that he 'i' not thin& aasi coul' lastany longer than t+o or three +ee&s an' that he 'i' not thin& the tu)or +oul' be the cause of hisgoing He e6laine' to )e to reare )y )in' of +hat to e6ect, that this brain tu)or 'isease bringson a filling u of the lungs7 'isease an' it fills u so rai'ly that nothing can sto it, not even taing

+oul' hel #his 'eely 'eresse' )e ! sai' nothing to the others, but as (o' is )erciful, he still &et)y hoe an' faith strong an' to the fore, thin&ing that (o' +ho +as the creator of the +orl' an' allthings, 'isease as +ell, if He so +ishe' it, He coul' revent this fatal 'isease fro) attac&ing aasi

Ra8asi1s +assing

#he )orning of 5ebruary 19, 1900, Doctor %eville ca)e as usual He as&e' )e if aasi ha' beenbreathing so heavily for long ! sai' ! ha' not notice' He tol' )e he +oul' co)e bac& that night !t

+as aroun' 1@<@@ ) +hen he ca)e bac& an' ronounce' the fatal +or's that aasi7s lungs +erefilling u an' it +as a fatal 'isease an' to encourage )e he a''e', 4He )ay last until the ne6t 'ay, butthat he coul' leave anyti)e4 ! +as totally unreare' for such ne+s Auc&ily, Daya, -ailasuta, an'.rinalini ha' co)e for the +ee&en' %one of us left his roo) that night ! sit by his si'e an' hel' hisgoo' han' in )ine to the en' ! coul' feel the life force leaving his han's an' feet ! &et )y eyesglue' to his face an' eyes "s ! +as 'oing so, ! coul' see his eyes getting 'i))er an' a +hite light +asaroun' his hea' ! hear' .asters voice say to )e 4! a) ta&ing hi) a+ay, Du, an' no one +ill be ableto sto )e4 ! )entally ans+ere', 4! &no+, -ir, an' ! coul' an' +oul' not +ant to sto you, for he +ill

be haier +ith you than in this earthly rison4 "fter+ar's, ! coul' not hel but thin& ho+ )uch +e'een' on that little breath that goes in an' out, only through (o'7s grace We hung on to each breaththat aasi too& When it ca)e in, +e unconsciously breathe' +ith hi) +ith a sigh of relief #hen ustonce at K a) -un'ay, 5ebruary 2@, 1900, the breath 'i' not co)e bac& -o )any, yes, even hun're'sof ersons lives +ere change' by the re)oval of that life giving breath of a successful business )anan' such a great -aint "s ! left, the roo) Doctor %eville gave )e so)ething to 'rin& ! 'i' not &no+! +as ta&ing so)ething to )a&e )e slee ! 'i' not see aasi again until the services #he ne6t)orning the 5orest Aa+n )en ca)e for aasi7s bo'y ! ha' to ans+er )any ?uestions #he girls

+oul' not let )e go in aasis roo) +here he +as resting to get his clothes for the 5orest Aa+n )en

We +ere going to have a service for the ublic an' after+ar's one for -elf=eali>ation 5ello+shi)e)bers, at +hich ti)e ! +as as&e' to 'rae aasi7s orange scarf over his chest an' in on his -5

in ! sai' ! 'i' not thin& ! coul' 'o it, but as ! sit for a+hile in the fa)ily roo) crying, a voice ca)e to)e saying, 4Why are you not going to 'o this last service for hi), +ho) you have serve' for nineteenyears "re you going to 'eny hi) this last serviceO4 ! tol' -ailasuta ! +oul' 'o it after all When ! +entu ! sa+ hi) for the first ti)e, an' then ! &ne+ that he +as no longer inhabiting this shell of a bo'y

"ll through the eole filing by to see hi), ! intuitively sa+ .aster an' aasi sitting si'e by si'e overthe cas&et hol'ing han's as they use' to, an' as each one ca)e to ay their last resects ! coul' hear.aster saying to aasi, 4*ou 'i' not &no+, so )any eole &ne+ an' love' you, 'i' youO4 ! feltbetter, an' the ain of losing our blesse' -aint so soon after our Belove' Christ=li&e .aster +aslessene' a little ! +as an' still a) eternally grateful for -arolanan'a, .rinalini, Pat Hogan, -ra''ha,an' .atai, for all the &in' hel they an' all have ren'ere' to aasi, an' for relieving )e so )uch inthe hours of )y, an' -5s, secon' e6tre)e trial of losing its secon' resi'ent

64



I "as Asked To Be +resident

"fter +e left 5orest Aa+n, Daya ha' an aoint)ent to &ee .atai, #ara an' others ca)e along #hey 'i' not +ant )e to go 'irectly to .t Washington but go +ith the) on a little 'rive %o+ ! &no+ +hy #ara is so sel'o) +ith us, they thought +e ha' better ta&e this oortunity to as& )e +hat they +ante' her to aroach )e +ith +hile Daya +as at her aoint)ent #ara too& )e asi'e an' sai',

4%o+ that aasi is gone, +e +ill have to aoint another resi'ent ! so&e to Daya an' she felt +eshoul' as& you first because you are the el'est sister What 'o you sayO4 ! very ositively ans+ere', 4!

+oul'n7t bur'en -5 +ith another unhealthy resi'ent for .aster has tol' )e )y life too is in 'angeras )uch as his an' aasi7s +ere, an' it +oul' be ba' for -5 ! honestly believe that Daya +oul')a&e a far better resi'ent than !4 ! only reeate' to #ara +hat ! ha' tol' .rinalini a short ti)ebefore aasi7s assing, an' later to ugene Aynn an' to Daya ! believe' it then, ! )ore strongly thanever still believe that )y choice of serving (o', .aster, an' -5 is better for )e ! a) sincerelythan&ful that ! renege' in Daya7s favor

.aster ha' +ritten in -5 by=la+s that the Boar' of Directors +oul' elect the thir' -5Presi'ent ! re)aine' a fe+ 'ays at .t Washington, then returne' to aasi7s Borrego far) house to

gather aasi7s clothes an' ersonal effects an' househol' belongings to refurnish aasi7s .t Washington aart)ent ! 'i' the sa)e at ncinitas "t first ! thought ! +oul' stay in ncinitas as ! 'i'before, but ! re)e)bere' .aster7s +or's several years revious +hen ! as&e' hi), 4What can ! 'o tofurther )y siritual rogressO4 he ans+ere' si)ly, 4Don7t stay too )uch alone, )i6 )ore +itheole4

.y re)e)brance of this thought )a'e )e 'eci'e to live at .t Washington When ! gave u )yroo) at .t Washington in 19K;, .aster ha' sai', 4*ou can occuy )y library +henever you co)e uhere as a guest4 ! tol' .atai +hat aasi ha' tol' )e about )y using his aart)ent +hen he +as nothere -he ans+ere', 4! thought as )uch, besi'es there is no other roo) available, they are all ta&en4

"nother reason +as she +ante' to use the library for her o+n office

I %o)e Back to te /ead5uarters

! too& all the furnishings ! +oul' nee' at .t Washington fro) ncinitas ! thought ! +oul' &eeaasi7s ncinitas aart)ent intact an' use it for +ee&en's or vacations 'uring the su))er, but !thought, 4Ho+ selfish of )e to hol' such a +on'erful aart)ent for occasional visits4

#he Ae+ises ha' 'one so )uch for aasi an' )e an' +ere al+ays there +hen ! nee'e' the) the)ost, so )y thought +as to let the) have aasi7s aart)ent for their ho)e *ou have never seen suchsurrise' an' lease' souls as those t+o +ere +hen ! tol' the) about )y 'ecision ! ha' the right to'o that, for aasi ha' bought all his o+n things an' ugene Aynn ha' tol' )e to 'isose of all histhings as ! sa+ fit

"fter ! got settle' in )y ne+ ?uarters at .t Washington ! reste' for a )onth, then ! resu)e'tying .aster7s letters to aasi an' to )e ! coie' the) verbati) #he first sheet is attache' to.aster7s original han'+ritten letters, an' the first carbon coy is for -5 files .aster +rote aboutseveral subects in one letter 5or the thir' coy, ! cut the 'ifferent subects out of .aster7shan'+ritten letters, an' file' the) in each their o+n subects an' +rote< -5 History, +ith .aster7s,aasi7s, an' )y art in each roect -ubects +hich cover -5 historyN +ith .aster7s, aasi7s an' )ylife searately ! 'on7t &no+ +hat +ill beco)e of these files or if anyone +ill ever get to rea' the), butat least ! have the satisfaction of &no+ing that ! have 'one )y art in recor'ing +hat ! &no+ of -5history, of .aster7s, an' aasi7s life, an' also )y o+n insignificant life in the +orl' as +ell as in )ysiritual ho)e at .t Washington an' ncinitas3

3 :n a letter dated June $5, 194#, Master 'rites to a2asi, ;Du2<s health is (rearious l a! (raing* lease don=t tell her : told this to ou***>

65



"inters at Borrego

#he first an' secon' year ! sent the +inter )onths in Borrego an' ca)e to .t Washington only onoccasions 'uring the +inter ! re)aine' at .t Washington all su))er While ! +as at Borrego +interof 190;, ! hear' .aster7s voice say, 4Why 'ont you co)e here 8Borrego only to rest, instea' of all

+inter as you 'oO4 #he rest of the thoughts ca)e very clear to )e, that .aster +ante' )e to stay at.t Washington an' only co)e to Borrego to rest +henever ! nee'e' to get a+ay fro) the s)og !have been 'oing this ever since

!n the su))er )onths, ! have starte' to go to ncinitas for )y +ee&s of rest instea' of re)ainingat .t Washington all su))er ! enoy it all +ith our Belove' .aster7s blessings When ! say ! hear'.aster7s voice, ! intuitively hear it ust as lain as if ! actually hear' hi) sea&

I Ser)e %aster Tree 7ears A-ter /is %aasa*adi

!n the beginning of our e)ty life +ithout .aster7s resence, ! again hear' his 'ivine voice say, 4*oustarte' out by serving )e, you shall en' by serving )e4 ! too& this to )ean that +hen ! first arrive' at

.t Washington in 1929 ! serve' .aster alone, then +hen .aster gave )e the resonsibility to care foraasi, ! +as serving both .aster an' aasi "fter aasis first oeration, he +oul' be constantlya)a>e' at the absence of feeling that he +as in his o+n bo'y He so very often e6clai)e', 4! tell you itis not )e in this bo'y, ! 'ie' on the oerating table, it is .aster +ho is occuying this bo'y, no+ ! feelhis bo'y s+aying in )ine, ! feel his hea' in )y hea'4 #hese e6cla)ations brought to )in' .astersre'iction +hen aasi +as reeating the )antra in .asters ear at his .ahasa)a'hi, 4! +ill co)e bac&into your bo'y an' in the consciousness of everybo'y4

#here +as another re'iction of this tye that .aster +rote in one of his letters to aasi in 1930,! ?uote it here, 4! a) so hay that ! have foun' so)eone that ! +ill be able to live in after ! a) goneinto the !nfinite4 -ince it +as .aster +ho +as also occuying aasis bo'y ! +as still serving both,

but after aasis assing, ! a) bac& to only serving .aster again ! feel ! have actually serve' .asterthree years after his o+n .ahasa)a'hi .aster7s vibrations an' resence +ere so revalent 'uringthose three years ! +as not the only one +ho felt the), but all +ho ca)e in contact +ith aasi Hes+aye' +hen he +al&e' as .aster use' to ven the aearance of aasis bo'y change' in )any of.asters for)s When .aster +as not resent in aasi7s bo'y ! felt it i))e'iately, an' ! +oul' as&aasi, 4.aster has not been here these last fe+ 'aysO4 He +oul' ans+er, 4%o, he is busy so)e+here'oing so)ething4

While aasi +as convalescing in the 'esert an' ncinitas, he ha' ne+ siritual e6eriences al)ostevery 'ay, +hich he narrate' to )e "fter hearing the), ! i))e'iately +rote the) 'o+n an' rea'the) to hi) to fin' out if ! ha' gotten the) as he ha' tol' the) to )e ! have a coy of the) in thesefiles

%$ 4rea* o- 0uture /ardsips

! re)e)ber a 'istinct 'rea) ! ha' in the beginning of aasis illnesses ! +as stan'ing on a s)all raftin the +ater -o)eone ushe' a large, heavy car'boar' bo6 on the raft, an' then a secon' bo6 ! sai',4!f you ut any)ore on this raft it +ill sin&,4 but still a thir' bo6 +as ushe' on the raft !t 'i' notsin&, but it +ent un'er a bit ! ca)e to un'erstan' the )eaning of the three bo6es ushe' on the raftof )y life #hese +ere the three years of har'shi ! ha' to un'ergo 'uring aasi7s illness 'uring thethree oerations #hough the hysical har'shis +ere )any an' heavy in this life, one )ust e6ect tocarry a cross of sacrifice to lease the Aor' Whenever ! )entally 'oubte' if ! +as 'oing all .astere6ecte' of )e to+ar's )y services to aasi 'uring his illness, .aster +oul' invariably ans+er )y)ental ?uestions through aasi, saying, 4.aster is very lease' +ith +hat you are 'oing for )e4

"nother ti)e ! )entally as&e' .aster if he love' )e #he ne6t )orning aasi blesse' )e saying,4*ou 'on7t &no+ ho+ )uch .aster loves you4 Coul' ! then 'oubt that our Belove' .aster +as

66



ans+ering )y ?uestions !n )y thirty=one years +ith .aster an' -5, )y grateful than&s are toonu)erous to e6ress 5irst, to have foun' )y Belove' Christ=li&e .aster, Para)hansa *oganan'a,secon', that he accete' an une'ucate' +a' of clay an' atiently )ol'e' it accor'ing to his sacre''esign .y constant rayer has been an' still is, that ! so live )y life in this siritual ho)e, an' in )yconsciousness, that +hen ! 'ose these )ortal eyes an' float to .asters infinite shores he +ill )eet )e

at the astral gate, an' )y eyes )eeting his +ill be able to say, 4! have been #hine al+ays4 #he en' of this, )y autobiograhy, is co)lete on July 1K, 1909 ! +oul' li&e to a'' ust this

)uch, that on June 2, 1909, .aster gave )e several )essages 5irst, that he +as very lease' +ith the +or& ! +as 'oing, an' )any other +on'erful other things +hich ! cannot reveal for it is far too sacre'to )e, but this )uch ! +ill sayN that ! have )uch +or& to 'o +ith souls yet an' that he +oul' co)e for)e very soon Who is to say +hen, for .asters astral ti)e 'oc& is so )uch 'ifferent fro) ours Who isto say ho+ soon is very soon to hi) ! can only say ! a) finishing )y +or& as fast as ! can, that he hasor'aine' )e to 'o, an' carry on +ith +hatever he +ill sen' )e to acco)lish in the future When he isrea'y to co)e for the occuant of this shell, ! shall be rea'y to float a+ay +ith hi) an' to be able tosay +ith hi), 45or oy ! ca)e, for oy ! live', an' in that sacre' oy ! no+ )elt +ith hi)4

With all )y love in our .aster7s service,

.a Durga July 1K, 1909

67



Contents< Boo& !!

Chil'hoo' 1

5irst Job 2Publications about aasi 3aasi as "ccountant ;3.arriage ;35irst .eeting +ith .aster ;Kaasi7s 5irst Hea'?uarters isit ;aasi Calls -5 Ho)e ;Christ)as ;;.asters !n'ia #ri 9@Her)itage Create' 93aasi7s Business 5ace 9

aasi7s 5oo' Habits 9aai7s 19K !llness 1@@6ercises 1@@-+i))ing in the $cean 1@1aasi7s Hobby 1@1aasi (iving .oney to .e)bers 1@3$'ors an' Cleanliness 1@3aasi7s ea'ing Habits 1@3Carrying Heavy Weights 1@Kaasi7s Dressing Habits 1@KAan'sli'e 1@0

gliness an' %egativeness 1@0cono)ical Habits 1@05inances 1@0Public 5unctions 11@-ense of -)ell 11@

War 111Bangle 112Planes 112

o+s 11Kaasi egar'ing "ni)als 110-atan Wanting to Destroy aasi7s Bo'y 11

.aster7s Aast isit to ncinitas 11Desert/Borrego 11.aster Calls aasi in .arch 1902 11;.aster7s .ahasa)a'hi 11;aasi eeats .antra for .aster 119aasi7s 5irst -y)to)s of !llness 1195irst $eration 12@

isions 121-atan -till #rying to Destroy aasi 1225ire in aasi7s "art)ent 123.ore isions 12K

aasi #ells of (iving .illions to -5 12.en fro) !n'ia isit aasi 12

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aasi (ives .illion Dollars in -toc&s 12;aasi7s -econ' $eration 129aasi Buil's His "art)ent at Hea'?uarters 13@%e+ Car 13@! (et Hel to Care for aasi 131

aai7s #hir' $eration, His !llness, His Passing 131.aster7s Aetters to aasi Jana&anan'a 133

"PP%D!M ! 139

70



"iography of Saint Lynn#

Spiritual Millionaire

Parents and !amily

. J J A*%%7- 5"#H W"- J-- W A*%% H W"- B$% !% %o6ubee County,.ississii, on "ril 3, 1;03 His arents )ove' to ichlan' Parish, Aouisiana, in the year 1;@ #hishan'so)e, blon'e !rish an' -cotch la' )arrie', but his )arriage +as short=live' His +ife 'ie' ofneu)onia, leaving hi) chil'less !n the early 1;;@s, Ja)es W Aynn )et a vibrant, energetic, 'ar&=eye' -cotch lassie by the na)e of -alethia "rchibal' When they +ere )arrie', they rente' a far) an'occuie' the lone, one=roo) log cabin #hey calle' it a t+o=roo) cabin, although it 'i' not have aartition Here their si6 chil'ren +ere born

#he chil'rens na)es are given here in the or'er in +hich they ca)e into this +orl' obert Braylive' to the age of K0N he 'ie' of cancer of the a+ .ary, better &no+n as .a)ie, )arrie' Charles !Bilington 5ran& live' only to the age ofK2N it is believe' that he fell aslee at the +heel +hile 'rivinghis auto)obile an' +as &ille' #he fourth chil' +as our o+n aasi Jana&anan'a na)e' 4Ja)es4 after

an uncle, an' 4Jesse4 for his father -o)e )e)bers of his fa)ily calle' hi) 4Ji))y4 an' others calle'hi) 4Ji)4 #hese na)es are still use' to this 'ay 8190; by his frien's an' business associates Josehine +as born ne6t, an' )arrie' #W AoganN at the ti)e of this +riting 8190;, both sisters arestill living in "rchibal', Aouisiana ugene, +ho live' to the young age of 3@, +as &ille' +ith his frien's

+ho +ere returning fro) a fishing tri in the frien's7 rivate airlane He ha' been in t+o reviousairlane acci'ents before this fatal one -alethia7s arents, the "rchibal's, +ere the first ioneers in thearea #he to+n +as given the fa)ily na)e !t is still calle' "rchibal' to this 'ay #he "rchibal's o+ne'an' oerate' their 12@=acre far) to goo' a'vantage !t rovi'e' a goo' living for the)

-alethias father 'ie' in early 19@3 -alethia7s t+o brothers re)aine' to care for their )other an'oerate' the far) #he youngest brother, Ja)es, )arrie' an' +ent out on his o+n, leaving the el'estbrother, "lec, to shoul'er the resonsibility of the far) alone #his uncle 'early love' his favorite

nehe+, little Ji))y He re)aine' un)arrie' an' live' +ith his )other an' oerate' the far) untilhis 'eath "fter "lec7s assing, Ji))y7s fa)ily )ove' in +ith (ran')other "rchibal' to continuecaring for the far) an' her #he chil'ren +ere elate' at the rosect of living in a larger house When

Ji))y +as si6 years ol', the gran')other 'ie' -he left the 12@=acre far) to Ji))y7s arents an' theirchil'ren, +ith the un'erstan'ing that the rest of the heirs +oul' be ai' their share of the estate fro)the ro'uce of the far) $n this far) Jesse W Aynn, +ife, an' fa)ily live' until the arents7 'eath-alethia Aynn asse' the ortals of this +orl' on -ete)ber 1, 19K3 at the age of ;; Ja)es W Aynn,her husban', follo+e' her on "ugust !, 19K0, at the age f92 %e+saer accounts of the assing ofboth arents can be foun' in "en'i6 ! of this boo&

Cildood

Ja)es Jesse Aynn 8aasi Jana&anan'a +as born on .ay 0, 1;92 in "rchibal', Aouisiana Aittle Ji))y

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+as a very sensitive chil' !n 1903, his sister tol' )e, 4Ji))y +as )ore li&e a little girl than a boy4 Henever 'estroye' anything He tol' )e later, 4When )y brothers laye' too rough, ! +ith're+ an' hi'behin' a tree an' if so)eone +as hurt, ! +oul' cry +ith the)4 He staye' ho)e +ith his )other ratherthan lay +ith the boys #he log cabin only ha' a firelace in +hich to coo& their )eals !t +as Ji))y7s'uties to buil' the fire, +ash the brea&fast an' 'inner 'ishes, )il& 1K co+s, churn the butter, an' hel

his )other +ith househol' chores He ic&e' cotton but a fe+ ti)es, actually never +or&ing in thecultivating 'eart)ent of the far) He +al&e' three )iles to sell t+o or three oun's of butter at thecountry store He +oul' rou'ly bring the sales )oney to his )other #his +as her only househol'e6ense )oneyN luc&ily, she +as a thrifty +o)an When Ji))y +as aroun' seven years ol', he hele'his )other lant so)e ecan trees aroun' the house, +hich are no+ huge beautiful trees that are stillbearing large s+eet ecans

Ji))y ha' a %egro lay)ate, +hose )other regar'e' Ji))y as one of her o+n favorite chil'ren Whenever Ji))y visite' her, +hich +as often, she ran to )eet hi), ic&e' hi) u in her ar)s, an'carrie' hi) in the house to fee' hi) the s+eet ti'bits she ha' save' for hi) Aittle Ji))y reson'e'to her 'ee love ven after 0@ years elase', as he tol' )e this story, tears strea)e' 'o+n his chee&s

+ith the recollection of the 'ee chil'ish sorro+ he felt at her assing, +hen he +as still but a s)all

boy

Ji))y an' his 'og +ent into the +oo's often to lay $ne 'ay he got lostN he +as gone so longthat the neighbors for)e' a osse an' +ent out in search for hi) #hey foun' hi) frightene', crying,an' trying 'eserately to fin' his +ay bac& ho)e

Aittle Ji))y +ore 'resses an' long hair u to the age of si6 He starte' school at the early age offive He felt a 'ee urge for e'ucation He +al&e' t+o )iles to a log cabin school He +as very 'iligentin his stu'ies He +as set u as an e6a)le to the other chil'renN he +as also a lea'er a)ongst hislay)ates He ha' a gift for selling an' giving 'efinitions of +or's When he +ent to the store to sellthe butter, the store&eeer an' the el'ers in the general store gathere' aroun' Ji))y, sat hi) on thecounter, an' 'elighte' in as&ing hi) to sell long +or's Without hesitation, he selle' the +or' an'

gave the) the 'efinition as +ell "s a re+ar', they gave hi) a iece of can'y= or fruit #he fa)ilyrarely ha' enough )oney to buy fruit an' fresh vegetables -o)eti)es the chil'ren +oul' get an alean' an orange an' nuts in their Christ)as stoc&ing "t those ti)es, Ji))y sat on the floor +ith a bo+lbet+een his legs an' e)tie' the contents of his stoc&ing into the bo+l an' ate to his heart7s content

#hat +as the only gift they ha', but it +as to the) a hay event

$n his store tre&, he notice' there +as al+ays a barrel of nice re' ales stan'ing on the floorAittle Ji))y +oul' loo& at the) longingly an' hungrily $ne 'ay Ji))y +as esecially hungry forfruit #he sight of the beautiful ales +as too )uch for little Ji))y He ran u to the barrel, snatche'a large re' ale, ran outsi'e, sat on the front stes of the store, an' hungrily ate the ale #he el'erslaughe' to see Ji))y 'evour his so)e+hat stolen ale

"t the age of seven or eight, Ji))y7s right leg began to curl un'er hi) !t +as very ainful Bu)saeare' on his thigh an' calf #he 'octor ha' to lance the infeste' bu)s #he 'octor feare' thatbecause the leg +as so ba'ly t+iste', Ji))y )ight not be able to straighten the leg out an' +oul're)ain a crile for the rest of his life But Ji))y7s strong +ill, even at that ten'er age, +as not goingto let anything li&e that &ee hi) 'o+n He starte' gra'ually stretching his leg, ulling it, an' e6ercisingit until he got it to resu)e a nor)al osition He never ha ' trouble +ith that leg after+ar' #he leg

+as as nor)al as the other

Ji))y learne' to lay baseball an' +as very rou' +hen he +as outfitte' +ith a baseball suit Histea) +on over the ol'er boys7 tea) !n the course of one of these ga)es, Ji))y bro&e the first ointof his thir' finger He 'i' not go to a 'octor for the bro&en ointN therefore, it re)aine' croo&e'

72



hel' its full co)le)ent of hay, slashing boys at that very )o)ent

#he boy +on'ere' +hat his father an' )other +oul' say if he ran 'o+n to the s+i))ing hole fora+hile He +oul'n7t be gone long, an' he i)agine' +ith boyish oti)is) that he coul' +or& all thebetter +hen he got bac& He )ight as& his )other, he consi'ere' He glance' to+ar' a littlefar)house not far a+ay to see if she +ere in sight #hen he starte' off, but stoe' abrutly, an' his

face too& on a serious loo&

Ho+ har' resse' the fa)ily +as to )a&e both en's )eet, the boy &ne+ He &ne+ also that hisfather nee'e' the cotton gathere' that if anything haene' to revent the fa)ily getting every cent of)oney it coul' fro) the ulti)ate yiel' it +oul' )ean har'er ti)es than ever, less foo' on the table forhis arents an' his five sisters an' brothers to eat

4!' better stay on the ob, ! guess,4 the boy sai' to hi)self, +ith a little sigh of regret 4.aybe ati)e +ill co)e +hen ! can go s+i))ing any ol' ti)e ! +ant to4

#hat ti)e has co)e, an' it is only t+enty=four years since the boy stoo' in the Aouisiana cottonfiel' an' envie' his co)anions in the 4ol' s+i))in7 hole4 not half a )ile a+ay

#o'ay the boy sits in a han'so)e rivate office on the thir' floor of the " Aong buil'ing an''irects the 'estinies of a concern that 'oes a business of three )illion 'ollars a year He o+ns in:ansas City real estate the entire area on the -outh -i'e that is boun'e' by -i6ty=fourth street on thenorth, .eyer Boulevar' on the south, .ichigan "venue on the +est, an' $live -treet on the east

His na)e is Ja)es Jesse Aynn, an' he is general )anager of the - erson n'er+ritingCo)any %ee'less to say, .r Aynn goes s+i))ing these 'ays +henever he 'esires, because hehaens to have a s+i))ing ool of his o+n at his ho)e But it )ust be a')itte' that he gets )oreenoy)ent out of laying eighteen holes of golf over the .ission Hills course than in all the s+i))inghe ever coul' 'o

Ja)es J Aynn shoul' never have been in that cotton fiel' in Aouisiana in the first lace Perhas

that is one reason that he got out of there ?uic&ly His +as one of the southern fa)ilies that the Civil War ruine' Before the secession, his gran'father ha' an estate in %orth Carolina +ith a large grou ofslaves on it an' a rating as a +ealthy )an in his neighborhoo' "fter the +ar, his gran'father +as usthis gran'father, an' 4Ji))y4 Aynn7s father +as a 4renter4 in Aouisiana, far)ing a bit of lan' in aneffort to )a&e both en's )eet an' having a struggle to achieve that result

#he )orning of .ay 0, 1;92, sa+ the birth of 4Ji))y4 Aynn, the fourth of a fa)ily 'estine' tocontain si6 chil'ren He ha' a brother, obert, a sister, .aryN an' a brother, 5ran&, +ho +ere ;, 0, an'3 years ol', resectively, +hen 4Ji))y4 +as born "nother sister, Josehine, ca)e three years later an'a brother, ugene, five years later #he Aynn chil'ren range' u+ar' in age an' si>e ust li&e stes

4Ji))y4 Aynn +as a recocious chil' He see)e' to be born +ith the +or' 4school4 on his )in'

When he har'ly +as able to tal&, he lise' out to his arents continually that he 4+ante' to go to tool4He +as so insistent that he +as grante' his re?uest at last an' +as ta&en before a country teacher +henhe still +as in 'resses "t 0, he coul' sell correctly every +or' in the ol' 4blue=bac& seller4 that +asuse' in country schools in those 'ays, an' ol'er chil'ren use' to be e)barrasse' because 4little Ji))yAynn4 +oul' outlast the) in the 5ri'ay afternoon selling bees

4Ji))y4 +ent to school until he +as 1K, getting an e'ucation that +as re)ar&able consi'ering thefact that at the sa)e ti)e he +as 'oing +or& on the far) $n the 'ay he reache' the high age of 1K, he

+as in the little to+n of .angha), Aa, near his father7s far), an' he hear' the telegrah instru)ent inthe railroa' station tic&ing

4!s that har' to learnO4 he as&e', fascinate'ly, of the station agent

4%ot very,4 the latter ans+ere' 4Why 'ont you co)e here an' +or& for )eO !7ll teach youtelegrahy in o'' )o)ents ! nee' so)eone to hel aroun' the lace *ou +on7t be sorry if you ta&e a

74



chance at it4

4Ho+ )uch +oul' you ay )eO4 as&e' young 4Ji))y4

4!7' have to see +hat the roa' allo+s an' get authori>ation fro) hea'?uarters, but ! i)agine youcoul' )a&e about L10 a )onth #hat7s high )oney for a boy your age4

4Ji))y4 agree' it +as He +ent gleefully ho)e to tell the 4fol&s4 about the gran' ob that +asgoing to be his E if railroa' 4hea'?uarters4 only sai' the +or' #he +or' +as sai', an' 4Ji))y4entere' the business +orl' as a general han'y )an at the .issouri Pacific railroa' station at .angha)He +or&e' there until $ctober of that year, learning telegrahy until he coul' sen' )essages +ell

#hen an oening 'eveloe' for an assistant agent at $a& i'ge, A", a osition that ai' L30 a )onth,)ore than t+ice as )uch as 4Ji))y4 +as getting

4Ji))y4 believe' he coul' han'le the ne+ ob an' consi'ere' alying for it +hen the agent at$a& i'ge, +ho &ne+ of 4Ji))y7s4 +or&, beat the boy to it, an' as&e' the 'ivision suerinten'ent ifyoung Aynn coul' not be )ove' to $a& i'ge #he ro)otion +ent through 4Ji))y4 +or&e'through the +inter, the busy season, at $a& i'ge, +ent bac& to .angha) in the sring, an' +as

al)ost tic&le' to 'eath to be 'rafte' by the 'ivision -uerinten'ent hi)self an' ta&en to the ter)inalat 5erra'ay, Aa, as assistant agent #he boy felt he +as getting along in life "s a )atter of fact, he +asHe +or&e' at 5erra'ay fro) 19@ to 19@9, the years bet+een his fifteenth an' seventeenth birth'ays

#hen a 'eression hit the -outh an' the railroa' announce' it +oul' have to lay off all of itscler&s at 5erra'ay e6cet one *oung Aynn ha' got his brother, 5ran&, a lace in the office an' the t+ohel' a council of +ar 4Ji))y4 +as the ran&ing )an in the office, accor'ing to seniority rule, an' +asentitle' to the one lace that +as to be left, but he +as single an' 5ran& +as )arrie' !f 5ran& lost hisob, there +oul' be t+o )ouths to fee' instea' of one "n' no one &ne+ +hen ti)es +oul' get better

4!7ll give you )y lace,4 4Ji))y4 volunteere' 4!t loo&s li&e the best +ay to +or& things out Don7t +orry about )e !7ll fin' so)ething to 'o so)e+here4

He 'i' Before the ti)e ca)e for hi) to leave 5erra'ay, he ha' receive' the offer of a osition ascler& in the .issouri, :ansas, G #e6as station of .oberly, .o #he traveling au'itor of the .issouriPacific ha' reco))en'e' hi) for it, 'esite the fact that it )eant sen'ing a goo' )an to a rivalrailroa'

4Ji))y4 ca)e to this art of the country +hen he +as 1 an' +as so loneso)e at .oberly that hefelt he +oul' e6ire if he staye' there a )onth He &ne+ one )an in :ansas City, Hugh Harlston,chief cler& for the 'ivision engineer of the .issouri Pacific here

4Co)e over,4 sai' .r Harlston 4!7ll get a ob for you4

#he frien' stuc& to his +or& "n' to'ay .r Harlston is one of .r Aynn7s right=han' )en in theerson Co)any

*oung Aynn staye' +ith the .issouri Pacific until $ctober 191@, +hen he entere' the accounting'eart)ent of the Bell #elehone Co)any He 'eci'e' his e'ucation in Aouisiana ha' not beensufficient, so he +ent to both the :ansas City -chool of Aa+ an' the night school in the ol' CentralHigh -chool buil'ing, alternating his nights bet+een the t+o institutions

#he telehone co)any sent hi) to its -t Aouis office in 1912 but, once there, he )isse' his la+school+or& an' his :ansas City frien's -o he resigne' his osition an' returne' to :ansas City He

+ent into the ublic accounting business for hi)self an' ha' goo' success in it #he year 1913 sa+t+o great events in his life, his )arriage to 5rie'a Prill, a :ansas City girl, in $ctober of that year, an'his a')ission to the state bar of .issouri Dece)ber 31

!n January 191K, he +ent +ith -)ith G Bro'ie, accountants, an' re)aine' +ith the) until .ay191, +hen a turn of events )a'e hi) oin forces +ith - erson, foun'er of the Co)any thatbears his na)e to'ay

75



.r Aynn ha' 'one so)e accounting +or& for H " #ho)son, general )anager of theerson fir), an' ha' been sent to Aouisiana to investigate a fire loss that ha' occurre' there !nthose +ays, he ha' for)e' his first connection +ith the erson office

.r #ho)son 'ie', an' shortly after+ar's .r erson calle' .r Aynn into a Conference !tconcerne' the Aouisiana )atter an' a roosition un'er +hich .r Aynn +oul' enter the office to

hel settle various affairs on +hich he an' .r #ho)son ha' been best oste'

.r erson li&e' the +ay .r Aynn han'le' hi)self an' astonishe' the young )an co)letelyby offering hi) .r #ho)son7s lace as )anager of the erson Co)any

4But he +as 00 years ol' an' ! a) only 20,4 .r Aynn ointe' out 4! +oul' li&e to have a chanceat the osition an' ! thin& ! coul' han'le it to your satisfaction, but +on7t the 'iscreancy in the agesof .r #ho)son an' )e be a sort of a han'icaO4

4Don7t you +orry on that score,4 .r erson relie' 4#hats )y loo&out an' ! +ill atten' to itDo you +ant a chance at this osition or 'on7t youO4

4! 'o,4 .r Aynn sai', an' too& it

#he young )an ha' a fairly Herculean tas& before hi) Here, at 20, he +as as&e' to ta&e over thee6ecutive +or& of a )an 00 He +as as&e' to assu)e the )anage)ent of a business, +hich at that ti)eha' reache' one )illion 'ollars a year He +as as&e' to beco)e the hea' of an office of forty or fiftyerson an' &ne+ there 'oubtless +oul' be so)e feeling in the )in's of so)e of the) because he ha'been calle' in fro) the outsi'e for this ri>e osition

.r Aynn +or&e' 'ay an' night for a long ti)e #he +ar +as at han' an' con'itions in general +ere uset But he lo+e' a+ay an' reache' success at the en' of the furro+

$ne 'ay .r erson calle' .r Aynn into his office

4! +ant to have a tal& +ith you,4 the ol'er )an tol' the younger 4!) getting along to+ar' that

ti)e of life +hen ! shoul' li&e to ta&e things a little bit easier *ouve been retty )uch in charge ofthe )anage)ent of this business for ?uite a ti)e an' you &no+ ho+ it shoul' be run Do you thin&you coul' ta&e over the e6ecutive 'etail altogetherO4

4! coul' try har',4 sai' .r Aynn

4"ll right, that7s all ! +ant,4 relie' .r erson 4%o+, there is this )atter of your salary !s itsatisfactory to youO4

4*es, sir4

4Well, it isn7t to )e !) going to raise it to +hat ! thin& you7re +orth "n' besi'es, you +ill get aco))ission on the a)ount of business 'one4

.r erson 'i' not )ention the a)ount of the salary increase he ha' in )in', but +hen .rAynn foun' out +hat it +as he +as stunne' He +as getting )oney that 'o+n in Aouisiana he +oul'n7thave believe' e6iste' His co))ission a''e' to the figure nicely #he business that touches three)illion 'ollars a year no+ is robably the only )illion='ollar business in :ansas City that is 'irecte' bya )an only 32 years ol' He loo&s only 32, but those years have seen hi) un'ergoing an intensivecourse of stu'y an' rearation to+ar' bettering hi)self, an' it is +i'ely &no+ in :ansas Citybusiness circles ho+ +ell he has 'one it

.r Aynns success see)s 'ue ri)arily to the fact that +hen he has foun' a )atter ahea' of hi)to be con?uere', he has buc&le' 'o+n to it, attac&e' it full force, an' refuse' to say ?uit until he +assitting on to of it #hat is the +ay he )a'e a success in the +orl' of recreation in golf, for instance,

+hich he 'eci'e' +as to be his chief a)use)ent an' +hich he 'eter)ine' he +oul' lay +ell or not atall

76



His boyhoo' in Aouisiana ha' asse' +ithout hi) &no+ing there +as such a ga)e as golf Butfour years ago, after he ha' establishe' his business career an' ha' got to a lace +here he coul' loo&aroun' an' thin& of a asti)e, he consi'ere' golf an' 'eter)ine' to be as e6ert as ossible at it

#he average beginner +oul' have bought a set of clubs, foun' hi)self a genial co)anion an'gone out to a ublic lin&s to 4'ub4 his +ay aroun' an' learn the ga)e by the si)le rule of s+ing an'

hit, s+ing an' )iss .r Aynn ha' other i'eas about the )atter He oine' the .ission Hills (olf Club,bought 'rivers, )i'irons, brassies, )ashies an' utters, an' ut hi)self in the han's of Joseh.atthe+s, .ission Hills golf rofessional

4#each )e this ga)e,4 he tol' .atthe+s 4! +ant to learn it fro) the botto) u an' to learn itright4

#he result +as that .r Aynn robably never has )a'e an incorrect golf shot in his life (olfers +ill laugh at this an' say the )an isn7t born +ho 'oesnt hoo& an' slice an' to shots fro) ti)e toti)e, but the oint is that .r Aynn +as un'er co)etent instruction fro) the start an' in a short ti)e)a'e hi)self one of the best golf layers of :ansas City

He +as runner=u to Ja)es %ugent for the .ission Hills cha)ionshi last year an' +ent tothe ne6t to se)i=final roun' for the city cha)ionshi at the .ea'o+ Aa&e Club this year, beingbeaten by Henry Dec&er, last year7s titlehol'er, in the closest &in' of a )atch, 2 'o+n an' ! to lay

$f the lan' on the -outh -i'e ac?uire' by .r Aynn, forty=nine an' a half acres are in the areaboun'e' by .ichigan an' $live, -i6ty=fourth -treet an' .eyer Boulevar', +hile t+o an' a half acresare bet+een -i6ty=thir' an' -i6ty=fourth streets, (arfiel' an' ucli' avenues fifty=t+o acres in all #helan' is value' conservatively at L1@@,@@@ .r Aynn says he bought it to rotect his ho)e at 00@Broo&lyn "venue He lans to buil' a golf course on it, an' a golf rofessional alrea'y has outline'nine holes that can be laye'

.r Aynn says he has ust four rules for success<

1 Har' +or&2 Honesty

3 Whatever you 'o, 'o +ell

K Preare yourself for the future

4#he rules 'o not have to be e6laine',4 he says, s, blue=eye', clear=co)le6ione', +ell='resse',he sits behin' his 'es& an' ans+ers a visitors ?uestions 4! have trie' to follo+ the) the best ! coul'an', in a''ition, .r erson is the i'eal tye of a )an for a young )an to be associate' +ith Hehele' )e beyon' all i)agination

4#he first an' thir' rules, inas)uch as they 'eal +ith the )anner of +or&ing, )ay be consi'ere'

together Peole )ay thin& they are +or&ing as har' as they ossibly can, yet they )ay be 'oing it all +ith their )uscles an' little +ith their hea's, an' +on'ering +hy they 'o not get results

4#he honesty rule is all i)ortant !f a erson 'oes not he+ straight to the )ar&, he +ill fin'hi)self trie' u or falling behin' the fiel' before the race is half over Aet everyone thin& of you,4#hat )an +ill al+ays give )e a s?uare 'eal4 #hat is one of the greatest assets a erson can have

4When ! say, 7Preare yourself for the future,7 that7s ust +hat ! )ean #ry to get so you coul'u) in an' fi the ob of the )an ahea' of you ! +asnt getting )uch fun out of life in the 'ays +hen! +as going to t+o 'ifferent night schools at the sa)e ti)e, but it ai' )e in the en'4

.r Aynn )a'e a little tal& to his e)loyees the other 'ay that sho+e' the) ho+ he +ante' the)to +or& for hi) an', inci'entally, e)bo'ie' a fine set of instructions for +or&ers in any office

4Dont ta&e anything for grante',4 he tol' the) 4When a letter or a telegra) or any bit of

77



Li-e Close to Nature

His rivate office in the " Aong buil'ing breathes financial stability, a )assive +alnut office hung +ith heavy 'raeries in the )anner of ast 'eca'es #he bal' )an behin' the heavy 'es& is bron>e'fro) ersistent living out'oors Aife close to nature is art of his cree' His face is so sensitive that youhar'ly notice the s?uare a+ #here is nothing about hi) to suort the buil'ing tye

Here is no or'inary case of a )an 'evote' to his church, serving on church boar's an' having the)inister out for 'inner .r Aynn belongs to no churchK #hrough his years of siritual searching, heatten'e' )any churches of )any cree's

#he scoe of his activities i)lies that he is one of the busiest e6ecutives in this art of the nite'-tates 5ro) this intensely ractical life he ta&es ti)e for )e'itation, conte)lates the )eanings ofhu)anity in the vast sche)e of things $ut of these )e'itations an' years of Bible rea'ing an' rea'ingfro) other religions, he has 'eveloe' his aroach to the Christian hilosohy He 'iscusses it freely,but not in a +ay that is easy for a visitor to un'erstan' -uerficially, you can say it is +rae' u +iththe hysical an' )ental si'e of 'aily living close to nature #o this +riter, it suggests a return to thesi)licity of Christianity in earlier ti)es +hen eole +orshie' in the forest #he e6ercises +hich he

ta&es out'oors 8breathing, tensing an' rela6ing e6ercises )ay have been suggeste' by his rea'ing of$riental religions #his line of stu'y starte' +ith a boo& by -tanley Jones, the fa)ily )issionary in

"sia

.ost :ansas Citians have 'riven ast the 1@@=acre Aynn estate +hich lies bet+een -i6ty=thir'-treet, .eyer Boulevar', the Paseo an' Prosect 5or years eole have )entione' it in connection

+ith his nine=hole golf course #he golf course +as aban'one' so)e years ago Beyon' the fences an'the shelter of 'ense foliage lie a forest, orchar's, an' vineyar's #his is Ja)es J Aynns out'oor retreatfro) early sring to late fall He stays close to the orchar's fro) the early flo+ering ti)e to the seasonof harvest an' glo+s over the oortunity to give a+ay fruits !n the forest are so)e 2,@@@ finehar'+oo' trees +hich ante'ate the encroach)ent of :ansas City Winters he sen's all ossible ti)e

in -outhern California +here he can continue to live out'oors #his is the tye of life .r Aynn )anages to fin' in the )i'st of the business hurly burly While he

is no)inally vacationing in California, he 'ashes bac& an' forth to business )eetings an' the largeconventions of lu)ber)en or auto)obile 'ealers, the )en of the fiel's +here he oerates +ithinsurance His business for the lu)ber in'ustry has )ultilie' itself )any ti)es to hol' the ran& oflargest recirocal fire e6change in any in'ustry in the +orl' His so)e+hat si)ilar tye of recirocalinsurance for ")erican .otor car 'ealers is not far behin', an' +ithin the last eighteen )onths, helaunche' a ne+ stoc& Co)any +ith full coverage for )otor car o+ners !t aroache' the )illion'ollar )ar& its first year an' aears to be going far beyon' in 1901

#his )an absorbe' +ith things of the -irit is a very active oil)an His oerations srea' overso)e 20,@@@ acres of leases in !llinois, :ansas, $&laho)a, an' #e6as 5inancially oil is the largestenterrise +ith a gross inco)e fro) +ells that no+ average aroun' t+o )illion 'ollars a year !n theio (ran' valley of #e6as, he is a large gro+er of citrus fruits +ith 0@@ acres of graefruit an' orangegroves "s a result of the free>e last January there +ill be no fruit fro) the area for t+o years But ingoo' ti)es the inco)e fro) 0@@ acres has run as high as a half )illion 'ollars a year

" railroa' ob brought hi) to :ansas City an' he is a railroa' )an to'ay, one of the s)all grouof .i'=Westerners +ho )ove' to gain control of the :ansas City -outhern an' Aouisiana an'

"r&ansas railroa's fro) eastern interests an' to lo'ge the hea'?uarters fir)ly in :ansas City He is aBan&er, a very large stoc&hol'er, an' chair)an of the e6ecutive co))ittee of the nion %ationalBan&

K ere : !ust tell the reader that a2asi did tell Mr* .o'ler that he 'as a &ollo'er o& ara!hansa ogananda, &ounder o& the Sel&-ealiation.ello'shi( 8hurh* 6ut Mr* .o'ler dee!ed it 'ise not to (u"lish that in&or!ation "eause o& (ast un&a)ora"le (u"liit in that sa!e ne's(a(erso!e t'ent or !ore ears earlier*

79



"n' this is the )an siritually a&in to ancient rohets .en of a slant only a sha'e 'ifferent fro)his ca)e out of the 'esert to 'enounce the slen'or an' +ealth of Babylon

#he business rise of Ji))y Aynn is one of the sensational ")erican success stories, yet 'ifferentfro) )ost 5ro) the beginning his talents have been carrie' by a eculiarly sensitive hu)an being, one

+ho coul' never bear the thought of any )an7s ill +ill

#he years Ji))y Aynn +or&e' for the .issouri Pacific ailroa' +ere unusual for one thing Whenobs +ere har' to get, there +as al+ays a station +ho +ante' hi) He starte' at the "rchibal' stationin school ti)e, s+eeing out an' &eeing freight house in or'er for L2@@ a )onth "t fourteen,gra'uating fro) gra))ar school, he ha' a ob at the .angha) railroa' station an' )a'e his boar'an' roo) 'oing chores at his cousin7s hotel

His first life a)bition +as fi6e' on the gla)orous office of 'ivision -uerinten'ent, a life goal thathe never achieve' #he )ost i)ressive figure he &ne+ +as W C .orse, the 'ivision -uerinten'ent!n a rivate car, this stern but +ar)hearte' in'ivi'ual of &nitte' eyebro+s travele' u an' 'o+n theline Whenever another station agent as&e' for Ji))y at higher +ages, .orse gru)ble' that he +astoo young an' al+ays let hi) go #hat +as the +ay he +ent to $a& i'ge for a te)orary ob at L30@@

a )onth

5ro) there he )ove' on to 5erri'ay, the city an' 'ivision oint, at a re)ar&able L3@@ a )onth When there +as a secon' oening, he got the ob fro) his ol'er brother +ho )arrie' on the strengthof it -lac&ening business force' a cutbac& an' Ji))y insiste' that he +as footloose an' the one +hoshoul' go " traveling au'itor for the roa' +as ?uic& to reco))en' hi) to a frien' +ith the . : G

# railroa' at .oberly, .o, an' that turne' out to be the high roa' to :ansas City

Ho)esic& can be a terrible thing for anyone .ore than )ost teenagers, Ji))y Aynn 'een'e' onthe +ar)th an' goo' feeling of hu)an relations "t .oberly, he +as lost in a +orl' of ol' eole, ol')en at the office an' t+o ol' +o)en +ho rente' hi) a roo) $ne of these +o)en struggle' +ithbelate' )usic lessons an' ha))ere' a+ay on the iano until all hours of the night #hen she resente'

Ji))y7s alar) cloc& that +ent off early in the )orning "n' so he foun' the ob in :ansas City, +or&ing for the chief cler& to the .issouri Pacific 'ivision engineer #his chief cler& +as a )an he ha'&no+n bac& in Aouisiana 5ro) that -un'ay of his arrival in :ansas City, he felt that he +as a)ongfrien's Within a little )ore than seven years, he +as to be the general )anager of the big un'er+ritingCo)any, secon' only to - erson hi)self

/e Caugt on 0ast

Pro)otions ca)e fast He +as e)loye' on the .issouri Pacific in :ansas City as an assistant au'itor!n less than a )onth, the au'itor +as transferre' an' a frightene' 1=year=ol' Ji))y Aynn han'le' theau'itor7s ob He learne' it by 'oing the +or& an' after that, he +as not afrai' of ne+ obs But the)ain the)e of the seven years +as e'ucation He starte' fro) a ublic school e'ucation that ha' beencut off in the )i''le of the ninth gra'e "bout a year an' a half after, he ca)e to :ansas City, thisyoung assistant lante' the i'ea of getting a legal e'ucation at the :ansas City school of la+

#he la+ school e6acte' Ji))y Aynn7s ro)ise to )a&e u the high school e'ucation that he ha')isse' He carrie' his full la+ school course an' high school subects at the sa)e ti)e Within a year,he a''e' a corresoon'ence course in accountine to the loa' He soa&e' u e'ucation in three 'ifferentfiel's by night an' hel' a full ti)e ob by 'ay "t 21, before he ha' co)lete' his la+ course, he +asa')itte' to the bar By that ti)e, he ha' stee' u to an assistant in the fir) of -)ith G Bro'ie,Certifie' Public "ccountants Without such ite)s as getting a high school e'ucation an' going throughla+ school, Ji))y Aynns accounting e'ucation alone +oul' have been a ro'igious un'erta&ing

#+o local accountants offere' night courses to the correson'ence school stu'ents an' Ji))ytoo& the) $n his o+n, he rea' everything in accounting he coul' fin' an' +or&e' all the roble)sn'er the rules of the state boar', nobo'y coul' beco)e a Certifie' Public "ccountant before the age

80



of 20 Aong before that age, Ji))y Aynn +as han'ling involve', to=brac&et accounting obs for -)ithG Bro'ie When he +as 2K, he asse' the state e6a)ination +ith the highest gra'e on recor' to thatti)e Confronte' +ith such evi'ence, the boar' +aive' the age rule an' gave hi) his CP" certificateat 2K By that ti)e, he ha' a 2@ ercent interest in the fir) !t +as 'uring this erio' of high ressuree'ucation that Ji))y Aynn )et an' courte' .iss 5rie'a Josehine Prill of :ansas City #hey +ere

)arrie' in $ctober 1913 "long +ith the urge to lease everybo'y, Ji))y Aynn see)s to have beenborn +ith unusual curiosity !t +as in his nature to loo& for the e6lanations of everything 5or acurious in'ivi'ual, accounting can be an a'venture 5igures tell the story of a business, ho+ it oeratesan' +hat )a&es it tic& !n :ansas City, young Aynn +as assigne' to accounting +or& for the -erson n'er+riting Co)any an' the Au)ber)en7s "lliance, +hich it serve' !n Chicago an' -tAouis, he au'ite' other recirocal insurance e6changes #he figures +ere business e'ucation

Training under .pperson

#housan's of :ansas Citians in a younger generation have seen oil aintings of - erson, thebig, bal' )an of the 'ar& )ustache !n other years, :ansas City &ne+ hi) as the -irit of gaiety, thelea'er of the erson )instrels, the club)an, goo' co)anion an' the frien' of visiting stage

celebrities "t this office, he +as all business, out+ar'ly stern an' given to unusual +or& habits His'ay starte' aroun' four in the afternoon an' sel'o) en'e' until )i'night His thoroughness +as alegen' When he starte' robing into a case of fire loss, he sent all night on it, refusing to give athought to anything else #here is an illustrative story of the night a scrub+o)an gathere' u all therecor's of a case +hich he ha' srea' out on the floor aroun' hi) an' erson neither hear' norsa+ #he ne6t 'ay there +as a frantic search for the recor's When so)ebo'y thought of as&ing thescrub +o)an, she sai', 4$h, yes, ! gathere' a lot of stuff off the floor, t+o sac&s full4 .en fro) theoffice sent )any hours in the city 'u) before )ost of the recor's +ere returne' to the filesCircu)stances brought together the boyish Ji))y Aynn an' the +eighty erson Aynn +as assigne'to au'it the affairs of a burne'=out .ississii )ill +hich haene' to be a case that ha' articularlyconcerne' - erson He searche' through the volu)inous file an' )a'e a oint of ans+ering all

the ?uestions that ha' been raise' His au'it reveale' the clear )otive for arson erson sho+e'that he +as i)resse' !t haene' at a critical ti)e Death too& % " #ho)son, the un'er+ritingco)any7s general )anager, an' erson +as li&e a )an +ho ha' ust lost his right han' He calle'on Aynn to straighten out so)e of his ersonal affairs, then offere' hi) the ob of treasurer in theCo)any Aynn refuse' Aate at night, +hile he +or&e' over the boo&s in his office, Ji))y Aynn felterson7s eyes on hi), an' fro) ti)e to ti)e, he hear' the +or's, 4! +ish you +eren7t so young4

Bid -or /is Talents

$ut of the situation ca)e the offer of the to ob of general )anager "t the age of 2K, an' barelyarrive' at the -tatus of CP", Ji))y Aynn ha' the e6erience of co)eting o+ers bi''ing for hi)

erson starte' +ith an offer of L0,@@@@@ a year an' +or&e' it u to an arrange)ent that accounte'to 112,@@@ #he salary +as so rece'ent=sha&ing that Aynn +as s+orn to secrecy an' it has been asecret to this ti)e 5re' " -)ith, hea' of the accounting fir), countere' by offering Aynn fullartnershi +hich +as robably +orth )ore than erson7s L12,@@@ !t +asn7t the salary that tie'the scales but oortunity erson so&e of his age an' the chance to ta&e full resonsibility +ithina very fe+ years

#he oortunity turne' out to be greater than Ji))y Aynn &ne+, an' also far )ore recarious #he hoe of so)e 'ay ta&ing over full )anage)ent for erson en'e' in 1921 erson 'eci'e' tosell He +as ill an' fearful that so)ething +oul' occur to 'estroy the value of his business He +ante'to ut his affairs in or'er " frantic Ji))y Aynn roose' that he shoul' buy the business hi)selferson state' the very obvious fact, 4*ou 'ont have the )oney4

!n his later years, -+inney, hea' of the 5irst %ational Ban&, tal&e' about Ji))y Aynn as his%o ! e6a)le of a ris& loan that ro'uce' great results -+inney elaborate' +ith the enthusias) of a

81



Ra8asi as Accountant

aasi faile' to tell .r 5o+ler that +hen he too& the C P" e6a)ination an' sit 'o+n at the table setu for that urose,

#here +as a young )an in front of )e +ho +as rea'ing an' re=rea'ing the ?uestions #heschool ha' given us a 'ay to ans+er the ?uestions ! rea' the e6a)ination aers 'uring the)orning hours "fter lunch, ! began ans+ering the ?uestions #hat young )an loo&e' u at)e an' as&e', 4What are you 'oingO4 ! ans+ere', 45illing in the e6a)ination aers4 #he)an e6clai)e', 4(osh, ho+ can you fill those in alrea'y ! can7t even absorb one ?uestionyet4 !n three hours, ! ha' fille' in all the ans+ers #hat )an +as so 'isguste' to note ho+fast ! ha' ans+ere' all the ?uestions, he u)e' fro) his chair, thre+ the ?uestionnaire in'isgust, an' +al&e' out saying, !7ll never )a&e it4

.r Aynn gra'uate' +ith highest honors, +inning several scholarshis an' other ri>es

When .r Aynn returne' to visit his arents, his greatest ob an' satisfaction +as to see his)other run to+ar's hi) +ith outstretche' ar)s an' envelo hi) +ith her love ecalling this )entalicture of his )other brought tears to his eyes His father often rou'ly reeate' to the other )e)bersof the fa)ily, 4Ji))y ai' us bac& for his &ee4

.r Aynn ha' a tre)en'ous )e)ory, esecially for nu)erical figures He coul' a'' a long colu)nof figures ust as fast as assing a encil u the line of figures

%arriage

During his la+ school, .r Aynn )et 1=year=ol' 5rie'a Prill on a blin' 'ate He an' his frien' )et thegirls in a ar& 5rie'a +as staying in a convent at the ti)e #hey +ere )arrie' shortly after+ar's in

$ctober, 1913 He tol' )e that she 'i' not &no+ house&eeing or coo&ing an' they live' on ste+e'to)atoes

Within a year of their )arriage she suffere' a )aor oeration, +hich revente' her fro) havingchil'ren -he continue' to be both )entally an' hysically un+ell .r Aynns social osition gre+, butsociety 'i' not accet 5rie'a into their circles, an' this 'eely e)bittere' her .r Aynn 'i' not atten')any social functions to avoi' e)barrass)ent fro) her actions -he +oul' have such violent fits ofealousy if either )an, +o)an, or chil' loo&e' at hi) Her actions cause' hi) )uch )ental agony

.r Aynn al+ays rovi'e' her +ith all the lu6ury befitting his osition #he years 'i' not i)roveher )ental or hysical con'ition !n ti)e, she beca)e a be'ri''en atient, but she +oul' not go to a'octor or have one co)e to see her for fear that the hysician +oul' oison her, nor +oul' she have arivate nurse for that reason

.r Aynn ha' to hire ractical nurses or %egro )ai's to loo& after her nee's -he +as so har' onthe hire' hel 5or the least )ista&e she +oul' fire the) an' .r Aynn ha' to tal& the) into staying byoffering higher +ages an' other benefits #hey )ostly staye' because he +as so goo' to the) He +asal+ays &in' to an' consi'erate of her, but 'i' not allo+ her actions to ruin his chances in business !nfact, it )a'e hi) concentrate all the )ore on his business an' 'eter)ination in siritual ursuits

.r Aynn as a young )an +as &no+n as a financial +i>ar' an' a )an of great business ability -tillhe retaine' the sensitive, &in'=hearte' gentleness of little Ji))y He ha' the erseverance an' sta)inaan' asiration of the youthful Ji))y at K@ n'erlying his +hole nature +as a very 'ee=seate'siritual asiration to fin' so)ething that +oul' give hi) soul satisfaction fro) +ithin !n his searchfor &no+le'ge he atten'e' churches of 'ifferent 'eno)inations, but never oine' one, nor 'i' heaffiliate hi)self +ith clubs or lo'ges He later tol' )e, 4! coul' not un'erstan', if there is but one(o', +hy are there so )any 'ifferent religions #here )ust be so)e tangible +ay of fin'ing that one

83



(o'4

He rea' the Bible but coul' not fin' its hi''en truth He rea' -tanley Jones7 boo& an' theBhagava' (ita, but they 'i' not give hi) the satisfaction +hich he sought !n the course of his searchbefore he )et Para)hansa *oganan'a, he too& lessons fro) a Hin'u, a Dr (yani, +ho +as lecturingin :ansas City 5rie'a also +as intereste' an' she too stu'ie' +ith hi) #he coule ha' Dr (yani visit

at their resi'ence $ne 'ay, +hile he +as rea'ing to 5rie'a, she )o)entarily +ent into a rage an' lost)ental control Dr (yani, frightene', left, an' they never contacte' hi) again Because of .r Aynn7sconnection +ith Dr (yani, .r Aynn receive' very unfavorable ublicity in the :ansas City -tarne+saer But this 'i' not 'iscourage .r Aynn7s continue' search for so)eone +ho +oul' give hi)the siritual co)fort he so 'eserately nee'e' an' sincerely +ante' .r Aynn later relate' to )e his)eeting +ith .aster

0irst %eeting 'it %aster

!n the )i''le of January 1932, ! +as 'riving to )y office as usual, but on the +ay ! sa+ alarge billboar' +ith the icture of .aster ! thought, 4What a stri&ing +o)anF4 Aater ! sa+

a'vertise' in the ne+saer a Hin'u by the na)e of -+a)i *oganan'a +ho +as givinglectures in to+n ! i))e'iately ha' an inner urge to go an' hear hi) #he first night 5rie'aoose' )y going, but the secon' night ! )a'e u )y )in' +hether she obecte' or not, !

+as going to atten' those lectures -he +oul' not let )e go alone so she an' her frien'acco)anie' )e We hear' all his lectures an' too& his classes !t +asn7t until after ! ha' seen.aster a fe+ ti)es on the latfor) 'i' ! reali>e that the +o)ans icture ! ha' seen on thebillboar' an' the saint that stoo' before )e +ere one an' the sa)e erson ! coul'nt sit or&ee )y bo'y an' esecially )y han's still, not even for a )o)ent $n the secon' night ofthe class, ! beca)e a+are that ! +as sitting uright, )y sine straight an' ! +as absolutely)otionless ! loo&e' 'o+n at )y han's, +hich +ere so restlessly )oving before an' +hich

+ere no+ erfectly still .arveling at this great stillness ! felt, ! loo&e' u at the latfor) !

sa+ surroun'ing .aster7s bo'y a beautiful blue light +hich al)ost enveloe' the +hole stage! notice' .aster loo&ing 'o+n at )e s)iling ! never felt that restlessness since ! &ne+ ! ha'foun' the ath that gave )e inner eace an' satisfaction an' that ! ha' foun' that so)ethingtangible ! +as see&ing, )y guru

#his brings to )in' +hat -ister (yana)ata tol' aasi one 'ay +hen she +as tal&ing +ith .rAynn< 4! a) so hay ! foun' )y guru before ! got involve' +ith so)e other Hin'u teacher, forrobably ! +oul' have accete' hi) as )y guru an' )isse' )y true guru4 aasi ans+ere', 4-ister, !follo+e' a Hin'u teacher before ! )et .aster *et ! &ne+ .aster +as )y (uru *ou too +oul' have'one the sa)e, for the soul &no+s the 'ifference bet+een an or'inary teacher an' a guru4

#hough 5rie'a Aynn hear' all .aster7s lectures an' ractice' the 5ourth Aesson for a fe+ years,.r Aynn +as receiving so )uch siritually, she felt .aster +as ta&ing hi) a+ay fro) her -he turne'against .aster an' +oul' violently react to the very )ention of his na)e #herefore, .r Aynn silentlycontacte' .aster an' stoe' )entioning his na)e before her ! ?uote an e6cert fro) .asters letterto aasi<

5B"* 2, 1930 E ! so&e to Divine .other about .rs Aynn, but ! fin' .otherneutral -he &no+s +hat she +ants of 5rie'a

#he revious ublicity about his association +ith a Hin'u teacher ha' ha' 'isastrous reactions +ith aasi7s business associates Coule' +ith 5rie'a7s change of )in' an' heart, .r Aynn feare'

)ore ublicity +oul' har) his business an' above all His Divine association +ith his (uru $ne 'ay,he ut this roble) before .aster Para)hansai encourage' .r Aynn to follo+ Hi) silently an' not

84



to )ention His na)e au'ibly, saying that He +oul' 'o everything in His o+er to rotect .r Aynnssecrecy an' osition .aster often sai', 4-t Aynn is in business for (o' an' nothing )ust co)ebet+een his acco)lishing his )ission on earth4

#he secret +as &et so +ell that 5rie'a Aynn 'i' not &no+ he +as still connecte' +ith .aster or-5 until the 190K ublicity of the )illion='ollar gift to -elf=eali>ation 5ello+shi at +hich ti)e

ugene Aynn reorte' to aasi an' )yself, 4"unt 5rie'a sure raise' the roof over the ublicity ofyour giving that )oney to -54 aasi never +ent bac& to :ansas City after that inci'ent, thereforesaring hi) of 5rie'a7s verbal reactions ugene Aynn loo&e' after his "unt 5rie'a7s ersonal co)fort'uring aasis absence an' )a'e his erio'ic reorts to his ncle Ji))y

aasi heartily laughe' at ugenes trouble' e6ression over his "unts antics an' bitter tongue,an' +as hay at last to have so)eone else ut u +ith it, after so )any years of atient sufferingfro) 5rie'as tongue=lashings .aster often reeate' this sage utterance fro) his lectures, 4" +o)an

+ith a three=inch tongue can &ill a )an si6=feet tall4 .aster also sai' that -t Aynn attracte' such a +ifein or'er to learn atience #hrough .asters grace an' his 8aasis o+n siritual 'evelo)ent, ! &no+aasi gra'uate' fro) this lesson before leaving this )un'ane +orl'

!n %ove)ber 1931, .aster +as ca)aigning in -alt Aa&e City, tah Dr (yani ha' ust finishe'giving lectures in that city an' +as still there +hen .aster arrive' During his conversation +ith.aster, Dr (yani )entione' .r Aynns na)e .aster sai', 4When ! hear' that na)e, )y heartleae' +ith oy ! felt ! +ill have to )eet this soul so)e 'ay4

.asters ca)aign +as sche'ule' for January 19, 1932 in :ansas "fter a fe+ nights of lectures,.aster sent his secretary, .iss .ar?uart, to see .r Aynn at his office .r Aynn i))e'iately as&e' herfor an intervie+ +ith .aster, +hich +as an6iously given .iss .ar?uart reorte', to .asters leasure,that .r Aynn +as atten'ing His lectures an' +ante' to tal& +ith .aster .aster an' .r Aynn, +hobeca)e his rincile 'iscile, )et again for the first ti)e after incarnations of searation .asterinstantaneously recogni>e' His long lost frien' of the 'istant ast ! ?uote a letter fro) .aster to

aasi !t is the sa)e one that is in aasi7s )e)orial issue of the Bast=West )aga>ine but +ithoute'iting, ust as .aster +rote it to -t Aynn

5B"* 2, 1932 E Blesse' $ne< #his is to bless you on behalf of Babai, Aahiri.ahasaya, -ri *u&tes+ari an' )yself, for saving our +or& at a very critical erio' of itse6istence #here is reoicing in the inner +orl', for you have hele' the (reat $nes to chooseyou as #heir lu)inous instru)ent for srea'ing the great e)anciating *ogo'a -atsanga

+or& #he (reat $nes choose +illing an' able )en on earth to 'eliver other )en fro)ignorance an' suffering !n your life, the !))ortal $nes have ut their invisible blessings onyou, +hich far e6cee's the hu)an )ans 'rea)s *es, (o' an' the .asters can e)loy)iracles to create big te)les but that +oul' not change souls But +hen the (reat $nes fin'

a o+erful hu)an soul +hich )a&es an altar of his heart +ith goo'ness an' goo' +or&s, thenthey co)e in hi) an' they are able to +or& through hi) #he (reat $nes love to establish ate)le of -irit in real souls li&e you, that other +is'o)=hungry souls )ay co)e an' feast onthe 'ivine )anna eoice, reoice, reoiceF "n' ! reoice that the -irit has ta&en the flute ofour life to sing the 'ivine song of *ogo'a an' to lure other truant chil'ren bac& to HisHo)e Aet us bla>e a ath to buil' ne+ altars of -elf=eali>ation all over ")erica7s rincilecities an' 'rive out 'ar&ness )ore an' )ore Aet us leave siritual footrints in this 'rea)life, that others )ay follo+ to get out of the be'la) of )isery=)a&ing night)ares, on to theregions +here 'ar& 'rea)s 'are not trea', +here (o's fountain of bliss lays in ever=ne+

+ays to enthrall an' satisfy all the 'esires an' fancies of the hu)an soul With 'eeest lovean' covenant to be your frien' forever until crossing the ortals of finitu'e an' incarnations,

+e reach the boso) of the $ne 5rien' an' beco)e one +ith Hi) *ou are the Hin'u yogi ofthe Hi)alayas sent as an ")erican rince .ahara *ogi to light the la) of *ogo'a in thegroing hearts of our Western brothers eoice, reoice, reoiceF Boun'less blessings,

85



ery sincerely yours, E -+a)i *oganan'a

.r Aynn +ent to .aster7s aart)ent every 'ay to )e'itate +ith Hi) before going to his office !t +as on one of those occasions that .aster rivately gave .r Aynn the :riya .aster touche' .r

Aynn7s forehea' to sho+ hi) the light $f this, aasi sai', 4! felt that )y +hole face +as flushe' +ithlight4 .r Aynn too& fresh )il&, crea) an' butter, fruit an' vegetables as an offering at his guru7s feetaasi ha' very fon' )e)ories of these ecstatic reunions of the soul +ith -irit an' the Divine (uru

#rans)itter

ven before )eeting .aster, .r Aynn7s o+n inner siritual conviction influence' hi) to self=control an' celibacy .any years later, .r Aynn tol' )e,

Before ! )et .aster, ! +as an e6tre)ely nervous erson, an' ! +oul' get irritate' at the 'roof the hat Woul' you believe to loo& at )e to'ay that ! +as so ?uic&=te)ere' that +hen !laye' golf an' )isse' hitting the ball, ! +oul' thro+ )y stic&s u the tree an' +al& a+ay !

very sel'o) lay golf no+, for ! 'on7t see any sense in running after a little ball ! have

.aster7s e6ercises to &ee fit

-o)e of .r Aynn7s business associates tol' )e that he +as an e6cellent golfer

"fter .aster co)lete' his :ansas City ca)aign, he ca)e bac& to .t Washington an' oyfullytol' us about the +on'erful soul he ha' )et, +ho ha' ro)ise' to hel our +or& an' co)e as soon ashe coul' !t +as still 'uring the 'eression, an' the ban& +ith +hich .r Aynn +as associate', faile'Plus, his o+n business 'ifficulties revente' hi) fro) &eeing his ro)ise to visit us soon .asters'isaoint)ent +as &eenly felt #he reason he +as an6ious for .r Aynn to co)e to .t Washington

+as he &ne+ -atans subtle +ays an' he +ante' to fir)ly establish .r Aynn on this ath so -atancoul' not 'ivert his attention else+here .r Aynn +oul' +rite that he +as co)ing on a certain 'ate

.aster +oul' get .t Washington cleane' fro) to to botto) in rearation for his co)ing ! ?uotee6certs fro) t+o of .asters letters to .r Aynn regar'ing this subect

."* 1@, 1932 E ! +ill be an6iously +aiting for your co)ing, even though ! +ill have to +aitanother )onth *es, +e +ill )eet at .t Washington an' 'elve together in the 'eth ofsilence

%$.B 2, 1932 E ! have an un'ying 'esire to sho+ you this lace even if it is for a 'ay We all have been +aiting for you al)ost a year atiently an' an6iously ! +ant you to see thelace +ith +hich you are cooerating Please let us &no+ !t +oul' be +on'erful if you coul')e'itate +ith )e for even a coule of 'ays for long erio's, +ithout the business

environ)ent #his +oul' be for your higher reali>ation an' ! have to give you so)ething)ore, so)e ne+ )etho's to sti)ulate your siritual gro+th

Ra8asi1s 0irst /ead5uarters ,isit

#his +ee&=by=+ee& 'elay e6ten'e' to al)ost a year .aster finally got the telegra) announcing .rAynn7s actual arrival .asters oys &ne+ no boun's ! ?uote .r Aynns telegra)<

J"%"* 3, 1933 *our letter receive' ! a) so hay you +ill save several 'ays for )e +ithout interference +ith your -anta Barbara ca)aign .y lans are to arrive at the -outhernPacific -tation at <0@ a) -atur'ay )orning

J"%"* E 1K, 1933 E #hat lan is 'efinite an' you )ay e6ect )e at that ti)e

86



.aster got everyone on the ob, to clean everything fro) to+er to the base)ent .aster hi)self +as outsi'e +ith his broo) s+eeing the si'e+al&s verything ha' to be neat as a in, .asterre)in'ing us once again, 4.r Aynn is a very clean an' articular )an4 .aster brought all the varietiesof fruits, vegetables, nuts, an' 'ates in rearation for .r Aynn7s arrival

$n January 1K, 1933, .aster ubilantly 'earte' for the station to )eet .r Aynn an' bring hi) to

his siritual ho)e for the first ti)e .aster +as so rou' to sho+ .t Washington to hi) .aster)ove' out of his o+n be'roo) an' slet in the library, so .r Aynn coul' use his ?uarters an' be'He coo&e' for hi) an' +atche' over hi) li&e a 'oting )other #his +as .r Aynn7s first visit, but byfar not his last

$ne evening on this first visit, .aster ca)e into )y roo) an' as&e' )e for a nee'le an' threa' !gave it to hi) He sat an' starte' to se+, )en'ing .r Aynn7s bro&en susen'ers ! offere' to se+ forhi), but oh no, he +ante' to se+ the) hi)self .aster sai', 4Just thin&, a )an of his )eans to go

+ithout li&e this He never buys anything for hi)self He +ears these bro&en an' +orn susen'ers thatare falling aart #his is the true sirit of renunciation4

.r Aynn ca)e to .t Washington +ithout &no+ing that he ha' a slight col' !t increase' 'uring

the fe+ 'ays that he +as visiting us .aster gave hi) so)e gargle to use !n the rocess of gargling, hecoughe' an' so)e of the li?ui' sotte' .asters bathroo) ceiling Do you &no+, .aster +oul' notlet us +ash it offF -+eet senti)ental (urui +ante' to &ee it there as a )e)ento of his little boy7s first

visit When .r Aynn returne' to :ansas City, he +as very ill, an' +on'ere' +hy he shoul' have acol' in a siritual environ)ent He, li&e so )any others, thought that because they ta&e u the ath ofyoga an' (o'=contact, all 'iseases, troubles, an' roble)s +oul' 'isaear #his +as .aster7s ans+eran' ! ?uote an e6cert of .aster7s letter to .r Aynn<

5B"* ;, 1932 E When you ha' the col' ! got alar)e' #hat is +hy ! +as giving yougargles ! felt the col' ha' alrea'y settle' in your lungs ! sa+ that )any ti)es +hen you ca)ehere ! 'i' not +ant to tell you for fear it +oul' cause you to beco)e +orse ! &no+ you ha'

to go through this but it +oul' have been )uch +orse if His !))ortal "r)s ha'n7t rotecte'you ! &no+ if you ha' staye' a little longer, you +oul' not have e6erience' this trouble, but! &no+ )y (urus rotecte' you all the ti)e ! +ill insist henceforth you eat )ore nuts,raisons, runes, an' figs an' insist you use a thic&er ca)els hair overcoat 'uring +inter an'on ourneys *ogis have to guar' against col's an' esecially col's traveling 'o+n+ar' to thelungs #his e6erience, though, has left you +ea& *ou +ill soon forget !t ca)e to you tosho+ the changelessness of hu)an life an' that you shoul' ever cling to (o' no )atter ho+)uch -atan an' &ar)a try your atience

Ra8asi Calls SR0 /o*e

!t +as natural for .r Aynn to call his :ansas City resi'ence ho)e, but as he began to co)e )oreoften an' enoy the siritual at)oshere of .t Washington an' ncinitas, an' also felt one of our'ivine fa)ily, to .asters 'elight, .r Aynn began to refer to us here as ho)e an' his :ansas Citya''ress as resi'ence

"fter .aster )et his guru, -ri *u&tes+ari tol' hi), 4(o an' fin' yourself a siritual bo'y guar'4Ai&e+ise, .aster +ishe' .r Aynn to create a siritual at)oshere in :ansas City by starting a)e'itation grou un'er his lea'ershi .aster thought this +oul' &ee .r Aynn in tune +ith Hi) an'at the sa)e )e hel others, therefore continuing the lin& +ith the hea'?uarters an' +ith hi) ! ?uotee6certs of .asters letter to .r Aynn regar'ing this subect

"P!A 2;, 1932 E ! feel that you shoul' 'irectly or in'irectly &ee in touch +ith this +or& so

that it beco)es a er)anent art of your life ! 'ont thin& 5rie'a coul' obect if you too& ana)eless real interest in the +or& to i)rove yourself an' hel others i)rove

87



.r Aynn +rote to .aster about his )e'itation grou later<

J"%"* 193 E #hey are so earnest an' stea'fast .e'itation co)es first +ith the) an'they are e6an'ing rai'ly Wait until you see the) again an' you +ill reali>e Blessings an'

'eeest love fro) your little boy J J Aynn

.r Aynn )e'itate' every +ee& +ith the grou of si6 or seven

#here +ere three )en in atten'ance, .r Aynn tol' )e later

! continue' )e'itating +ith the) as long as there +as at least one )an resent, but +hen he leftan' the +o)en the)selves ha' 'ifferences a)ongst the)selves, ! coul' not e6ose )yself to that forfear of unfavorable ublicity again ! 'roe' out gra'ually an' the center naturally 'issolve' of itself

!n the )eanti)e, a young )an in .r Aynns office beca)e an ar'ent -elf=eali>ation 5ello+shifollo+er an' still is .r Aynn continue' to )e'itate +ith the boy every -atur'ay afternoon in hisoffice an' siritually gui'e' #e' to the last

Crist*as

Christ)as +as al+ays a very gay an' oyous event for .aster, esecially if -t Aynn +as here tocelebrate +ith hi) ! ?uote a fe+ e6certs of .asters letters to -t Aynn<

%$.B 12, 1932 E Please let )e &no+ i))e'iately We have a +on'erful )e'itationcelebration 'uring Christ)as holi'ays ! sincerely hoe you can co)e, even if it is ust for afe+ 'ays *our business +oul' be close' 'uring that ti)e !t shall lease )e )ost if you canco)e for Christ)as !t +oul' )a&e it our haiest Christ)as

DC.B 29, 193K E Blesse' $ne, ! &no+ ho+ you +ishe' to be +ith us on Christ)as'ay an' ho+ +e +ishe' you coul' have been +ith us ! too +oul' 'o anything to be +ith you,but +hen you co)e, +e +ill )a&e a Christ)as 'ay of our o+n Half of the 'ay +e +ill)e'itate together an' bring Christ on the altar of our 'evotion

%$.B 2;, 1939 E Christ)as still re)ains a oyous sot in )y heart, but that too isartially eclise' +ith the rosect of your co)ing hi''en in the clou's of 'oubts #hin&

+hen ! ca)e bac& fro) !n'ia ho+ eagerly you ca)e to Aos "ngeles to celebrate Christ)as !un'erstan' business entangle)ents, but as long as +e feel you are very eager to be +ith us, +eare hay Christ)as co)es only once a year We +ait 30 'ays for it We all have beenshoing for you an' loo&ing aroun' for things throughout the year +ith the eager

e6ectation of enoying Christ)as an' gifts +ith you -o this is the Christ)as sychology #hat7s all ! have to say to you %othing )ore !f you )iss Christ)as, +hich loo&s li&e it, theChrist)as tree +ill be +aiting until you can co)e, so lease co)e soon, as near Christ)as asossible that +e )ay enoy Christ)as +ith you Dece)ber 2K is -un'ay Christ)as is.on'ay ven office +or& )ay be susen'e' an' Christ)as celebrate' only if so)ebo'ythin&s +orth+hile #hats all ! have to say to you %othing )ore

DC.B 2, 19K3 E !n site of +riting on )y boo&, ! +ent to )e'itate ! thought ! +oul' never co)e out of ecstasy $ur )e'itation 'ay +as eight hours long Jesus ca)e threeti)es, once as a chil' in the crib of light, an' as a young )an, an' t+ice as He loo&e' beforecrucifi6ion !n His eyes tre)ble' the co))an' of the niverse !t +as a +on'erful

)e'itation an' ! felt your sirit +ith )e %e6t 'ay the 'inner +as +on'erful We )isse' youbut the Christ)as tree is +aiting for you When are you co)ingO ! an' -anta Claus are +aiting

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-t Aynn coul' not sen' as )any Christ)ases as he 'esire' He e6laine' to .aster an' )e, 4!tis the en' of the year, a ti)e +hen )y business is closing its boo&s, an' ! shoul' be there to gui'e it,but )ost of all, the violent scenes 5rie'a enacte' uon hearing of )y leaving her at that ti)e is very'istressing4 ! ?uote e6certs of .aster7s letter to -t Aynn<

DC.B 2K, 193; E .ost Blesse' Belove' Aittle $ne< ! 'i'nt &no+ ! +oul' )issanyone so )uch as ! 'o )y little $ne "s +e are all ust about rea'y to go to )e'itation, !have to +rite this letter to loosen the ent=u feeling #he Christ)as tree an' everythingsee)s so useless +ithout your bright face 'ivinely areciative of all +e 'o for you ! &no+that 8that +hich cannot be cure' )ust be en'ure' ! a) so sorry, everything see)s li&e ato)b +ithout you Well, ! +ante' a 'ivine frien' an' ! have one, the )ost erfect in you, an'! cannot hel feeling the 'ra)a of co))ingle' hu)an love an' 'ivine love Please forgive)e for feeling this +ay ! 'on7t +ant to a'' to your suffering

.aster 'i' &ee the trees an' ha' a secial Christ)as for -t Aynn +hen he 'i' co)e $ne ti)e

+e ha' to &ee the trees u as late as "ril #he oor trees +ere nothing but s&eletons #here +ere)any ti)es +hen -t Aynn 'i' co)e #here +as great reoicing in .aster7s an' all heartsN elaboraterearations +ere )a'eN gift +raing, 'inner coo&ing, an' so on .aster ha' his o+n tree in his livingroo) He li&e' the +hite=sraye' tree, but the o'or fro) the sray +as too o+erful for such a s)allroo)N thus, that tye of tree +as aban'one' #hereafter, -ailasuta bought the best silver=tie' tree forhis roo) .aster +oul' have us, his i))e'iate 'isciles +ho 'aily serve' hi), co)e to his living roo)to celebrate his ersonal Christ)as -o)eti)es it +as after the 'o+nstairs celebration, but it +as solate that he change' it to having it before going 'o+n to finish coo&ing the Christ)as 'inner

.aster +oul' teasingly say to -t Aynn, 4%o fair ee&ing4 Weather er)itting, -t Aynn +entoutsi'e to +ait for .aster to call hi) in verything in or'er, -t Aynn +as calle' in We +oul' all oinhan's an' )a&e a circle aroun' interloc&e' .aster an' -t Aynn, +al&ing aroun' the) both +hile

singing, 4Jingle Bells4 .aster coul' not carry our ")erican tunes too +ell, but it +as s+eet to +atchhi) sing ust the sa)e "fter that, .aster an' -t Aynn too& a chair near the tree an' +e all sat on thefloor an' began e6changing gifts

-t Aynn +oul' usually give .aster a large su) of )oney as a gift, but in later years ! boughtersonal gifts for -t Aynn to give .aster, things that ! &ne+ -5 or +e coul' not affor' to buy forhi) ! +oul' tell -t Aynn an' he in turn +oul' instruct )e to buy the) for .aster !t lease' (uruiso )uch to receive a ersonal gift fro) his Aittle $ne .oney +as not ersonal enough for it +ent for-5 financial roble)sN ho+ever, -t Aynn gave his usual )oney gift too When -t Aynn receive' giftsof 'ates, nuts, or other eatables, he +oul' give so)e to .aster an' then ass it to all of us to enoy$ur )ouths +ere as busy eating as our han's +ere +ith gifts

.aster ha' a fascination for so)ething ne+, an' )echanical )ove)ents of toys intereste' hi)He coul' not resist buying several toys each Christ)as for his little boy .aster use' to give things that

+ere souvenirs instea' of ractical an' useful gifts We finally convince' hi) that useful gifts can beuse', +hereas souvenirs are ut a+ay an' cant be use' or so)eti)es never loo&e' at again #hereafter,.aster 'elighte' in giving househol' ite)s an' foo's that he thought -t Aynn +oul' enoy using.aster +oul' e6clai) +ith oy +hen he sa+ his gifts being use' +hen he ca)e in to see -t Aynn.aster li&e' giving his gifts last an' &et the best one for the cli)a6

Christ)as 193 +as -t Aynn7s gift of the ncinitas her)itage to .aster an' -5, as +ell as a verylarge su) of )oney to start an !n'ian 5un' .aster often referre' to the 193 Christ)as as his )ost)e)orable one $n this articular 19K Christ)as, .aster gave -t Aynn a little )osaic icture fra)e

+ith ictures of all the .asters, inclu'ing his o+n an' -t Aynns .aster cut each tiny icture an'lace' the) in a ring for)ation +ith -t Aynn in the botto), saying, 4*ou are the last one to for) thisring4 While -t Aynn +as a')iring the gift, .aster continue', 4! cut, aste', an' fi6e' the) all u for

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you ! 'i' everything )yself4 $n the Christ)as tag, .aster +rote, 4When life7s leaves have fallen an'gone, on His eternal Breast our na)es +ill re)ain to srea' His %a)e anon #his one +as )a'e +ithlove7s han' to co))e)orate four souls as one to srea' the )essage of the $ne4 #here are )oreChrist)as tags in a searate file for your leasure

$ne Christ)as )e'itation 'ay, -t Aynn +as sitting on the latfor) ne6t to .aster (urui

su''enly sai', 4! see the beautiful face of Christ4 "l)ost i))e'iately +e hear' a heavy thu' ! loo&e'u to see that -t Aynn ha' fallen off the latfor) an' +as lying )otionless on the floor .aster +entto hi) an' after +hat see)e' a long ti)e brought -t Aynn bac& to outer consciousness .aster latertol' )e, 4He 'i' not +ant to co)e bac& !t too& )e a +hile to coa6 hi) bac&4

.aster as&e' so)e of the boys to hel -t Aynn into a chair near the) an' ha' Dr Ae+is an'another boy on each si'e of -t Aynn to hol' on to each of his ar)s so he +oul' not fall again " short

+hile later, -t Aynn got u an' sho+e' the au'ience by fle6ing his ar) )uscles that he +as erfectly +ell an' strong He 'i' not +ant eole to thin& he ha' fainte' He e6laine' to )e later +hat ha'haene', 4Hearing .aster say that he sa+ Christ, ! +ante' to see hi) too, so ! touche' .aster7s ar)an' that is all ! out+ar'ly re)e)ber4

"nother ti)e +hile -t Aynn +as outsi'e +aiting on .aster7s orch to co)e in for .aster7s rivatecelebration, he +as facing the hall+ay +hen .aster ca)e +al&ing to+ar's his 'oor -t Aynn sa+,

+al&ing behin' .aster, Babai s)iling

#hough aasi 'i' not co)e for .aster7s last )e'itation 'ay, he +as able to atten' the lastChrist)as of 1901 +ith our Belove' (urui ! ha' never seen aasi so 'e)onstrative over receiving agift as he +as +ith the 'ia)on' cross .aster gave hi) that year -t Aynn receive' so )uch siritualbenefit fro) atten'ing these Christ)as )e'itations an' the celebrations that ! &no+ he )a'e a secialeffort to atten' +henever ossible

%aster1s India Trip

"s early as 193K, .aster began hinting in letters to .r Aynn that he +ishe' to go to !n'ia to see his.aster an' earthly father But the ull beca)e stronger in 1930 .asters letters can best say +hat +asin his heart, so ! ?uote so)e here

."CH 1,1930 E .y father first hele' )e to establish the first *ogo'a -at=-anga in a)u' hut in Calcutta He sacrifice' his greatest love for )e an' finance' )e to co)e to

")erica to start the +or& in Boston He has +aite' fifteen years to see )e He regularlyre?uests that ! go to see hi) before he asses on He has been )ore than a father He hasbeen a heler to )y (urus +or&, an' an unselfish guar'ian angel " letter has no+ co)efro) hi) He is 'ying of ol' age an' +ishes to see )e )uch above everything else ! 'i' notay attention to this too )uch, but as ! sat in -irit, ! have felt the calling voice of )y .asterHe is haunting )e 'ay 8an' night an' )y )in' has fle' fro) here an' is hovering over!n'ia #his is not senti)ent, Belove' $ne, for ! hear the voice of .aster saying, 4%o useco)ing to !n'ia +hen )ine an' your father7s bo'y are gone *ou )ust co)e .a&e thesure)e effort4 #his is very sacre' to )e an' to you ! a) 'elivering this )essage of .asteran' (o' for there is no one in the +orl' at +hose 'oor ! coul' stan' +ith this aeal !&no+ .aster has overstaye' his san of life for us ! +ant to +rite the biograhy of )y.aster an' ! 'on7t &no+ his birth'ay ! +ill try to secure all these things for he +ill never

+rite the) #here is a chance if ! ersua'e hi) he )ight agree to stay longer He has +aite'fourteen years atiently for )e !f it is (o'7s +ill that ! safely co)e bac& here, ! +ill +rite thelife of .aster, Aahiri .ahasaya, Babai #his is absolutely necessary in or'er to give so)e soli'foun'ation to this +or& an' the stu'ents #housan's are +aiting hungrily for this, as theyhave +aite' for the +ee&ly lessons, but ! have +ritten only half "n' because ! lac& 'ates an'

verification of )y +riting, ! have not ublishe' anything (o' er)itting you to )a&e this

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tri ossible, it +ill fulfill the greatest nee' of the +or& an' )y hearts haunting 'esire ! canonly rint facts, so +hat ! +rite ! +ill rea' to )y .aster an' to a fe+ other 'isciles of Aahiri.ahasaya Dear Belove', you +ho have save' .aster7s an' )y +or& fro) co)leteruination, +on7t you once again be a re'ee)er of this situation in !n'ia, an' save )y soulfro) the horror of fourteen years of +aiting !f there ha' been a chance, ! +oul' have begge'

fro) 'oor to 'oor, rather than trouble you, but by the co))an' of )y inner soul, ! co)e atyour 'oor Please turn )e not a+ay Aet )e acco)lish this great tas& 'uring this little sanof )y life ! too have overstaye', for ! +ante' to be in the !nfinite +ithout the 'elusion of abo'y, but ! have re)aine' on earth for the +or& an' to )eet you, a long e6ecte' co)ra'eof )ine !f you 'o that for )e, )any ti)es (o' +ill give the )oney bac& to you an'so)ething )ore of recious heaven, for the souls of )y father an' .aster an' of )anyothers are involve'

-t Aynn ca)e to .t Washington in .arch 1930 !t +as at that ti)e he consente' to finance.asters tri to !n'ia an' +orl' tour .aster7s oy &ne+ no boun's for at last, he +as going to see hisBelove' .aster an' 5ather an' blesse' !n'ia again

"P!A 1@, 1930 E Blesse' $ne< Please &ee the 'ate of )y 'earture very confi'ential forreason ! +ill tell you later ! lan to go fro) %e+ *or& on June 10 ! have )a'e reservationson the Bre)en, ! +ill not believe it until ! a) on the boat ! 'are not thin& ho+ for fourteenyears (o' has frustrate' all )y atte)ts to go to !n'ia ! +oul' have given every enny tooor !n'ia an' retire' in the ungles but ! thought of ")erica )ore an' sen' everything forher #hin& ho+ blest you +ill be +hen Babai, Aahiri .ahasaya, an' )y .aster +ill see on thefoun'ation stone your glorious na)e, an' Babai7s rohesy +ill be fulfille', 4#here are )any

+oul'=be saints in ")erica,4 an' an ")erican saint +ill an' is buil'ing a te)le in benighte'oor !n'ia, to sho+ his areciation to the .asters

"(-# 1, 1930 E 5our 'ays lie before )e an' !n'ia an' you, 'ear soul, ai' for thisi)ortant art of )y life ! renounce' all .y earthly father sent )e to ")erica, an' thin&,you are the very 'ear soul +ho sent )e to !n'ia ! a) entering there in triu)h, this ennilessrenunciate a'et of (o'

"(-# 2K, 1930 E (urui 'i'n7t +rite to )e in Portsai', but his letter +as +aiting for )ehere in Bo)bay He +rote, 4! a) overoye', e6tre)ely 'elighte' that you are here ! +illsoothe )y eyes seeing you an' your 'isciles .otor fro) Calcutta to -era)ore an' ta&e )e

+ith you4 %o+ this is very unusual for hi) to e6ress such oy an' re?uest He is so austerean' un'e)onstrative an' never har'ly re?uests anything for hi)self, an' thin&, you havegiven all this oy not only to )e but to (urui 8an' )y earthly father Calcutta is )a&ing big

rearations to receive us at Calcutta Harah -tation

"(-# 2K, 1930 E ! coul' s+ee !n'ia7s eole #hey are all clinging to )e every+here,an' ! a) teaching all the ti)e !t is a gran' feeling for these eole are not fic&le in theirsearch for (o'

-P#.B 19, 1930 E When ! arrive' at Calcutta, +e coul'n7t get out of the train ! +ishe' you coul' have been +ith us .ahara of :asi)ba>ar, son of the late .ahara +hohele' )e start anchi -chool +as a)ongst hun're's +ho receive' us +ith countlessgarlan's, olls oyce, an' a fleet of autos an' )otorcycles ! a) busy fro) )orning till oneo7cloc& at night Here, the )etho' of teaching has to be 'ifferent, though they 'on7t ay, yet

they +oul' be of greatest hel in soli'ifying this +or& all over !n'ia With ulti)ate ossibilityof a great follo+ing an' bac&ing, ! a) boun' han' an' foot +ith the love of eole,

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initiations, songs, an' )e'itations $h, such siritual at)oshere ! so long )isse' Day an'night asses +ith (o' an' (o'=hungry souls, cro+'s, flo+ers, an' fruits of all 'escritionsare resente' to )e Peole fro) all arts of Bengal an' !n'ia are ouring in ! got invitationfro) .a'ras alrea'y to sea&, but ! have enough +or& in 'ear Bengal

$C#$B 9, 1930 E isite' the great .aster -ri *u&tes+ari first ti)e We fle+ into eachothers ar)s an' re)aine' in sobs for a long ti)e ! a) staying at father7s 5ather an' !e)brace' each other an' re)aine' that +ay for a long ti)e crying, such oy you have given !have sho+n your icture to .aster an' all his thousan's of blessings are being sent to youthrough the air #hey all &no+ +hat you have )eant to )e an' the +or& an' ! a) sen'ingyou a souvenir fro) .aster

.aster stoe' at :ansas City to see -t Aynn on his +ay to %e+ *or& to boar' the shi, 6re!en -t Aynn financially hele' to save )any situations in !n'ia as +ell as .t Washington 'uring .astersabsence ! ?uote so)e e6certs to -t Aynn regar'ing .aster7s return tri to Aos "ngeles<

"(-# 2K, 193 E -ea letter aboar' the %al'ers E #o J J Aynn, .ount Washingtonstates, Aos "ngeles, California n'less blessings fro) !n'ia7s *ogo'ans for stabili>inganchi 5inally sailing to+ar's 'earest you an' .t Washington an' all Deeest oy an' love,-+a)i

"(-# 3@, 193 E .ost Blesse' Belove' $ne %o+ you can7t believe that ! a) hea'ingto+ar's our ")erica -ee)s so )any )iles of +ater the oor shi has to s+i) over, butany+ay +e are nearing to+ar's you +hen ! shall see your 'earest face +ith chil'=li&e s)ilebea)ing +ith the halo of (o' .y earthly father +ho has been al)ost li&e )y guru alrea'yasse' on His life +as tre)bling in the balance +hen ! left Ho+ can ! than& you, (o's )ostbelove' instru)ent, for being such in'escribably goo' to )e an' the +or&O

"(-# 3@, 193 E Hurray, co)ing ho)e, reaching Aon'on

-P#.B 11, 193 E -tarting fro) Aon'on $ctober the 3r', reaching %e+ *or&$ctober the ;th, then t+o 'ays in Boston, then to :ansas City, then to .t Washington

" telegra) -t Aynn +rote to .aster in Aon'on<

-P#.B 193 E #his ti)e your lan'ing in ")erica fin's a host of 'evotees eagerlya+aiting !n'ia7s grace in your e)bo'i)ent With hearts throbbing in 'eeest love an''evotion for you an' the .asters, an' blen'ing +ith your heart into oneness +ith the love of

Divine .other With e6lo'ing oy an' un)easurable gratitu'e +e greet an' +elco)e youan' hu)bly offer our rayers of than&fulness for your Divine blessings an' love Hurry to us.t Washington an' :ansas City Devotees J J Aynn

.aster to aasi<

$C#$B 193 E ! +ill let you &no+ a little ahea' +hen ! +ill reach 'ear :ansas City +hichcontains your 'ear saintly self #o be love' by (o' is everything an' you have )y love a''e'to that eretually - *

%$.B 3, 193 E .ost Blesse' Belove' $ne< #his is a short note to let you &no+ that

! a) +aiting +ith in'escribable oy to see you $n %ove)ber 1@, #ues'ay, ! arrive at the Wabash -tation by train %o 3 at K<10 ) #hence ! +ill rocee' to the aart)ent you hire'

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for )e at the Bershire "r)s *ou tol' )e so)e eole +oul' )eet )e at the station an' you +ill be +aiting for )e at the aart)ent ! coul' have reache' :ansas City in the )orning but! 'i'n7t li&e the thought of +aiting until you coul' co)e, so ! chose the afternoon e6ectingthat you coul' )eet )e in the aart)ent on arrival there

#his reunion at :ansas City +as another very )e)orial one for both )aster an' 'iscile .asterthen ca)e to -alt Aa&e City, tah, to )eet a fe+ 'isciles +ho 'rove there to )eet .aster on%ove)ber 1th, 193, an' he 'rove bac& +ith us to Aos "ngeles

!n or'er to avoi' confusion a)ong the na)es, .r Aynn, -t Aynn, an' aasi Jana&anan'a, ! +illuse the na)e aasi e6clusively fro) 193 on

/er*itage Created

Prior to the buil'ing of the her)itage, aasi use' to go to 5lori'a on occasions to get a+ay fro)business an' retreats !t +as .asters intention to have a lace of our o+n so aasi coul' co)e tocontinue his siritual rogress, instea' of going to 5lori'a .aster starte' loo&ing for beach roerty in

July 193K an' +rote to aasi about 'ifferent laces he foun', but there +as one in articular that.aster li&e' above all other roerty ! ?uote e6certs fro) .asters letters to aasi

JA* 193K E ! co)be' fro) -anta Barbara to -an Diego for a lace, co)bination of hill an'ocean, +here stu'ents an' ! can refresh ourselves on +ee&en's an' co)e to A" -atur'aysan' -un'ays for occasional services, it is one of the rarest laces li&e our .t Washington !nncinitas ! foun' a four an' half acre of rivate beach +ith a hill an' +on'erful trees forL10,@@@@@, no buil'ings

-P#.B 0, 193K E ! +rote you about the )ost e6clusive, +ithout restrictions on a &nollinto the sea @@ feet frontage, four an' half acres, +ith a circle of big ine trees an'

ucalytus, 1@@ )iles fro) A" Blesse' $ne, this is the cheaest an' the best beach !t coul'be fence' off !t is far enough fro) the high+ay to eli)inate noise

-P#.B 11, 193K E ! forgot to tell you the county has a stair+ay to the beach !t is theonly available roerty !t +oul' be an i'eal retreat, a co)bination of sea an' )ountains,trees, beach, an' co)lete seclusion *ou are right #he house at Dana Point is unsuitable-till it cant co)are to ncinitas roerty -o)e 'ay ! &no+ (o' +ill free you fro) yourbusiness entangle)ents an' you +ill be able to co)e here to ncinitas an' be on that sacre'hill in co)lete ecstasy +ith (o'

%$.B , 193K E ! a) rincially thin&ing of your future retire)ent lace in (o'

!n the )eanti)e .aster receive' a letter fro) -ri *u&tes+ari hinting that he +as conte)latingleaving his bo'y an' +ishe' to see hi) once )ore aasi ro)ise' to finance .aster7s tri to !n'ia

#herefore, the search for beach roerty +as aban'one' te)orarily Ho+ever, before .aster left forhis !n'ia tri in June 1930, he instructe' )e, saying, 4When .r Aynn co)es, sho+ hi) the ncinitasbeach roerty4 .aster also +rote t+o instructive notes to )e enroute ! ?uote<

J% 0, 1930 E Dear Du< When .r Aynn co)es to .t Washington, ta&e hi) to ncinitas +ith -ister (yana)ata, you, an' 5aye, an' Castillo 'riving 5irst let -ister ri'e in bac& +ith.r Aynn an' you an' 5aye in front Co)ing bac& you ri'e in bac& +ith .r Aynn an' -isteran' 5aye in front Co)ing bac& tal& to hi) about the great retreat +e coul' )a&e for hi) an'

)y retire)ent

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5ro) Calcutta, !n'ia, $C#$B 11, 1930 E Dear Du< Positively sho+ .r Aynn the laceon the beach hill in ncinitas When he ac?uires that lan', )y last +ish +ill be fulfille' #hereis no lace li&e it #ry your ut)ost - *

aasi only visite' .t Washington four or five ti)es 'uring .asters absence #he secon' ti)e he

ca)e on .arch 1;, 193 ! as&e' if he +oul' li&e to 'rive 'o+n to ncinitas to see the roerty of +hich .aster +as so fon' His affir)ative ans+er )a'e us very hay !t +as lunchti)e +hen +ereache' ncinitas an' +e ha' a icnic un'er the ine trees that for)e' the circle .aster +rote aboutto aasi We +ere hay to see that aasi +as satisfie' +ith the environ)ent He ran u an' 'o+nthe beach li&e a hay chil' During the 'rive bac&, he tol' us that he +oul' consent to urchase theroerty as a surrise gift for .asters return, it is nee'less to e6ress the oy +e felt in his 'ecisionBefore aasi left for :ansas City, he charge' )e to negotiate +ith the real estate bro&er an' to infor)hi) of the results We +ere so hay that aasi +as getting .aster7s )uch love' ncinitas roertythat +e 'i' not 'are as& for )ore, but nevertheless +e 'i' ray that he +oul' +ant to buil' a housebefore .aster7s return We 'ance' +ith oy +hen +e receive' a letter 'irecting us to loo& into theossibility of buil'ing a house before .aster arrive' in $ctober or %ove)ber ofl93 !t +as also

gratifying to learn by aasi7s gesture that his )in' ran in the sa)e channel as ours to fulfill .aster7s)ental creation long ago in his .aster7s -ri *u&tes+ari7s her)itage in !n'ia0 aasi as&e' if .asterha' any articular lans in )in' for a retreat an' ! ?uote aasis letter to )e regar'ing a her)itage

JA* 193 E Di' -+a)ii 'ra+ any lans for a her)itage or a house for the beach roertyO!t +oul' be an a''e' oy to have the beach roerty co)lete' an' furnishe' rea'y for use

+hen -+a)ii arrives ! +oul' enoy ta&ing hi) to ncinitas, 'rive u to the her)itage, ta&e aloo& at the fence, the house, an' the beach, an' let hi) +on'er +hat ha' haene' He

+oul' &no+ even before +e reache' the roerty but the hysical reaction +oul' overoy all Will 'iscuss )ore +ith you +hen ! a) ne6t in .t Washington J J Aynn

We &ne+ of no lans, but offere' our suggestions for +e ha' carefully thought it all out #hecircle of trees ha' )a'e such an i)ression in .asters )in' that it 'i' not occur to us to have thehouse any+here else We ha'n7t lanne' to cut any of the) to )a&e roo) for a house #herefore, +e

+ere going to buil' in the circle of trees +here the ocean coul' not be seen fro) the lo+er level We +oul' have to buil' a t+o=story house .aster7s an' aasi7s be'roo) an' bath coul' be locate' tohave an ocean vie+ on the secon' floor $n the groun' floor +e coul' have a living roo) an' 'iningroo), &itchen, an' a 'or)itory +ith bath for the )en or la'y 'isciles, an' of course, a garage aasia'vise' )e to fin' a goo' architect an' start the retreat as soon as ossible !t +as alrea'y June an'.aster +as 'ue to arrive in %ove)ber

-ister an' ! +ent to Hay+ar' Au)ber Co)anyN they 'irecte' us to .r 5rye He as&e' )e?uestions of +hat +e +ante' an' ! gave hi) the 'irections +here the roerty +as locate' When .r

5rye ca)e bac& fro) his insection of the location, he +as char)e' an' enthusiastic He tol' )e thatthe )inute he stoo' on the cliff, he sa+ in his )in's eye a long ra)bling one=story buil'ing on thee'ge of the cliff, an' a''e' that his artistic sense coul' not see us buil' a t+o=story house in the circleBut one ro+ of trees nearest the oceanfront +oul' have to be sacrifice' to carry out the lan

! +rote to aasi the )essage an' he i))e'iately gave the 4go ahea'4 signal an' at the sa)e ti)e,he e6resse' his 'esire as to the si>e of be'roo) an' bathroo) he +ante' an' thought .aster shoul'have the sa)e, or +hatever +e thought .aster +oul' li&e best He also as&e' if there +as so)eone inour grou +ho &ne+ interior 'ecorating +ho coul' +or& +ith .r 5rye ! suggeste' .rs .ary B asshe ha' the ability an' +as e6erience' He +as satisfie' +ith the choice an' tal&e' +ith her When heha' finishe' sea&ing +ith .rs B, he relate' her lans to )e -he lanne' to )a&e the +hole interior

0 :n "utobiograhy of a *ogi , Sri u+tes'ar sas to ogananda, %e)ertheless ou 'ere not &ull 'ith !e* our o"2etion &ores !e tore!ar+ that in our !ental "a+ground ou 'ere reating three organiations, one 'as a sl)an retreat on a (lain, another on a hillto(, and athird " the oean*%

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a relica of a -t 5rances )onastery, +ith ol' bric&s or anti?ue laster an' +oo'+or&, ceiling bea)s toloo& li&e it +as +or)=eaten, an' a''e' that she +ante' L10,@@@@@ in a'vance, not for herself but soshe coul' have free reign to buy articles nee'e' as she ca)e across the) to carry out her lans Hisans+er to her +as that he +oul' ta&e care of it hi)self He then as&e' if ! +oul' relieve hi) by ta&ingit over ! +arne' hi) that ! 'i' not have the &no+le'ge about such things but ! +as +illing to try, for !

&ne+ 'efinitely .aster +oul' not li&e .rs B7s lan of )a&ing a ne+ buil'ing loo& ol', an' a''e', !ha' been +ith .aster long enough to &no+ his li&es an' 'isli&es in things, an' that ! felt ! coul' select +hat he +oul' li&e

! +or&e' continuously +ith .r 5rye, lanning to )a&e .aster an' aasi7s ?uarters searate'fro) the 'isciles, +ith a &itchen an' 'ining roo) large enough for a great 'eal of coo&ing an'serving, an' a living roo) in +hich +e +oul' be able to hol' services, be'roo)s that +oul' hol' t+obe's, an' an aart)ent over the garage "s a result, the buil'ing got larger by the 'ay #he reli)inariesover, .r 5rye finishe' the lans +ithout any further 'elay, an' turne' the) over to )e for insectionan' 'iscussion +ith aasi !t +as thought best to buil' the garage aart)ent first, so that +hen +e

+ent over to insect the +or& an' if aasi ca)e, he +oul' have a lace to stay overnight #he garagean' aart)ent +ere starte' in )i' "ugust 193N slo+ly but surely the her)itage gre+ an' so 'i' our

oy #he )onths rolle' by an' %ove)ber +as getting closer an' .aster7s ho)eco)ing

We ha' cautione' the contractors an' +or&ers not to give any infor)ation regar'ing the buil'ingas +e 'i' not +ant the ress to ublici>e anything about the her)itage, for +e feare' so)e stu'ent orfrien' +oul' rea' about it an' sen' the cliing to .aster an' hence ruin our +on'erful surrise Wealso too& the .t Washington househol' )e)bers into our confi'ence an' as&e' the) to &ee oursecret, +hich they 'i'

When +e sa+ that the her)itage +as not going to be finishe' before .aster arrive', +e as&e' .r5rye to at least co)lete .asters an' aasi7s ?uarters first We lanne' to furnish an' have it rea'yfor their use an' ta&e .aster there a fe+ 'ays after his ho)eco)ing We +ere fearful lest the secret

+oul' lea& out before +e coul' get hi) there While the buil'ing +as still in rocess, .r 5rye

intro'uce' )e to a .r oy Werthei)er, an interior 'ecorator He furnishe' lans for the furniture.r Werthei)er too& )e to the Aos "ngeles furniture factory for the selection of the furniture #henaasi )a'e a secial tri to arove of the furniture selecte' He gave his consent an' also hele' toselect the caret, 'raes, an' )atching srea's, the uholstery for chairs an' 'avenorts aasi gave)e free reign to finish furnishing the her)itage

! +as busy getting the linens, ceiling lights, floor an' other la)s, utensils, silver+are, )attresses,blan&ets, an' yogi be's, an' atten'ing to all the other 'etails, even 'o+n to a se+ing &it 5inally the'ate for .aster7s arrival +as set, .aster )a&ing arrange)ents for our 'river to 'rive 5aye, irginia,Aani an' )yself to )eet hi) in -alt Aa&e City, tah, %ove)ber 1, 193, an' 'rive bac& ho)e +ithhi)

#he follo+ing night +e +ere sitting on the floor in front of .aster in his hotel roo), absorbe' inhis every +or' of those recious )o)ents Aoo&ing straight into )y eyes, .aster su''enly as&e',4Di' you sho+ .r Aynn the ncinitas roerty li&e ! as&e' youO4 #he girls coul' not &ee a sole)nface before hi) #hey gave so)e rete6t or another an' one by one, they left )e alone to face .aster7sall=seeing eye He )ore forcibly reeate' the ?uestion ! 'i' not +ant to say no an' ! 'i' not +ant toa')it Divine .other ca)e to )y rescue an' +ithout hesitation ans+ere', 4! +on'er ho+ ! coul'

+hen he +as 'oing so )uch for !n'ia4 He thoughtfully sai', 4#hat is right He 'i' so )uch for!n'ia4 He later tol' )e, 4*our ans+er co)letely foole' )e an' too& )e off guar' an' ! 'is)isse'the thought fro) )y )in'4

We ha' another t+o +ee&s to +ait after .aster7s arrival to .t Washington before his ?uarters +oul' be finishe' We ha' to 'o a lot of lotting for +ays of getting .aster to ncinitas +ithoutarousing his curiosity aasi sai' that he +oul' +ait for our call +hen their ?uarters +oul' be finishe'to co)e He also ha' the i'ea that the ne6t 'ay after his arrival he +oul' as& .aster, saying, 4! have a

95



frien' in Aa Jolla +ho is letting )e use his beach ho)e for a fe+ 'ays While he is gone, ! +oul' li&eyou to go +ith )e4

We also lanne' that 5aye, irginia, .r Wright, an' )yself +ere to 'rive ahea' of .aster7s caran' hi'e in his be'roo) aasi ro)ise' he +oul' not say anything until .aster oene' the 'oor tohis be'roo) an' +e all crie', 4-urrise4 #he lan +as carrie' out .aster, an6ious to lease aasi,

consente' to go +ith hi) Ho+ever, there +as one change ! 'i' not &no+ aasi ha' thoughtfullyas&e' .aster if ! coul' go +ith the) in his car as a re+ar' for )y share in the creation of theher)itage .aster very &in'ly allo+e' )e to go +ith the) We ha' reviously instructe' the +or&ersnot to recogni>e us as +e ca)e into the buil'ing We 'i' not +ant anyone to give us a+ay, at least notuntil the surrise shouts ha' been uttere' #he girls starte' out for ncinitas right after .aster7s an'aasis car left

"s +e aroache' ncinitas, .aster fell aslee When he +o&e, he as&e' Castillo, 4Where are +eO Why 'i' you not sto at ncinitasO ! +ante' to sho+ .r Aynn that lace4 Castillo loo&e' at aasian' )e for an ans+er aasi as&e' .aster, 4Di' you +ant to sto so)e+hereO We can go bac& if youreally +ant to see that lace4 By this ti)e, +e +ere nearing the Aa Jolla unction We turne' an'

starte' bac& for ncinitas "s +e ca)e to -olana Beach +here the her)itage oint can be seen, ! sa+ a +ave of light co)e into .aster7s eyes as he, too, sa+ the buil'ing #he thought crosse' )y )in', 4$h,.aster sees the buil'ing4 But again he i))e'iately close' his eyes He tol' us later the reason forclosing his eyes +as that he 'i' not +ant Divine .other to sho+ hi) )ore "s he close' his eyes, hesai', 4%o, no, .other Don7t tell )e any )ore Aet it be a surrise4

"s +e 'rove into the entrance, .aster sa+ the garage an' aart)ent on one si'e an' a hugebuil'ing still in rocess an' e6clai)e', 4$h, so)ebo'y has bought this for a laygroun' an' isbuil'ing a recreation buil'ing $h, )y lace is gone4 We s)ile' in+ar'ly but sai' nothing #he frontstes +ere not yet built nor +as the living roo) co)lete' #here +ere several heavy lan&s lace' forus to +al& u, aasi hol'ing an' heling .aster by the han' on one si'e an' Castillo on the other an'! +al&ing behin' the) ! coul' see .aster7s s+eet s)iling face loo&ing an' reeate'ly saying to aasi,

4!s this your 'oingsO !s this your 'oingsO4 aasi s)ile' bac& an' to avoi' a 'irect ans+er, sai', 4#his isa big buil'ing4

We 'i' not tarry in the front art of the buil'ing We +ent 'irectly to .aster7s be'roo) "s heoene' the 'oor, four voices shoute', 4-urriseF -urriseF4 "ll .aster coul' say +as, 4.y Aor', this isyour 'oingF4 an' hugge' aasi over an' over again an' blesse' each one of us #his en' of theher)itage +as co)letely furnishe' +ith 'raes, caret, an' other things He +as ta&en to see aasi7sroo)s an' the rest of the inco)lete her)itage an' groun's "s he +al&e', +e tol' hi) the story ofthe birth of the her)itage

We re)aine' for several 'ays, .aster an' aasi in their ?uarters an' +e in the garage aart)ent We hele' .aster coo& in the utility &itchen an' ha' our first )eal together in our ne+ retreat .aster

+ent bac& an' forth several ti)es in Dece)ber before the her)itage +as co)lete' aroun' theDece)ber 22 He +as lease' +ith everything e6cet the living roo) ceiling !n 193 there +as nochoice of colors or style in Celote6 as there are to'ay We coul' not aint it for it +oul' ta&e a+ay theacoustic value an' 'efeat its urose "ll the furniture +as e6actly +hat .aster ha' secretly +ante' for.t Washington When .aster ha' visite' ")elita (alli=Curci7s ho)e in 192, he sa+ an' greatlya')ire' her 'ining table an' chairs #hus, he +as leasantly astonishe' to see one al)ost li&e it in theher)itage 'ining roo) He +oul' often say, 4Won7t surrises ever ceaseF4 aasi also ca)e at that ti)ean' enoye' the her)itage +hile +aiting to go to .t Washingtons Dece)ber 2K all='ay )e'itationan' Dece)ber 20 celebration aasi hele' )e tri) the her)itages first Christ)as tree #he +or&)enha' ut u a large tree +ith outsi'e lights on the groun' at the oint, but the +in' +as so violent +eha' to ta&e it 'o+n .aster ha' also invite' -5 teachers fro) bac& ast to co)e for Christ)as an'

to sho+ the) his surrise gift #he 'ay after Christ)as, +e 'rove to the her)itage to celebrate thesecon' Christ)as an' the gran'est gift .aster ha' ever receive' .aster tol' us that he +ent aroun'

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in a 'a>e for )onthsN he coul' not believe that his 'rea) of an ocean colony ha' been fulfille' ! ?uotea letter .aster +rote to aasi<

%$.B 10, 193 E #he ivory hue has been touche' all over the outsi'e !t loo&s li&e a'rea) retreat #he flooring of the chael roo) loo&s li&e it +ill be co)lete' by the 2Kth

!n'ee' )y +ish for so)ething very nice for you has been fulfille' through us an' as He ise?ually resent in us, He is alrea'y enoying through our 'elight in the 'oll='rea)'+elling bythe blue brine -uch love, such aban'on)ent in (o' as e6resse' through you in theher)itage is the fulfill)ent of )y 'rea)s of )any incarnations -uch hainess is )utualco))union of the saints, as ! +as co)ing fro) the her)itage )any ti)es in the car, the vasts&y ca)e uon )e an' lifte' )y soul an' srea' its consciousness all over 5or a long ti)e !'i' not &no+ )y bo'y +as traveling in the car ! actually beca)e the vast blue s&y

E P *oganan'a

DC.B 10, 193 E ! a) no )ore living in this +orl', but in the e)ire of ternity an'you are )y ive&anan'a, the very sight of you aralyses all activity in the +orl' an' starts the

activity in (o' until all things beco)e (o' (o' gave us ncinitas 'rea) that all )o)entsthere )ay be use' as altars of His Presence Blesse' you are, blesse' +e are as +e arerivilege' to have Heaven=lore at ncinitas here on earth an' also in heaven in the beyon'-o +e )ust be together in -irit no+ an' ever after+ar's .ay our love be on the altar of the!nfinite, Aove ever)oreternal Aove

E P *oganan'a

Ra8asi1s Business 0ace

arly in Dece)ber 193, .aster aointe' )e in charge of caring for aasi7s ersonal nee's, such ascoo&ing an' foo' in general an' ac&ing an' unac&ing his suitcases .aster ha' )a'e )e very

conscious of ho+ )eticulously clean aasi +asN therefore, ! )a'e a secial effort to &ee hisaart)ent sotless at all ti)es "fter the her)itage +as built, aasi loo&e' for+ar' +ith greatanticiation to his visits to ncinitas, not only to get a+ay fro) business but to absorb all the siritual

vibrations fro) .aster an' the +on'erful at)oshere +here .aster create' for his co)fort an'siritual gro+th When he arrive' for one of his visits, his face +oul' be that of a business )an, har'set an' intense, but after a fe+ 'ays at the her)itage, +e coul' see it change into that of a soft, ten'er,an' siritual chil'=li&e face .aster tol' )e that he +oul' +ait a fe+ 'ays to co)e fro) .t

Washington to see aasi to give hi) a chance to lose his business attitu'e an' ta&e on +hat .asteral+ays calle', 4his little boy7s face4

Ra8asi1s 0ood /a(its

$ne or t+o years rior to aasi7s )eeting +ith .aster in 1932, he +as a very heavy )eat eater,inclu'ing all the tri))ings, otatoes, an' gravy ating a +hole loaf of +hite brea' at one )eal +asnot unco))on, or a +hole ca&e or ie to to a )eal +ith a glass of )il& -uch +ere his eating habitsfor this )an of five feet seven inches tall, +eighe' over t+o hun're' oun's He ha' constant col'sNhe coul' not re)ain in a 'raftN all 'oors an' Win'o+s ha' to be close' tightly, his bo'y bun'le' to theears $ne night he +as traveling by train after a heavy )ealN he +as rearing to retire an' in therocess of trying to get into his berth he hear' strangers in the ne6t berth laughingly re)ar& abouthi)self, 4Aisten to that fat grunting =i=g getting into be'4 #his state)ent sun& 'ee into his ri'e,an' he 'eter)ine' right there an' then, he +as going to change his eating habits !))e'iately heloo&e' for 'iet an' health boo&s on the subect an' )a'e a co)lete roun' about face He stoe'

eating all for)s of )eats an' all unnatural s+eets !n the course of his 'iet change, he )et a teacher +ho a'vise' hi) to eat one 'o>en ra+ eggs a 'ay When aasi un'ertoo& a thing, he +ent all the +ay

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He faithfully ate the eggs until he coul' not loo& at an egg any)ore 5or years he +oul'nt touch anegg in any for) $nly in the last year of his life 'i' he eat one coo&e' egg a 'ay He lost the e6cess

+eight very ?uic&ly He re)aine' in the sun an' fresh air in his orchar' an' his sacious la+n until it +as ti)e to go to his office aroun' eleven or noon He ha' learne' a fe+ e6ercises an' he +or&e' atthe) 'iligentlyN even in the +inter )onths, he slet on a artially oene' orch He often tol' )e the

story of ho+ his )ai's loo&e' +hen they ha' to go out on the orch to )a&e his be' u Helaughingly sai', 4#hey +ere so bun'le' +ith clothes that ! coul'n7t see their faces4 He rarely ha'col's !f he felt one +as co)ing on, he 'ran& nothing but straine' graefruit uice He sai' he +oul'get ri' of it in a fe+ 'ays "lthough this )etho' +as contrary to .aster7s theory, he got the results hesought ! ?uote a letter fro) .aster to aasi

"P!A 1@, 19K2 E ! have al+ays )aintaine' that graefruit cuts hleg), but only at a laterstage of the col' !n the earlier state of the col' +hen the 8throat is sore, ra+ graefruit is

very irritating, but of course, if the )in' is e6tre)ely bent on a certain foo' 'uring illness, ifta&en in reasonable ?uantity, it +ill co)e out +ellP *oganan'a

aasi +as also incline' to 'rin& )ore li?ui's than soli' foo's

5B"* 9, 19K@ E !t is best not to 'rin& too )any li?ui's While they vitali>e an'che)icali>e the bo'y they +ill lessen the eristaltic actions of/our sto)ach an' intestines

When soli' foo' goes into the sto)ach an' intestines, the eristaltic )uscles get busy an' +restle +ith the foo' trying to 'igest it, but if only li?ui's are ut into the sto)ach, it 'oesnot struggle as )uch Pul of carrots, etc is very goo' an' better than too )uch uice, forthen the teeth an' the sto)ach all have to +or& #hat is +hy the Aor' )a'e vegetables har'too !n che+ing bones, the 'og &ees the teeth )uscles, saliva 'igestion uices, an' eristaltic)uscles active We are losing the life of )any organs for not enough che+ing ven the cat

lic&s an' che+s )il& before s+allo+ing, +hich +e erroneously 'o +ith insalivating the uices +e 'rin& "ll foo's shoul', +ith e6cetions, 'ue to habit, have te)eratures of nature an'surroun'ing at)oshere to +hich our bo'ies are subect to #hen that foo' roerly vitali>esour bo'yP *oganan'a

aasi +as very strict in his eating an' living habits thereafter, even to the oint of fanaticis) an'being critical of others +ho 'i' not as strictly a'here to any articular goo' habits !f so)eone gave )ea iece of can'y, ie, or ca&e, ! ate it in the sanctuary of )y roo) to avoi' criticis) $ne 'ay hecritici>e' sinless -ister (yana)ata to .aster for 'rin&ing tea .aster, +ho +oul' not a'vocatefanaticis) of any hysical for), ans+ere', 4#hat 'oes not )a&e her less of a saint4 .aster +ent on to

e6lain that 4goo' habits can beco)e ba' habits if +e, un'er certain circu)stances, cannot carry outthe erfor)ance of certain goo' habits, an' allo+ ourselves to beco)e )entally 'isturbe'Disturbance is the evi'ence of loss of self=controlN therefore, the goo' habit beco)es ba' !t is best tobe even=)in'e' an' re)ain oyous an' hay un'er all circu)stances $ne has to be fanatical in onessearch for (o' but +ithout 'isturbances4

aasi +as ?uic& to gras the +is'o) of .asters +or's to correct an' re)ove any critical sirit +ithin hi)self He never critici>e' an/one after that .aster calle' aasi 4his nature boyO4, for aasili&e' to eat his foo' in their natural for) He has tol' )e he never left his roo)s until his intestines

+ere thoroughly cleanse' 5or this, he 'ran& four or five glasses of +ater ust as it ca)e fro) the +aterbottle +ith several 'ros of le)on or li)e uice "fter this, he +ent outsi'e to 'o his e6ercises an' goto the beach "ll through the 'ay, he ate as he felt hunger

#he first thing after his )orning e6ercises, if his citrus fruits +ere in season, he 'ran& several large

98



glasses of straine' graefruit When ! as&e' hi) +hy he 'ran& this uice straine', he e6laine' that ifall the cells of the graefruit ha' not burst in the rocess of uicing that the +hole cell in the sto)ach'i' not 'igest -till later he 'ran& several glasses of orange uice, this +ith the ul !n other seasons,he ha' )elons He +oul' ta&e one hour an' a half to eat half of a +ater)elon cut length+ise He onlyche+e' the uice out of the +ater)elon an' e6ectorate' the ul ! as&e' hi) +hy he 'i' not

s+allo+ the ul too He ans+ere', 4Water)elon is a very cleansing fruit an' so)e eole cant ta&etoo )uch of it4 "fter a short ti)e +hen the +ater)elon ha' 'one its cleansing rocess in thesto)ach, he +oul' voluntarily e6ectorate the +ater)elon

!f he ate a certain foo' that soure' in his sto)ach, aasi ha' the ability to get ri' of it at +ill +ithout any of the other foo's that +ere in the sto)ach co)ing out, e6cet the 'isagreeable one !as&e' .aster ho+ aasi coul' 'o that +ithout being sic& or all the foo' co)ing out fro) the sto)achtoo .aster e6laine' that in !n'ia there are certain yogic e6ercises that one can re)ove any or all artof the foo' fro) the sto)ach at +ill +ithout effort or sic&ness connecte' to it aasi ha' ractice'this e6ercise in his !n'ian incarnation an' it +as no+ natural to hi) in this life4 -till later 'uring the)orning or afternoon, he 'ran& a glass of carrot uice )a'e fresh every 'ay, or a large glass of

vegetable uice +ith ul )a'e in the blen'er +ith a carrot, orange, or ineale uice base, an' a s)all

iece or a)ount of all the 'ifferent vegetables freshly ic&e' fro) the gar'en +ith al)on' or ecana''e', or he 'ran& goats )il& +ith 'ates or honey or cur' )il& )a'e fresh, +ith honey or fresh )alesyru or +hey )a'e +ith ineale uice

When the fruits +ere rie on the trees, he stoo' at the sin& an' ate a +hole )eal of eaches, figs,cheri)oyas, an' )angoes !f the fresh fruits +ere not in season, he ate unsulhere' raisins, figs, an''ates +ith nuts He use' to shi us hun're'=oun' bags of fresh ecans ic&e' fro) the trees helante' +hen he +as a little boy on his )other an' fathers far) in Aouisiana #hey +ere so rich in oil,they burne' li&e a torch, +hich .aster 'elighte' in 'e)onstrating When the co) season +as at han',Bro -arolanan'a +oul' ic&, clean, an' bring the) u ! scrae' it off the cob an' he ate iti))e'iately He &ne+ if the corn ha' been ic&e' ahea' of ti)e of his eating it He +oul' say, 4#his

corn has been ic&e' an hour ago4 ! +oul' ans+er, 4!t has been ust brought u4 ! +oul' in?uire of-arolanan'a an' sure enough he ha' ic&e' the corn ahea' aasi also ate the corn stea)e' on thecob

aasi 'i' not li&e to buy nuts that +ere alrea'y shelle' e6cet those that +ere i)orte' an' coul'not be avoi'e' But 'o)estic nuts ha' to be freehan' in the shell #hey +ere crac&e' as he ate the)He too, li&e .aster, 'i' not li&e sour fruits He use' honey on his berries His only coo&e' )eal +as inthe evening at no secific ti)e, coo&e' +henever he +ante' it !t consiste' of a fe+ lainly coo&e'

vegetables +ith very little salt or butter He 'i' not li&e onions or garlic or eggs or sicy herbs,although he 'i' eat .asters curries an' enoye' the) +ith .asters blessings -o)eti)es ! coo&e't+o )eals, one lain vegetables for aasi an' a ortion coo&e' aart +ith onions an' sices for)yself aasi +oul' naturally s)ell the sicy fragrance an' as& to taste it " s)all serving +as ti)i'ly

lace' before hi) #he results of the taste test usually en'e' by aasi eating all of )y tasty 'ish an' !eating the lain tasteless vegetable "s&ing hi) the ne6t 'ay if he +ante' anything in articular coo&e',he +oul' ans+er, 4%o, ust coo& it your +ay4

aasi li&e' crisy foo's, esecially +ith lain rice He +as a Hin'u +hen it ca)e to eating rice Hecoul' have eaten it three ti)es a 'ay if it ha' been a healthier foo' He 'i' not 'rin& tea an' nevertouche' coffee in his life He tol' )e the reason coffee an' its o'or )a'e hi) ill When he +as a tinyboy, his )other use' to give hi) castor oil in a little coffee, leaving hi) +ith a 'istaste of the s)ell ofcoffee -ince he 'i' not 'rin& +ith his )eals, he li&e' gravies or sauces but they coul' not be thic&ene'

+ith flour or co) starch, but +ith +aterchestnut flour urchase' in a Chinato+n store

He 'i' not eat brea' as a rule but once in a +hile, he li&e' sour'ough brea' or corn tortilla or thin

co) brea' +ith )elte' )il' cheese toaste' in the oven until bro+n or ust )elte' -o)eti)es he ha' ara+ vegetable sala' +ith a ho)e)a'e 'ressing of olive oil, le)on uice, an' so)eti)es blue cheese He

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'i' not li&e to tal& 'uring a )eal for he sai' that the 'inner table +as a lace to eat an' thoroughly)asticate the foo' He che+e' his foo' so +ell it +oul' so)eti)es ta&e hi) fro) one an' a half tot+o hours to eat his )eals He even che+e' li?ui's He never e6resse' +hether he li&e' the coo&e'foo' or not #he only +ay ! &ne+ he li&e' it +as +hen he as&e' for a secon' heling or left it on hislate if he 'i' not, or the ne6t 'ay he +oul' suggest, 4Don7t ut this or that in to'ay4 "fter )any trials

an' errors, ! learne' his li&es an' 'isli&es!t +as entrancing to see .aster an' aasi sitting on the la+n facing each other +ith a large ail of

freshly ic&e' eas in front of the), eating to their hearts7 content When aasi foun' secially nice=si>e' eas, he +oul' our the) into .aster7s han', saying, 4#aste ho+ goo' this one is4 .aster inturn +oul' 'o li&e+ise #he sa)e thing +oul' haen +ith fruits they fe' each other When the freshic&e' fruits ca)e in fro) the gar'en, the first thing aasi 'i' +as to ic& out the largest an' +hat hehoe' +oul' be the s+eetest to sen' to .aster, no )atter +here .aster +as, at ncinitas, .t

Washington, or #+enty=%ine Pal)s .aster, li&e+ise, 'i' not go by a store +ithout going in to see iferchance there )ight be so)ething 'ifferent for his little boy -uch loving thoughts asse' bac& an'forth +ith these han'outs that ! a) sure that the fruits an' other e'ibles +ere )a'e s+eet becausethey +ere i)regnate' +ith the Divine love they bore for each other

Ra8asi1s 9;@ Illness

arly 193, aasis financial an' business 'ifficulties force' hi) to re)ain in :ansas City )ore thanhe +ishe' His visits to the her)itage +ere fe+ an' far bet+een, an' +hen he +as able to co)e, it +asonly for a +ee& or ut)ost t+o +ee&s But as the years rolle' by, his business i)rove' an' he ha'better )en to +ho) to entrust his business 'uring his absence, an' it )a'e it ossible for hi) to co)e)ore often an' for longer erio's !n the sring of 19K, aasi suffere' a serious illness He ca)e tothe her)itage to convalesce an' he re)aine' for the +hole su))er He again ca)e to sen' severalof the +inter )onths that sa)e year #hereafter, aasi +oul' co)e to the her)itage 'uring :ansasCitys hottest )onths an' the +inter7s col'est )onths During the erio' bet+een 5ebruary 1902 to

1900, aasi only returne' to :ansas City for three short business tris

.ercises

aasi +as an early riser but he 'i' not co)e out of his roo)s until nine or ten, 'een'ing on the +eather !f it +as clear an' sunny, he +as out on the la+n early 'oing his tensing an' other e6ercises,such as stan'ing on his hea' or +al&ing on his han's +ith his legs uright in the air He coul' +al& onhis han's in this fashion for a long 'istance "fter erfecting it, he tol' )e that +hen he +as youngerhe ha' a cousin +ho coul' +al& on his han's an' he, aasi, +as not able toN therefore, he ac?uire' a'ee 'esire to 'o li&e+ise He +as li&e a rou' little boy sho+ing .aster an' us ho+ +ell he coul'erfor) this e6ercise When .asters brother, Bhisnu (hosh, ca)e fro) !n'ia to ncinitas, he +ante'to teach aasi all the asanas .aster a'vise' aasi not to 'elve in too )any hysical e6ercises because

he sai', 4*ou +ill lose your ecstasy4 #hese hysical e6ercises outsi'e of tension an' other of .asterse6ercises are alright for those +ho 'o not 'eely )e'itate

aasi li&e' to outstretch flat on the floor to straighten his bac& an' sine an' ben' his &neessusen'e' over his sto)ach, baby fashion, an' re)aine' in that osition for a long ti)e He reeate'the e6ercise )any ti)es 'uring the 'ay an' evening He sai' he ractice' this often 'uring his businesshours in the rivacy of his office

aasi an' his lay)ates, the sun an' fresh air, got along very +ell together He love' the) bothHe 'i' not co)e in the house until he ha' to He sent the +hole 'ay long outsi'e, sunbathing an')e'itating on the la+n !t +as aasis habit to lie on his sto)ach +ith his sine straight ! coul' see bythe e6ression on his face that his )in' an' +ill +ere ulling the energy u his sine to the Christ

Center, ! once as&e' hi), 4Do you )e'itate all the ti)eO4 4Well,4 he sai', 4not all the ti)e $ther+ise,! coul' not concentrate on )y business !f they +ere not successful, -5 +oul' suffer4 .aster often

100



reeate' his favorite line to aasi, 4*ou are in business for (o'4 very ti)e aasi financially hele'-5, .aster +oul' reeat, 4Doing so )uch for (o' roves you are in business for Hi)4 .astere6laine', 4#here are a lot of religionists +ho use religion for business, but there is no sin in usingbusiness )etho's for religion, nor to )a&e your business successful that you )ay hel (o'7s +or&4

aasi love' )usic, but he coul' not carry a tune Whenever he ha' a articularly 'ee )e'itation,

he ca)e into the house singing, 4! a) the s&y, .other, ! a) the vast blue ocean an' s&y,4 e6an'inghis ar)s above his hea' as he sang

S'i**ing in te Ocean

-u))er or +inter, he enoye' going 'o+n to the beach for a long s+i)N ho+ever, he enoye' floatingrather than s+i))ing #hough he li&e' the invigorating e6ercise 7 of s+i))ing, better than that, heli&e' the rela6ing effect of floating He tol' )e,7 4!t +as li&e floating in the !nfinite, +ith the 'ethlessocean belo+ an' the li)itless s&y above4 "fter+ar's, he +oul' ta&e a long +al& on the san'y beachbefore co)ing bac& u

5or )any years, there +ere only a fe+ boys living in the garage aart)ent in ncinitas, but .aster

still aointe' )e to be aasi7s bo'y guar' +hen he +ent 'o+n to the beach an' gave )e instructionsnot to allo+ anyone else to go +ith aasi or let hi) go 'o+n alone "lso ! +as to +al& at a 'istancebehin' hi) an' sit on the beach +hile he s+a) !n case he ha' trouble +hile in the +ater, ! coul'ren'er hel, .aster a''e' 4His osition an' )oney +ill attract those +ho +ill +ant to aroach hi)for favors, an' if so)eone is +ith hi) they +on7t 'are4

.any years later, after .anuel left our e)loy, .aster tol' )e this story that +as reorte' to hi)by one of the .e6ican boys that &ne+ .anuel, saying, 4.anuel ha' lanne' to have his +ife aroachaasi on the beach #hey +ere going to say that aasi )a'e asses at her, then try to blac&)ail hi),but .anuel co)laine', 7.iss Darling +as al+ays so)e+here on the beach an' +oul' have serve' as a

+itness against us #herefore, +e coul' not carry out our sche)e7 4 .aster a''e' +ith great

satisfaction< 4-ee, )y intuition is trying to constantly rotect hi)4 #he other reason +hy .aster ha' )e acco)any aasi +as that aasi ha' acci'ent &ar)a .y

&ar)a being 'ifferent +oul' hel to counteract his #his is also another reason .aster al+ays rovi'e'a 'river for aasi ! coul' also carry his to+els an' solvent to re)ove the tar fro) his feet ! +oul'lace these things +here he selecte', then ! +oul' go off an' fin' )yself a sot a goo' 'istance a+aybut +ithin sight He al+ays +ent 'o+n our o+n stair+ay Winter or su))er +hen he +as at theher)itage, aasi +ent 'o+n to the beach every 'ay ! re)e)ber he +ent 'o+n alone once When heca)e bac&, he +as blee'ing rofusely He ha' been 'eely cut by a stingray #hey +ere se)i=oisonous an' very ainful ! calle' the 'octor ust in case #here +ere no other acci'ents When theboys +ere available, aasi li&e' to ta&e so)e to the beach +ith hi)

During the first fe+ years, .aster use' to go 'o+n to the beach +ith aasi an' a grou of us !t +as on one of these occasions in January, 193, that .aster sat on a large stone an' aasi besi'e hi).aster touche' hi) on the chest an' aasi +ent into sa)a'hi an' re)aine' in that consciousness fora long ti)e .aster brought hi) bac& to this )un'ane +orl' again aasi 'i' not li&e to s+i) in oolsfor the +ater +as not fresh enough for hi), esecially if he coul' have the fresh salt ocean to bathe inHe 'i', ho+ever, go a fe+ ti)es in our ool only because .aster as&e' hi) to go +ith hi) an' he

+ante' to lease hi)

Ra8asi1s /o(($

aasi7s hobby +as gro+ing fruits an' vegetables He ha' a five hun're'=acre grove in Pharr, #e6as, ofin& graefruit, so)e in& an' other oranges, an' full large tangerines His navel oranges +ere the

largest ! have ever seen "ll of these fruits +ere very s+eet an' uicy, the best in the +orl', .aster +oul' e6clai) an' +e all agree' His fruits +on )any blue ribbons His greatest ri'e +as to gro+ the

101



best ?uality an' )aintain that ?uality He use' to shi thousan's of bas&ets fille' +ith his fruits forChrist)as gifts to his frien's an' business associates He use' to fill his suitcases +ith his fruit an'bring the) to .aster an' for us all to enoy $ne +inter in the late 19K@7s, his grove suffere' a three='ay free>e +hich &ille' all the fruit on the trees an' 'estroye' )any trees He 'i' not have fruit to sellor give to his frien's, although there +as enough for his ersonal use 5or several years, this grove +as

a )illion='ollar business !t +as a rofitable hobby $n his :ansas City state an' resi'ence, he also)aintaine' a large orchar' of +on'erful gol'en 'elicious ales an' other varieties of ales an'fruits He ha' a nice gar'en +hich sulie' hi) +ith fresh vegetables at every )eal, e6cet of course,'uring the +inter )onths !n 19K, our ncinitas gar'en +as rou' to shi hi) t+o large bo6es offresh vegetables an' fruits t+ice a +ee& by air e6ress so he never +as out of fresh gar'en vegetablesin the +inter )onths +hen he +as in :ansas City During the erio' of 193; to 19K, .aster an'aasi both )a'e several atte)ts to gro+ vegetables an' fruit at ncinitas We 'i' not have sufficient)en or )oney to carry the gar'en for any length of ti)e, although +ith bits of gar'ening, there +asal+ays enough vegetables for .aster an' aasi7s use ! ?uote a fe+ of .asters letters to aasiregar'ing gar'ening

-P#.B 3@, 19K@ E ! a) trying to fin' !)erate carrot see' an' +ill lant the) behin'the cottage

-P#.B 11, 19K1 E ! aban'one' the vegetable gar'en for the lac& of efficient hel #he +ater bill +as so high it is cheaer to buy vegetables But your carrots an' s)all atch of eas +ill be regularly ta&en care of ! have 'efinitely arrange' un'er )ine an' Durga7s suervisionthat a large carrot suly for you be )aintaine' *oganan'a

aasi, seeing our ncinitas lan' +as not being utili>e', +ante' to start a large=scale far) torovi'e .t Washington an' ncinitas 'isciles But .aster ha' lans for this or that lot of lan'

#herefore, it +as lying i'le aasi al+ays sai', 4#he soil +as )a'e by (o' to gro+ the necessities of

life4 $ne 'ay he ca)e to )e an' sai', 4!f ! can7t have lan' aroun' this colony to gro+ things, !7ll goout an' buy )yself a far)4 He as&e' )e to 'rive hi) in the country on a far) hunt We +ent severalti)es, but each ti)e he ca)e bac& to the her)itage, he +oul' say, 4#here is no lace li&e here4 -eeingho+ an6ious he +as to have a far), ! so&e to .aster about it When .aster hear' that aasi +as so'eter)ine' to have a far) even to the oint of buying one else+here, he agree' to let hi) use all theavailable lan' to )a&e it his ncinitas7 roect aasi +as very hay He al+ays +ante' to hire a

Jaanese fa)ily to +or& in the gar'en, but .aster +as not too &een on the i'ea because he felt that anoutsi'er +oul' cause trouble

arly in 19K, .aster foun' that ugene Benau, a stu'ent an' a far)er, ha' lost his far)through ba' +eather an' 'ebts .aster hire' hi) to +or& in the gar'en aasi too& full charge of thetea gar'en an' all its e6enses an' +ages an' )anage' it He bought all the 'ifferent varieties of fruit

an' nut trees an' bought a ne+ tractor an' far) e?ui)ent He +ent at it in a big +ay He lante')any varieties of vegetables We ha' at one ti)e or another the assort)ent of eleven 'ifferent

vegetables, even see's fro) !n'ia We trie' an' succee'e' gro+ing several of the) He even ut +irecages aroun' each fruit tree to &ee the bir's out $ne coul' see aasi +al&ing aroun' each tree +ithhis bas&et going fro) one cage to the other, ic&ing eaches, figs, or +hatever +as in season He

+oul' eat his fill an' bring the bas&et full to the house for us all His only ast ti)e an' oy he ha'once tol' )e 4+as to gro+ an' eat fresh fruits an' vegetables ! 'on7t s)o&e, eat )eat, 'rin&, or haveother ba' habits so ! li&e to gro+ things,4 a ast ti)e +hich +as very rofitable for -5 We reae'the results of the roect His only ast ti)e in ncinitas or :ansas City +as sent in the orchar' or inthe vegetable gar'en, luc&ing the sun=coo&e' vegetables an' fruit off the trees, vines, or fro) thegroun', an' he ate the) on the sot .aster +as very hay that the gar'en +as so successful He

thoroughly enoye' all the vegetables an' secially the Babcoc& eaches .aster an' aasi use' to sitor +al& han' in han', tal&ing of this or that vegetable or fruit #hey +ere at one in all their

102



un'erstan'ing, for love reigne' sure)e in their hearts for each other

! ?uote t+o letters fro) .aster to aasi<

JA* , 19K E *our i'ea of gar'ening fruit trees is very ractical an' aealing, but for yourstarting the gar'en, +e +oul' have little to eat here

-P#.B 9, 19K E *our racticality is very evi'ent for acting accor'ing to )y (o'=gui'e' +ishes an' the +ay you are )anaging the vegetable gar'en, canning, an' selling thesurlus to revent any +illful +aste

aasi love' to +al& He +oul' go on a long +al& before or after the evening )eal He +oul' goto the orchar', or to the retreats an' the cafe to bless the 'evotees an' encourage the) He love' therain an' +oul' ut on his bathing trun&s an' go out for a +al& in it #he s+eetest sight +as +hen.aster +as at ncinitas, he an' aasi +oul' oyfully +al& han' in han', u an' 'o+n the her)itagela+n

elenishing aasis toilet articles an' foo' stuff or househol' articles 'oes not soun' li&e it +oul' be such a chore But it turne' out that everything he use' as a har' ite) to get or only articularstores carrie' the) "n' ! ha' to +al& )iles fro) one store to the other to fin' the), esecially'uring the +ar +hen things +ere so har' to get Believe )e, +hen ! foun' the), ! bought a largesuly

aasi +as haiest in the fresh oen air #he house ha' to be +ell aire' at all ti)es, rain, col', orfoggy #he Win'o+s an' 'oors ha' to be &et Uvi'e oen His be' never ha' the srea' on becausehe li&e' to have his be' )a'e u +ith fresh sheets every 'ay an' left oen, an' the be' ushe' in the'oor+ay +here the sun shone to let the sun our on it until sun'o+n Being on the ocean, theaart)ent +as al+ays 'a)ish

Ra8asi 6i)ing %one$ to %e*(ers

"t Christ)as ti)e, .aster allo+e' aasi to give everyone in the house L0@@ .aster 'i' not +antaasi to give to in'ivi'uals at any other ti)e because .aster sai', 4#hey +ill get use' to hi) giving tothe) an' they in turn +oul' thin& of hi) as a )oney bag instea' of the saint that he really is4 #hisinfor)ation ! ha' to carefully ass on to aasi +ithout offen'ing hi), for he +as very generous an'li&e' to give to those on the siritual ath .aster +ante' to install in the )in's an' hearts of all the'evotees a 'ee resectful attitu'e to+ar' aasi at all ti)es

Odors and Cleanliness

Personal cleanliness +as a necessity aroun' hi) He +as so clean hi)self ven after a s+i), he +oul'

ta&e a sho+er every 'ay He 'i' not even li&e fragrant erfu)es use' aroun' hi) .aster use' to callhi), 4his nature boy4

!n or'er to avoi' the o'ors fro) the large &itchen co)ing into his aart)ent, ! thought of thei'ea of buil'ing a +all bet+een .aster7s be'roo) an' ?uarters an' aasi7s &itchen #his ! thought

+oul' also give .aster )ore rivacy for the 'isciles an' .asters co)ing an' going to his ?uarters atall hours of 'ay or night

Ra8asi1s Reading /a(its

aasi 'i' not 'o )uch rea'ing His ne+saer, a fe+ of .asters boo&s, an' his letters +ere all in hisbathroo) +here he sai' he 'i' )ost of the rea'ing Being a business)an he +as very strict about

receiving his business letters -ecial tris ha' to be )a'e to assure his getting the) on ti)e He +oul'glance through the) nless the +eather 'i' not er)it sunbathing, he sel'o) sat at his 'es& to +or&

103



'uring the 'ay because he 'i' not +ish to )iss any of the 'ay outsi'e He +or&e' an' ans+ere' his)ail until late in the evening He either +rote notes or letters long han' or he 'ictate' the) !n 19K;,.arorie Benau too& shorthan' He hire' her to ta&e 'ictation an' tye his letters for hi) When theBenaus left to+n, Bro -arolanan'a, +ho +as a court=shorthan' recor'er, too& the 'ictation on his)achine #his +ay aasi7s business +as ta&en care of through letters an' hone calls +hile he +as at

the her)itage He +oul' )a&e one or t+o long 'istance business calls to :ansas City or #e6as al)ostevery 'ay He rarely retire' very late, it +as usually eleven or thereabouts

Carr$ing /ea)$ "eigts

.aster 'i' not allo+ aasi to carry heavy+eight things .aster has sai' that 4ersons +ho go 'eeinto )e'itation can 'o light or )ental +or&, but not heavy )anual labor4

Ra8asis 4ressing /a(its

While in ncinitas, aasi live' in his bathing trun&s Ho+ever, he 'resse' to )eet so)eone or to gofor his +al&s He +as a neat 'resser an' ha' beautiful suits an' ac&ets of very fine )aterials of

cash)ere He 'i' not li&e roughness He +ore a tie only +hen he ha' to His shoes +ere large enoughto be co)fortable, an' he +oul' ta&e the) off the )inute he ca)e in the houseN ho+ever, he 'i' notgo barefoot either, for it +as too unsanitary He +ore san'als, )ules, or other soft housesliers Beingof a conservative nature, he +oul' not +ear sorts shirts at first, but he soon got over that, for near abeach, )ost of the )en +ear sorts shirts an' slac&s He +as hay to +ear the) thereafter, for theyrove' so co)fortable to hi) When aasi ca)e for long erio's, ! sent his soile' clothes to his:ansas City resi'ence He ha' a goo' laun'ress +ho +ashe' every 'ay an' she +oul' sen' the) bac&clean an' irone'

$nce in a +hile, aasi +oul' li&e to go on a 'rive, esecially out in the country He li&e' a goo'rate of see', traffic er)itting He +as rather i)atient on the roa' +ith other 'rivers +ho +oul' not)ove over if he +ante' to ass He +oul' lean on the horn until they 'i' He +as a very goo' 'river

an' enoye' 'riving hi)self at ti)es "t first .aster let hi) have one of his cars for aasis use, but inthe latter years, aasi bought his o+n He +as artial to $l's)obiles He ha' a chauffeur in :ansasCity, though aasi 'rove hi)self bac& an' forth to his office #he chauffeur &et aasi7s cari))aculately clean an' in erfect +or&ing or'er at all ti)es, rea'y for aasi to turn the &ey aasie6ecte' the sa)e service fro) us an' beca)e rather i)atient if the car +as not ust right

Prior to 19K3, ! 'i' not &no+ ho+ to 'rive a car .aster ha' often e6resse' a 'esire that ! learnto 'rive, but since he 'i' not ress the oint, ! 'i' not +ish to a'' )ore to )y alrea'y heavy sche'uleHo+ever, 'uring the Jaanese +ar in 19K3, gas an' tires +ere ratione' aasi 'i' not have his o+n carat ncinitas at that ti)e When he infor)e' us of his co)ing visit, ! too& the train to Aos "ngeles toget fresh foo' sulies, then either -r -ailasuta or .r Castillo 'rove )e to the airort or railroa'

station to ic& aasi u an' 'rive hi) to ncinitas #he 'river ha' to ta&e the train or bus bac& to Aos "ngeles "gain this roce'ure +as reeate' +hen it ca)e ti)e for aasis 'earture $ne 'ay aasian' ! +ere 'iscussing the har'shi this i)ose' on .aster an' the 'river aasi offere' to teach )eho+ to 'rive an' encourage' )e to learn by a''ing, 4We +ill &ee it a secret an' the ne6t ti)e .aster

+ants )e at .ount Washington, you can 'rive )e an' surrise .aster by saying you 'rove )e4 very'ay thereafter, he )a'e )e 'rive He +as a goo' teacher We 'rove on the bac& roa's of the ncinitascountrysi'e to avoi' the high+ay in the beginning He +oul' not )iss one 'ay for he sai', 4!t +oul'be har'er to start again4 When aasi tol' .aster that ! ha' 'riven hi) 'o+n, .aster shoute' +ithoy, for it relieve' his )in' fro) rovi'ing a 'river, lus eli)inate' travel e6enses Henceforth,'riving 'uties +ere a''e' to )y service to aasi Day or night, ! 'rove hi) +herever he +ante' to goan' bac& an' forth to the airort an' stations

104



Landslide

aasi +as 'o+n at the beach +hen the first lan'sli'e occurre' un'er the te)le Bernar' Cole ca)erunning 'o+n to tell hi) aasi +as not a bit e6citable He 'i' not say a +or' to Bernar' nor 'i' hehurry bac& He too& his s+i) an' +al& as usual before co)ing to see the 'a)age the sli'e ha' 'one

Ugliness and Negati)eness

aasi 'i' not li&e ugliness in any for) 5or instance, if he 'roe' so)ething on the floor an' sille'its contents, he 'isgustingly +al&e' out of the roo) as fast as he coul' so he +oul' not have to see itHe +as reulse' by any s+ear +or'N even 4'a)4 he 'i' not arove of, nor 'i' ! ever hear' hi) say iteither or any other ugly +or', not even 4$h, boy4 .aster +oul' not allo+ us to tal& in a negative veinto aasiN the conversation or reorts or tal&ing to aasi ha' to be on a constructive basis ! can +ellun'erstan' the reason for this +is'o), for aasi +as not able to ta&e negativeness of any tye !f theslightest negative ele)ent entere' into reorts, he thereafter +oul' not have anything to 'o +ith theroect or erson, or if he sa+ so)eone ste out of character, he +oul' 'isregar' that erson !f heha' to 'eal +ith the erson any+ay, no favors +ere grante' to that erson, though he +as very

)erciful an' forgiving )ost of the ti)eaasi +as esecially naive to+ar's anyone on the siritual ath He thought they +ere all angels

an' +ithout faults an' if he sa+ the) )a&e a faulty )ove, he +as highly critical of that erson He,ho+ever, beca)e very tolerant as he rogresse' on the siritual ath #hat is the reason .aster tol')e that aasi attracte' a )entally an' hysically invali' +ife, to learn atience, an' he surely 'i'

$ne coul' easily reason +ith aasi an' get results< #hough he +as a very successful business)an,he +as very chil'=li&e in his )anneris)s He 'eely love' his earthly )otherN therefore, he )orerea'ily reson'e' to )otherly aeals than to +o)anish e)otions .otherly raises for his goo''ee's to+ar' the organi>ation an' to .aster an' others +oul' give hi) the incentive to continue to'o )ore

.cono*ical /a(its

aasi +as the &in' of erson that if you tell hi) to ta&e one soonful of anything, he +oul' ta&e t+ofor goo' )easure #his +as also true +ith his generosity He 'i' not )in' aying a high rice forso)ething goo', but he +as very econo)ical on other things, li&e +hen he eele' an ale, he +oul'ta&e infinite atience eeling it so thin that the s&in +oul' be transarent He +as honest to the corean' li&e' honesty in others li&e +hen he gave )e )oney to sen' on househol' ite)s aasi ai' forhis o+n u&ee +hile he +as at the her)itage, because he sai', 4! li&e goo' things an' they aree6ensive, an' ! 'ont +ant to bur'en -5 +ith )y e6travagance4

0inances

He +as very generous an' gave )e lenty of cash to get his things +ith ! gave hi) an account of thee6en'itures He 'i' not li&e that, saying, 4*ou 'ont nee' to give )e these accounts -ee ! a) tearingthe) +ithout even loo&ing at the), an' if you ersist on 'oing so, ! +ill continue to tear the), sothere is no use your going through that trouble of &eeing an account for )e4

! abi'e' by his +ishes, but ! +as e6tre)ely careful +ith his )oney for ! &ne+ he +as -cottish inhis +ays, but ! also &ne+ he li&e' goo' ?uality "fter he gave .aster )oney, he never ?uestione'.aster, +hat he 'i' +ith it, nor ho+ )uch +as sent on this or that roect -oon after, the her)itage

+as co)lete', aasi suffere' great financial an' business 'ifficulties Being a gentle)an of generousan' ten'er heart, he 'i' not +ish to 'a)en .asters oy an' enthusias) for the i)rove)ent ofher)itage groun's He sai' nothing to .aster .aster, not reali>ing aasi7s re'ica)ent, continue'urchasing an' aying bills, an' he ha' to continually +rite to aasi for )ore fun's, +ith +hich torelenish his fast='i)inishing !n'ian 5un', +hich aasi ha' given hi) as a Christ)as gift in 193

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-o)eho+ aasi rovi'e' the )oney for the current bills, but not the a)ounts .aster sent inbeautifying both the her)itage an' .t Washington groun's #herefore, aasi coul' not catch u inrestoring .asters !n'ian 5un'

.aster +as use' to overty an' self='enial for an i'eal !n'ia7s si)le life 'i' not re?uire so )uchbuying of furniture, reair bills, an' relace)ents of sulies as +e have here $f course, .aster

reali>e' that ")ericas living con'itions coul' not confor) +ith !n'ias +ay of life .aster often sai',4!n ")erica ! a) critici>e' for +earing a cotton robe, an' in !n'ia ! +oul' be critici>e' for +earing asil& robe4 #hese an' si)ilar con'itions boun' hi) to the grin'ing stone of earning the )oney torovi'e his ")erican !nstitution +ith the i))e'iate necessities He +as not a business)an He &ne+nothing of business ter)s or roble)s nor the har' &noc&s of ")erican business tactics He ha' tolearn by the trial=an'=error )etho' to )a&e a success of an organi>ation +hose e6enses al+ays fare6cee'e' its inco)e #herefore, .aster suffere' )any &no+n an' un&no+n har'shis, all through hislife

.aster struggle' through the 'eression years of 193@, 1931 .aster 'een'e' uon an' receive'fro) Dr an' .rs Ae+is financial hel the revious years, but this ne+ un'erta&ing of )anaging .t

Washington +as )ore than they an' he coul' carry alone, so his constant rayer +as that (o' +oul'sen' hi) a )ale 'iscile +ho +oul' be +ealthy, honest, &in', an' above all +ho +oul' have a 'ee'esire an' love to consciously contact (o' #his +as not an unusual rayer, for .aster &ne+ (o'7sla+ that +hen the Aor' sen's out one of his Divine )essengers, He also sen's both &in's of 'evoteesthose +ho +ill hel hi) financially as +ell as those +ho +ill give service to fulfill his )ission in life(o' ans+ere' .asters aeals in 5ebruary 1932 +ith one of His +illing sons JJ Aynn, +ho in 1901,

+as given the siritual na)e of aasi Jana&anan'a to hel .aster bear his financial cross aasi +asall .aster siritually e6ecte', yes, even )ore He +as a ractical business )an, hu)ble, neverbragging about his abilities, so )uch so that it +as not until the latter art of .asters life 'i' he fin'out that aasi +as a financial +i>ar', +ho &ne+ the stoc& )ar&et li&e a boo&, for he +as also a ban&er,a la+yer, an' +ell=verse' in real estate )atters, an' ha' nu)erous other caacities

!))e'iately uon )eeting Para)hansai, aasi accete' hi) as his guru an' i)licitly truste'an' revere' hi) as a Christ "ll these +on'erful ?ualities serve' hi) +ell no+ an' for the years toco)e, for the tests lace' uon hi) +ere in'ee' very trying #he Aor' ha' ans+ere' .aster7s rayersfor a frien' +ho +oul' hel hi) carry out (o'7s +or& "t their first )eeting, aasi ha' given hi) alarge 'onation to start reublishing bi)onthly the ast=West )aga>ine an' lacing )ore a's toro)ote the Aessons, to srea' the salvation=giving :riya techni?ue to the +orl' by e6tensive an'continuous a'vertising to &ee the na)e of -5 before the ublic7s eye .aster fully e6ecte' thefun's to co)e in unli)ite' a)ounts for that urose, an' it )ay have been so, but in the )eanti)e,.aster )a'e his first aeal to aasi in his "ril 3, 1932 letter to ay off the .t Washington)ortgage "fter several aeals an' 'ue consi'eration, aasi tol' .aster to start negotiations +ith the.ortgage Co)any !n .ay 1933, aasi gave .aster so)e (overn)ent Bon's, the value of +hich

+oul' cover the full a)ount of the )ortgage

!n the )eanti)e, .aster, 'eserately in nee' of )oney, sol' the bon's +hich aasi ha'stiulate' for the )ortgage ay)ent aasi later e6laine' to )e that he ha' give .aster all the rea'ycash that Uvas available to hi) at his first )eeting +ith .aster in 5ebruary #herefore, +hen .asteras&e' hi) to ay off the )ortgage, he 'i' not have the )oney, but he 'i' have these bon's +hich hegave .aster to hol' until the negotiations +ere co)lete an' they coul' be sol' to ay the )ortgage

When the ti)e ca)e to )a&e the ay)ent, neither .aster or aasi ha' the )oney to co)lete thetransaction

$n the other han', let us ta&e .aster7s re'ica)ent into consi'eration $ur country in 1932=33 +as in one of its +orse financial 'ifficulties, .t Washington +as heavily in 'ebt an' ha' )any )ouths

to fee', .aster ha' ca)aign an' travel e6enses to )eet, the +or& +as again at a stan' still, an'.aster ha' no one to ta&e care of all of these )atters or to a'vertise to get ne+ )e)bers .aster,

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roosition than stoc&s, +hereas aasi, a ban&er, sai' that real estate for inco)e uroses +as also very ris&y, for buil'ings have to be )aintaine' in goo' con'ition, therefore, 'ecreasing the inco)e, +hereas stoc&s ai' their 'ivi'en's +ithout any e6enses to the stoc&hol'er #rue, they can go u or'o+n, but real estate also 'ereciates in value, an' if the country goes 'o+n all businesses +oul' 'oli&e+ise, inclu'ing real estate .aster 'i' not reali>e that each ne+ roect increase' the e6enses

instea' of rovi'ing inco)e #he ri)ary cost +as not the only e6ense of the roect, but its)aintenance, +ith a''itional ersonnel to oerate an' care for the roect, increase' the e6enses.aster still +ante' a large cash=+or&ing fun' to be able to create these ne+ roects +ithout having toas& aasi for a''itional fun's for the) #herefore, .aster sol' several stoc&s at a loss He 'i' notreali>e that by selling the stoc&s he +as 'eleting the very thing he +ante' )ost a er)anent fun'.asters continue' aeals for an en'o+)ent for the her)itage bore fruit in 19K;

When aasi arrive' at the her)itage an' +hen .aster ca)e in to see hi), .aster +as +earing hisa)ethyst ring #hey sat on the 'avenort together Presently aasi left the roo) an' ca)e bac&,hol'ing a large )anila enveloe in his han' He sat on the floor at .aster7s feet an' oene' theenveloe an' lai' certificate after certificate si'e by si'e on the floor at .aster7s feet #hen, on theother si'e of the 5oru) Cafeteria stoc& certificates, he lace' several cash bon's -)iling, he loo&e'

u at .aster an' as&e', 4Which of these t+o 'o you +antO4 .aster shyly s)ile' an' ans+ere', 4both4aasi laughe' an' han'e' the) all to hi) security +hich rovi'e' the her)itage +ith a goo' )onthlyinco)e #ears of oy ran 'o+n .aster7s chee&s, for at last his 'rea) her)itage +oul' continue to e6istafter their earthly 'earture .aster thre+ his ar)s aroun' aasi7s nec& an' &isse' his forehea' an'blesse' hi) over an' over again #hereafter, .aster calle' the ring he +as +earing his 4goo' luc&ring4 He a''e' this a)ethyst to others he ha' an' ha' a cross )a'e for aasi for Christ)as an'calle' it 4aasi7s roserity cross4 aasi highly cherishe' this cross as +ell as the 'ia)on' cross.aster gave hi) at .asters last Christ)as on earth +ith us

!n the latter years of .asters life, he ca)e to un'erstan' the value of the stoc&s an' its regular'ivi'en's an' 'eely la)ente' the fact that he sol' those +on'erful stoc&s an' sent so )uch )oney

on buil'ing roects, for it +as at this ti)e also that aasi tol' .aster ho+ )uch )oney he ha''onate' throughout the years #hough irregular an' in s)all, )e'iu), an' )any ti)es large a)ounts,he ha' given -elf=eali>ation 5ello+shi over a )illion 'ollars in cash, +hich +as use' to buil'roects, an' a )illion in stoc&s, it +as then that .aster sai' regretfully that he +ishe' he ha' notsent that )oney on roects that +ere locate' in so )any 'ifferent 'irections, but if he ha'concentrate' all his effort an' that )oney in srea'ing the teachings an' )a&ing .t Washington aresentable international hea'?uarters, instea' of buil'ings that cost so )uch to )aintain, the +or&

+oul' have gone far in his lifeti)e

!t fell to )y lot to interce'e bet+een .aster an' aasi, +hen .aster +ante' fun's for 'ifferentroects #hat is ho+ ! &ne+ .aster7s si'e of the story, but ! also learne' aasi7s si'e as +ell When.aster +oul' as& )e to aroach aasi for the fun's for so)ething or another, he +oul' +ant )e to

'o it right there an' then an' hurry bac& +ith the ans+er With .aster, everything ha' to be 'one in ahurry or ?uic&ly He often tol' us he 'i' not have ti)e to +ait aasi +as the oosite He 'elaye'an' +aite', for he thought he ha' years ahea' of hi) yet to 'o great things for -5 financially veryti)e .aster blesse' aasi, he al+ays sai', 4*ou +ill be blesse' +ith a long life for 'oing so )uch for-54 But as +e +ill see later -atan 'i' not li&e aasi 'oing so )uch for the salvation=giving +or& of-5 an' trie' to sto hi) before his )ission ha' been acco)lishe' But for .aster7s an' (o'sgrace, he 'i' finish an' +ent to his 'eserve' re+ar'

.aster7s 'esire to get an ans+er i))e'iately very sel'o) +or&e', for aasi +as a )an of slo+'ecisions, for he ha' to thin& over, ho+ he coul' )anage or ho+ he coul' get the fun's +ithout har)to his business Writing all this after the elase of so )any years, it see)s li&e a large or'er for .aster

an' aasi to fill $ur ")erican )in's )ay ?uestion ho+ coul' .aster e6ect so )uch fro) oneerson #he ans+er is that if one un'erstan's that our Belove' .aster felt his oneness +ith theCreator of the niverseN hence, a son can e6ect abun'ance fro) His Divine 5ather, .other (o', or

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vice versa, +hich is often the case bet+een the .aster an' 'iscile in relationshi .aster 'eely love'aasi an' regar'e' an' treate' hi) as a son #herefore, he felt the right of a father to 'e)an' fro)the son +ho) he &ne+ +as 'estine' to lay the role of -5s financial savior #hough .aster &ne+this 'ee=hi''en truth an' often +rote aasi about it, still it 'i' not enetrate as 'eely in aasisconsciousness at that ti)e as it +as i)rinte' in .aster7s Christ Consciousness But one only has to

see the files reare' on 'ifferent roects an' the resent='ay financial reorts to see that through(o's grace an' .aster7s 'ee foresight an' aasi7s generous an' loving resonse, this great +or& hasborne, an' no+ )ore than ever bears the fruit of their in'ivi'ual actions an' sacrifices

.aster ha' hoe' an' raye' that aasi coul' have sulie' hi) +ith all the fun's he nee'e' +ithout having to constantly )a&e aeals, but since this +as not the case, .aster resigne' hi)self toerfor) this 'ifficult tas& for (o'7s +or& aasi +as very generous an' too& ri'e in fulfilling.aster7s every +ish His co)assionate heart coul' not bear to see .aster suffer in any +ay He +oul'ut his ar)s aroun' .aster7s shoul'ers an' ut his han' in his o+n oc&et an' e)ty the) in.aster7s han' ! have often seen aasi leave for :ansas City +ith only a fe+ 'ollars in his oc&et forhe ha' given all he ha' to .aster for the +or& aasi +as hu)an enough to get ruffle' +ith so)e'e)an's He 'i' not say anything or ust a fe+ +or's, but his a+ +oul' set )ore fir)ly either +ith

'eter)ination or reulsion !n )ost of the ti)e aasi lovingly reson'e', for one coul' reach hi))uch ?uic&er by love an' &in'ness than by forceful 'e)an's .aster love' hi) so he 'i' not +ant tocause the slightest tinge of 'ishar)ony bet+een the), an' if aasi ha' to refuse for so)e reason oranother, .aster +oul' not have ha' the heart to argue the oint further

.aster7s greatest 'esire +as to re)ain on a siritual relationshi +ith aasi at all ti)es an' at allcosts When aasi ca)e to ncinitas or .t Washington, .aster )e'itate' an' only tal&e' siritualtoics an' avoi'e' business )atters, erchance those 'iscussions )ight bring about the slightest'ishar)ony #herefore, it +as in e6tre)e cases that .aster ersonally 'iscusse' the organi>ationsbusiness )atters !nstea' he +rote all his aeals in letters or as&e' )e to interce'e for hi) %ot onlythat ! )ay boost his roects to aasi, but )ore often than not, .aster 'i' not +ant to feel the brunt

of his aasi7s refusal if that +oul' have been the case .aster al+ays +ante' to see an' re)e)beraasi not as a business)an but as the belove' chil' of (o' #he love they ha' for each other +astruly 'ivine ! ?uote one of .aster7s letters to aasi, e6ressing his 'ee siritual love for hi)

."CH ;, 1932 E .ost Belove' of "ges< (uru is 'iscile an' 'iscile is guru boun' in oneeternal le'ge of frien'shi until they re'ee) one another7s soul in -irit Divine frien'shi isuncon'itional an' +aits until erfection -uch is )y frien'shi for you Hu)an frien'shi isselfish, i)erfect, an' )ost cannot reach beyon' the ortals of the to)b *our very resencere)in's an' infla)es in )e the sa)a'hi of (o' 5or ! see Hi) bla>ingly a+a&ene' in youDo you &no+ +hat it is to )eet so)eone blosso)ing out of incarnations fro) ages of 'ar&

+aiting ! shall +atch until all the etals of your )in' are a+a&ene' an' they 'rin& the 'ivine

fragrant sunlight an' srea' *ogo'a fragrance to all !t is goo' to )eet one accor'ing to thefulfill)ent of .asters rohecy $ne +ho in every 'etail )eets +ith all )y 'ivinee6ectations %obo'y in ")erica has 'ra+n such love an' areciation fro) )e as you haveby your 'ivine si)licity, self=control, an' above all your into6icating, 'eeening love of (o'! shall lea' you on #here is no 'eth to the sea of nectar We +ill 'ive li&e lu))ets until +ehave reache' the en'less ever=ne+ bliss We cannot )eet often enough for ! +ant one such asyou to enter into sa)a'hi +ith )e ! care for nothing else #hough as busy as you are, +rite to)e Just a line +ill suffice for our living lin& +ill al+ays re)ain burning to &ee our souls tie'to -irit Blesse' one, a )illion blessing for your cooeration of last night ! feel +hat you are'oing for )y (uru7s +or& ! never sa+ anyone 'o +ith such heart, sontaneity an' nobility asyou 'o ! ha' raye' to Divine .other, sen' )e a 'ivine son, o+erful an' i))aculate li&e

the rays to be )y co=artner in Babai7s great +or& "s you are reoicing for the ne+ blissgathering in your heart, so re)e)ber you too have given )e the sa)e oy for being the

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instru)ent of e)anciating )e fro) the tangles of our 'ivine +or& that ! )ay serve you,(uru, (o', *ogo'a, an' all through +riting an' sa)a'hi .y oy is boun'less With 'eeestlove an' eternal blessing +ith ever +atchful eyes of love for your constant rogress erysincerely yours,- *oganan'a

! ?uote an e6cert of .asters letter to aasi in 193K<

"nother ban?uet has co)e an' gone an' another is lanne' for %ove)ber 11th Will you beable to co)eO

+u(lic 0unctions

aasi 'i' not li&e to atten' ublic functions He rarely atten'e' any ban?uets or large affairs even inhis o+n business #he fe+ he atten'e' at .t Washington +ere urely to lease .aster 5or a businessreason, he +as cautious that his na)e 'i' not aear in ublic, +hich is usually the case in these affairssecially if it +as connecte' to *oga, the ne+saers +oul' be an6ious to ublici>e his na)e as they

ha' 'one before in :ansas City on 'ifferent occasions an' cause' )uch 'a)age to his business 8"saasi tol' .aster, 4!n !n'ia for follo+ing *oga ! +oul' be calle' a saint, but in ")erica ! a) calle' afool4 .aster +as an6ious to rotect aasi fro) 'ifficulties, for aasi +as in business for (o' "tone ban?uet that aasi atten'e', ! believe it +as the first ti)e he ha' co)e to .t Washington in1933, as he +al&e' in the ban?uet hall 8+hich is no+ the )ain office, ! +as lacing the tablecloths onthe first table as he ca)e in an' he stoe' to hel )e +ith the other en' of the table .aster +as solease' +ith his gesture, he sai', 4! see you have the sirit of service #hat is very goo'4

aasi also atten'e' the ncinitas cafe 'e'ication "fter the refresh)ents +ere serve', +e all sat atthe tables, +hen su''enly .aster touche' aasi He again +ent into a 'ee sa)a'hi When he ca)ebac& to conscious consciousness, .aster as&e' hi) to bless each one resent #hose +ho receive' the

blessings all sai' the sa)e things, that they felt an over+hel)ing love co)ing fro) hi) .aster sai'that his 4sa)a'hi +as one of Divine Aove4 aasi li&e' to re)ain alone an' )e'itate +hile he ha' achance in the siritual at)oshere an' not be in ublic functions

Sense o- S*ell

aasi ha' an overly active sense of s)ell He coul' 'etect o'ors via long 'istance, so to sea& Henever s)o&e' #herefore, he +as all the )ore sensitive to it than other o'ors He tol' )e, 4!f asales)an ca)e into )y office +ith a cigarette in his han', that sales)en +ent out of )y office +ithoutselling )e a thing4 He ha' a 4%o -)o&ing4 sign on his 'es& in his :ansas City office #hroughaasi7s e6a)le, )any of his business associates stoe' s)o&ing an' 'rin&ing :no+ing aasis'isli&e for s)o&ing, ! as&e' hi) ho+ he got along at business )eetings he ha' to atten' so often He

ans+ere', 4! 'ont allo+ it +hen ! have )y o+n )eetings +ith )y )en When ! go to the ban&,5oru) Cafeterias, an' railroa' )eetings, they too &no+ ! 'on7t li&e s)o&ing an' they resect that an''on7t s)o&e 'uring the )eeting But at other co))ittee )eetings, ! atiently en'ure it4

! as&e' aasi +hen he +ent to boar' of 'irectors or other )eetings, ho+ the other )e)bersbehave' 4!f they argue a)ongst the)selves an' 'o a lot of tal&ing, ho+ 'o you act or re=act to theiractionsO4 His rely +as, 4! ?uietly sit an' ractice Hong -au or ! )entally go u an' 'o+n the sine

+ith oen eyes, of course, an' ! let the) tal& the)selves out, an' +hen they run out of argu)ents an' +or's, so)eone +ill turn to )e an' say, 7What 'o you thin&, Ji))yO7 By that ti)e, ! have intuitivelyco)e u +ith an ans+er, then they +ill e6clai), 7Ho+ 'o you 'o itO *ou havent sai' a single +or' an'yet you are the one +ho solves the roble)F7 #hey +oul'nt believe )e even if ! tol' the) so ! re)ain

silent as to )y )etho' an' they are satisfie'4 5or that reason, aasi +as in great 'e)an', foreveryone +ho hear' of his business reutation +ante' hi) on their boar' $ne of his associates tol')e, 4! have been +ith .r Aynn K@ years an' ! have yet to see hi) )a&e a )ista&e in business

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u'g)ent4

ugene Benau, &no+ing that aasi +as sensitive to bo'ily o'ors, felt hi)self oblige' to ta&e asho+er an' change his clothes before co)ing u to see aasi, or if he 'i' not have ti)e, he +oul're)ain a long 'istance a+ay to tal& #he other )en felt the sa)e, +ho +or&e' in the gar'en or aroun'the house at ncinitas During aasis illness ! ha' occasions to tal& to several of aasi7s business

associates +ho tol' )eO 4.r Aynn sure has a o+erful sense of s)ell We &ee a+ay, if +e have ustbeen s)o&ing or ha' a little li?uor for he can 'etect it a )ile a+ay4 During his last illness -atan uthi) through several tests $n "ug 2@, 190K, he +as sunbathing as usual +hen he hurrie'ly ca)e in toas& )e if ! coul' s)ell this vile o'or he +as getting fro) his erson ! coul'n7t s)ell a thing #he o'or

+as so vile that it cause' hi) to have a chill an' the hair on his ar)s an' chest stoo' on en' +ith thelargest goose i)les ! have ever seen on anyone ! +ent outsi'e to insect the lace +here he +aslying on the la+n to see if there +as anything that +as causing this on careful e6a)ination, ! foun'nothing "fter a short ti)e, he ca)e bac& co)laining again of the sa)e vile o'or -eeing ho+'isturbe' he +as, ! as&e' hi) to sit 'o+n an' ! tol' hi) ho+ ! ha' rea' in so)e saints life that -atantrie' +ith vile o'ors an' aaritions to 'iscourage hi) fro) the siritual ath ! continue', 4-atan +illta&e any for) to rob the 'evotee of his blissful consciousness, an' ! believe that -atan is creating this

vile o'or, &no+ing ho+ sensitive you are to the) to try an' 'isturb you Just laugh in -atans face athis antics an' tell hi) that he cant 'isturb you fro) (o' an' .aster4 aasi s)ile' an' sai', 4#hat)ust be it4

! left hi) to conte)late this thought When ! ca)e bac& in a fe+ )inutes to see if he +as alrightan' if the vile o'or +as ersisting, he +as s)iling an' tol' )e, 4-ri *u&tes+ari ca)e He +as veryhay an' s)ile' uon )e an' the o'or left4 #hat reulsive o'or 'i' not return again -uch are the

+ays of (o' to hel us overco)e our over=in'ulgence in any one or all five of our senses

"ar

! ?uote e6certs of letters fro) .aster to aasi on ")erica

5B 1;, 19K@ E #he +orl' is getting )ore an' )ore co)licate' ! a) offering )y rayersfor Belove' ")erica

%ov 9, 19KK E Belove' ")ericas only re'ee)ing feature is she is in the +ar for an i'eal an'not for gain, but it is creating a lot of ba' &ar)a +hich is influencing the olitical tren' of thiscountry to+ar's co))unis) an' feu'ations #here never has been a better country than

")erica, +here caital an' labor +or&e' in har)ony an' enoying co))on roserity

$C# 10, 19K E #here never +as a )ore benign or 'e)ocratic civili>ation than ")erica.ost arts of the +orl' are not livable, that is, in the true sense of the stan'ar's of

co)fortable, safe living as that offere' by the -"

! ?uote a fe+ e6certs of letters to aasi fro) .aster on War

5B 1, 19K@ E #he )etahysical urose of +ar is aving the +ay to the free'o) of !n'ia,China, gyt, !n'onesia, "frica, an' all 'o+n=tro''en nations -till ! ray 'aily for an earlierter)ination of +ar than +hat )ass &ar)a of belligerent nations )ight 'ecree #here is grave'anger for -atan is coa6ing so)e oliticians to entangle ")erica into +ar We ray that 'ay

+ill never co)e

aasi +as an ")erican through an' through #hough he sai' he +as al)ost 'rafte' in the first

+orl' +ar but the +ar en'e' before he +as calle', he +as too ol' for the secon' +arN hence, he +assare' .any of his &ey )en +ere 'rafte' or oine' the services Ai&e other businesses, his co)anies

111



ha' to hire +o)en to ta&e the lace of the )en he lost to the service "fter the +ar they all ca)e bac&

$ne thing in articular )a'e hi) i)atient !t +as that it +as e6tre)ely 'ifficult to get train orlane reservations, an' )any ti)es +hen he +ent to the airort he +oul' fin' that riority ha' ta&enhis reservation an' he ha' to return to his office or the her)itage to +ait until he coul' get a ne+reservation "lthough he calle' before leaving to confir) his reservations, there al+ays +as the

ossibility that a last=)inute service)an +oul' co)e to clai) a seat an' the assengers ha' to give itu to the) He 'i' not )in' that !t +as the uncertainty of the +hole thing that )a'e hi) i)atient

aasi too, si'e by si'e +ith .aster an' all, raye' for a ?uic& ter)ination of a useless +ar Justonce 'i' ! hear hi) use the +or', 4fight4 !t +as in connection +ith the +ater)elons he ha' lante'an' the neighborhoo' boys +ho +oul' steal the +ater)elons He 'i' not )in' the +ater)elons beingta&en but they +oul' ruin the vines so the rest of the )elons +oul' not gro+ When the action +aserfor)e' too often, he sai', 4#here is ust enough !rish in )e to +ant to fight4 He +as three=?uarters -cot an' one=?uarter !rish He 'i' fight by lacing a +atch)an in the )elon atch every nightan' it +or&e' #hey 'i' not co)e bac&

aasi +as very sensitive to others7 sufferings an' 'isli&e' violence of any sort He tol' )e, 4When

! +as a little boy an' )y brothers or frien's use' to fight a)ongst each other, ! +oul' run behin' atree an' cry )y eyes out for ! 'i' not +ant either one to get hurt4

Bangle

.aster gave aasi a bangle on Christ)as of 193 as a hysical, )ental, an' siritual rotection #hebangle ca)e off easily an' he +as afrai' it +oul' 'ro into the ocean an' get lost #herefore, he too&it off, not &no+ing the 'anger it subecte' hi) to ! tol' .aster of this, an' he beca)e very +orrie',an' +rote aasi the follo+ing letter an' ! ?uote

DC 10, 193; E "ccor'ing to astrological la+s to 'o a+ay +ith all ba' influences of lanets,

there is nothing better than a bangle ach t+o bo'ies of the universe attract When thisa'hesive o+er of the bo'ily cells beco)es la6 +ith the a'vance of age, the lanetary ullbeco)es stronger, causing )ore la6ity of cells, inviting 'isease an' the )in' to 'isturbance

#he bangle an' its co)bination of )etal as fi6e' by the ishis e)anate electronic ray 8unseento hu)an eyes +hich counteracts all lanetary vibrations Just as a lightning ro' is affi6e' toa house to absorb the falling thun'er an' lightening, so the bangle is a lightening ro' toabsorb the ferocity of ba' lanetary rays falling on the bo'y, +hen 'isease attac&s of ba'&ar)a Besi'es, ! hear' .aster say )any ti)es that -atan creates in the )in' of the bangle

+earer the i)ulse to ta&e the bangle off, so uninterrute'ly he coul' unish the) throughthe instru)ent of ba' &ar)a of ast lives ! re)e)ber 'efinite instances of cases +ho al)ostcoul' not +ear the bangle as the ar) rotte' un'er it $ne erson ha' to change the osition

of the bangle three or four ti)es He +as cure' of aralysis an' so)e &in' of fits #he bangle +ill also )o'ify an' lessen any +rong influence on business -o)eti)es to ta&e the bangle off +hen one nee's to, even in that )o)ent, it is also 'angerous ! +rite this only to e)hasi>ethe la+s of electronic vibrations +hich (o' create' an' the ishis 'iscovere' to counteractthe evil lanetary influence on the hu)an bo'y

aasi never too& off his bangle again

+lanes

! ?uote a fe+ letters .aster +rote to aasi regar'ing his ta&ing the lanes as a )eans of travel

$C#$B 2@, 193 E "nother airlane acci'ent +ith another note' erson &ille', a ban&resi'ent of tah

112



."* 20, 193; E ich eole travel by lane because they have )oney an' they ta&e chances +ith their lives an' their &ar)a of being rich invites 'eath +hen airlane 'isasters co)e "irlane travel is not as safe as railroa' #hose +ho travele' by railroa' are all living Besi'esin'ivi'ual &ar)a, 'ifferent )achines have a correlate' &ar)a -tea) shis versus

auto)obiles, accor'ing to their in'ivi'ual &ar)as arious 'egrees of safety con'itions orother+ise bring )an to enoy or suffer accor'ingly !n other +or's, if a )an +ith goo' &ar)a'eliberately ri'es an auto in a 'angerous con'ition, 8he +ill invite the 'angerous &ar)iccon'itions of the auto too #his is the sa)e +ith airlanes #his is the +ay the la+ +or&s #hela+ is not a resector of ersons because of their goo' &ar)a "ll of us have to be careful

-P#.B 3, 19K@ E !n railroa' acci'ents, there +ere changes for so)e, but none inairlane 'isaster !t is better to get to a lace than not to get there at all .y soul shivers

+henever ! hear of an airlane acci'ent !n t+o )ore years, it +oul' have been safer for youto use the lanes Ho+ever, you enoy traveling by lane, but lease 'ont ta&e any chances

+hen the +eather is clou'y or raining Please ta&e the train then Please follo+ this a'vice,

only ta&e the best lanes, ! hoe -atan never hurts )e by hurting you for then )y bo'y too +oul' be no )ore *our loving 'ivine self is )y greatest incentive to re)ain on earthHo+ever, be +ith (o' al+ays an' re)e)ber He is al+ays +ith you, ever rotecting you .ylove an' frien'shi ever surroun' you P *oganan'a

aasi +as a very busy e6ecutive an' ti)e ele)ent )eant )uch to a business)an He starte' totravel by air as soon as transort lanes +ere available He even bought hi)self a s)all lane an'starte' ta&ing lessons in flying His teacher so&e so harshly to hi) +hile teaching that aasi'iscontinue' the lessons an' gave his lane to his younger brother #his boy +as later &ille' in afrien'7s rivate lane returning fro) a fishing tri "fter this acci'ent, aasi ro)ise' hi)self he

+oul' never fly in a rivate lane again He only travele' by large transort lanes an' +as very careful

to start out on a tri in goo' +eatherN ho+ever, a fe+ ti)es 'uring his travels, the lane ha' to turnbac& or lan' at any available airort 'ue to ba' +eather encountere' on the +ay $nce +hen he +asflying to Aos "ngeles to visit us 'uring .aster7s absence in !n'ia, there +as a terrible thun'er an'lightening stor) #hey ha' to lan' in "ri>ona

"nother ti)e one of the lanes engines caught fire an' 'roe' off #hey lan'e' safely, ho+ever, +ith the other engines

"fter .aster ca)e bac& fro) !n'ia, he as&e' aasi to give u flying for a+hile an' travel by trainan' that he +oul' tell hi) +hen the ti)e +as right for hi) to fly again aasi 'i' abi'e by .asters

+ishes, but one 'ay in 193, +e got a +ire saying to ic& hi) u at a certain ti)e at the Bilt)ore !sense' that he ha' ta&en the lane instea' of the train ! sai' nothing, but aasi tol' .aster that he

ha' flo+n in an' +ante' to be release' of his ro)ise to ta&e the trains .aster coul' say nothing butthat he +oul' as& (o' to rotect hi) all the )ore $f course, trains +ere slo+er than they are no+ !ttoo& the fe+ 'ays that aasi ha' to sen' in traveling by training an' he ha' no ti)e left to enoy theeace an' )e'itation he so )uch enoye' at the her)itage By lane, he coul' fly in si6 or seven hoursan' later in four or five hours !t )a'e a lot of 'ifference to one +hose ti)e +as li)ite'

"lthough aasi +as release' of his ro)ise, it 'i' not release .aster of his an6iety for he &ne+that aasis &ar)a +as the sa)e as that of his t+o brothers< one +as &ille' by lane an' the other bycar acci'ent #his greatly +orrie' .asterN hence, the letters he +rote of +arning about lanes, !t +asnot only aasis acci'ent &ar)a that +orrie' .aster but because aasi +as our only source of'onation to roagate our teachings or roects .aster feare' -atans subtle +ays of actions, to useaasi7s acci'ent &ar)a to re)ove hi), hence reventing that Divine soul fro) heling )any )ore

souls !t +as )y 'uty to 'rive aasi to the airort an' &no+ing our .asters 'ee concern, after aasileft the gate to boar' the lane, ! stoo' at the fence silently raying ! +oul' not be satisfie' until ! sa+

113



a light surroun'ing the laneN then ! &ne+ an' felt .asters rayers +ere rotecting hi)

$ne ti)e fro) the lane +in'o+, aasi sa+ )e ben' )y hea' in rayer !t 'eely touche' hi)an' he again starte' ta&ing the train He &et that u for a+hile, but the flying habit +as so strong inhi), he again began to travel by lane $ur oor .aster, every ti)e he rea' about a lane acci'ent, hisan6iety increase' an' +oul' +orry fro) the ti)e aasi left until he &ne+ he ha' lan'e' safely at his

'estination He +oul' as& aasi to +ire or hone uon his arrival aasi continue' to fly to the en' ofhis life "fter aasi7s first oeration in "ril 1903, he felt that he ha' to go bac& to :ansas City onbusiness He +as on'ering +hich +ay he shoul' travel by lane or train -o ! sai'O 4Why 'ont youas& .aster +hich +ay you shoul' travelO He +ill tell you the +ay it +ill be best for you4 He ans+ere',4! +ill as& hi)4

When .aster ca)e to hi) in a vision, aasi as&e' hi) .aster loo&e' at hi) an' sai', 4!n 'ueti)e, ! +ill tell you,4 an' tol' aasi that the en' of .ay +oul' be a goo' ti)e for hi) to go #he ne6tti)e aasi sa+ .aster in a vision 8+as on .ay 2, 1903 He sa+ .aster an' -ri *u&tes+ari together,so aasi so&e to .aster saying, 4.aster, if you 'ont +ant to tell )e +hich +ay ! shoul' travel, +hy'on7t you as& -ri *u&tes+ari to tell )eO4 -ri *u&tes+ari an' .aster burst into a lou' laughter an'

'isaeare' +ithout giving hi) the satisfaction of an ans+er "gain on .ay 9, 1903, +hen aasi sa+.aster that )orning, he sai', 4.aster, !7ve al+ays gone the +ay ! +ante' to travel, by air, but this ti)e! a) going by train unless you tell )e other+ise !f you +ant )e to go by air, you +ill have to tell )e4.aster s)ile' but sai' nothing

#he ti)e +as getting short an' aasi ha' not yet receive' his ans+er, so again on .ay 1K, 1903,aasi +as )e'itating an' telling the .aster, 4#ell )e +hich +ay ! shoul' travel ! +ant to lease you!f you +ant it to be the train, tell )e !f it is the lane, you tell )e ! +ant you to be lease' +ith )e4

"fter aasi finishe' tal&ing, there +as a great light -ri *u&tes+ari ca)e out of that light, an'enveloe' aasi in light an' sai', 4! rotect you through all4 .aster +as stan'ing behin' -ri

*u&tes+ari s)iling, hence, aasi got his ans+er, an' through -ri *u&tes+ari aasi too& the lane on.ay 31, 1903, for :ansas City aasi an' ! both felt that the .asters +ere letting aasi feel the

an6iety that he ha' cause' .aster to suffer 'uring his lifeti)e, because he ha' ta&en lanes

,o's

We'nes'ay, "ugust 22, 1901, ! 'rove aasi to .t Washington to see .aster During the conversation.aster +as insire' He calle' )e to bring hi) one of his orange robes scarves .aster attache' thescarf aroun' aasi7s nec& +ith his o+n -5 in While .aster +as a')iring an' bea)ing +ith oy atthe sight of aasi in the renunciate7s color of orange, ! as&e', 4-ir, +hy 'ont you give hi) an !n'ianna)eO4 .aster thoughtfully )e'itate' for a long ti)e before he foun' the na)e he +ante' ! sa+ ahay s)ile co)e over his 'ivine face as he sai'<

! thought of )any na)es, but none see)e' to lease )e, but (o' gave )e this one, aasi Jana&anan'a "t first, ! thought of the na)e, Jana&a, the &ing +ho +as also a saintly rohetan' the guru of -u& Deva, because you, li&e hi), have +orl'ly riches an' are a saint, but !

+ante' so)ething )ore for you, so ! thought of aarsi, +hich )eans, 4:ing of the -aints4

While ! +as still resent, .aster as&e' aasi to &neel before hi) Placing his han' on aasishea', he as&e' hi) to reeat the follo+ing vo+s<

! ta&e this follo+ing vo+ here, by the na)e an' co))an' of (o', Babai, Aahiri .ahasaya,-ri *u&tes+ari (urui, an' )yself

.aster sai'<

! annoint you +ith the Divine -irit an' the na)e of aasi Jana&anan'a *ou, li&e :ing

114



Jana&a, can use civilian clothes, or any clothes, inclu'ing the orange robe +hich ! +ear Withall )y love an' the (urus blessings ! re)ain ever yours,

E Para)hansa *oganan'a "(-# 22, W D%-D"* , 1901

A$- "%(A-

Both .aster an' aasi )elte' in oy of the occasion .aster +ent on to e6lain, 4 6i"idisha )eans7+ith cere)ony7, +ith fire an' incense, but your vo+ +as 6id'at , +hich )eans 7+ithout cere)ony7 !t isthe highest vo+, because it co)es 'irectly fro) (o' through the (uru4 .aster +rote the vo+s on as)all iece of aer an' gave it to aasi !t is ut a+ay +ith the rest of his treasures fro) .aster.aster 'i' not +ant anyone else to &no+ of this until he +as rea'y to announce it, on "ugust 20, 1901,the night of the initiation given by Dr Ae+is an' Bernar' #he latter art of the cere)ony, .aster

+ent 'o+n +ith aasi for the first ti)e in his orange robe .aster +as so very rou' to sho+ his littleboy in the orange robe to the ublic "t the en' of the )eeting, .aster as&e' aasi to &neel beforehi) an' again reeate' the vo+, before the ne+ly iniate' :riyabans

"t first, .aster selle' the na)e as they 'o in !n'ia +ith an 4r4 as a2arsi Aater he re)ove' the

4r4 8to )a&e it a2asi Christ)as of 1901 -ister #ara ?uestione' .aster regar'ing the 'ifference in theselling .aster e6laine' it all to us< 4a2arsi )eans 7oyal -aint7, but +ithout the 7r7 )eans 7:ing ofthe -aints7, +hich )a&es a big 'ifference to )e for that is +hat ! feel he is4 !n'ia is still critici>ing theselling +ithout the 4r4 but that is the +ay .aster +ante' it -o be it

Ra8asi Regarding Ani*als

" fe+ 'isciles sai' to )e that they hear' that aasi hate' ani)als .y ans+er to that is, 4!f his nature +as too sensitive to fish or hunt, ho+ coul' he hate the 'o)estic ets !t is only that he 'oes not +antthe) in the house because they have strong o'ors, she' their fur, an' bar& or )eo+4 5rie'a once ha'several 'ogs at one ti)e, but he +oul' not allo+ the) in the house #hey ha' to be &et in the laces

rovi'e' for the) ! re)e)ber one 'ay so)eone ha' left a &itten at the her)itage 'rive+ay #he littlething +as hungry an' ca)e crying at )y 'oor aasi hear' it an' a'vise' )e not to fee' it for, 4*oucan7t get ri' of the) after you fee' it4

Well, ! 'i' not fee' it that evening but the ne6t )orning, ! coul' not let it go hungry ! ic&e' itu an' carrie' it in )y ar)s to the north en' of the her)itage entrance to give it )il& "s ! +ascarrying it, the oor little thing loo&e' u at )e an' ! coul' see fro) its eyes 8it +as saying, 4"re yougoing to fee' )e after allO4 #he e6ression +as so vivi' that ! crie' as ! +atche' it 'rin& ! relate' thisinci'ent to aasi !t )a'e hi) feel so sorry for the &itten He tol' )e to continue to fee' it until +efoun' a lace for it #he contente' &itten ca)e aroun' +here aasi +as lying on the grass ! +as goingto revent the &itten fro) annoying hi), but to )y surrise, aasi sai', 4Aet it stay4 #he &itten +onhis heart an' the &itten ran layfully aroun' aasi7s legs, but it 'i' not co)e into the house

"nother inci'ent +as +hen aasi +as in his last illness (eorge -hinta&u brought to the house at+o=hour=ne+born goat ! too& it to sho+ aasi He +ante' to hol' the goat in his ar)s He hel' itfor at least an hour etting his ears an' tail He love' the little thing an' let us &ee it in the houseaasi +oul' laugh to see the goat run an' u) an' lay aroun' He ha' the habit of u)ing onaasi7s be' #his +as alright +hen he +as s)all but he got heavy an' on the fatal 'ay before aasi7sassing, the goat see)e' to sense that there +as so)ething +rong Before +e &ne+, +e coul' not gethi) to lay or u) as usual ! sa+ hi) )a&e a beeline for his u) on aasi7s be' ! ha' to sto hi)before he coul' )a&e the lea an' close' the 'oor, for fear he +oul' try it again an' hurt aasi !coul' see the goat +as hurt to have been stoe' He hi' behin' the 'avenort for the re)ain'er ofthe 'ay until (eorge ca)e for hi) in the evening We brought the goat bac& +ith us to .t

Washington but +e later ha' to sell hi)

115



Satan "anting to 4estro$ Ra8asi1s Bod$

ven as early as the su))er of 1901, .aster often tol' )e that aasi7s life +as in grave 'anger an'that -atan +as trying to 'estroy his bo'y When ! as&e' .aster +hy -atan +ante' to 'estroy aasi,.aster ans+ere', 7Because he has an' is still 'oing so )uch for the +or& an' is heling a lot of souls

bac& to (o' as His Divine !nstru)ent, an' -atan is trying to 'estroy it so he +on7t 'o any )ore4 Hecoul' not go to .aster7s last birth'ay arty at .ount Washington He 'i' not have a col', an' there

+as no sign of any 'isease or ain or anything +rong +ith hi) His face +as al+ays ru''y an'healthful but this ti)e he loo&e' ale

%aster1s Last ,isit to .ncinitas

January , after .aster7s birth'ay, because aasi +as not +ell, .aster ca)e to the her)itage to seehi) .aster arrive' the night before, but because it +as so late, he tol' )e not to tell aasi he +asthere, he +oul' see hi) the ne6t )orning #he follo+ing )orning .aster calle' )e to his ?uarters toas& +here aasi +as, saying, 4Don7t tell hi) ! +ant to surrise hi)4 aasi +as sitting on his lounge

chair, loo&ing out of the oen 'oor .aster stoo' at the 'oor an' loo&e' at hi) aasi, sensingso)eone, loo&e' aroun' When he sa+ it +as .aster, he u)e' fro) his chair an' ut his ar)saroun' .aster an' they interloc&e' for a long ti)e aasi )a'e .aster sit in his chair an' he ulle'his 'es& chair besi'e hi) #hey tal&e' for a long ti)e hol'ing han's aasi ha' to leave the roo) fora+hile

!n that recious ti)e, .aster as&e' )e, 4Who 'o you thin& ! +as in the 'istant astO Who coul'better +rite the (ita in this lifeO4 -everal years before, ! ha' as&e' .aster if he +as "runa, but he 'i'not ans+erN he +as not rea'y to 'ivulge his secret, an' by the +ay .aster as&e' the ?uestion, !ans+ere', 4Byasa, the +riter of the (ita4 .aster sai', 4%o, but ! re)e)ber you ha' as&e' )e yearsago if ! +as "runa4 ! oyfully e6clai)e', 4*ou +ere "runaF4 He s)ile' his 4yes4 ! then as&e' hi),4Was aasi +ith you then tooO4 He ans+ere', 4*es, he +as one of the t+in brothers, the ositive

t+in, %a&ula He +as )y favorite brother an' ! love' hi) )ore than anyone else ! +as also his (uru:rishna +as )y (uru an' Babai being :rishna in this life is still )y guru -ri *u&tes+ari +as )y guruby ro6y4 aasi returne' into the roo) .aster shortly left for #+enty=%ine Pal)s

aasi ha' to return to :ansas City 'uring the )onth of January 1902 When ! too& hi) to theairort, ! re)aine' at .t Washington for several 'ays .aster +as there He an' ! ha' a long tal& Hereeate' his 'ee +orries for the +or& an' aasi7s health an' his fear of -atan trying to 'estroyaasis bo'y He sai', 4*es, you &no+ he al+ays 'elays an' 'elays to 'o for the +or& He thin&s hehas lots of ti)e yet to 'o things for -5, but he 'oes not -atan is trying to 'estroy his bo'y4 #earsrolling 'o+n his sacre' chee&s, he a''e', 4! +oul'nt be able to live on earth +ithout hi) ! +ill leave)y bo'y consciously4 Who coul' see that belove' soul cry +ithout oining hi)O He 'rie' his tears

an' began telling,

.y 'ays, yes even the hours of )y life are nu)bere', Du ! can no longer )a&e aeals tohi) Du, +rite to hi), ho+ he +as born only to en'o+ this +or& +ith a )illion or )ore'ollars, that this +or& )ay go on after +e both 'eart fro) this earth 5or that sa)e reason,he 'i' not have chil'ren of his o+n, that this +or& an' all )ay be his chil'ren #ell hi) ho+this +or& +oul' beco)e an orhan if he an' ! +oul' both be gone, for all three of our liveshis, yours, an' )ine are e?ually in the sa)e 'anger !f he +oul' )a&e this +or& secure an'assure its continuance after +e leave, erchance it )ay e6ten' our lives for a longer erio' ofti)e

.y heart +as heavy as lea', )y )in' absorbe' in his every +or' an' enetrate' to the very'eths of )y soul #his, ho+ever, unbe&no+nst to us, +as only the beginning of a series of serioussorro+s for us ! ro)ise' ! +oul' +rite to aasi his e6act +or's, ust as soon as ! got bac& to

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ncinitas an' long enough ti)e to let aasi have a chance to assi)ilate its contents before he returne'in 5ebruary .aster reeate'ly sai', 4! a) so +orrie' about his health, Du #a&e goo' care of hi)4

#hat +as the last ti)e ! sa+ )y s+eet Belove' .aster alive When he left for #+enty=%ine Pal)sretreat, ! ca)e bac& to the her)itage to get the house rea'y for aasi7s arrival ! +rote that aealingletter an' )aile' it so he +oul' have it a +ee& before his arrival at ncinitas aasi visite' .aster in

#+enty=%ine Pal)s but t+ice "lthough aasi love' to see .aster an' love' the 'esert air, still it +asover 2@@ )iles fro) ncinitas

4esertBorrego

During )y last .t Washington tal& +ith .aster, he ha' tol' )e to have aasi buy a lace in the'esert for he sai', 4! hear there is a 'esert only 1@@ )iles fro) ncinitas Before he co)es, go overthere an' see if you fin' the lace suitable for hi) to buy lan' or a house +here he coul' sen' the

+inter )onths #here is no lace in the +orl' li&e ncinitas in the su))er, but the +inters are too'a) for hi) an' #+enty=%ine is too far He +oul' not li&e to travel so )uch, but he +oul' not)in' 1@@ )iles4 #his re?uest re)in'e' )e that in %ove)ber or Dece)ber of 1901, the cafe girls ha'ta&en )e on a icnic to Borrego -rings ! tol' .aster that ! ha' been there an' it +as a beautiful

?uiet lace an' ! +as sure aasi +oul' li&e it too .aster relie', 4(oo', 'on7t 'elay 5in' so)ethingfor hi) to sen' this +inter there #ell hi) to buy several lots so he +ont be having neighbors to'isturb hi)4

! later as&e' .rs Ae+is if she +oul' go +ith )e to Borrego to see the lace -he consente' an' +e 'rove there for a 'ays outing to investigate an' get infor)ation We sat on the groun' an' 'ug into see ho+ the un'er=soil +as an' foun' only a fe+ inches 'ee of san', the rest, goo' fertile soil forgro+ing "fter in?uiring at the real estate office, +e foun' there +ere so)e 'istricts that +ere forfar)ing an' so)e for resi'ence only We returne' to ncinitas both thrille' +ith our fin'ings

aasi ca)e a +ee& before he left for -an 5rancisco to one of his co)anies7 conventions for their20th anniversary on 5ebruary 2@, 1902 ! as&e' hi) if he +ante' to go see this 'esert area an' he

ans+ere' he +oul' after he ca)e bac& fro) -an 5rancisco -everal 'ays after he returne', ! 'rove hi)to Borrego He fell in love +ith the valley .r Jac& Benson, the bro&er, sho+e' us aroun' in a ee,going over the groun' +here there +ere no roa's, sho+ing hi) all the far) areas for sale aasi

+ante' a large far) because he sai' it cost no )ore to oerate a large far) than a s)all one, becauseyou ha' to buy the )achinery, so you )ight as +ell have lots of lan' to use the )achinery He +ante'to gro+ citrus fruit #his soil +as ust right for it +as 'eco)ose' granite an' silt an' citrus trees can

+ithstan' strong +in's Being a )an of cautious 'ecisions, +e returne' to Borrego several ti)es'uring 5ebruary an' early .arch Joe Hana'a +ent along because aasi +ante' hi) to )anage thefar) aasi ha' his )in' set on a 3@@=acre far) but the 'efinite 'ecision +as not )a'e until after.aster7s .ahasa)a'hi

! tal&e' +ith .aster over the hone a fe+ 'ays before his going an' ! tol' hi) that aasi +asconte)lating a far) 'eal He sai', 4Dont let hi) buy too large a far)4 #hen ! sai', 4aasi +ants torent a house to live in, until such a ti)e he +ants to buil' on the far)4 He ans+ere', 4#hat +oul' bealright if the o+ners +ill aint the house insi'e before he )ove' in ! 'ont li&e to have hi) go in a'irty house4 .r Benson foun' the house to rent, the one aasi bought for -5 to use after he ha'built on the far) aasi +ent to the rente' house +hich ha' ust been ne+ly ainte' in .arch after.aster7s .ahasa)a'hi service !n %ove)ber 1902, he bought that house #he ne6t )orning afterurchasing it +hich +e all &ne+ .aster +oul' have love', for it +as ust +hat he +oul' have +ante' ifhe +oul' have ha' the choice at #+enty=%ine aasi sa+ .aster in a vision, on %ove)ber 2@, 1902aasi sai' .aster +as li&e a chil' He ha' never seen .aster as hay as he +as this )orning aasisai', 4*ou &no+ ho+ hay .aster +as +hen ! 'i' things for hi) or -5 Well, that is the +ay he +as

this )orning .aster, hay, hay, hay4 aasi felt it +as because he ha' bought the houseHe live' in that house u to the last three )onths of his life at +hich ti)e his far)house +as

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built He only enoye' the far)house for these fe+ )onths before his assing aasi urchase' the3@@=acre far) an' &et a''ing )ore until he ha' 1@ acres at the ti)e of his 'e)ise "lfalfa +aslante', seven +alls +ere 'ug, an' several hun're' fruit trees +ere lante' as a tryout #here +as onehouse for the )anager, +ho +as (eorge -hinta&u an' his fa)ily, one house for the fore)an, an'another for the assistant fore)an #hirty .e6ican labor boys live' in a Butler alu)inu) bun&house,

an' there +as a searate house for a )ess hall, an' another for laun'ry an' sho+ers "lso there +as alarge ac&inghouse an' a )achinery sho +ith huge far) e?ui)ent, everything one coul' nee' forfar)ing #here +ere nine cuttings of alfalfa that first year an' lenty of vegetable gar'ens through

+hich aasi love' to +al& an' eat the ra+ vegetables fro) the groun'

Joe Hanan'a, the Jaanese gar'ener +ho +as hire' to gro+ vegetables at ncinitas, +as a s)allfar) )an an' got frightene' at the rosect of such a large far) He tal&e' (eorge -hinta&u intota&ing the ob at Borrego an' it +as for aasi7s benefit, because (eorge +as a far better )an for theob than Joe He is a har' +or&er, very honest, an' a goo' organi>er His +ife, *ona, use' to cleanaasis house once a +ee& an' 'o the laun'ry aasi treate' the) as frien's an' they in turn love'aasi 'eely "fter aasis 'e)ise, the far) +as sol' by the e6ecutor of the estate (eorge an' hisfa)ily no+ live in Aos "ngeles, +or&ing in a factory

aasi also bought the cottage near the Desert Ao'ge for -5 use ! no+ use aasi7s retreat foroccasional +ee&s7 rest !t +as at this retreat that aasi sa+ so )any visions of .aster an' all the.asters, +hich ! shall ut at the en' of this history

%aster Calls Ra8asi in %arc 9=2

When aasi arrive' fro) :ansas City, he 'i' not )ention anything about the letter ! ha' +ritten for.aster, but then that +as not surrising for he never 'i' say anything, but acte' instea' When .asterca)e bac& to .t Washington early in .arch in rearation to receive the !n'ian a)bassa'or, .astercalle' to give )e instructions to have the Ae+is7 co)e to .t Washington at a certain ti)e, to be +ithhi) +hen he +elco)e' the a)bassa'or at .t Washington He a''e', 4Why 'ont you co)e tooO4 !

ans+ere', 4*es sir, ! +ill co)e if you +ant )e to be there4 He ans+ere', 4%o, you better stay therean' ta&e goo' care of hi)4 !n that sa)e conversation, ! tol' hi) ! ha' +ritten that letter to aasi an'all he sai' +as, 4!t is too late4 ! 'i' not &no+ +hat he )eant ! also tol' hi) that aasi +asconte)lating buying a large far) for business in the 'esert that +oul' eventually co)e to -5 forinco)e "n' ! as&e' hi) if he +oul' li&e that sually .aster +as al+ays so full of enthusias), butthis ti)e he ust ans+ere' a very slo+ 4*es4 But he a''e', 4#ell hi) not to buy too large a lace4 !coul' not account for )y 'ee, 'eresse' feeling that ersiste', )in', heart, an' soul "t the sa)eti)e, ! felt a 'ee longing to see .aster again

! as&e' aasi if +e coul' go an' see .aster He ans+ere', 4*es, ust as soon as the a)bassa'ors visit is over an' .aster +ont be too busy He +ill have )ore ti)e to see us then We +ill go right after

he leaves4 .aster calle' a fe+ ti)es 'uring this erio' $ne ti)e, .aster calle', ! ans+ere', he tol')e a fe+ things about the a)bassa'or an' then as&e' to tal& to aasi, an' he tol' )e to listen in onthe other hone in case he +ante' to tal& to )e again #his ti)e .asters voice ha' a tearful tre)orsaying, 4*ou &no+ ! +oul' give any art or all of )y life to rolong your life4 ! can7t tell you ho+'eely that sun& into )y heart, but ! coul'n7t un'erstan' +hy, for )any ti)es .aster ha' so&en thus,but this ti)e it soun'e' so final But the ne6t ti)e .aster calle', he +as his hay self an' so&e +ithenthusias) an' oy that this a)bassa'or +as so resectful to hi) an' ho+ hay he +as +itheverything #here +as no trace of that for)er sa'ness in his voice or )anneris), so ! 'is)isse' any)isgiving ! felt

%aster1s %aasa*adi

$n that fatal .arch th 1902 evening aroun' 9<K0 ), aasi an' ! +ere at his 'es& +hen the honerang ! ans+ere' !t +as the oerator as&ing )e if ! +oul' accet the charge fro) Herbert 5 of

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"ri>ona, ! +as incline' to refuse for Herbert +as in the habit of calling fro) Phoeni6 for )oney an' !thought this +as one of those ti)es Herbert +as telling the oerator, 4Please tell the) to accet4 !tol' aasi this, he sai', 4!7ll ta&e the hone4 ! sa+ aasi7s e6ression fall an' he sai', 4.aster is gone4an' gave )e the hone ! &et telling Herbert to tell the 'isciles resent +ith .aster to &eereeating $. in .aster7s ear an' 'on7t sto, an' call us right bac& an' tell us if .aster is all right

"+hile later, .r 5re'eric&s calle' ! ans+ere' the hone, hoing to hear that .aster +as all right, butinstea' he tol' us that the 'octors resent in the hotel ha' ronounce' it as final

! hung u the receiver an' fro) the very 'eths of )y soul began calling .aster +ith $. alou',an' in )y agony )a'e an un&in' re)ar& to aasi 4! +ante' to go an' see .aster, but no, you +ante'to +ait !t7s al+ays +ait4 He sai' nothing, ! re)e)bere' later +hat .aster ha' tol' us +hen his.aster left this earth 4Divine .other &ne+ -he coul' not grant )e )y rayer of hol'ing .aster onearth longer -he revente' )e fro) being there +hen he left in .ahasa)a'hi4 ! fir)ly believe no+that it +as Divine .others +ish that aasi not be there +ith .aster an' ut the thought in his )in'to +ait .other &ne+ .aster7s 'ee love for aasi an' -he 'i' not +ant to 'elay .aster7s life on this)un'ane +orl' any longer

aasi +as lying on the 'ivan in a stuor +ithout a tear ! ha' to call the Ae+is7 +ho +ere in the-an Diego church giving a class or lecture When they ca)e, ! tol' the) +hat ha' haene' We )a'earrange)ents to 'rive to .t Washington, they in their car, an' aasi sai', 4! better 'rive, you are inno con'ition to 'rive tonight4 ! 'i' not )in' for ! 'ont believe ! coul' have seen the roa' any+ay

We arrive' aroun' K a) because .t Washington +as +aiting to tell us that .aster +as bac& u 8inhis roo) before +e starte' out ven then aasi 'i' not she' a tear -o)e eole are li&e that, tearscant co)e at a ti)e +hen it +oul' relieve the) )ost, but su''enly it gives vent

Ra8asi Repeats %antra -or %aster

%one of the 'ose 'isciles +ante' .aster ta&en a+ay by 5orest Aa+n until +e )a'e one last atte)tto assure ourselves that he +as not only in sa)a'hi We 'eci'e' for each one of us to reeat the

)antra .aster ha' taught us in case he +ent into 'ee sa)a'hi to bring hi) bac& into outerconsciousness aasi tol' us +hat .aster ha' sai' to hi) +hile he +as reeating the )antra in his ear4! a) $), ! a) $), nothing but $), ! a) every+here an' in everything ! +ill co)e bac& into yourbo'y an' in the consciousness of everybo'y7s bo'y4 -ince +e all +ere sure he +oul' not co)e bac&,

+e let the 5orest Aa+n )en ta&e hi) in rearation for the services in our o+n chael aasi +ante'to return to ncinitas for the fe+ 'ays that .aster +as going to be a+ay fro) .t Washington Wereturne' for the services

During the eulogy, aasi sai', 4! coul' not sea&, the +or's +oul' not co)e out, an' ! raye' to.aster saying, 7*ou +ill have to sea& through )e ! can7t74 !))e'iately his voice rang out +ith suchforce everyone notice' it We &ne+ that .aster +as sea&ing through aasi for his natural voice +as

soft an' lo+, very unli&e the one that ha' ust so&en to all What +or's are there to e6ress our feelings at our last gli)se of that Divine 5ace +e love' so

'eely "fter all +as over, the only consolation +e ha' +as +hat .aster often tol' us, 4! +ill go ahea'to reare a better lace for you all, +here +e +ill )eet again in greater glory

Ra8asi1s 0irst S$*pto*s o- Illness

"fter the services +e returne' to ncinitas aasi reste' a fe+ 'ays $ne evening he +or&e' on so)e-5 reorts for t+o hours "fter he +ent to be', there +as a long 'istance call for hi) fro) :ansasCity ! calle' hi) to the hone, but he coul' not un'erstan' +hat the erson +as saying 5inally .r

Wi'er tol' hi) that he +oul' call again in the )orning ! can7t tell you the heavy feeling ! e6erience'fro) aasi7s action over the hone !t +as li&e a 'ar& )isgiving clou' hovering over )y hea' an' the

+hole aart)ent aasi +ent bac& to :ansas City in .ay an' ca)e bac& in July to atten' ourconvocation "gain, in his seech at the gar'en arty, he coul' not sea& an' ha' to e6cuse hi)self,

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but ! thought it +as that he +as too overco)e by .asters assing an' his )antle on hi) ! ?uote ane6cert fro) .asters letter to aasi<

%$.B 23, 1932 E ! a) hay beyon' 'rea)s for if ! ever love' an' raye' foranyone, it is for one li&e you .y .asters +ish +as that ! fin' so)e +orthy ")erican that !

)ay give )y all, +hich ! have receive' fro) )y o+n guru "s )aterial +ealth can betransferre' an' +ille', so can siritual reali>ation be transferre' an' you are )y )ost belove'one to +ho) ! shall give everything -o reoiceF ! see you often bla>ing in Hi)

"fter +e got bac& to the her)itage, he began increasingly getting +orse ! coul' not un'erstan'

ho+ he +as getting +orse for he ha' no ain, but his right han' coul' not hol' things He +oul' 'rothe) $ne )orning he as&e' )e to co)e an' see if ! coul' sto the blee'ing in his ear He ha' cut it

+hile shaving !t too& )e a long ti)e to sto it ! later un'erstoo' +hy, because the tu)or +asressing the bloo' to the oen +oun' "fter that inci'ent, ! +as afrai' he +oul' severely cut hi)self !shave' hi) +ith a safety ra>or ! consulte' Dr Ae+is about his con'ition He a'vise' )e to call Dr%ovae He tal&e' +ith aasi He thought erhas it +as a s)all stro&e an' he soon +oul' get over it,

an' sai' he +oul' co)e bac& in a fe+ 'ays! ha' rea' that so)eti)es saints coul' not hol' )etal an' other things +hen they +ere in a high

state of consciousness an' ! thought that since .aster ha' sai' he +oul' ut his siritual )antle onaasi that this +as the reason for all this, for aasi ha' no ain When Dr %ovae returne', he sa+that he +as getting +orse an' as&e' if he coul' bring a frien' of his +ho +as a secialist in this fiel'

+ho +as co)ing to sent a fe+ 'ays +ith hi) at his ho)e He +oul' bring hi) in aroun' 1@ a) thene6t )orning aasi consente'

#he re)ain'er of that 'ay, ! coul' see that aasi7s +hole right si'e +as getting rogressively +orse "fter Dr aney e6a)ine' hi) on "ugust 13, 1902, he tol' )e it +as a brain tu)or an' it +asrogressing very fast, an' the sooner +e got hi) to the hosital the better, an' that they )ay even

have to oerate that sa)e evening if his brother 'ee)e' it necessary !t )ay be a )atter of hours forhis life ! calle' the Ae+is7 an' tol' the) #hey offere' to 'rive us to the (oo' -a)aritan Hosital, ! +ent in to hel hi) get rea'y to leave i))e'iately after lunch for Aos "ngeles #his +as the secon'greatest shoc& of our lives an' ust five )onths after losing our belove' .aster *ou can +ell i)agineour state of )in' aasi +ent through a series of e6a)inations to locate the tu)or the ne6t )orningugene Aynn, aasi7s favorite nehe+, one +ho) he thought of as a son, an' .r Challinor 'i' not

+ant the) to oerate until they ha' several secialistsV a'vice aasis life +as )ore an' )ore on the verge of 'eath, until they finally ha' to oerate We ha' the assurance that the aney brothers +ere toin this country Dr an' .rs Ae+is ha' to ta&e the train bac& after they left us off at the hosital "tthe station he )et his 'octor fro) -an Diego an' Dr Ae+is as&e' hi) if he &ne+ this Dr aney #he'octor tol' hi) that they are the best in this country Dr Ae+is +as so relieve' he calle' )e fro) the

station to tell )e this reassuring ne+s

0irst Operation

aasi +as oerate' on "ugust 1K, 1902, bet+een 3<3@ an' <3@ ) aasi7s life +as sare' through.aster7s grace an' self=sacrifice He ha' three rivate nurses on three shifts in atten'ance "roun'three o7cloc& that )orning, he +o&e u an' as&e' the nurse if they ha' foun' out +hat +as the )atter

+ith hi) He +as bright an' cheerful, he tal&e' an' laughe' +ith the 'octors #hey as&e' hi) to raisehis right ar) an' leg +hich coul'nt )ove before He raise' the) both high #he 'octors +ere alla)a>e' "fter an oeration of that sort, the atient 'oesn7t act li&e that so ?uic&ly "ll the 'octorscoul' not un'erstan' He +as the )iracle )an of the hosital

$n the fourth )orning, ! ca)e in as usual His bac& +as turne' to )e He sai' in a very strong voice +hich 'i' not soun' li&e hi) at all, 4(ive )e a :leene64 !t soun'e' )ore li&e .aster thanaasis voice !t struc& )e very forcibly When ! +ent bac& to .t Washington that evening, ! tol' a

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fe+ 'isciles +hat a eculiar feeling ! ha' ha' +hen ! hear' hi) say, 4(ive )e a :leene64

,isions

$n "ugust 2@, ! ca)e in, aasi +as incline' in a sitting osition on his be', an' he +as crying Hetol' )e in a tearful voice,

Do you &no+ +hat ! sa+O ! have ha' a very, very ba' e6erience ! sa+ -atan in a very 'ar&for), everything +as blac&, -atan +as ta&ing on 'ifferent ugly for)s an' +as trying to getafter )e He even trie' leaing fla)es to 'estroy )e ven though the fla)es ca)e near, theycoul'n7t touch )e "n' through the fla)es, ! coul' see houses an' eole going throughthe), an' the fla)es +ere trying to 'estroy the) !t +as terrible, so very a+ful !f anyonetries to tell )e there is no -atan, ! can tell the) other+ise for ! have seen hi) ! +as sofrightene' ! trie' to get out of that evil force #hen all 'isaeare' an' only 'ense 'ar&nessre)aine' !n a corner in far=off sace, ! sa+ the tiniest little light e6an'e' into the for) of-ri *u&tes+ari With his co)ing, all the 'ar&ness vanishe' an' He s)ile' at )e an' sai', 4"llis +ell no+4 #hen Babai, Aahiri .ahasaya, .aster, an' even Jesus ca)e before )y vision

Hence, .asters rohecy at the ti)e aasi +as reeating the )antra in .aster7s ear, 4! shallco)e bac& into your bo'y4 He 'i' co)e bac& an' occuie' aasis bo'y fro) "ugust 13 =2@, 1902!t +as .aster +ho +as tal&ing, )oving his li)bs, an' it +as also .aster +ho as&e' )e for a :leene6-everal 'ays after "ugust 2@, aasi tol' )e that he as&e' .aster if he coul' tell us +hat ha' transire'at the ti)e of his oeration an' for seven 'ays after+ar's "n' .aster ans+ere', 4!f you +ant toaasi sai'<

.aster stee' into )y bo'y an' occuie' it fro) the ti)e of the oeration an' for seven'ays thereafter ! +as in the ether out of )y bo'y for ! 'i' 'ie on the oerating table but.aster brought )e bac& by occuying )y bo'y 'uring that crucial erio'

#he follo+ing story +as tol' to us by .aster !t illustrates the o+er a )aster +ill use to save a'iscile "t the sa)e ti)e, it e6lains ho+ )asters can save 'isciles fro) 'eath &ar)a, an' ho+-+a)i -han&ara +as converte' to :riya *oga -+a)i -han&ara +as &no+n to be one of !n'ia7sgreatest astrologers of his ti)e Whenever he re'icte' an event, it al+ays ca)e to ass " 'iscile ofBabai7s +ent to see this great astrologer -han&ara tol' this 'iscile that on the seventh night he +oul''ie by lightning #he 'iscile +as 'istraught at the rosect of his co)ing 'eath He +ent to Babaian' tearfully tol' hi) the story Babai tol' the 'iscile to go bac& to the astrologer an' 4tell hi) thatyou +ill not 'ie by lightning on the seventh night4 When -han&ara hear' this, he tol' the 'iscile,4#ell your .aster that if you 'o not 'ie on the seventh night, ! +ill thro+ all )y astrology boo&s intothe (anges an' follo+ hi) ! 'ont thin& ! +ill nee' to, for the stars never fail4

$n the )orning of the eighth 'ay, the 'iscile +ent bac& to -han&ara to sho+ hi) that he ha' not'ie' as re'icte' -han&ara, a )an of his +or', thre+ his boo&s into the (anges an' follo+e' the'iscile to his .aster7s hut Babai s)ile' -han&ara bo+e' in 'ue resect to the great .aster an'as&e', 4#his )an, accor'ing to all in'ications, +as to lose his life by lightning last night Ho+ is it thathe 'i' not 'ieO4 Babai ans+ere', 4*ou +ere right His bo'y, accor'ing to his &ar)a, +as to have beenelectrocute' last night by lightning, but ! +asn7t4 But -han&ara sai', 4! +as not re'icting your 'eath44#rue,4 Babai sai' 4Aast night ! tol' this )an to co)e to )y hut an' slee on )y be' He 'i' so

#his )orning he tol' )e he ha' a very vivi' 'rea) that he sa+ lightning laying aroun' hi) an' itstongues of fla)es trying to 'estroy his bo'y -till the fla)es 'i' not co)e near hi) ! ha' slie' intohis bo'y, therefore rotecting hi) against the onslaught of 'eath !t +as not )y ti)e to go, so +e both

live4$ur Belove' .aster 'i' li&e+ise so aasi7s life )ay be sare' to co)lete his )ission to+ar'

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-5 .aster +rote to aasi on -ete)ber 19, 1932, an' ! ?uote< 4! shall be +ith you in the last 'ayan' beyon' +hen ! )ay be of )ost service to you4 #his +as aasis last 'ay an' .aster &et hisro)ise of the greatest service, +hich no other hu)an being coul' erfor) for hi) "nother ?uote<

J% 11, 1930 E !n the ocean, in the hall, in the roo), in the s&y, ! see your belove' i)age

What oy you have brought to this +or& an' to )e #hough you e6ect no re+ar', in heaven! shall give you infinite +ealth an' blessings an' unen'ing oy on earth very 'ay half of )y)e'itation ! install in your astral storehouse Aots of astral riches are being store' for you

*ou +ill nee' the) in the long, long ourney +hen, for a ti)e, +e +ill aarently art an' yet! +ill +atch over you all the ti)e

"n' still another ?uote fro) .asters letter to aasi<

DC.B , 1930 E When all +ill see) 'ar& an' still you go on 'oing an' +or&ing forHer, -he +ill Herself co)e to your rescue

-till another<

JA* 21, 1930 E *ou +ill be longer here on earth than ! ! +ill re)ain until )y +or& isfinishe' *ou have greatly hele' to +or& out )y 'estine' tas&

Satan Still Tr$ing to 4estro$ Ra8asi

Ho+ very right .aster +as, that -atan +as trying to 'estroy aasi7s bo'y When he coul' not get hi),he trie' several ti)es He +as still in the hosital 'uring the first oeration While the nurse +as out ofthe roo), he 'ran& so)e +ater When he finishe', he )isse' the table an' the glass fell to the flooran' bro&e into ieces #he nurse too& articular recautions to clean the floor thoroughly Aater +hen! ca)e, aasi ha' to go to the bathroo) His sliers +ere on the high footstool near his be' He ut

the) on an' +hen he ca)e bac&, sai', 4#here is so)ething in there4 ! loo&e' an' there +as a larget+o=inch iece of bro&en glass in it He ha' stee' on it an' +al&e' bac& an' forth +ithout a scratch

" +orse inci'ent haene' +hen he +as bac& at the her)itage .rs -lavos often &in'ly )a'e hi)so)e ho)e)a'e yogurt +hich he enoye' !f aasi ha' been li&e so)e of us +ho al)ost s+allo+ ourfoo' +hole, 8but aasi che+e' everything he ate, inclu'ing li?ui's, he )ay have ha' a very seriousinternal inury While he +as eating so)e fresh yogurt, his teeth struc& so)ething har' He ulle' itout of his )outh !t +as a shar, t+o=ointe'=e'ge, inch=long iece of bro&en glass ! insecte' theglass fro) +hich he +as eating an' the others that +ere in the icebo6, but none ha' a bro&en iece offof the) .rs -lavos loo&e' in her &itchen but coul' not fin' +here it ca)e fro) !t )ay have been inthe )il& she ha' use' !t +as so shar that if he ha' s+allo+e' it, it coul' have &ille' hi) "gain, ourBelove' .aster rotecte' hi)

very 'ay +hile aasi +as in the hosital, he ha' so)e ne+ visions to tell )e about He has oftensai', 4*ou 'ont &no+ ho+ )uch .aster is a+are of you all,4 or 4.aster is )ore +ith you all than heever +as,4 +hich &et us encourage' an' brought hi) closer to our hysical )in's ! ?uote so)e ofthe visions aasi ha' +hile he +as in the hosital bet+een "ugust 2@ an' -ete)ber 22, 1902< 4! see-ri *u&tes+ari a lot4 When ! as&e' hi), 4Dont you see .aster tooO4, he ans+ere', 4He co)es too,but -ri *u&tes+ari sent .aster so)e+here to 'o so)ething4 $ne )orning +hen ! ca)e in his roo),he as&e' )e<

Do you &no+ ! sa+ -ri *u&tes+ari hol'ing little .aster7s hea' on his la an' etting hi) li&ea little boy, an' .aster +as so hay, he loo&e' u at -ri *u&tes+ari +ith his big eyes an'

+ith such loveO Aoo&ing at the) both, ! )elte' in .aster7s oy an' there +e +ere both in -ri *u&tes+ari7s la ! have not seen that 'ar&ness again !t +as li&e 8! fell off an' no+ only

122



.aster re)ains Whatever ! say or +hat ! 'o, it is .aster +ho is saying it, it is not )e ! 'on7tfeel )yself any)ore Just .aster all the ti)e !t is he +ho is blessing !t is he +ho is tal&ing !tis he +ho is +al&ing, everything is .aster, little .aster every+here

4ven though you 'o not see .aster,4 aasi +as telling a grou of us, 4.aster is very )uch

a+are of you all ! ?uote a letter .aster +rote to aasi in 5ebruary<

5B 2, 1930 E "l+ays re)e)ber this, +hether ! a) in this bo'y or not .y love is your'oor to His :ing'o), ! often feel you in )y boso) li&e a srea'ing light in'escribable #+olights oine' together eternally stretching in sace ! a) hay that ! )et you

"nother on .ay 20, 1930<

#his is the truth *ou are everything that is Divine to )e, an' in you )y highest siritual'esires are fulfille' ! +ante' to live in so)ebo'y after ! a) gone, an' ! a) hay ! a) livingin you *ou are )y 'ivine chil' #hrough you )y life shall give salvation to )any an' bring

the) bac& to the )ansion of (o'

aasi +as 'ischarge' fro) the Hosital after a )onth #he t+o aney 'octors a'vise' a series of6=ray treat)ents for hi) #hey ic&e' a goo' 'octor in Aa Jolla so he +oul' not have to go too far

"fter a +ee&7s rest, he starte' the treat)ents five 'ays a +ee& for three )onths, an' one )onths7 restin bet+een aasi continue' having visions, ! ?uote a fe+ here<

-P#.B 22, 1902 E ! +as lying on )y si'e +hen .aster ca)e ! su''enly beca)e ass)all as a baby, innocent, +ithout +orries, or a care in the +orl'

$n -ete)ber 2;, 1902, aasi +as tal&ing to a grou of us an' rubbing over his heart, sai'<

#his is +here you +ill feel .aster Bring all your consciousness here an' you +ill feel little.aster He is here Bring your consciousness fro) the coccy6 to the heart, you +ill see an'feel Aittle .aster there !t is not ! ! have co)lete'ly lost the consciousness of )y o+n self!t is all .aster .aster ta&ing, .aster +al&ing, an' .aster sea&ing because .aster isevery+here ! 'ie' +hen ! +ent on the oerating table !t is he +ho is occuying this bo'yno+

$n -ete)ber 3@, 1902, aasi sai'<

.aster has tol' )e, 4Don7t )e'itate too strenuously or go u an' 'o+n the sine Just rela6

in )e an' in your heart !f you )a&e too har' an effort you +ill go out of your bo'y Just feelan' be +ith )y consciousness +ithout effort an' ! +ill be in you4

0ire In Ra8asi1s Apart*ent

!n late $ctober, it +as cool enough to be able to go to Borrego for +ee&en's "fter his 5ri'ayafternoon treat)ent, +e 'rove 'irectly to the 'esert !n %ove)ber, +e left for his usual 5ri'ayafternoon treat)ent an' then +ent on to the 'esert #he follo+ing 'ay or the ne6t, the Ae+is7une6ecte'ly 'rove u the 'rive+ay to the house ! +as surrise' to see the) but thought they ha'co)e for a visit, but they +ere bearers of ba' ne+s #hey tol' )e first that there ha' been a fire inaasi7s aart)ent be'roo) ! ha' left the electric blan&et on fro) #hurs'ay night, but ! ha' +i'elysrea' it over a chair in the corner 5ri'ay afternoon after +e left, *oshio Ha)a'a +ent over to clean

a2asi used the 'ord ;Little Master> a great deal during this (eriod as an endearing ter!* e 'ould !elt in 2o as he !entioned ;Little Master>*

123



the aart)ent, too& the srea'e' blan&et an' bun'le' it on the chair to vacuu) un'er it !t +asalrea'y very hot an' +ithout the air !t caught fire 'uring the early )orning hours

%ina, +ho live' in the north en' of the her)itage, got u very early to go over to the office to utout the hall lights -he hear' a constant bu>>ing soun' an' beca)e alar)e' an' calle' Dr Ae+is +hoca)e right over an' +ith great 'ifficulty ut the fire out +ith the e6tinguisher Previously, ! ha' an

electric ush button installe' fro) aasi7s be'roo) to a bu>>er in the outsi'e hall in case he nee'e')e an' coul' not get to the interco) hone +hich +as at a 'istance fro) his be' #he +ires +ere inthe floor belo+ +here the fire starte' When the fire touche' the +ires, it set the bu>>er off #his +asthe bu>> +hich caught %ina7s attention #his an' %ina7s ?uic& action, save' the +hole her)itage fro)co)letely going u in fla)es $f course, +e &ne+ that our .aster ha' the suerhan' in the )atter

.il're' Ae+is a'vise' us to re)ain at Borrego for the aart)ent +as in a sa' state -he, Doctor,.r -lavos, an' another )an ha' ta&en the +hole aart)ent aart an' re)ove' the rugs an' furnitureto clean ven )y roo) belo+ +as 'a)age' ! thought +e coul' stay in the north en' of theher)itage, but aasi +ante' to re)ain in Borrego for the 'uration of the renovating of the aart)entan' )y roo) ! ha' to 'rive bac& an' forth five 'ays a +ee& to Aa Jolla for his treat)ents ! )ust say !

+as hay +hen the +ee&en' ca)e an' +e 'i' not have to 'rive t+o hun're' )iles a 'ay aasi7 lasttreat)ent +as on Dece)ber 2K, 1902 #he girls +ere all co)ing after .t Washington Christ)as'inner to be +ith aasi an' )e for Christ)as night !t +as an e6tre)ely sa' Christ)as for it +as thefirst +ithout our Belove' .aster .rs Ae+is &in'ly ut a very beautiful, 'ecorate' tree in aasi7sroo) for the occasion

We returne' to Borrego the 'ay after Christ)as an' re)aine' until the aart)ent +as rebuilt an'furnishe' .rs Ae+is, bless her heart, +as so &in' -he )anage' everything for )e an' 'i' all the 'irty

+or& of )oving, cleaning, having everything sent to the cleaners for every stitch ha' to be cleane' toget the s)o&e out What a terrific ob she ha' #he fire insurance fro) aasi7s Co)any ai' all thebills We +ere all very hay +ith the results of a little fire +hich 'i' not a)ount to )uch but the

+ater an' s)o&e 'a)age

%ore ,isions

During the +inter )onths of 1902 an' 1903, aasi ha' very +on'erful e6eriences +ith .aster an'the other .asters $n Dece)ber , 1902, aasi sa+ all the .asters, Babai, Aahiri .ahasaya, -ri

*u&tes+ari, an' .aster ! ?uote so)e of the visions 'uring that erio' $n January 0, 1903 the firstbirth'ay celebration after .aster7s .ahasa)a'hi, .t Washington sent to aasi in the 'esert, a ieceof .aster7s birth'ay ca&e "fter aasi ate the ca&e, +hich he never 'i' before, he sat very still an' sai'<4.aster has co)letely absorbe' )e He is lease' that ! ate the ca&e in his na)e 8not because ofeating the ca&e, but that aasi +oul' eat it ust to lease .aster #hat night aasi sai',

Aast night after ! lai' 'o+n, ! +ent into a 'ee )e'itation an' ! foun' )yself in a vast hall, +here a large grou ha' gathere' *ou &no+ Babai create' a gol'en castle for Aahiri.ahasaya Well, Babai create' one li&e that for .asters birth'ay ! +as stan'ing at one si'e

+ith other eole +hen our Aittle .aster +al&e' in *ou have never seen nor +ill you eversee a )ore beautiful youth He is so young loo&ing, his face an' s)ile ra'iant +ith such oyHe +as so hay His +al& +as light, vigorous, an' so full of light an' oy He ha' a robe on,! suose to reresent his earthly birth !t +as li&e the robe he use' to +ear but yet so'ifferent !t fitte' s&in=li&e an' +hen he +al&e', it 'i' not flutter or )ove li&e a robe 'oes

+hen one +al&s !t +as as though it +as a art of his bo'y !t ha' so )any colors +ith the)ost beautiful blue you have ever seen an' it ha' a gol' ban' about three inches +i'e that'rae' coil=li&e aroun' hi) !t +as brilliant But not blin'ing to loo& at He +as +al&ing

to+ar's a throne He stoe' to greet an' tal& +ith this one an' that one as he asse' by !have never seen hi) so ra'iant an' hay, everything an' everyone +as full of oy, oy ! +asabsorbe' in that oy but ! +as hurt that .aster 'i' not co)e over to greet )e too

124



$n January 19, 1903, aasi sai'<

! sa+ .aster stan'ing in a grou sho+ing the) a certain techni?ue Babai an' .aster +ereboth sho+ing this techni?ue to )e an' ho+ ! shoul' 'o it Babai +as laying 'o+n an' he

even turne' aroun' on his si'e an' +ith his finger sho+e' )e ho+ it +as 'one

-everal 'ays later, aasi sai'< 4Babai again sho+e' )e that sa)e techni?ue !t is a techni?uesecially for )e because of the oeration4 $n January 2, 1903, aasi +as out +al&ing on his far) atsunset !t +as a beautiful s&y He relate' the inci'ent to )e<

! +as +al&ing fast, )y ace beca)e slo+er, an' it ca)e so ! coul' not )ove )y feet an' ha'to sto an' ! face' the ast "s ! 'i' so, a very bright light aeare' in the s&y !n that light.asters beautiful face aeare' He ha' a very lease' s)ile "fter the vision vanishe', ! +asable to +al& again

$n 5ebruary 10, 1903, aasi +ent for his usual evening +al& When he ca)e bac&, he sai', 4"s ! +as +al&ing 'o+n the roa' a bit, .aster stoo' before )e 8an' sai' to )e< 7Babai +ants you7 #hen !sa+ Babai stan'ing before )e4 aasi 'i' not say +hat Babai +ante' of hi) or sai'

$n 5ebruary 2, 1903, +hen ! as&e' aasi if he ha' seen .aster lately, he ans+ere', 4%o, .asteris gone so)e+here, 'oing so)ething ! haven7t lost contact +ith hi) but he is very busy #he other.asters co)e, though4 $n .arch 1, 1903, one of the boys ha' as&e' if he coul' go to 'ifferentcenters aroun' the country to lecture aasi +as as&e' to see& .aster7s oinion in the )atter "fter hisevening )eal, aasi lai' his hea' on his ar) resting on the table ! +ent over to see if he +as all rightHe loo&e' at )e an' ans+ere'<

! +as getting the ans+er about the boy going out to lecture !t ca)e 'irect fro) -ri

*u&tes+ari an' he sai' to )e, 4! 'on7t +ant those +ho have ersonal a)bitions or +ho +antto go out loo&ing for flattery nor +ho have selfish ai)s ! only +ant those to go out to givethese teachings +ho are unselfish an' +ho love (o' only an' have so)e reali>ation %onebut these shoul' go out to teach4 #hen all the .asters ca)e an' .aster +as in the center ofthe)

$n .arch , 1903, ! +as telling aasi, 4!t +as a year ago to the hour that our Belove' .aster leftus so alone4 aasi ans+ere' by saying<

.aster is very )uch +ith )e to'ay an' he tol' )e, 4! too felt the sting of leaving ! 'i' not +ant to leave you all ! ha' no attach)ent to anything or anyone, but ! 'i' not +ant to cause

you all so )uch sorro+ by )y leaving #his en's a full year +ithout )e !t +ill be easier tobear fro) no+ on4

aasi a''e', 4.aster love' us so )uch4 $n .arch 2, 1903, aasi sai', 4-ri *u&tes+ari +as +ith )e all 'ay in a great brilliant light4 $n .arch 2;, 1903, aasi +as +al&ing aroun' his 'esertretreat ! +ent out to see if ! coul' get hi) anything He loo&e' at )e an' ans+ere'<

! tell you ! cannot feel )y bo'y at all !t is .aster +ho is +al&ing !t is ust li&e he is in )ybo'y an' ! ersonally 'ont e6ist When ! a) +al&ing ! feel .asters bo'y s+aying in )ine !feel his )uscles in )y )uscles ! feel his hea' in )y hea' !t is not ! +ho is +al&ing no+ but.aster

.ay 0, 1903 E #hat )orning aasi sai'<

125



siritual eye to the ne+ :riyabans !t +as a long ti)e to stan' He su''enly sat 'o+n an' he ha' toleave the roo) While he +as lying on the 'ivan in .aster7s library ustairs E he +as left alone for usta fe+ )inutes E he receive' this vision $n "ugust 22, 1902, aasi tol' )e<

! have seen .aster fro) the heart u, but this ti)e ! sa+ hi) in a very brilliant light an' in it,

! sa+ .aster7s entire for) #here +as only a very thin veil bet+een hi) an' co)lete)ateriali>ation in hu)an for)

! often rea' so)e of .aster7s letters to aasi #his one ! rea' to hi) +as +ritten in 1933 an' it +as articularly s+eet, .aster e6ressing a great love for hi) aasi sai' nothing an' +ent to hisroo) He ca)e bac& shortly an' stoo' in the )i''le of the roo) an' see)e' to be in an ecstatic)oo' He +as reeating, 4"ll is oy, nothing but oy, love, nothing but love, ecstasy, full of oy an'love fro) all the .asters4 He a''e', 4"ll the .asters ca)e to )e an' they ust fille' )e +ith suchlove an' so full of oy4 aasi7s face shone He +as so elate' that he coul' not har'ly contain the lovean' oy he felt

Ra8asi Tells o- 6i)ing %illions to SR0!t +as 'uring this su))er ofl903 +hen ugene Aynn visite' his uncle on business He an' aasi +ere

+al&ing on the la+n tal&ing, ! +as in Daya7s be'roo) tal&ing to .atai an' Daya We +ere stan'ing atthe +in'o+ loo&ing at the) assing by aasi sa+ us #hey both ca)e over to the +in'o+ aasi tol'us, 4! )a'e arrange)ents for -5 to be the beneficiary of )y life insurance of half a )illion 'ollarsBy the ti)e ! a) through 'oing things for -5, it +ill have fro) three, four, yes, even si6 )illion inassets to its cre'it #hat shoul' lease .aster4 %ee'less to say, ho+ rofuse +e +ere in ourareciation an' than&s +ith our 4$h7s4 an' 4"h7s4 fro) us all

Weather er)itting, aasi +as bac& to Borrego for the +inter of 1903 an' 190K "gain, thefollo+ing are visions he ha' in the 'esert $n Dece)ber , 1903, aasi +as saying, 4! 'on7t feel )yself

at all !ts ust .aster When his oy co)es, ! cry4 $n Dece)ber ;, 1903, aasi 'i' not give anye6lanation but all he sai' +as, 4.aster sure li&es Babai4 $n Dece)ber 9, 1903, aasi +as as&e' byseveral ersons, 4Why 'oesn7t .aster sho+ hi)self to )eO4 .aster gave aasi the ans+er, 4#hey )ustco)e to )e through )e'itation an' light, not )e co)e 'o+n to the), but they u to )e4 $n January0, 190K, aasi sai'<

! a+o&e aroun' t+o or three o7cloc& in the )orning an' ! sa+ Aahiri .ahasaya in the greatestbla>e of light ! have ever seen #hen one by one, -ri *u&tes+ari, Babai, an' then .aster.aster lifte' )e out of the bo'y an' +e floate' together over )any gatherings of eole,even to !n'ia .aster blesse' each grou as +e floate' over the) We +ere not +al&ing, butfloating overhea' !t see)e' as though .aster +ante' all the eole to &no+ that ! +as +ith

hi) ! +as +ith .aster a long ti)e fro) +a&ing to 9 a) #his is the longest ti)e ! have been +ith hi) this +ay .aster is very busy there, ust as )uch so as he +as here, heling eole inthese other sheres, teaching the) the +ay of salvation an' ho+ to achieve self=reali>ationthe)selves

January 12, 190K, aasi ha' )any )ore hours +ith .aster, again visiting )any laces, .astersho+ing the grou the +ay to salvation, traveling afloat over the grou $n January 1, 190K, again !as&e' aasi if .aster ha' co)e last night an' if .aster ha' sai' anything aasi ans+ere', 4*es,.aster ca)e but he 'i' not say anything He ust ca)e to see )e4

%en -ro* India ,isit Ra8asi

January 1;, 190K, again ! as&e' aasi if .aster ca)e to give certain ans+ers to ?uestions +e +ante'hi) to as& .aster aasi ans+ere', 4*es, .aster ca)e again, but he 'i' not have any ans+ers He ust

127



of the), 'uring the t+enty years of .aster correson'ing +ith aasi regar'ing the +or& Whenever !foun' so)e, an' there +ere )any beautiful assages in +hich .aster articularly e6resse' 'ee lovefor hi), ! rea' the) to hi) $nce, after ! finishe' rea'ing a assage, he crie', saying, 4! 'i' not &no+he love' )e so )uch4 "lso, in one of those +on'erful letters, ! rea' one of .asters financial aealsan' at the en' of the letter, he sai', 4!f ! 'ont aeal to you, there +ill be no one to 'o it after ! a)

gone4 .y heart an' )in' ans+ere' .aster, 4%ever )in', Aittle -ir, ! +ill carry on for you, in theseaeals,4 an' ! 'i' at every oortunity ! ha'

During the +inter ofl902, ! even +rote aasi a letter re)in'ing hi) of his 'uties of )a&ing this +or& secure !t +as a tye+ritten letter not too long but to the oint ! coul' +rite it better an' rea' itto hi), for ! rea' all his )ail an' ne+saer articles for hi) 5or if ! tal&e', he +oul' ust say, 4%otno+ "fter ! a) better4 ! +ante' to ut )y oint over, so ! as&e' if ! coul' rea' a letter to hi) ! satbehin' hi) so ! +oul' not have to see his face, for if ! sa+ his hurt e6ressions, ! coul' not go on

"fter ! finishe' rea'ing the letter, he calle' )e to his si'e ! &nelt besi'e hi) He blesse' )e Withtears in his eyes, he sai', 4! &no+ ! have not co)lete' )y )ission yet, but ust as soon as ! a) better! +ill ta&e care of everything4 #he fulfill)ent of this 'uty +as the +eight +hich +as lifte' fro) bothaasi7s an' )y )in's 5or he ha' co)lete' the urose for +hich he +as born in this life the very

thing .aster +ante' that the +or& +oul' continue to rogress after both their bo'ies ha' )elte' intothe !nfinite

Ra8asi1s Second Operation

aasis secon' oeration +as on "ril 2, 190K Bet+een the erio' of "ril 23 E 2, aasi tol' )ethat he ha' seen .aster, saying, 4$h, .aster is +ith )e all the ti)e He is hay, hay He is in )eHe is so hay He is nothing but oy, oy all the ti)e4 aasi a''e', 4.aster is hay because ! turne'over those stoc&s for -5 an' that ! have finishe' )y 'uty on this earth4

While +e +ere +aiting for the )en to ta&e aasi to the oerating roo), he +as very cal) an'loo&e' as if he +as loo&ing for+ar' to a )eeting +ith .aster instea' of another oeration He loo&e'

so blissful an' hay ugene Aynn an' ! +ere on each si'e of his be' He too& ugenes an' )yhan' in each of his han's an' sai', 4Junior, before Durga, ! +ant to say this, that you are going to bethe successor of )y business ! +ant you to ta&e care of -5 the sa)e +ay ! have ta&en care of it -5shoul' co)e first, last, an' al+ays in your thoughts to hel it4 ugene loo&e' at )e +ith tears in hiseyes an' sai', 4Durga, ! 'ont &no+ +hat a guru )eans, but to )e that is +hat ncle Ji))y is to )eHis +ishes are )ine4 We then )e'itate' until they ca)e for hi) His face +as still blissful We staye'until he ca)e out of the oerating roo)

When ! sa+ hi) the ne6t )orning, he +as very ?uiet He loo&e' at )e an' s+eetly s)ile' He 'i'not have any ain Just before he left the hosital, the afternoon nurse, +ho too& care of hi) after heca)e bac& fro) the oerating roo), sai', 4*ou &no+, you can al+ays tell a atient before he co)es

out of anesthesia *ou can al+ays tell +hat a )an is li&e by his subconscious )in'4 -he continue', 4!have never in )y e6erience seen anybo'y as eaceful an' ?uiet an' as angelic as .r Aynn +as +henhe +as in his subconscious )in' !t +as li&e he +as the incarnation of (o' His face +as so illu)ine'! have never e6erience' anything as beautiful as that, an' ! 'on7t thin& ! ever +ill again4 5or a erfectstranger to say that )a'e )e reali>e all the )ore that .aster +as shining through aasi ! ?uote a fe+e6certs of letters fro) .aster to aasi<

."* 20, 1932 E %o+ the sa)e o+er is to be use' to acco)lish so)ething lasting at .t Washington #hen our t+in &ar)as +ill be free, then +e +ill be free to roa) in the -irit inever bubbling oy

J"%"* 2@, 193K E When your +or& +ill be finishe' you +ill shine in Her Boso) as a)ost Belove' chil' an' +e +ill sing an' lay )any lives to bring others bac& to Her .ansion *ou are ever +ith )e an' ! +ith you in our 5ather eoice for the :ing'o) of (o' is yours

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5B"* 1;, 193K E *ou +ill never &no+ +hat great art you have laye' an' are layingin this great Babai7s +or&, an' those that are !nstru)ents of the .ost High sit on #heirthrone *ou are not only heling )e to hel this +or& but you are 'irectly cooerating +iththe (reat $nes ! &no+ fro) actual vibrations they are sure)ely lease' +ith you ! hate tothin& +hat struggles +e +oul' have )et +ithout (o' sen'ing you to us *ou are laying an

e?ual art in this +or& as !, unli&e Plato7s stallions, turne' not heaven+ar' an' anotherearth+ar', but +e both are ulling the chariot of this )ove)ent to one goal of Divinefulfill)ent Both are necessary to 'ra+ this Divine vehicle to its goal 'irecte' by the (reat$nes When you +ill fulfill your highest )ission on earth in fir)ly establishing this +or&,then you an' ! +ill be release' of our 'uty on earth forever #hen +e +ill freely stay inHeavenN other+ise, +e +ill be force' to co)e bac& But +hen +e are free +e )ay ta&e tristo the earth freely, to loa' our boats +ith siritually shi+rec&e' souls an' bring the) to theshores of heaven ! +rite this no+ as ! see this vision, sitting on )y roof un'er the sunencircle' by the !nfinite

"(-# 20, 193K E Wor's fail to tell +hat you )a&e )e feel, that you are trying an'

actually bringing this +or& out of the a+s of untol' trials .any incarnations, if you chooseto ly your boat to earth to ta&e others to Divine .others shore, you +ill enoy untol'roserity )aterially an' siritually

$C#$B 1, 193K E ! hate to thin& +hat +oul' haen to this +or& if you an' ! are ta&ensu''enly in the boso) of the 5ather #his is the resonsible thought that the Heavenly 5atherconstantly tells )e *ou an' ! )ust er)anently establish this +or& so that any )e +e arecalle' to Heaven +e shall be able to tell the), +e ensure' the continuance of the +or& against'estructive o+er of -atan 'uring our earthly absence %ot until then you an' ! +ill be free

Ra8asi Builds /is Apart*ent at /ead5uarters

Whenever aasi ca)e to visit .t Washington, +hile our Belove' .aster +as still +ith us, .aster)ove' out of his be'roo) an' staye' in his library, un'er ours an' aasis rotestations .aster also

+ille' aasi his .t Washington living ?uarters, for aasi ha' none But aasi an' all of us 'eci'e'that .aster7s be'roo) shoul' be &et ust as .aster left it, as a shrine #herefore, this left aasi +ithonly the library to stay #he .arch of .aster7s .ahasa)a'hi, aasi +as electe' the secon' Presi'entof -5 !, an' all, felt he shoul' have a lace of his o+n to live in +hen he ca)e to .t Washington, !ha' loo&e' at the oen to+er an' sa+ the ossibility of )a&ing a +on'erful, ?uiet lace, an' suggeste'to hi), 4Why 'on7t you let us buil' you an aart)ent on the to+erO *ou can have a bath an'&itchenette *ou 'on7t have a lace at .t Washington e6cet the library4 He ans+ere', 4! +ill thin& itover4 Aater he sai' so)ething ! ha' never hear' hi) say before 4(o ahea' +ith the aart)ent for)e, an' ! +ant the best4

aasi re)aine' in the hosital fro) "ril 23 E .ay 22 #he 'octors 'ischarge' hi) earlierbecause of the ublicity that aasi +as getting fro) his )illion='ollar gift to -5 #he 'octors thoughthe +oul' be able to hi'e fro) the reorters if he left the hosital, but they 'i' not +ant hi) to go toncinitas for they still +ante' to see hi) every 'ay for another +ee& -o they a'vise' hi) to co)e to.t Washington Ho+ hay +e +ere that he ha' his ne+ aart)ent rea'y for hi) to receive the'octors an' his business associates Ho+ very e)barrasse' +e +oul' have been to have the) co)e tosee aasi living in a library +ithout even a be', but only a roll=a+ay be' to slee on, being theresi'ent an' having given his )illion 'ollar gift to -5 !t +as +orth buil'ing the aart)ent, even forthe short ti)e he staye' in it, +hich +as only a +ee& aasi returne' to ncinitas for the su))er

Ne' Car!n -ete)ber, 190K, ust before returning to Borrego for the +inter, aasi announce' that he +ante' a

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ne+ car "lthough his crea) $l's)obile, +hich +as several years ol', +as still in goo' con'ition, it +as in -5s na)e -5 is still using it to this 'ay in 190; He as&e' )e to go to -an Diego to ic& oneout for hi) He +ante' all the ne+ e?ui)ent such as o+er steering an' o+er bra&es He +as hay

+ith )y choice -a' to say, he only ro'e in it a fe+ ti)es

I 6et /elp to Care -or Ra8asi " +ee& before his leaving for the +inter in Borrego, one )orning early ! hear' a heavy thu' on thefloor ! ran u to fin' aasi ha' fainte' right in front of his close' 'ressing roo) 'oor ! ha' to ushgently because his hea' +as against the 'oor ! +as alone in the house ven the Ae+is7 +ere gone Bythe ti)e ! got hel fro) the -5 retreat, he ha' gotten u an' +as bac& in be' again #his gave )esuch a fright that ! as&e' for the first ti)e in nineteen years for hel so)eone to stay in the north en'of the her)itage to be on call in case such a thing haene' again Daya sent -ra''ha an' for the lastfive )onths of aasi7s life, ! +as than&ful to have hel fro) the alternating souls .rinalini, -ra''ha,Pat Hogan, an' the last fe+ +ee&s, .atai !t +as a relief to have so)eone to hel )e, for those last)onths +ere very strenuous ones, for to+ar' the last, he ha' to be fe', shave', an' have so)eone go

+ith hi) on his +al&s for fear he +oul' stu)ble an' hurt hi)self "fter his secon' oeration, ! ha' to

shave hi) for the rest of his life aasi 'i' not suffer at all, nor 'i' he have ains u to an' even afterhis last an' thir' oeration, ! ?uote a letter fro) .aster to aasi<

JA* 31, 1930 E Half of )y siritual reali>ation is yours ! have not given so )uch to nonebut you $n the last 'ay on this earth, you +ill feel a su''en 'oubling illu)ination of all yourinner ercetions, an une6ecte' e6ansion, untol' increase of light an' bliss #hen you +ill&no+ +hat ! have given you What ! give you no+ is subtly a''e' to the results of your o+neffort ! have ta&en al)ost all of your &ar)a on )yself an' ! +ill +or& the sufferings out inthis bo'y that you )ay be free fro) the subtle tras of 'esires an' attach)ents an' have aclear sailing, li&e a shooting star in the 'istant heaven $f all )y effort, you have been blest

+ith ever=increasing oy an' siritual 'evelo)ent +ithout interrution #his is )y

sontaneous gift of )y 'eeest love an' 'evotion, an' relieving )e of a great )anyorgani>ational 'u'es #hese are all very sacre' things ! a) telling you

Ra8asi1s Tird Operation& /is Illness& /is +assing

aasi +as able to ta&e care of )ost of his ersonal chores e6cet shaving, but by the ti)e +e got toBorrego the latter art of -ete)ber, he +as not able to fee' hi)self for his right ar) +as +ea&er He

+as al+ays so very clean about his erson that silling so)ething on hi)self 'istresse' hi) so #oavoi' his being nervous about it, ! or the one +ho +as heling )e, fe' hi) Bro -arolanan'a staye' inthe cottage an' +oul' co)e at night to ta&e the night shift, for ! +as afrai' to let aasi get u to go tothe bathroo) alone 'uring the night !t see)e' li&e +e ha' been at Borrego ust a short ti)e +hen the

sy)to)s returne' ! calle' Dr %ovae at ncinitas He right a+ay +ante' to bring the a)bulance +ith hi), but ! tol' hi) ! 'i' not +ant the a)bulance to co)e +here aasi coul' see it, before hecoul' tal& to aasi beforehan' an' give hi) at least a short +arning of the things to co)e When the'octor ca)e, he 'i' bring the a)bulance, but it +as &et at a 'istance +hile Dr %ovae, +ho) DrAe+is ha' 'riven 'o+n, tal&e' to aasi !t too& so)e ti)e to convince aasi to go to the hosital, butfinally he agree' When +e got to the hosital, Dr aney thought aasi loo&e' better than he ha'anticiate' He sai' that the ri'e 'o+n to Aos "ngeles ha' arre' the tu)or 'o+n enough to relievethe ressure

aasi entere' the Hosital on $ctober 0, 190K, an' it 'i' not beco)e necessary to oerate until$ctober 12, +hen the ressure returne' He again sent another )onth this ti)e in the hosital We'rove hi) 'irectly to Borrego, the girls, .rinalini an' Pat, 'riving u to $ceansi'e, then .rs Ae+is

)et us there to sho+ the girls the +ay -he 'rove the rest of the +ay to Borrego an' aasi +as thefirst one to see .rs Ae+is stan'ing on the curb +aiting for us to ic& her u He sai', 4Well, loo&

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+ho7s here4 aasi never returne' to his belove' ncinitas her)itage again He left it the latter art of-ete)ber 190K We ha' hoe' that by the ti)e aasi left the hosital, he +oul' be able to go 'irectlyto his ne+ far)house, for he ha' not seen it yet But +e ha' to +ait until the 'ay before #han&sgivingto )ove in He +as so an6ious to see it that even a fe+ hours7 'elay 'islease' hi) When +e finallyarrive', +e too& hi) in his +heelchair to see every inch of the house He +as e6tre)ely lease', for

this too +as another longstan'ing 'esire of his to buil' a ho)e on his belove' far) in Borrego #his thir' oeration on the oor soul left hi) noticeably +ea&er #o the 'octors7 a)a>e)ent, he

still 'i' not suffer nor have any ain, for usually this is a very 'ifficult 'isease to han'le an' en'ure$nly through .aster7s intervention an' blessings on his belove' Aittle $ne coul' this be ossible !re)e)ber .aster saying, 4! a) suffering that you all )ay not suffer4 #his rove' it to )e beyon' thesha'o+ of a 'oubt What really surrise' )e, ! &ne+ aasi ha' al+ays been very health=)in'e' an' tosee hi) so co)lete'ly resigne' to his fate +as to )e nothing short of a )iracle Dr aney, theyounger brother, ca)e t+ice to see aasi at his far)house ! re)e)ber aasi7s face +hen he sa+ the'octor "fter he ha' left, ! ha' to assure aasi that he +as not going bac& to the hosital, for ! coul'see by his eyes he thought the 'octor ha' co)e to as& hi) again for another oeration, an' he 'i' not

+ant to go through that again, nor 'i' +e

We too& aasi out on his orch for sunbaths, +here he coul' +atch the .e6ican boys +or& onthe far), or see us +or&ing in the rest of the house He +as har'ly ever alone #here +as al+ays one ofus +ith hi) We too& hi) for ri'es 'o+n the roa' in his +heelchair an' hele' hi) +al& We +ererelieve' to have Dr %eville, a goo' local 'octor, co)e every 'ay to see an' ren'er aasi any ai' he

+oul' nee' When Dr aney ca)e for the last ti)e after January 1, 1900, he +as surrise' to see ho+soft aasis s&in +as an' ho+ fle6ible his araly>e' li)bs +ere, for usually i))obile li)bs beco)estiff very soon "fter bathing aasi every 'ay, ! ha' -arolanan'a co)e in the afternoon an' give aasia goo' rub 'o+n +ith oil an' e6ercise aasi7s +hole bo'y We raise' hi) an' hele' hi) stan' asoften as he coul' be strong enough to 'o so

When .atai ca)e the last fe+ +ee&s to hel )e, she brought +ith her several of .asters gifts to

her an' aasi7s roserity cross he love' so +ell aasi hel' these things in his ban' We coul' not getit a+ay fro) hi) even after he ha' fallen aslee He clung to anything that +as .aster7s an' neverloo&e' a+ay fro) .aster7s icture that +as on the 'resser lace' +here he coul' see it We &et it litall night He also loo&e' at the -t 5rancis statue the Benaus ha' given hi) +hile he +as in thehosital

$ne afternoon -arolanan'a +as heling )e +ith aasi by turning hi) on his si'e so his bac&coul' be +ashe' !n the rocess of turning hi), aasi loo&e' u at )e, then at -arolanan'a, an' sos+eetly ut his goo' ar) aroun' -arolanan'a7s nec& an' ulle' his hea' to his chest an' hel' hi)there for a long ti)e, blessing hi) (rateful tears rolle' 'o+n -arolanan'a7s eyes "fter that blessing,

+e coul' noticeably see a 'efinite change in -arolanan'a7s better behavior "t 'ifferent ti)es, to each

one that +as heling hi), aasi gave a secial blessing, as if he +ante' to e6ress his areciation forthe service +e all ren'ere' hi)

$ne 'ay loo&ing at hi), ! sai', 4With all the +on'erful care you too& of your bo'y, the best ofhealthful foo' an' e6ercise, still it 'i' not revent all this fro) ! haening4 #hough he coul' notsea& in those last 'ays, he no''e' his aroval Within those sa)e 'ays, ! as&e' hi), 4Di' you see.asterO4 He no''e', 4*es4 ! then as&e', 4What 'oes he sayO4 !n ans+er, tears ca)e to his sa', 'eeblue eyes, lo+ering his eyes an' hea' +ith an e6ression that .aster ha' tol' hi) that he +as, soongoing to hi) an' leaving us

During the last )onth of aasi7s life, ugene Aynn ca)e to see hi) !n the7 course of one of hisconversations +ith )e, he tol' )e that aasi7s fa)ily +oul'N insist that his bo'y be returne' to :ansasCity to their rivate cryt in the event that he asse' #his 'eely hurt )e, for )y faith +as so strongthat ! 'i' not thin& in ter)s of his leaving, nor 'i' it occur to )e that aasi belonge' to any otherfa)ily than his -5 Divine fa)ily ! ans+ere', 4When the ti)e 'i' co)e, +e ha' hoe' 7 +e coul'

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lace hi) ne6t to .aster, for there is an e)ty lace ne6t to hi)4 ugene sai', 4! a) sorry, Durga, tohurt you this +ay !f it +as u to )e, he coul' re)ain here, but ! &no+ "unt 5rie'a +oul' not hear ofit4 #hat is the reason aasi7s bo'y is interre' in :ansas City instea' of at 5orest Aa+n +ith .aster

"t Dr aney7s last visit, he tol' )e that he 'i' not thin& aasi coul' last any longer than t+o orthree +ee&s an' that he 'i' not thin& the tu)or +oul' be the cause of 'eath He e6laine' to )e to

reare )y )in' for +hat to e6ect that this brain tu)or 'isease brings on a 'isease in +hich thelungs fill u #hey fill u so rai'ly that nothing can sto the rocess, not even taing the lungs +illhel #he )orning of 5ebruary 19, 1900, Dr %eville ca)e as usual He as&e' )e if aasi ha' beenbreathing so heavily for long ! sai' ! ha' not notice' He tol' )e he +oul' co)e bac& that night !t

+as aroun' 1@ ) +hen he ca)e bac& an' ronounce' the fatal +or's that aasis lungs +ere fillingu an' it +as a fatal 'isease #o encourage us, he a''e', 4He )ay last until the ne6t 'ay, but he coul'leave anyti)e4

! +as totally unreare' for such ne+s Auc&ily, Daya, .rinalini, an' -ailasuta ha' co)e for the +ee&en' %one of us left his be'si'e that night ! sat by his si'e an' hel' his goo' ban' in )ine to theen' ! coul' feel the life force leaving his ban' an' feet ! &et )y eyes glue' to his face an' eyes "s !

+as 'oing so, ! coul' see his eyes getting 'i))er an' a +hite light +as aroun' his hea' Dr %evillere)aine' all night +ith us .atai faithfully hel' the o6ygen )as& over his nose an' )outh Dr %evillesai' later to -ailasuta, 4!t +as the )ost eaceful 'eath ! have +itnesse' for that tye of 'isease4 #helight &et getting brighter aroun' his hea' "fter+ar's ! coul' not hel but thin& ho+ )uch +e'een' on that little breath that goes in an' out, only through (o'7s grace, +e hung on to each breaththat aasi too& When it ca)e in, +e unconsciously breathe' +ith hi) a sigh of relief

#hen ust once at K a) -un'ay, 5ebruary 2@, 1900, the breath 'i' not co)e bac& -o )any, yes,even hun're's of ersons7 lives +ere change' by the re)oval of that life=giving breath of a successfulbusiness)an an' such a great saintly soul !t 'oes not surrise )e that our Belove' .aster +oul' ta&ehis )ost love' Aittle $ne first to enoy the blissful free'o) of the ternal Belove' (o' together

What )ore can ! say about aasi than to ?uote several of .aster7s letters to hi) +hich +ill e6ress

.asters love for hi), an' aasi receive' an' recirocate' it He often sai' he regar'e' .aster as aChrist

When .aster an' aasi +ere both at the her)itage, they +oul' see each other at least once'uring the 'ay or evening an' so)eti)es )ore often %o )atter ho+ often they )et, they greete'each other +ith fon' e)brace #heir love +as so sontaneously given, it +as as if this +as their veryfirst )eeting in this life #hey sat on the orch in the sun, or on the 'avenort si'e by si'e, ban' inhan', tal&ing, !t +as .asters habit to rub aasi7s chest over the heart, i)arting his 'ivine blessings,an' the )ore aasi lease' .aster, the faster he rubbe' aasi, +ith close' eyes, absorbe' every bitof the blessings an' )elte' in Divine accetance #hey +oul' )e'iate hol'ing han's, .astertrans)itting to aasi )any +on'erful siritual visions an' countless blessings of oy an' bliss %o+

they are roa)ing han' in han' in the lan' of the siritually free an' resting on the Boso) of the all=Blissful .other an' )elting in each others7 Divine Aove

#he follo+ing letters .aster +rote to aasi Jana&anan'a ! coie' one for each year fro) 1932 to1902 #hese can better e6ress the 'ee love a Belove' .aster ha' for his rincile 'iscile an'Belove' Aittle $ne

%aster1s Letters to Ra8asi !anakananda

"P!A 21, 1932 E %ever Before !n #he History of the cause 'i' it nee' a (o'=given saviorbusiness)an li&e you en'o+e' +ith soul an' o+er Please &no+ this in your heart ! have no'esire for anything ersonally but ! +ant to see in ")erica the +or& of Babai, Aahiri

.ahasaya an' (uru eretuate' by the efforts of a )ost +orthy soul li&e you Blesse' youare that you have co)e as the greatest frien' to the cause ! +ill give )y life to free you fro)

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the bon'age of the flesh, so it is )utual that +e +ill save one another "t ti)es +hen thecrucifi6ion of )aterial resonsibilities an' 'ebts see) so ressing, ! thin& of co)letefree'o), but stan' sailing in the )i'st of bullets of trials an' resonsibilities an' 'eath, ifnecessary, +ith )y Divine .other in )y boso) While ! +as in :ansas City, ! shall neverforget all the )aterial hel you ren'ere' to carry on the +or& an' )y +orries +ere blo+n

a+ay by your ti)ely Divine instru)entality

DC.B 1;, 1933 E ! recogni>e your )any changing faces of the ast Ho+ often in thegloo) of incarnations, ! have )e'itate' +ith you -uch love an' 'ivine frien'shi, suchgol'en cor's that tie' our souls in the ast !t +as +orth co)ing ten thousan' )iles to )eetan i))aculate sincere soul li&e you, one +ho &no+s not but the love of (o' *ou are richerthan )any &ings of the earth !f your business &ees you fro) co)ing, ! +ill co)e to you, to'rin& fro) the eternal +ell an' 'ive together in the laughing +aters of i))easurable bliss

What +or's can ! say to tell you +hat oy you gave )e When )y shi first touche' theshores of Chelsea Harbor near Boston, ! +rote, 4-leeing )e)ories of frien's once )ore tobe 'i' greet )e sailing over the sea4 $f all the )isery, )isun'erstan'ings, crucifi6ion,

raises, an' garlan's of false laughter of so=calle' frien's, your face stan's illu)ine' as one ofthe )ost recious of )y soul in the Western he)ishere

"(-# 31, 193K E *our 'ear letter )a'e )e feel that you +ere +ithin an' +ithout )e "fla)e of blesse'ness fro) your heart visite' )ine ntol' oy so&e to )e of the unen'ingoys of your heart "s :rishna )et his 'ivine frien', "runa, so have +e )et on this earthlane to train 'ivine sol'iers to fight the o+ers of 'ar&ness -uch oy your letter gave )e that)y sirit is +an'ering over the +ay+ar' hills every+here .y (o' is calling )e an' you arethe re)in'er of His Aight in this country #o tell you the truth, you are the only one in thiscountry +ho truly conflagrates )y insiration an' a''s to the en'less (o' in the )o)ents of)y +or&7s tribulations *ou as&e' )e for )y blessings .any have )y blessings +hich you

also have boun'lessly, but in a''ition you have an eternity full of )y love, +hich ! give to very fe+

JA* 2, 1930 E !t +as Aahiri .ahasaya +ho +as +ith )e +hen ! last sa+ you .any ti)es !have seen his astral bo'y in your fra)e ven your bo'y is changing into his -houl'ers, hea',face, everything #here is a saying in the scritures, 4When a glo++or) gets hol' of a beetle,the beetle turns into the glo++or)4 #he sa)e is true +ith Divine ibrations

$C#$B 193 E .ost Belove' Blesse' $ne of "ges< !t is so 'elightful an' goo' to 'o forsiritual +or&, &no+ing that your sirit is stea'fastly +or&ing +ith )e (o' an' ! +or&e'alone before, (o' re)aining subtly resent +ith )e %o+ he is +or&ing through your visible

bo'y +ith )e Ho+ very encouraging %ot once but )any ti)es you +ere in !n'ia !esecially sa+ this 'uring our )e'itation in Chicago *ou ca)e to the West +here there +erebetter )aterial oortunities for you to hel !n'ia "lso, so you coul' enoy the Westernculture an' cleanliness %o 'oubt you feel so 'ra+n to !n'ia ! a) so hay that your)e)ory as being one of the Hi)alayan saints of !n'ia is so slen'i'ly a+a&ene' in you !raye' for this for a long ti)e, esecially for !n'ia "ll that ! +ishe' for Dhiranan'a, ! onlygot such 'isaoint)ent, but (o' has fulfille' )any ti)es in you $ +hat Joy ! )ust sto alittle for )y eyes are fille' +ith tears of Bliss "n' each of )y tear'ros has an' +ill 'estroy)any of your ast obstructing &ar)a Blesse' you are to have Her love Her you shall loveforever an' ever in unen'ing .erri)ent #his is the re+ar' for all that you have renounce'for Her an' the cause " thousan'=fol' re+ar' co)es an' the greatest re+ar' lies in Her

surren'er to the 'evotees

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"(-# 2, 193 E #han& you little $ne for your i))ortal love ! sen' you )ine untoeternity Just i)agine right after this life, eternal e)anciation is +aiting for us #he goal that)illions +ant but 'ont get #han& the great Belove' (o' an' the (urus What leases )e)ost is the fulfill)ent of Divine .other7s le'ge in resonse to )y rayers *ou are ust as !

+ante' you to be *our reasonableness in cooerating +ith )y 'ivine 'esires (o' eternally

blesses you for that *ou have all )y blessings an' love fro) the very core of )y heart "syou cooerate +ith )y +ishes +ith erfection of heart an' love, so shall all nature cooerate +ith your +ishes We shall go on an' on the eternal ath +ith Divine .other, (urus, you an'! )oving s+iftly to eternal consu))ation, to the en'less en' an' on to the ceaseless la ofhainess .e'itate an' be in -irit every )o)ent, that -atan 'oesn7t get one tiny gras toannoy you +ith restlessness .e'itate +ith 'eeest faith that you have foun' Hi) an' He +illever be +ith you an' you +ill be +ith Hi) .e'itate thin&ing that all your 'esires are finishe'for you have foun' the $ne +ho is the fulfill)ent of all 'esires $nly strongly &ee the 'esireto hel all others through your e6a)le an' by ever e6an'ing this +or& over the earth #hatis your 'uty as or'aine' by the (reat $nes Ho+ hay an' blesse' you are "n're+ .ellon

+ho 'ie', his riches +oul'n7t secure hi) the &ing'o) of (o', nor his goo' +or&s +ithout

(o' *our goo' +or& +ith (o'7s consciousness +ill secure the eternal &ing'o) verlastinglove ver yours, E - *oganan'a

DC.B 12, 193; E Dear Aittle Divine Prince< 5or this is +hat ! feel to call you forbeing the instru)ent of (o' to give Christ)as resents to all through )e ! a) so sorry )ylittle $ne is tosse' on the sea of trials %o )atter ho+ )any trials an' ho+ har' the +in'sstri&e you, &no+ you are 'rifting to+ar' the shore of !nfinite hainess #he strong +in's oftrial are His Hi''en Caresses to ta&e you ho)e an' )a&e your footstes fir)er as you arehea'ing ho)e+ar' #rials in'icate (o' is testing your strong sirituality an' 'ee attain)entin Hi) Do not ta&e the trials seriously even if they loo& serious Just +ait +ith an in+ar'

s)ile an' surely the resent test an' their atten'ing trials +ill blo+ over

."* 23, 1939 E %o+ since (o' co)es first in your life an' our +or&, so shall (o' voluntarily be first in your life increasingly #o thin& of you is oy #his oy lin&s our souls in(o'

J"%"* 23, 19K@ E ! never felt such love for you as +hen you +ere here last ti)e #he)ore erfect you are the )ore it 'ra+s out )y infinite love for you ! a) gla' all lans of-atan are co)ing to naught !n your areciation of +hat (o' has given you through the(reat $nes, in that lies your re'e)tion %o+ you &no+ that suffering is a art of 'oinggoo' Jesus Christ ai' +ith his life for 'oing goo' We )ust be reare' to suffer for 'oing

goo' to sho+ an' rove to (o' +e are ever rea'y to bu) our cross in the furnace of thetests of life

5B"* 1;, 19K1 E " 'ay 'oes not ass that ! have not thought of the sueroy !ve ha'in your Co)any +hen you co)e ! let go everything an' launch in -irit *ou have felt yoursirit +ith one an' all here !n the ast you )ust have been a flying yogi so)eti)e "stralflying is )uch safer !f it is His Will, you so)eti)e have to learn that again through His(race Ho+ever, ! have surren'ere' you in His "r)s, He +ho gave you to )e ! a) hayHo+ever, it thrills )e to see you carrie' on the +in's in the clou's an' so)e'ay +hen yoursoul is +inge' over the vast sirit )ore an' )ore, ! shall be haier ! a) so hay youenoye' the sunshine "s (uru blesse' )e +ith goo' +eather +henever ! +ante' it, so )ay

you )ostly be blesse' +ith goo' +eather #hat is )y stan'ing +ish for you in the 5ather !a) +rae' u 'ay an' night in Divine .other7s ar)s an' offer you to Her in )y 'aily

135



contact +ith Her

"P!A 0, 19K1 E *our telegra) +as co)forting an' letter very sy)athetic an' touching Wehave +or&e' together, enoye' an' laughe' together, +al&e' han' in han' in (o's Pathtogether an' for the first ti)e +e suffere' together

JA* 23, 19K2 E #he insiration of your resence an' your little han's utting into )yoc&et the )uch=nee'e' hel, +as the ans+er of your love for +hat ! a) going through !sa+ it all but 'i' not +ant to 'isturb you *our soul ans+ere' an' really ! coul' s)ile inHa'es if you +ere +ith )e *our siritual a'vance)ent an' e6erience of )eeting hugebusiness 'isasters has given you the o+er of unsha&en inner attitu'e an' a)a>ingsy)athetic cal)ness +hich +as solacing to )e ! +ant you to &no+ if it +ere not for you, !

+oul' have lost the last vestige in )e to continue to live in this +orl' of )isery an'i)erfection

J"%"* 1@, 19K3 E .y thoughts lullaby you in the cra'le of Cos)ic oy an' offer soothing

love to )itigate the )utual 'isaoint)ent *our +or', 4soothing,4 +as very touching an'reveals ho+ you love )e as i))easurably as ! love you ! +ill ever re)e)ber that e6ression #hat is the best salve for )e because of your force' absence

J"%"* 22, 19KK E .ost Blesse' Belove' 1 an' B 1< *our last note )a'e )e very hay *ou are the only one on earth to +ho) ! ta&e )y troubles for the organi>ation *ou are theonly one +ho consoles )y an6iety for the future, everyone else ! have to console #here is no

+or' +hich ! can use to e6ress )y feeling for all your goo'ness to )e an' us #ears co)e to)y eyes as a great 'ivine love flo+s over )e an' ra'iates an' envelos you +herever you are(o' certainly too& your for) an' heart to suit )y love for an i'eal un'erstan'ing frien'shian' siritual i'ealis) %othing else can ! say +hich can e6ress )y thoughts a'e?uately

J"%"* 20, 19K0 E ! a) 'eely raying for your goo' father #here is an e6a)le ho+ thebo'y is a 'elusion an' only the soul is real an' everyone shoul' fin' reali>ation before thebo'y beco)es an encu)brance an' a test ! a) so hay your sirit soars beyon' your bo'yan' (o' has given you reali>ation %ot only are you re'ee)e' *our father an' )other +illfin' re'e)tion through your goo' &ar)a, inheriting your siritual, i)erishable riches

."CH 21, 19K E !t +as your true self, s+eet voice, an' your loving sirit, 'evotion to (o' +hich +as so )anifest in your tal& yester'ay *ou have +on the highest through His (racean' the hel of the (reat (urus !t has been a terrible test for )e too, for ! have al+ays felt !

+oul' not li&e to live +ithout you ! have al+ays +ante' to go before you ! +ell &no+ the

+ays of -atan *ou can +ell un'erstan' +hy ! tal&e' to you as ! 'i' about the grove in #e6as,etc, but -atan beco)es the tool of (o' for He turns -atans evil into goo', an' yet -atanca)e near succee'ing in #e6as, but (o' an' the (reat (urus lanne' 'ifferently !t is so nicethat you no+ see that all hu)an ai' +oul' have been futile if (o' ha' let -atan arrange to&ee you in #e6as a little longer !n every test, (o' )ust be aroache' first #hen all co)esright an' your test +oul' have been less

J"%"* 1, 19K E %e+ *ear7s (reeting fro) .y Heart to -t Aynn6 ara!hansa ogananda

When o!es suh another, though : ha)e searhed all o< er earth<s ether

So s'eet, +ind, and understanding, e)er tring to hel( is de)otees shining E)en 'hen ea) earthl duties= load

136



@ee(s hi! running on li&e<s road iher ou are 'ith e)er hea(ing S(irit<s gold than !an !undane rihes gone dere(it (oor and old : ha)e (ut in ou an undeaing, "right, e)er-"lessed God<s golden lotus te!(le o& light

All<s 'ell 'hat ends 'ell and in is Sea ou are di)ing dee(er 'ith &irst "orn ardour<s glee ere 'e !et and together 'e ha)e laid is te!(le in true soul<s e)er !ade

aught an : sa to e7(ress to ou the Age-long gathered tea dro(s o& li)es de' Wal+ sared, "right-&aed soul sattering God &ro! our heart<s halie to all our ha((iness ! ha((iness, our 2o ! 2o e)er our s!ile ! s!ile in God &ore)er We !et "e&ore, 'e !eet again

on earth<s tu!ultuous !ain 6 e)er inreasing e&&ort, +ee( &i7ed our gae "eond strong delusions< hae Then 'hat : ha)e ! heart that in is heart li)e in our hands : "esto'

A "ouFuet o& little souls &ragrant 'ith God<s glo'

"(-# 11, 19K; E Dear .ost Belove' 1< Welco)e ho)e -o sorry ! 'i' not have achance to +rite to you, 'ue to the uncertainty of your 'ate of arrival *et ! +as very gla' tohear your s+eet voice over the hone ncinitas is your sanctu) on your green grass altar

*ou, (o', (urus, an' sunshine have &et you ever hay, a true (o' nature boy Do not

)i6 +ith business an' internal olitics of the organi>ation !t +ill bring you nothing e)ain)ore +ith (o' $nly your goo'+ill, constructive suggestions, an' cooeration +ill bringthings to success as (o' +ishes it ! felt li&e running out to greet you, but )y -irit is ever

+ith you "ll )y love, ver sincerely yours E P *oganan'a

J"%"* 1, 19K9 E *ou have live' u to )y e6ectations an' given )e such oy for livingso i'eally eoice boun'lessly, continuously for you have gaine' the (race of the Divine.other an' the (urus *ou are richer beyon' the +ealth of &ings #he riches of Her (race isi)erishable "ll else, inclu'ing the bo'y, 'oes not belong to us an' +ill be ta&en a+ay fro)us *our oy ! have en'lessly felt Continue in that oy #he !nfinite &ing'o) is yours With

)y 'eeest rayers that you be victorious over all (o'7s tests forever !n being in oycontinuously lies your greatest victory .ay ternal oy an' victory be yours With all )y love ery sincerely yours "ll )y love an' .other7s love be yours

E Para)hansa *oganan'a

JA* 3@, 190@ E ! hear' +hat you 'i' for Phoeni6 #here is only one -t Aynn, a true saintalive for (o' an' the (urus, an' -elf=eali>ation #his is )y blessing throughout eternity He

+ill never +ant but he shall have financial an' highest free'o) an' bounty fro) (o', an')y +or's sai' fro) the heart are al+ays true (o' is behin' the) !t +ill be everre)e)bere' every 'ay *ou have hele' )e to finish )y tas& on earth through the (urus

With all )y love an' unen'ing blessings for all you have 'one, unceasing love, unceasing

than&s, unceasing blessings P *oganan'a

137



$C#$B 9, 1901 E .ost blesse' Belove' 1< ! icture' )yself an', (o' forbi', yourself,a+ay fro) this earth, an' +atching +hat -5 Boar' +oul' be 'oing an' ho+ it +oul' beable to carry on the +or& of -5 *ou have been a valiant victorious +arrior in 'irectbusiness 'ifficulties, surely you can successfully bring -5 through to the en' What you have'one at this ti)e for (o' an' the (urus is 'irectly receive' by the .ost High an' the (reat

$nes an' ersonally to )y great hainess that +ill )any ti)es be save' in the ban& ofternity, +herever you go here an' in the great beyon' "n' )ay you live long an' +ell tocarry on the blesse' +or& of the .asters in -5 all over the globe

#his is the last letter .aster +rote to aasi Jana&anan'a before .asters .ahasa)a'hi

."CH , 1902 E .ost Belove' Blesse' 1< #han& you for your +on'erful graefruit an'oranges (reat affairs visit of a)bassa'or fro) !n'ia !t +as a triu)h for -5, for oliticsan' religion 'on7t )i6 With 'eeest love, ery sincerely yours,

E *oganan'a

P - #he a)bassa'ors arty an' consul general "hega visiting ncinitas -atur'ay Please besure to )eet the) an' be intro'uce' by Dr Ae+is Du, be there too Do everything to leasethe) With love,

E P *

138



- "#D"* , "(-# K, 19K0 E "*!AA, !CHA"%D P "!-H, A$!-!"%" E Jesse W Aynn, age' 92 years,robably the ol'est citi>en of ichlan' arish, )e)ber of one of the ol' ioneer fa)ilies to ta&e uresi'ence in the arish before the Civil War, 'ie' at his ho)e in "rchibal' last We'nes'ay at 1@<0@a) .r Aynn ha' been ill for several years, an' confine' to his be' for several )onths rior to his'eath He is survive' by t+o sons, H Aynn of "rchibal' an' J J Aynn of:ansas City, .oN t+o

'aughters, .rs C ! Bilington of.angha), .rs # W Aogan of "rchibal'N an' one brother, J BAynn of.ontebello, California

#he funeral services +ill be hel' at the "rchibal' Presbyterian Church -atur'ay )orning at 1@o7cloc& ev " Cates, of the ayville an' "rchibal' Presbyterian churches, officiating inter)ent

+ill be in the fa)ily ce)etery .r Aynn +as born in %o6ubee County, .ississii, "ril 3, 1;03, an'ca)e to +hat is no+ ichlan' arish +ith his arents in 1;@, an' has since resi'e' near +here heoriginally settle' He engage' in far)ing all of his life an' +as very active in his business u to the ti)ehis health faile' hi) While never see&ing olitical refer)ent of any &in', he +as a citi>en +ho too& a&een an' unselfish interest in the affairs of his co))unity He +as the i'eal ho)e )an an' neighboran' citi>en, an' 'i' )uch to enrich this art of %orth Aouisiana 'uring his long an' useful life

His +ife, +ho +as .iss -alethia "rchibal' before her )arriage to hi) in the early 1;;@7s,rece'e' hi) to the grave in -ete)ber 19K3 -he too brave' a long an' ainful illness for )onthsbefore her 'eath

#he love an' 'evotion that characteri>e' their )arrie' life all through the years, foun' 'eeconsecration in their last 'ays +hen illness confine' the) to their ho)e "l+ays rather )o'est an' not

very 'e)onstrative of the 'ee feeling an' senti)ents that )a'e u his heart of gol', those +ho &ne+best, as this e'itor +ho +as one of his nehe+s, &ne+ his ersonality to be one of rare s+eetness an'char), an' his rivate life an' his association +ith neighbors an' frien's a )o'el of )anly virtue an'true an' uright citi>enshi !n hi) +as the consistent beauty of high i'eas an' i'eals +hich )a&e lifea s+eeter an' haier thing Aove of urity, a sirit of ten'erness an' &in'ness, Christian integrity an'loyalty, loving fi'elity to his fa)ily an' frien's, 'elicacy of thought an' feeling, high i'eals of thought

an' con'uct, a high concetion of one7s +or& as the e6ression of his character, an' therefore a holything, subli)e courage to battle +ith the ills of life, even to the en', an' a soul aglo+ +ith -outhern

+ar)th

He +ill lie burie' in the fa)ily ce)etery on the lace he last clai)e' for )any years as his ho)e "roun' hi) slee those he love' )ost an' 'earest in life, a fit lace for hi) to rest till the eternala+a&ening

#o his 'evote' chil'ren +ho have been rivilege' to have hi) +ith the) so long, +e ten'erlyco))en' the) to Hi) +ho en'o+e' this love' one +ith such a rare heart an' soul as to enrich theirlives an' leave to the) the rich legacy of the clean life of goo' an' gracious arent

140



(eflections of My Guru

Paramhansa Yogananda

"y Sri Durga Mata )uly* $%&%

141



Contents< Boo& !!!

.aster7s Bo'y -tructure 1KK

6ercises an' Wal& 1K06eriences With Dress an' Aong Hair 1K0His Clothes 1K5oo' 1K.aster7s -&in 10@

oice 10@-leelessness 10@

Writing 101ea'ing Habits 101

War, 19K1 101 ")erica 101

egar'ing .oney 102Driving a Car 102

Wor&ing 102.ovies 102Playful 103Hu)an #raits 103a'io 103Chanting 103

#ravel 10K.aster7s Personal Part in $ur Christ)as "ctivities 100Babai7s .essage 10

#ouche' .aster7s 5eet 10;.aster7s Birth'ays Celebrations 10;Preu'ice 10;)otions 109$) -oun' fro) His 5eet 109

#rees 109Aoyalty 109Healing 109

#a&ing -uffering on Hi)self 1@egar'ing .aster7s Aove 11egar'ing Heling $thers 11

.aster7s -uffering for $thers 1K

.aster7s yes 10n' uotation 1

-H# .-!C 1

142



Master &irst !entioned his "irthda to a2asi, Januar th, 1941* Master used t"e na!e S'a!i or S* ogananda u( to193* Then he used onl ogananda &or a'hile* And the ti!e he signed * ogananda 'as o)e!"er $, 1939* .irst'rote ara!hansa ogananda to a2asi, Marh 1940*

– 6 Durga

143



(eflections of My Guru

Paramhansa Yogananda

"y Sri Durga Mata

! +ill not +rite here about all the +or& )aster 'i', nor the roects he create', the files that are in

this file cabinet +ill tell you about his creations, struggles to ac?uire the), an' the results Hence, ! +illconfine this +riting about .aster ersonally as ! have seen, hear', an' felt in )y very li)ite' caacity

#he first ti)e ! sa+ Para)hansa *oganan'a +as in Detroit, .ichigan, )y ho)eto+n, inDece)ber 192 .y !)ression of hi) +as no 'oubt the sa)e as thousan's of others +ho ha' seenhi) years before )e, an' 'uring his short san of life on this earth lane, an' ever since his.ahasa)a'hi through his hotograhs, +ritings, an' teachings "t this first )eeting +hich ! atten'e'on that )e)orable Dece)ber 192, )y ga>e +as rivete' to the beautiful face before )e, because )ysoul +as sensing the (o'=li&e soul +ithin the out+ar' for) ! ha' never seen anyone li&e hi) beforean' ! soon ca)e to learn that there +oul' not be another li&e hi) for )e Without reali>ing or even&no+ing +hat a guru +as li&e nor to +hat urose a guru serve', )y starlet soul sense' His (o'ly

light an' hitche' itself once again to that Polestar of )y eternal (uruiHo+ can one +rite about ones guru, or ut into +or's +hat a Christ=li&e soul is li&e, or ho+ can !

e6ress +hat )y soul gaine' through his 'ivine contact, +or's are so ina'e?uate, but nevertheless, ! +ill )a&e a feeble atte)t to e6ress the out+ar' for) as ! have seen, hear', an' felt it, 'uring t+enty=three years of 'ose hysical contact +ith hi), an' still another seven years of $)niresent contact

+ith )y life7s Polestar +ho is ever intuitively gui'ing )e

%aster1s Bod$ Structure

5irst, let )e 'escribe the outer for) of .aster He +as not )ore than five feet seven inches tall,though he ha' very s)all u'gy han's an' feet, an' s)all=bone' He +as heavy, +ith so)e fat, but

through tensing e6ercises, he 'eveloe' )uscles an' shoul'ers, ar)s an' +ell=for)e' legs #he)uscles +ere not the bulgy tye, but evenly 'istribute' an' har' as steel He ha' a large ab'o)en !nlater years +hen he +as e6ercising, trying to lose so)e of the ab'o)ens largeness, he hu)anly tol' )e,4#o thin& +hen ! +as younger ! 'i' not have a sto)ach at all, but after ! beca)e a -+a)iN it +as asecial )ar& in those 'ays for a -+a)i to have a large ab'o)en, so ! ractice' secial e6ercises that

+oul' 'evelo the ab'o)inal )uscles, an' no+ that ! 'ont +ant it, it is re)aining stea'fast4 5or thisreason .aster 'i' not +ant the general ublic to see ictures of hi) +ithout a robe or suit, he +ashu)an enough not to +ant to e6hibit his ac?uire' sto)ach #hough the ab'o)en +as large, it +as notfat, but )ostly )uscles -everal ti)es .aster erfor)e' a feat in his ublic lectures 'e)onstrating thestrength of his sto)ach )uscles He stoo' against the stage +all an' invite' a 'o>en )en fro) theau'ience to co)e uN he ha' the) stan'ing single file one in bac& of the other an' all ushe' in one

'irection ushing against .asters sto)ach With his sto)ach )uscles, he gave an out+ar' thrust, an'all the )en +ere su''enly ushe' a+ay an' fell bac&+ar's He also sai' that he &ne+ ho+ to +al& onfire, an' to go +ithout eating in'efinitely, but that (o' 'i' not +ant hi) to erfor) such feats, for his

144



)ission +as to teach an' bring souls bac& to (o' through :riya *oga an' love

5or having the bo'y of a )an, he ha' less than average hair covering his bo'y 5or a erson of his +eight an' strength, his carriage +as graceful an' he +al&e' +ith a sringy steN one coul' har'ly hearhi) co)ing He coul' run li&e a 'eer, as if on his titoes He coul' outrun even the fastest erson Heuse' to run )any races +ith us all on the tennis court or on the beach an' he +oul' soon leave us far

behin' He carrie' a cane not because he nee'e' it, but because to hi) it reresente' a staff, +hich the)asters in the Hi)alayas carry as a sy)bol of the sine an' :riya *oga %o )atter ho+ busy or in ahurry he )ight be, he never )isse' his 'aily sho+er He ever left his be'roo) +ithout a clean )outhor unshaven ! never sa+ hi) +ith a five o7cloc& sha'o+, for he shave' so 'ose that )any thought he'i' not nee' to shave at all #o hi) cleanliness +as ne6t to (o'liness

.ercises and "alk

.aster7s +on'erful hysi?ue +as ac?uire' through his o+n tensing e6ercises, +hich he create' an''eveloe' in !n'ia before co)ing to this country in 192@ He sai' at hat ti)e he trie' +hat he calle' all&in's of )uscle bu)ing e6ercises to 'evelo an' i)rove his bo'y strength He often thought,

4#here )ust be so)e better +ay of e6ercising4 He continue', 4$ne 'ay ! sa+ a cat a+a&ening fro)its na, an' i))e'iately uon rising ! observe' that the cat stretche' its bo'y as far as it coul' an' fora long ti)e ! +on'ere' +hy the cat stretche' an' +hat +as the stretching 'oing to its bo'y ! began tostretch )yself Having &een observation o+er, ! 'iscovere' that ! felt so )uch )ore life in )y bo'y

#he cat ha' tense' its bo'yN an' this e6erience gave )e the i'ea of )y tensing e6ercises "s !ractice' stretching every )orning an' evening an' 'uring the 'ay, ! felt such +on'erful resultsN fro)one i)rove)ent after another, it beca)e +hat ! gave in the first *ogo'a lessons4 !n later years.aster a''e' )ore e6ercises, the sa)e that are no+ ractice' in the -5 lessons that have a+a&ene'the +orl' to a ne+ )etho' of e6ercises Aater, )any stu'ents +ho too& .aster7s lessons coie' the)an' gave the) out as their o+n "ll .aster +oul' say to that +as, 4"t least they are heling eole4.aster never )isse' 'oing his e6ercises, no )atter +here he +as or ho+ late at night or ho+ early in

the )orning ! re)e)ber )any ti)es he an' all of us stoo' in front of a hotel, or on a si'e street,high+ay, or beach to 'o our e6ercises, +hether there +ere assersby +ho loo&e' at us +on'eringly ornot #hen after e6ercising +e +ent for a +al& .aster +as very a'a)ant that +e continue to 'o oure6ercises $ne ti)e +hen he +as suffering +ith so)eone7s &ar)a, he sat on the e'ge of his be' an'began 'oing his e6ercises ! as&e', 4! &no+ -ir you no longer nee' to 'o the e6ercises, +hy 'o youO4He ans+ere', 4#o be a goo' e6a)le to you all4

.periences 'it 4ress and Long /air

.aster ha' often tol' us that +hen he first ca)e to this country he +ore his tra'itional -+a)i $r'erochre robe, an' long hair flo+ing belo+ his turban He sai' he +as going to e'ucate the ")ericans by

+earing his robe an' long hair on the street an' every+here He tol' us )any stories of his e6eriences

in the rocess of trying to e'ucate eole $ne 'ay late in $ctober, he +as invite' to sea& at a girlscollege near Boston He too& the streetcar, an' at a sto, a bunch of girls got on He +as stan'ing, forthere +ere no seats left " fe+ of the girls began to horselay, as it +ere, an' starte' )a&ing funnyre)ar&s about his 'ress an' hair, etc, an' even ulle' his hair "fter e6ercising a lot of atience, hethought he +oul' teach the) a lesson an' in a lou' voice sai', 4-o these are the ")erican girls ! hear'so )uch about in !n'ia4 #heir laughter 'roe' +ith e)barrass)ent an' they began to aologi>e fortheir )isbehavior an' e6laine' that since it +as so near Hallo+een they thought his robe +as acostu)e an' he +as trying to lay a gag on the), an' they +ere going right along +ith it #hereafter,they as&e' his forgiveness an' coul' not 'o enough for hi) #hey gave hi) a seat, began as&ing?uestions about !n'ia, +hat he taught, an' even escorte' hi) to the hall +here he +as to )a&e hisseech

"nother ti)e +hen he +ent to a fair, he ate so)e of the foo' sa)les "fter+ar's, +hen he +ante' to +ash his han's, he as&e' +here the restroo)s +ere He follo+e' the 'irections that +ere

145



ointe' to hi), an' +ithout loo&ing at the sign on the 'oor he +ent in He sa+ la'ies to the right an'la'ies to the left, he +as the one to get out of there in a hurryF When he starte' 'o+n the stes to the)ens restroo), one of the )en +as co)ing u an' sai' to .aster, 4ustairs, la'y, ustairs4 .astercontinue' 'o+n an' +hen the )en sa+ hi), they ran in all 'irections telling hi) to go ustairs #heyre)aine' ?uiet only after they hear' .asters lou', )asculine voice say, 4! &no+ +here ! a) going4

$nce +hen he +as on the train, he notice' that the orter &et going bac& an' forth 5inally, theorter coul' not stan' it any longer an' as&e' .aster, 4!s you a )an or is you a +o)anO4

.aster7s hair +as long, thic&, +avy, an' blue=blac& .any thought he 4)arcelle'4 his hair $ncehe ha' a young )an +ho +as heling hi) +ith his ca)aign +or& an' one night before going on thestage to 'eliver his lecture, .aster +as stan'ing in front of the )irror co)bing his hair He arte' it inthe center an' ulle' the bac& hair )ore to the front on each shoul'er #he boy +as )entally thin&ingho+ vain .aster +as .aster often 'e)onstrate' in his lectures +hat he 'i' to give this boy a lessonHe sai' he stoo' for the longest ti)e in front of the )irror 'eliberately ta&ing )ore ains to affi6 eachhair in the right lacesN etting his hair here an' there, co)bing an' reco)bingN all the +hile +atchingthe boy7s e6ression change to 'eeer criticis) 5inally, .aster turne' to hi) an' sai', 4-o you thin& !

a) vain, because ! co)b )y hair before going to face an au'ience ! sa+ you in the )irror an'receive' your thoughts #hat is +hy ! 'eliberately acte' vain ! 'i' it all the )ore to give youso)ething to critici>e )e for Aet this be a lesson to you %ever critici>e eole for things you 'on7tun'erstan', or u'ge others by yourself *ou +oul' also critici>e )e if ! +ent on the latfor) loo&ingli&e ! ust got u fro) be'4 #he boy aologi>e' an' never critici>e' .aster again .aster sel'o)

+ashe' his hair, because he ha' an ol' theory that +ashing his hair too often +oul' )a&e it 'ro outHe &et his scal sotlessly clean by religiously an' 'aily brushing his hair an' scal #here never +as atrace of 'ry fla&es, an' ! 'ont re)e)ber his hea' or hair ever having an o'or, e6cet, +hen he ha' tobe +here there +as s)o&ing an' he +oul' air his hair +hen he got ho)e to get the o'or out ! +ritehere an e6cert of .aster7s letter to aasi regar'ing this s)o&e in his hair

JA* 1K, 193 E ! use' to co)e ho)e, )y hair saturate' +ith s)o&e an' )y eyes burningafter luncheon tal&s ! felt even suffocate' $ne 'ay ! )a'e u )y )in', Divine -irit +ass)o&e an' light, an' ! +as never bothere' since .in' is everything, +hichever +ay you trainit #hough )ost of the ti)e ! travele' in first class on trains in !n'ia, so)eti)es ! +ent in thethir' class co)art)ents ac&e' +ith 'irty, s)elling, even lerous eole ! concentrate' an'foun' Divine .other there too

.aster +ore his hair flo+ing loose +henever he +ore his robeN other ti)es he too& to brai'ing it

He +oul' brai' it tight an' then tuc& the brai' insi'e his +hite scarf or tuc& it un'er so)e hair at thenae of his nec& an' hol' it 'o+n +ith a bobby in un'er his hat 5ro) the front one coul' barely seeit 5ro) behin' it loo&e' li&e it +as cut at ti)es, so +ell +as it conceale' He 'i' not cut his hair

e6cet to tri) it aroun' his ears an' at the nae of the nec& for the fe+ loose hairs "lthough his hair7 thinne' an' ha' a fe+ gray hairs in the latter art of his earthly life, it re)aine' blac& an' beautiful

$nce .aster hear' fro) one of his brother 'isciles that -ri *u&tes+ari ha' seen a icture ofhi) +ith his hair tuc&e' in bac&, an' -ri *u&tes+ari sai', 4! see *oganan'a has beco)e ")ericani>e'no+, he has cut his hair4 !))e'iately uon receiving this ne+s, .aster ha' his icture ta&en an' sentit right out to his guru an' +rote, 4!f ! ha' cut )y hair it +oul' not have gro+n in so fast, it is still longaccor'ing to your +ishes4 -ri *u&tes+ari +as lease' that his siritual son ha' &et his re?uest, an'.aster +as lease' to be able to sho+ his guru that he ha' &et his +ish alive by &eeing his hair long

/is Clotes

.aster sai' that after a fe+ years of trying to e'ucate the ")erican eole in his +ay of 'ressing an' +earing his hair, he ha' to a')it that he +as only one lone soul against )illions, so he 'eci'e' tofollo+ the )illions7 )o'e of 'ress, an' began to +ear business suits When ! first ca)e, he also +ore a

146



ro)an collar +ith a +hite scarf fol'e' in the center an' hel' +ith a eacoc& in Aater, he use' our-5 in "fter a fe+ years, he aban'one' the har' collar an' only use' the +hite scarf hel' +ith thee)ble) in sually his suit +as a navy blue, or so)eti)es bro+n an' gray but never blac&, an'al+ays +ith a +hite shirt Aater years of his life, he +ore slac&s of light blue, gray or +hite +ith ac&etsHe never gave u +earing his +hite scarf an' or'inary shoes Aater years, he ut heavy cree soles on

his shoes His theory +as that the har' ce)ent +al&s or streets arre' the bo'y too )uch He al+ays +ore an overcoat su))er an' +inter 5or )any years, ! +on'ere' +hy he al+ays +ore a su))erovercoat even in the hottest +eather $ne 'ay ! as&e' hi), 4-ir, +hy 'o you al+ays +ear an overcoateven +hen it is so hotO4 He ans+ere', 4Because it )a&es )e feel that ! a) +earing a robe4 #hen !un'erstoo' that he +as not going to let the business suit ta&e his )in' a+ay fro) being +hat he +asal+ays in his )in'< one +hose or'er +as to +ear a robe ! have never hear' hi) as& for anything forhi)self, an' if he nee'e' a ne+ suit of clothes, others ha' to get it for hi) He +ore atche' orangenightgo+ns for years an' only in recent years 'i' he +ear aa)as of 'ifferent colors

.aster +ore his robe to lectures, classes, !ntervie+s, an' all celebrations or cere)onies an'so)eti)es 'uring !ntervie+s +hen he +as at ho)e #he first fe+ years his robes +ere of cotton an' hefoun' that ")ericans thought he +as overty=stric&en an' +oul' not follo+ hi) !n !n'ia, he sai', 4"

-+a)i is loo&e' 'o+n uon if he +ears anything but cotton, but in ")erica ! a) loo&e' 'o+n uon if! +ear cotton, so ! ha' to change to sil& in ")erica, an' +hen ! +as in !n'ia in 1930, ! +ore cottonagain4 When ! first )et hi) he +ore his robe +ith a long belt aroun' his +aist, an' his long scarffol'e' in half, inne' in front at his nec&line Aater he starte' +earing the scarf as you no+ see it in hislatest ictures, on the si'e .aster sai' orange is the color of the soul an' the renunciant7s color

0ood

.aster 'i' not eat brea&fastN )aybe lunch, but usually he ha' only one coo&e' )eal, at no articularti)e, 'een'ing on his activity -o)eti)es he +oul' +al& to the big &itchen refrigerator an' ta&e a biteof this or that, left=over curry or other foo's, or he +oul' sit at the &itchen table an' cut otatoes or

other vegetables for a curry he +ante' coo&e' He usually too& his bath before eating .aster li&e' hiscoo&e' foo's +ell sice' an' currie' an' )ost of the ti)e chili=hot "lthough he 'i' not )a&e it toohot for the rest that ate +ith hi), he ha' a si'e 'ish of choe' hot chili to ut in his o+n curry

.aster ate !n'ian=style +ith his fingers, e6cet if there +ere guests, or at a restaurant, he use' afor& He coul' even scoo u uice fro) his flat late +ith his fingers 5or hours after eating, he use'to ass his fingers un'er his nose to get the fragrance of the curry that still lingere' on his fingers evenafter several +ashings He use' to tell us that +as one +ay of telling if the curry +as goo'N if thefragrance re)aine' on the fingers for long .asters greatest leasure +as coo&ing He +oul'intuitively get the taste in his )outh, an' no )atter +hat ti)e of 'ay or night or )i''le of the night he

+oul' go into his &itchen an' +oul' ut the 'ifferent ingre'ients together, until he got the sa)e tastefro) the finishe' ro'uct, as he ha' reviously receive' He ha' so )any 'ifferent +ays of cutting

otatoes $ne +ay for a certain curry, another +ay for a cauliflo+er curry, or length+ise for sou #he4ne+4 otatoes ha' to be cut entirely 'ifferently He +oul' cut the) hi)self or sho+ )e ho+ to cutthe) an' give his instructions an' +hat ! ha' to get rea'y for frying, etc When about rea'y ! +oul'ta&e a cu +ith curry in to hi) to taste an' tell )e +hat +as nee'e' #hen he +oul' al+ays ut the'elicious finishing touch that )a'e the) 4out=of=this=+orl'4 curries He stoo' over a hot stove forhours so)eti)es, +ith bea's of ersiration rolling 'o+n his forehea' an' face He al+ays taste' thefoo' to get the roer flavoring an' so)eti)es he +oul' taste boiling hot foo', but never burne' his)outh .aster7s saffron rice +as )a'e +ith +hite raisins an' blanche' al)on's, cinna)on stic&s, bayleaves, -anish saffron, sugar, an' salt #his 'ish +as so)ething to re)e)ber ! can still see hi))ashing a har'=boile' chic&en egg or 'uc& egg +ith his fingers, a''ing ghee 8clarifie' butter, salt an'rice !f it +as )ango season, +e )a'e )ore rice to have so)e left over so he coul' )i6 )ango ul,

sugar "n' crea) in the rice as a 'essert What fon' )e)ories this all brings bac& He never ate aloneHe al+ays ha' to share +ith others, esecially after services on -un'ays, at either (ol'en Aotus

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#e)le, Holly+oo', or -an Diego Church He +oul' fill his intervie+ roo)s +ith guests to eat +ithhi) Ho+ he 'elighte' to fee' all his siritual chil'ren .aster love' to ut the foo' on thein'ivi'ual7s lates an' if +e +ante' to be olite an' ass it on to the one +ho sat ne6t to us, he +oul'tell us to ta&e it bac& saying, 4! reare' that late for you ! serve each late for that erson, givingeach their articular blessings, an' it 'oes not belong to the other erson4 #hereafter, +e al+ays &et

the late he han'e' to us, an6ious to receive an' &ee our o+n secial blessingsating ti)e +as our one ti)e +e +ere all together We thought +e ha' )uch to say to each other

Poor .aster ha' to tell us several ti)es 'uring the )eal that he li&e' to eat in silence We +oul' &ee?uiet for a+hile, then +e +oul' +hiser or )a&e signs until he ha' to re)in' us again $ur greatestoy +as +hen .aster +oul' ta&e a inch of this or that +ith his Divine fingers fro) his o+n late, an'give it to us in our han' to taste that secial )orsel, i)regnate' +ith his blessing !t +as to us )annafro) heaven "fter our fa)ily 'inner, .aster +oul' tal& for a+hile, then li&e the Divine .others chil'that he +as, his large lotus eyes +oul' get heavier an' heavier an' his hea' finally resting to one si'e oron his chest, +oul' be soun' aslee #his icture al+ays re)in'e' us of baby ictures +e have seen ofbabies sitting in their high chairs sleeing Ho+ very recious are these )e)ories

.aster love' ban?uets an' cro+'s of souls #he night before the ban?uet he +oul' stay u allnight 'irecting the secial foo's on the )enu He al+ays ha' a 'ifferent )enu each ban?uet He love'to surrise eole an' )a&e the) guess hat +as in this or that He +oul' laugh +hen eole coul' nottell his substitutes fro) regular )eat He )a'e a tur&ey +ith ba)boo as bones "n' he even )a'e)arro+ in the bones He li&e' to )a&e substitute eggs< the yol& as +ell as the +hites He +as solease' +hen they coul'n7t tell the 'ifference .aster al+ays re)aine' cheerful throughout the night!t )a'e no 'ifference +hether he +as over a hot stove or tasting this or thatN chanting at ti)es, tellingstories, he &et our energies an' sirits u at all ti)es !f the foo' +e ha' coo&e' the night beforebecause of su))er heat +oul' soil, he +as never at a loss to &no+ +hat to 'o to re)e'y thesituation #he foo' ha' to be erfect, only then +oul' he be satisfie' He +as such a erfectionist atthat His hay countenance &et us going all night si'e by si'e +ith Hi)

! re)e)ber +hen .aster an' aasi first )ove' into the her)itage in ncinitas .aster coo&e' inthe utility &itchen locate' in the center of his an' aasi7s ?uarters He too& the greatest oy in tryingout ne+ recies to fee' aasi an' all of us When aasi ate all that .aster ut on his late .asterbea)e' +ith oy When aasi e6resse' 'elight over the foo', .aster +oul' s)ile an' say, 4He li&esit (ive hi) so)e )ore4 #he 'inner table +as the sar& that sent off the conversation of foo' .aster

+oul' tell us ho+ in !n'ia there +as a s)all roun' vegetable calle' atol that taste' so)ething li&e our!rish otato but +as far suerior in taste He +oul' relate the 'ifferent recies )a'e +ith atol Ho+elate' .aster +as +hen he receive' his first fresh atol fro) !n'ia #his calle' for a coo&ingcelebration We all got a s)all iece, an' ! )ust say it +as everything that he ha' clai)e' it +as $r,.aster +oul' tell us ho+ !n'ia ha' foot=long string beans an' e?ually long nglish cucu)bers or 1;=to 2@=inch=long Chicago s?uashN this +as the )ost 'elicious vegetable frie' in butter #here +as the

s+eet s?uash that .aster love', +hich he urchase' at our Chinato+n #he )ango season +oul' startthe ball rolling for .aster to e6lain that in !n'ia there +ere 2@@ varieties of )angoes an' ho+ eachone +as 'ifferent fro) the other .aster lante' )ango trees at .t Washington #he year that .aster

+as arriving in %e+ *or& fro) his tri to !n'ia, his first rie )ango ca)e into being We shie' oneor t+o )angoes air )ail to hi) to %e+ *or&, so he +oul' have the first )angoes off his o+n trees

!n the earlier 'ays, it +as har' to fin' )angoes We coul' only urchase the) in a .e6ican to+ngroceries an' ?uite e6ensively, but .aster al+ays )anage' to get so)e !n later years, +e ha' so)ecenter lea'ers in 5lori'a, an' they sent .aster )angoes -till later, )ore eole shie' hi) so)e,until they ca)e in strea)s an' .aster ha' all the )angoes he coul' +ant, an' +as able, to his greatestoy, to give to everyone in the house, one )ango a iece very ti)e they ca)e in bushel bas&ets, +e

ha' )angoes srea' every+here, even in the tub $h, ho+ he love' thatF He +oul' shi bo6es toaasi to :ansas City or ncinitas aasi in turn or'ere' so)e fro) 5lori'a an' +oul' sen' .asterso)e too, so +e ha' our 'elightful fill of )angoes .aster love' litchi nuts #he fresh ones +ere so

148



very goo' #hey are re'=shelle' an' +hite on the insi'e, uicy an' s+eet +hen rie, they are certainly'electable .aster foun' in -an Diego an orchar' that ha' several litchi nut trees He bought all thelitchi nuts fro) the tree an' reserve' the) for the follo+ing season He shie' bo6es to aasi, afterhe ha' +atche' an' riene' the) for hi)N or .aster +oul' &ee the) in the refrigerator until aasi

+oul' co)e ho)e We coul' al)ost taste the fresh, soft, crea)y coconut an' the )il& +hen .aster

+oul' 'escribe the) to us We +ere able to urchase cheri)oyas fro) a grove in ncinitas #hey are'elicious an' .aster love' the) He +oul' go into great 'etail about the cheri)oyas they ha' in !n'ia #hey +ere )uch s)aller but s+eet as honey ! can still see .aster cutting the to of the assion fruitan' +ith both han's, s?uee>ing the uicy, see'y ul into his )outh We ha' vines gro+ing on thefence at the Paaya grove .aster Dear love' the saota too #he avoca'o +as a ne+ fruit for .aster

When he ca)e to this country, he love' to e6eri)ent +ith the), but he foun' that they beca)e verybitter if coo&e' He use' to )a&e 'elicious 'esserts +ith the avoca'o )ashe' +ith sugar an' a littlecrea) an' .aor (rey7s chutney ! can still taste it He also li&e' to )ash avoca'os +ith a''e' onionuice an' garlic an' real hot chiliN salt to taste an' fill the chaati, ))))) goo'

.aster7s favorite toic +as the Jac&fruit of !n'ia He +oul' tal& a half=hour on that one fruitalone, for there +ere so )any recies you coul' )a&e fro) it, at 'ifferent rieness #his fruit is as tall

as a )an is an' e?ually as big aroun', an' ho+ )any 'ifferent varieties of recies one coul' )a&efro) the ul, others +ith the see's, an' still others +hen the fruit +as real rie He +oul' say, 4!cant 'escribe to you +hat a +on'erful fruit this isN an' so )any uses it can be ut to4 #he aaya +asanother fruit he enoye' here, but !n'ia7s aayas +ere far s+eeter +ith )any varieties to choose fro)He never cease' raising aasi7s s+eet oranges an' graefruits an' uicy tangerines, he love' the)above any other citrus fruit .aster 'i' not li&e sour fruits such as berriesN unless, of course, there +asa lot of sugar on the) .aster sel'o) ate ies, ca&es, or coo&ies, although he 'i' enoy !n'ians+eet)eats .aster use' to sen' hours )a&ing s+eet)eats for !n'ian guests an' )a'e a lot for allthe rest of us to enoy +ith hi) as +ell He )a'e +hite ashagulas -o)e he +oul' 'ee=fry bro+nan' then boil in heavy syru #he -un'ish +ith istachio nuts on to +as so goo'N all )a'e +ith )il&or chana But .aster7s Halvah +as out of this +orl' %o one can ever )a&e it li&e he coul'

.aster 'i' not che+ gu) He trie' it, he +oul' che+ it only +ith his front teeth, never on thesi'es We sho+e' hi) ho+, but he reverte' to the front che+ing

.aster 'i' not 'rin& coffee When he first ca)e to this country, he 'i' not &no+ that coffee coul'beco)e a habit He 'ran& it an' +herever he +ent they serve' hi) coffee $ne 'ay he +as alone, an'

+hen he coul' not get coffee an' he )isse' it, he sai' to hi)self, 4-o you )iss coffee 'o you, very +ell then you shall never 'rin& it again,4 an' he never 'i' He use' to tell us if a habit )a&es a slave ofyou then it is ti)e to ?uit #he sa)e thing haene' about the ginger ale !t taste' to hi) li&e a 'rin&they have in !n'ia %o )atter +here he travele', his frien's +oul' shi ginger ale to hi) $ne 'ay he)isse' the ginger aleN this too he ut asi'e, as he 'i' coffee, though once in a great +hile he +oul''rin& ginger ale

$ne 'ay one of his frien's as&e' hi) if he ha' ever taste' beer .aster ans+ere', 4%o4 #hefrien' coa6e' .aster to try it .aster reeate'ly refuse' #hen the frien' sai', 45or )y sa&e, ust tasteit4 #o lease hi), .aster 'ie' the ti of his little finger in the beer, an' touche' his tongue saying,4Well, you +ante' )e to taste it, so ! 'i' !t is bitter, ! 'ont li&e it, an' even if ! 'i' li&e it, ! +oul'nt'rin& it4 $nce .aster +as invite' to a society arty +here they +ere all 'rin&ing Coc&tails #heyoure' .aster a glass He +as sitting ne6t to a -cots)an #o the -cots)an7s 'elight, .aster oure' hisli?uor in his glass #he servant ca)e an' refille' .aster7s glass again #his +ent on for so)e ti)e-u''enly, so)eone sai', 4-+a)i is a goo' sort, he is 'rin&ing right along +ith us4 .aster thought,4$h )y goo'ness, ! a) in a sot, they +ill thin& !7ve been 'rin&ing an' bran' )e a 'run&ar'4 #henthe Aor' ca)e to his rescue, an' one of the guests so&e u an' sai', 4%ay, not so, if you +ill ta&e a

loo& at the -cots)an sitting ne6t to hi), you +ill see that he has ha' )ore than his share, for the-+a)i has been ouring his li?uor into the -cots)an7s glass all the ti)e an' hasn7t even ha' one'ro4 #hat save' .aster7s reutation, an' he thought never again +oul' ! 'o this, for that +as 'ose

149



He 'i' not care +hether they thought hi) a goo' sort or not He +ent about in his o+n siritualrefusal of anything offere' hi) .aster uhel' his rinciles all the ti)e

! +rite all this about foo' because of +hat .aster tol' us, 4#hat the ull that )a&es the soulreincarnate on this earth is 'esire, an' the only +ay to get out of these rebirths is to learn to beco)e'esireless #he heavy loa' of 'esire +eighs you bac& to +here the 'esires are for)e'4 .aster use' to

tell this story, 4#hat if you have a 'esire for ale ie you +ill have to co)e bac& here in ")erica toeat your ale ie, because only in ")erica is ale ie )a'e, but +hen the loa' is 'roe' you)igrate to a finer shere of e6istence4 He has sai' also, 4#hat souls +ho are alrea'y liberate' +hoco)e bac& on this earth to hel others have no 'esiresN therefore, they 'eliberately ta&e on a har)less'esire in or'er to &ee the bo'y fro) )elting into the !nfinite before their +or& is acco)lishe'4.aster inti)ate' that he ha' ta&en the 'esire of eating an' foo', for it +as a har)less 'esire an' coul'har) no one Ho+ very rivilege' +e +ere an' still are that he so love' (o'7s chil'ren to the e6tentof +eighing hi)self 'o+n to this )un'ane +orl' for our sa&e

%aster1s Skin

.aster7s s&in +as that of an ast !n'ian, bluish, gol'en hue !t +as e6tre)ely soft an' velvety,esecially on his face, han's, an' feet ven +hen he +al&e' in his bathing trun&s in the +in' an' sun +ithout using oils, his s&in re)aine' soft to the en', though he use' Barbs an' talcu) o+'er aftershaving

,oice

*ou have hear' .aster7s voice on recor's an' taesN therefore, ! can only a'' that seeing thee6ression of his eyes an' face an' gestures, lus the o+er of his o+n soul7s ercetion, gave the

voice a o+er of conviction Hearing his voice on the lecture latfor), singing or tal&ing, )any +ereheale' of bo'y, )in', an' soul -uch +or's of +is'o) an' love ca)e through one of (o'7s greatest

vehicles, .aster an' his (o' o+er='riven voice

Sleeplessness

%ightti)e +as +hen .aster 'i' )ost of his +riting He +as ust as active 'uring the night as he +as'uring the 'ay, for night or 'ay +as the sa)e to hi) .aster 'i' very little rea'ing, but he &et u +iththe ti)es by rea'ing the ne+saer or having so)eone rea' it to hi) !ntervie+s so)eti)es laste' toall hours of the night -ince .aster 'i' not slee, he +oul' forget that others 'i' When he as&e' for atelehone nu)ber, +e +oul' re)in' hi) of the ti)e an' that the erson +oul' be aslee an' +oul'not areciate being a+a&ene' in the )i''le of the night !f he &ne+ the erson +ell enough he +oul'call any+ay, or he +oul' call Dr Ae+is on the house hone an' tal& for hours so)eti)es $r, he

+oul' call ugene Benau an' others 'uring the night When he calle' .t Washington, he tal&e' to

several ersons at .t Washington He ha' no 'esire to, nor 'i' he +ant to slee Whenever +e as&e'hi) if he +as going to be', he +oul' ans+er, 4Don7t )ention be' to )e, ! hate be'4 .aster ha'absolutely no consciousness of ti)eN therefore, he ha' no 'efinite ti)e set asi'e to go to be' ! believehe +ent to his be'roo) in or'er that +e +oul' get our )uch nee'e' rest an' slee When he'is)isse' us he +oul' say, 45irst )e'itation an' then slee4 #his coul' be any ti)e bet+een )i'nightan' a) #he a)ount of his slee varie' fro) t+o to si6 hours, an' )ost of the ti)e only fourhours .aster never faile' to )e'itate before slee He +as )ostly conscious 'uring slee #herefore,it +as )ore of a )e'itation than slee to hi) #he only ti)e +e &ne+ he +as aslee +as +hen +e

+al&e' ast his be'roo) 'oor an' hear' lou' snoring or the 'ee breathing of a soun' slee .aster,ho+ever, too& several short nas 'uring the 'ay or evening, esecially after his )eals $r, if he +asrea'ing his ne+saer, he e6laine' that he fell aslee +hile rea'ing because he ha' ractice' the

three=eye=level consciousness so )uch that +hen his eyes +ere lo+ere', they auto)atically +ent intothe subconsciousness, but he coul' not go to slee if his eyes +ere straight ahea' or in bet+een theeyebro+s #he seat of conscious an' suerconscious levels

150



"riting

-o)e of .aster7s greatest +ritings +ere +ritten in the ncinitas her)itage He re)aine' in his roo)s +hen he +as +riting .ost of the ti)e he +rote long han' $ther ti)es he 'ictate' to Daya7sshorthan', or Daya an' .atai +oul' alternate ta&ing 'ictation on the tye+riter #his is the +ay he

li&e' best for he sai' he coul' have the) rea' it bac& to hi) an' he coul' correct or clarify a thoughti))e'iately +ithout having to re=rea' .aster +rote his "utobiograhy of a *ogi, -econ' Co)ing ofChrist, an' so)e of the (ita in ncinitas #he rest of the (ita he +rote in #+enty=%ine Pal)s Duringthe course of all these years, .aster +rote )any other ge)s, +hich flo+e' fro) the 'eth of hissiritual ercetion for the benefit of the +orl' for centuries to co)e

Reading /a(its

.aster sai' that he 'i' not rea' )ore than a 'o>en boo&s in his life ! can +ell believe that, because inall the years that ! have been in 'ose contact +ith hi), ! sa+ that +hen he 'i' ta&e u a boo& he onlyrea' a+hile an' never ic&e' the boo& u again He 'i', ho+ever, rea' the ne+saers to &ee u

+ith the ti)es He 'i' not li&e to have his ne+saer )esse' u by anyone He +ante' to see it firstan' )ost of us resecte' his +ishes in this )atter He +oul' get to rea' the aer anyti)e 'uring the'ay or )ostly at night -o)e of us +ere al+ays in atten'ance to his nee's, an' +hen a fe+ of us gottogether, +e +oul' al+ays fin' so)ething to say to each other .aster +oul' ut his aer 'o+nsaying, 4! a) a oor rea'er, ! can7t rea' +hen you all tal&, re)ain ?uiet if you +ant to stay in theroo)4 We &et ?uiet for a little +hile, but +oul' +hiser He +oul' say, 4! still can hear your

+hisers,4 then +e +oul' resort to sign language "lso, this 'isturbe' hi), for he coul' feel ourrestlessness -o)eti)es one of us +oul' rea' to hi) By a oor rea'er, he )eant that his )in' +asuse' to going +ithin +hen he +oul' start to rea' His )in' reverte' +ithin an' it +as har' for hi) tobring his )in' on the obect in ?uestion an', therefore, the least tal&ing or noise +oul' 'istract his)in' fro) the rea'ing )atter

"ar& 9;9

.aster follo+e' the +ar fro) the beginning to its ter)ination He rea' or ha' one of us rea' alou' tohi) all the ne+saer articles on the activities of +arN esecially 'uring the Jaanese +ar, for hisbelove' !n'ia +as in 'anger "n' ho+ .aster raye' an' suffere' for !n'ia7s fight for free'o) an' itsfa)ine years His 'ee concern for ")erica +as that she 'i' not )a&e too )any serious )ista&es iniling u ba' &ar)a for herself through +rong 'ecisions on +ar )aneuvers His heart +as in constantrayer for the boys in the battlefiel', their bro&en=hearte' )others, an' their fa)ilies He suffere' +itheach soul that fell +oun'e' on the battlefiel', in the air an' at sea He +as +ith the) in -irit as theyfell Ho+ 'eely he felt the uselessness of &illing the best of the young )en of any nation, 'estroyingbuil'ings that too& years to buil' an' ay for .aster al+ays sai' that &illing eole an' 'estroying

buil'ings 'i' not solve anything (ree' +as the cause of +ars #he uselessness of +ar +as constantlyon his sensitive an' loving heart

A*erica

.aster has often sai' that his ")erican stu'ents, 'isciles, an' frien's +ere his real relatives When +e +oul' be on tris an' ha' to sto at so)e re)ote lace, +e +oul' fin' lenty to eat, goo' be'roo)s +ith baths, +ell=e?uie' )otels or cabins #he restaurants serve' ice +aterN one coul' al+ays getcrea) or )il& or anything that coul' be foun' in the city .asters constant re)ar& of a)a>e)ent +as,4#here is no lace li&e ")erica, +e can get everything an' anything, any+here, or anylace4 "n' thenagain, 4")ericans can ta&e an i'ea an' i)rove on it an' they 'ont sto at that but continue to try

an' i)rove on it -uch ractical an' rogressive )in's are boun' to success4 His 'ee areciationof ")erica )a'e us reali>e ho+ )uch +e too& for grante' an' ho+ rivilege' +e +ere that +e are ")ericans

151



Regarding %one$

.aster li&e' to have so)e )oney in his oc&et, but it +as usually to buy things for the 'isciles or givea 'ollar or so to the boys or the others aroun' the her)itage He li&e' to barter +ith cler&s an' +oul'stan' at a counter trying to re'uce the rice of an ite) he ha' in )in' until the )an gave it to hi) at

his rice #hen .aster +oul' give the )an a heavy ti, +hich +oul' )a&e u for the rice it +as in thefirst lace -o)eti)es he +oul' receive a gift or buy so)e things for hi)self he really li&e' an' he

+oul' )a&e u his )in' to &ee this ti)e $ne 'ay +e +oul' notice that the article or articles +eregoneN he ha' given it a+ay to so)eone +ho +oul' a')ire it He 'i' not see a chil' that he 'i' not givea coin to

! use' to be at the boo& table at the te)le an' ! too& care of the collection, counte' )oney, an'gave it to .aster for the )iscellaneous e6enses !n the )i''le of the +ee&, +hen he +oul' as& )e forthe collection )oney, ! +oul' say, 4! gave it to you, -ir4 4When 'i' you give it to )e, +hat hasbeco)e of itO4 he +oul' ans+er -o in or'er to refresh his )e)ory of getting it, ! sai' no+, 4-ir, everyti)e ! give you the collection )oney fro) no+ on 8the a)ount +as so s)all, ! +ill have you initial a

iece of aer +ith the 'ate an' the a)ount given you so there +ont be any confusion in the future4He +oul' s)ile every ti)e ! gave the )oney an' the sli to initial, he never forgot ! gave it to hi)thereafter an' +e +ere both hay ! still have those little slis he so s+eetly initiale'

4ri)ing a Car

.aster never 'rove a car $nce he 'i' try, he sai', 4! +ent on the si'e+al&, >ig>agging all over theroa' #he erson that +as +ith )e never forgot that ri'e -ri *u&tes+ari ha' blesse' )e saying that !

+oul' al+ays have so)eone to ta&e )e +herever ! +ante' to go, an' that blessing has never faile'4

"orking

.aster 'i' not nee' to 'o )anual labor any)ore, for he ha' finishe' that hase of his training +hilehe +as +ith his (uru in !n'ia He so)eti)es +ent out to s+ee the si'e+al&s an' the tennis court tobe an e6a)le to us all, an' he stoo' for hours on en', rearing foo' an' coo&ing He never lifte'heavy bur'ens, for he ha' enough carrying our heavy &ar)ic bun'les +ithout a''ing to the +eight "sregar'ing .aster +or&ing, +hen you rea' his letters to aasi for each roect he create', an' theacco)anying history ! +rote about each roect, you +ill reali>e the tre)en'ous +ill an' +or& he ha'to e6ercise, to acco)lish all in his short san of life When he +or&e', it +as +ith full concentrationan' +ill an' ersonal >eal, not for hi)self but only for his siritual chil', -5 He too& the )ission his.asters ha' lace' on hi), an' +or&e' at, +ith all the intensity of bo'y, )in', an' heart, +hile hissoul reoice' in (o'=contact to rovi'e the ast, resent, an' future generations of our -5 fa)ily an'the +orl', an organi>ation +hose teachings are for its o+n salvation an' the +orl's .aster never tol'

us his lans ahea' of ti)e, even if +e ha' to +or& +ith hi) on these lans, for he sai' that -atan +oul' ste in to ut a sto to it or change it so)eho+ "fter the i'ea ha' )ateriali>e', then he +oul'tell us +hat his lans ha' been We never &ne+ if he +as lanning a ban?uet until he +oul' announceit fro) the latfor) t+o -un'ays ahea' He +oul' receive his vision or thought an' then silently butsurely ursue its )ateriali>ation .aster +rites to aasi on .ay 12, 190@, 4Please &ee this )atter of)y going to !n'ia, !f (o' +ills absolutely secret, )y .aster al+ays a'vise' secrecy regar'ing lans4

%o)ies

.aster +ent to the )ovies to get a+ay fro) the telehone or !ntervie+s He li&e' +esterns, horror, orfighting ictures, for it &et his )in' out+ar' )ore, but )ost of the ti)e he +as in )e'itation an'

+atching the inner )ovie of (o' !n the theater, he li&e' to have the 'isciles aroun' hi) He +oul'

as& the erson to )ove u to )a&e roo) for one of us, or if +e +ere scattere' aroun', as the eolenear hi) +oul' leave, he +oul' have us co)e over to hi), until he ha' us all aroun' hi) He li&e'

152



laying by o&ing this or that one +ith his cane, an' then reten'ing innocence to the act $r, he +oul' )a&e little curls of :leene6 an' very carefully ut the) in the 'iscile7s hair +ho +as sitting infront of hi) When they +oul' get u +ithout &no+ing that they ha' all that aer in their hair, he

+oul' have lots of fun He li&e' for a short erson to sit in the front seat ahea' of hi), so he coul'see over the) !f a stranger +as there an' nothing coul' be 'one about it, he +oul' )ove aroun' until

he ha' a short one in front %aturally, +e al+ays gave hi) the seat that ha' a short erson ahea' !fthe )ovies +ere funny he +oul' laugh so lou', an' he +oul' oun' his cane an' sto) his feet onthe floor +ith laughter $ur (urui +as a hay, layful soulN there +as no sho+ or retense ofholiness in his )a&e=u He use' to say, 4Why be sa', for +hen you ta&e u the ath to+ar's (o', itis a hay event not a sa' one, for it is the 'eath of all 'elusion4 He a''e', 4#hose that reten' atholiness are usually the ones +ho have to +or& har' trying to convince others of their saintliness orholier=than=thou attitu'e, but those that are genuine 'on7t have to reten', they nee' only to be anatural4

+la$-ul

He use' to call fro) his roo)s or &itchen +in'o+ to a 'iscile that ha' the roo)s belo+ his, an'

+hen the 'iscile ut their hea' out only a little, he use' to say, 4Co)e out a little further, ! can7t seeyou4 "n' +hen they 'i' so, he +oul' our a an full of +ater on their hea's an' then roar +ithlaughter He +as full of )ischief an' fun He use' to +ear scuffs aroun' the house, that is, in hisroo)s When he ca)e out into the hall+ay an' sa+ one or )ore of us stan'ing in the hall, he +oul'ai) +ith his feet an' thro+ his scuffs at us, an' )ore often than not he +oul' hit a bull7s eye, then he

+oul' bounce +ith laughter When ! first ca)e, he as&e' )e to sit at the table +ith hi) He too& along brea' &nife an' )a'e )e thro+ a otato u in the air over the table, an' ?uic& as a flash he ha'cut the otato in t+o ! continue' to thro+ the otato until there +as nothing left of it He love' tolay sleight of han' tric&s an' )any other layful tric&s he laye' on his 'isciles, an' ho+ hay it)a'e hi) He +oul' )a&e a retense of hitting )e an' then hit the erson ne6t to )e, or ta&e +aterin his )outh an' s?uirt it at us .any layful actions li&e that hele' to &ee us balance', because our

activities +ere constant #o hear hi) laugh +as to laugh also, no )atter if +e un'erstoo' or not Helove' to tell o&es an' so)eti)es he +oul' only tell half, an' he laughe' through the rest of the story

We laughe' +hether +e un'erstoo' the o&e or not for his laughter +as so contagious

/u*an Traits

When a liberate' soul li&e our belove' .aster co)es on earth, they 'eliberately ta&e a hu)an for)an' hence act li&e a hu)an $ther+ise, ho+ coul' +e un'erstan' the) #hey co)e 'o+n to ourhu)an level, though in+ar'ly they re)ain on their siritual level in or'er to all the better correct our)ental an' siritual levels to raise our level of un'erstan'ing !f they re)aine' aloof, +e +oul' not beable to act natural #hence they coul' not correct or &ee us on the straight an' narro+ ath an' sho+

us the itfalls of the ra>ors e'ge #hat he con'escen'e' to co)e 'o+n to this earth, &no+ing ofgreater an' better +orl's an' the sacrifice he ha' to )a&e for our sa&e, is truly a )iracle #he 'eth ofhis an' (o'7s love for us, their +ay+ar' chil'ren

Radio

#here +as nothing .aster li&e' better than to be 'oing things that +oul' ush the +or& for+ar' Hetoo& great ri'e in his ra'io tal&s

Canting

.aster love' to have san&irtans +ith us all He usually laye' the har)oniu) an' le' us in chanting

He laye' the large 'ru) too He coul' )a&e that big 'ru) really boo) His fingers +oul' go li&elightning on the tabla 'ru)s He )a'e the esra tal& .aster love' to 'e)onstrate his ability of layingthe 'ifferent instru)ents He certainly laye' the) e?ually +ell an' e6ressively When he +ent into a

153



'ee )e'itation or sa)a'hi, he usually ca)e out +ith a ne+ insiring chant, giving vent in +or's the'eth of his ercetion #hen he chante' that one over an' over again, every'ay or 'uring eveningti)e or on other occasions for )onths on en', as he sai', 4#o sirituali>e the),4 though they +erealrea'y sirituali>e' for he ha' receive' the +or's fro) (o' When he chante', one coul' feel the)eaning he ut behin' the +or's for he chante' +ith his heart an' )in', not +ith ust his voice

-o)eti)es after he )a'e a ne+ chant, he +oul' not chant the ol' ones for a long ti)e an' then, +henhe 'i', he +oul' start in a 'ifferent lace an' use 'ifferent +or's in laces, for he ha' forgotten the)-o, +e +oul' chant lou'er, so he +oul' ic& u the right note or +or' an' the ne6t ti)e aroun' he

+oul' sing it as he use' to have it before #o+ar's the en' of his life, he use' to chant +ith theyounger generation an' +e ol'er ones +ere busy +ith our resective 'uties, an' +e +ere not able tohel hi) re)e)ber the right notes or +or's #hat is the reason so )any chant 'ifferently

Tra)el

.aster +as a nature lover He sa+ beauty in everything an' +rote )any beautiful oe)s an'i)ressions through his love for nature in general $ne only has to rea' so)e of his oe)s to see thathe sa+ (o' in all nature $ne can rea' in his "utobiograhy ho+ he too& every oortunity to travel

+hen he +as a boy, his love for travel re)aine' +ith hi) throughout his life He +as ever rea'y an'eager to travel ! 'on7t believe there +ere )any laces in ")erica an' !n'ia an' uroe he 'i' not see

#he +an'ering sanyasin of yore +as still re'o)inant in this life, though in the )o'ern )eans oftravel He love' to see ne+ laces an' 'ifferent scenery .aster use' to say a erson +ho gives so)uch of hi)self for all has to get a+ay fro) the general routine of events to recharge oneself .asterbought his first housecar in 193@ !t +as an ol' one, not the trailer=tye they have these 'ays, but the&in' +here the bo'y is locate' +ith the chassis an' the )otor an' all in one iece .aster use' thehousecar a great 'eal to get a+ay fro) telehone calls, !ntervie+s, an' to +rite, travel, an' haveicnics We coul' not al+ays affor' hotels, cabins, or restaurants Wherever +e +ent, +e ha' ourcoo&ing e?ui)ent han'y We +oul' sto at a nice lace or un'er a tree, ull out all the coo&ingutensils an' foo's an' coo& on an ol' gasoline stove, +hich +e ha' to u) every fe+ )inutes in

or'er to get any coo&ing 'one at allN an' the thing s)o&e', so it too& us ages to get the blac& off thebotto) of the ans .aster thoroughly enoye' those outings an' so 'i' +e .aster slet in thehousecar, +hich )a'e into a be' Carson, or the other 'rivers, slet outsi'e besi'e the car, an' the restat a goo' 'istance a+ay

We al+ays 'rove until late at night When .aster +ante' to sto, +e 'i' so, any+here -o)eti)esit +as so 'ar& +e coul' not see +here +e ha' ar&e' an' the ne6t )orning +e +oul' fin' +e +ereal)ost in so)eone7s bac&yar'

.aster love' to go to the beach $ne ti)e +e +ent to Dana Point, California, an' ar&e' on thecliff overloo&ing the sea We re)aine' there for several 'ays $ne afternoon the four of us E that is.aster, :arla -chra)), Carson, an' )yself E +ere stan'ing in a ro+ loo&ing out at the sea While +e

+ere ga>ing out to sea, several rays of light slanting to+ar's the ocean aeare' in the s&y !t +as li&esunrays iercing through the clou's $ne of us )entione' it to .aster He reoicingly sai', 4! a) gla'you are all seeing this )iracle fro) (o'4 !t +as this occasion that insire' .aster to +rite an'co)ose the chant, 4Co)e Aisten to .y -oul -ong4

"nother ti)e in the Pal) -rings Canyon, .aster +ashe' his hair in the broo& an' sat on a largeroc& to )e'itate, +hile the +ar) sun 'rie' his hair He +ent into a very 'ee ecstasy #his occasionalso insire' .aster to +rite an' co)ose another one of his chants, 4Co)e $ut of the -ilent -&y4

arly in 1931, .aster left Aos "ngeles for his ca)aign in Denver He too& the train an'instructe' :arla, )y brother, an' )yself to 'rive the housecar an' oin hi) in Denver "fter theclasses, +e 'rove to Colora'o -rings for a vacation .aster ha' rente' a house, +hich +as a )inister7s

resi'ence, +ho ha' gone on a )onth7s leave !t +as a neat, co)fortable house When +e left, .asterleft his -cience of eligion boo& +ith his inscrition an' a than&=you note for the )inister an' his

154



+ife .aster hear' fro) the )inister later, than&ing hi) for the boo& an' saying ho+ lease' they +ere to fin' the house in better or'er than they ha' left it During this ti)e, so)e of the )e)bershele' .aster buy a convertible, four=seater 5or' Ho+ .aster thrille' an' enoye' sitting on the veryto, using the bac& seat as a foot stool, ta&ing the full benefit of Colora'o7s beautiful vie+ -everal)e)bers +ante' to co)e bac& to Aos "ngeles +ith .aster He +as in his glory to have a caravan

follo+ hi), enoying the sights of Bryce, Sion, an' other sights on the +ay Aate in 193@, .aster too&a large grou on an outing in the housecar "t the en' of an enoyable icnic, before leaving, it +as.aster7s habit to )e'itate +ith all #he uholstere' seats, +hen the bac& +as lai' 'o+n, )a'e into abe' for .aster to occuy at night #his +as 'one on this occasion to )a&e )ore seating caacity.aster +as seate' in the center +ith his bac& against the +all -everal of us +ere sitting on the e'ge ofthe be' on each si'e of hi) .aster +ent into a very 'ee ecstasy During the )e'itation he +as

+ar), too& off his coat, an' lai' it ne6t to hi) .uch later, ttie Bletch, +ho ha' ust arrive' at .t Washington, an' +as seate' ne6t to )e, not &no+ing that one 'oes not at any ti)e use a guru7sclothing on oneself or on other ersons, sa+ that ! +as col', too& .aster7s coat, an' thre+ it over )yshoul'ers #he )inute it hit )y bo'y, ! felt li&e an electric +ave enetrate' )y +hole being When !sa+ +hose coat she ha' use', ! unhesitatingly starte' to ta&e it off .aster stoe' )e saying, 4Don7t

ta&e it off4 What countless blessings ! an' the others have receive' in the resence of this livingChrist=li&e soul, an' this inci'ent sho+s us that vibrations 'o re)ain i)regnate' in the clothing an'the surroun'ings of one +ho is e)erge' in (o'

#his housecar +as later given to the %ero'es as a )eans of transortation an' ho)e for theirca)aign +or& bac& ast an' the .i'+est, they later sol' it

!n 193K, after .aster gave his housecar to the %ero'es, :arla hele' hi) buy a secon' housecar #his too +as the sa)e tye as the first, but, in a''ition, it ha' a sho+er, stove, toilet, etc !t +as +ellbuilt, but the chassis an' )otor +ere not too goo' !n .arch 1930, .aster bought a ne+ Do'gechassis He +as conte)lating ho+ the bo'y coul' be transferre' onto the ne+ chassis He loo&e' at)e an' ai', 4*ou 'o it4 #o )y consternation, ! ans+ere', 4But -ir, ! 'on7t &no+ the first thing about

such things4 He ans+ere', 4*ou7ll &no+ ho+, ! +ill +or& +ith you Castillo +ill +or& +ith you4 !as&e' Castillo to fin' a garage that +oul' have a crane to lift the bo'y off the ol' chassis an' lace iton the ne+ He foun' a garage on "venue @ in Highlan' Par& that +as e?uie' for our urose, !

+or&e' 'ay in an' 'ay out, si'e=by=si'e +ith Castillo, in grease, oil, an' 'irt fro) hea' to foot When +e starte' to ta&e the bo'y off the chassis, +e foun' to our astonish)ent that the bo'y +as only hel'by t+o bolts .y heart gave a lea, thin&ing bac& on ho+ often this housecar ha' gone u an' 'o+n

"venue K3, our stee hill, loa'e' +ith eole an' .aster What if these bolts ha' given +ay on the hill! ha' visions of the bo'y sliing off the chassis an' 'o+n the hill, +hile the )otor +as going u+ar',but all re)aine' safe in the fortress of (o's rotection "n' no+ +e +ere re)oving this ha>ar' bysecuring it +ith lenty of bolts We then foun' that the bo'y +as too long for the chassis 5ortunately,there +as an ol'=fashione' blac&s)ith ne6t 'oor ! consulte' hi), he )a'e strong e6tensions an'

sol'ere' the) to the chassis "fter +e 'rove the housecar bac& ho)e, ! ainte' the insi'e an' outsi'e of the bo'y #hen

.aster +ante' ne+ sring cushions ! )a'e the) )yself as +ell as uholstere' the), ne+ curtains,an' it +as rea'y for )ore icnics an' tris .aster +as )a'e very hay +ith the results

aasi only +ent on a short tri aroun' ncinitas +ith .aster an' a fe+ of us in the housecar Westill have this housecar bo'y, +e hoe to 'e'icate it as a shrine !t is no+ locate' in the bac& of the-5 cafe at ncinitas (o' +illing it +ill be 'one so)e'ay

%aster1s +ersonal +art in Our Crist*as Acti)ities

.aster loo&e' for+ar' +ith great anticiation to+ar's Christ)as He 'i' not go by an anti?ue sho or

a+n sho that he 'i' not sto to loo& for bargains He really +as able to get )any +on'erful things

This housear is still loated on S. grounds in Eninitas*

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an' +oul' gleefully later tell us, 4! got it for a song4 He shoe' an' collecte' ite)s the year roun'an' store' the) in his vault bo6 in his library, an' +hen Christ)as ca)e aroun', he 'ug into histreasure chest to give it all a+ay .aster ha' a fascination for so)ething ne+, an' )echanical)ove)ents of the toys intereste' hi) He coul' not resist buying several toys each Christ)as for gifts.aster use' to give things that +ere souvenirs instea' of ractical an' useful gifts He +as finally

convince' that useful gifts can be use', +hereas souvenirs, etc are ut a+ay or cant be use', orso)eti)es never loo&e' at again #hereafter, .aster 'elighte' in giving ractical an' useful gifts an' +oul' e6clai) +ith oy +hen he sa+ his gifts being use' +hen he ca)e in to see aasi !n the earlyyears, .aster often 'esigne' his o+n siritual Christ)as car's to sen' to his frien's an' )e)bers

.aster +oul' go on his last=)inute Christ)as shoing tour +hen he got ho)e early Christ)asve .aster an' all of us +ent to the 'o+nstairs &itchen to start the elaborate coo&ing rearations forthe ne6t 'ays Christ)as 'inner !t +as ! or 2 a) +hen +e +ere able to go bac& ustairs, then .aster

+oul' +ant to start +raing gifts He so)eti)es +rae' a fe+ he 'i' not +ant us to see He +roteall his gift tags "fter finishing an', erhas, a fe+ hours of slee, all +ent 'o+nstairs again to finishthe 'inner for the house )e)bers an' )any invite' guests .aster love' festivities #he )ore eole

+ere )illing about the house, the )ore he enoye' it He +as li&e a chil' 'uring the Christ)as

holi'ays, for Christ)as +as al+ays a very gay an' oyous event for .aster He li&e' elaborate'ecorations an' al+ays +ante' a large tree in the lobby -r -ailasuta, +ho) .aster ut in charge of'ecorating, certainly 'i' his trust in her ability to 'ecorate a ustice -he +ent all out to give hi), an'all, the )ost beautiful 'ecorations, that left one seechless .aster +as al+ays so 'elighte' +ith hersuerb efforts -he can better tell the rocesses of our 'elightful Christ)as 'ecorations an' rogra)sherself .aster ha' a s)all tree in his living roo) ustairs for hi)self an' a fe+ i))e'iate 'isciles

+ho 'aily serve' hi) He ha' us co)e to his living roo) to celebrate his ersonal Christ)as +ith hi),at +hich ti)e he gave us our gifts an' +e, ours to hi) .aster +oul' teasingly say, 4%o fair ee&ing,4or )ischievously say, 4-anta Claus is not bringing you anything this Christ)as,4 then +e +oul' &no+that he ha' alrea'y bought our gift .aster li&e' to give his ersonal gifts to us last, an' al+ays &etthe best for the cli)a6

Christ)as ve, .aster, +ith chil'=li&e eagerness, +oul' ten )inutes before )i'night loo& everyfe+ )inutes at his +atch, so he coul' at the stro&e of )i'night say, 4.erry Christ)as4 #hen he +oul'

+al& u an' 'o+n the halls saying, 4.erry Christ)as4 to everyone, +hether they ca)e out of theirroo)s or not to reson' or not, reoicing that he +as the first one to say 4.erry Christ)as4 5or the%e+ *ear, +e +oul' )e'itate the ol' year out an' +elco)e the %e+ *ear in +ith )e'itation, then he

+oul' be the first to say, 4Hay %e+ *ear4

.aster +as esecially hay if his little boy aasi ca)e for Christ)as, +hich +as not as often as(urui +ishe' .aster +oul' so)eti)es start in July coa6ing aasi to co)e for Christ)as .aster

+ante' to feel that aasi referre' co)ing here for Christ)as than staying in :ansas City Why aasicoul' not often co)e for Christ)as is e6laine' in his biograhy !f aasi coul' not co)e, .aster

+oul' insist that +e leave the tree u until he 'i' co)e $nce +e &et the oor tree until it +as only as&eleton 5inally, it ha' to be ta&en 'o+n #hen +hen aasi ca)e in "ril, .aster ha' a s)all artificialtree 'ecorate' in his ncinitas 'ra+ing roo), an' it +as Christ)as all over again for .aster an' aasian' the fe+ of us, but it +as aasi +ho got all the gifts #he house )e)bers7 e6change of gifts +ere'elivere' to each ones 'oor Christ)as ve !t +as an' still is a oyous feeling to hear the atter of feetgoing u an' 'o+n the halls leaving brightly +rae' gifts at each 'oor (ifts for .aster fro) all +erelace' un'er the lobby tree "t the Christ)as 'inner table, .aster +as al+ays the erfect host an' agoo' seech entertainer #he guests that flan&e' hi) on both si'es, an' all, glo+e' +ith hainessbeing in his resence He +oul' +al& all aroun' the tables greeting an' tal&ing to each one, no one +as)isse', an' blesse' by his thoughtful gesture "fter eating, .aster usually gave an insiring tal&,than&ing each one by na)e for his or her art in )a&ing this 'inner a success He +as al+ays rofuse

+ith his raises an' areciative of the least little effort )a'e He then chante'N a short )e'itation,an' then he7' ut his orange sha+l over his shoul'ers an' lay -anta Claus an' gave his gifts to each

156



one an' oene' his o+n gifts fro) frien's an' )e)bers !t too& hours to +a'e through all that $neof us +oul' han' hi) one gift an' tell hi) +ho) it +as for an' he in turn calle' their na)es !f they'i' not oen their gifts fast enough, he +oul' ri the ribbon an' aer off to hel the) an' +as )a'ehay +hen the receiver sho+e' oy over his gift !f there +ere )ore guests than gifts, .aster +oul'

+hiser his instructions to get so an' so, fro) here or there, +ra it, an' bring it 'o+n for so an' so

%o one +ent e)ty=han'e' fro) our Christ)as celebrations During the last years of .asters life, hisgifts fro) frien's an' )e)bers +ere too nu)erous to oen 'o+nstairs #hey +ere lace' un'er hisersonal ustairs tree an' he +oul' oen the) at his leisure an' enoye' it )uch )ore, for he ha'ti)e to really see an' areciate the gifts before they +ere ut a+ay .asters enthusias) an' oyoussirit +as contagious, his oy srea' throughout the house Christ)as +ith .aster +as a )e)orableone .t Washington ha' the reutation of having the haiest an' the )ost oyous Christ)asat)oshere, everyone felt the real Christ -irit, for +e also ha' a living Christ in our )i'st

Having Christ)as at our hea'?uarters +as a tra'ition .aster 'i' not, nor +oul' not, haveChrist)as any+here else #he sa)e alie' to the Christ)as all='ay )e'itation He starte' it onDece)ber 2K, 1932 !t +as such a beautiful, siritual event, that .aster )a'e it a tra'ition !n lateryears, so)eone suggeste' that it +oul' )a&e it easier to 'ecorate, finish +raing, an' reare 'inner,

etc, if the )e'itation +as on the 23r' "fter )uch ersuasion, he con'escen'e' to have it on the 23r'once #hat 'ay, Jesus aeare' to .aster )uch )ore often than at any other revious ti)es an' thee6erience +as so great that .aster 'efinitely felt that the 23r' +as )ore leasing to Jesus than the2Kth #herefore, the 23r' +as 'efinitely establishe' .aster set the attern that is no+ follo+e'

When .aster 'eely raye', the )agnetis) of his +or's enetrate' our )in's, an' +hen helaye' on the har)oniu) an' chante', he ulle' our hearts an' )in's along +ith hi) to 'eeer'eths ! laye' the big 'ru) an' Daya the cy)bals He +oul' signal +hen he +ante' us to lay an'

+hen to lay lou'er or faster #his beca)e a tra'ition, as +ell as )y singing .asters song, 4DivineAove -orro+s4

#hose )e'itation 'ays +ith .aster +ere not only 'eely i)rinte' in our conscious )in's, but

also in the archives of the subconscious, an' +ent still 'eeer into the suerconscious )in' toera'icate nu)erous ast, resent, an', ! hoe, future sychological &nots We ha' to be very un+ellnot to go to the )e'itation When .aster +oul' )ention that he sa+ Jesus, the vibrations +eretre)en'ous ! ?uote an e6cert of a letter .aster +rote to aasi on Dece)ber 1, 19K3, 4! thought !

+oul' never co)e out of ecstasy !t +as eight hours long Jesus ca)e three ti)es as a chil' in the cribof light, an' as a young )an, an' t+ice as he loo&e' before the crucifi6ion !n His eyes tre)ble' theco))an' of the universe, it +as a +on'erful )e'itation an' ! felt your -irit +ith )e4

-ince the 'earture of our belove' .aster fro) this earthly abo'e, he )a&es hi)self feltthroughout the holi'ays an' is very 'efinitely resent a)ongst us ! &no+, +ithout the sha'o+ of a'oubt, that he co)es to the ure in heart an' )in' an' fills the soul +ith His $)niresent love

Ba(a8i1s %essage

-oon after Brah)achari Pre)es+ars arrival fro) !n'ia at ncinitas, .aster calle' us to his roo) He +as sitting on the e'ge of his be' hol'ing one han' over the other We sat on the floor before hi) Herelate' this story to us Just before Pre)es+ar 8later calle' -+a)i Beyonan'a e)bar&e' for ")erica, a'iscile of -ri *u&tes+ari ca)e to Pre)es+ar an' gave hi) this )essage to bring to our .aster in

")erica, 4"s a grou of us +as stan'ing in a fiel', +e su''enly felt a gust of +in' !t s+et the other)en a+ay e6cet )e "s ! stoo' alone in a)a>e)ent, Babai aeare' before )e ! hear' Babai7s)elo'ious voice say, #ell Pre)es+ar to ta&e this see' to *oganan'a in ")erica *oganan'a +illun'erstan' its significance7 With this Babai 'isaeare'4 on his arrival in ncinitas, Pre)es+artol' .aster the circu)stances an' )essage an' 'elivere' the see' "fter telling us this, .aster oene'

his han's Aying in the al) of his sacre' han's +as a see' the si>e of a thu)bnail, shae' into thehea' of a hoo'e' cobra .aster lace' the sacre' see' to each of our siritual eyes "s it touche' )e, !

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felt a tre)en'ous siritual force entere' )y hea' an' +ith it, a subtle siritual burning sensation laste'for a long ti)e after+ar's !t is still in ncinitas +here .aster lace' it

Touced %aster1s 0eet

!t +as only +hen Pre)es+ar ca)e to ncinitas that +e notice' that he touche' .aster7s feet an' then

touche' his o+n forehea', as a )ar& of resect to one7s (uru #his +as the first ti)e +e ha' seen thisgesture #herefore, each one follo+e' suit, our )ornings7 greeting an' goo'night to (urui +as to ta&ethe 'ust of his feet .aster +as so hu)ble, he never tol' us this !n'ian custo) of ta&ing the 'ust ofthe (uru7s feet, nor 'i' he ever refer to hi)self as our (uru, but as a frien' He never correcte' us

+hen +e 'i' not &no+ the roer actions regar'ing a (uru ! re)e)ber +hen ! first sat ne6t to.aster, ! sai', 4Why is it that every ti)e ! co)e in your resence, ! +ant to &neel before youO4 He 'i'not say a +or', but only ointe' to the siritual eye We +ere so blesse'ly !gnorant on ho+ to treat agreat (uru, only by observing a fe+ things, li&e Pre)es+ar touching .asters feet, 'i' +e begin tolearn at least a fe+ resectful actions to+ar's one7s (uru

%aster1s Birtda$s Cele(rations

! a) often aalle' at our ")erican ignorance to+ar's siritual ersonages #he sa)e +ith hisbirth'ays He +oul' not tell, after fin'ing ones (uru, that one is suose' to forsa&e all otherrelationshis an' +orshi only his sacre' birth'ays Do you thin& he +oul' tell us thatO $nly once he)entione' it to )e, saying, 4!n !n'ia only the (uru7s birth'ays are celebrate'4 %or +oul' he tell usho+ to celebrate it !n !n'ia, they our everything at the (uru7s feet Pre)es+ar tol' -r -ailasuta ho+to 'o it, but she foun' +hile she +as in !n'ia that Pre)es+ar 'i' not tell her the half of it, not as)uch as they 'o in !n'ia -o again, +e +ent our ignorant +ays He sai', 4-ince you celebrate )ybirth'ay, you )ust celebrate each other7s,4 but again, it +as his great hu)bleness that )a'e hi) saythat

+re8udice.aster, being a )an of (o', regar'e' all as (o's chil'ren He +as able to )entally ush asi'e )anyeole7s reu'ices, instances +here so)eone e6resse' reu'ice, because he +as fro) !n'ia .asteroften tol' this story, that once he ha' to share a train seat +ith a )an "s he sat 'o+n, he ca)e face=to=face +ith Warner $lan', the actor, +ho 'i' not try to conceal his 'isleasure of sharing his seat an'facing a Hin'u .aster finally so&e to hi), but there +as no resonse .aster sai', 4Can7t you loo&)ore leasantO4 #he actor sai', 4!t7s none of your business4 .aster relie', 4!t is too )y business, for! have to sit facing you an' loo& at that sour face of yours4 #he actor burst out in laughter #his gave.aster the chance he +as loo&ing for to hel hi) He sai', 4!sn7t it true that everyone has so)ecra>iness, those +ho are of the sa)e cra>iness, they are at one +ith each other, but if 'ifferent cra>yeole get together, they fin' out their cra>iness ! &no+ your cra>iness, +hich is that of acting, but

you 'ont &no+ )y cra>iness, +hich is to be cra>y about (o' Aet us )a&e a +ager !t you can rovethat your cra>iness is better than )y cra>iness, ! +ill beco)e an actor, but if ! can rove to you that )ycra>iness is better, then you +ill have to follo+ )e4 .aster en'e' by saying that he +as 4sare' fro)beco)ing a )ovie actor4 .r $lan' follo+e' this ath an' even re'icte' his o+n 'eath

.aster too& so)e of us to Catalina !slan' Dr an' .rs Ae+is +ere +ith us We stee' into arestaurant to eat #he lace +as e)ty, the hostess ?uic&ly ca)e over to say that there +ere no tablesavailable ! never +as so hurt in )y life #o thin& that a Christ ha' stee' into this lace an' +asrefuse' a table .aster, +ithout a +or', turne' an' +ent out ! +ent to the la'y an' gave her a iece of)y )in' an' tol' her that ! suose if Jesus Christ entere' here, he too +oul' be refuse' a table !also tol' her that .aster +as one of !n'ia7s greatest )en an' turne' a+ay $ur blesse' .aster,

+henever he foun' that so)eone +as reu'ice', he +oul' return to that erson again an' again, untilhe ha' +on the) over, an' then he +oul'n7t go again He coul' not see souls )a&e tools ofthe)selves because of 'ifferent countries, religion, etc, for he ha' often sai' that those +ho hate any

158



nation, +ill be born in that country until they learn to love itN an', since all +ere (o'7s chil'ren, hatre'shoul' have no roo) in anyone7s heart or )in'

.*otions

.aster7s heart +as so ten'er, if so)eone 'ie', he crie' 'eely, an' +oul' say, 4Why 'i' the Aor' ta&e

hi) or her a+ay,4 he +as so hu)an Woo'y7s father su''enly asse' a+ay, +hile .aster +as tal&ing tohis +ife on the hone When he ut the hone 'o+n he rofusely crie' Woo'y sai', 4! cant cry,4then ! &ne+ .aster ha' ta&en her sorro+ an' 'i' the crying for her

!n 19K, +hen aasis life +as in 'anger, .aster sat in his roo) )ost of the ti)e, raying nightan' 'ay "fter )onths of an6iety, aasi ca)e to the her)itage .aster gave a +elco)e ho)e 'inner

We +ere all seate' at the table .aster starte' to say ho+ hay he +as that aasi ha' co)e He coul'not finish his sentence for his voice cho&e' +ith e)otion, an' blesse' little .aster trie' to hi'e hiseyes behin' his one ban' When +e sa+ those 'ear tears fall 'o+n his chee&s, +e coul' not hel bute)otionally oin hi), inclu'ing aasi He soon controlle' his e)otions an' began to eat -oonthereafter, he +as his usual conversationalist ! have often seen that blesse' soul give +ay to tears,

though they +ere not e6cessive, but genuinely ten'er He +as hu)an enough to be able to e6ressother e)otions, such as an6iety, +orry over others, an' the organi>ations trials an' tribulations !t +assuch a 'ivine thing to )e to see that such a great Christ=li&e soul as our .aster has hu)an actions an'reactions !t )a'e hi) all the 'earer to )y eyes He +as never over+hel)e' by the), but ha' the) inerfect control an' only gave vent to ust a little an' coul' control the) at a )inutes notice

O* Sound -ro* /is 0eet

When .aster +as a+ay, even if ! +as aslee, ! coul' al+ays tell he +oul' soon arrive, for ! coul' hearthe $) soun' "t first, ! 'i' not connect the $) soun' +ith .aster7s arrival, but ! soon learne' thatafter ! hear' the $), .aster +oul' soon aear either at .t Washington or ncinitas her)itage #hesa)e thing haene' if ! sat ?uietly on the floor at his feet ! coul' hear the $) co)ing fro) his feet

$ne 'ay, after +e ha' )e'itate' +ith .aster, he as&e' each one of us to ut our ear to his hea' Justas lain as if ! hear' it in )y o+n hea' +as the soun' of the bu)blebee astral soun' of the coccygealcenter, .aster sai', 4#his is very unusual, for one can hear ones o+n bu)blebee soun', but neveranyone else7s, all of us hear' the sa)e soun'4

Trees

.aster 'early love' trees an' +oul' not allo+ any of the) to be cut 'o+n !t +as har' even to lettri))ing be 'one, he love' the) so +ell

Lo$alt$

.aster +as the )ost loyal erson ! have ever, an' have yet to )eet His first loyalty +as to (o', ne6tto His .asters, their +or&, then to those +ho loyally serve' hi) an' the +or&, 'irectly or in'irectly,an' to those +ho) he calle' his frien's He +as loyal to the bone to his native !n'ia, his a'ote'country, ")erica, an' to laces an' things that serve' (o'7s urose .aster often use' to tell us, 4!fall the go's are lease', but the (uru is 'islease', his 'isleasure counts, an' if all the go's are'islease', but the (uru is lease', his leasure shall be your raft to His !nfinite shores4 #his too)eans uncon'itional loyalty .aster +as the very ersonification of loyalty

/ealing

.aster believe' that 'octors 'o +on'erful +or& an' +oul' sen' those +ho nee'e' )e'ical attentionto 'octors, or those he felt ha' )ore faith in 'octors than in 'ivine healing He gives his thought inregar' to healing in his lessons $nce he tol' us the story of a )an +ho ca)e to hi) for healing "fter)e'itation on the )ans troubles, .aster tol' the )an that he ha' better get all his teeth ulle', that his

159



+hole )outh an' bo'y +ere infecte' fro) his infecte' teeth #he )an sai' angrily, 4! ca)e here for ahealing an' you tell )e to have all )y teeth ta&en out ! +ill go +here ! can be heale' +ithout such a'rastic )easure4 #he )an +ent to another healer an' very shortly thereafter, .aster hear' that this)an ha' 'ie' of oisoning fro) his infecte' teeth #his is only one e6a)le of .asters ractical an''ivine +ays

!n everything he un'erstoo', in any line He sai' yogis are )ore suscetible to col's because theirconcentration is )ore in the hea' than else+here an' -atan attac&s the yogi in that +ay to sto theyogi fro) )e'itating .aster +as al+ays on the loo&out for a re)e'y to cure the co))on col' He

+oul' first try the re)e'y on hi)self He coul' vivi'ly analy>e its reactions on his o+n bo'y first Weat .t Washington ha' to +ear a )as& +hen +e ha' col's, not to srea' it to others in the house

When .aster ha' a col', those of us +ho serve' hi) all ha' to +ear a )as& He +as subecte' to)any eole +ith col's through his !ntervie+s -o)eti)es he +oul' ta&e it over an' then his col'

+oul' be severe, but it never stoe' hi) fro) +or&ing, for he al+ays loo&e' uon his bo'y as aartfro) hi)self He strictly a'here' to the )e'ical la+s an' never a'vise' others +hat )e'icine to ta&eor not ta&e

Taking Su--ering on /i*sel-

5ro) the year that .aster lan'e' in ")erica as a religious 'elegate in Boston in 192@, he continuously +ent on one lecture tour after another, night after night, 'ay after 'ay, constantly on the go fro) onecity to another, giving lectures an' classes an' !ntervie+s He +or&e' hi)self )ercilessly an' +ithoutresite "ll through these years fro) 192@ to 193K, +hen he stoe' ca)aigning, he tol' us thatDivine .other ha' tol' hi) that she +oul' &ee his bo'y +ell an' strong an' +oul' not allo+ hi) tota&e the 'iseases an' suffering of others on his o+n bo'y But +hen he stoe' his lectures an'classes to re)ain at the hea'?uarters, she er)itte' hi) to ta&e the &ar)a of others on his bo'y "tfirst the suffering +as sas)atic, but as he continue' to heal an' too& )ore an' )ore throughout theyears, his bo'y suffere' so)eti)es )ore intensely than other ti)esN but nevertheless, the suffering

increase' an' too& its rice on that sacre' bo'y, +hich +as offere' on the altar of (o' as a sacrificialla)b He +oul' not of hi)self ta&e any )e'icines or rub salves or eat certain healthful foo', unlessso)eone suggeste' it for hi), or if (o' tol' hi) 'irectly, or in'irectly through others !n fact, he +as)erciless +ith his bo'y, never loo&ing for its co)forts !f so)eone suggeste' so)ething as a re)e'y,he +oul' say, 4!f you thin& so, go ahea' an' 'o it4 He never allo+e' us to co)lain about our bo'ieseither, or even say +e +ere tire' When ! as&e' hi) +hat to say +hen +e +ere tire', he e6laine',4When you a')it you have so)ething, it beco)es so, an' +ea&ens your +illN therefore, it slo+s theflo+ of energy into the bo'y an' consciousness, to say you are in nee' of rest is best for it )eans thatis only te)orary an' a little rest +ill hel, +hile the other saying your tire' is final4 ! re)e)ber +henhe bought the +ishing +ell, he +ent +ith our )en to ic& it u #hey ha' to carry it to the curb to utit in the truc& !t starte' to fall, .aster hel' it u, but as he 'i' so, he stee' off the curb an' severely

sraine' his an&le !t s+elle' i))e'iately He ha' a class that night an' for the ne6t several 'ays #hatnight he 'i' not have to ta&e off his shoe, an' gave his class, but the ne6t night +hen he ca)e to uthis shoe on again, there +as no roo) in the shoe for his s+ollen foot $ne of us suggeste' that he notgive his class He +as unhay that +e +oul' even suggest such a thing ! sa+ hi) force that s+ollenfoot in that shoe He coul' not even lace it While so)eone +as heling hi) to the bac& hall+ay to the'oor of the classroo), he +as thin&ing, 4Ho+ a) ! going to +al& in there +ithout li)ing in front ofall those eoleO4 He sai' he )a'e a sure)e effort an' oene' the 'oor "s he stee' into the'oor+ay, he su''enly felt his foot beco)e nor)al an' +ent into his shoe +ith a thu' an' he +al&e'into the classroo) +ithout a sign of a sraine' foot #hat, he sai', +as a 'irect healing fro) Divine.other He sai' it +as Divine .other7s test to see if he +oul' go on teaching in site of the sore footan' lace' co)lete trust in Her an' +hen she sa+ that he co)letely truste' Her, she co)letely

heale' his foot an' nobo'y &ne+ that he ha' anything +rong +ith his an&le.aster, being a )an of (o', ha' tre)en'ous healing o+ers ! &no+ fro) )y an' nu)erous

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others, +hich +as very evi'ent by the suffering he hi)self en'ure' on his o+n bo'y for our sa&e He'i' not only heal the bo'y of 'isease, but also the )in' of its sychological &nots an' ignorance fro)our souls, accu)ulate' fro) our ast an' resent lives

De)an's for rayers fro) .aster +ere )any=si'e' 5or instance, once a +o)an as&e' hi)saying, 4-+a)i, lease ray that the stoc& goes 'o+n4 .aster ans+ere', 4What about all those eole

+ho are raying for the stoc&s to go u, this is not a legiti)ate rayer ! cannot ray for you4 #hen the +o)an sai', 4#hen ray that ! get out of it so)eho+4 4#hat,4 .aster sai', 4is a legiti)ate rayer4 #hrough his rayers, she 'i' get out of it +ithout thro+ing the rest of the stoc& )ar&et an' the +orl'usi'e='o+n +ith her o+n 'e)an's .aster &et -r (yana)ata alive for t+enty or )ore years by his

Will $nce she fell an' bro&e her finger .aster +ante' her to go to a 'octor for an 6=ray, but sheans+ere', 4*ou are )y only 'octor4 #he ne6t )orning, she tol' us ho+ 'uring the night, she actuallyfelt the finger being ulle' an' set in lace .aster insiste' that she have a 6=ray ta&en for her fa)ily7sbenefit, so they +oul' not have any Co)ebac& #here +as no sign of a brea& !t ha' been a co)letean' instantaneous healing .aster +as al+ays cautious in that resect, because the )e'ical rofession

+oul' li&e nothing better than to get so)ething on a siritual healer #he thousan' an' one results of.aster7s healing o+ers are far too nu)erous to ut 'o+n on aer or even re)e)ber !t is at a ti)e

li&e this that ! +ish ! ha' &et a recor' of the +on'erful healings .aster erfor)e' through (o's all=enco)assing o+er

Regarding %aster1s Lo)e

(o' +as .asters first, secon', an' last love an' his only chil' +as the cause of -5 "n' for the ast,resent, an' future 'isciles, his first thought +as to ta&e the 'isciles as far as they +ante' to go an'so)e further in site of the)selves .asters &in'ness an' ever=rea'y vigilance +as al+ays on the alertto correct an' bring us bac& to our one=ointe'ness to+ar's (o' #he only ti)e he sho+e''isleasure +as +hen +e acte' other than the i'eal he lace' before his inner sight for us $nce +hen! ha' 'one so)ething that 'islease' hi), ! sai', 4-ir, you )ust hate )e for this4 He ans+ere', 4!

'ont hate you, ! hate your actions4 He searate' the action fro) the soul, for he use' to tell us thatour ba' habits are only grafts, that +e grafte' on our erfect bearing tree, an' if +e reeat the actionthe graft ta&es hol' an' bears fruit, but if +e 'on7t let the graft ta&e root, the branch 'ries u an'eventually falls He 'i' not +ant us to reeat our )ista&es #hat is +hy he +as so strict +ith us We

+ho ha' given hi) the rivilege to 'o so With those +ho) he thought coul' not ta&e it, he 'i' notcorrect in the sa)e +ay

Regarding /elping Oters

He use' to say to all in the house, 4When you are all aslee, ! )entally go through each ones roo) an'see ho+ you are subconsciously fairing an' hel you in that +ay ! &no+ each one7s )in' ! feel eachones thoughts an' reactions ! &no+ your )oo's an' the reason for your )oo's -o)e ! can correct,

but there are others +ho +on7t let )e #hose that are +illing, receive it #hose that 'ont, shut )e out #hat is +hy ! can ta&e you only as far as you +ant to go #he +illingness of the soul is +hat )a&es the'ifference *ou )ay thin& you are +illing, but let a little oosition occur an' the +illingness flies outof the )in's +in'o+4 .aster hate' )oo's above all other ba' habits He use' to say, 4When ! seeyou are )a&ing an effort to change an' are re)orseful of your +rong actions an' really feel it in yourhearts, then ! a) re+ar'e'4 ven +hen +e sai' +e +ere sorry, he usually coul' tell if it ca)e fro) theheart or ust fro) the lis !f the latter, he use' to say, 4-o you thin& because you say, ! a) sorry, thatis enough for )y forgiveness %ot soF #he re)orse )ust co)e fro) the heart an' acte' uon, so ! cansee you )ean it an' not ust fro) e)ty +or's #hen ! +ill forgive you, not until then4 But our little.aster forgave even if +e 'i' not 'eserve it, for he +as li&e a living .other When he +as stern an'reasone', he +as li&e a father He +as al+ays the truest of frien's an' the (uru +hen 'ee siritual

correcting an' 'isciline +ere in or'er #he sychological slas he gave us +ere our greatest blessingsHe +as )ore li&e a )other, ever ten'er, an' re+ar'e' us +ith a &in' +or' or raise, still the siritual

161



an' sychological slas +ere our greatest blessings, for they a+o&e in us the +illingness an' the'eter)ination to )en' our +ays, that +e )ay reach our natural inheritance, (o' .aster love' all(o's chil'ren e?ually #hough the e6ression of that love +as e6resse' 'ifferently, because, as heoften sai', 4ach one of you are li&e the fingers of )y han' ach finger has its articular strength toerfor) its in'ivi'ual 'uties, but each finger is e?ually valuable to )a&e the han' +hole4 We +ere li&e

his chil'ren, an' li&e a father or )other, the 'iscilinarian +as constantly vigilant in his gui'ance,guar'ing our behavior an' teaching us !ntuition -o)eti)es he +oul' as& us for a certain article an'call it by a 'ifferent na)e, +hich ha' no bearing to the article, ust to see if +e +oul' intuitively receivehis thought #his +ay he 'eveloe' our !ntuition When +e 'i' not concentrate on +hat +e +ere'oing, he +oul' say, 4!f you ut all your )in' on +hat you are 'oing, it +ill soon be 'one an' it +illta&e less ti)e4 $r, if +e sai', 4! 'ont &no+ ho+ to 'o this, -ir,4 he +oul' ans+er, 4-tart an' ! +ill

+or& through your bo'y an' )in'4 .aster 'i' not ta&e 7no7 for an ans+er if he felt that +e shoul')a&e stronger effort

.aster use' to &ee us so busy all the ti)e, no )atter ho+ )any of us +ere aroun' hi), he)anage' to &ee everyone busy $ne 'ay ! as&e', 4-ir, +hen +ill +e be able to stay still long enoughto enoy (o'O4 He gave no ans+er We no+ &no+ that it +as to create a balance' life

.aster sel'o) ans+ere' our in?uisition about siritual )atters #hey +oul' be ans+ere',ho+ever, +hen he gave his lecture, or he +oul' ans+er the) so +e coul' receive the) intuitively, inor'er to train us to receive +ithout the so&en +or', but fro) +ithin He so)eti)es +oul' ans+er usin a 'rea), or he +oul' test our inner ten'encies through 'rea)s 5or instance, if he +ante' to &no+if one ha' overco)e anger, he +oul' )a&e you 'rea) about anger, +hich +oul' )a&e your inner selfreson' to the 'rea) !f you reson'e' angrily in your 'rea), then you ha'n7t overco)e, but if you'i' not beco)e angry, he &ne+ that you ha' overco)e an' anger +as not resent in yoursubconscious )in', for you +oul' beco)e conscious of your o+n reaction in the 'rea), so that you&ne+ yourself if you ha' overco)e or not

!t +as an' still is a goo' thing that .asters love is uncon'itional, to +ithstan' an' overloo& all

our shortco)ings an' be able to forgive an' forget He +as li&e )other, no )atter +hat the chil' 'i'consciously or subconsciously, the )other corrects an' forgives because she sees that it 'oes not &no+any better an' hoes that the lesson +ill teach it sufficiently so the chil' +on7t reeat the sa)e)ista&es He +ante' this sa)e uncon'itional love fro) us He +ante' our love in site of his'isciline to us, +hether he sho+e' hu)an or 'ivine traits, )ista&es or not, rich or overty, +hetherhe re+ar'e' or correcte' us %ot that he nee'e' our uncon'itional love for his o+n salvation, butbecause he coul' ta&e us further, if love revaile' But +ith aasi, he sho+e' only love +ithoutout+ar' 'isciline aasi receive' his 'isciline in other +ays, for .aster coul' an' +oul' e6ress hislove to aasi .aster has sai' that a .aster usually al+ays brings the sa)e i))e'iate 'isciles +ithhi) +hen he reincarnates to hel the +orl' $nce +hen ! +as telling hi) that ! 'i' not +ant to co)ebac& to this earth again, he loo&e' 'o+n uon )e saying, 4*ou 'on7t +ant to co)e bac& to hel )eO4

What coul' ! say but consentO

.aster bore a 'ee love for Dhiranan'a, a 'iscile he ha' traine' in !n'ia an' brought to thiscountry to hel hi) +ith his -5 +or& in ")erica !n 1920, +hen .aster bought the hea'?uarters, helace' Dhiranan'a in charge of the hea'?uarters !n the su))er of 1929, .aster +as 'eely hurt

+hen Dhiranan'a, +ho) he love' so 'early, turne' fro) love an' struc& out in'een'ently an' finallyleft the religious life to )arry .aster +ent to .e6ico to forget an' +e thought he +oul' never co)ebac&, but the Aor' )en'e' .asters +oun'e' heart #hen he co)ose' the chant, 4.y Aor' ! Will Be

#hine "l+ays4 He ca)e bac& to ta&e ersonal charge of the hea'?uarters, an' he often sai' that theAor' brought hi) bac&, because the Aor' ha' a little boy hi''en in :ansas City in the for) of aasi

Jana&anan'a for hi) to love a )illion ti)es )ore than he coul' love Dhiranan'a $ne +ho never

'isaointe' hi) either in action, 'ee', or thought, one to +ho) he coul' out+ar'ly e6ress his lovean' receive love in return #hough .aster sai' he +oul' never )entally forsa&e Dhiranan'a, ust as Jesus ha' his Ju'as, so .aster ha' t+o, one in Dhiranan'a an' the other in %ero'e, but he sai' his

162



'ose 'isciles )a'e u for all the Ju'ases that the Aor' +oul' sen' to test hi) +ith !t +as such as+eet sight to see the 'ee love that .aster bore for aasi !t +as the s+eetest, )ost ten'er love thatany )other or father coul' ever have for their chil' .aster an' aasi e)brace' an' greete' eachother as if it +as their first )eeting .aster use' to rub aasis chest over the heart When aasi

+oul' 'o so)ething for the cause that lease' .aster, he +oul' rub aasis chest all the faster an' for

long erio's With close' eyes aasi +oul' )elt in his .asters loving caresses #his 'ivine frien'shi +as in its urest for) #hey +al&e' han' in han', tal&ing, laughing, or having siritual 'iscussions

.aster7s sensitive an' loving nature sense' long before +e 'i' if there +as so)ething hysically or)entally 'isturbing us ! as&e' .aster a ?uestion, 4-ir, you tell us that +e )ust hel souls to fin' (o',ho+ 'oes )y gol' leafing hel othersO4 His ans+er +as, 4-ouls +ill be attracte' by its glo+ing beautyli&e a )oth to a fla)e an' +ill +ant to co)e in the church #here they +ill fin' +ithin the +alls ofout+ar' beauty, (o's reigning beauty +ithin -o)e'ay you +ill &no+ +hat ! )ean4 -ince 19K2, !have ha' countless occasions to hear )e)bers say that they +ere 'ra+n by the glo+ an' uni?ueness ofthe church an' coul' not hel but go in, beca)e converts, or so)e +ere heale' of bo'y, )in', an'soul !t goes to rove that one 'oes not have to reach a ser)on or teach 'irectly to hel others achure, unselfish act erfor)e' is &no+n to the (uru an' (o' an' you rea accor'ingly $ur belove'

.aster7s love to e6ress beauty in all he create' +as only to 'ra+ souls into (o's eternal fla)e

! al+ays felt even +hen )y bo'y +as very +eary, +henever ! ca)e near .aster7s resence, ! coul'feel the fatigue leave )y bo'y He al+ays use' to say, 4#hose +ho are aroun' )e can never be sic&,because )y vibrations co)ing fro) (o' +ont let the)4 $f course, in later years +e 'i' suffer )anythings, because our loa' caught u +ith us

! +oul' li&e to ?uote a fe+ of .aster7s e6certs here that he +rote to aasi about hi)self !f you +ill rea' the rest of the e6certs in this file regar'ing his ersonal struggles for the organi>ation as +ellas his o+n suffering, an' above all his +on'erful siritual e6eriences, you +ill fin' the real soulbehin' the out+ar' for)

."* 13, 193 E ! raye' for the 'ying -r a'harani in !n'ia, little resonse ! receive' fro)the 5ather +hen ! raye' for her Who &no+s best about the 'isensation of lives Ho+ever,! a) raying har' -o)e e6act reverberations of her troubles ! got in )y bo'y +henever !raye' Ho+ever, the Divine 'oes +hat is best about one an' +oul' 'o best for her

"lso rea' letter .ay 20 E June 10, 193, for )ore of his sufferings an' +hy

."* 12, 19K1 E ! a) +ith you an' -5 an' ! +ill give )y bloo' for the hainess of you all

JA* 23, 19K2 E With 'eeest love ine6ressible to you, )y 'earest belove' one, the )ostgentle)anly, the greatest loving frien' on earth for +ho) ! can en'ure all the crucifi6ions on

earth such s< l E the 'eath of )y )other, 2 E leaving .aster in !n'ia an' his assingN 3 EDhiranan'a7s betrayal an' .ia)i crucifi6ionN K E %ero'e betrayalN 0 E 5irst lan'sli'e an')aor 'isaster to )y heart7s 'rea), (ol'en Aotus te)le of all religions !)agine you +ereresent in both of )y agonies, (o' &et you there, as none coul' console )e but you .y)ost belove' one +hich ! have +ritten all )y en'earing ter)s for they are futile for nothingcan e6ress +hat ! feel, lease as& )e, test )e if you +ant, there is no sacrifice ! cannotun'ergo if it +oul' hel you, even )y life is at your 'isosal for your salvation

-P#.B 29, 19K3 E !t )a&es )e sa' +hen ! 'on7t see you for long an' foolish fearsinva'e )y heart #hat is the last cor', +hich hol's )e to this earth an' artly to establish His

+or& to hel others

"P!A 22, 19KK E ! 'on7t ray for )yself, for )e to ray +oul' be to 'oubt Divine .other !

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only +ish the reservation of the bo'y to have the oy of )e'itating +ith you, serving -5,an' being +ith a fe+ 'evotees

"(-# 22, 19K0 E ven Jesus ha' his Ju'as, an' )y hu)ble self ha' his Ju'ases inDhiranan'a an' %ero'e ! test each one before ! give )y love, even then -atan tries to

s?uir) in an' gives )e trouble, ! never ha' to test you, fro) the very first our souls clic&e'together in (o'

%$.B 13, 19K0 E ! have follo+e' stric&en souls +hen they go out 'uring finality ofearthly life But your ath is straight an' s)ooth, an' all your 'ifficulties ! shall try to ta&e, for! have to bear )uch yet to ass the final test ! a) fully reare', life an' 'eath are 'rea)s to)e an' ! an' the ternal oyous -irit are one

."CH ;, 19K E ! have given )y bo'y to (o', if bo'y is ill an' (o' tells )e to ta&ehysical ai' ! +ill, if not, ! 'ie in Hi) to live forever

."CH 21, 19K E !t has been a terrible test for )e too, for ! have al+ays felt ! +oul' notli&e to live +ithout you, ! have al+ays +ante' to go before you ! have &ille' *oganan'a longago, ! let (o' gui'e )e an' ! can only tell +hen as&e', if ! force anything fro) the Divine

+oul' not +or& through )e

$C#$B 1, 19K E (o' has given )e )uch resonsibility about you esecially in the lastchater of life

$C#$B 9, 1901 E ! icture' )yself, an' (o' forbi' yourself a+ay fro) this earth, an' +atching +hat -5 Boar' +oul' be 'oing an' ho+ it +oul' be carrying on the +or& of -5! have retty nearly finishe' )y siritual +or&

%$.B ; E %$.B 2;, 1901 E ! a) trying to give art of )y life to rolongyours

%aster1s Su--ering -or Oters

$ne 'ay ! as&e' .aster, 4-ir, ! rea' an article about #herese %e+)ann +herein she too& uon hero+n bo'y the ba' habits of riests, etc -o)e 'ays her breath an' bo'y oo>e' the s)ell of cigarettes)o&e or li?uor, although she ha'n7t ta&en either one of these ite)s Coul' you lease e6lain this to)e4 His ans+er +as, 4#hose +ho hel other souls, 'o not only ta&e others hysical 'iseases but alsota&es on such habits as eating, 'rin&ing, ealousies, anger, gree' an' all other sychological ten'enciesas +ell #hey so)eti)es, the healer, has to act out those articular ten'encies in their o+n bo'ies or

actions4 .aster inti)ate' that each consecutive 'iscile that ca)e to hi) ha' 'ifferent habits an' inor'er to hel hi) or her brea& that habit, he use' hi)self as the shoc& absorber an' too& uon hi)selfthe conse?uences of the actions or 'iseases, etc

ven though he scol'e' us an' sho+e' great anger or an6iety, if +e loo&e' straight into his eyes, +e coul' see a little gli))er of a s)ile in the corner of his eyes "n', if +e +oul' loo& long enoughan' s)ile' even though he +as scol'ing, +e coul' see the corners of his )outh +oul' go u an' hecoul'n7t hel but s)ile, because he never ha' anger insi'e !t +as ust a lay to be able to correct us, orto teach us a lesson He ha' nothing but oy an' bliss insi'e He ha' nothing but our o+n interest atheart an' his greatest interest +as that +e +oul' fin' (o' an' that +e +oul' &ee on the straight an'narro+ ath an' he +oul' al+ays +atch us so carefully, an' than& (o' he 'i' What +oul' +e have

'one or be to'ay if he ha'nt been so atient, so tolerant, an' so forgiving$ur belove' .aster +as so)eti)es critici>e' for so)e of his actions !f only those +ho critici>e'

164



hi) &ne+ that they )ight have been the very ones +hose actions he ha' ta&en uon hi)self .asterha' no ersonal ba' habits !f he 'i' act one out, it +as one of our faults, for +e ha' so )any -uch aChrist=li&e .aster +e ha', that he so love' his siritual chil'ren that he sacrifice' an' crucifie' hisbo'y on the cross of suffering for our sa&e .ay +e ever re)e)ber an' never reeat our sins for loveof hi) +ho love' us so greatly, for our belove' .aster suffere' intensely for our sins of the ast,

resent, an' future ! +ill relate a fe+ instances of those +hose &ar)a he too& !n 1931, so)e +o)an)a'e a nasty re)ar& about the boy .aster ha' as a 'river at that ti)e -he inti)ate' that his 'i)le'face +as the results of venereal 'isease .aster 'efen'e' the boy by saying, 4#hat is not so, to)orro+his face +ill be cleare'4 #he ne6t 'ay, the boys face +as clear of all 'i)les an' traces of the)

.aster too& it all in one sot on his an&le He still ha' it in 190@, then it co)letely 'isaeare'.aster tol' us that one of his earthly sisters +as araly>e' fro) the +aist 'o+n an' +oul' never +al&again While he +as in !n'ia in 1930, the Aor' tol' hi) +hat to 'o to hel his sister .aster tol' herthat if she +ent to a certain lace an' instructe' her thus, 4!f you can, +ith the hel of others, get onyour lifeless legs an' +al& about a )ile to this ilgri)age shrine, your legs +ill be heale'4 -he +ith allthe +ill she coul' )uster, screeching +ith ain at each effort, finally got to the shrine an' her legs +ere)a'e +holeN but, of course, not +ithout a rice that +as ai' by our belove' .aster7s legs He began

to suffer +ith the) in !n'ia an' to the en' of his 'ays, )ore intense at one ti)e than others butnevertheless e6tre)ely ainful He never co)laine', though he felt the ains &eenly He o&inglycalle' his legs ol' tires We 'i' not &no+ +hose &ar)a he ha' ta&en, until one 'ay ! +as alone +ithhi) He +as tal&ing about his earthly sisters suffering +ith her legs ! e6clai)e', 4%o+ ! &no+ for

+ho) you are suffering for +ith your legs !t is your sisters affliction you too&4 He shyly ans+ere',4Well, it hele' her4 .rs .il're' Ae+is ha' a very enlarge' heart an' for years suffere' +ith it !'irectly as&e' hi) if he ha' ta&en .rs Ae+is7 heart con'ition on hi)self, shyly bo+ing his hea' ina')ission

.aster +oul' never tell +hose suffering he too& uon hi)self an' only on these fe+ occasions'i' he a')it +hen ?uestione' that it +as so "n' ! &no+ that each one of his 'isciles ha' a large

share of ba' &ar)a, +hich he lifte' to his o+n shoul'ers Proof of it +as +hen he sai' to us, 4! a)suffering that all of you )ay not suffer4 !f he ha' an intervie+ in the evening or afternoon, even if hesuffere' all through the night an' 'ay, he +oul' get u fro) his be' of thorns, 'ress, an' have us ta&ehi) to the intervie+ roo) before the erson ca)e in When the erson entere', .asters face sho+e'no sign of revious suffering an' he sat for hours tal&ing, laughing, an' heling that soul #he ersonsitting before .aster never susecte' that our blesse' .aster ha' suffere' all night an' 'ay, or thatour .aster7s legs +ere s+ollen t+ice their si>e an' he ha' force' his shoe on to intervie+ hi) or her

-o)eti)es +hen his legs aine' intensely, he +oul' have us lay his !n'ian recor's #hey +ereeither in Bengali or -ans&rit #here +ere several that he esecially li&e' He +oul' have those laye'over an' over again, so)eti)es all night or late into the night "n' each ti)e he see)e' to enoy it)ore than the ti)e before "t 'ifferent +or's of the song, he +oul' )a&e gestures +ith his ar)s as if

offering blosso)s at the Aor'7s 5eet an' his face +oul' light u an' +oul' say +ith oy, 4"hF4 $necoul' see the oy of the Aor'7s contact in his s+eet loving face an' eyes #he suffering +oul' leave hisface an' one coul' not notice any signs of ain When the loa' beca)e too heavy for His sacre' bo'y,Divine .other lifte' the loa' an' .aster +ent to the +eightless astral +orl'

%aster1s .$es

! +oul' li&e to en' )y +riting +ith our belove' (urui7s eyes, for they +ere truly the Win'o+s of hissoul .asters forehea' +as broa' an' +ell=for)e' +ith erfectly arche' bro+s that fra)e' a beautifulnose an' t+o large, 'ar&, lotus, e6ressive eyes that +oul' change e6ression accor'ing to the 'ifferent)oo's or roles that he laye' at any articular ti)eN )ischievous +hen layfulN fire +hen he beca)e

the 'iscilinarianN reason +hen he too& the art of a fatherN ten'erness +hen that of a )otherN sa'nessan' tears +hen sy)atheticN +is'o) +hen he taughtN 'istant +hen his )in' +as beyon' this lanetyes that +oul' )agnetically heal the bo'y of 'isease, the )in' of sychological &nots, the soul of

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ignorance yes that coul' see even +hat our +or's coul' not say yes that +ent beyon' the hysicalan' enetrate' through the in'ivi'uals )in' an' soul to see +hat even +e 'i' not &no+ or see forourselves yes that sar&e' +ith Will +hen he concentrate' for -57s rogress yes that sa+ thebeauty in all nature yes that +ere ever on the alert for souls that (o' +ante' hi) to hel yes that

+ere caable of seeing the 'ar&er si'e of our nature, but refuse' to loo& at the), to only concentrate

on our goo' ?ualities yes of 'eter)ination that coul' overco)e any obstacles yes that sent outfla)es to burn out the 'raught of 'elusion an' 'ryness of the soul "n' above all, eyes that only ha'sight an' love for his only 5ather, .other, Belove' (o'

.nd Duotation

! +ill ?uote an e6cert fro) .aster7s letter to aasi of their life here, as +ell as the great beyon'together

"(-# , 193; E Blesse' Belove' Aittle $ne Ai&e a fire )ist, +e +ill srea' through theheart of life an' 'eath, lightning an' thun'er, 'isaster, health an' all 'ualities, our Cos)ics&in +ill be the s&y an' the shining ores of the stars We +ill +ear the )il&y +ay as a garlan'

an' >oo) through en'lessness +ithout a crash nafrai' of 'ro+ning, 'isease, acci'ent,overty, sic&ness, an' +e +ill +hirl the soul fla)e over ternal $)niresence ever e6an'ingit #hen +e +ill )a&e the soul fla)e a oint of light an' +e +ill ass unseen to the ores ofato)s, earth, ocean, an' trees all +ill be lights tre)bling before our light, all consu)e' in ourlight, srouting in our light, 'ying an' breathing in us, for +e +ill be the bea) of Creationco)ing out of the heart=booth of (o' sho+ing to all, the )otion icture of the Cos)os "s !

+rite ! see all this, all or little )o)entary 'rea) roble)s are alrea'y solve' #his is .aya #he subli)e has to be obtaine' an' the subli)e attitu'e of unchanging consciousness has tobe )aintaine' an' +on in the +hirlool of earthly 'rea) roble)s #he 'rea) +ill be a'rea) to you by tuning in the consciousness +ith Hi) +ho through (o's hel has reali>e'all this as a 'rea) .aster your +ill an' encourageN 'estroy this 'rea) by one blo+ of your

+a&efulness, an' han's of (o' an' the gurus are lifting you to the shere of ternally oyfulshere of 'rea)lessness

+ara*ansa 7ogananda

: "o' to our Guru2i<s B!ni(resent Sel& Sr* Ma Durga

?Sri Durga Mata

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-heet .usic

.A# . !% C-#"-*

Wor's an' .usic by -ri Durga .ata

Babai, co)e to )eF Babai, co)e to )eF.elt #hou )y -ine in #hee ever)oreCo)e to )e, Babai, co)e to )eBabai, co)e to )eFBabai, ohF give )e

#hat )aic sar& fro) #hee ever)oreCo)e to )e, ohF give )e -a)a'hi$hF )elt )e in ecstasy$hF )elt )e in ecstasy

Aahiri .ahsayi, Aahiri .ahsayiF.elt #hou )y Heart in #hee ever)oreAahiri .ahsayi, co)e to )eFAahiri .ahsayi,Co)e to )e, ohF give )e


-ri *u&tes+ari, -ri *u&tes+ariF.elt #hou )y .in' in #hee ever)oreCo)e to )e, -ri *u&tes+ariF-ri *u&tes+ari,Co)e to )e, ohF give )e


(uru'ev, co)e to )eF (uru'ev, co)e to )eF

.elt #hou )y "ll in #hee ever)ore(uru'ev, (uru'ev, co)e to )eF(uru'ev, co)e to )eF(uru'ev, ohF give )e


V V V

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Sri Durga Mata - A Paramhansa Yogananda Trilogy of Divine Love

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