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    The Spooky Shorts is copyrighted

    material I guess...

    All rights reserved.

    Printed in Vancouver Canada.

    Granville Island.

    Emily Carr Institute 2008.

    No part of this book may be used or

    reproduced in any manner whatsoev-

    er without written permission of the

    author. The author however, knows

    that none of this is even necessary as

    no one could possible fnd anything

    of any value within these pages.

    First Edition

    ISBN: 0118-999

    Written and illustrated by

    Shannon Ang

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    A great monster book is often the by-product of

    a dedicated team of individuals working off le-

    gitimate facts based of genuine research to write

    stories which are marvellously enthralling. The

    book which you are currently reading is sadly not

    such a book, in fact it is quite the opposite. The

    Spooky Shorts is a collection of four totally absurd

    short stories and poems backed up by ground-

    less facts and are poorly based upon the eccen-

    tric ramblings of street hobos not even willing

    to disclose their names for fear that this publi-

    cation will somehow bring them shame. What I

    mean is that if your hoping to be marvellously

    enthralled , youre reading the wrong book.

    A terrifyingly truthful forward.

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    Screams of panic cut through the air,

    as the mechanical monstrosities

    march through the square.

    Their silhouettes towering into the night, each

    monolith like face casting

    an eerie green light.

    No one knows how or why

    their numbers had gotten so high,

    for they seemed to have doubled, tripled or even

    quadrupled in a blink of an eye.

    They show no sign of weakness

    but grow stronger with each passing day,

    As they know that the humans

    will just continue to pay.

    Te Day of the Pump

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    The El Gigante is the most enormous living thing

    on earth. It weights slightly more than 457 fully

    grown elephants and is rumoured to have been

    created by ships dumping biohazardous waste over

    the Pacific. It is so big that it has never been fully

    photographed in any sort of respectable publica-

    tion. However, it had been reported that a Miss

    Amy Canton of Burlington, New York was the

    first person to have had taken El Gigantes full

    picture. This picture would have proudl y showed

    off the creatures 500 meter long body as well as

    its uniquely arranged dorsal fins but unfortunately

    that picture was never recovered; as was the body

    of Amy Canton, as well as the cruise ship The

    Discovery and ever yone else on board it.

    20000 onnes under the sea

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    This next one is short, just so you know,

    as I am sure you are anxious

    to get back to your show.

    Created by man to be the perfect machine,

    the perfect entertainment on flickery screens.

    With no imagination left in their heads,

    humanity clutters the streets like the dead.

    And it is there in that mire

    where they push and they shout,

    and continue to stare till their eyes all pop out.

    And then the sightless crowd moaned,

    ...show us all that we desire...

    The box made no replied and nor any attempt

    to explain his strange attire.

    Te Little Black Box

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    There is a reason why mom said no snacking af ter

    9 pm, and that reason is transfats. It is said that

    your average transfat lurker has about 16 mouths

    and smells like a used diaper. They hydrogenate

    when no one is looking, often in hardened veg-

    etable oils, most margarines, commercial baked

    foods, and many f ried foods.

    When inevitably injected into the human diges-

    tive system, they can raise cholesterol in blood-

    streams to dangerous levels. What is even more

    terrifying is that they are now known to be the

    chief culprits responsible for those obscenely

    horrible pot bellies and those especially hideous,

    bye-bye underarms. Ghastl y...

    It lies beneath...

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    This book is dedicated to

    my family and friends.

    Thank you for all your love and

    support.

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    The Spooky Shortschilling tales to tell in the dark

    Written and illustrated by

    Shannon Ang