South Livingston Ave. church of Christ presents our

Open Bible Study Series:

Building Spiritual Homes

Lesson #1 - Love & Discipline in the Home

Love & Discipline In The

Home

Love & Discipline In The

Home

Focus Of Tonight’s Lesson:Focus Of Tonight’s Lesson:Establishing the foundational nature of love &

discipline to building spiritual homes Love will be seen as the beginning essential Character & nature of this love must be biblical Starts from marriage & unconditionally given to

children Discipline of children is necessary part of expressing

proper love Submission to authority learned by this process

Love & Discipline are inter-dependent

LOVE - IntroducedLOVE - Introduced Love is a defining characteristic of God’s nature

1 Jn. 4:7, 8, 16 Repeat: “God is love” God’s love eternal in expression & planning

Love necessary to have fullness of God in us (Eph. 3:14-19)

Pre-eminence of love declared Colossians 3:14 Bond of perfectness 1 Cor 13:1-3, 13 Actions wasted without it

LOVE - Foundational in FamilyLOVE - Foundational in FamilyBegins with love of husband towards his wife

Eph. 5:25fAs Christ loved church & as selfCol. 3:19 Love & be not bitter against themGen. 29:20 Example of Jacob’s love for RachelProv. 5:18f “Be ravished always with her love…”

Wives to love in response to husband’s loveTitus 2:4 Wives taught to love own husbands

Parents lead in love & children respondLk. 15:17f Love seen in return of prodigal sonParental love seen as natural affection in BibleChildren respond with respect & love

LOVE - Defined(1 Corinthians 13:4-7)

LOVE - Defined(1 Corinthians 13:4-7)

Love suffereth long, and is kind; love envieth not; love vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, doth not behave itself rudely, seeketh not its own, is not provoked, taketh no account of evil; rejoiceth not in unrighteousness, but rejoiceth with the truth; beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.

LOVE - DefinedLOVE - DefinedLongsuffering (Eph. 4:1-2) Kindness (Rom. 12:10; 2 Pet. 1:5-7) Not envious (Gal. 5:25 - 6:2) Selfless, not self-centered (Jn. 15:13; Phil. 2:1f) Absent rash anger (Col. 3:8-14; Jas. 1:19-20) Not vengeful (Matt. 5:43-48; Rom. 12:19-21) Associated with truth, not evil (Rom. 12:9; 13:9)

Keeps commands of God (Jn. 14:15, 23; 1 Jn. 5:3) Lasting despite trials (Rom. 8:35)

Absence of Bible Love Breeds Evil: Examination of 2 Timothy 3:1-5

Absence of Bible Love Breeds Evil: Examination of 2 Timothy 3:1-5

Character producing “grievous times”Love present was opposite of Bible love:

“Lovers of Self” (beginning of problem) “Lovers of Money” “No Lovers of Good” “Lovers of Pleasure” rather than loving God

Without discipline to submit to authority Given to violence Given to hedonism Ignorant of & antagonistic to the truth

Bible Love Involves Rebuke & Discipline

(Hebrews 12:4-13)

Bible Love Involves Rebuke & Discipline

(Hebrews 12:4-13)

Hebrews 12:4-13

4Ye have not yet resisted unto blood, striving against sin: 5and ye have forgotten the exhortation which reasoneth with you as with sons, My son, regard not lightly the chastening of the Lord, Nor faint when thou art reproved of him; 6For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, And scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. 7It is for chastening that ye endure; God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is there whom his father chasteneth not? 8But if ye are without chastening, whereof all have been made partakers, then are ye illegitimate ones, and not sons.

Hebrews 12:4-13

4Ye have not yet resisted unto blood, striving against sin: 5and ye have forgotten the exhortation which reasoneth with you as with sons, My son, regard not lightly the chastening of the Lord, Nor faint when thou art reproved of him; 6For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, And scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. 7It is for chastening that ye endure; God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is there whom his father chasteneth not? 8But if ye are without chastening, whereof all have been made partakers, then are ye illegitimate ones, and not sons.

Hebrews 12:4-13

4Ye have not yet resisted unto blood, striving against sin: 5and ye have forgotten the exhortation which reasoneth with you as with sons, My son, regard not lightly the chastening of the Lord, Nor faint when thou art reproved of him; 6For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, And scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. 7It is for chastening that ye endure; God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is there whom his father chasteneth not? 8But if ye are without chastening, whereof all have been made partakers, then are ye illegitimate ones, and not sons.

Hebrews 12:4-13

4Ye have not yet resisted unto blood, striving against sin: 5and ye have forgotten the exhortation which reasoneth with you as with sons, My son, regard not lightly the chastening of the Lord, Nor faint when thou art reproved of him; 6For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, And scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. 7It is for chastening that ye endure; God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is there whom his father chasteneth not? 8But if ye are without chastening, whereof all have been made partakers, then are ye illegitimate ones, and not sons.

Hebrews 12:4-13

4Ye have not yet resisted unto blood, striving against sin: 5and ye have forgotten the exhortation which reasoneth with you as with sons, My son, regard not lightly the chastening of the Lord, Nor faint when thou art reproved of him; 6For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, And scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. 7It is for chastening that ye endure; God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is there whom his father chasteneth not? 8But if ye are without chastening, whereof all have been made partakers, then are ye illegitimate ones, and not sons.

9Furthermore, we had the fathers of our flesh to chasten us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live? 10For they indeed for a few days chastened us as seemed good to them; but he for our profit, that we may be partakers of his holiness. 11All chastening seemeth for the present to be not joyous but grievous; yet afterward it yieldeth peaceable fruit unto them that have been exercised thereby, even the fruit of righteousness. 12Wherefore lift up the hands that hang down, and the palsied knees; 13and make straight paths for your feet, that that which is lame be not turned out of the way, but rather be healed.

9Furthermore, we had the fathers of our flesh to chasten us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live? 10For they indeed for a few days chastened us as seemed good to them; but he for our profit, that we may be partakers of his holiness. 11All chastening seemeth for the present to be not joyous but grievous; yet afterward it yieldeth peaceable fruit unto them that have been exercised thereby, even the fruit of righteousness. 12Wherefore lift up the hands that hang down, and the palsied knees; 13and make straight paths for your feet, that that which is lame be not turned out of the way, but rather be healed.

9Furthermore, we had the fathers of our flesh to chasten us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live? 10For they indeed for a few days chastened us as seemed good to them; but he for our profit, that we may be partakers of his holiness. 11All chastening seemeth for the present to be not joyous but grievous; yet afterward it yieldeth peaceable fruit unto them that have been exercised thereby, even the fruit of righteousness. 12Wherefore lift up the hands that hang down, and the palsied knees; 13and make straight paths for your feet, that that which is lame be not turned out of the way, but rather be healed.

9Furthermore, we had the fathers of our flesh to chasten us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live? 10For they indeed for a few days chastened us as seemed good to them; but he for our profit, that we may be partakers of his holiness. 11All chastening seemeth for the present to be not joyous but grievous; yet afterward it yieldeth peaceable fruit unto them that have been exercised thereby, even the fruit of righteousness. 12Wherefore lift up the hands that hang down, and the palsied knees; 13and make straight paths for your feet, that that which is lame be not turned out of the way, but rather be healed.

9Furthermore, we had the fathers of our flesh to chasten us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live? 10For they indeed for a few days chastened us as seemed good to them; but he for our profit, that we may be partakers of his holiness. 11All chastening seemeth for the present to be not joyous but grievous; yet afterward it yieldeth peaceable fruit unto them that have been exercised thereby, even the fruit of righteousness. 12Wherefore lift up the hands that hang down, and the palsied knees; 13and make straight paths for your feet, that that which is lame be not turned out of the way, but rather be healed.

Proverbs on Discipline of ChildrenProverbs on Discipline of Children

Proverbs contains timeless advice on subject3:11-12 Example of God in discipline13:24 Lack of discipline is unloving19:18 Discipline must be timely22:15 Folly banished by discipline23:13-14 Punishment not deadly - Evil is29:15 Child left to self brings shame29:17 Correction will give you rest

Principles of Proper DisciplinePrinciples of Proper DisciplineEffective discipline must be:

Consistent Timely Intensely unpleasant, but just Based upon principle of right, not selfish interest

or desire for domination Born of love for & betterment of child, not

parental venting of anger (Eph. 6:4)Same principle is true of proper rebuke

seeking to correct evil & wrong

Do We Always Show Our Love The Same

Way In Every Situation?

Do We Always Show Our Love The Same

Way In Every Situation?

Situation of Adultery:

How Is Love Manifested?

NO!

Situation of Husband’s Lying:

How Is Love Manifested?

NO!

Situation of Wife’s Immodesty:

How Is Love Manifested?

NO!

Situation of Selfish Actions:

How Is Love Manifested?

NO!

Situation of Willful Disobedience:

How Is Love Manifested?

NO!

Drug & Alcohol Addicted Parents

How Is Love Manifested?

NO!

In Each Case, Love Requires CorrectionIn Each Case, Love Requires Correction

•Not All Smiles

•May Be Unpleasant

•May Call For Leniency

•Aimed At Lasting Good

Jesus’ Love Seen In...Jesus’ Love Seen In...Cleansing of the temple (Jn. 2:13-17)Exposing the Samaritan woman’s life of adultery, but

teaching truth (Jn. 4:16-18)Rebuking the Pharisees & Sadducees as they came to

Him (Matt. 3:7-10)Look at & talk to Peter (Lk. 22:61; Jn. 21)Denouncing their traditions (Matt. 15:1-20)Compassion to leaderless sheep (Matt 9:36)Giving Himself on cross (Rom. 5:8)

All Actions Were Harmonious with

Jesus’ Perfect Example of Love

All Actions Were Harmonious with

Jesus’ Perfect Example of Love

Decrease Have To - Increase Want ToDecrease Have To - Increase Want To

Principle seen in Psalm 32:8-11 Constraint necessary to cause obedience at times Obedience through constraint is not the ideal Ideal is listening to counsel because of love

Principle seen in other passages Rom 11:22 Behold God’s goodness & severity 1 Jn. 4:17fPerfect love casts out fear

Aim of child-rearing should be the same

Constraint Desire to Obey

Love NeverTolerates

Evil & Wrong

Love AlwaysManifests

Confidence InOne To Change

Varying RolesVarying Rolesin the Homein the Home

Next Week’s Lesson