Understanding Self-Esteem

February 6, 2014Kent Gomez, M.S.

And How To Keep It High

Video: Wear Sunscreen

Write down 3 things that you’ve got from this clip.

What stood out to you?

What images caught your eye?

What messages from the piece caught your attention?

In one sentence, how would you summarize this video clip?

What is Self-Esteem?

A person’s overall evaluation or appraisal of his or her own worth.

Your CORE BELIEF about yourself.

Our core beliefs--true or false, real or imagined--

form the inner compass that guides our choices.

At the heart of our core beliefs is the statement “I AM ____”.

How we complete that sentence has a profound effect on the quality of our lives.

Video: Dead Poet’s Society

How much do you think Todd believes in himself?

How strong do you think Todd’s self-esteem is (1-10)? How can you tell?

How successful do you think Todd will be in life if he doesn’t increase his self-esteem?

Where does Self-Esteem come from?

It is largely developed during childhood.

Based on our successes and failures, how are we treated by immediate family members, teachers, coaches, peers, etc.

Yes’s and No’s by age 2.

Healthy vs. Low Self-Esteem

Healthy self-esteem

Being praised to

Being listened to

Being spoken to respectfully

Getting attention and hugs

Experiencing success in sports or school

Having trustworthy friends

Low Self-esteem

Being harshly criticized

Being yelled at

Being ignored, ridiculed, or teased

Being expected to be “perfect” all the time

Experiencing failures in sports or school

Self-Esteem Wreckers!Overgeneralization

All-or-Nothing thinking

Filtering

Mind Reading

Should Statements

Negative Comparison

Self-Blame

Labeling Cognitive Distortions

Self-Esteem Wreckers

Each group is responsible in teaching the class their assigned self-esteem wrecker.

As a group, your tasks include:

Define the term in your own words.

Create a short skit illustrating your assigned self-esteem wrecker.

Provide solutions to work with the self-esteem wrecker

As a group, assign roles to everyone:

Notetaker, spokesperson(s), stage players

Group Activity

Video: Dead Poet’s Society

How would you rate Todd’s self-esteem now? How can you tell?

Is it possible to raise your self-esteem?

Absolutely! Self-esteem is a learned behavior.

I Am What I Say I Am,

You Are What You Say Are.

Class Activity

Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission.

~ Eleanor Roosevelt

Three Steps to Better Self-Esteem

Rebut the Inner Critic.

Practice Self-Nurturing

Practice Basic Self-Care (Stress Management)Plan Fun and Relaxing Things (Time Management)Reward yourself for your accomplishmentsRemind yourself of your strengths and achievementsForgive yourself when you don’t do all you’d hoped

Get Help from Others.

The Three-Column MethodIrrational Thoughts Cognitive Distortion Rational Response

I’m so dumb because I wrote the wrong answer on the board. Now everybody can see that I’m an airhead.

I got a “D” on my quiz, now I’m never going to pass this class. Teacher should’ve given me extra time to study. He’s stupid!

If she turns me down, then I’m a loser forever!

Cognitive-Behavior Therapy Tool from “Feeling Good”

LabelingMind ReadingFiltering

All-or-Nothing ThinkingShould StatementLabeling

OvergeneralizationLabeling

Matthew McKay, Ph.D.Patrick Fanning

David D. Burns, M.D.

Journal Entry # 2DUE: February 14, 2013• Page 33 on the On Course Study Skills Plus 2nd Ed.

• Please do items 1, 2, and 3.

• If you are using a different version, look for the journal

entry where you explore your strength and weaknesses

and the reputation you have with yourself. It should be

towards the very end of Chapter 1.