Joseph G. Scott, MASVP – Scott & Associates, Inc.

Selling = Dating The Rules are the Same

Learning to Sell/Date

• $15.5 Billion spent/yr. on Sales Training• $932 Million spent/yr. Dating Services• We’re better at Dating than Selling• Let’s apply our Dating Skills to Selling

Why is it so hard to Sell/Date?

• “It’s not the Selling that’s difficult – It’s finding the ones who want to Buy”

Source: Dan Scott – 1994 – Age: 8 years

• “It’s not the Dating that’s difficult – It’s finding the ones who want to Go Out”

Source: Joe Scott – 2013 – Age: 58 years

My Dating Site/LinkedIn Profile

Bad/Inappropriate Sales Training?

• I was taught (in the 70’s) smart answers to stupid questions, for example:

• If the objection was, “It’s too expensive!”• I was taught to say, “If it wasn’t too expensive,

then in your opinion do you feel that you would buy it”

• What a bunch of ****!

Bad/Inappropriate Sales Training?

• I learned (the hard way) that it was all about the client, their problems and opportunities

• The first computer that I sold: It took my client 3 weeks to get their invoices out, which cost them $ 70,000/year

• The computer would do that in one day – He wrote a check on-the-spot.

Selling/Dating CycleProspecting = “Cruising”

Targeted Prospecting = Looking for Love in All the Right PlacesQualifying = Can/Will They?

Appointment(s) = Date(s)Proposal = Proposal

Close = An Exchange of Some SortRepeat Business = Budding Relationship

Increased Business = “Benefits”Referral = Blind Date

Long-Term Relationship = MarriageLose the Account = Divorce

Large Low/No-Margin Client = Fatal Attraction

Prospecting = ”Cruising”

• Can be random• Quality may be suspect• Low ROI• Lots of rejection• Transaction-oriented (One-night Stand)• Rarely turns into a long-term relationship

Targeted Prospecting = Looking for Love in All the Right Places

• A large building changed hands• I studied their web site and found that Friday

was “Take your dog to work” day• I called the Marketing Department

receptionist and said, “I have to work with you guys – you must be fun people!”

• I brought our Schnauzer to the appointment

Learning to Sell/Date

• If you begin a relationship thinking only of What’s In It For Me? – you’ll probably fail

• If you begin a relationship thinking only of What Can I Do For You? – that’s the key

• The second approach is, at first, very difficult – especially when you are new to selling and have to pay your mortgage!

• “Desperation in the Singles Bars”Source: The Eagles - Shoes

Qualifying: Can/Will They?

• At a Chamber of Commerce meeting, I sat next to a business owner whom I didn’t know.

• He turned to the person to his left and asked, “What Do You Do For A Living?”

• The answer was, “I sell Ad Specialties.”• The business person said, “Please pass the

butter.”NO DATE FOR YOU!

Qualifying = Can/Will They?

• Him: “Joe, WDYDFAL?”• Me: “I help my clients attract and retain

customers and employees.” (Pick-up Line!)• Him: “How do you do that?”• Me: “Tell me about (yourself) a challenge or

opportunity that you face with either customers or employees and I’ll give you some examples.”

NOW WE’RE ON A MAN-DATE!

Appointment(s) = Date(s)

• When you get past the WDYDFAL phase and get together – your place (office) or mine (office) or neutral territory

Proposal = Proposal

• When you determine what is important to them (what they want, where does it hurt, what drives you nuts), present it in detail and get acceptance.

Close = An Exchange

• I gave the business owner some examples and the subject changed to hobbies and interests. He told me that his son wanted to buy a drum set. I offered to take him and his son to my favorite music store and help select his instrument, which I did.

• The first “exchange” of our relationship was personal and I helped him by using my “network”. Adding value…

Example: How does this work?

• Later, I gave him a call to see how his son was doing – the son was driving him nuts because he was playing all the time –which was great!

• He then asked me to put together a proposal to help him promote a new product at a trade show.

• I suggested that we have a preliminary discussion over a “four-hour real estate inspection” (golf)

• For me, golf helps determine what someone is REALLY like (temperament, honesty, humor)

Repeat Business = Relationship

• Was it good for you?• Let’s do it again!

Increased Business = Deepening

• You can date other people – And It’s OK, just make sure that you don’t talk about “the others” unless you are asked

Referral = A Blind Date

• I know this really nice guy/gal..• You’d be so GREAT together!• You’d make a CUTE couple!

Long-term Relationship = Marriage

• You know you can “count on the orders”• You are getting internal and external referrals• Celebrate your anniversaries!

DO NOT TAKE IT FOR GRANTED!

Lose The Account = Divorce

• Most relationships end, and customers leave, due to a lack of interest and attention

• Hopefully, you can “still be friends”

Large, Low-Margin Client =Fatal Attraction

• Don’t be seduced by “The Big One”• The feelings = intense• The courtship = long• The relationship = too long• Your “return” = low• The “maintenance” level = high• The cost to you = high• You will lose other, more satisfying relationships

Prologue = Lessons Learned

“People buy from people they like, AND”It’s fairly easy to get someone to like you –

and “Like” can be superficial

“Continue to buy from those they trust”It is not easy to get someone to trust you

And trust can be lost very quickly

Men Selling to Women

• Please excuse the generalities:• Similar to being on Oprah – more of a personal

interview (these are questions that I have been asked): What is your wife’s name? How did you meet? How long did you date before you got engaged? When did you know that she was “the one”? Do you have any children? What do you do for your anniversaries? Do you like to cook? What is your favorite kind of food? Any pets?

Women Selling to Men

• Please excuse the generalities (again):• Similar to being on Letterman – more of a

“Stuff and Things” interview (these are questions that have been asked of female sales reps that I know): Do you play golf? What kind of car do you drive? Where do you go on vacation? Are you married? How about lunch/dinner?

• It takes much more skill to navigate here!

Opposites = Attraction?

• No, Shared Values Do• Opposites, Diversity of Thought & Opinions

are the “Traction” in Attraction• The “Attractants” will not be the reason you

are together in the long-term – They will change over time, and will become less significant or meaningless

Complications!

• What do you do when a client or potential client is attracted to you in a way that makes you uncomfortable?

• Don’t visit in person or phone for a while – e-mail is a perfectly acceptable means of doing business in our industry – Plus, if anything untoward occurs via e-mail you have a written record