“WE DON’T SEE THINGS AS THEY ARE, WE SEE THEM AS WE ARE”

Self-Identity Crises in a Social Society

The Importance of Self-Identity

Becoming a unique, self-respected individual is critical in healthy psychological development. Having a positive self-identity or “self-image” is important in recognizing who you are as an individual and how you will react to all types of situations.

“Self-Image” is constantly linked to body image, and although confidence in the way you look is extremely important, it is only a small part of a much larger picture.

Your self-identity can easily be that of how others see you (which makes self-esteem much easier to achieve) or it can be completely different to how others perceive you (which may make you feel misunderstood or left out).

Self-Identity vs. Self-Esteem

Self-identity is recognizing one’s own potential and qualities as an individual

Self-esteem is having confidence in one’s own worth or abilities (it is defined as having self respect)

Self-Identity Crisis

According to Erik Erikson, a developmental psychologist (from the 1950s), tweens/teens must work through two life “crises” in order to confidently determine their personal identity and advance future development (Oswalt, 2010).

When these “crises” are unsuccessfully dealt with, psychological damage is often times a negative side effect.

Unfortunately in today’s society we are seeing many more challenges affecting the healthy development of self-identity.

An Interacting Society

Symbolic Interactionism;

“Focuses on small scale perspectives of interaction between individuals”

“Explains an individual in a society and their interaction with others”

“People change based on their interaction with objects, events, other people and assign meanings to things in order to decide how to act”

Identity vs. Identity Confusion

Erik Erikson’s first “crisis” is “Identity vs. Identity Confusion”. This crisis represents the struggle to find a sense of true, unique individual identity while still being accepted and “fitting in”.

It is commonly experienced by adolescences as they try to determine who they want to be as an individual and how they want others to perceive them.

It is important for tweens/teens to advance through this successfully in order to gain a clear understanding of their self and future development of self-esteem.

Identity vs. Identity Confusion

If this stage is not advanced through successfully, an individual can become socially disconnected, or become a bit “big-headed”

Bullying is a common complication that interferes with this stage of self-identity. It is too often seen that in order to gain recognition from their peers, kids will have a blurred idea of how they view themselves and how they want others to view them. Youth will often times change their opinion or view on something in order to fit in with their classmates.

Relating back to symbolic interactionism, the problem arises when an individual’s perception of their self changes or they assign different meanings to personal opinions in order to relate and decide how they “should” react.

A Cruel, Cruel World

At least 1 in 3 adolescent students have reported being bullied recently (CIHR, 2012).

Bullying has been linked with mental health in numerous research cases. People who are bullied report to feel more lonely with less interest in social interaction.

Cyber-bullying is the main form of bullying in today’s society and it has increased the number of occurrences.

We know that bullying is drastically hindering Erikson’s first crisis due its influence on one’s perspective. The solution is to keep working on the anti-bullying movement. It is important for teachers, support systems and parents to be involved in educating children that everyone is unique in their own way and that it is ok if someone is not exactly like them.

Intimacy vs. Isolation

Erikson’s second “crisis” is “Intimacy vs. Isolation”. This stage is when an individual achieves an understanding of the idea of giving love and support and receiving it.

It is important for youth to develop and maintain close friendships outside of their families. It is also important for them to gain knowledge on how a romantic relationship works (including the benefits of reciprocity)

Successful completion of this stage leads to an individual being able to form honest, healthy relationships and bond with others to achieve common goals.

Intimacy vs. Isolation

This stage can be directly influenced by an unhealthy relationship with family members. Healthy, trusting, close knit relationships with family members are the foundations that lasting relationships are built on. When someone is raised in an untrusting environment where they feel alone or neglected they will begin to associate all relationships as being this way and therefore will have a negative association to what a relationship really is.

According to Erikson, it is likely that these people will unfortunately become needy, dependent and vulnerable. Emotional development is stalled and healthy relationships are not formed.

Simply put, if one cannot find intimacy they cannot find a true self-identity or self-image due to lack of confidence and support. They may even begin thinking they are the problem.

Family Dynamics

A gap is a term used in psychology to explain a lack of preference or ideology one has about a behavior or an opinion that they personally have.

A gap is far from the “well defined preference” (where an individual should be) in order to confidently and successfully build personal opinions and realizations.

When someone is raised in a family dynamic that does not have ideal interaction (for example not openly communicating or is untrustworthy) a person has to work extra hard to make lasting relationships and are often times not able to hear or say the word no.

This is a problem because as unique individuals we should be able to form our own opinions and be able to stand up for what we believe we deserve in a relationship; without that ability one may find their self in unhealthy relationships which undoubtedly influences their ability to recognize their own self potential and qualities, (self-identity) leading to a decreased self-worth (self-esteem).

The importance of a close, well defined relationship with family cannot be understated. As a busy, hectic society we must remember to make time for the things that matter most, and building strong, healthy relationships between parents and children is certainly the best way to progress through this stage.

All in All

All the stages of self identity, according to Erik Erikson, are imperative to the healthy development of self-identity. But the two most important stages (Self identity vs. Self Confusion and Intimacy vs. Isolation) are directly based on the interactions we have with other people. If negative experiences occur during adolescence in regards to social interaction, then a blurred self-identity onsets.

It is important we continue to improve our interactions between each other as a society to help everyone benefit from individualism and self-esteem

References

Canadian Bullying Statistics. (2012, September 28). Retrieved March 31, 2016, from http://www.cihr-irsc.gc.ca/e/45838.html

Crossman, A. (2015, June 14). What Is Symbolic Interaction Theory? Retrieved March 31, 2016, from http://sociology.about.com/od/Sociological-Theory/a/Symbolic- Interaction- Theory.htm

Dombeck, M., PH.D. (2006, July 3). Self Identity Problems. Retrieved March 30, 2016, from https://www.mentalhelp.net/articles/self-identity-problems/

Dombeck, M., Ph.D. (2014). The Long Term Effects of Bullying. Retrieved April 01, 2016, from http://www.aaets.org/article204.htm

Oswalt, A., MSW. (2010, November 17). Erik Erikson And Self-Identity. Retrieved March 29, 2016, from https://www.mentalhelp.net/articles/erik-erikson-and-self-identity/

Whitbourne, S. K., Ph.D. (2012, March 3). Are You Having an Identity Crisis? Retrieved April 01, 2016, from https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201203/are-you-having-identity-crisis