Saint Agnes...live, reacting audience. Even pop sitcoms need canned laughter or fake applause...
Transcript of Saint Agnes...live, reacting audience. Even pop sitcoms need canned laughter or fake applause...
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Saint Agnes Catholic Church Arlington, Virginia
“Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.”
T h i r d S u n d a y o f E a s t e r
P a r i s h I n f o r m a t i o n
Parish Clergy Pastor: Rev. Frederick H. Edlefsen
Parochial Vicar: Rev. Scott Sina
In residence: Rev. Cedric M. Wilson, O.S.A.
In residence: Rev. Thomas Nguyen
Parish Office 1910 N. Randolph Street • Arlington, VA 22207-3046
Office Hours: M-F 8:00 am – 4:00 pm
Phone: 703-525-1166 • Fax: 703-243-2840
Website: www.saintagnes.org
Parish Office Personnel
Inquiries: [email protected]
Business Manager: Meg McKnight ([email protected])
Director of Development, Outreach, and Communications:
Amber Roseboom ([email protected])
Facilities Manager: Katie Howell ([email protected])
Program Coordinator, Protection of Children:
Joan Biehler ([email protected])
Coordinator of Adoration, Security & Logistics:
Michael Sirotniak ([email protected])
Accounting: Lucy Estrada ([email protected])
Administrative Assistant: Ligia Santos ([email protected])
Ministry Assistant: Nicole Filipowski ([email protected])
Religious Education Office Director (DRE): Bernadette Michael ([email protected])
Administrative Assistant: Marie Macnamara ([email protected])
Phone: 703-527-1129
Youth and Young Adult Ministry Coordinator: ([email protected])
Liturgical Music Director of Music: Laura Cooman ([email protected])
Director, Saint Agnes Ensemble: Richard Lolich
School 2024 N. Randolph Street • Arlington, VA 22207-3031
Phone: 703-527-5423 • Fax 703-525-4689
Principal: Jennifer Kuzdzal ([email protected])
Assistant Principal: Ann Reid ([email protected])
Liturgy at Saint Agnes
Sunday Mass Saturday: 5:00 pm (Vigil)
Sunday: 7:30 am, 9:00 am, 10:30 am (High Mass), 12:00 pm
Holy Days As announced
Weekday Mass Monday – Friday: 6:30 am, 9:00 am (Rosary after 9:00 am Mass)
Saturday: 7:30 am, 9:00 am (Rosary after 9:00 am Mass)
Monday: 7:00 pm (in Spanish)
Sacrament of Penance
Saturday: 8:00 am-9:00 am; 3:00 pm–4:00 pm or by appointment
This Week’s Mass Intentions
May Third Week of Easter
M 6 Monday of the Third Week of Easter
6:30 am Sr. Mary Margaret Ann Schlachter, S.N.D. (Fr. Edlefsen)
9:00 am Douglas Williams (Thompson Family)
T 7 Tuesday of the Third Week of Easter
6:30 am Michael Reborchick (Reborchick Family)
9:00 am Mr. & Mrs. Otto Bang (Gorman Family)
W 8 Wednesday of the Third Week of Easter
6:30 am Ellena Mora Villegas (Carmen Guardia)
9:00 am Richard Teske (Judi Teske)
Th 9 Thursday of the Third Week of Easter
6:30 am Michael & Florence Gatti (Ford Family)
9:00 am Elizabeth McCausland (Ann McCausland)
F 10 Friday of the Third Week of Easter
6:30 am Patrick Donahue (Fr. Edlefsen)
9:00 am Richard O’Keeffe (Mary O’Keeffe)
Sa 11 Saturday of the Third Week of Easter
7:30 am Mary Pam (Lorna Stockmeyer)
9:00 am Maria Martins (Diamantina Pinto)
Vigil Fourth Sunday of Easter
5:00 pm Frank & Zoe Green (Zimmerman Family)
Su 12 Fourth Sunday of Easter
7:30 am Pastor’s Intention: For All Mothers
9:00 am Pastor’s Intention: For All Mothers
10:30 am Pastor’s Intention: For All Parishioners
12:00 pm Pastor’s Intention: For All Mothers indicates person is deceased
Sunday Mass Readings:
Third Sunday of Easter ACTS 5:27-32, 40B-41; PS 30:2, 4, 11-12, 13;
REV 5:11-14; JN 21:1-19
Popeyes and Port Comedy From a Fallen World
Pastor’s Column — Rev. Frederick Edlefsen
My sister was a child and I a teenager when we
went with mom, dad and my grandmother (on
dad’s side) to the zoo in Columbus, Ohio. I recall
little of the outing, save for laughing at the
monkeys and what happened next. We wandered
into a cyclorama of venomous snakes. It was a dark
theatre, in the round, with glassed-in displays of
vipers slithering in replicas of native habitats.
BANG!-G-g-g-g-g-gggg. My sister’s balloon
popped. It echoed. The crowd hushed. Then, dad
made an announcement: “The snakes are out! The
snakes are out!”
Well, I thought it was funny. Dad’s quip was
intuitive. Subliminal spontaneity. But I experience
less spontaneity nowadays. Things seem more
guarded and cliché. I asked some college students
about the funniest thing they’d ever seen. They all
described TV comedians. I replied that TV comedy
is more contrived and tends toward a mockery.
Then I asked about uncalculated, real-life, belly-
laughing humor. They didn’t say much.
Nonetheless, it was notable that no one mentioned
humor on social media. That got me thinking.
Some TV comedians were indeed funny. And most
TV comedians (that I’ve seen) were actually filmed
live. Performed comedy rarely works without a
live, reacting audience. Even pop sitcoms need
canned laughter or fake applause (notwithstanding
some of the rare “higher” forms of TV comedy). In
any event, TV comedy is a matter of putting old
content – like a live Vaudeville act – into a new
medium. I recall, in the ‘70s, when Tim Conway
and Carol Burnett would adlib or go off-script in
what was otherwise a rehearsed skit on The Carol
Burnett Show. Those were their funniest acts. Watch
a 1978 skit called “Tim’s Surprise.” That kind of
comedy didn’t grow up in an electronic medium.
It grew up in a world of live acting that
impersonated real life experiences. (Ironically, the
aforementioned skit is on YouTube – a case of old
content in a new medium and then in a newer
medium). But here’s something particular to TV
humor: it rarely goes beyond the critical, that is,
making someone’s fault the object. That’s not intrinsic
to humor, but it looms large in TV comedy. The
common ingredient in all humor is irony. Not all
forms of irony work in every form of medium, save
for live acts with solely live audiences. Secondary
media – that is media removed from immediate
experience (electronics) – narrow the possibilities
of which kind of ironies can be played out in
humor.
“The snakes are out!” was funny in real life. It’s a
case of, “You had to be there.” It would only be
funny on TV if the snakes really did get out. Or, if
the guy who said it got arrested. Neither of which
would be funny in real life. “All media work us
over completely,” said Marshall McLuhan.
Electronics make us want unresolved involvement.
Insults, even comedic insults, are all about that. But
“high” humor – which brings joy from irony – is
not a content sustained on either TV or social
media. The best that TV can do for joy is to be
hyper-sentimental, like a Hallmark holiday special.
Otherwise, it’s rare. Electronics don’t know what to
do with either irony or joy, other than overdoing
the bitter or the sentimental. There’s no substitute
for real life experience if one wants to feel the joy of
humor.
A common cultural sense of a fallen world creates
the irony from which we get humor and, thereby,
comedy. That’s why American comedy, like
psychology, is largely a Jewish thing. Comedians
are intuitive psychologists. Read the Old
Testament. You’ll find a cultural ground of
experience from which came the great comedians
who got their start in Catskill resorts, back in the
day. They were hilarious. They were often critical,
but not necessarily so. More often, they were
lamenting, another expression of irony that can be
funny. I recall once reading Psalm 78 and
laughing. Read it in light of The Exodus: it’s chock-
full of irony and comedic potential. Irony is the
raw material from which humor is refined and
thereby baked into comedy. So now, I offer you
some real-life, irony-rich stories that created a
culture of humor among those who’ve experienced
them. These tales reveal a cultural basis of a non-
critical humor, in a Catholic setting. Like our Jewish
forbears, the main character suffered and felt the
ironies of a fallen world. Meet my great-
grandmother, from New Orleans.
Her name was Ida Ragan Prados, whom we called
Momee. Pronounced Mum-mee. Her husband
Rufus died from a heart attack. The stress from his
failing car business, during the Great Depression,
got the better of him. After his death, Momee had
several suitors, though she never re-married. She
once dated a guy who ran a monkey farm and
gave her a baby monkey. When taking her kids on
a car ride to somewhere, Momee had her youngest,
Rufus, Jr., hold it in the back seat. It bit him. He
screamed. It screeched and ran around the car.
Momee crashed into the guardrail of a bridge over
a canal in Metairie. Her youngest daughter,
Amelie, now known as “Aunt Puffy” (age 99 now),
laughingly tells the rest. (“Puffy” is an extraction
from the French “poupée,” which means “little
doll”). Momee called the police from a pay phone
and a cop answered. She told him in a panic, “The
monkey bit Rufus and I wrecked the car!!!” Momee
– and Amelie, who was with her – overheard the
cop through the phone’s receiver, yelling to his
colleague. In Aunt Puffy’s telling, he said
something like, “Hey, get ova’ hea’. Ya’ gotta’ hea’
dis!” Speaking into the receiver, he said, “Say dat
again, ma’am.” “The monkey bit Rufus and I
crashed the car in the bridge!!!!”
Momee loved to entertain. Two years later, when
Third Sunday of Easter
Pastor’s Column
Continued
my mom-to-be, Ida Celine, was fourteen, Momee
took her and two other granddaughters to the
Court of Two Sisters, a restaurant on Royal Street
in the French Quarter. She bought them crème-de-
menthe Grasshoppers and taught them how to
smoke cigarettes, insisting that women don’t
inhale. (Grandmas: try that today). Nothing
Momee did was conventional (except for not
inhaling), which is why conventions are important.
Without them, nothing would be either ironical or
funny. To be sure, Momee broke conventions, not
morals. Her life was one irony after another in a
conventional world. And from that flowed lots of
laughter in tales told to this day. From the ’50s
until her death in the late ‘80s, Momee infallibly
kept a water-pitcher full of gin in the fridge, ready
to mix martinis or gin-and-tonics, along with a tray
of Oysters Rockefeller. On a table away from – but
visible from – the dining room, she had a big glass
jar full of M&Ms, peppermints and butter mints.
That was lunch for the kids. It kept them away
from the adults but firmly positioned in a safe
space. If parents objected, which they did, Momee
would say, “It won’t hurt them.” They’re baptized.
The gin pitcher is still a family legend. Trips in and
out of Moisant International Airport often entailed
a martini layover with Momee. During these first
class visits, tunes like Artie Shaw’s band playing
“All the Things You Are,” or June Christy and
Benny Goodman performing “Taking a Chance of
Love,” or Nat King Cole singing “Nature Boy,”
pervaded the background from the radio. In 1960,
when dad flew in from Newark for his wedding,
he made the customary stopover at Momee’s,
which was graciously hosted with Aunt Puffy.
When Momee offered him a drink, Puffy shouted
to her mother, “Don’t forget the Holy Wata’s in the
gin bottle. That’s not for drinks.” At age 99, Puffy
still tells the tale with tearful, red-faced laughter:
“Ya shoulda’ seen the look on ya’ daddy face!” Of
course, he was a Presbyterian from Jersey. If Holy
Water occupied the gin bottle, gin occupied the
water pitcher. My Uncle Chuck, a college student
in the ’60s, found this out when he stayed a hot
summer’s night at Momee’s to go out with friends
in the City. Returning to Momee’s in the warm wee
hours, cotton mouthed from beer, he went to her
fridge to pour himself a nice, tall, cold glass of
water…
My last memory of Momee is from the winter of
1987. As was custom, it followed upon a Piedmont
Airlines landing at Moisant, a Christmas return
from grad school. In her declining years,
Momee’s gourmet palate took to Popeye’s fried
chicken paired with port. I owe Providence a
debt of gratitude for having had such a great-
grandmother. Aunt Puffy said this of her mother,
with an affection that only a New Orleanean could
feel: “She neva’ grew up.” From the trials of
childhood, an early proposal to marriage (she was
proposed to at age twelve and married at sixteen),
an early adolescence spent in a convent (her mom
put her in the Ursuline Academy until she was old
enough to marry Rufus), and the tragic death of
her beloved husband, she became childishly holy.
Everyone has a common testimony about her: She
never had a bad word about anyone. She was all
cheer, about everything and everyone, even people
who took advantage of her. She was hopelessly
naïve. In her mind, people were not capable of
malice, except the Soviets. She thought that
because she, herself, wasn’t capable of malice. It’s
said that when the ladies gossiped at bridge games,
she’d say, “You don’t know the whole story,”
throwing cold water on hot words and another
card on the table, taking another sip of her martini
and another drag of her cigarette (but not
inhaling).
En route back to UVA that January, we dined for
the last time on Popeyes and port. In the damp cool
winds of a New Orleans winter, she entered a
nursing home. She wheelchaired around telling
everyone how wonderful they were. She never
grew up. But grace weaves itself into the intricate
contours of real life in fallen world. From that, we
get humor. And laughter. Thank you, Momee. And
thanks for the suffering, faith and humor you
passed to your family. It was light in a fallen
world. And humor that pointed to heaven. The
Lord is Risen!
Pancake Breakfast Sunday, May 5, 2019
St. Agnes Parish Hall
Support the St. Agnes Youth Mission to WorkCamp
Pancakes, sausage, coffee and juice will be served in the Parish Hall
following the 9:00 am and 10:30 am Masses on Sunday, May 5. All proceeds
will help pay for St. Agnes high-schoolers to attend WorkCamp 2019 this June.
$5 per person or $20 per family Donations gratefully accepted.
For more information, contact Anne Ray at [email protected].
Scouts & Seniors, Spaghetti & Stories Saturday, May 11, 2019 | 6:00 pm | St. Agnes Parish Hall
Boy Scout Troop 111 invites senior citizens of the parish to share some wisdom and stories of their lives with them over a free spaghetti dinner in the Parish Hall. The menu includes spaghetti with meat sauce and a veggie option, salad, bread, and dessert. Water, seltzer, lemonade and coffee will also be available. There is no cost to attend.
Please RSVP by Thursday, May 9, to Mark Allen at [email protected] or 202-316-0636.
Baby Bottle Drive for HOPE in NOVA
Step 1: Take a bottle.
Step 2: Fill it with change, cash or checks.
Step 3: Return the bottle on Mother’s Day.
This Mother’s Day, please join us in celebrating and supporting mothers in our community by participating in our Baby Bottle Drive for HOPE in Northern Virginia. Baskets of empty baby bottles will be available in the church vestibule the weekend of Saturday, May 4, and Sunday, May 5. Please take an empty bottle, fill it with change, cash or checks (made payable to St. Agnes), and return it following any Mass on Mother’s Day weekend, May 12.* Every penny donated allows HOPE to continue caring for mothers and their babies by providing compassion, material resources and education to women, both during and after their pregnancies. To learn more about HOPE in Northern Virginia, visit friendsofhopeinnova.org.
Please contact Sally Yenson, St. Agnes Pro-Life Awareness Team Leader, with any questions at [email protected].
*If you are unable to return your bottle on Sunday, May 12, please bring it to the Parish Office May 13-15, between 8:00 am - 4:00 pm. Please do NOT leave filled bottles unattended in the vestibule.
Opioid Parish Talk Wednesday, May 15 7:30 pm | Parish Hall With Dr. Michael Horne Catholic Charities Diocese of Arlington
Dr. Horne will discuss why opioid addictions are so serious and how the opioid
epidemic is affecting our local Diocese. He will also provide information on how
to respond and help combat this crisis.
Michael Horne, PsyD, is the Director of Clinical Services for Catholic Charities of the Diocese of Arlington and part of Catholic Charities’ response to the opioid addiction crisis in the Diocese. He is the author of “The Tech Talk: Strategies for Families in a Digital World” (Our Sunday Visitor, 2017). Dr. Horne has presented on parenting, technology and relationships across the United States, Canada and the UK. He has appeared on EWTN TV and Radio, Relevant Radio, and SiriusXM presenting on a variety of topics related to technology, families, and the opioid crisis. Horne holds a doctorate in clinical psychology from the Institute for the Psychological Sciences.
Call the Parish Office with any questions at 703-525-1166.
PA
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Free FORMED Subscription
Check out FORMED.org! Parishioners
register with our parish code: f1a3f2.
St. Agnes is on Facebook! Share the love, and Like us on Facebook
www.facebook.com/saintagneschurch/.
MyParishApp Text App to 88202 to download
our free parish app.
Cub Scout Pack 111
Thanks You! With your support and generosity, Cub
Scout Pack 111 was able to meet its
fundraising goal from this year’s Easter
Flower Sale. And with the helping hands
of our Extraordinary Ministers of Holy
Communion and the Boy Scouts who
were working on their Ad Altare Dei
religious awards, they were able
to deliver Easter flowers to 14
homebound parishioners and nearly
40 Catholic residents of the nearby
Cherrydale Rehabilitation Center. Thank
you to all who purchased, donated or
delivered flowers!
Thank You Sodality
of St. Monica Thank you to the Sodality of St. Monica
for the wonderful Easter Vigil Reception
on the evening of Saturday, April 20.
Remembrance Circle Parishioners who have lost loved ones
are invited for prayer and conversation
this Sunday, May 5, from 1:00 pm - 2:30
pm in the St. Agnes Convent (Door #15).
Please RSVP to Karen Swingle at
First Holy
Communion Mass The First Holy Communion Mass for
St. Agnes School students will take place
next Saturday, May 11, at 9:00 am. Please
arrive early if you plan to attend this
Mass.
Restoring Our Legacy:
A Shining City on a Hill May Update
Following Bishop Burbidge and the Diocesan Building
Commission’s approval of the next phase of design
and engineering services, the Master Plan Committee
met to begin refining the concepts for our renovations
for actual designs. We will provide more details as we
move forward. The second Sunday of the month is
St. Agnes Pledge Redemption Sunday. Please
consider dropping your pledged gift in the offertory
then, which this month is Sunday, May 12. Call the
Parish Office at 703-525-1166 with any questions.
Parish Special Needs Collection This year’s Parish Special Needs Collection is…for our
parish. As you may have noticed, our weekly offertory
contributions have been down steadily for about six
months, as have average bequests. So, while in recent
years, your contributions to this special collection
have funded new hymnals, scholarships for children
to attend St. Agnes School and more, we ask that you
prayerfully consider a contribution to our church this
Mother’s Day, May 12, to help cover operating costs
that make all of our parish activities possible. We will
continue to be good stewards of your sacrificial
donations!
2019 Bishop’s Lenten Appeal
"Together in the Light of Christ" Thank you to those who have pledged support to this
year's BLA. We are currently at 83% of our parish's
goal! If you haven’t yet contributed, please
consider doing so. Contact Amber Roseboom at
[email protected] for more information.
St. Agnes Nursery, This Sunday The nursery is available this Sunday, May 5, during
the 9:00 am Mass for 1 - 5 year olds and the first and
third Sundays of each month.
New Parishioner Welcome Dinner Are you new to the parish or would you like to
connect with fellow parishioners over a casual dinner?
Join us Saturday, May 18, from 6:30 pm - 8:30 pm at
the home of parishioner Katie Lundstrom, 3197 18th
Street N. in Arlington. Space is limited, so
please RSVP to Emily Paxton Duncan at
Weekly Prayer Intentions:
For those who are sick in our midst: James Santelli, Phillip Harrington, Joanne Kunz,
Katylee McInerney, John Mulrooney, Steve Ponticello,
Olivia Egge and the residents of Cherrydale Health
and Rehabilitation.
To add a name, or if a name may be removed because
the person is no longer ill (Deo gratias!), please contact the
Parish Office at 703-525-1166. Names of the sick are listed for
approximately four weeks unless we are notified otherwise.
Saint Agnes Essentials:
Infant/Child Baptism:
Baptisms are celebrated the 1st and 3rd Sundays
of each month, after the Noon Mass. Contact the
Parish Office to register at 703-525-1166 or
Marriage Preparation:
Call the Parish Office for Pre-Cana at least 7
months prior to your wedding.
Anointing of the Sick:
Call the Parish Office to request Anointing of the
Sick. Anyone with a serious illness should
request this sacrament before being admitted to
the hospital.
Homebound Visitation:
Contact [email protected] or call the
Parish Office at 703-525-1166.
How to become Catholic:
Interested in joining the Catholic Church or want
to learn more? Contact Bernadette Michael in the
Religious Education office at 703-527-1129 or a
priest for more information. Rite of Christian
Initiation of Adults (RCIA) classes are held on
Mondays at 7:30 pm.
Holy Orders/Consecrated Life:
Is the Lord calling you? For information about
priesthood, the permanent diaconate, or the
consecrated life, contact a priest or the Diocesan
Vocations Office at 703-841-2514.
Registration/Change of Address:
Registration cards are in the racks at main
entrances of the church, the Parish Office, or on
our website. Return them to the Parish Office, or
email them to [email protected].
The repose of the souls who recently passed:
Evangeline Matreo; and Sr. Patrick Hogan, aunt of
Mary Roos.
Adoration Chapel “Come to Me, all you who labor and are burdened,
and I will give you rest" (MT 11: 28).
Jesus Christ waits for you in the most Holy Eucharist.
Permanent and substitute adorers are needed daily
between 1:00 am and 4:00 am to restore perpetual
adoration in the Adoration Chapel at St. Agnes. To
make a commitment, please e-mail Michael Sirotniak
Events
Brunch | May 12 | 1:15 pm | Convent
All Young Adults are cordially invited to join us
for a free Brunch next Sunday, May 12, after the
noon Mass. Enjoy good company along with
bacon, eggs, sausage and more. Please bring a
pastry or fruit to share! RSVP to Frank O’Donnell
For more info. contact Alexandra Fee at
For more information contact the school office at 703-527-5423.
Activities
Youth Group | Sundays | 6:00 pm | Gym
St. Agnes High Schoolers are welcome to join the
youth group for evenings of service, talks, games,
and food. Bring your appetite and we’ll supply the
rest! Text @agnesyouth to 81010 to receive
updates.
For more information contact:
Saint Agnes School
Youth Ministry (9th - 12th Grades)
Young Adults (Ages 21-35)
St. Agnes School is a Catholic
community centered on the teachings
of Jesus Christ and strengthened by the
partnership between parents, who are the
primary educators of our students, and
our dedicated teaching staff.
We believe in the mission to educate
our students so that they become loving
Christians, inspired learners, outstanding
achievers, natural communicators, and
strong servants of God.
It’s hard to believe that it’s
the last full month of the school
year, but St. Agnes School
students are in full swing!
Chick-fil-A Day Tuesday, May 7, we will have a Chick-fil-A
fundraiser.
Hispanic Heritage Assembly
& Early Dismissal School will dismiss early on Friday, May 10, at
11:30 am. Join us for the Hispanic Heritage
Assembly prior to that at 10:00 am.
First Holy Communion Please pray for our second graders as
they make their First Holy Communion on
Saturday, May 11.
Father-Daughter Dance Mark your calendars for the Father-Daughter
Dance on May 18 in the school gym.
Stewardship: Parish Support - 8 - 819 Sunday Collection (in pew & via mail) $ 26,016
Faith Direct (electronic collection) $ 14,337
Total Offertory for Week $ 40,353
Catholic Home Missions (in pew & via mail) $ 2,231
Catholic Home Missions (electronic collection) $ 1,099
Total $ 3,330
Offertory Budget (FY 18-19) $ 1,700,000
Offertory Budget (through 4/28/19) $ 1,421,509
Offertory Actual (through 4/28/19) $ 1,410,010
Stewardship Report
Brother Dennis and Associates Brother Dennis and Associates,
the parish’s outreach program
to support the building of
the faith, frequently makes
donations to Christian groups in little-known
corners of the globe. This week’s donation is
different. It’s to a church and a place
everyone knows, but a church very much in
need, the Cathedral of Notre Dame in Paris,
which was severely damaged by fire during
Holy Week. Shortly after the fire, Bishop
Burbidge wrote to the priests of the Arlington
Diocese asking their aid in repairing “this
great symbol of our faith and our
civilization.” The bishop requested that the
priests remember, in their prayers, the French
people “with whom we are in solidarity at
this time of tragedy.” In addition, the bishop
asked the priests to consider having their
parishes make a donation to rebuilding Notre
Dame. In response to his appeal, St. Agnes
Parish, via Brother Dennis and Associates, is
donating $1,800 to repair a church no one
ever imagined would need the help of the
world.