BUILDING A FRAMEWORK TO STOP BULLYING

Ruth Ann DapkusED 526

Winter 2016

WHAT IS BULLYING?

    “one or more individuals inflicting physical, verbal, or emotional abuse on another” (Fried 2014).  Bullying takes at least two individuals “when a stronger, more powerful person hurts or frightens a smaller or weaker person deliberately” and this occurs ‘repeatedly’ (Beane 2011).

SIGNS TO WATCH FOR Frequently hit or push other childreno Are physically strong and socially dominanto Have a positive view of aggressiono Have trouble following ruleso Show little empathy for otherso Are emotionally immatureo Are irresponsibleo Show inadequate social skills (also true for bully/victims)o Seek attention (think fear equals respect)o Are often contemptuous of both children and adultso Are often academically below averageo Cannot and will not accept responsibility for their actionsF

RECOGNIZE THE PROBLEM

“A bully turned friend will be a friend to the end”

Steps must be taken in order to build empathy and reach this point with many students.

Bullies, Targets and Witnesses play an important role!

Teachers can:-Provide a Toolkit for all students both the victim and perpetrator so that they may confront emotions.

WHO ARE BULLIES?

1.) Children who bully are victims themselves & more likely to have witnessed similar behavior at home. 2.) Have predisposed factors such as ADD or ADHD don't always understand how to act appropriately and hyperactivity can lead to physically inappropriate behavior (Fried 2014).3.) Bullying is always directed from the stronger student towards the weaker one (can resemble a ‘social’ pecking order).

“Bullying is a learned behavior, acquired

primarily from family members and/or

friends” (Fried 2004).

HOWEVER…

Anyone can be a bully or a victim!

WHO ARE VICTIMS??Click icon to add picture

1.) Children with Asperger's syndrome (often targets as well as perpetrators because of their inability to adapt socially to situations)2.) Sexual minority youth experience greater incidences of bullying than their non-sexual minority counterparts.3.) Any individual with psychological or physical vulnerable qualities is often victim of bullying. Bullies target victims that can’t readily defend themselves

Aspergers

Sexual Minority Youth

Psychological or physically vulnerable

METHODS OF BULLYING

1.) Physical (punching, kicking, hitting e.g. usually starts with verbal and escalates into physical violence)2.) Verbal (verbal taunting, tagging, racial or sexual slurs & most common type of bullying)3.) Emotional (humiliation/ intimidation. It can be directed verbally and can cause emotional damage because it strips victims individuality.

RELATIONAL AGGRESSION

• Relational aggression harms others by friends or classmates manipulating relationships.• “I won't’ be your friend if you

spend time with her” the ‘relationship’ itself serves as a vehicle for directing aggression. Victim can experience ‘peer isolation’.

• When others think students have a particular sexual orientation, ‘allies’ with others of a particular sexual orientation, family members or friends.• Occurs among teenage boy

bullies. Columbine shooters -described as “appear to have been targets of sexual name-calling by a number of students for an extended period of time” (Fried 2014).

HOMOPHOBIC BULLYING

METHODS (CONT.)

CYBERBULLYING

“The Internet enables us to find new ways to taunt--cyberbullying” (Fried 2014).

* Includes harassing via text messaging, group ‘text attacks’ , changing someone’s password, ‘impersonating’ someone else, creating rumors through blogs or ‘polls’

* Rumors get spread rapidly through online platforms.

* On the rise with K-12 students! (Teach netiquette & Digital Citizenship across the curriculum)

GIRLS

•  More likely to be targets of ‘relational aggression’- team up• Isolating, ostracizing &

gossip are issues involved in girl bullying. • Not as direct with

aggression, more psychological approach.

• Boys are taught to ‘work it out’ fighting or physical aggression is often not frowned upon but considered the norm.• Gender issues include

sexual name calling and homophobia.• One on one bullying.

BOYS

GENDER ISSUES

SOCIAL EMOTIONAL DEVELOPMENT

* Helps a child succeed in life and makes them feel like they belong.* Boosts self esteem and academics.* Please and thank you is a necessary sign of respect.* The ‘rude’ kid can feel ostracized and become isolated. * Necessary for inclusion into the classroom community.

ANGER MANAGEMENT

• “What am I feeling?”• “Am I angry?”• “Am I disappointed?”• “Am I sad?”• “Am I frustrated?”• “Am I hurt?”

Take a ‘time out’ &

Reflect!

PROBLEM SOLVING SKILLS

 SOCCSS (Situation, Options, Consequences, Choices, Strategies,

Simulation)

Examine Actions!

Take Responsibili

ty!Accept +

and – Consequenc

es!

Seek to understand

!

Make smart

choices!

FOCUS ACTIVITIESExpress anger in words. “It's Okay to be angry…”

Confirm ‘listening’ by repeating what is being said.

Discuss ‘reason’ for being angry.

Cool off in ‘time out’.Exercise/physical activity.

Deep breaths, music, visualizations, reading (calming activities)

Distract them with another activity.

Share personal example of overcoming anger.

Draw a picture, write to describe feelings.

TARGETS• Be assertive• Don’t look like an easy target• Be open and honest with adults• Stay calm• Stay confident• Confuse• Comeback• Disarm• Stay with friends

• Tell a friend• Challenge• Include• Don’t laugh• Don’t join forces• Don’t repeat• Support a target in private

WITNESSES

STRATEGIES

PARENTSCan be helpful:

• With their own children

• With other parents

• With other children

• With teachers and school administrators

• Parents as advocates!

SKILLS, OBSERVATION, SUPPORT

Victims need “language ideas, scripts, and role-playing opportunities to act out possible scenarios” (Fried 2014).

Explain passive, aggressive and assertive response types !

Bullies strike and then “cower behind the curtain”

Victims must feel empowered & have an adult to go to.

ADULTS

• Observation by adults is key and support is necessary.• Diligent monitoring should take place by all adults

present. • A strict policy of ‘inclusion’ should be practiced. • Adequate adult supervision helps (most bullying takes

place out of sight)• Even witnesses need skills to help them stand up to

the group when bullying occurs. • Support needs to come from all areas and all adults at

school.

TEN WAYS1. Establish clear rules and consequences2. Deal with verbal abuse before it escalates

3. Mobilize witnesses 4. Take bullying reports seriously

5. Realize the challenges of making change6. Guarantee confidentiality

7. Avoid embarrassing the student1. Utilize classroom leaders

2. Speak to bullies and targets separately 3. Reinforce the classroom code of conduct

4. Build a sense of ‘community’

REFERENCES

Beane, A. L. (2011). The new bully free classroom: proven prevention and intervention strategies for teachers K-8. Free Spirit Publishing.

Fried, S., & Fried, P. (2004). Bullies, targets, and witnesses: Helping children break the pain chain. Rowman & Littlefield.

Patchin, J. W., & Hinduja, S. (2008). Bullying Beyond the School Yard.