Revelation of Oneness

7/27/2019 Revelation of Oneness

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J F graduated in Astrophysics from Cambridge

University in 2001. Several years after graduation, he

became addicted to the idea of spiritual enlightenment,

and embarked on an intensive spiritual search which lasted

for several years. e spiritual search came to an absolute

end with the clear seeing that there is only ever Oneness.

In the clarity of this seeing, life became what it always

was: spontaneous, clear, joyful and fully alive. Jeff now

holds meetings and retreats in the UK and Europe, clearlyand directly pointing to the frustrations surrounding the

spiritual search, to the nature of mind, and to the Clarity at

the heart of everything.


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Also by Jeff Foster:

Life Without A Centre

Beyond Awakening


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THEREVELATION

OF ONENESS

Dialogues on Nondualityand Spiritual Awakening

J F

non-duality press


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First published July 2008 by N-D P

Jeff Foster 2008

Jeff Foster has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and

Patents Act, 1988, to be identified as author of this work.

All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced or utilised in any form or

by any means, electronic or mechanical, without prior permission in

writing from the Publishers.

Typeset in Warnock Pro 11/13.5

N-D P, Salisbury, SP2 8JP

United Kingdom

ISBN 978-0 -9558290-4 -8

www.non-dualitybooks.com


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Out beyond ideas of wrong doingand right doing

there is a field.

Ill meet you there.

When the soul lies down in that grassthe world is too full to talk about.

Ideas, language, even the phrase each otherdoesnt make any sense.

Rumi


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Contents

Introduction ixExpressing the Inexpressible1

D O: Te Spiritual Search ...........................5

D T: Te Myth of Mind ........................... 57

D T: Unity in Diversity ....................... 123

D F:Abundance ..................................... 179

D F:An Ordinary Awakening .............. 225

One, One, One ............................................................... 277

Note: the transcripts in this book have been anonymised. Edits

have been made to improve the clarity of the text in its translation

from the original audio, and occasionally different questions and

answers have been combined.


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Introduction

Jesus said to them:

When you make the two one,

And when you make the inside like the outside

And the outside like the inside,

en will you enter the Kingdom.

Gospel of omas

Aquiet revolution in spirituality is taking place. ereis a growing sense that freedom cannot be found inphilosophies, religions, ideologies; that it cannot be locatedin books, or reached through lifetimes of intense spir-

itual practice; that it cannot be passed on by enlightened

or awakened spiritual masters; that it cannot be owned,

cannot be taught, cannot be captured.

ere is a growing sense that freedom is all there is, that it

goes right to the heart of what you are, that it is constantlyavailable and costs nothing. And thats what this message,

which I call Life Without A Centre, points to the abso-

lute freedom right at the heart of life. Its a radical message,

to be sure. And yet its as soft and gentle as a kiss from a

loved one.

is book is about the possibility that the spiritual search,

and indeed all the seeking of the mind, can come to an end,

once and for all. And in the absence of that search, there

can be a clear seeing that all there is, is Oneness. And in


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the clarity of Oneness, life loses its heaviness, and what is

is always enough. Some people have called this spiritual

awakening. But its not something complicated. Its notreserved for the lucky few. Its an awakening as simple and

obvious as the sound of the rainsplish-splashingup on the

roof. Its a bit like having a dream, and getting lost in it, and

then waking up, and opening your eyes, and looking around

and realising thatyes, of course, it was just a dream

ere is no condemnation of seeking here, or of any reli-

gion or belief system. Seeking is nothing more or less than

a longing for Home, a desperation to remember who you

really are beyond name and form, beyond thoughts, beyond

concepts, beyond all beyonds. And the search plays itself

out, as it must. is is not to condemn the seeking, but to

point to the possibility that it can fall away, to reveal some-thing far more explosive than the spiritual teachings of this

world ever promised.

is is not a new set of beliefs, or a fresh collection of ideas

for the mind to chew on. No, this communication uses

words to go beyond words, to point to something that can-

not really be spoken of. It is not a teaching, not a commu-

nication from individual to individual, but a sharing from

Oneness to Oneness. A sharing that ends in a revelation

which completely transcends the dream of me-and-you.

And on some level, no more words are really necessary: it

is already complete. Oneness is already perfectly whole,arising presently as the chair, the floor, the table, the body,

the eyes, the nose, the arms, the legs, the heart beating, the

breathing. All of this is Oneness, and nothing is out of place.

And yet, for the individual, perhaps this cannot yet be seen.


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For the individual, there may be more reading, more effort,

more going to spiritual meetings, more meditating, and

more trying to understand all of this. And thats exactlyas it must be. e teachings of nonduality will appear to

be relevant as long as there is an individual there trying to

grasp them. at is the only purpose of these words: to be

there, in friendship and love, for that individual. To meet

them exactly where they are.

But when that individual dissolves into clarity, when the

search unravels, these pointers to the ineffable will fall

away too, and there will only be the immediacy of what is,

with nobody there to know it. ere will be a robin singing

in the tree, a car whooshing past on the road, a cup of tea

in your hand, and it will all be the divine Mystery; you will

never look for anything else ever again, and there will be acomplete release from the burden of individuality. A per-

fectly ordinary life will be lived, but nobody will be living

it. And, in joy and clarity, it will be seen that there has only

ever been this freedom, and that all the seeking and suffer-

ing of a lifetime played out in absolute innocence.

It may help to speak briefly about my past bearing in mind,

of course, that what we call the past is just a memory, just a

thought arising presently, and that my past is really no more

special than your past, or anyone elses for that matter..

In my mid-twenties, after a lifetime of shyness, anxiety and

an intense dislike of the entity I called myself, I entered a

period of deep depression and illness. Fuelled by the desire

to escape the suffering of a lifetime, I then embarked on


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an intense spiritual search which lasted for several years,

taking me on a journey through all the worlds religions

and spiritual traditions. For all of my life I had been acommitted atheist, but the suffering had finally become

so intense that an escape into spirituality seemed to be the

only option.

I became addicted to the idea of spiritual awakening, and

shut myself off from the outside world, meditating and self-

enquiring and constantly changing and questioning my

belief systems, reading literally hundreds of spiritual books

and sitting for hours at a time in my garden trying to be

present, waiting for the moment when the separate self

would disappear and suffering would be no more.

However, I never found what I was looking for, and mydespair and frustration reached a critical point. And then,

in the midst of that despair, something opened up. e

mind, exhausted from a lifetime of trying to reach unreach-

able goals, collapsed, and a deep relaxation took place. And

the secret was revealed right in the midst of what Id taken

to be my life. e spiritual search ended with the reali-

sation that there was only Oneness, and life was already

complete, and wasnt separate from what I took myself to

be. In that clear seeing, all seeking fell away, leaving only

the clarity and simplicity of what is. It was a shocking to

realise that the secret of spiritual awakening had been with

me right from the beginning, but I just hadnt been able to

see it, because Id been too busy looking for it, and in that,separating myself from it. But the separation had been an

illusion, and in the falling away of that illusion the truth

was revealed, as clearly as a punch to the stomach. And the

truth was revealed in a chair, a flower, a tree, my hands, my


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feet, everything. e revelation of Oneness had been hap-

pening all around me, in each and every moment, but in

my search for an identity Id missed it completely.

But in hindsight, how perfectly it had all unfolded. A life-

time of seeking and suffering had been necessary in order to

wake me up from the dream of seeking and suffering! And

in fact, the seeking and suffering had always been pointing

to another possibility: they had always been pointing back

Home.

At first, I just met with people in pubs and on park

benches and chatted about my experiences. en a website

appeared, and books got written, and meetings started tohappen, first in London, and then in other parts of the UK

and abroad. I never expected any of it. e whole thing

seems to have a life of its own now, and who knows how it

will evolve?

Its clear that Oneness delights in expressing this message.

And what a gift it is to be able to meet so many people from

all over the world, and yet to see that there are no separate

people at all, and that its all One. Really, Im only ever

meeting myself and every question that Im asked is the

same question: its the mind longing to come Home. What

a perfect play it all is.

Well, now its time to come Home. Read the dialogues with

an open mind, and an open heart, and it may dawn on you:

it was never about the words. Beyond the words, something

else is happening, and its too extraordinary to talk about.


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ese meetings arent really meetings at all. ey are bon-

fires, in which all the questions of the mind unravel and

burn up, leaving only the wonder of what is. Really, nothingcan be said about this burning, because even the attempt

to talk about the burning burns up in this. And yet, words

continue to come, and life continues to unfold, and its

quite clear that we are not in control of this astonishing

dream world, and that we are constantly being embraced

by Oneness, in each and every moment, from cradle to

grave, and beyond.

In these pages, may you meet your own absence, and

explode into wonder.

Jeff Foster

June 2008Brighton, UK


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Expressing the Inexpressible

e Tao that can be told is not the eternal Tao.

e name that can be named is not the eternal Name.

Lao-Tzu, Tao Te Ching

Already, there is only Oneness.

Just life, but nobody living it.

Just this, playing itself out spontaneously, of its own accord,

in its own time.

And there is no you separate from this. ats the illu-

sion. ats the dream. ats the suffering.

Only nothing no-thing arising as everything. Only

the absolute paradox of it all. And yet, in Life Without a

Centre, there are still faces, places, feelings, ups and downs.Although now the ups are equalto the downs, pain is equal

to pleasure, the most excruciating suffering is equalto the

greatest joy. Because with the collapse of the individual self

comes the ending of all opposites, all opposition, all dual-

ity, which is to say that everything now exists in perfect

balance, as it always has done.

And yet, there is nobody there to know that balance,

nobody who could name it, nobody who could speak of it,

even if they wanted to.


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is isgrace, and it will never be captured in words.

And yet the words come

e mind asks:

How to use dualistic concepts to describe that which is

beyond duality? And anyway, isnt beyond duality just

another concept, perhaps the biggest concept of them all?

e mind will struggle with these dream questions. But

it has missed the point entirely. e mind is so lost in the

dream of time and space that it could never hope to see

this.

You see, what is being said here has nothing to do with

words.

Once we get tangled up in words and concepts and mean-

ings were so totally, completely, utterly lost. Because this

message is about what is presently happening: present

sights, sounds and smells. Its about the utterly obvious

present appearance of life, an appearance which appears

to nobody, an appearance which dances and swirls and

pretends to be solid but actually has no solidity at all, an

appearance which cannot be grasped in any way, by anyone

at any time.

Its an appearance which cannot be escaped, cannot be

denied, cannot be transcended, because the person who

would try to do any of these things does not even exist.


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at person is an apparition, a ghost, a mirage, a thought.

And what power does thought have?

And so this is the end of choice, the end of control, and a

plunge into something far more explosive.

is is the absolute freedom which cannot be reached

through any sort of effort or non-effort.

is is the end of duality because it is the wide open space,

the vastness in which duality appears to arise in the first

place.

is is totally extraordinary, and yet it is nothing special.

is is the miracle of all miracles, and yet it is as simple asbreathing.

is is death, and yet it is also the source of all life.

is is not a concept to be understood, not a new belief to

be believed.

is is breathing, this is the heart beating, this is an entire

world arising out of nothing and falling back into nothing,

ceaselessly, playfully, like waves in the ocean, like icy breath

on a winters day, like the memory of a loved one long since

departed.

is is not a state to be reached.

It is not something that some people have and others

dont.


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is is just a description of the utterly obvious.

And its so simple a newborn baby could see it:

Life has no centre.

And never did.


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DIALOGUE ONE

The Spiritual Search

From wherever and whenever this insight is

communicated, it has no connection withend-gaining, belief, path or process.

It cannot be taught but is continuously shared.

It needs not to be argued, proven or embellished,

for it stands alone simply as it is.

Tony Parsons


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Part One

Jeff: On some level we all have a sense of something beyond.

Something beyond the coming and going of things, beyond

who we think we are, beyond the endless cycle of birth

and death, beyond our achievements, beyond our names.

Beyond all beyonds, there is a sense of unity, a sense of

Oneness, of wholeness.

And as very young children, as babies, we are not yet

separate from Life, and with that there is an innocence,

a very alive and very palpable sense of wonder at the

world. Somehow, as adults, we lose that sense of wonder,

that sense of being absolutely present, totally at one with

whatever is happening. We become very solid, very heavy,full of knowledge, full of regret, full of anxiety about the

future. We feelseparate from life. We fall into duality. We

talk about me and my life, me and my past, me and my

goals, as if we were somehow separate from these things.

Unlike newborn babies, we have a very fixed idea of who we

are. We cease to be amazed at life as it is. We stopplaying.

We become very complex creatures.

Now, what we are talking about today is not a new message.

You find it everywhere really. All religions and spiritual tra-

ditions, in the end point to this Oneness, this Unity. And

they call it God, or they call it Spirit, or they call it Energy,

or they refuse to even talk or think about it.

And if you have come this far, you have a sense of what

these words are pointing to. But of course you do, because

its not separate from what you are!


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But we get very lost, dont we, in our search. In our spir-

itual search, as well as our material search. e minds

never ending search forsomething more. We never seem tobe satisfied with what is, with whats happening. It never

seems to be enough, and in a million different ways we try

to recapture this sense of Oneness, having felt that we lost

it somewhere along the way.

We were all newborn babies once; weve all tasted that

simplicity, that freedom. And so to try and recapture it

(although of course we dont realise thats what were doing)

we meditate, we plunge ourselves into our careers, we drink

or take drugs to lose ourselves, we read spiritual books and

self-help guides, we fall in and out of love, we spend our

money on things we dont really need.

We spend our lives trying to come home. ats what we all

want, really: to come home, just to come home.

What we are talking about today is the possibility that you

never left home in the first place. e possibility that the

sense of being a separate person is just an illusion, and that

the illusion can fall away. And in that falling away, whats

left is seen in absolute clarity to be Oneness. Yes, eve-

rythingis seen to be that. ere is nothing that Oneness is

not otherwise it wouldnt be Oneness!

And it can be seen in clarity that this whole search of ours

is just a game that Oneness is playing with itself. Tryingto find itself. e wave trying to become the ocean. Just a

harmless game, the cosmic entertainment. And there can

be so much laughter when this is seen. And in the seeing of

it, it is released.


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No wonder our desperate search for Oneness can only ever

lead to frustration and disappointment, to a sense of not

quite being there yet, of not quite being home, not quitebeing whole. Because in the attempt to find that, we are

fuelling the sense of separation, the sense that we are not

there already, and its a vicious circle.

So we arent going to be learning any new practices today.

is is just a description of what there already is, of whats

happening now. But the poor little mind cant see it! We

cant see it! Well of courseyou cant see it! Becauseyou the

individual who thinks he is separate from the Whole dont

exist! You are just a thought, arising now, arising in this!

What were talking about today isnt about the words, and

we can get so lost in words and concepts. But its not aboutthe concepts and it never was. But the words and concepts

are fine, they are part of the play of Oneness as well. We

dont need to reject the words or concepts, or reject our spir-

itual practices. Just to point to the possibility that perhaps

already there is Oneness, right at the heart of things, right

here. Where else would it be? And perhaps in the seeing of

that, the practising and the striving and the longing will fall

away, to reveal a clarity thats absolutely beyond mind.

And this isnt something complicated. Its not an intel-

lectualunderstanding. We dont need any more concepts,

any more knowledge. e amount of knowledge we have

already is enough! So this isnt really about the words, or theunderstanding of those words, its really about the and the

moment you say it youve turned it into something call it

an energy, call it a resonance, its undeniably there when the

seeking subsides. On the surface what is happening here is


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that a bunch of people have gathered in a room to listen to

someone else talk about nonduality and spiritual awaken-

ing. But whats really happening here is quite astonishing:Oneness is meeting itself. And thats what its always doing.

Were just pointing back to it here. at there is no solid

you at the heart of your life. ats the mirage, thats the

illusion, thats the heaviness. eres just life living itself.

And to the mind this is heresy! e mind goes of course

Im in control!Im doing this!Im responsible for everything

that happens! So this message can be quite threatening to

a mind hooked on the idea of choice and control. But really

this is the freedom of it:Life lives itself. We are not separate

people in a room. ere is only wholeness, and it constantly

shines.

And some spiritual teachings talk about awakening,

enlightenment or liberation, and they can make it sound

like its something you can get, given time. Something you

can have. And the beauty of this, is that its so open, so free

that it cant be possessed, it cant be grasped, it cant be had

by an individual. And that is the freedom of it. e frustra-

tion in the spiritual search is the attempt to grasp this, to

grasp the ungraspable. It doesnt need to be grasped. Its

already presenting itself. And yet, in this, the endless seek-

ing of the mind is allowed to continue for as long as it needs

to. Even seeking is allowed in this. Seeking is as much One-

ness as anything else, and thats the ultimate secret really.

We can spend our lives trying to put an end to seeking,trying to stop the mind, but the mind never needed to be

stopped. ats the beauty of this, nothing needs to stop.

Oneness embraces it all, allows it all to continue, until it

doesnt anymore. And on some level this is already recog-


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nised. Weve all been newborn babies. Were still newborn

babies, really. Innocent, whole. We just got a little confused

for a while.

So, it cannot be understood. And thats the freedom of it.

ats the beauty of it. Well open up now for questions,

and comments, and apparent answers. But really this isnt

about the questions and the answers. Its about something

thats far too simple for all of that. And yet the questions

and answers play themselves out, and its so obvious that

youre not doing that. If you could stop the seeking, stop

the questioning, you would do it right now, youd have done

it already. e mind just plays itself out. is is life living

itself. So all we can do with words is to try and point back

to this as clearly as we can.

Questioner: Jeff, I recognise almost everyone in this

room. Weve all come many times to ask questions.

Youve sat and listened to us asking questions. What is

the most common error that we make?

Well, questioning is what the mind does! e mind wants

to grasp this freedom, wants to understand it, wants to

take it and use it somehow. So really, every question is the

same question. Every question rests on the assumption

that there is a separate person there, a questioner, and that

there is an answer that you can get, and that once you getthe answer, you know, bang! So really its all thesame ques-

tion. Every question is the same question. Its a movement

into a future. Into some sort of future understanding.


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So theres no basic, fundamental error. Because to say that

there is a fundamental error would be to imply that you

could somehow correct the error, given time. at there issomething you are doing wrong, something that you can

fix, given time. No, nothing needs to be corrected. e

assumption of a separate person is just an assumption. An

assumption does not need to be corrected through effort.

But when that assumption is seen in clarity, it no longer

has any power. And this seeing is happening now, and its

always happening, although that could never be apparent

to a separate individual.

Q. I think thats the part where I get confused. I dont

feel that its happening now. I hear you and other teach-

ers saying that I am at, that I already know all of this,

and yet I still blather on with these questions!

AndItis what is doing the blathering. Right now! Oneness

is right there, blathering away!

e questions just come out. ey happen. If you could

somehow correct this, if this was something you could do,

if there was an answer, if someone could tell you how to

correct this problem, there would be a formula, and you

would just do it. ats the myth. ats the search. e

search for the antidote to a non-existent problem.

So, there is the assumption that this needs to be seen by

you, which implies a future. Well, I tried for years to seethis, but I never could. It was only in thefalling away of the

seeking that it revealed itself.

And its this. And its here. And its now.


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Q. So what needs to fall away is the thought that this can

be seen in the future?

Well, you could spend years trying toget ridof that thought

too!

Q. Yes, its circular.

Yes. e mind always wants to do something. It doesnt

want to hear that nothing needs to be done. And thats

notthe same as saying dont do anything. ings will be

done. In fact, everything that needs to be done is already

being done. Look, right now, thoughts are swirling around.

Are you doing that? If you were doing that, you would be

able to stop those thoughts right now!

You see, everything just happens, and this is the last thing

that the mind wants to hear! Its all spontaneous, the whole

thing. And you cant reach spontaneity. You cant reach the

effortless using effort.

Q. Actually I felt that spontaneity coming here today. I

didnt really want to come here, but it happened.

Yes, everything just happens. But the mind doesnt want to

hear that. It wants to be in control, or at least to think that

its in control. And there can be a sense of fear beneath that.

e mind fears losing its illusory control! And actually the

fear is groundless. e fear is the separate person trying tocling onto control. e mind reacts against the existence of

the separate person being seen through.

e good news is that there is nothing to fear. ere isjust


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the fear. Just presently arising fear. And the fear is just

energy, aliveness, its not really fear at all. Its not solid.

Its a play of energy happening. And we call it fear. Itsmy fear, Ive got to do something with the fear. ats the

illusion.

Q. And its really only a thought?

Yes. You see, really these are notyourquestions, this is not

your fear. is is not your mind. Its not my mind or his

mind or hermind. Its all the same mind. Its all the same

question. Its the Universe questioning itself. Any question

that you could ask here, its been asked before. You are not

alone.

Every single question that arises at these meetings, Ivealready asked them. For years and years, I asked every

single question known to man. And I never found a single

answer, not one that satisfied anyway. Not one that ulti-

mately satisfied. Answers satisfy for a while, and then the

next question comes up!

Q. It all feels very unsatisfactory!

Yes, of course, because every question assumes an answer.

An answer out there, that I can get. And thats the basic dis-

satisfaction. But what ifthis is the answer? What if this - the

present moment, whats happening right now, whatever you

want to call it - is the answer? e answer of all answers?at burns up all questions, and with it, all dissatisfaction

at your lack of answers!

Everything that is arising is appropriate, it has to be.


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Because youre not doing it. is is way too simple. To the

mind, it seems almost nave. But how can you deny what

is? What is arising presentlyhas to be arising. It must.

e mind cannot go there. But its where you always are.

Its home.

(Long silence)

To the mind this is almost madness. at everything is

okay. at what arises is as it should be, because it couldnt

be any other way. To the mind it sounds almost crazy.

Either that, or the mind isnt interested!

To the mind, what we are talking about has no value. e

mind cannot do anything with this. ere is no food herefor a hungry ego. is cannot be used, and thats the free-

dom of it.

Q. And yet the mind wants this, doesnt it? It searches. It

desires. e mind has a funny relationship with this.

e mind lives in a world of things. Of duality. Of bounda-

ries and limits. Of this and that. Of up and down, left and

right, good and evil, ignorance and understanding. It tries

to use the world of duality to understand that which is

beyond duality. e mind thinks it can know this. It tries to

use limitation to go beyond limitation, and fails miserably.

But the beauty of this, is that it cannot be captured in any

idea, by any system of thought. It cannot be put into a box

and sold. It if could, it wouldnt be freedom. If it could

be captured, it wouldnt be what it is. Aliveness cannot


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be captured, its too alive! And aliveness will destroy any

attempts to capture it. And yet it allows the seeking too.

e mind will only see paradox here.

Q. e mind thinks that it knows this, doesnt it? Its very

tricky. ere can be impersonations of this. It can try to

convince itself that its experiencing this, when its not.

Yes. e mind has a sense of this, but it cant do anything

with it. It tries to grasp this. And it will claim all sorts of

experiences. But what we are talking about is not an expe-

rience. Experiences come and go in this.

Q. So this is beyond all experience? Which is why it can-

not be described, and you can only point to it?

Yes, and thats why there are no prescriptions. Nobody can

tell you what to do to get Oneness, although many people

will try! e moment someone gives you something to

do, they are feeding the mind. ats what a hungry mind

wants: something to do. Some path, some process, some

more food. Give me something to do is the minds man-

tra. And yet, having said that, there is nothing wrong with

this effort. ats the minds job and it does it perfectly.

Everything performs its function perfectly. ere is no

blame here.

But really, all that effort can become so exhausting. Try-ing to grasp, trying to know, trying to achieve, trying to be

free. Trying to become what you are. Trying to see what

this is. And its bound to end in frustration. Because this is

presenting itself all the time, its constantly revealing itself,


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and that takes no effort on your part whatsoever. And yet

the efforting plays itself out, as it must.

And its always new, always changing, but the mind can

only see what it knows. It sees the past. And it might even

take the words being used here today, and turn this into

some sort of path, some sort of process, some sort of intel-

lectual understanding. is is what the mind does in its

innocence. In its innocence, it tries to grasp this.

Q. But it cant, can it? Its like me trying to awaken. I

cant, because its not me who awakens. e awakening

isfrom the dream of me. eres a real tension there, a

real struggle.

Yes, that seems to be the paradox of this. at there is justwhats happening. Sights and sounds and smells and feel-

ings and colour and textures, just whats happening. Just

what is arising presently. Just this. And yet, in that, there

appears to be this separate me, this person, who appears

to have some sort of life outside of this. And to the mind

that is the absolute paradox of nonduality. It cannot be

understood.

In actuality, there is no paradox. e mind calls it a paradox

because its trying to understand it. Actually there is just

the divine mystery of it all, and it cannot be known. Whats

happening now cannot be known, cannot be grasped. e

paradox of nothing as everything, the paradox of Onenessappearing as separate things. But the mind always moves

away from that absolute simplicity and obviousness of what

is. It moves into a future. It moves into the story of me.


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Q. Is the paradox just the mind trying to understand

something that it will never understand?

Yes. But actually there is no paradox. ere is just the

thought there is a paradox. So this entire world of thought

that the mind has constructed, its gone in a flash, when

the thought isnt there. When the thought goes, the world

goes. ats how fragile it is, thats how precious it is. And

on some level we all know this, that all the concepts in the

world, all the knowledge in the world, cant bring us home.

Because all of it is just a thought!

Q. When youre so used to operating in the world of

thought, everything seems so solid. Its like attention

has to come back to thoughts, otherwise theres a solid

reality around them.

And yet the beauty of thoughts, is that they just arise out of

nowhere. Nobody is thinking. ere are thoughts, but no

thinker. You are not doing thinking.

Q. But somethings gone wrong somewhere?

Apparently so. Its when they begin to be my thoughts,

thats where the problems begin for the individual.

Q. Its absurd really.

Yes, in a sense its absurd. What the mind does is absurd.But in another sense, its absolutely appropriate. Its what it

has to do to find itself. All its trying to do is find itself. All

it wants to do is to come home. And its doing all of this

absurdity in absolute innocence. It doesnt really know what


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its doing! We dont really know what we are doing. If we

did, we wouldnt do most of the stuff we do to ourselves!

But we turn the mind into the enemy. We are always doing

something with the mind, trying to control thoughts, try-

ing to suppress them, putting the mind on a leash. As if you

were separate from it all! As if it were yours to do some-

thing about! But nothing is yours, and thats the freedom.

It all just arises out of nothing, and its spontaneous. ats

the gift of what is. And the moment there is a movement to

try and possess this freedom, thats the suffering.

And yet, in the so-called material world the seeking seems

to work for a while. If you want something, you can go out

and get it. If you want money, you can, apparently, go out

and make money. is seems to work, most of the timeanyway. But the mind thinks it can use that same mecha-

nism to get this freedom. It thinks, in its innocence, that

it can seek its way to freedom, that it can somehowfind

awakening. To the mind, if it cant grasp something, if it

cant possess something, then its worth nothing. But in the

absence of the looking, Oneness reveals itself. And then its

like, oh, it was this, it was here all along!

Q. So seeing just arises when it arises?

Yes, its too simple. Were like newborn babies.

Q. But something is going on here. Being here reminds

me of some sort of spiritual path. I mean, I could be

looking to you to help me get something.


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Yes, in the story, it appears as though you decided to come

here. at you were drawn by something, and ended up

coming here. But actually this sitting in this room, talk-ing to each other is all there is. Its all thats happening.

And in that, the story I came here today arises.

But actually, whats happening is that Oneness is meet-

ing itself. And resonating. And you are not doing this. Its

only in thestory that you did this, that you are somehow

responsible for being here. ats a story we tell.

You know, I could tell the story that I got the train here

today. And on the level of a story, its true. But its just a

story arising now. Its just a thought. And whats far more

alive is this, whats happening. And this allows those stories

to arise. is isnt about denying the stories. If someoneasks me my name, Ill say Jeff. I dont have to say theres

nobody here and Im just a story! So the ordinariness of

this is quite shocking to a mind thats been seeking the

extraordinary for a lifetime. But thats the freedom of it. It

was always in the very ordinary. It was in the table. It was in

the chairs. It was in the floor, the ceiling, the breathing, the

heart beating. e ordinary things of life. And yet we could

never see it, because we were looking for something higher,

something deeper, something more meaningful than what

was already the case. Something more than this.

And wed separated the ordinary from the extraordinary,

the lower from the higher. ats what the mind does, itseparates. In its innocence, its all it can do. So really this is

Oneness meeting itself, as its always doing. Not just at this

meeting, but everywhere.


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Q. So does meditation, or self-enquiry (asking the ques-tion who am I?) feed the mind as well?

Well, you could ask who am I? until you are blue in the

face. But who is asking? You see, you will never find an

answer to that question. You will only ever find the ask-

ing. Just the question who am I? floating in nothingness.

But in that sense it serves a purpose. To lead to a point ofabsolute frustration, showing you that the question who

am I? is based on a faulty assumption that there is a

separate, solid I that can be found through effort. But

there is nothing wrong with self-enquiry. If it happens, its

absolutely appropriate.

Ultimately however, no practice, spiritual or otherwise, can

satisfy, because as long as there is practising, there is asepa-

rate person doing the practice, aseparate person doing the

meditation, aseparate person doing the self-enquiry. So per-

haps that is the point of meditation, self-enquiry, and so on:

to open up the possibility of realising that there is nobody

there who does any of these things in the first place.

And that is the absolute freedom that isnt a result of any-

thing. Freedom cannot be reached through effort. But Im

notsaying dont go off and self-enquire. You have no choice!

If you find yourself self-enquiring, then thats whats hap-

pening, and thats already Oneness. Its Oneness doing theself-enquiry! ats the grand cosmic joke: its all already

Oneness. Spiritual practices are divine, as they are. ere

is no condemnation here, although thats how it might be

heard.


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Q. So there are no special conditions for seeing to arise?It will arise when it does?

eres only ever seeing. e miracle is all thats ever seen.

is doesnt involve a future.

Q. So seeing isnt something thats going to come in thefuture?

Its already happening. Its all thats happening.

Q. But the seeing sometimes appears to be obscured.

ere can be waitingfor seeing. And its just an idea.

Q. So is that idea getting in the way of seeing?

Apparently so. But actually, nothing could ever get in the

way of seeing. Its just an idea that something can get in

the way of seeing! at idea simply arises in the seeing, theseeing that you arent doing. e seeing that is. What can

get in the way of this? is is constantly revealing itself.

eres the idea that you arent seeing it yet. e idea of a

separate person who could see this. e idea of a person

who is separate from this, who one day will see it. And

the whole spiritual search begins there. ats the root ofit all. Really, Oneness is all thats ever seen. All thats ever

smelled. All thats ever heard. All thats ever thought.


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Q. We make a big deal out of this dont we? I mean, with

all our spiritual teachings.

Yes we do.

Q. What is the purpose of ideas getting in the way of see-

ing? Is it part of the play?

Its Oneness playing the game of being separate. And there

is no point to a game. Its just a game, just a joyous play of

light and sound and apparent thoughts getting in the way.

And when the idea of being a separate person falls away, its

allseen to be a game. And in the game, everything is equal,

everything is allowed, everything can be itself fully, but theheaviness goes out of it, the suffering goes out of it. Its a

divine play, and theres nothing serious about it.

To a separate person, this existence can seem very heavy.

Its a big world out there, and you need to protect yourself,

defend yourself, you need to know who you are. ats the

root of the whole thing, the root of all suffering.

Q. But thats part of the same game?

Yes, its Oneness playing the game of being a separate per-

son so it can finally come to know itself.

Q. But there is so much suffering, and it doesnt make

any sense to the mind.

It doesnt make sense because the mind is trying to under-


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stand it. e mind is trying to understand a game, a dance.

Its a dance! A dance cannot be understood, and does not

need to be. Its purpose is not to be understood. e pur-pose of the dance is the dance. It is its own purpose. In

itself, it is already complete. To the mind thats incompre-

hensible. e mind moves away from the sense of Oneness,

and begins to ask why?. When the separation falls away,

that question doesnt even arise anymore.

And yet there appears to be this play of separation, and

apparent people going on a spiritual search, and the fall-

ing away of separation, but its not as a result of anything.

Its uncaused. eres nothing you can do to see all of this,

because you are all of this.

So, why separation? Why suffering? Well, the answer isalways staring you in the face. e answer is this. is puts

an end to all questions. e fact that this is happening is

the answer. To the mind thats too simple. But this simplic-

ity is very powerful. It burns everything up, and leaves only

presence.

Q. Does the mind fear that?

Yes, of course. To the mind, the end of questioning, the end

of me, is like death. What will I do when Im not there? How

will things get done? If the seeking ended, wouldnt I just sit

on the floor in a pool of bodily fluids and do nothing?

(Laughter)

ese are the fears the mind uses to keep itself going, to try

and cling on. And all the while, life just lives itself. As its

doing now. Whats happening now is Oneness doing itself.


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In that there is no fear. e end of the known is the end of

fear. Because its the end of having to defend something.

ere is nothing to defend. ere is just openness. Justlove.


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Part Two

Coming back to the idea of spiritual practices, the reason

I say that there is nothing you can do to get this, and that

there is no spiritual practice that can lead to this, is that

already its being done. What can I do? is the mantra of

the mind. And really every question is just a version of that.

What can I do? And the mind could never see that even

the asking of that question is already Oneness doingitself.And to the mind this sounds crazy!

If you want a spiritual practice, Ill give you one. Its being

here. ere you go.

(Laughter)

Whatever you are doing: sitting on the toilet, walking in

the park, doing your shopping, its already there. Its One-

ness sitting on the toilet, Oneness walking in the park, One-

ness doing the shopping. Oneness does everything. And

the mind comes in and goes Im doing it,Im doing it,Im

doing it! Its a constant monologue, a mantra. e mind

wants to feel responsible, wants to be in control.

You see, the joy of being a child is that there is no control,

its just doing itself. And theres an innocence to that. A

natural innocence that we lose, because we want to play

God. We want to be in control of our thoughts, our feel-

ings, other people, and so on. But another possibility alwayswhispers gently in the background: that its all a dream.

Oneness is doing it all. We have no choice. And theres no

purpose to this play, this dream. e joy of it is in the play-

ing, in the dreaming, and it has no purpose outside of itself.


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Its the Universe playing, dreaming, seeking. e Universe

being fully what it is. But we separate ourselves from it,

and then we wonder why we feel separate, incomplete. Andthen we do so many things in order to lose ourselves. We

turn to drink or drugs or meditation or work, in order to

lose ourselves, to feel at home. Its a kind of addiction. e

mind is an addict.

Q. Couldnt these activities just be Beings way of giving

itself a day off? A break from the illusion of being an

entity?

We think that these activities are giving us an experience

of Oneness. Actually what they are doing is destroyingusas we know ourselves.

Q. Yes but it feels great.

Of course!

Q. So we all dip in and out of this all the time, whatever

the method is: drink, drugs, exercise, and so on. So we

all know this already. And yet we get on the bus or train

and come to these meetings. What are we doing? Are we

trying to get it permanently?

Yes, we always want something permanent. We wantpermanent Oneness, permanent pleasure, permanent

happiness. And we want it all for ourselves. And we think

this is an experience that we can have. Actually when this

happens, you are not there! When youre in the middle of a


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bungee jump, all thought falls away, and youre simply not

there. And the mind comes back in and says I experienced

Oneness. It happened to me. Id like to get it back.ats the search. But the beauty of this, is that we dont

need to jump of a cliff with a piece of elastic tied to our

waists to see it. Its in the very ordinary things too. In the

smallest things.

Q. Yes, thats right, because I was thinking about an

aspect of my last job. When it worked, I was in the zone,

and I didnt have to try. It felt great, and I didnt have to

try at all.

Yes, its a release from the heavy burden of me, from hav-

ing to do or be anything. And in the absence of me, things

get done, effortlessly.

Q. Yes, and its an example of where youre not jumping

off a cliff, but things still get done.

is is revealed all the time. But to the mind it has no

value.

Q. It does to me. I just know when Im in that thing. I feel

a quickening.

Yes but thats not the mind. Its something far beyond

Q. What about if youre doing a really boring job? Its

difficult then to make this seeing happen.


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Yes, you can understand all of this intellectually, and really

that intellectual understanding means nothingwhen youre

sat there in your boring job!

Q. Yes thats the problem. I can know it, but not see it.

Yes, you can sit there in your boring job, and tell yourself

theres nobody here, its all Oneness, and the job is as bor-

ing as ever!

(Laughter)

Perhaps you could tell your boss that theres nobody there

and its all Oneness! He might fire you, and that would solve

everything!

(Laughter)

Q. Or he might not pay me, because theres nobody there

to pay!

(Laughter)

Q. I was walking down the street the other day, looking

around and thinking about this, and I felt really great.

en a guy walked past me and said what are you

leering at?

(Laughter)

Q. He was very aggressive, he was drunk or something.I came back straight away to this unpleasant feeling of

fear.

Yes, the mind comes back in.


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Q. And I guess I could say, well, Jeff says even that is

it, but you know, I wanted to get away from that feeling

straight away. So even the wanting to get away from it,is it?

Yes, but you can tell yourself that and it means nothing!

is is not an intellectual understanding. All the intel-

lectual understanding in the world means nothing, when

youre faced with pain, it just means nothing. It all falls

away in the face of that.

Q. So when things are unpleasant, its alright to know

thats it, but its also alright to still apply some sort of

technique to get you through it?

Oh, absolutely, yes! But this feeling of unpleasantness, itsjust a feeling. Its energy. And the separate person says

right, this is unpleasant, I want something else, I want

something pleasant. So its the search for the pleasant,

the search for something more, the search for a better

situation, thats the duality. What is versus what could be.

ats the suffering. To a separate person this will never be

enough.

So, for example, youre in this boring job. When its seen

that nobody is doing the job, theres no way of knowing

what will happen. It doesnt necessarily mean that youll

leave the job. You might stay. But there is no way of know-

ing in advance. You might find yourself walking away, thatday. You might find yourself staying for the rest of your life.

But the point is you wont know. Life lives itself out of that

not knowing. Its like, I know I dislike this job, I know Im

going to have to stay here, I know that things wont change


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for me. Knowledge becomes so heavy. ats the unpleas-

antness. Its the knowing. I know this job.

Q. But when youre there with it, its often so overwhelm-

ing, whats going on, that you forget all this. In the

moment youre so overwhelmed.

And again thats part of the play. e apparent coming and

going of this. e seeing and the losing of it. ats how

it appears to unfold. But you are not doing that coming

in and going out. If you were doing it, youd stop doing it,

right now!

Q. But sometimes there can be a very thin knowing, very

minute, and sometimes its very strong.

It can appear that way. And it plays itself out. e knowing

of it and the losing of it. And at some point the whole thing

falls away. e very idea that you can come in and go out

falls away. at theres a separate you who can experience

that. at idea falls away. And its seen: Oneness is every-

thing. Its even the boring job.

Q. So, you are patient with the job, you endure it, and

thats a part of it as well? You wait to see if the unpleas-

antness passes? But its like, I sit here and listen to this

stuff, and then go out into the world, and then all the

unpleasantness comes back.

e mind thinks this is something it can use to change

a situation in your life. at you can do that. Actually

when this is seen, when this message resonates, it begins

to do itself. Life situations change by themselves. And, as


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I said, there is no way of knowing that youll be in that

job next week. eres no way of knowing at all, actually.

is is a plunge into the unknown, the unmanifest, theundiscovered. at sense of being a separate person who

goes to work (I am me, I go to work, I do a boring job,

I go home) is the dream. And the mind thinks I could

be doing something else. ats the suffering, isnt it, that

you have a choice. So the choice is the suffering. at you

could be doing something else. Right now, you have no

way of knowing that youll ever go back to work. You could

tellyourself that you will, but actually you dont know, you

cannot know.

When youre at work, there is still just this. e same thing,

whats happening in this meeting, its the same at work, or

anywhere. eres just whats happening, theres just One-ness doing itself. And that can include a feeling of boredom,

a feeling of frustration. Its notyourboredom. Its notyour

frustration. And then theres the idea that you need to get

a better job. Like you have choice in the matter! And that

doesnt mean that you wontget a better job! ats how it

might be heard. Without the story of choice, it just does

itself. And you might find yourself, when its ready, when

life is ready, doing something else. But you want to decide

whats right for life now! ats the suffering. ats the

duality. Life will present it when its ready. It will give you

whats needed.

So right now, you need to be in that job. In Oneness thereare no mistakes, not even the possibility of mistakes. And

intellectually that means nothing. You can be in your job,

as bored as hell, repeating theres no mistakes, and youre

still as bored as hell! So its not about the understanding of


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that. e mind just cannot see that when youre sitting at

your desk, thats exactly what has to be happening, right

then. ats not to say it will ever happen again, its not tosay that you wont leave the job in the next moment. But in

thatmoment, thats exactly what has to be arising, because

you are not doing it. You are not in control of it.

So in Oneness there are no mistakes, there are no problems.

To the individual, there are! e individual could never see

the perfection behind this show. Because the individual

thinks hes separate from Oneness. at he has a choice in

the matter. at he can play God. And the only suffering

now is the idea that you have choice in this, that you can

do something about this. at something needs to be done

about this.

So consider the possibility that youre not doing this. is

guy who goes to work, where is he now? Where is work,

now? Where is boredom, now? Where is unpleasantness,

now? is is all part of the dream.

(Pause)

Q. I cant wait until Monday morning!

(Laughter)

Q. Whats the difference between an intellectual under-standing and that which is not?

at which isnt an intellectual understanding cannot

be spoken of. All Im doing with these words is trying to


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describe as best I can what this is, whats seen over here.

is isnt an intellectual understanding that I have. I tried

for years to grasp this intellectually, but it only ever leftme feeling frustrated and disappointed. Its only when

that desperation to understand fell away that the clarity

revealed itself. And it was seen that there wasnt anything

to see! ere was just what was happening. ere is only

ever whats happening. And that burns up any questions.

And the aliveness of whats happening, it burns up all seek-

ing. And it just leaves this. It leaves whatever is arising in

the moment. And thats not an understanding that I have,

although if you are listening to these words, it might appear

as though theres a separate person here who understands

all of this and can articulate it.

Q. So if theres no cause and effect, I cant see how lis-tening to these gross approximations of what appears

to happen could have any effect on dismantling the

apparent stories!

If you are listening to these words with the aim of disman-

tling your story, there will only be frustration.

Q. Words uttered there are endeavouring to approximate

an understanding in which stories are unravelled.

Look, the words that come out here are a response to those

questions. ey just come out in response to that. Actually

what we are talking about is too ordinary to talk about! Itmay appear as though Im trying to make you understand,

to help you to get this. But I dont see a separate person

there. Which is to say that I see that the idea of a separate

person over there is just a thought. eres no need to


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reject that thought. So theres no attempt here to make an

illusory person over there understand this. Because I never

understood this! So I cant help you to understand. Becausetheres nothing to understand!

(Laughter)

You know, if theres any use to these words, its this: at some

point the mind just gives up! Perhaps thats the purpose of

these words. If the mind were trying to make something

out of these words it would get so exhausted after a while.

Because theres no substance here. Just words going round

in circles. No food for the ego. But thats the only way I

can honestly answer your question, or any question. But

when those questions fall away, so does the confusion sur-

rounding these words. And then these words are heard in

absolute clarity, and its all over.

Q. Repeat that.

(Laughter)

Which bit?

Q. at last bit.

Ive forgotten!

(Laughter)

So, the not understandingis it! ats the short way of say-

ing it. It cannot be understood. All I was left with, afteryears of trying to understand this, was the not under-

standing, was the unknown. And the unknown cannot be

known. So thats where all these words are trying to point

to, really: the unknown. And yet the words arent really


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tryingto do anything. ey are just sounds. ese sounds

are as meaningful as the sound of the train going past out-

side. ey are just sounds. A dog barks, a bird tweets, andthis organism makes these sounds that youre hearing now.

Its a dog barking, its a bird tweeting. Its Oneness. Oneness

sharing with itself. And thats all thats happening here. Or

anywhere really. Its Oneness meeting itself everywhere.

Seeing through different eyes. Hearing through different

ears. Delighting in its infinite expressions.

Q. And even those different eyes arent really different?

Its all One. And with that, this whole idea of personal

attainment, of getting something that others have, that

whole thing falls away, because its seen to be an illusion.

If there is only Oneness meeting itself everywhere, thenthat doesnt leave any room for this whole Im enlightened,

youre not thing.

Q. Actually, that doesnt interest me anymore, the notion

of personal enlightenment. What seems to interest me is

not having this sense of a burden anymore, this sense of

limitation.

So where is the burden now?

(Pause)

Q. I dont know.

ats because its not there. is search is a search for the

end of a burden that was never there!


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Q. But what sees it as a burden? ese words are so

meaningless when you try and apply them to anything.

What is it that is burdened by what?

e burden is the sense of being a separate self, a separate

person. at is the burden. And yet on investigation, the

separate person is not there.

Q. Do we choose to do that? Do we choose to be indi-

viduals?

If we knew what we were doing, we wouldnt do it. If we

had the choice, we wouldnt choose to be individuals.

Q. But we couldnt notbe individuals either, could we?

You seem to imply there is something wrong with that?

No, youre implying that! eres nothing wrong with it.

Q. But you seemed to imply just then that we could have

chosen differently?

When the sense of being a separate person is seen through,

the idea that anything could have been different falls away

as well. at it could have been otherwise. Because this is all

there is. Undeniably. And in the obviousness and simplicity

of that, its seen that for this to be, that whole thing had

to happen as well. e past, whatever happened, it couldnt

have been otherwise. And thats the end of choice.

Until then, there will appear to be choice. ere appears to

be choice until it is seen in clarity that there is no choice

and that there never was!


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Q. So was there really a past? Apart from the story?

Where is the past now?

Q. So are you saying no?

Im saying where is it now? Its a thought. Its a memory

arising, or not. When its not there, there is no past.

Q. Its hard for people to remember very strong or

traumatic experiences that happened in the past. But

recently, whats been happening to me, is a questioning

about the word yesterday. I sometimes think, what

does that even mean? Yesterday? Where is it? I supposethat in that moment, Im realising that yesterday isnt a

thing.

Yesterday happens now.

Q. I mean there wasnt even a yesterday. Wednesday,

what does that mean? Friday, what does that mean?

Even five minutes ago.

Q. Yes.

Five seconds ago.

Q. Well, thats too recent for me!

Youll have to work your way up to five seconds!


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(Laughter)

Q. Its very strange.

Its always gone. e worst thing that happened, its gone.

Its always gone. ats the freedom of it. e very worst

thing that ever happened has always gone.

Q. Ah, but the worst thing to happen is yet to come!

(Laughter)

Touch!

e suffering comes from trying to cling on, from tryingto grasp the past. is is me, this is who I am, this is what

Ive done. Its all gone. Its all just a thought, arising now.

All your achievements, everything youve ever done, all the

people youve ever met, its all a thought. ats how pre-

cious it is. ats how fragile it all is. ats how evanescent

it all is.

Q. Physiologically, its interesting, these thoughts can

create strange reactions in our bodies. oughts almost

become solidified. Memories of the past arent neces-

sarilyjustideas. ere can be a real physical sense with

strong physiological responses. Sometimes its hard to

see that itsjusta thought.

Yes, it doesnt feel like just a thought.

Q. Yes, thoughts have that reality.


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Oh absolutely. ey appear to. But ultimately, they are only

thoughts. at doesnt mean that to a person they cant feel

very real. Of course they can feel real. But when its seenthat its just a thought, it loses all of its heaviness, all of

its solidity, and all those physiological responses go too.

It all starts to feel like a dream. And thats not just poetic

language. ats what it actually feels like. It all feels like a

dream.

Q. Yes, its all quite dreamlike. Its really mysterious

actually.

It is.

Q. And yet, it has this impact. Its like, now. Where is

now? We talk about the power of now, and resting inthe now, and becoming present. But even the present,

I mean, its very light and mysterious. And then theres

this idea of a future. Where is that? Where is the future?

And yet there seems to be some sort of continuity. Some-

thing is continuing and yet, when you really look, you

cant find anything.

Its the absolute mystery of it. Nothing is happening, and

yet in that, there is the appearance of the character, the

me, who lives his life and who apparently has a past and a

future. And that plays out in the mystery. Its all the mys-

tery unfolding. From the very beginning there has only

ever been this. Ungraspable. Indefinable. Its always beenthe case.

And yet we get so lost in our stories, in our attempts to

get this, in our search for enlightenment and liberation


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and awakening and our spiritual practices. But it all played

itself out, as it had to. And evensayingall of this, its all part

of the dream. e person who did all of those things, theperson who was born, where is he? Where is birth, where is

death? A moment before death, where is death? ere is no

death. ere is no birth. ere is only aliveness. Only this

whatever this is.

Q. In these appearances, something is happening. ey

are only actually happening here, wherever that here is.

Nothing is happening anywhere else.

Its all happening here.

Q. And thinking, its always linked with tomorrow, with

whats going to happen, with who Im going to become.

eres always some problem to work out. And there

seems to be a past that I can go to. I can regret some-

thing, or be nostalgic, or wish Id done something differ-

ently. And all of that is like another sort of reality that

kind of takes me away from this.

Even the idea that there is another reality, its a thought

arising now, arising here, arising in this reality. ere is no

other reality. ere is no this and everything else. ats

the last piece of duality to fall away.

Q. So its just another idea.

Yes, there is only the unknowable thisness. And its already

complete.


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Q. And you were saying before about unpleasant experi-

ences. You were talking about energy. ere is just this

energy, but it seems that if something is unpleasant,thats an interpretation, a narrowing down of experi-

ence. But if there wasnt that interpretation, it would just

be whatever it is.

Which it is. Yes, to the separate person, there can be an

unpleasant experience. What it actually is, is the mystery

unfolding, right before your eyes. Its the Universe happen-

ing. Its the Big Bang.

Because theres nothing out there, this is everything. So

whats happening here is the Universe. is is all thats

going on, its creation and destruction, its the Garden of

Eden and the Apocalypse all rolled into one. Its astonish-ing whats happening here.

Q. So the labelling pleasant or unpleasant its the

mind trying to know again. It needs to know. And the

needing to know means that seeing things as they are, in

their freshness, in their aliveness, gets missed.

e seeing of this destroys the knowledge. It puts an end

to all of that confusion. To the mind that is terrifying. e

mind wants to control.

Seeing this is the end of control. e mind can feel very

vulnerable here.

Q. So if Im bored, thats the mind knowing something.

e minds getting to know about boredom.


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Yes. e boredom is the knowledge. I know. Its boring.

Q. Because I know what it is.

Yes. It all comes down to that. Nothing is boring. Its not

possible. Its too alive to be boring.

Q. Knowing that you know nothing can be quite scary.

Presumably knowing that you know nothing, without

the mind being involved, could be totally freeing.

Well, I know nothing, and I dont know it! eres nothing

to know. Although, there is lots of knowledge out there in

the world. But its just mind-stuff. Just concepts.

is is too obvious to be known. Its happening now. Whats

happening cannot be captured by thought. And either you

know that or you dont know it, but either way it doesnt

matter!

Q. Im getting an analogy with another dimension.

Uh-oh!

(Laughter)

Q. It seems to me that the self telling its stories, is all

seamlessly interwoven with what is. So in that way, it

seems that there are other dimensions beyond the third

one, which intersect with the others. I know it sounds


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very science fiction, but it feels to me a bit like that, just

as an analogy.

ere are no dimensions. ats the mind again, separating.

One dimension, two dimensions, three. No, its all One-

ness. Its wholeness. In wholeness there are no dimensions.

No separation. ose are just theories.

Q. Its the mind trying to understand something with an

analogy, isnt it?

Yes. You could say that to a separate person there appears

to be time and space. at is the separate person, the idea

of time and space. e idea of things in a world. So you

could say that in this arises the idea of dimensions, the idea

of time and space, the idea of a person. Everything is justan idea.

In this, arises the idea of the dimensions of time and space,

the idea of two, three, four, five, six, seven dimensions and

beyond. So you could say that this is the Dimension that

allows all dimensions. But I wont say that!

Ultimately, there are no separate dimensions. ats the

mind cutting this up, trying to understand it, trying to get

somewhere. Oneness isnt another dimension. Its the only

dimension. Without a second.

Q. What we all experience, the me-ing and the be-ing,is seemingly a dual state, where we seem to have lost

ourselves naturally. e separated self, the thing that

identifies with control and choice, it seems like a ghost

in the machine, like another dimension that intersects


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the real one, which is the Oneness.

It thinks that its intersecting it. Its not really doing any-thing. e separate self is doing nothing.

Q. Because its a dream.

Yes, it thinks that its in control. But its doing nothing. It

arises as a thought. e world of thought is the world of dual-

ity. ings separate from other things. Dimensions separate

from other dimensions. It thinks that there is the dimen-

sion of the small self, and the dimension of the Big Self. e

dimension of me, and the dimension of Oneness. But thought

has created that. And thought is always dualistic.

Q. And its always trying to be the master.

Yes. ere is only Oneness. Only the mystery. It cannot

be known. e whole question of dimensions, it falls away

when its seen that this separate self is just a story, an illu-

sion. All these theories and analogies go with it. All the

theories of mankind go with it. No theory in the world can

capture this. All the teachings of man cannot touch this.

So if theres two or two million dimensions, its all just

mind stuff. ere are no dimensions, theres just this. Just

whats happening. And it cannot be known. And its where

we always are.

Q. e mind is so tricky isnt it!

Yes, its a naughty little boy.

(Laughter)


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Q. You get a glimpse of resonance, and it seamlessly

takes you on a little detour, and kids you that its about

what you just experienced. Its so tricky.

Yes, its amazing.

Q. And theres nothing we can do.

Its astonishing, how clever it is. How subtle it can get. How

subtle that grasping can get. And as it gets more and more

desperate, it gets more and more subtle.

Q. A mind harried by thought, its got no alternative butto seek refuge. In a sense the seeking is inevitable.

ats thegame the mind plays. Seeking Oneness. Seeking

refuge. It plays itself out.

Q. So many teachers seem to encourage that.

But we listen to them. We wantsomething from them. You

see, out of our need, we create them. Its the student here

who creates the guru over there. When theres no student

over here, theres no gurus anymore. eres no need for

them. en, in a sense, everythingbecomes the guru. is

is expressing itself everywhere. e chair is doing it. efloor, the ceiling, the lights. Everything is teaching. e

chair is teaching. e ceiling is teaching. e heart beating

is teaching.


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So really, these teachers do nothing. ey are innocent.

ey dont really encourage anything. We go to these

teachers, and we are encouraged by them. When theresno need to be encouraged anymore, that whole thing falls

away, never to return. And then you will never listen to a

teacher ever again. You will stand alone but never lonely

- in this dream world, and life, as it is, will be enough. at

is the freedom from the spiritual search.

Q. e fly in the ointment, is that those conditions cant

be brought about, can they?

Not by you.

Q. And yet thats a very subtle thing.

Its very, very subtle. And very, very obvious when its seen.

Q. And of course in the world of time and space, cause

and effect, its very difficult to let go of the seeking.

Yes, the mind is afraid of letting go. But really, you dont

need to let go of anything.

Without you, it all continues to function. Functioning in

the world continues. If someone asks you your name, your

name is spoken. at functioning does not cease. e story

of cause and effect, and time and place and name, it goes

on.

Life never needed you in the first place. ere is nothing to

lose, so there is nothing to fear.


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Q. But in a way, you dont know anything about what

happened to stopyoursearch?

All I know is that the search ended in disappointment

and frustration. And it was in the midst of that, that it all

unravelled.

Q. But in a sense, so-called awakening is the biggest dis-

appointment of all?

To the mind that wants something from it!

Q. (Chuckles)Yes.

It leaves you with nothing. And in that nothing, everything

is revealed. Because there is no idea of what it is. Every-thing presents itself, and its always new, and its never

known. Nothing can be known about this. And thats the

beauty of it.

is isnt a teaching. Its a sharing. A description. Not a

prescription. Not telling you what to do. at gets so dull,

being told what to do!

Q. Descriptions can get dull too!

Yes, yes they can!

Q. Prescriptions that worked wouldnt be dull.

If they worked, that would be great. Have you found one

thats worked for you?


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(Pause)

Q. I dont even know.

So this whole thing ends in that not knowing. Not knowing

what the hell is going on. Its explosively liberating. Its like

anarchy. Spiritual anarchy. No students, no teachers.

Q. So whatever happens, happens. And that which allows

liberation, nobody seems to know anything about that.

Its always afterthe fact that they start speaking about it.

Eckhart Tolle and Byron Katie for example.

Yes, and it didnt happen to them. It was the them that

fell away! For me, to say that something happened to me,

feels like a lie. It all just falls away, when its ready, and nota moment before. And theres nopointat which this hap-

pens, really. Its always falling away. Everythings always

falling. Nothing to grasp onto. A freefall into unity.

Q. Its not a permanent state, is it? ats what we are

looking for. e self always wants things to be perma-

nent. It wants everything on its own terms. It wants to

experience something beyond me. e perfect condi-

tions, the perfect happiness.

Its a big list!

Q. And thinking is getting a bit of a bad reputation isnt

it? ere is an element in some spiritual teachings about

thinking, that its somehow bad. To me, its not thinking


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thats the issue. Its just another happening, another aris-

ing. Its the identification with thinking. Whatever this

grasping is, thats the issue, not thoughts in themselves.oughts also can be seen to be very transparent and

light, appearing from nowhere and going nowhere. And

in that space, they dont have a strong reactive effect. Its

when thought is identified with me, thats very differ-

ent from thoughts just appearing and disappearing. So

its the identification.

Yes. Its the me.My thoughts.

Q.My feelings, my hearing, my seeing, my doing.

Yes. ats it. We have the idea that everything in here is

mine, and everything out there is not mine. Actuallynoneof it is yours. It just arises in aliveness, in freedom. And its

the grasping, its the identity, the identification, the idea of

a thinker of thoughts, thats the illusion. Nobody is doing

it. You cannot even choose your next thought.

(Pause)

Q. Can you see your present thoughts?

Even the idea of a present thought isjust another thought.

Another word for Oneness is Presence. Everything arises

in Presence. All thoughts arise in that.

Q. I find myself trying to catch a thought.


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Good luck!

(Laughter)

Q. Well, I think that if I caught the thought I could see it

properly.

You cannot catch a thought. You cant catch a cloud. You

cant catch a wave.

Q. ere is a Buddhist Sutra on that. Its all fleeting.

ere one minute and gone the next.

Yes, everything is changing, so nothing can be yours. Not

even a thought. e most intensely personal thought is

not even yours! e breathing isnt yours. e heart beat-

ing isnt yours. Its all just happening. Spontaneously. Andits already liberated. ats the relief from the burden of

having to do, having to choose. Its doing itself. Its already

being done. And the mind goes If I let go of control, if I

let go of choice, Ill stop breathing! Or Ill just sit and do

nothing all day. In the absence of you, everything happens,

everything gets done. ere is natural, intelligent function-

ing. And its always been that way. Weve just overlaid it

with the story Im doing it,Im doing it,Im doing it.

And occasionally in our lives things happen that we think

are somehow beyond us. Occasionally we admit that there

are some things we arent in control of. Occasionally we

will allow that.

Q. e irony is that when we totally buy our story, we

become depressed


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And do nothing!

Q. Yes. We do that anyway.

So theres nothing to be afraid of.

Q. But its not true that we buy our story is it? I mean,

that we choose to?

In the dream, I am a separate person with a story. So in the

dream, yes, we buy into our stories. Or we think we do.

Q. It couldnt be otherwise. So theres no volition. Words

seem to confuse this issue.

is cant be expressed. eres no pure expression of this.

Every expression is inherently dualistic. You cant have a

nondual expression of nonduality. eres no such thing.

So we have to use the words of duality here. If youre look-

ing for clarity in the words, youll be disappointed. If youre

looking to use duality to escape from duality, youll be

going round in circles.

Its notthat there is no choice. Its notthat there is choice,

either. But if we use words, were immediately into the is

there choice or not? game. Back and forth. And were com-

pletely missing the point. e point is not to understandthis intellectually. e point is a clearseeingof this.

And the mind will always struggle with this. So let it! Let it

struggle! Whats wrong with a bit of struggling? We dont


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have to make the struggling into the enemy. Weve been

trying for so long to end the struggle, and in doing so, fuel-

ling the struggle.

And in the final analysis, the struggle isnt even there. Its

just a thought, arising now.

Q. What is it that does this?

Nothing is doing this. To the mind, something must be

doing this. Its the only way it can think about this. e

mind is lost in the world of things, in the world of intellec-

tual understanding and confusion. Actually, not knowing,

the last place the mind wants to go, is very alive. Its thealiveness the mind could never see. e mind thinks it can

reach aliveness through getting an answer to its questions.

Actually, the not knowing is incredibly alive. And its where

we always are. Right at the heart of the mystery of it all.

Aliveness cannot be known. If it could be known, it

wouldnt be aliveness. It would be a dead thing. So the free-

dom is in the notunderstanding, the notknowing, and the

sinking into openness. And no words can take you there,

if you are looking to be taken there! Because its all thats

happening. Its sitting on the chair. Its breathing. Its the

heart beating.

Enlightenment is sitting on the chair. Right now. Its

breathing, right now. Its the heart beating, right now. So

ordinary. Its the last thing you ever expected.


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Q. Its also standing up from the chair.

Yes, but right now theres sitting. e last thing we everexpected.

Q. (Chuckles) So ordinary.

Yes.

Q. Extraordinary.

at too.

(Pause)

Q. I was lost in Budapest the other day. I stopped in alittle hairdressers, I needed a haircut at the time you see.

ere was a girl in there, she was so sweet, she didnt

speak any English and I didnt speak any Hungarian. She

gave me this terrible haircut, but she was so sweet and

was so happy with what shed done.

(Pause)

Is that the story? We were waiting for the punch line!

(Laughter)

Has anyone else got a completely pointless story?

(Laughter)

Q. Well, the punch line was that there was a beautiful

innocence to it all, and it had nothing to do with any-

thing.


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Oh yes, thats the beauty of it. Its completely free. Its

revealed in haircuts!

(Laughter)

In Budapest!

(Laughter)


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DIALOGUE TWO

The Myth of Mind

Groping after what is empty and chasing echoes

will only fatigue the mind and spirit.

Beyond awakening from a dream,

and then going beyond this awakening,

what remains?

Deshan


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Part One

What were talking about today is the possibility that the

endless seeking of the mind, its incessant search forsome-

thing more, can come to an end.

And thats not something the mind wants to hear, because

the mind doesnt really want to give up its seeking. Because

in seeking, the mind is keeping itself alive. And so the endof seeking is the last thing the mind really wants, because

to the mind, the end of seeking is death! e end of seeking

doesnt give it anything to do, and the mind always seems

to want something to do.

So what were talking about today might frustrate themind. In these few hours were not going to be giving the

mind anything to do, although it will try, it always does!

And thats fine, thats absolutely appropriate, thats what

the mind is supposed to do. Weve been trying to fightthe

mind for so long, and it hasnt worked.

So this whole spiritual search and really the spiritualsearch is just an extension of a lifetimes search for some-

thing more rests on the assumption that there is so

Revelation of Oneness

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Transcript of Revelation of Oneness