Reflections on Philosophy Camp:€¦ · Web viewReflections on Philosophy Camp: My process of...
Transcript of Reflections on Philosophy Camp:€¦ · Web viewReflections on Philosophy Camp: My process of...
Reflections on Philosophy Camp:
My process of discovery, unlearning, and recovering the sacred in self and community
Jillian Stein
What is rooted is easy to nourish.What is recent is easy to correct.What is brittle is easy to break.What is small is easy to scatter.
Prevent trouble before it arises.Put things in order before they exist.
The giant pine treegrows from a tiny sprout.
The journey of a thousand milesstarts from beneath your feet.
Rushing into action, you fail.Trying to grasp things, you lose them.
Forcing a project to completion,you ruin what was almost ripe.
Therefore the Master takes actionby letting things take their course.
He remains as calmat the end as at the beginning.
He has nothing,thus has nothing to lose.
What he desires is non-desire;what he learns is to unlearn.
He simply reminds peopleof who they have always been.
He cares about nothing but the Tao.Thus he can care for all things.
-Lao Tzu
Jill SteinJuly 9, 2011
2
Reflections on Lives Worth Living, 2011
I have recently been reading about the indigenous Mayan
cultures in Guatemala, and came across some material that
resonated with me as I try to put my thoughts and experiences
regarding Philosophy Camp to paper. There are few written
texts describing Mayan traditions and ways of life, and this is not
by accident. The Mayan people know that people write things
down, not so much to remember them, but to ensure they don’t
have to. To forget something is to dishonor it, and let it die.
Therefore, anything worth remembering was never committed to
writing. Instead, a rich and nuanced oral tradition flourished,
and perhaps is part of the reason why the Guatemalan culture
has maintained a real magical and sacred quality to it. The
spoken word contains depths that the written word simply
cannot capture. It also inherently involves a community; the
company of others, the sharing of stories (and often food), voices
raised in laughter or song, heartbreak and heroism, the deep
listening to your friends and neighbors, and the recalling your
own tales are all elements of a rich oral tradition. How do you
begin to capture these experiences on paper? How can words
Jill SteinJuly 9, 2011
3flat on a page describe the depths that they touched your soul?
Ultimately, one must try to do so. It is important because others
in the world need to know that these places and experiences
exist and are possible to have for themselves and their
communities. It is important to share things with a soul in as
many mediums as possible. It is also necessary because while
the writing process may filter out some of the magic and mystery
and spontaneity of a memory, it also concentrates it and forces
the writer to reflect in a more deliberate and focused way. This
is where I find myself now, with two years and countless
moments spent within the special fold of Philosophy Camp.
There are so many essays for me to write regarding my
two-year love affair with the course Lives Worth Living:
Questions of Self, Vocation, and Community, and perhaps I will
write them all one day. I could fill pages about its origins, The
Danish Folk School tradition, the Reggio-Emilia preschools, and
the Highlander Folk School. I have done this, in part, in other
courses and will continue to seek knowledge on how these
educational models have crafted real social change, one student
at a time. Singing, dancing, and arts and crafts are
acknowledged as a necessary part of an education. At Philosophy
Jill SteinJuly 9, 2011
4Camp, the collaborative use of the kitchen space and food
preparation, along with the group meals, is a major source of
enriched learning during the course. There are no tests, the
teachers live with the students, and each day adds another layer
of reflection on what a life worth living means to the community.
The environmental setting is seen as the third teacher, and I am
certain that the prairie and residential experience at Shalom Hill
Farms is perhaps the most powerful influence for creating the
community connection found at Philosophy Camp. The beautiful
scenery also gives people the opportunity to experience solitude
in nature, providing another avenue towards sensory encounters
and meditative reflection.
Since The Long Haul was first given to me before my first
experience as a Philosophy Camp student, I have been
encouraged by the story and leadership of Myles Horton and saw
Highlander as a representation of social justice that made sense
to me, because it is about people and not abstract social ills.
Myles Horton is pure inspiration for me; a brilliant leader who
was able to stay true to his roots, not letting himself get swayed
by the resources and prestige of powerful institutions and
dedicating his life to giving disenfranchised people their own
Jill SteinJuly 9, 2011
5voices back. He didn’t say, “We are going to end segregation,”
but he invited white people and Black people together into the
kind of environment that would allow real conversations to flow.
Out of those conversations came a sense of purpose and a
community of support that allowed a shift in their perspective
and a newfound confidence to create change at home. Myles
Horton didn’t have an agenda or proposed outcomes, but trusted
that the process of people sharing spaces and sharing stories
would provide the kind of reflection that makes people unable to
accommodate their oppressive conditions any longer. I think this
largely has to do with being given a sense of worth and value,
and feeling respected for one’s ideas and life experiences.
Philosophy Camp does this for people, within the storycircles
especially, but the overall notion of nearly unconditional
acceptance invites people to let down their guards and see
themselves as people with real knowledge and contributions to
give back to their communities.
I connect with Myles Horton’s philosophy of social change
because emerges from a realization of the whole person, not
necessarily the issues at hand. This makes it timelessly relevant.
Unlike a lot of social movement approaches, I do not see
Jill SteinJuly 9, 2011
6Horton’s as trying to assemble a faceless army to grind change
out through sheer numbers and force of will. Horton’s kind of
education, which is inherently process-focused rather than
outcome-driven, is much more radical because it restores dignity
to the everyday lived experience. This restoration leads to a
sense of self that can navigate the complex world with a kind of
authenticity that will naturally lead towards a life worth living,
and the kinds of social and moral choices that accompany that.
Philosophy Camp does not indoctrinate its students with any one
viewpoint or dogma, but trusts that each person has the capacity
to decide for him or herself what is right and wrong, valuable
and empty. This kind of respect takes people off guard at the
beginning, I think, because we are used to being told how to
think, what hoops to jump through to succeed, who to emulate,
and what to change about ourselves. The single biggest
realization for me at Philosophy Camp this year was that the
only way I would ever become the kind of person I hoped to
become was if I stopped trying to be just like the people I
admired and learned instead how to be me. It was like the story
Marcelle told about the Israeli king Zusya, and how the hardest
question God would ask him once he had died was not if he had
Jill SteinJuly 9, 2011
7been Moses or any other great man, but if he had been Zusya.
When I observed in admiration the incredible leadership
happening within the instructor team, I knew that I was never
going to be John, Lynn, Nance, or Peter. Instead of being
discouraged, I was able to look past what I am not and began to
imagine what I already am. I could integrate within myself the
qualities I admired in others, but I was ultimately only going to
be Jill, so what does that look like? I appreciate that each of the
Danish Folk Schools are different due to their unique leadership
and what kinds of students they attract. It gives me great hope
that even though I am not John, Lynn, Nance, or Peter, I could
still be a fundamental part of Philosophy Camp, a spin-off of it,
or whatever organization or community I become a part of.
I could absolutely speak at length about the Learning
Circle process, as both the apparent and subtle profoundness of
Circles strikes me deeper each time I participate. On the surface
level, I deeply enjoy the quietness and pace of the circle. I notice
how often I feel overwhelmed within group situations when
everyone is talking over one another and uneasy in silence.
Philosophy Camp has helped me be comfortable in silence with
others. I remember the first time I sat down with John and Lynn
Jill SteinJuly 9, 2011
8in the spring of 2010 at a Chinese restaurant in Dinkytown. They
did not fill the space with empty words, but relaxed into the slow
pace of a conversation they had most certainly had many times
before with worried and questioning potential campers. I was
not so comfortable, though, with these extended silences. I
fidgeted and talked more than I wanted to without really saying
anything. This is a pattern I now can see and begin to break
after spending time with those involved in the course. I think
this comfort in collective quietness represents many attributes I
value, such as patience, deep listening, and intentionality, but
what strikes me the most is respect, especially in relationship to
time. I believe many people grow up becoming oriented to time
in terms of limitations and shortages. “There’s never enough
hours in the days,” “Use your time wisely,” or “Don’t waste my
time.” This last one has always especially effected me. I’ve
always felt nervous and a heightened awareness not to waste
someone’s time, especially older people whom I admire, such as
the instruction team at Philosophy Camp, or in a classroom full
of other students. The storycircles have helped me make peace
with this societal pressure, find my authentic voice easier and
with more confidence, and realize that I must submit to time,
Jill SteinJuly 9, 2011
9and not aim to control, manipulate, or hoard it. Only then can I
experience the present moment and understand that each
minute, hour, and day are infinite, whole, and full of endless
possibilities.
I think this realization goes beyond the personal
relationship with time and living in the present moment. It also
has huge implications on how leadership can be approached,
how companies, schools, and even families can be run. When a
leader is willing to break from the schedule, and take the time to
allow other people’s voices to be heard, it sends a deep message
that everyone is respected for their needs and contributions to
the community. I was so impressed how the instruction team
facilitated the community meeting regarding the schedule
changes, and that example will be something I carry with me to
all groups I become a part of in my life. When leadership seems
so transparent and seamless as it does at Philosophy Camp, I
think it become easy for the students not to realize how much
more effort it takes to accomplish this than does the usual
dictatorial forms of leadership they usually find at the University
or their jobs, or perhaps even within their families. I get
frustrated when I try to explain this process to people, and they
Jill SteinJuly 9, 2011
10say, “Oh, that sound great, but there just really isn’t time for
that in the real world.” In my experience, so many of the
misunderstandings, the repressed feelings, and the stalemates
that happen within groups stems from the lack of real
communication and the need to save time. Sometimes this might
stem from a power-hoarding leader, but I think it often is a more
common and benign symptom of the fact that people have not
seen real democracy played out before, and therefore do not
know how to facilitate it or how to ask for it. Exposing people to
grassroots democratic processes forever changes the
possibilities of how conflict can be resolved, decisions can be
made, and groups can be organized. As the citizens of this
country increasingly question how our government and
institutional systems are designed and managed, these
experiences can help uncover the roots of our founding
democracy and present a way to approach the future. I think our
systems now treat the public with the same paternalistic
condescension that children often receive; we do not know
enough and are not smart enough to govern ourselves and make
informed choices. With time, this attitude becomes believed and
accepted into the social consciousness, and we lose our will and
Jill SteinJuly 9, 2011
11know-how to participate. Philosophy Camp has helped restore
my belief that each person does have leadership qualities, that
they do have the knowledge and experience and desire to
participate, and that a community or society is false if it is not
taking the voices of its citizens into account and if it regularly
makes decisions that benefit some at the expense of others.
I do not want my Philosophy Camp experiences to end; I
need to keep learning and participating in democratic education
and intentional community settings. My eyes are opened—I can’t
go back to accepting the status quo in institutions and
organizations. Where will I end up next? I feel right as I am
finishing this round of higher education, I am just discovering
the things I want to really dig into and study. I want to keep
learning more about the Danish Folk School movement, visit
them, and advocate for their adoption in the United States. I
want to study the Reggio Emilia approach, and make deeper
connections to American progressive education theory,
pragmatist philosophies, and constructivism. I want to study
Highlander in the contexts of social justice, adult transformative
education, and radical education theory. I have always been
intimidated by traditional philosophy, but having had The
Jill SteinJuly 9, 2011
12Republic be made accessible to me, I am open and curious to
delve into more philosophical texts and feel more confident that
I have opinions of worth on their subjects. I have been reading
more books on the circle process, and will continue to hone the
craft of facilitating circles. It is unclear where I will put these
skills to use, but I plan to seek out opportunities to spread
circles to different groups. I will soon begin volunteering with
the Seward Neighborhood Group’s Restorative Justice initiative,
which I believe will be an excellent place for circles. I will use
them in Guatemala with my students as we discuss our
experiences in a foreign culture and land. In my personal life, I
want to bring the circle qualities of equality and deep listening
to my relationships.
We live in a society where the motto seems to be, “If you
can’t prove it, it didn’t happen.” Programs are only as valuable
as their evaluation methods and expected results demonstrate
them to be, and it is difficult to quantify, or even adequately
qualify, an experience that claims no uniform developmental
outcomes. Philosophy Camp is going to be a unique experience
for every person, and seeds planted there may unexpectedly
sprout long after the end of the course. If I were to have a large
Jill SteinJuly 9, 2011
13project to do (such as a thesis or dissertation), I might take
advantage of the fact that Philosophy Camp just celebrated its
10th anniversary. I might do in-depth interviews with past
participants, fellows, and the instructors to see how the
experience has impacted their lives and weave together the
common themes to demonstrate the significance of a democratic
residential folk school education. I am looking around, doing bits
of inquiry and research, and there are these kinds of discussions,
programs, and schools bubbling up around the world. I see the
need for documentation of the contributions that the course has
made to people’s lives, in hopes that it will further these kind of
experiences elsewhere. I don’t want to intrude on the sacredness
of P Camp, I would protect it with all my power, but I also want
to show it off to the world as a beacon of hope for how to
rediscover lives worth living.
I have never felt like I have “what it takes” to go on further
with my education, to seek the PhD level, but I am also
rethinking this recently. I have seen and experienced how
hungry students are for this kind of education and I want to be a
part of providing it, but there is still a great deal for me to learn
about the foundations and history behind this kind of learning. I
Jill SteinJuly 9, 2011
14am a lifelong learner; I dearly love to learn. I know that this is
not confined in the least to the institutional walls of higher
education, and that every moment is an opportunity to grow and
shift in the way I perceive truth in the world. I am starting to
consider my abilities to navigate and flow between multiple
worlds as an advantage, rather than a sign of listlessness or an
inability to commit and focus on one thing. I have struggled with
my tendencies to be a ‘generalist’ rather than a ‘specialist’ in a
society that seems to favor the specialist mentality. I used to be
excited and proud of my ‘Renaissance Woman’ experiences, but
over the past few years I feel as though I got left in the dust
while everyone else found a niche, while I continued to search
and explore. At Philosophy Camp, it was one of the first times
since childhood that I felt like my contributions were enough just
as they were, and therefore I was enough just as I am. Coming
back as an apprentice, I was able to reflect and act on this in an
even deeper way. Not having a specific job description or
required skills or stated expectations, I was able to draw the
conclusion that I was chosen for the whole of who I am, and not
for any one specific reason. Therefore, my real job was to be the
most authentic representation of myself that I could be, the
Jill SteinJuly 9, 2011
15positive and the negative, the learned and the uninformed sides
of me. This level of honesty is both liberating and deeply
humbling.
I am uncertain of what my next chapter in life will bring
me, but I am taking to heart the Philosophy Camp lessons I’ve
learned in letting things naturally unfold, and have almost let go
of the anxiety of the unknown and instead embraced the mystery
of my future. I believe finding Philosophy Camp was a major
piece of my destiny, and the course of my life will be forever
impacted by my experiences as a student and an apprentice. I
am filled with such gratitude for the instructor team, and every
student and fellow and visitor that contributed to my learning
and growth. I am reminded of the Four Immutable Laws that
state,
Whoever is present are the right people.Whoever is present are the right people.Whenever it begins is the right time.Whenever it begins is the right time.Whatever happens is the only thing that could have happened.Whatever happens is the only thing that could have happened.When it’s over it’s over.When it’s over it’s over.
Philosophy Camp will never truly be over for me, as I will
carry it in my heart and spread its spirit as I uncover what lies
ahead of me.