Reading Body Language

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IntroBy a man's fingernails, by his coat-sleeve, by his boots, by his trouser-knees, by the calluses of his forefinger and thumb, by his expression, by his shirt-cuffs, by his movements- by each of these things a man's calling is plainly revealed. That all united should fail to enlighten the competent enquirer in any case is almost inconceivable.

SHERLOCK HOLMES, 1892

Every day people around you people are communicating their true thoughts and feelings without ever saying a word. The ability to work out what is really happening with a person is simple - not easy, but simple. It's about matching what you see and hear in the environment in which it all happens and drawing probable conclusions. Most people, however, only see the things they think they are seeing. This is contrary to the fact that non-verbal communication makes up 55% of what our words convey every day. The remaining percentages are 7% vocabulary and 38% vocal (tone of voice, inflection, and other sounds). This is why it is difficult to tell when non-familiar strangers are being dishonest with us when we cannot see their body language. The human body reveals what people’s real thoughts are even when their words say otherwise!

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Commercialization of Body LanguageSilent movie actors like Charlie Chaplin were the pioneers ofbody language skills, as this was the only means of communicationavailable on the screen. Each actor's skill was classed asgood or bad by the extent to which he could use gestures andbody signals to communicate to the audience. When talkingfilms became popular and less emphasis was placed on thenon-verbal aspects of acting, many silent movie actors fadedinto obscurity and only those with good verbal and non-verbalskills survived.

As far as the academic study of body language goes,perhaps the most influential pre-twentieth-century work wasCharles Darwin's The Expression of the Emotions in Man andAnimals, published in 1872, but this work tended to be readmainly by academics. However, it spawned the modern studiesof facial expressions and body language, and many ofDarwin's ideas and observations have since been validated byresearchers around the world. Since that time, researchers havenoted and recorded almost a million non-verbal cues andsignals.

By studying the language of the body, individuals are able to decipher what others are not telling them which could change the world!

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Smiling and laughing are universally considered to be signals that show a person is happy. We cry at birth, begin smiling at five weeks and laughing starts between the fourth and fifth months. Babies quickly learn that crying gets our attention -and that smiling keeps us there. In humans, smiling tells another person you are non-threatening and asks them to accept you on a personal level. Lack of smiling explains why many dominant individuals, such as Vladimir Putin, James Cagney, Clint Eastwood, Margaret Thatcher and Charles Bronson, always seem to look grumpy or aggressive and are rarely seen smiling - they simply don't want to appear in any way submissive. And research in courtrooms shows that an apology offered with a smile incurs a lesser penalty than an apology without one. Click below for more information on how others cannot fool you any longer.

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The Eyes Have It Those Lips Drive Me Wild A kiss is a lovely trick

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Exasperation: A familiar sign of exasperation, the eyes are turned heavenward, as though invoking divine assistance.

Anxiety: Eyebrows raised and furrowed is an instinctive response to extreme anxiety. It is a natural expression, common to all cultures.

Winking: A wink has various meanings, from sexual approval by a potential partner, to collusion between two people in the know.

Skepticism: Raising just one eyebrow is a common gesture of disbelief. The two sides of the face are at odds, registering a state of confusion.

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Raspberry: Children the world over stick their tongue out as a rude gesture—perhaps their first insult.

I Don’t Know: This gesture involves pulling down the corners of the mouth–a facial equivalent to shrugging the shoulders.

Be Quiet: An easily recognized symbol of silence, the lips are sealed.

Anger: Biting one’s lower lip while shaking one’s head from side to side shows barely contained anger.

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Cheek Kiss: This is a friendly gesture practiced in the West, in which both people kiss each other on both cheeks.

Foot Kiss: A gesture symbolizing humility and respect, performed by the Pope during Holy Week.

Hand Kiss: This gesture is a symbol of respect, and was once commonly performed by a man when greeting a woman.

Blowing A Kiss: A symbol of love, often from a mother to a child, or to a friend too distant to embrace.

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The hands have been the most important tools in human evolution and there are more connections between the brain and the hands than between any other body parts. Few people ever consider how their hands behave or the way they shake hands when they meet someone. Yet those first five to seven pumps establish whether dominance, submission or power plays will take place. Throughout history, the open palm has been associated with truth, honesty, allegiance and submission. Many oaths are still taken with the palm of the hand over the heart, and the palm is held in the air when somebody is giving evidence in a court of law; the Bible is held in the left hand and the right palm held up for the members of the court to view. One of the most valuable clues to discovering whether someone is being open and honest - or not - is to watch for palm displays. Just as a dog will expose its throat to show submission or surrender to the victor, humans use their palms to display in a similar way to show that they are unarmed and therefore not a threat.

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Rejoicing: This gesture which combines jumping in the air with the slapping of hands, is a spontaneous display of joy. It is common in the field of sports.

Triumph: Arms straight in the air are a sign of success: the person feels this big.

Praise: in this gesture, palms and head are turned heavenwward.

Hail: Depending on the stiffness of the arm, this is a friendly gesture or a Fascist salute.

Surrender: A recognized gesture of submission, this arms-raised pose shows that the person is not reaching for a weapon.

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Jealousy: This gesture has various meanings and is generally an insult. In Mediterranean countries, it represents the horns of a cuckold; in Japan, it means an angry or jealous wife.

Thinking: People adopt this posture unconsciously. It is a modified prayer with a reassuring touch of the lips.

Mockery: Thumbing one’s nose is a playful insult, familiar to all ages and nationalities. Often the fingers are wiggled to emphasize mockery.

Stupidity: Common in Saudi Arabia, this implies, “I can see clearly that you are a fool.”

Loose screw: This gesture indicates that someone is crazy, that (s)he needs to tighten a loose screw in the head.

Teeth flick: This gesture, flicking a thumb-nail against the teeth, is common in Mediterranean countries, where it denotes anger.

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Bowing: This form of greeting is practiced mainly in Asian and is a common sign of respect. Performers also bow to their audience to acknowledge applause. In the West bowing still sometimes accompanies the handshake, suggesting humility, the person bowing being symbolically “smaller” than the other.

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Waving: This gesture is often made on meeting or parting. The hand raised with the palm upward is a classic way of drawing attention to oneself.

Nose Rubbing: Although rare in the West, the rubbing of nose is still practiced in other cultures, notably among Polynesians.

Handshake: The clasping of hands is a common gesture both on meeting and parting. It signifies a certain equality of status.

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The farther away from the brain a body part is positioned, the less awareness we have of what it is doing. This means that the legs and feet are an important source of information about someone's attitude because most people are unaware of what they are doing with them and never consider faking gestures with them in the way that they would withtheir face. A person can look composed and in control while their foot is repetitively tapping or making short jabs in the air, revealing their frustration at not being able to escape.

These results were verified by psychologist Paul Ekman, who discovered that people also increase their lower body movements when they lie but observers also have greater success exposing a person's lies when they can see the liar's entire body. This explains why many business executives feel comfortable only when sitting behind a desk with a solid front, where their lower body is hidden.

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Lee, Mark. (2006). Three elements of communication—and the so called “7%-38%-55% Rule.” Retrieved on October 19, 2009, at http://www.ecademy.com/node.php?id=78144

Pease, B. and Allan Pease. (2006). The Definitive Book of Body Language. Bantam: New York. Available for purchase at http://www.amazon.com/Definitive-Book-Body-Language/dp/0553804723

Morgan, N. (2002). The Truth Behind the Smile and Other Myths– When Body Language Lies. Retrieved on October 19, 2009 @ http://hbswk.hbs.edu/archive/3123.html