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Quest by Day, Vigil by Night

Ivan A. Khayiat

INTRODUCTION

Most of our earlier and respected poets have been principallyconcerned with the portrayal and celebration in verse of the typical andalso watershed events of cultural and historical significance. Probing thedimensions which reflect our unique cultural flavour and life, their corpushas contributed much towards the shapingof a creative palimpsest andcollective imagination. No doubt, for generations to come, many artists,from time to time, will resort thereto for inspiration.

The earlier poets' propensities for issues and matters referent to specificlocales and broader Caribbean society have been natural andunderstandable the given period in which they have enriched the literarycorpus of the region: That is, the epoch leading up to, surrounding, andfollowing political independence. Certainly, given the drama of those times- so full and fraught with the recognition and discovery ofour nativeculture(s), bright national dreams, andpossibilities of regional integrationand cooperation - the local and regional setting presented poets withmuch food for creative thought. When we consider, for instance, thecelebrated works of Edward Braithwaite, Martin Carter, A.J. Seymour, UnaManson, R. Dobru., Frank Collymore, David Dabydeen, Mahadai Das,Dennis Scott, Ian McDonald, Michael Slory and Rajkumari Singh, to name afew, the student of Caribbean Literature may summarily say: The vision ofthe majority ofearlier poets has been principally turned outward,andtheir concerns have revolved around history,, culture, portraits of societyand social possibilities.

This collectionof poetry departs from the foregoing practiced norms. Itsunderpinnings are radically more fundamental. Its concerns are deeplyontological. The principles underlying this shift in focus are existentiallyrooted as well as grounded on speculative thought. I sincerely hope thatthe following will suffice you, the reader, as an introductory framework

and background in understanding any challenges this collection maypresent.

FRAMEWORK & BACKGROUND

Ostensibly, we are born into ready-made societies. There appears to bedetermined boundaries, set values, set cultures, set presuppositions, setunrealities, set myths. The dwellers of each precinct seem fitted from birthwith a customized pair of 'blinders' which socialization further fixes andcements in place. Life, judging from mere outward appearances, following

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birth, consists in merely carrying on from where we entranced along thecourse set by our predecessors.

Yet, though we come into the world of 'being' and meet 'our' society in fullswing, so to speak, that which society thrusts upon us and seeks to freightus with is its sifted formulations taken from its historical accumulations of

beliefs, attitudes, traditions, predispositions, habitual patterns, folklore,rationalizations, blind spots, biases, hearsay, thoughts, and all the like - allof which have been posited by the multitudes who preceded us and thosepresently involved in the shaping continuum unfolding in and throughtime.

Despite the complex interaction of the past and present elements andforces at play, it is important however, that we realize that society andculture are sculpted and unveiled in and through time under the and

dynamic aegis of human consciousness participating in the process of'becoming.' Society and culture are manifestations of 'being'; a distillation,so to speak, often reflective of consciousness past and present.

Thus, as society and culture are posited by and resultant from 'being', thelatter is the fundamental antecedent to the former. And, as it is thefundamental antecedent, it follows that when society and culture aroundfragments and disintegrates, the most inherently natural point of returnor fall-back position, so to speak, built into the fabric of existence, is

'being'. The basicground thereof most readily manifests in each of us isthe 'self.

Born and raised in Guyana, I was a mere lad, nine years old, when thenation achieved independence. In less than ten short years, the euphoriabegan to fade, and the social possibilities, which some of the earlier poetsand my parents' generation envisioned for thenation following the dawn of independence, began panning out to thefuture. Those possibilities were unattainable given the array of problems

which hindsight unearthed: Corruption, greed, narrow mindedness andfragmentation - all imbedded in our body politic.

The fading of post-independence dreams amounted to the gradualdismantling of the society.This has been true for many small youngnations, born during and after the 1960s. Instead of witnessing in the

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years following independence the hoisting of our national flags to heightsof lasting achievement - considering that we live in the 'enlightened'twentieth century - the flag of many of our national aspirations has beensuccessively lowered.

On this point, I think a brief clarificatory comment is essential in order toavert an oversimplification. While problems imbedded in our body politichad their share in the lowering of our flags, such problems occurred in thecontext of a larger geopolitical framework, which also contributed itsshare. Power play with little regard for people, institutionalized hegemony,exploitative domination and divisive rule - have unfortunately remainedthe major weapons in the arsenal of control and conquest in globalrelations.

Nevertheless, particularly germane to the subject at hand was the option

which many - including my parents - seized upon awakening to theeventual outcome of political realities in our society: 'migration'. Whileunderstandable, given prevailing circumstances, and notwithstanding theapparent gains many have achieved consequently, the exercise of thischoice or right, and the resultant brain drain, served, however, to frustratefurther the achievement of national dreams. In effect, the 'migration'option dug deep trenches of despair. On the one hand, not only was theoften ambivalent migrant populace alienated from their native context,but also, on the other hand, and more tragically, it betrayed the haplesslot of the majority who remained at home only to witness the erosion ofconditions to frightful proportions.

In a nutshell, along with many from my generation and others since, Ihave witnessed from puberty the successive ushering in of, first, nationaldoubt, followed by its curious commingling with optimism, then gloomydespair, followed by hopeful abandonment. These have been the majorthematic undertones which have underscored the last two decades of lifein majority in this hemisphere.

THE PROBLEM & EMERGENCE OF CREATIVITY

Fishermen cast adrift, asea, without any clear beached landing. Such hasbeen the general predicament and condition of my generation and otherssince. Often laden with aspirations - the natural fruit of our soundformative education and upbringings based on clear articulated values -our mastless skiffs have often drifted on windless oceans for years, andeventually as strange shores, where, deeply disoriented within ourselveswe have been met by people often possessing narrow sympathies.

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Thus, alien from native land and thrust into unfamiliar places, the courseswe have had to explore were not grounded on such certainties as'homeland' or culturegivens for the preceding generation. Instead, morefundamental matters have been thrust before us to confront. and

contemplate: In brief, a return to 'being' a defining of our inherent, native'selfhood' - the inevitable outcome of deep fractures and fragmentationin our societies.

We, the hope and dream of the future, have had to face not just theshaped, but also the mis-shaped and un-shaped facticity of our reality andexistence. For fast fading is the world context the earlier poets and ourparents laboured within. A brave new world coming laid and still liesbefore us.

At times, in the course of the re-exploration, color, creed, class and the

host of national dividers society confronts us with have dissolved; the'many' moments of individual blended into One; and only the apparentverities of Life - the Earth, Humankind and the Creative Spirit - have stoodbefore us - awaiting some new formulation, truer and more reflective of adeeper, more beauteous reality achievable in the community ofhumankind.

Nevertheless, and as importantly, existentially speaking, we have had tore-explore the channels of our inherent, native 'selfhood' for yet morefundamental reasons as well, It was essential if we were to achieveconsonance of inner being and thereby mute and prevent the jangling

noises of discord, within and without, from wrecking havoc in our youngand often precious, gifted lives.

Such has been the origin and grounds for the creative kiln in which thefollowing poetic work was fired. The aegis under which the entire creativeprocess has occurred is the inherent ground of consciousness within, the'self, which I shall now briefly define.

THE SELF

The 'self is like a layered onion accessible through implosive acts of will. Itis readily perceived through the full range of conscious activitiesassociated with ego-life. Nevertheless, the goings-on of daily life merelyconstitute its visible and manifest aspect. Like the iceberg, most of itremains hidden and unseen. Most of us receive subterranean glimpsesand perhaps touch its fringe during sleep. However, deeper, moreluminous founts, lay dormant in the primordial expanses within, and theyoffer rich yields to those probing such depths via the subtler methods ofintrospection. Thereby, the 'self', as a reflection and expression of being,,

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potentially offers each of as a transparency through which deep truthsabout the ground of being- and our native selfhood may be perceived.

THE POETRY

This is a collection of poetic transparencies composed between 1978 and1990. Rooted in experiences which left indelible impressions on theimaginative consciousness, the poetry meanders beyond creeks of fancifulcreation to the more engaging of channels of introspection and self-reflective experiences; finally entrancing those wider waterways whichtouch the fringe of that vast ocean where Life and truth seem resident. Itis a poetry expressive of growth in time, hope and pain, longing andresolve,love and suffering. It highlights the discoveries of beautifulinscapes amid untold outer discontents. All these,elements of Life'sbeauteous quest and struggle for truth and resolution, are curiouslyinterwoven in a rich tapestry that defies detangling like only poetry,

wrought inthe creative fount of the 'Self, can.

CLOSNG REMARKS

As poet, I celebrate an introspective quest and process to rediscover andredefine 'being' and selfhood'. What appears following the shattering ofacquired notions of selfhood and an existential exploration of an innerway, is an increasingly inclusive, integrated image of 'being'. Therein, as adisplaced migrant, I have found solace and redemption the fragmentationof the contemporary era.

As has repeatedly occurred in the dark, crisis moments of individual andbroader human history, out of the rubble of our fragmentation and thedebris of our humanly self-inflicted confusion, a phoenix of hope rises fromthe ashes of our acknowledged bewilderment. Our future answers, Ibelieve, will undoubtedly emerge through the creative human spirit after areturn to 'being' and a rediscovery of the essence of Selfhood. Most ofthese seeds have been sown and cast in the winds; they merely awaitglobal discovery, recognition and acceptance.

My sincere and abiding hope remains that therewith and therebygenuinely rich solutions born of the collective actions of large-minded,ethical and responsible individuals, all willfully joining arms together, will,by degrees, result in a deepening realization of human upliftment, andregional and global stability.

POETIC PROLOGUE

Ivan A. Khayiat April 1991

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QUEST BY DAY 8

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