Positive Guidance Positive Guidance

andand

DisciplineDiscipline

•As a result, punishment focuses on the parent being responsible for controlling a child's behavior. Discipline focuses on the child controlling his/her own behavior.

Discipline vs. Punishment•Discipline is different from

punishment. Discipline teaches children to learn from their mistakes while punishment only makes suffer for them.

•In fact, imposing suffering actually shifts the focus from the lesson that needs to be learned to who is in control.

Reasons for MisbehaviorReasons for Misbehavior•Stage of Growth: the child is behaving in a normal manner for the stage of growth he/she is in: power, attention, revenge, assumed inadequacy are normal

•Unfulfilled Needs: The child’s needs are not being met and she/he is acting out in order to try to get his/her needs met.

Reasons for MisbehaviorReasons for Misbehavior

•Environment: The child is uncomfortable in or does not understand his/her environment.

•Doesn’t know better: The child has not been taught the concept he/she is dealing with.

Types of Guidance Types of Guidance TechniquesTechniques

1. Natural and Logical 1. Natural and Logical ConsequencesConsequences

a. Natural Consequences: occur without interference and child can see the result of their choices

•Short in duration, not imposed in anger, provide opportunities for children to learn from their behavior

•Example: Kristi did not wear her gloves and her hands get cold.

•Should be relevant to the misbehavior

•Should make the punishment fit the crime.

•Cannot be used if the consequence will cause harm to self, others or property, or too far in the future.

•Example: if Sally spills the paint, she must clean up the mess that is made.

b. Logical Consequences

2. Positive Statements2. Positive Statements

•When guiding children, phrase all requests in a positive manner

•Example: say, “Let’s walk to the playground,” rather than, “Don’t run to the playground.”

•Clearly states what is expected, then help them get started

•Talk to children at their eye level when giving directions

3. Redirection3. Redirection

•Get him to focus on something else

•Example: if he is angry at the blocks area, lead him to a different area of the room and introduce a different activity

•Children up to two years old can be easily distracted

4. Reverse Attention4. Reverse Attention•When a child’s behavior is inappropriate, focus on a child who is displaying the appropriate behavior and make a positive comment

•If the first child changes his behavior, he should be immediately reinforced with a positive statement

•Ignoring the negative, reinforcing the positive

5. Limited Choices5. Limited Choices•Do not give him an unlimited choice unless he can really have what is chosen.

•Only give choices that are available.

•Example: “Do you want juice or water for a drink?” rather than, ‘What would you like to drink?”

Limited Choices (continued)Limited Choices (continued)

For example:For example:Joshua is misbehaving in Joshua is misbehaving in the toy store running the toy store running around like a little around like a little maniac. Pull him to the maniac. Pull him to the side and quietly give him side and quietly give him the choice, “Joshua, the choice, “Joshua, would you like to calm would you like to calm down and behave or down and behave or would you like mom to would you like mom to take you home right take you home right now? Most likely he will now? Most likely he will choose the first option!choose the first option!

For misbehavior:For misbehavior:•Make the choices Make the choices relevant to what you relevant to what you really want the child to really want the child to do. do. •Do not use time out as a Do not use time out as a choice.choice.•It is imperative that you It is imperative that you are willing to carry out are willing to carry out their choice their choice making sure making sure one of them is not seen as one of them is not seen as a punishmenta punishment

6. Time Out6. Time Out

•When a child has disobeyed a rule, she will be sent to a predetermined place to distance herself from the problem and gain composure.

•Should be a last option with limited use.

•Use a place where there are no distractions or positive reinforcers

Positive Guidance Tips & TermsPositive Guidance Tips & Terms•Discipline: guidance which helps the child learn self-control

•Self-discipline: ability to direct one’s own behavior

•Children may rebel when parents punish rather than discipline

•Attention is a powerful reinforcer to guide children; they often misbehave for attention

•Consistency is the key to guidance

•Respond to aggressive behavior in non-aggressive ways