8/4/2019 Penn Live- Breast Cancer? Me?

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t cancer? Me? A personal account of my diagnosis and treatment (With Video) | pennlive.com

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Breast cancer? Me? A personalaccount of my diagnosis and treatment(With Video)Sept. 19, 2011, 12:17 p.m. EDTDelaware County Daily Times

To say that 2011 has been a year of great change for me is a bit of anunderstatement. As I write this article, I have just finished the last of sevenstraight weeks of daily radiation therapy for breast cancer.

It all began during a routine checkup in March. I told my gynecologist,Samantha Pfeifer of Penn Medicine, that I had found a lump. You shouldunderstand that, for me, lumps are not very unusual. As she felt my left breast, a look came over her face. “I’m sending you to a breast surgeon. If Imiss something I would never forgive myself,” she said.

I think in my heart of hearts I already knew what the result would be, andduring the late afternoon of April 28 – just as my high school reunion fromShipley was about to begin – I received news no woman wants to hear: “Youhave breast cancer.” Invasive, lobular breast cancer to be precise. The roomswirled for a moment. It was a total out-of-body, this-can’t-be-happeningmoment.

The first phone call I made was to my boyfriend. I just blurted out the news. Ineeded to know if he could handle this. He told me we would get through ittogether. Then one by one, I told my family and close friends. I hated makingthose calls.

I spent a few of those early days in front of a mirror, trying to come to terms with how I looked at that moment, and how I might look after (depending onthe size of the mass and the margins that needed to come out around it). Ialso made my peace with the possibility of losing the entire breast. That wasa really hard and weird place to go, but I had to do it. I stood in front of themirror and covered up one breast. That was when it really hit me: breastcancer hits the core of femininity in every woman it touches.

I also made a major decision: I would be open and positive about my disease– but not so positive as to sound like an over-medicated Hallmark card. Already a blogger, I started a new blog (

http://ihavebreastcancerblog.wordpress.com ) that would chronicle thischapter in my life. My original goal was selfish: blogging would betherapeutic; writing has always been carthartic for me.

But my blog soon evolved into a place for others. First it became a gatheringplace for my family and friends, a site they could visit for information and forreassurance that I wasn’t contemplating walking off a ledge somewhere.

Then, remarkably, it became a place for strangers. My blog isn’t advertised yet people from all over the country – breast cancer patients and survivors Ihave never met – have become readers. It is awe-inspiring and comforting atthe same time to connect with women who just get it. Because some days you just need that “yeah I know.” Because they really do know.

I had my surgery on June 1st. Much of that morning was a blur but I do

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8/4/2019 Penn Live- Breast Cancer? Me?

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t cancer? Me? A personal account of my diagnosis and treatment (With Video) | pennlive.com

www.pennlive.com/newsflash/index.ssf/story/breast-cancer-me-a-personal-account-of-my-diagnosis-and-treatment-with-video/9952f8b61ba84da3a59421138c9df369[10/4/2011 8:03:17 PM]

remember that my surgeon, Dr. Dahlia Sataloff at Pennsylvania Hospital, wasin complete control – and was wearing Dansko clogs I loved (patent leatherleopard print). I couldn’t remember what they told me about how much of my breast had been removed, but I remembered what my surgeon was wearing and that I had had an almost exclusively female surgical team.

I had a lumpectomy – also known as a partial mastectomy – that morning. I went home later that day wrapped up like a gauze mummy. The hardest part was having to go to my local drug store pick up my pain medication. I stoodin front of four people behind the counter not waiting on people for twenty minutes before I finally asked if they noticed the woman just out of surgery standing in front of them. I think my anger was the only thing keeping me on

my feet.The initial news after surgery was good: I had clean surgical margins and nolymph node involvement. It was Stage 2. A few weeks later, I received my Oncotype score, which measures the probability of recurrence. It was on thelow end of the scale so I wouldn’t lose my hair to chemotherapy. I would,however, have to have radiation five times a week for seven weeks – 35treatments in all – followed by five years on the drug, Tamoxifen.

Dr. Marisa Weiss and her team at Lankenau Hospital would handle my radiation treatments. Founder of the Ardmore-based non-profit,BreastCancer.org , Dr. Weiss is an energetic advocate for educating womenabout breast health. She gives breast cancer survivors – and women who want to be proactive about their breast health – a path to follow that isunderstandable, livable and empowering.

Radiation, although easier then chemotherapy, was rough. Not only are you

incredibly tired all the time, but you also have to live with perpetual sunburnthat really, really hurts. Because my skin is sensitive, I’ve also had to put up with what can only be described as radiation rash and patches of degradedskin. Sharp, shooting pains running through the surgical site periodically asinternal stiches continue to work their way out. Some days I was so tired thatall wanted to do is sleep, but I couldn’t. Still, every day of radiation broughtme one step closer to the end of that phase of my treatment.

These last few months have taught me a lot about myself. I’ve learned thatI‘m much tougher than I thought and that I’ve been blessed. Not only do Ihave a supportive family and boyfriend, but I also have the most amazingfriends in the world. Early on they decided I would never go to a radiationtreatment or a doctor’s appointment alone so a friend from high schoolcreated a rotating chauffeur schedule, better known as the “Driving MissDaisy List.”

Far away friends and non-drivers have been supportive in other ways. They have kept me going through every single day of this. I will never be able torepay the debt I owe them.

On September 13, a sunny Tuesday morning, I finished my radiation. I wasovercome with emotion all morning but did my actual crying in thetreatment room when it was over – bittersweet tears of happiness, relief andgratitude. I knew I’d never forget the awesome team of technicians andnurses at Lankenau.

 A slew of my Driving Miss Daisy pals and my mother, along with a dear malefriend (who braved the gal gauntlet) had gathered in the waiting room. Whenit was all over and I rang the special bell signifying the end of treatment, they cheered. A hospital administrator chided us for being too loud.

 At the end of the day I am alive with a terrific prognosis for a long and happy 

life. I am one of the lucky ones.

I’m now part of the sisterhood – women of different races, ethnicities, ages,sizes and shapes –forever bound together by this disease.

Breast cancer is so much more than pink rubber bracelets. It has challengedthe very core of my femininity and changed my life forever. I now proudly call myself a survivor, even if it was a heck of a way to spend a summer.

Haverford resident Carla J. Zambelli is a blogger, publicist, free-lance writer,photographer and community activist.

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