Nonviolent Communication Deck — Words for Feelings ...

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Afraid Apprehensive Dread Foreboding Frightened Mistrustful Panicky Petried Scared Suspicious Terried Wary Worried Annoyed Aggravated Dismayed Disgruntled Displeased Exasperated Frustrated Impatient Irritated Irked Angry Enraged Furious Incensed Indignant Irate Livid Outraged Resentful Aversion Animosity Appalled Contempt Disgusted Dislike Hate Horried Hostile Repulsed Confused Ambivalent Baed Bewildered Dazed Hesitant Lost Mystied Perplexed Puzzled Torn Disconnected Alienated Aloof Apathetic Bored Cold Detached Distant Distracted Indierent Numb Removed Uninterested Withdrawn Disquiet Agitated Alarmed [Concerned] Discombobulated Disconcerted Disturbed [Indecisive] Perturbed Rattled Restless Shocked Startled Surprised Troubled Turbulent Turmoil Uncomfortable Uneasy Unnerved Unsettled Upset Embarrassed Ashamed Chagrined [Disappointed] Flustered Guilty Mortied Self-Conscious Fatigue Beat Burnt Out Depleted Exhausted Lethargic Listless Sleepy Tired Weary Worn Out Pain Agony [Alienated] Anguished Bereaved Devastated Grief Heartbroken Hurt Lonely Miserable Regretful Remorseful Sad Depressed Dejected Despair Despondent Discouraged Disheartened Forlorn Gloomy Heavy Hearted Hopeless Melancholy Unhappy Wretched Tense Anxious [Cautious] [Conicted] Cranky Distressed Distraught Edgy Fidgety Frazzled Irritable Jittery Nervous Overwhelmed Restless Stressed Out Vulnerable Fragile Guarded Helpless [In a Stew] Insecure Leery Reserved Sensitive Shaky Yearning Envious Jealous Longing Nostalgic Pining Wistful Aectionate Compassionate Friendly Loving Open Hearted Sympathetic Tender [Touched] Warm Engaged Absorbed Alert Curious Engrossed Enchanted Entranced Fascinated Interested Intrigued Involved Spellbound Stimulated Hopeful Expectant Encouraged Optimistic Confident [Clever] Empowered Open Proud Sage Secure Excited Amazed Animated Ardent Aroused Astonished Dazzled Eager Energetic Enthusiastic Giddy Invigorated Lively Passionate Surprised Vibrant Grateful Appreciative Moved ankful Touched Inspired Amazed Awed Wonder Joyful Amused Delighted Glad Happy Jubilant Pleased Tickled Exhilarated Blissful Ecstatic Elated Enthralled Exuberant Radiant Rapturous rilled Peaceful Calm Clear Headed Comfortable Centered Content Equanimous Fullled Mellow Quiet Relaxed Relieved Satised Serene Still Tranquil Trusting Refreshed Enlivened Rejuvenated Renewed Rested Restored Revived Nonviolent Communication Deck — Words for Feelings Feelings we may have when our needs are not satisfied Feelings we may have when our needs are satisfied

Transcript of Nonviolent Communication Deck — Words for Feelings ...

AfraidApprehensiveDreadForebodingFrightenedMistrustfulPanickyPetrifiedScaredSuspiciousTerrifiedWaryWorried

AnnoyedAggravatedDismayedDisgruntledDispleasedExasperatedFrustratedImpatient

IrritatedIrked

AngryEnragedFuriousIncensedIndignantIrateLividOutragedResentful

AversionAnimosityAppalledContemptDisgustedDislikeHateHorrifiedHostileRepulsed

ConfusedAmbivalentBaffledBewilderedDazedHesitantLostMystifiedPerplexedPuzzledTorn

DisconnectedAlienatedAloofApatheticBoredColdDetachedDistantDistractedIndifferent

NumbRemovedUninterestedWithdrawn

DisquietAgitatedAlarmed[Concerned]DiscombobulatedDisconcertedDisturbed[Indecisive]PerturbedRattledRestlessShockedStartledSurprisedTroubledTurbulentTurmoil

UncomfortableUneasyUnnervedUnsettledUpset

EmbarrassedAshamedChagrined[Disappointed]FlusteredGuiltyMortifiedSelf-Conscious

FatigueBeatBurnt OutDepletedExhaustedLethargicListlessSleepy

TiredWearyWorn Out

PainAgony[Alienated]AnguishedBereavedDevastatedGriefHeartbrokenHurtLonelyMiserableRegretfulRemorseful

SadDepressedDejectedDespairDespondent

DiscouragedDisheartenedForlornGloomyHeavy HeartedHopelessMelancholyUnhappyWretched

TenseAnxious[Cautious][Conflicted]CrankyDistressedDistraughtEdgyFidgetyFrazzledIrritableJittery

NervousOverwhelmedRestlessStressed Out

VulnerableFragileGuardedHelpless[In a Stew]InsecureLeeryReservedSensitiveShaky

YearningEnviousJealousLongingNostalgicPiningWistful

AffectionateCompassionateFriendlyLovingOpen HeartedSympatheticTender[Touched]Warm

EngagedAbsorbedAlertCurious

EngrossedEnchantedEntrancedFascinatedInterestedIntriguedInvolvedSpellboundStimulated

HopefulExpectantEncouragedOptimistic

Confident[Clever]EmpoweredOpenProudSageSecure

ExcitedAmazedAnimatedArdentArousedAstonished

DazzledEagerEnergeticEnthusiasticGiddyInvigoratedLively PassionateSurprisedVibrant

GratefulAppreciativeMoved

ThankfulTouched

InspiredAmazedAwedWonder

JoyfulAmusedDelightedGladHappyJubilant

PleasedTickled

ExhilaratedBlissfulEcstaticElatedEnthralledExuberantRadiantRapturousThrilled

PeacefulCalmClear HeadedComfortableCenteredContentEquanimousFulfilledMellowQuietRelaxedRelievedSatisfied

SereneStillTranquilTrusting

RefreshedEnlivenedRejuvenatedRenewedRestedRestoredRevived

Nonviolent Communication Deck — Words for FeelingsFeelings we may have when our needs are not satisfied

Feelings we may have when our needs are satisfied

ConnectionAcceptance[Acknowledgement]AffectionAppreciationBelonging[Consideration]CooperationCommunicationClosenessCommunityCompanionshipCompassionConsiderationConsistencyEmpathy[Honoring Agreements]

InclusionIntimacy[Kindness]LoveMutualityNurture[Recognition]RespectSelf-RespectSecurity[Shared Reality][Sharing]StabilitySupport[Tenderness] [To Explore & Honor My Values]To Know & Be Known

To See & Be Seen [To be Seen for My True Intentions][Transparency]TrustWarmth

Physical Well-BeingFood, Water, Air, ShelterPhysical Movement Exercise[Pleasure]Rest & SleepSexual ExpressionSafety[Solitude]Touch

HonestyAuthenticityIntegrityPresence

Play[Fun]JoyHumor[Laughter]

PeaceBeautyCommunionEaseEqualityHarmonyInspirationOrder

AutonomyChoice[Fairness & Justice]FreedomIndependence[Interdependence][Power with]SpaceSpontaneity

Meaning[Accomplishment]AwarenessCelebrationChallengeClarityCompetenceConsciousness

To ContributeCreativityDiscoveryEfficacyEffectiveness[Expression][Grieving]HopeLearning & GrowthMourning [Loss]ParticipationPurposeSelf-ExpressionSensory StimulationTo MatterUnderstanding[Visions & Dreams]

Nonviolent Communication Deck — Needs Inventory A starting place to find support & facilitate greater understanding

Empathy Buddy GuidelinesEmpathy, in NVC, is first and foremost about holding presence for another person. This exercise is designed to recharge our “empathy batteries.”1. Review potential Empathy Blockers, and agree that during this time each person will

hold the intention of not responding from one of these blockers. (Blockers are things like advising, educating, one-upping, consoling, sympathizing, story-telling, shutting down, interrogating, correcting, reassuring, denial of feelings, minimizing, diagnosing, and analyzing.)

2. Each person will have _____ minutes of uninterrupted time to talk or just be. The Listener’s task is to be present for the whole unbroken person who is inside their Buddy, the Speaker.

3. The Speaker lay down Feelings Cards that match their current inner experience as they share about what’s feeling alive in them.

4. In response, the Listener lays down Needs Cards they are guessing might be connected to the Feelings Cards in front of them: “Are you feeling ____ because of the need for ______?” (Guesses are intuitive offerings, not hypotheses.)

5. When a variety of Needs Cards are laid down, the Speaker selects the Needs Cards that most resonate for them in that moment.

6. The process ends with Listener asking, “What request do you have for yourself? What request do you have for me?”

7. The Speaker and Listener switch roles and repeat the process.

Empathy Buddy Guidelines have been adapted from a process developed by the Maine NVC Network: www.mainenvcnetwork.org.

The words and phrases for needs and feelings on this sheet and the enclosed deck are from the Center for Nonviolent Communication, © 2005:[email protected]+1 505.244.4041

Words in [brackets] are additions from the Maine NVC Network.

Artwork: DontEatThePaste.com

Deck made by

Nonviolent Communication

Feelings & NeedsCARDS