- /;'

MR. TORGO'S NEIGHBORHOOD

EPISODE 101

PILOT

~I

setting: TORGO's cardboard box house.

TORGO: Greetings. I am Torgo. I live here. This is myneighborhood. I live here. I didn't used to live here, butnow I do. I moved here when my father lost his job with themaster. (TORGO stands and points to each object listed)This is my wall. This is my other wall. This is my otherwall. This is my window. This is a rat hole. This is mychair. This is my cupboard. These are my friends. You aremy friend too. Do you want to be my friend?

FLOORS: No.

TORGO: Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Don't mind them; they are real /jokers. Do you know the alphabet? I will teach it to you.(see separate alphabet page)~ooP! now it is time to feedthe fish. (TORGO pulls a small bottle out of one of hispockets and drops a small amount of its contents intoanother of his pockets.) (door knocking sound effect) Whois at my door?

(SPEEDY enters)

SPEEDY: Hello. It is only me, your cousin Speedy. I deliverthings for the master.

TORGO: I am Torgo. I live here. Why are you here today?

SPEEDY: I have the replacement parts for your friend in thecorner.

FLOOR: Wha?

SPEEDY: Not you, the robot.

FLOOR: Oh.

TORGO: I wanted these parts last Tuesday. You are early. Willyou stay and help me install the parts?

SPEEDY: I will.

TORGO: (eagerly opening the package) Now I can fix my robot.While I fix him, you can watch a magic movie. This is mymagic movie screen. It will show you a fun movie. Watch.

S-~. ~ (TORGO pushes button on wall. Zoom on screen and fade to___~ magic movie) .

(fade back to TORGO)

No! I'm not done yet.(insert commercial)(fade back to TORGO)

Watch a commercial.

TORGO: I am done now. It took a long time because Speedybrought the wrong parts. He was supposed to bring me arobot face and he brought a tebby bear face.

SPEEDY: I told you already. I'll bring the right parts.

TORGO: I will turn him on now.

TIMMY: Hello I am Timmy. Thank you kind master for giving melife again.

TORGO: I am not the master. He is not here. The masterwouldn't approve of me being the master.

TIMMY: My deepest apologies Mr. Torgo. Can you ever forgive myignorance, oh great one?

SPEEDY: Why don't his words match up with his mouth?

TORGO: He's Japanese.

S~4

SPEEDY: Oh.master.

I have to leave now. I must deliver things for the

(exi t SPEEDY.)

TORGO: Now it is story time.

S 5(insert storytime)

~ (enter FROTHY)

- /"' -~ sle '*!~~~FROTHY~ ~.~working again.

TORGO: Yes I did.

Oh no! You got that infernal machine

FROTHY: I'm nocturnal. How am I supposed to get any sleep backhere with that metal moron constantly brown-nosing like EdMcMahon?

TORGO: I don't know what you mean.

FROTHY: Of course you don't.

TORGO: I'd like you to meet my television friend. Televisionfriend, this is Frothy Cheesehead. He lives in my wall.

(exit FROTHY)

7TORGO: Did you like that? The director wanted me to show it to

you, but I showed it to you.

TORGO: Goodbye friend. Now it's time forTravel through the magic bag.

It/.(zoom into bag and fade to puppetland)(Fade back to TORGO)

FROTHY: And it's not a particularly great wall either. Now theWhite House, that was a great wall. But then in '93 thosegiant cockroaches moved in and started setting traps. Atethree of my friends, they did. But I digress. I'm goingback to bed. Try to keep it down out here.

(WACKY puts head in TORGO's window)

WACKY: Yoo Hoo! Mr. Torgo!

TORGO: Wha? Who is at my window?

WACKY: It's me, Mr. Neighbor. I was just wondering what's goingon in here.

TORGO: I am making a TV show. Don't you ever knock?

WACKY: Why don't you introduce me to your television friends?

TORGO: Because I don't like you.

WACKY: Aw come on. Be a pal. You introduced the rat.

TORGO: This is Wacky Neighbor. Now please go away.

(exit WACKY)

TIMMY: Great idea.

(insert invention)

TORGO: I have to end the show now.

TIMMY: If I may say so, sir, that's an excellent idea, butshouldn't you give them the address first?

TORGO: Yes I should. Please write to us at (fill in address) .~GOOdbye new friends. Please write many letters. Goodbye.

Alphabet

A is for axA weapon to kill.

B is for barbizonLook in the window for a thrill.

C is for cardboardThat makes up my wall.

D is for dingleberriesFrom dogs they fall.

E is for erisolA kind of can.

F is for fleasMy favorite named stan.

G is for garbageThe place to find toys in.

H is for heela monsterA lizard with poison.

I is for inkFound in a squid.

J is for janitorWith his garbage can lid.

K is for kandy kornA badly spelled candy.

L is for largeA knee size that's handy.

M is for masterWith many a wife.

N is for neesAnd also for nife.

o is for ossassin­Who uses a gun.

P is for puddleOops! I made one.

Q is queer queer pelicans.This line will rhyme.

R is for ratsRoomates of mine.

S is for seagullA nasty old bird.

T is for Tu-rotr;v"'1A useful little word.

U is for uncleWho's also my dad.

V is for virusThat makes you feel bad.

W is for wartFound on my finger.

X is for xscapeThat means not to linger.

Y is for yoorupWith castles and moats.

Z is for zylophoneThat plays many melodies.

Magic Movie 101

WHAT LIVES IN MY BACKYARD

setting: teacher or scientist with pictures of animals onan easel and cards to read lines from.

SCIENTIST: There is a lot of wildlife that lives in a suburbanback yard. It's true. Today we'll take a look at a few ofthe things that may even live in your yard.

(The animal descriptions will be written on cards to read)

SCIENTIST: So as you can see, not everything in your back yardis a f~d mouse or songbird. Beware.

Commercial 101

PSYCHIATRIST'S BOOK OF HOME REMEDIES

setting: home like setting. an with a book.

~MAN: Psychiatry is an ever-growing ~ld and the psychiatristsand psychologists can't handle every little mental complaintthat passes through their offices. That's why a team ofpracticing psychiatrists compiled this book, ThePsychiatrist's Book of Home Remedies. It contains simplecures for everything from anorexia to zoophobia. Likethese:

Multiple personalities, eat live fish.

Scared of heights, sew raisins together.

Obsessive compulsive, drink eggs through a licorice straw.

Autistic, put wet teabags in ears.

Manic depressive, paint legs with yogurt.

Paranoid, tape meat to forehead.

Split personality, eat vanilla pudding.

Fear of people, tie carp to ankle.

Compulsive overeater, buy "gumby" action figures.

The list goes on and on. Page after page of proof thatgrandma's old remedies really worked. That's ~Psychiatrist's Book of Home Remedies, only $19.95 at yourlocal book store.

storytime 101 "Mr. Wolf Goes to the Farm"

TORGO: I'm going to read you a story. This is a story called"Mr. Wolf Goes to the Farm". This is how it goes:

Mr. Wolf is a happy wolf. Do you know why he's happy? He'shappy because he knows where there's a farm to visit. Mr. Wolflikes to visit the farm when he's hungry. This farm raiseslittle pigs, perky chickens, and big, slow cows. Mr. Wolfdoesn't like the cows, they are big. They scare him. Mr. Wolflikes the chickens and pigs. Do you like to eat chicken? Sodoes Mr. Wolf. How do you eat your chicken? Baked, fried,roasted, or in a sandwich? Mr. Wolf eats it differently. Hedoesn't cook his chicken. Mr. Wolf also likes pigs. Do you likebacon or h n or pork? Mr. Wo likes them all, but he doesn'tcook them either. Now Mr. Wol will go home with a full bellyfrom visiting the farm. Watch your bookstore for the next Mr.Wolf adventure, "Mr. Wolf Battles Salmonella and Trichinosis."

Purple Village 101

NEIGHBORHOOD ART CONTEST

setting: Peanut, Stinky, Fluffy and Bingo gathered in townsquare near Nasty's castle.

PEANUT: I made a paper scarecrow for the art fair. What did youmake, Stinky?

STINKY: I made a life-sized macaroni sculpture.

FLUFFY: What is it a life-sized sculpture of?

STINKY: I just told you, macaroni.

PEANUT: Wow. That's much b t than mine.

BINGO: I made a paper mache nose.

FLUFFY: And I made a painting of the king.

STINKY: You're sure to win. The king is the judge.

(mumbles of agreement)(enter Nasty)

NASTY: Hey, you smoochers! Get off my property!

BINGO: It's not your property. It's the town square.

NASTY: Sorry, flashback. Say, you kids weren't planning to goto the art fair were you?

PEANUT: We were planning to. Our art is on display there.

NASTY: I wouldn't recommend it. Don't you know?

BINGO: Know what?

NASTY: Oh nothing. Just that if you go into the king's castleyou'll burn up like acid.

STINKY: No we won't.

NASTY: Yes you will.

KIDS: No we won't.

NASTY: Yes you will.

KIDS: No we won't.

NASTY: Yes you will.

KIDS: Tastes great.

NASTY: Less filling.

KIDS: Tastes great.

NASTY: Less filling.

PEANUT: stop! This isn't doing us any good. Besides, why wouldshe lie to us?

STINKY: Good point. I'm not gonna get my head burned off.

BINGO: Neither am I.

FLUFFY: Not me!

(cut to soup family at home)

DAD: Fluffy, Bingo! We're going to be late for the art fair!

BINGO: I'm not going!

FLUFFY: Me neither!

MOM: Why not?

FLUFFY: We can't. Nasty said that if we go in the King's castlewe'll burn up like acid.

DAD: Don't be silly. I've been in the castle dozens of timesbefore and I'm fine.

MOM: Me too. Nasty was just trying to scare you.

BINGO: Ok. I guess we'll go.

(cut to children outside the royal castle)

PEANUT: I guess if your parents are inside and they're still ok,I'll go in.

STINKY: Me too. Let's go.

(the children enter the castle. Cut to inside. They alllook around for a moment, then their heads melt and steamlike acid)

invention 101 "Mr. History Bear"

TORGO: This is my newest invention, Mr History Bear. A lot ofkids don't like history, so Mr History Bear makes history fun.(showing costumes) He can be Noah bear, Crucifiction bear,Ceasar bear, and even some recent historical figures like Hitlerbear and Gorby bear. What do you think, Timmy. , Pro ~ntS~~?

TIMMY: It's great! Can I have one?