Michigan Housing Directors Association Winter Conference · • With an Action Learning Group of...
Transcript of Michigan Housing Directors Association Winter Conference · • With an Action Learning Group of...
Michigan Housing Directors Association
Winter Conference
February 2019
Beth Steiger
1 Copyright © 2019 Beth Steiger
Introduction to Communication Skills (30 mins)
Teamwork Activity – Three Islands (1 hr)
Break (15 mins)
Listening Skills & Managing Conflict (1 hr 15 mins)
Lunch (1 hr 30 mins)
Thinking Style Preferences (1 hr 15 mins)
Break (15 mins)
Communication Roles & Barriers (1 hr)
Wrap-up (30 mins)
Adjourn
Course Overview
9:00 a.m.
9:30 a.m.
10:30 a.m.
10:45 a.m.
12:00 p.m.
1:30 p.m.
2:45 p.m.
3:00 p.m.
4:00 p.m.
4:30 p.m.
2 Copyright © 2019 Beth Steiger
Session Objectives
Following the completion of this learning session, you will
be able to:
Identify personal strengths and areas for development in
communication skills.
Build teamwork skills through active learning to improve
communications.
Identify your communication style preferences and develop
skills improve communication with others.
Apply improved communication skills to a variety of
circumstances and environments.
Describe the fundamental barriers to effective
communication and strategies or overcome them.
3 Copyright © 2019 Beth Steiger
Session Objectives
Following the completion of this learning session, you will
be able to:
Identify personal strengths and areas for development in
communication skills.
Build teamwork skills through active learning to improve
communications.
Identify your communication style preferences and develop
skills improve communication with others.
Apply improved communication skills to a variety of
circumstances and environments.
Describe the fundamental barriers to effective
communication and strategies or overcome them.
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Communication in Organizations
• Complete personal self assessment on communication goals
• Keep to reflect back on at the end of the day.
Action Learning 1 – Communication Self Assessment
5 minutes
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Why Communication?
Why is it important to invest in the improvement of
communication?
I hadn’t learned yet what I know now –
that communication is everything.
Lee Iacocca
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Why Communication?
Why is it important to invest in the improvement of
communication?
The more elaborate our means of
communication, the less we
communicate.
Joseph Priestley
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What is Communication?
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One Way to View Communication…
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Another Way to View Communication…
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A More Complete Way to View Communication…
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Relative Impacts of Channels of Communication
Visual
55%
Verbal
7%
Vocal
38%
- from research of Albert Mehrabian, Silent Messages
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What is Communication?
A process of sharing meaning…
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Two Fundamental Rules of Communication
1) You cannot not communicate
2) Communication is a “chicken-and-egg”
process
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Communication in Organizations
• With an Action Learning partner, review each item on the
Communication Fact or Fallacy worksheet.
• If you believe the statement to be true, discuss why.
• If you believe the statement to be false, discuss why not.
• Be prepared to discuss your ideas with all of us.
Action Learning 2 – A True-False Exercise
5 minutes
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Communication in Organizations – Fact or Fallacy?
Meanings are in words.
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Communication in Organizations – Fact or Fallacy?
Communication will solve
all our problems.
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Communication in Organizations – Fact or Fallacy?
Telling is communicating.
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Communication in Organizations – Fact or Fallacy?
Communication is a good thing.
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Communication in Organizations – Fact or Fallacy?
The more communication the better.
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Communication in Organizations – Fact or Fallacy?
Communication can break down.
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Communication in Organizations – Fact or Fallacy?
Communication is a natural ability.
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Three Islands Team Activity
Guidelines:
1. There are 3 separate groups
participating in this activity.
2. You have already been separated
into a group as indicated by a
shape/color on your name tag. 60 minutes
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What observations did you make in
regards to the good and bad that
happened during the activity?
What enabled success?
What created barriers?
How did this activity parallel the real
world of public housing?
Three Islands - Reflection
Action Learning 3
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Team Effectiveness Model
Goals Roles
Processes
Relationships
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Shared Goals
• Do we understand the challenges and
opportunities of the work/project?
• Is the purpose of the team well defined within
the context of the overall project?
• Are individual members aligned with the
purpose of the team?
• Have we set specific, measurable end results
for the team?
What is our purpose?
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Clear Roles & Responsibilities
• Have we identified individual accountabilities
for each member of the team?
• Does each person on the team understand
what others expect from them?
• Have we clarified the role of leader and other
technical experts?
• Do we know how we will deal with change in
membership?
What do we expect from each other?
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Established Systems & Procedures
• Have we defined the type and frequency of
communication needed to be successful?
• Are our meetings a good use of everyone’s time?
• Have we adopted techniques & tools to make
decisions, track progress and evaluate
effectiveness?
• Are we able to make productive use of conflict and
differences?
How will we operate?
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Effective Relationships
• Do team members know each other well enough
to be comfortable?
• Is interpersonal communication with the group
effective?
• Is there balanced participation from all members?
• Have we established feedback expectations and
identified needs?
• How we will celebrate success?
How can we optimize synergy?
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What is my commitment to the team?
• Do individuals feel a personal commitment to
make the team effective?
• Are we demonstrating support for each other
and the team?
• Do we visibly recognize the contributions of
others?
• Have we identified the development needs of
the team and each other?
Individual Contribution
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BREAK
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Listening
Listening is a ____________ decision
- fill in the blank
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Barriers to Effective Listening
Why are we often poor listeners?
• Talking too much
• Pseudo-listening
• Selective listening
• Self-fulfilling prophecies
• Self-focused
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Why Are You Listening?
You may be listening for:
1) Content
2) Emotion
3) Need
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Active Listening
Active Listening is an
interactive process
that leads to deep
understanding
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The Three Skills of Active Listening
1) Posing questions
2) Reflecting
3) Waiting
- Probing
- Prodding
- Paraphrasing
- Summarizing
- Being silent
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Active Listening
• With an Action Learning Group of three, assign roles of
Sender, Receiver, and Observer.
• Sender should select a decision he/she has to make in the
near future (one with multiple options) and discuss it with the
Receiver.
• The Receiver should practice Active Listening skills, without
giving advice or trying to solve the Sender’s problem.
• Observer should take notes on the effectiveness of the Active
Listening.
Action Learning 4 – Active Listening Practice
5 minutes per rotation
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What are our Typical Group Communication Patterns?
Think of a normal business meeting situation you
face on a frequent basis:
- problem solving meetings
- decision making meetings
- status meetings
What words would you use to describe the
communication that takes place in these meetings?
DISCUSSION
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Aspects of Discussion
• Evaluative
• A process of telling
• Justification of a position as “right”
• Hearing individual points of view to determine
the best one
• Action
• Solving or fixing
• Persuasion
• Examining separate parts
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What is Dialogue?
Dialogue is…
- “shared inquiry, a way of thinking and
reflecting together”
- “a conversation with a center, not sides”
- William Isaacs
(Dialogue and the Art of Thinking Together)
It is based on an openness and cooperative awareness in
which the objective is not to present and defend opinions, but
to look at opinions in the light of integrating diverse
perspectives.
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Goals of Dialogue
• Learning
• Understanding
• Synthesizing
• Exploring
• Creating
• Investigating assumptions
• “Undiscussibles” become discussible
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Dialogue – How Do You Do It?
• Suspend assumptions
• Suspend judgment
• Slow down the inquiry
• Observe yourself; observe
the group
• Let ideas build upon one
another
• Befriend polarization
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Open Communication and Idea Exchange
ADVOCACY INQUIRY
“the art of making quality
statements” “the art of asking quality
questions”
• sharing your knowledge
• proposing an idea
• delivering feedback
• seeking out knowledge
• soliciting ideas from others
• receiving feedback
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The Art of Advocacy and Inquiry A
dvo
cac
y
“I’m explaining.”
“You’re imposing!”
“I’m interviewing.”
“You’re interrogating!”
Inq
uir
y
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Advocacy and Inquiry Skills
ADVOCATE
1. State your view.
2. Provide directly observable data.
3. Give your reasoning.
4. Publicly test your assumptions.
5. Reveal where you are least clear in your reasoning.
INQUIRE
1. Invite reactions.
2. Ask others to make their view explicit.
3. Explain your reason for inquiring.
4. Check your understanding.
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Effective Advocacy and Inquiry
Effective
Ineffective
Advocacy Inquiry
Explains steps in thinking
Gives specific data
Doesn’t explain thinking
Doesn’t give specific data
Seeks others’ or alternative views and counter-examples Probes views of others Encourages examination of my view
Seeks confirming views and examples Asks leading questions Doesn’t encourage examination of my view
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Advocacy and Inquiry – What does it sound like?
• Work with your Action Learning Group.
• Develop examples (actual phrases) that might
demonstrate effective advocacy or effective inquiry.
• Do the same for ineffective advocacy or inquiry.
Action Learning 5 – Advocacy/Inquiry Stock Phrases
10 minutes
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Balancing Advocacy and Inquiry to Manage Conflict
ADVOCACY INQUIRY
Uncovering shared meaning ...
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Balancing Advocacy and Inquiry to Manage Conflict
INQUIRY
Uncovering shared meaning ...
What I Want
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Balancing Advocacy and Inquiry to Manage Conflict
Uncovering shared meaning ...
What I Want What You Want
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Balancing Advocacy and Inquiry to Manage Conflict
What I Want What You Want
Common Ground
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Balancing Advocacy and Inquiry to Manage Conflict
1. Describe the conflict to develop a consolidated
statement of the core issues.
2. Identify the benefits of reaching agreement versus the
consequences of not.
3. Seek the other party’s position (Inquire).
4. Give your point of view (Advocate).
5. Brainstorm ways everyone’s needs can be met.
6. Choose one alternative as a tentative solution.
7. Decide how each party will know if the solution is
working.
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When at an Impasse…
Focus on the data
Look for information that will help
people move forward
Consider each person’s mental
model as a piece of the larger
puzzle
Don’t settle for ‘agreeing to
disagree’
“What do we know for a fact?” or “What
don’t we know?”
“What do we agree upon?”
“Are we starting from two very different
assumptions? Where do they come
from?”
“I don’t understand the assumptions
underlying our disagreement”
What to Do What to Say
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LUNCH
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The Impact of Thinking Preferences
There are many ways to look at the diversity
of individuals’ preferences
and the impact of these preferences on communication.
One way: Thinking Style Preferences
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The Impact of Thinking Preferences
Thinking Style Preferences
What we pay attention to
What / How we learn
What engages us
How we communicate
How we do business
What we are successful at
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Brain Dominance
Brain Dominance
Preferences that
influence thinking style
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Thinking Style Preferences
• Complete the Interaction Style questionnaire and score your
results.
Action Learning 6 – Interaction Style Assessment
15 minutes individual
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Management Style Dimensions
• Four Different & Distinct Styles
• Your behavior is predictable to
your style
• Population equally divides into
about 25% for each style
• Understanding other styles
allows you to ‘flex’ your
communication techniques
Relater Expresser
Director Analyzer
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Action-Orientation Dimension
This is a continuum - many people fall some where in between
Inquire Advocate
Do you TELL? Do you ASK?
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Emotion-Orientation Dimension
This is a continuum - many people fall some where in between
Emotive
Reserved
Do you show
Emotion?
Do you
conceal
emotion?
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Relater
• Perceived as calm, unruffled and
easy to approach.
• Keenly involved in what others say
and do.
• Typically good listeners, able to
delve deeply into what others say.
• Feel it is import to deliver high-
quality products.
• Their slower approach may be
mistaken for lack of interest or lack
of sense of urgency.
• Can be perceived as lacking strong
opinions as they are not among the
first to speak in a group.
Relater Calm
Approachable
Supportive
Loyal
Empathic
Sharing
Focus on team
Good Listeners
Emotive
Reserved
Advocate
Inquire
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Expresser
• Perceived as hopeful, fun to be
with, enthusiastic and playful.
• Want recognition and their
emotional highs and lows are
shaped as from this recognition.
• Receptive to change, initiate and
motivate others with their charm.
• Quick decision-makers.
• Dislike routine, a slow pace, and
needless details
• Strong project initiators, but may fall
short in completing the necessary
details.
• Tend to trust people quickly.
Creative
Enthusiastic
Humorous
Playful
Receptive to change
Focus on vision not details
Initiators
Emotive
Reserved
Advocate
Inquire
Expresser
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Analyzer
• Perceived as reasonable, formal,
and task oriented.
• Attention to detail and
thoroughness are important.
• Objective and systematic.
• Like to control their tasks and work
hard to avoid any mistakes.
• Seen as cautious in decision-
making because they desire all the
information before they make any
decision.
• Can be seen as shy individuals who
hesitate to speak their mind.
Reasonable
Precise
Thorough
Rational
Controlled
Formal
Task Oriented
Emotive
Reserved
Advocate
Inquire
Analyzer
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Director
• Perceived as people who take
charge and get the job done.
• Results are crucial to them and
that’s what they focus on. Can be
demanding in their drive for results.
• Tend to think independently and
know what needs to be done
• Systematic organization or work
help to achieve the quantity and
quality of results.
• Appreciate a stimulating problem to
use logical analysis.
• Seen as self-confident and
determine. Can be perceived that
results are only thing that matters.
Director
Emotive
Reserved
Advocate
Inquire
Decisive
Take charge
Candid
Efficient
Results-Oriented
Pragmatic
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Style Flexing – Developing skills to ease
communication across quadrants
1
3
2 4
Knowing your co-
worker’s style can
help you adjust your
behavior to match
their preferred style
and ultimately improve
communication
productivity!
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Thinking Style Preferences
• Move to a corner of the room with others having the strongest
quadrant preference as you.
• As an Action Learning Group, discuss the following question,
being prepared to present the results of your discussion to the rest
of us:
- What are the things you’d want people to consider when
working and communicating with someone with strong
preferences in the three other different quadrants?
- What is your group’s ideal car?
Action Learning 7 – Quadrant Groupings
30 minutes
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Thinking Style Preferences
• Develop a plan for what to say to the other three thinking style
groups based on their communication preferences for the
following scenarios:
– Deliver bad news
– Persuade them to buy something
– Resolve a conflict between two co-workers – one with your thinking style
preference and one from each of the other 3 types
Action Learning 8 – Working with Others in Action
30 minutes
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Thinking Style Preferences
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BREAK
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Diverse Influencers
Our Frames of Reference
What are the things that influence “who we are” as communicators?
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Frames of Reference
• Work with an Action Learning Group at a flipchart to
draw a frame of reference, labeled with as many
specific categories that might be influencing
someone as a communicator.
• Then work individually to complete a frame, labeled
with specific contributors to your communication
frame of reference.
Action Learning 9 – What are the Frames?
10 minutes with Group
5 minutes individual
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Communication Roles
Communication Roles – the “hats we wear” when
communicating
Brainstorm a list of the various roles we take on during
communication…
What are some dysfunctional communication roles you have
observed (or exhibited)?
What roles are you most comfortable taking on and why?
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Communication Roles
Roles that enhance communication:
Process Roles
- Facilitator
- Harmonizer
- Encourager
- Tension Reliever
Task Roles
- Proposer
- Summarizer
- Devil’s Advocate
- Clarifyer
- Information Seeker
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Communication Roles
• We will experience a group discussion on a topic
selected by the group.
• Communication role cards will be handed out randomly
to some participants. (Some may be dysfunctional
roles!)
• Your task is to participate in the discussion while
attempting to fulfill the communication role on your
card.
Action Learning 10 – Practicing the Roles
10 minute discussion
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Communication Roles
Why is it important to the effectiveness of
the communication process to be aware of
communication roles?
What can we do to enhance
communication through this awareness?
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Barriers of Interpersonal Communication
What happens “behind the scenes”
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Roger and Elaine Activity
“Do you realize that, as of tonight,
we’ve been seeing each other
for exactly six months?”
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Roger and Elaine
Elaine: “Do you realize that, as of tonight, we’ve been seeing
each other for exactly six months?” … “Roger..”
Roger: “What?”
Elaine: “Please don’t torture yourself like this. Maybe I should
never have .. Oh God, I feel so…”
Roger: “What?”
Elaine: “I’m such a fool. I mean, I know there’s no knight. I really
know that. It’s silly. There’s no knight, and there’s no
horse.”
Roger: “There’s no horse?”
Elaine: “You think I’m a fool, don’t you?”
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Roger and Elaine
Roger: “No.”
Elaine: “It’s just that .. It’s that I .. I need some time.”
Roger: “Yes.”
Elaine: “Oh, Roger. Do you really feel that way?”
Roger: “What way?”
Elaine: “That way about time.”
Roger: “Oh. Yes.”
Elaine: “Thank you, Roger.”
Roger: “Thank you.”
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Roger and Elaine
Huh??
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Left Hand Column / Right Hand Column
Left Hand Column Right Hand Column
What was
said...
What I was
thinking,
but did not say...
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Left Hand Column / Right Hand Column
Why do we stay in the Right Hand Column?
Why is it important to know the difference between what
we are thinking and what we are saying?
How can we constructively reveal and share what’s in
the Left Hand Column? (When do we not want to?)
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Left Hand Column / Right Hand Column
Left Hand Column Right Hand Column
That’s very interesting. I disagree.
We have an opportunity. You have a problem.
“Management Speak” The Translation
You obviously put a lot of
work into this.
This is awful.
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Left Hand Column / Right Hand Column
Left Hand Column Right Hand Column
Help me to understand… I don’t know what you’re
talking about, and I don’t
think you do either.
I’d like your buy-in on
this.
I want someone else to
blame when this thing
bombs.
“Management Speak” The Translation
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Ladder of Inference
ACTION
Pool of Data and Experiences
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Ladder of Inference
ACTION
Pool of Data and Experiences
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Ladder of Inference
Pool of Data and Experiences
Select Data
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Ladder of Inference
Pool of Data and Experiences
Select Data
Add Meaning
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Ladder of Inference
Pool of Data and Experiences
Select Data
Add Meaning
Make Assumptions
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Ladder of Inference
Pool of Data and Experiences
Select Data
Add Meaning
Make Assumptions
Draw Conclusions
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Ladder of Inference
Pool of Data and Experiences
Select Data
Add Meaning
Make Assumptions
Draw Conclusions
Adopt Beliefs
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Ladder of Inference
ACTION
Pool of Data and Experiences
Select Data
Add Meaning
Make Assumptions
Draw Conclusions
Adopt Beliefs
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Ladder of Inference
Pool of Data and Experiences
Select Data
Add Meaning
Make Assumptions
Draw Conclusions
Adopt Beliefs
ACTION
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The Competency Ladder
Unconscious Incompetence
Conscious Incompetence
Conscious Competence
Unconscious Competence
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Developing Competency Through
Learning and Growth
Discover
Act Reflect
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Developing Competency Through
Learning and Growth
Discover
Act Reflect
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Session Wrap-Up
• Return to personal self assessment on communication goals
completed at the beginning of the course.
• Reflect back on your evaluation and your growth throughout
the day.
• What will you take away from this course? How can you apply
it to your workplace?
10 minutes