MediationWorks Newsletter 2011

Peer Mediators Issy Joe and Ben (Yr 6) assist Nicola with her problem at Riverview School, Kerikeri, Northland

Cool Schools Peer Mediation Programme Newsletter

Term Two 2011

Planning for Peace Week 2011Wellington Secondary Schools Symposium 2011NEW Primary School Resources NOW availableArticles from Schools… and MORE

In this issue…

EditorialEditorial

Greetings Cool Schools!I do hope you like the new name of our newsletter… MediationWorks. There is a powerful message in this name and for those of us who have been in the game a while, we know it rings true! You will also notice a new Cool Schools logo and our sig-nature colours have changed too. Nothing like a fresh, new image to mark the positive developments with the programme.

Cool Schools is alive and well. We have had some interesting publicity over the last few months with the focus on bully-ing issues in the media.

Jonnie Black, our Maori Programme C o - o rd i n a to r a n d Yo u t h Wi n g Chairperson, was interviewed by Greg Boyed on TVNZ 7’s 8p.m. NEWS. The Deputy Head Boy (a senior peer media-tor) from De la Salle College and a female student from Selwyn College were inter-viewed live on TVNZ’s Breakfast Show the following morning. The N.Z. Herald’s cover story on bullying (26th March) “To fight or not to fight? … It’s Okay to Tell”... featured two Mt Roskill Grammar advanced peer mediators explaining how their service helps students to feel safe. “We are social justice activists in our school promoting and modelling fairness and respect for others, watching out for harass-ment and bullying and supporting students to get help when needed.”

These are examples of the media cov-erage we received during March and April which highlighted the Secondary Cool Schools Peer Mediation Programme and its positive, pro-active impact on support-ing students to help provide a safe phys-ical and emotional school environment and the prevention of bullying.

The ‘X-factor’ surrounding these media eye opportunities is that the student peer mediators themselves are telling their suc-cess stories to the N.Z. public.

During this ‘hot media attention’ time, The Peace Foundation sent a let-ter to Education Minister, Anne Tolley, asking her to look at reinstating fund-ing for the Cool Schools Peer Mediation Programme (withdrawn in December 2009). Her response was that the Ministry has made a huge financial commitment to the Positive Behaviour for Learning Action Plan (PB4L) and that is where the priority lies for the meantime.

The good news is that we have schools on the PB4L contract using their funding to support and implement school wide positive behaviour initiatives such as Cool Schools. Quote from a Deputy Principal in Northland:

“The Cool Schools Programme, linked to peer mediation, its peaceful conflict resolu-tion skills training and school wide imple-mentation, certainly addresses an identified need linked to students and staff under-standing the whole process of mediation as an effective strategy to support conflict/mis-understanding resolution. This makes fund-ing it from our PB4L contract both logical and meaningful as well as fitting within the expenditure criteria.”

Apart from training in schools, a lot of my time over the last two terms has been spent in up-dating the primary programme resources. These resources include:

� The Primary Manual (Edition 5), new, revised, updated, teacher user friendly

� The Essential Peer Mediator’s Handbook – for school mediators – aligns with the new manual

� A2 Posters x 3 – supports and aligns with the new manual

� Cool Schools Co-ordinator’s Kit – Edition 2 – USB Stick – practical, user friendly

(Refer to pages 12 – 15 for more details on these new resources).

This has been a very rewarding proc-ess. I am delighted that our Primary Cool School Peer Mediation Programme is now refreshed with effective, quality resources that compliment and align with the robust teacher training. My next goal is working on developing the secondary programme resources so that they align with the up-dated secondary student training.

May I take this opportunity to ack-nowledge Toni Ingram, the project man-ager/contributing editor and Tamara Nyholt, Director of Maisonette Design Studio, for the time and effort they have put into developing these primary pro-gramme resources. Both ladies are creative

and skilled professionals, the results of their great work, you can observe in the quality of the products produced.

A huge thankyou to Sue Tregurtha, who was the Cool Schools administra-tion assistant for sixteen years! Those of you who have rung The Peace Foundation would have spoken to Sue. She leaves her position to pursue other directions. We wish her all the very best on her journey.

I would like to say how much I enjoyed being a guest speaker at the inaugural Wellington Secondary School Symposium held on Thursday 14th April.

This event was well organised by Leah Rothman and Lynn Scott with guest speakers and students from six second-ary schools sharing ideas and exper-tise throughout the day. I am hoping our Auckland Secondary School Symposium on Friday 19th August (Week 3, Term 3) will be as successful.Lastly, a major event on the horizon com-ing up… Peace Week 2011… Monday 8th – Friday 12th August, Week 2, Term 3! Our theme this year is Sports4Peace. This is relevant with New Zealand hosting the Rugby World Cup in September and October. Peace Week is a superb oppor-tunity for peer mediators to demonstrate their leadership skills and to be pro-active. They can be planning activities NOW that will be actioned during Peace Week. Mediators can organise and facilitate these activities. This really helps to raise peer mediator profile within the school com-munity. (Refer to “Planning for Peace Week 2011” on page 10 for more details).

MediationWorks is bigger and brighter than previous newsletters. A BIG THANKS to all those who contributed. Your arti-cles are awesome and help make it a ‘Cool Schools Community’ newsletter. Much appreciated.Happy mediating…Christina Barruel Cool Schools National Trainer

Our Primary Cool School Peer Mediation Programme is now refreshed with effective, quality resources that compliment and align with the robust teacher training.

Christina Barruel Cool Schools National Trainer

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School Stories

Elm Park SChoolPakuranga, Auckland

Peer mediation 2011We are writing to tell you about this amaz-ing programme that we are running in our school. The Cool School’s Peer Mediation Programme has been running at Elm Park School for approximately 9 years.

We have been peer mediators for 2 years at Elm Park School. We always wanted to be peer mediators because we always wanted to help people and to learn how to become ‘peace keepers’. We all wanted to become leaders in our school. Learning these skills has helped us to achieve greater things like becoming house captains, school councillors and wet day monitors.

We think peer mediation is really impor-tant for our school because it helps solve problems in our school and encourages us to all get along together. Most people think that peer mediators are on duty to solve others problems. BUT we don’t! We are there to get other students on track and to help them to solve their own problems by assisting them to come up with their own solutions.

All classes in our school are learning ways to help solve problems and that is helping our job in the playground, as other students are understanding more about what our role is.

Peer mediation has helped us to solve problems at home with our brothers and sis-ters and has given us the skills to keep calm for a longer time.

We think that schools without peer medi-ators would have more fights and maybe even BULLYING which NOBODY wants! We hope

that one day every school in New Zealand will have peer mediators to help solve prob-lems and to make school a happy and peace-ful place for everyone!!By Eve Koenders, Grace Koroa and Briana Worsfold ( Year 6 Peer Mediators)

kElSton GirlS CollEGEHenderson, West Auckland

advanced Peer mediation training at kelston Girls’ College… a Student’s PerspectiveThe peer mediation advanced training was an awesome experience. I learnt about the different ways people deal with conflict. I now know how to deal with conflicts in a constructive manner. I enjoyed the roleplay activities, it was a great way to put into prac-tice what we had learnt. I know that hav-ing these mediation skills will enable me to help others by passing on my knowledge of peaceful conflict resolution. It’s a great pro-gramme and our school is very privileged to have access to it. By Chanelle Maree Lucas (Head Girl)

manGErE CEntral SChoolSouth Auckland

Pretty in PinkAnother successful Pink Shirt Day at Mangere Central School. April 14th 2011 started as any other day with one slight dif-ference, everyone was wearing pink! Why? We all wore pink on this day to show that our school is a school that is against bullying!

With school bullies flooding the media, this day couldn’t have come at a better time. We as a school make a big deal of Pink Shirt Day, not just to look extra cool but to show that taking a stand for something we have all been a part of at one time in our lives is important.

Here’s what some of our mediators thought…“Pink Shirt Day makes me think of bullies and what they do to other people. This day is about helping others and standing up for what is right.” – Bryston Takinui (Year 8 Mediator)

“Pink Shirt Day was cool because my friend and I got to wear our pyjamas to school for a good cause. A school without bullying is a safe learning environment and that is how we see our school.” – Juliana Akui (Year 8 Mediator)

“We can all do our part.” – Renski Christians (Teacher Co-ordinator, Mangere Central School)

“Pink Day was awesome because it was good to see a lot of people supporting our stand against bullying. It was also good to see peo-ple walking the talk.” – Monica Iakopo (Year 8 Mediation Manager)


School Stories

ranui Primary SChoolWest Auckland

SaCrEd hEart CollEGELower Hutt, Wellington

MalO leleilei,My name is Victoria Mapa. I am 10 years old. I have been a mediator at Ranui School for over a year now. When I first started I was really amazed because I didn’t know what a mediator was. But when I was chosen to be a mediator I was happy because I could help other children learn to solve their own prob-lems. I knew I would meet other kids and make new friends. We had a training day where we learnt all about how to help chil-dren solve their own problems. Then we had a Cool Schools Road Show where we went and did role plays to each syndicate. We were nervous but Whaea Del gave us lots of treats to keep us going. It was cool.

On Friday’s, every second week, Ranui School has an assembly. We give out the Cool Schools mediator wristbands. All the children love them. Two mediators sit at the front of the hall and draw names out of a hat. Children can get their names into the hat by being spotted doing a good deed or if we hear children using kind and caring words to each other. The child who earns the most wrist bands will earn a special prize at the end of the term from Whaea Del our team leader.

Whaea Del’s role is keeping mediators focused and on track with each other. She also organises morning tea parties every Monday morning for the mediators. We share our stories and help each other with ideas.. We have a head mediator and a dep-uty head mediator. They organise people to do your duty if you are away.

I like being a mediator. I am proud of the job I do. I know I am helping make our school a happy school to be in.By Victoria Mapa (10 years) Year 6

My naMe iS TuTu and i aM in year 6 at Ranui School.

Being a mediator at Ranui School is awe-some because it will make Ranui School a better school for kids to go to. I have been a mediator for 3 months now. Sometimes being a mediator is difficult because I want to go and play. But I don’t! Every time I go on mediation duty with my partner, he and I have to look for a child who is playing nicely and being respectful then they get a Mediator’s Certificate and their name goes into a draw for cool prizes.

We wear mediator vests, and hats and carry clip boards with the reminders on what to say when children come to us with a prob-lem. We use notebooks to write down what we have done. We give out certificates to chil-dren we spot making wonderful playground

choices. Whaea Del told us , if there’s a huge problem, we have to tell a duty teacher – it is not our job to sort those big ones out. At our school we have 26 mediators.

Mediators are helping to make Ranui School a happy, healthy, harmonious and high achieving school. I love being a media-tor and helping other children. It is cool.By Tutu Moloti (10 years)


School Stories

rivErviEw Primary SChoolBay of Islands

Being a Cool Schools mediatorHi. My name is Issy Joe, and I’m a Cool Schools Peer Mediator at Riverview Primary School in the Bay of Islands.

Being a mediator is something to be proud of at Riverview School. Mediators at our school take care of all the students, from 5 to 11 years. We help sort out problems in a way that is good for the mediators and the people who are having the problem.

I was a peer mediator in 2010, and this year I’m getting out and about around school doing what I have been trained to do. As a mediator we don’t solve problems. We help other students to solve their own problems through a mediation process.

Mediators walk confidently around the school grounds wearing bright yellow vests so children know that we are mediators. If children have a problem we take them to a quiet spot and do our best to help them. I have learnt that being a mediator is like being a role model to all those children who look up to us. I do my job both in the classroom and out in the playground. We don’t guar-antee that children’s problems will be fixed, but we do our best and we try. At our school we have a set of values called HEARTWISE, where each letter stands for a particular

value. H is for honesty, E is for excellence, A is for aroha, R is for respect, T is for tolerance, W is for whanau, I is for inquiry, S is for sus-tainability and E is for effort.

Mediators show these values and try their best to look after the school, and children so that we have a happy and safe school.

Hi, My naMe iS Ben and i aM 9 yearS old, a Year 6, and I go to Riverview Primary School. I’ve been a Peer Mediator for two years now, and I really enjoy being one. I am proud to be a caring and helpful mediator.

Being a Peer Mediator to me, means a lot of good things. I get to meet new children in our school, especially the juniors. I also, get to walk around the school and see all of my friends playing around the school. I enjoy helping people to solve their own problems. That’s a good feeling for me. It also helps me to solve my problems easier. It’s also a great

way for me to show HEARTWISE to oth-ers (which are our school values, Honesty, Excellence, Respect, Tolerance, Whanau, Inquiry, Sustainability and Effort.)

Because I did the Peer Mediation training last year, this year when it was time to train again, I got really excited because the train-ing was helpful to me as I saw what children like and what are good ways to deal with con-flict. It was also lots of fun, because Christina was funny and played lots of games with us. After the training, it made me feel confident and ready to help other people. This train-ing is good for me too because I am usually quite shy, but now I know I can help the chil-dren in my school and I know my job is really important because it helps our school to be a safe and friendly school. It also helps the teachers not have to deal with little problems and they are free to help with bigger issues if they happen.

The part I like the best (apart from help-ing people sort a problem out) is when we can reward children for doing good things in the playground. They like it when we say well done and when we give PEACE wrist bands in assembly.

I’m really proud that I have been selected to be a peer mediator at Riverview School. I love working with and helping people and the skills that I have learnt, I will be able to use when I grow up. It’s a cool job and I would tell anyone to apply for the job at school so you can have the experience that I am hav-ing and learn the skills that I am learning.By Ben Gaualofa

whanGarEi hEadS Northland

whangarei heads is a Cool School!We have been spending the term in Room One learning about how to resolve problems in and around our school. We have built up a great toolbox of skills that will help us later on in life. The best part of the training was the games that helped us work as a team and share our ideas. The new school peer media-tors introduced peer mediation to the school at an assembly where we performed a cool song and did a skit to show how the medi-ation process works. The rest of the school loved it, so did we. We have all had problems to deal with and have enjoyed helping kids solve their problems.

Students have found the peer mediators useful as mediators give them support and everyone wins. We are the senior class of the school and the responsibility has been good for us. We hope to train up other students as the year goes on. It’s funny; the duty teacher has an easy job now as we help solve all the small conflicts in our school.By Room One students.

“It feels good to help other people” Ziggy Groneveld (peer mediator).

“You feel good about yourself when you help others, and they respect you for helping” Craig Linch, (peer mediator)

“It is good to know that peer mediators are out there in the playground to give help if I need it.” Lucus (student)

“Mediation is an easier way to solve a prob-lem without being told off” Leo (student)

“The mediators are organised and have a good routine” Tiare (student)


Events

wellington Secondary School Symposium 2011THe firST WellingTOn SeCOndary School Symposium was a phenomenal suc-cess! The Peace Foundation had 31 students representing 6 different schools from across the Wellington region. Schools included: Taita College, Wellington High School, Sacred Heart College, St Peters College, Kapati College and Paraparaumu College. It was a great day for meeting other secondary school peer mediators, learning and getting to know each other through group activities and games.

The day wove school presentations, key speakers and workshops into the themes of: Mediate for YOUth: Speak! Lead! Flourish! These themes are about mediators standing up for young people facing conflict – start-ing with themselves. Peer mediators learnt about conflict and how to resolve it peace-fully; preventing violence within themselves, their personal lives, school peers and wider communities.

Guest speakers included a representa-tive from the Police Department, discussing the types of bullying that occur across New Zealand, and consequences that perpetrators can face. Peace Foundation volunteer Jonnie Black spoke about how he transitioned from bully to peacemaker. Oliver Christeller looked at mediation after school, tying in his personal and professional mediation experiences. Human Rights in Education’s Ced Simpson showed us how Motueka High School has rev-olutionized and entwined human rights into their school system and Alyn Ware talked to his experiences as a mediator at an interna-tional and political level.

The symposium then participated in work-shops exploring how to generate solutions, the declaration of human rights, and key dates throughout the year. This ended in a grand finale with schools sitting down to brainstorm and plan their year ahead. Some fantastic ideas were generated, with all schools taking different approaches on how they intend to interact with the programme key events and their peers at school – all six schools sound like they have an exciting year ahead!

Students said of the symposium:“We can use this information to better the

outer community”“We learnt consistent lessons which inspired

new ideas”“I would like to bring the ideas I learnt

today back to my college”“I believe the symposium has given me skills

I can use in the future”

“It was interesting and has opened my eyes to how commonly mediation is used”

“I learnt about the greater implications of mediation in our society”.

A massive thank you to the John Ilott Charitable Trust for providing funding for the symposium! Without the Trust, this day would not have happened. Students and coor-dinators would not have had the opportunity to learn and share experiences and ideas with each other. Thanks also to Christina Barruel and Jonnie Black for taking the time to come down to Wellington to participate

– your contribution was invaluable!And lastly, a huge THANKS to the peer

mediators and coordinators. The Peace Foundation is proud that there are such fantastic peace ambassadors as you in Wellington schools. The symposium is surely a testament to the year ahead becoming one where conflict is handled with compassion and peaceful resolution in Taita College, Wellington High School, Sacred Heart College, St Peters College, Kapati College and Paraparaumu College.by Leah Rothman (Symposium Co-ordinator)

Symposium co-ordinators, Leah Rothman (right) and Lynn Scott (centre left) with Peace Foundation guest speakers, Jonnie Black (left) and Christina Barruel (centre right)

Symposium Snapshots

Events

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trainings in Schools



training

Participants at the effective Communication Skills Team Training

From left to right: Lisa Gibson, Jonnie Black, Elena Kyotsgova, Caroline Ongleo, Andrew Cowie, Christina Barruel, Mike O’Hagan and seated, Andrea O’Hagan

SP

ORTS 4 PEACE

Peace is our g

oal


Events

“Imagine all the people living life in peace. You may say I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one. I hope someday you’ll join us, and the world will live as one.” JOHN LENNON

PeaCe Week iS a naTiOnal Week designed especially to help schools educate students about peace issues. Peace education is about helping students to understand and manage conflict in their own lives and from a greater perspective learning how peace is fostered both nationally and internationally.

Peace Week is an ideal opportunity for peer mediators to be proactive in their school. They can plan, organize and facilitate activi-ties that will help make them visible. This is valuable for both promotion and building a positive profile of the peer mediation service, especially with other students.

Peace Week can be coordinated in many different ways. It will depend on your school’s passion and focus around peace education as to how much time and energy is given towards

the activities. The following is a list of activity ideas used by schools in the past. Hopefully, your team of mediators will be motivated and supported to plan for at least one activity dur-ing EACH DAY of Peace Week.

The first thing to do is to hold a meet-ing with ALL mediators in the school team. Brainstorm what you can do as a school to celebrate Peace Week. When you have cho-sen which Peace Week activities you want to do, break off into sub-committees. Keep in mind that some activities (such as the assembly presentation) require more people. When choosing activities and subcommittees, ensure that you take on a realistic goal.

When you meet as a sub-committee, plan a detailed outline of your event. Who, what, when, where, why are very important ques-tions to answer.

For more information go to: www.peace.net.nz – click on Events and then Peace Week

Effective Communication Skills team trainingin aPril Our TeaM Of TrainerS fOr the Parents Effective Communication Skills Programme met for a one day workshop. This was a milestone meeting marking the completion of the first year of delivering the Effective Communication Skills programme in its new format. Our administration team from the Aotearoa Peace Foundation joined us for the day. It was a very valuable day. The team undertook a review of the programme to ensure the programme continues to meet the needs of the participants. We shared learnings and successes we have experienced in delivering the programme over the past 12 months and we had a valuable session led by Andrew Cowie giving an overview of his speciality area of providing information for parents on keeping their children safe in

the ‘cyber-world’. In the afternoon the team participated in a professional development workshop led by Arteshar Mai Rah.

In the first year of delivery, we have had over 200 participants attend and the feed-back is overwhelmingly positive and grateful for the opportunity to learn communication skills that are practical, sensible and make a difference in families. We look forward to

the coming year and look forward to hear-ing from schools wanting to offer their par-ent community this opportunity to improve and enhance the quality of their relationship with their children.

Andrea O’HaganCo-developer and trainerEffective Communication Skills Programme

Planning For Peace week 2011Theme: SPOrTS4PeaCe

monday 8th – Friday 12th auGuSt 2011 (wEEk 2, tErm 3)

Tried-n-True

Peace Week Activities(for Secondary and Primary Schools)

1. Assembly Presentation

2. Peace Week Banner

3. Competitions (especially The Peace Foundation’s 2011 contests)

4. T-Shirts

5. Face painting

6. White Ribbons for students

7. Peace Bracelets

8. Wear White Day

9. Guest Speaker

10. Peace Garden

11. Peace Cranes (origami)

12. Tabloid Sports Afternoon

13. Community Outreach

14. Peace Passports

15. Peer mediators Promotion of Service – Class Visits

Please place these dates in your diary nOW!

notices

national Peace week 2011 whEn: Monday 8th – Friday 12th August (Week 2, Term 3, 2011)

2011 auckland Secondary Schools Symposium whEn: Friday 19th August(Week 3, Term 3, 2011) vEnuE: Western Springs Garden Community Hall

auckland Primary teachers Cool Schools training workshop whEn: Friday 2nd September, from 9.00am – 3.30pm (Week 5, Term 3, 2011) whErE: Boardroom, Level 1, Problem Gambling Foundation Building, 128 Khyber Pass Road, Newmarket, Auckland. CoSt: $170 (incl GST) per person which includes; 5.5 hour training, orientation through the NEW resources now available, helpful handouts, morning tea and lunch. Great value!

who Should attEnd: Cool Schools co-ordinators and teachers who have not had the updated, revised training (within the last three years), new staff members of schools who have had recent training, co-ordinators who need a refresher course and familiarisation with the new resources now available, school management interested in future implementation. intErEStEd: Email [email protected]

Cool Schools network meetings 2011 whEn: (Dates and venues to be confirmed) whErE: South Auckland, Hamilton, Hawkes Bay

Peer mediators’ Big day out whEn: Term 4 whErE: East Auckland region

Cool Schools newsletters 2011 and 2012due dates for article contributions

2011 | Edition 2: due by Friday 26th August (Week 4, Term 3, 2011)

2012 | Edition 1: due by Friday 25th May (Week 5, Term 2, 2012)

Please can we have all articles, reports, letters, poems, photos, profiles, etc. emailed to: [email protected]

trainer Contact detailsname area Phone / mobile Fax Email

Jonnie BlackMaori Programme Co-ordinator

Auckland, Northland 09 373 2379021 0581700

09 379 2668 [email protected]

Christina BarruelCS National Trainer (Pri/Sec)

Auckland, Northland, Waikato, Coromandel, Taranaki, Hawkes Bay

09 373 2379027 2729331

09 379 2668 [email protected]

andrea o’hagan(Pri/Sec/PP Trainer)

Bay of Plenty, Central Plateau, East Cape, Wairoa, Gisborne, Rotorua

07 307 9085027 7112072

[email protected]

lynn Scott (Pri/Sec) Wellington, Wairarapa, Whanganui, Nelson, Manawatu

04 3846613027 5423665

[email protected]

Carolyne Smith (Pri) Otago, Southland 03 454 6966027 2228887

[email protected]

tracy Scott (Pri/Sec) Canterbury, Christchurch, West Coast, Marlborough, North Otago

03 384 3336021 559575

[email protected]

Elena kostyugova (Parent Programme Trainer

Auckland 021 934323 [email protected]

lisa Gibson (Parent Programme Trainer)


alaria Papaconstatinou (Parent Programme Trainer)


mal winnie (Parent Programme Trainer)


notices:Upcoming Events


the resource CupboardGive your Cool Schools Peer Mediation Programme a boost with our fantastic NEW resources!

To complement this new manual we also have the revised Coordinator’s Kit available. This consists of additional information, forms, templates, power point presentations etc. on a USB stick. All designed to make a Coordinator’s job much easier. $35

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Teaching Process

WArM upSelect a warm up activity from the Warm Ups, Energisers and Cooperative Games selection. A sharing circle exploring things students appreciate or that make them happy would be a positive way to start this topic. Alternatively a ‘getting to know one another’ activity if it is a newly formed group of students.

iNTrODuCTiON

What is conflict?1. As a class or small group discuss and define the term conflict.

Conflict• A disagreement between two or more people.

• Conflict is a normal part of life.

• Conflict happens when your needs are different from the needs of somebody else.

• Conflict can be positive or negative — it depends on how you handle it.

• Conflict can be a positive force for personal growth and helping things work better.

2. Brainstorm ‘When I get into an argument I tend to…’

Think of when you might argue with your brother, sister, parent or friend. Record the ideas on the whiteboard.

• What do you notice about many of the words?

• Underline the negative contributions.

• Why are many of the words negative? Often due to our experiences of conflict in the past — negative experiences often relate to destructive ways of dealing with conflict.

DESTruCTivE AND CONSTruCTivE WAyS OF DEALiNG WiTh CONFLiCT

1. Either brainstorm or list: Destructive Ways of Dealing with Conflict and the Costs (see summary chart for ideas)

Possible discussion questions:

• Can we relate to this list?

• Is it similar to some of the words we have brainstormed under ‘When I get into an argument I tend to…’ brainstorm?

SeSSion 1: defining ConfliCt

Learning IntentionsStudents will:

• Define what conflict means.

• Explore destructive and constructive ways of dealing with conflict.

Resources• Whiteboard or large pieces of paper

and pens.

• Key messages handout (optional).

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Conflict does not have to be like this, there are other choices we can make when dealing with conflict.

2. Brainstorm or list: Constructive Ways of Dealing with Conflict and the Benefits.

3. Compare the Costs and Benefits lists — what is a statement you can make in one sentence that summarises what you are observing?

For example:

• The benefits of dealing with conflict in a constructive way far out way the costs of dealing with a conflict in a destructive way.

• Destructive destroys relationships. Constructive builds relationships.

4. Write these statements underneath the ‘Costs verses Benefits’ lists and place this on the wall in the Cool Schools Corner.

DESTruCTivE ways of dealing with conflict

anger

win/lose attitude

maintain fixed positions

blame

violence

accusations

‘you’ statements

COSTS of dealing with conflict

destructively

damages relationships.

Physical, emotional and mental damage.

Prevents individual and group goals being achieved.

wastes time and money.

damages self esteem.

limits personal potential.

CONSTruCTivE ways of dealing with conflict

empathetic listening

win/win attitude

consider needs of both parties

understanding other’s viewpoints

Problem solving approach

options

‘I’ statements

BENEFiTS of dealing with conflict

destructively

enhances relationships

creates an environment for self-growth and achievement

enables individual and group achievement of goals

enables peaceful resolution of problems

enhances self-esteem

note: Violence — when you force yourself over another person and cause harm to get your way.

a violent act can be physical, verbal or emotional.

Violence is not the same as conflict.

Violence is a negative way to deal with conflict.

SuMMAry OF iNFOrMATiON

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Cool Schools Peer mediation Programme – Primary manualWe are pleased to release the new Cool Schools Primary Manual. This manual is an essential resource for Cool Schools Coordinators and classroom teachers at the primary and intermediate school level. It is now double in size and full of new and inter-esting information, tips and activities for implementing and maintaining a successful peer mediation programme.

This 156 page manual comprises of the following three sections:

� Section one provides an overview of the programme, benefits of peer mediation and the relevant links to the New Zealand education curriculum.

� Section two is jammed full of lesson plans and activities designed to teach the medi-ation skills and process. This section cov-ers the 10 key learning areas within this programme and is user friendly for all classroom teachers.

� Section three is of particular relevance to the Cool Schools Coordinator who will be implementing the whole school pro-gramme. It is full of all the practical infor-mation and ideas for implementing and maintaining a successful peer mediation programme in your school.

available now! $75.00the Essential Peer mediator handbookNew 40 page (A5) handbook for primary and intermediate Peer Mediators. This resource is designed to complement your school Peer Mediators training. It is full of information and activities to help your mediators become effective, peaceful and wise owls. This hand-book covers all the learning areas within the Cool Schools Peer Mediation Programme including:

� Understanding conflict � The mediation process � The role of the mediator � Active listening & paraphrasing � Effective questioning � Helping disputants to generate solutions � Handling difficult situations

available in packs of 10 $100packs of 20 $180

Active listening is essential to the mediation process.

� A mediator needs to be a very good listener.

� Active listening helps create an atmosphere where people feel comfortable speaking.

Keys to Good Listening:

Use eye contact where possible.

Active listening

20 Cool SChoolS Peer Mediator’s Handbook

Useful phrases to show you are actively listening

What I am hearing you say is that you feel upset when…

Can you help me understand what you mean when you say...

Can you give me an example of…

It sounds like both of you are concerned about …

Here are some examples. Write some more of your own…

Cool SChoolS Peer Mediator’s Handbook 21

Handbook

Essential

The Cool Schools Peer Mediation Programme is a proactive programme that teaches essential life skills for peaceful conflict resolution. The skills taught in this programme empower individuals to build positive, caring relationships with others especially in times of conflict.

Peer Mediation Programme

Cool Schools Peer M

ediation Programm

e | Primary M

anu

al

A project of The Peace Foundation

‘Cool Schools provides a sound framework for teachers and students to resolve their differences in a positive way’ PrinciPal

‘I have learnt to be more understanding and patient by being a peer mediator’. Student

‘Cool Schools eases up the pressure on teachers. They can refer minor conflicts to the peer mediators on duty who assist their peers to come up with solutions to their problems.’ teacher


resources

new Cool Schools Posters$6 each or purchase all 3 posters for $15

THE

PROCESSMediation

Introduction and Rul�

Reaching Agreement

and Cl�ure

Telling the Problem

Summar�ing

Finding Solutions

www.peace.net.nz

• Introduce yourselves.

• Ask if they agree to mediation—move to quiet area.

• Get agreement to the 4 rules of mediation:

1. No interrupting—you’ll each get a turn

2. No put-downs

3. Be honest

4. Agree to solve the problem together

• Write down solution/s agreed upon

on the Mediation Agreement Form.

• Congratulate both disputants and

arrange checkback.

• Ask Person 1 what happened and how they feel.

• Ask Person 2 what happened and how they feel.

• Ask Person 2—How can you solve this problem?

• What could you do next time so this problem

doesn’t happen again?

• Ask Person 1 to comment on Person 2’s ideas

and to give their own suggestions.

• Ask which suggestions will solve the problem

for them both.

“So the problem is about...”

Retell facts and feelings to each person

Peace�l

www.peace.net.nz

THE Owl...

Collaborat�

Cooperat�

L�tens with understanding

Us� ‘I’ statements

Helps others to solve their own problems

Shows empathy

Communicat� feelings and needs

R�olution

Reach� win/win solutions

Con�ict

A GOOD L�tener…

KEEPS eye contact

ASKSqu�tions

GIVES non-verbalFEEDBACK (head nodding)

GIVES verbalFEEDBACK (uh-huh, okay)

fac�

THE SPEAKER

www.peace.net.nz

Buy 5 sets get 1 set FRee!


resources

Books

adolescent volcanoes

By Éliane Whitehouse and Warwick Pudney. Suitable for parents of children aged 12 – 18.

Divided into two sections, one each for adults and adolescents, this book helps identify and deal with anger and abusive behaviour. It includes activities to teach a range of skills.

$15

a volcano in my tummy helping Children to handle Anger


An exercise-based book to help chil-dren learn to deal with anger and other emotions in a non-damaging way. It teaches effective communi-cation skills, helps raise self-esteem, looks at the hurt, fear and loss behind anger.

$19

thanks not SpanksPractical ways you can make child raising easier and parenting more rewarding

By Mary Cornford. Suitable for parents of children aged 0 – 15.

A suggestion-packed guide on how to raise children using positive meth-ods. Teaches skills to deal with anger and stress and provides 50 alterna-tives to physical punishment for addressing behavioural problems.

$8

the volcano manual A Professional helper’s Guide for Using ‘A Volcano In my Tummy’

By Warwick Pudney. Suitable for people working with children aged 5 – 12.

Based on the insights and experi-ences of teachers who have made who have made extensive use of ‘A Volcano In My Tummy’ (VIMT). This manual is designed to ensure that teachers, counsellors and other professionals working with angry children can make the optimum use of VIMT.

$13

volcanoes: handling anger Interactive CD-ROm–(Based on A Volcano In my Tummy)

Games for children aged 5– 12. Insights and information for teachers, parents, caregivers, anyone and everyone!

At last – a computer game to help reduce violence! This CD-ROM is all about helping children understand their anger, where it comes from and how to handle it well – in an inno-vative and entertaining way. The game features everyday scenarios where children use their judgement to learn how to deal with their anger, the value of cooperation and how to be assertive but not aggressive. The CD-ROM also includes a theory sec-tion – Exploring Anger – as well as the Anger Processor where children can “dissolve” and zoom out” their angry feelings!

$9

little volcanoes Young Children’s Anger and happiness


A practical book that helps teach children to handle their anger in a constructive way. It looks at the causes of anger such as hurt, loss and fear. It helps parents and other car-egivers to help children under 5 to deal more positively with their angry thoughts and feelings.

$12

happier Parenting happier Children: Why You Parent the Way You Do and how You Could Change It

By Éliane Whitehouse.

Why do we parent the way we do? Based on countless parent-ing courses run by the author, this book is full of practical, easily under-stood suggestions, exercises and approaches for parents to enable them to:

• Better understand their parenting style and what factors influence it

• Get clearer insights into the needs of their children at various stages

• Learn to “re-parent” them-selves whilst still parenting their children

• Be positive, effective and happier in this all-important role

$8

learning Peaceful relationships

Edited by The Peace Foundation and Women’s International League for Peace and Freedom. Suitable for ages 5 – 12.

A popular book featuring a pro-gression of activities for primary aged students, promoting commu-nication, co-operation, respect and a peaceful classroom. This was the book that inspired the founding of the Cool Schools Peer Mediation Programme!

$4

SuB total

Postage & Packaging $8.00

total


Books

order FormName:

Address:

Phone: email:

Book Price (inc. GST)

Quantity required

Adolescent Volcanoes $15.00

A Volcano in my Tummy $19.00

Thanks not Spanks $8.00

Volcanoes: Handling anger (CD-rom) $9.00

Book Price inc. GST)

Quantity required

Little Volcano $12.00

The Volcano Manual $13.00

Happier Parenting, Happier Children $8.00

Learning Peaceful Relationships $4.00

Please send this slip along with payment (cheque) to The Peace Foundation, PO Box 8055, Symonds St, Auckland, 1150.Alternatively send or fax this order form and payment can be deposited into bank account #06-0158-0010006-00 (Please use your name and ‘book order’ as reference).

Phone: 09 373 2879 Fax: 09 379 2668 email: [email protected]

Cool Schools resource order Form

Name: School:

Address:

email: Phone: Fax:

Order number: Cool Schools trainer:

Order Form also available on the Cool Schools section of The Peace Foundation website: www.peace.net.nz

resource items Price (Inc. GST) Quantity total $

Primary & intermediate

Cool Schools Primary Manual nEw $75.00

The Essential Peer Mediator Handbook nEw 1 copy $12.0010 copies $100.0020 copies $180.00

Coordinator’s Kit (USB stick) nEw $35.00

Poster: The Mediation Process nEw $6.00

Poster: The Problem Solving Owl nEw $6.00

Poster: A Good Listener nEw $6.00

Poster set (3 posters – one of each) Buy 5 SEtS and GEt 1 SEt FrEE $15.00

Training DVD $40.00

Badges: Presentation/Graduation Uniform Coordinator

$4.00$2.50$2.50

Vests: Small (93cm around chest) Lime green colour Medium (102cm) Large (113cm)

$30.00 Sm

Med

Lge

Sign (weatherproof 60x40cm) $40.00

Secondary

Cool Schools Secondary Manual $25.00

Training DVD Mt Roskill Grammar $30.00

Training DVD Takapuna Grammar $20.00

Badge: Presentation/Uniform $4.00

Sign (weatherproof 60x40cm) $40.00

SuB total

Postage & Packaging $8.00

total

Old stock of vests/sashes available at discounted prices – please phone for details.

The Peace Foundation, PO Box 8055, Symonds St, Grafton, Auckland 1150 Phone: 09 373 2879 Fax: 09 379 2668 email: [email protected]

www.peace.net.nz


“The mediation service helps the school to be a safe place from harassment and bullying so that students learn and feel a sense of belonging to the school.”

donna houriGan-JohnSon, GuidanCE CounSEllor, mt roSkill Grammar

“The training is fabulous: professional, youth relevant, and very effective in shifting young people’s paradigms about resolving conflict and teaching them how to mediate.”

triSh tutty, GuidanCE CounSEllor, BaradEnE CollEGE

“Mediation Camp (the training) has given me skills that i will use not just in peer mediation but in everyday life as well. The skills learnt are very effective and informative and help us relate and talk to people better.”

yEar 11 StudEnt, St CuthBErt’S CollEGE

“Being a Peer Mediator is empowering and incredibly rewarding… we are making a difference and this is something i really treasure.”

BaradEnE CollEGE hEad Girl

“The mediation programme is now a well ingrained part of our school programme. The staff have come to accept the children sorting out their own behavioural issues and has freed staff up to concentrate on “bigger behavioural issues” in the playground. Our next step is to get all teachers practicing the mediation skills and modelling them in their classes. When this happens automatically we know our school will have reached their goal. Thanks so much for all the support and encouragement and the awesome resources that we can access from The Peace foundation.”

dElwyn mC FarlanE-SCott, Cool SChoolS Co-ordinator, ranui Primary SChool

“The playground environment has changed dramatically, children now approach the mediators for support. The level of children solving their own disputes markedly increased. Mediation skills are being reinforced in the classrooms with class mediators beginning to resolve classroom conflicts… This programme provides a skill base for life. We would highly recommend other schools to up skill staff and students with The Peace foundation’s Cool Schools Peer Mediation Programme.”

traCEy Gill and dEBBiE Brown, Cool SChoolS Co-ordinatorS oratia diStriCt SChool

“Their (peer mediators) effect on the playground has been significant and other students regularly go to them to resolve conflicts and disagreements of a low level nature.”

BoB norriSh, PrinCiPal, oxFord arEa SChool

The Todd Foundation is a private family philanthropy based in Wellington. We provide funding to NZ organisations that contribute towards our vision of “Inclusive communities where all families, children and young people can thrive and contribute”. To work towards this vision, we focus on the following key goals:• Supporting families and communities

to provide safe and nurturing environ-ments for children

• Assisting children and families to partici-pate actively in learning, particularly in the early years

• Helping young people to develop their potential and to contribute fully in the community

The Todd Foundation has provided funding for the development of a variety of Cool Schools resources since 2002.

Quote from Kate Frykberg (Executive Director of The Todd Foundation):

“One of the things we particularly like about Cool Schools is that it is a ‘whole school’ initiative – something that has the potential to change the entire culture of the school (and potentially the community) for the better. Training young people as peer mediators fits really well with our goals. The mediators develop their own potential and contribute to their school community. In doing this, they also help make their schools safer for everyone, so that students can focus on learning in a supportive environment.”

2011 Feedback from Cool Schools…

in FoCuS:

the todd Foundation

PO Box 8055, Symonds Street, Grafton, Auckland 1150, Aotearoa/New ZealandPh (09) 373 2379 Fax (09) 379 2668Email [email protected] www.peace.net.nz

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MediationWorks Newsletter 2011

Documents

Transcript of MediationWorks Newsletter 2011