McGuffys News Brockville Vol 5 Issue 9
description
Transcript of McGuffys News Brockville Vol 5 Issue 9
Brockville and1000 Islands
Business and Career Opportunities Across Canada! Head Office: 306-446-2710 www.mcguffysnews.comVO
L. 5
Is
sue
09Free!Your Local WEEKLY McGuffy’s Edition
To Advertise Contact Your Advertising SpecialistJon: 613 342 0428
State Farm • Canadian Head Offices: Aurora, Ontario • statefarm.ca™P045003CN 12/04
WE SHARE THE SAME COMMITMENT.We share a commitment to serve our community. Thank you
newspaper readers for voting us #1 for all your insurance needs.Rick Beer, Agent
522 King Street WestBrockville, ON K6V 3T2
Bus: [email protected]
100 FREE 8½ x11 B ⁄W CopiesSome conditions apply. See store for details. Offer expires May 31, 2011.
We Copy & Print• Colour Digital Printing & Photocopying• Document Finishing• Business Cards & Stationery Items• Large Format Printing• Flyers & Brochures• And so much more!
79 –163 Ormond StBrockville, ON K6V 7E6
Some conditions apply. See store for details. O�er expires March 31, 2012.
ALL IN-STOCK Cabinets & VanitiesCASH
&
CARRY
ONLY
30%
OFF
Open: Tues to Fri 10 - 5, Sat 10 - 2www.DirectCabinets.ca
See Store for Details
For ALL your Cabinetry needs...613.865.7444
Visit our Showroom at4504 South Ave
(Hillcrest Plaza)Near Tincap
BerryFarm
Early Spring Sale
The Shake That Tastes Like A Cake!
613-341-7846 [email protected]
Start Your 90 Day Challenge!
www.overview.visalus.com
ViSalus Independent Distributor
LOSE WEIGHTSAVE MONEY
9 minute oil change!No appointments!
And Warranty approved!Rust Proo�ng $79.99!
Snow Tires From 59.99!
613.342.3000103 Broome Road , Brockville ON
www.prooilchange.com
Snow Tire Installations Available!
Get With The PRO`sOpen 7 Days A Week
PORTABLE RENTAL SIGNS· FLEET TRUCKS· PAINT PROTECTION· HEAVY EQUIPMENT· SOLVENT PRINTING· VEHICLE STRIPES· REAL ESTATE SIGNS· ILLUMINATED SIGNS
PROFESSIONAL [email protected] FAX: 613-925-1556
SPECIALIZING IN: VEHICLE WRAPS
Single vision eyewearlenses & frames $129.00
or1 year supply $199.00Acuve advance plus
(free trial fitting included)
Townsman Ltd., BrokerageIndependently owned & operated 116 King Street W., Brockville, On
330 Church St.in Brockville$156, 900!Well Maintained2 Bedroom West End! Helping You Make The Right Move!
Rick Burt C.E.T.Sales Representative
Direct: 613-498-7547O�ce:613-345-2121 ext 316
“Visit my listings!”www.c21burt.com
Call Jon (613) 342 0428
This double size adis available foryour business!
SEE OPPORTUNITY. SEE WHAT’S
HUMANLY POSSIBLEAT MANPOWER.COM
613-342-0250
C - Way Services
Airport ShuttleTel: 613-345-4915
www.cwaylimo.comBrockville • Ontario • Canada
5 ads you should check out in this issue!√ UPS 100 Free 8 ½ x 11 b/w Copies (see store for details)
√ Hwy 29 Auto Service 25% off Early Spring Special
√ Sam’s Brass Racks Entertainment Schedule
√ C-Way Services Airport Shuttle
√ Steve & Sons Plumbing/Heating & Water Repair
You Should Check This Out!
613-658-5779www.greenhorizonboilers.net
Bob Lunnie - President
Model 100 IndoorWood Boilers
ComfortEfficiencySecurityUp to 90% efficiencySimple operation & maintenance
Pro Series High Efficiency Wood Furnace
Up to 90% efficiencyCut Fuel Requirements in HelfIndoor / outdoor installationGasification TechnologySimple cleaning
Alternative Heating Products For A Cleaner Future!
Costly Fishing Trip
Dangerous Horns
Two avid fishermen go on a fishing trip. They rent all the equipment: the reels, the rods, the wading suits, the rowboat, the car, and even a cabin in the woods. They spend a fortune.
The first day they go fishing, but they don't catch anything. The same thing happens on the second day, and on the third day. It goes on like this until finally, on the last day of their vacation, one of the men catches a fish.
As they're driving home they're really depressed. One guy turns to the other and says, "Do you realize that this lousy fish cost us fifteen hundred dollars?"
The other guy says, "Wow! It's a good thing we only caught the one!"
The teacher spent the entire hour reading to her class about farm animals, and bulls in particular. When she had finished, she asked, "name some things that are very dangerous to get near to and have horns."
Little Johnny spoke up without hesitation, "Automobiles?"
Empowering Thoughts
Qui
ck
Funn
y
Statistics
Our school education ignores, in a thousand ways, the rules of healthy de-velopment. ~ Elizabeth Blackwell
Don’t find fault, find a remedy. ~ Henry Ford
Think like a man of action, and act like a man of thought. ~ Henri L. Bergson
I would feel more optimistic about a bright future for man if he spent less time proving that he can outwit Nature and more time tasting her sweetness and respecting her seniority. ~ E B White
• Worldwide, around 265 people are born every minute and 115 people die, for a net increase in population of 150 people every minute.
• The current population of Earth is over 7,039,090,367. Around 1900 there were only 1,600,000,000 people, meaning that Earth's population has more than quadru-pled in slightly over 100 years' time.
• The typical person breathes 370,000 cubic metres of air in their lifetime.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
Tongue TwisterTry saying this four times as fast as you can!
Sure the ship’s shipshape, sir.
Mobile VacuumSales & Service
Central’s - Canister’s - Upright’sNew & Used Vacuums
We Repair Most Makes & Models
FREE Delivery ~ FREE Pickup ~ FREE Estimates
613-802-4477
“In �e Of Brockville”
What Do You Want
To Re�ect?
Guys & Gals Full Service SalonSteph Saunders Owner
[email protected] 165 King St W Brockville613-498-9898
HENDERSON JOHNSTON FOURNIERLAWYERS
Service Integrity Efficiency
WILLS & ESTATESCORPORATE LAW
CIVIL LAWSUITSREAL ESTATE LAW
NEVILLE C. JOHNSTONPAUL J. FOURNIER
61 KING STREET EAST BROCKVILLE, ONTARIO
TEL: (613) 345-5613 FAX: (613) 345-6473 [email protected]
www.hendersonjohnstonfournier.com
613 - 498 - 23954014 Hwy 29, Brockville, ON
(Just north of Tincap’s only tra�c light)
Open: Mon - Fri 9am - 5pm Sat 9am - 1pm
Gift Certi�catesMake Great
Gifts!
(Red or White)$89.99*30 Bottles of House Wine
(see store for details)
Experience the joy of wine making! Wine created by you!
Stump Grinding Free EstimatesTree Removal Fully Insured
Maple Heights Tree ServiceServing the Seaway and Ottawa Valley Professional...Yet Affordable
1-877-MAPLE-10(1-877-627-5310)[email protected]
DOUG CHAPMAN – PRESIDENT
TUNINGS, Sales, Restorations & MovingBrockville, Prescott & Surrounding Areas
McGuffy’sDesigned Ads
Produce For You!
613-342-0428Call for details.
This double size adis available foryour business!
www.dkl�ooring.com
For All Your Hardwood NeedsSpecializing in re�nishing Old Wood Floors
“Restore Your Floor and More”
Chris Plume 613-349-4500chris@dkl�ooring.com
Floor Refinishing Fully Licensed & InsuredOver
15 Years
Experience
Loving atmosphereTrims Baths Nails
Paula FairfieldOwner/operatorBrockville, On.
613-345-6220By appointment only
www.mydoggroomerpawla.com
Word & Number Facts
10 Detoxifying Foods
1. A jiffy is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second. Thus the saying, I will be there in a jiffy.
2. In 1939 Erneset Vincent Wright published a novel called Gadsby, containing 50,110 words, none of which contained the letter 'e'.
3. The sentence "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" uses every letter of the alphabet.
4. The word "karate" means "empty hand."5. Eskimos have more than twenty words to de-
scribe snow.6. The word "queue" is the only word in the English
language that is still pronounced the same way when the last four letters are removed.
1. Beets2. Seaweed3. Dandelions4. Broccoli Sprouts5. Crushed Flaxseeds
6. Lemon water for a night7. Garlic8. Artichokes9. Curcumin (Turmeric)10. Apples
You Are Not What You Eat
But You Are What You Think..If you think you are beaten, you areIf you think you dare not, you don’tIf you like to win, but you think you can’tIt is almost certain you won’tIf you think you’ll lose, you’re lostFor out of the world we findSuccess begins with a fellow’s willIt’s all in the state of mindIf you think you are outclassed, you are,You’ve got to think high to rise,You’ve got to be sure of yourself beforeYou can ever win a prizeLife’s battles don’t always goTo the stronger or faster man,But sooner or later, the man who winsIs the man who thinks he can!
I CAN!
Qui
ckJo
ke
Two cows were standing in a field.One cow says to the other, “Moooooo.” The other says, “I was just gonna say that.”
Finish The Slogan
Answer:Does she … or doesn’t she?® Clairol hair color
Famous advertising slogans. See if you remember.
Silly
Q
uote
Lost Snack
Your True Colors
All art requires courage.
~ Anne Tucker
After a long, bumpy flight, the passengers were glad to finally land. They got off the airplane and the flight attendants checked for items
left behind.In a seat pocket, one attendant found a bag of home-made cookies with a
note saying, "Much love, Mom." Quickly, she gave the bag to the gate agent in hopes it would be reunited with its owner.
A few minutes later, an announcement came over the public-address sys-tem in the airport: "Would the passenger who lost his cookies on Flight 302, please return to the gate?"
The Great Unknown
The pale half-moon shaped area at the bottom of our finger nails is called the lunula, named for its likeness to the crescent moon.
Left behind by astronauts, the moon has mirrors on its surface. They were used to bounce laser beams off them to measure the distance to the moon.
It takes approximately 1.25 seconds for a moonbeam to reach the Earth.
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
~ Phyllis Diller
Mobile VacuumSales & Service
Central’s - Canister’s - Upright’sNew & Used Vacuums
We Repair Most Makes & Models
FREE Delivery ~ FREE Pickup ~ FREE Estimates
613-802-4477
“In �e Of Brockville”
What Do You Want
To Re�ect?
Guys & Gals Full Service SalonSteph Saunders Owner
[email protected] 165 King St W Brockville613-498-9898
HENDERSON JOHNSTON FOURNIERLAWYERS
Service Integrity Efficiency
WILLS & ESTATESCORPORATE LAW
CIVIL LAWSUITSREAL ESTATE LAW
NEVILLE C. JOHNSTONPAUL J. FOURNIER
61 KING STREET EAST BROCKVILLE, ONTARIO
TEL: (613) 345-5613 FAX: (613) 345-6473 [email protected]
www.hendersonjohnstonfournier.com
613 - 498 - 23954014 Hwy 29, Brockville, ON
(Just north of Tincap’s only tra�c light)
Open: Mon - Fri 9am - 5pm Sat 9am - 1pm
Gift Certi�catesMake Great
Gifts!
(Red or White)$89.99*30 Bottles of House Wine
(see store for details)
Experience the joy of wine making! Wine created by you!
Stump Grinding Free EstimatesTree Removal Fully Insured
Maple Heights Tree ServiceServing the Seaway and Ottawa Valley Professional...Yet Affordable
1-877-MAPLE-10(1-877-627-5310)[email protected]
DOUG CHAPMAN – PRESIDENT
TUNINGS, Sales, Restorations & MovingBrockville, Prescott & Surrounding Areas
McGuffy’sDesigned Ads
Produce For You!
613-342-0428Call for details.
This double size adis available foryour business!
www.dkl�ooring.com
For All Your Hardwood NeedsSpecializing in re�nishing Old Wood Floors
“Restore Your Floor and More”
Chris Plume 613-349-4500chris@dkl�ooring.com
Floor Refinishing Fully Licensed & InsuredOver
15 Years
Experience
Loving atmosphereTrims Baths Nails
Paula FairfieldOwner/operatorBrockville, On.
613-345-6220By appointment only
www.mydoggroomerpawla.com
Word & Number Facts
10 Detoxifying Foods
1. A jiffy is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second. Thus the saying, I will be there in a jiffy.
2. In 1939 Erneset Vincent Wright published a novel called Gadsby, containing 50,110 words, none of which contained the letter 'e'.
3. The sentence "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" uses every letter of the alphabet.
4. The word "karate" means "empty hand."5. Eskimos have more than twenty words to de-
scribe snow.6. The word "queue" is the only word in the English
language that is still pronounced the same way when the last four letters are removed.
1. Beets2. Seaweed3. Dandelions4. Broccoli Sprouts5. Crushed Flaxseeds
6. Lemon water for a night7. Garlic8. Artichokes9. Curcumin (Turmeric)10. Apples
You Are Not What You Eat
But You Are What You Think..If you think you are beaten, you areIf you think you dare not, you don’tIf you like to win, but you think you can’tIt is almost certain you won’tIf you think you’ll lose, you’re lostFor out of the world we findSuccess begins with a fellow’s willIt’s all in the state of mindIf you think you are outclassed, you are,You’ve got to think high to rise,You’ve got to be sure of yourself beforeYou can ever win a prizeLife’s battles don’t always goTo the stronger or faster man,But sooner or later, the man who winsIs the man who thinks he can!
I CAN!
Qui
ckJo
ke
Two cows were standing in a field.One cow says to the other, “Moooooo.” The other says, “I was just gonna say that.”
Finish The Slogan
Answer:Does she … or doesn’t she?® Clairol hair color
Famous advertising slogans. See if you remember.
Silly
Q
uote
Lost Snack
Your True Colors
All art requires courage.
~ Anne Tucker
After a long, bumpy flight, the passengers were glad to finally land. They got off the airplane and the flight attendants checked for items
left behind.In a seat pocket, one attendant found a bag of home-made cookies with a
note saying, "Much love, Mom." Quickly, she gave the bag to the gate agent in hopes it would be reunited with its owner.
A few minutes later, an announcement came over the public-address sys-tem in the airport: "Would the passenger who lost his cookies on Flight 302, please return to the gate?"
The Great Unknown
The pale half-moon shaped area at the bottom of our finger nails is called the lunula, named for its likeness to the crescent moon.
Left behind by astronauts, the moon has mirrors on its surface. They were used to bounce laser beams off them to measure the distance to the moon.
It takes approximately 1.25 seconds for a moonbeam to reach the Earth.
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
~ Phyllis Diller
Ph: 613-925-0000Fax: 613-925-0129
24/7 Service
Plumbing, Heating & Water Services Inc.
3526 County RD 26, Prescott, ONT.
Call the plumbing & water experts today!
Need a special Book?Give us a call613-342-5728
This areas #1 supplier of topographical maps and river charts. [email protected]
Courtney SadlerOwner
73 King St WBrockville, ON
Open 7 Days aWeek!
Check out our New Arrivals for 2012!
Tracy SeedOwner
87 King St WestBrockville, ON
613-345-7925 ext.101
Gift Certificates
make a greatt gift!We are your #1 Gift Store for your child’s educational
Toys/Puzzles/Puppets/Clothing/Accessories/Cards
Advertise your business here !
McGuffy’s ads work!Jon: (613) 342 0428
SAM’S BRASS RACKSSAM’S BRASS RACKSLive Entertainment ~ Billiards ~ Darts ~ Shu�eboard
Big Screen ~ NHL Package ~ NFL ~ Nascar Sundays
AGE
OF
MAJORITY
Monday’s - Pool League 7pmThurdays - Karaoke
Fridays - Live Entertainment 8pm - 12pm
24 Perth St, Brockville, ON (613)498 1919
March 2 - JourneyMenMarch 3 - Blues Daddy 3-7pm
March 9 - Little CaliforniaMarch 16 - Gypsy Moon
Sam’s March Line-Up:
March 17 - Celebrate St. Patrick’s Day 3-7pm
March 23 - City LimitsMarch 30 - Real DealMarch 31 - Gypsy Moon 3-7pm
Pick up McGuffy’s News every week!!
At over 140 Locations in Brockville/AthensNorth Augusta/LynMallorytown & Rockport
HWY 29 Auto Service#3012 Hwy 29, Brockville, On613-342-5299
Exhaust Brakes/BearingsStruts Transmission Service
Early Spring Special!Save 25% OFF
We Help Keep Car Repairs Affordable!
Very Punny
Ever Wonder?• How can military troops be deployed if they have
never been ployed to begin with?
• How can quicksand work slowly?
• How can someone 'draw a blank'?
• How can they tell that twin lobsters are really twins?
• How come we choose from just two people for Presi-
dent and fifty for Miss America?
~ Reading while sunbathing makes you well red.
~ When two egotists meet, it’s an I for an I.
~ Local Area Network in Australia : the LAN
down under.
Grandparent Quotes
Grandparents are similar to a piece of string - handy to have around and easily wrapped around the fingers of their grandchildren.
CRO
SS
WO
RD
Across1. Halloween5. ____ shortcake7. 16 ounces8. Necessary seasoning9. Bugs Bunny food11. Fudge
12. Fruits of hen14. Elves16. Fat ingredient17. Dried GrapeDown2. Topsy-turvey
3. Tart Citrus4. Icing6. Sun color10. Nut of the palm13. Lubricate pan15. Container
Cakes
Qui
ck
Rid
dle
Strange Laws
• You select your friends based on how well your cats like them.• You wait at the box with the scoop in your hand.• You think it’s cute when your cat swings on the drapes or licks the butter.• You sleep in the same position all night because it annoys your cats when
you move.• You feed your cat tidbits from the table with your spoon and they sit at
the table (or ON the table)• Your cat sleeps on your head and you don’t mind it.• You have more than four opened but rejected cans of cat food in the
refrigerator.• You buy a video tape of fish swimming in an aquarium to entertain your cat?• The Christmas cards you send out feature your cat sitting on Santa’s lap.• You microwave your cat’s food or prepare it from scratch.• You stand at the computer because the cat is sleeping on the chair?• You cook a special turkey for your cat on holidays?• When someone new comes to your house and you introduce your cat, by
name, to them.
You Know Your Cat Owns You When...
Why did King Kong climb the Empire State building? ~ Because he couldn’t fit in the elevator!
No Whistling Dixie! Strange as it may seem, organizers of the Scottish Traditional Boating
Festival ( June 20-22) have called for a ban on whistling!According to marine folklore, whistling at sea or near the seaside was
considered mocking the devil who could stir up a gale or two in retaliation. Taking precautions to ensure good weather for the festivities, the town has banned whistling…even for calling Fido.
But singing or humming is quite acceptable so you can still warble to your heart’s content in the shower.
Amazingly SoYou can not make the mmmm sound without pushing your lips together!
(You are trying it right now aren't you?)
Qui
ck
Quo
te
A man without a wife is like a vase without flowers.
FYIIn south Florida officials cut open the belly of
a 16-foot Burmese python they had captured and killed in the Everglades. Inside the reptile they found a 76-pound, fully intact deer.
The snake, which was a female, weighed 215.4 pounds with the deer, and 139.1 pounds without it. The girth of the snake's stomach, stretched to accommodate the carcass, measured a whopping 44.1-inch-es. From head to tail, the reptile measured 15.65 feet.
Sudoku Solution Crossword Solution
Good Question
1. Are there Seeing Eye humans for blind dogs? 2. Are zebras black with white stripes, or white with
black stripes?3. Aren't you tired of people asking you rhetorical
questions and you don't know if they are rhetori-cal questions or not?
Ph: 613-925-0000Fax: 613-925-0129
24/7 Service
Plumbing, Heating & Water Services Inc.
3526 County RD 26, Prescott, ONT.
Call the plumbing & water experts today!
Need a special Book?Give us a call613-342-5728
This areas #1 supplier of topographical maps and river charts. [email protected]
Courtney SadlerOwner
73 King St WBrockville, ON
Open 7 Days aWeek!
Check out our New Arrivals for 2012!
Tracy SeedOwner
87 King St WestBrockville, ON
613-345-7925 ext.101
Gift Certificates
make a greatt gift!We are your #1 Gift Store for your child’s educational
Toys/Puzzles/Puppets/Clothing/Accessories/Cards
Advertise your business here !
McGuffy’s ads work!Jon: (613) 342 0428
SAM’S BRASS RACKSSAM’S BRASS RACKSLive Entertainment ~ Billiards ~ Darts ~ Shu�eboard
Big Screen ~ NHL Package ~ NFL ~ Nascar Sundays
AGE
OF
MAJORITY
Monday’s - Pool League 7pmThurdays - Karaoke
Fridays - Live Entertainment 8pm - 12pm
24 Perth St, Brockville, ON (613)498 1919
March 2 - JourneyMenMarch 3 - Blues Daddy 3-7pm
March 9 - Little CaliforniaMarch 16 - Gypsy Moon
Sam’s March Line-Up:
March 17 - Celebrate St. Patrick’s Day 3-7pm
March 23 - City LimitsMarch 30 - Real DealMarch 31 - Gypsy Moon 3-7pm
Pick up McGuffy’s News every week!!
At over 140 Locations in Brockville/AthensNorth Augusta/LynMallorytown & Rockport
HWY 29 Auto Service#3012 Hwy 29, Brockville, On613-342-5299
Exhaust Brakes/BearingsStruts Transmission Service
Early Spring Special!Save 25% OFF
We Help Keep Car Repairs Affordable!
Very Punny
Ever Wonder?• How can military troops be deployed if they have
never been ployed to begin with?
• How can quicksand work slowly?
• How can someone 'draw a blank'?
• How can they tell that twin lobsters are really twins?
• How come we choose from just two people for Presi-
dent and fifty for Miss America?
~ Reading while sunbathing makes you well red.
~ When two egotists meet, it’s an I for an I.
~ Local Area Network in Australia : the LAN
down under.
Grandparent Quotes
Grandparents are similar to a piece of string - handy to have around and easily wrapped around the fingers of their grandchildren.
CRO
SS
WO
RD
Across1. Halloween5. ____ shortcake7. 16 ounces8. Necessary seasoning9. Bugs Bunny food11. Fudge
12. Fruits of hen14. Elves16. Fat ingredient17. Dried GrapeDown2. Topsy-turvey
3. Tart Citrus4. Icing6. Sun color10. Nut of the palm13. Lubricate pan15. Container
Cakes
Qui
ck
Rid
dle
Strange Laws
• You select your friends based on how well your cats like them.• You wait at the box with the scoop in your hand.• You think it’s cute when your cat swings on the drapes or licks the butter.• You sleep in the same position all night because it annoys your cats when
you move.• You feed your cat tidbits from the table with your spoon and they sit at
the table (or ON the table)• Your cat sleeps on your head and you don’t mind it.• You have more than four opened but rejected cans of cat food in the
refrigerator.• You buy a video tape of fish swimming in an aquarium to entertain your cat?• The Christmas cards you send out feature your cat sitting on Santa’s lap.• You microwave your cat’s food or prepare it from scratch.• You stand at the computer because the cat is sleeping on the chair?• You cook a special turkey for your cat on holidays?• When someone new comes to your house and you introduce your cat, by
name, to them.
You Know Your Cat Owns You When...
Why did King Kong climb the Empire State building? ~ Because he couldn’t fit in the elevator!
No Whistling Dixie! Strange as it may seem, organizers of the Scottish Traditional Boating
Festival ( June 20-22) have called for a ban on whistling!According to marine folklore, whistling at sea or near the seaside was
considered mocking the devil who could stir up a gale or two in retaliation. Taking precautions to ensure good weather for the festivities, the town has banned whistling…even for calling Fido.
But singing or humming is quite acceptable so you can still warble to your heart’s content in the shower.
Amazingly SoYou can not make the mmmm sound without pushing your lips together!
(You are trying it right now aren't you?)
Qui
ck
Quo
te
A man without a wife is like a vase without flowers.
FYIIn south Florida officials cut open the belly of
a 16-foot Burmese python they had captured and killed in the Everglades. Inside the reptile they found a 76-pound, fully intact deer.
The snake, which was a female, weighed 215.4 pounds with the deer, and 139.1 pounds without it. The girth of the snake's stomach, stretched to accommodate the carcass, measured a whopping 44.1-inch-es. From head to tail, the reptile measured 15.65 feet.
Sudoku Solution Crossword Solution
Good Question
1. Are there Seeing Eye humans for blind dogs? 2. Are zebras black with white stripes, or white with
black stripes?3. Aren't you tired of people asking you rhetorical
questions and you don't know if they are rhetori-cal questions or not?
Christie Aluminum Products
Custom windows that are a perfect �t!An air tight investment!High quality, energy e�cient vinyl windows and doors!
900 Industrial Rd, Prescott Ontario613-925-5374 (cell) 613-802-2874
613-345-2110Brad Sharron, DD65 George St.Brockville, ON
Loose?Cracked & Worn?Over 5yrs old?In Your Pocket?Missing Teeth?Causing Gum Pain?
Take The TestAre Your Dentures?
• Complete - partial dentures• Relines • Repairs • Soft Liners• Implant denturesNo Referrals Necessary!
“Let Us Restore Your
Natural Smile!”
TODAY IS A GOOD DAYTO mAke ThInGS SImplerInsurance and investment solutions that fit your life. I can help.
© Sun Life Assurance Company of Canada, 2012.
Anna Trakas613-545-9660 ext [email protected]/anna.trakas
Thousand Islanders Women’s A Cappella Chorus
Wednesdays 7-10pm First Baptist Church, 9 Pine St. Brockville
Membership: Gidget 345-0628 Performances: Barbara 345-6649
and let your spirit soar!
We’ll help you
Bustiers
Pauline’s has everything you needfor your wedding day & night!
Perfect fitting lingerie is key to a stunning wedding dress!
Receive a free
garter or stockings with your purchase!
Before you dress - Be fitted for the gorgeous piecesthat will make you look your best!
Tummy TamersSexy Panties
Stockings & SleepwearStrapless Bras
Call Jonfor details.
(613) 342-0428
Advertise Your Spa Specialties.
Canadian Hearing SocietyFree home or o�ce visits• improve communication
• improve safety in your home• assistive listening devices • hearing aid batteries
Please call us to �nd out more about our programs and servicesPhone 613-498-3933 TTY 1-877-817-8209
Or visit us at 68 William Street, Suite 205 Brockville, Ontario K6V 0A7
Itrix
51 King St. West, Brockville, ON613 - 498 - 2200
Fax 613 - 498 - 2205
• Quality Eyewear• Contact Lenses• Eye Exams Arranged• 24 Years of ExperienceRosemary
ColemanOwner
ROSEMARY’S OPTICAL SHOP
Golden Soles
Gift CertificatesAvailable 46 King Street East Brockville, ON
613-342-7111 Cell: 613-340-6330
Comfort Diabetic Socks
All In Stock Winter Footwear35% - 50% O�
Your Business Should STAND OUT!and it will in your LOCAL McGu�y`s!
Call to place YOUR ad TODAY! 613.342.0428
Residential & Commercial
Gas ~ Oil ~ Propane FurnacesHeat Pumps ~ Boiler Service ~ Ventilation
Repairs & Service to Farm EquipmentJoe Cooke
Owner24 Hour Emergency Service
613-802-0384
100 Stewart Blvd. Brockville(Inside Quality Hotel) 613-345-1400 (ext 163)
A true health & wellness center focused on your success!Physical fitness & nutritional programs tailored to meet your needs.
We offer:Pool/Squash
Sauna/Steam RoomHot Tub
Private Fitness GymPersonal Training
“A Total Approach to Health & Fitness”
A Fresh Perspective The Price of Raising Kids
The government recently calculated the cost of raising a child from birth to 18 and came up with $160,140.00 for a middle income family. Talk about price shock! That doesn’t even touch college tuition.
But $160,140.00 isn’t so bad if you break it down. It translates into: * $8,896.66 a year, * $741.38 a month, * $171.08 a week. * A mere $24.24 a day! * Just over a dollar an hour. Still, you might think the best financial advice is; don’t have children
if you want to be ‘rich.’ Actually, it is just the opposite. What do you get for your $160,140.00? * Naming rights . First, middle, and last! * Glimpses of God every day. * Giggles under the covers every night. * More love than your heart can hold. * Butterfly kisses and Velcro hugs.. * Endless wonder over rocks, ants, clouds, and warm cookies. * A hand to hold usually covered with jelly or chocolate. * A partner for blowing bubbles and flying kites. * Someone to laugh yourself silly with, no matter what the boss said
or how your stocks performed that day. For $160,140.00, you never have to grow up. You get to: * finger-paint, * carve pumpkins, * play hide-and-seek, * catch lightning bugs, * never stop believing in Santa Claus. You have an excuse to: * keep reading the Adventures of Piglet and Pooh, * watch Saturday morning cartoons, * go to Disney movies, and
* wish on stars. You get to frame rainbows, hearts, and flowers under refrigerator
magnets and collect spray painted noodle wreaths for Christmas, hand prints set in clay for Mother’s Day, and cards with backward letters for Father’s Day .
For a mere $24.24 a day, there is no greater bang for your buck. You get to be a hero just for:
* retrieving a Frisbee off the garage roof, * taking the training wheels off a bike, * removing a splinter, * filling a wading pool , * coaxing a wad of gum out of bangs, and * coaching a baseball team that never wins but always gets treated to
ice cream regardless. You get a front row seat in history to witness the: * First step, * First word, * First bra, * First date, * First time behind the wheel. You get to be immortal. You get another branch added to your fam-
ily tree, and if you’re lucky, a long list of limbs in your obituary called grandchildren and great grandchildren. You get an education in psy-chology, nursing, criminal justice, communications, and human sexual-ity that no college can match..
In the eyes of a child, you rank right up there under God. You have all the power to heal a boo-boo, scare away the monsters under the bed, patch a broken heart, police a slumber party, ground them forever, and love them without limits, so one day they will, like you, love without counting the cost. That is quite a deal for the price!
Love & enjoy your children & grandchildren & great-grandchildren! It’s the best investment you’ll ever make!
Mayor Quotes
"The streets are safe in Philadelphia. It's only the people who make them unsafe." ~ Frank Rizzo, ex-police chief and Mayor of Philadelphia.
"There is no housing shortage in Lincoln today - just a rumour that is put about by people who have nowhere to live." ~ G.L. Murfin, Mayor of Lincoln
RebusA Rebus is a picture or word representation
of a name, work or phrase. How fast can you guess this one?
Answer:
HEADHEALS TEMPORARY
(Temporary setback)
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and let your spirit soar!
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A Fresh Perspective The Price of Raising Kids
The government recently calculated the cost of raising a child from birth to 18 and came up with $160,140.00 for a middle income family. Talk about price shock! That doesn’t even touch college tuition.
But $160,140.00 isn’t so bad if you break it down. It translates into: * $8,896.66 a year, * $741.38 a month, * $171.08 a week. * A mere $24.24 a day! * Just over a dollar an hour. Still, you might think the best financial advice is; don’t have children
if you want to be ‘rich.’ Actually, it is just the opposite. What do you get for your $160,140.00? * Naming rights . First, middle, and last! * Glimpses of God every day. * Giggles under the covers every night. * More love than your heart can hold. * Butterfly kisses and Velcro hugs.. * Endless wonder over rocks, ants, clouds, and warm cookies. * A hand to hold usually covered with jelly or chocolate. * A partner for blowing bubbles and flying kites. * Someone to laugh yourself silly with, no matter what the boss said
or how your stocks performed that day. For $160,140.00, you never have to grow up. You get to: * finger-paint, * carve pumpkins, * play hide-and-seek, * catch lightning bugs, * never stop believing in Santa Claus. You have an excuse to: * keep reading the Adventures of Piglet and Pooh, * watch Saturday morning cartoons, * go to Disney movies, and
* wish on stars. You get to frame rainbows, hearts, and flowers under refrigerator
magnets and collect spray painted noodle wreaths for Christmas, hand prints set in clay for Mother’s Day, and cards with backward letters for Father’s Day .
For a mere $24.24 a day, there is no greater bang for your buck. You get to be a hero just for:
* retrieving a Frisbee off the garage roof, * taking the training wheels off a bike, * removing a splinter, * filling a wading pool , * coaxing a wad of gum out of bangs, and * coaching a baseball team that never wins but always gets treated to
ice cream regardless. You get a front row seat in history to witness the: * First step, * First word, * First bra, * First date, * First time behind the wheel. You get to be immortal. You get another branch added to your fam-
ily tree, and if you’re lucky, a long list of limbs in your obituary called grandchildren and great grandchildren. You get an education in psy-chology, nursing, criminal justice, communications, and human sexual-ity that no college can match..
In the eyes of a child, you rank right up there under God. You have all the power to heal a boo-boo, scare away the monsters under the bed, patch a broken heart, police a slumber party, ground them forever, and love them without limits, so one day they will, like you, love without counting the cost. That is quite a deal for the price!
Love & enjoy your children & grandchildren & great-grandchildren! It’s the best investment you’ll ever make!
Mayor Quotes
"The streets are safe in Philadelphia. It's only the people who make them unsafe." ~ Frank Rizzo, ex-police chief and Mayor of Philadelphia.
"There is no housing shortage in Lincoln today - just a rumour that is put about by people who have nowhere to live." ~ G.L. Murfin, Mayor of Lincoln
RebusA Rebus is a picture or word representation
of a name, work or phrase. How fast can you guess this one?
Answer:
HEADHEALS TEMPORARY
(Temporary setback)
Brockville and1000 Islands
Business and Career Opportunities Across Canada! Head Office: 306-446-2710 www.mcguffysnews.comVO
L. 5
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09
Free!Your Local WEEKLY McGuffy’s EditionTo Advertise Contact Your Advertising Specialist
Jon: 613 342 [email protected]
State Farm • Canadian Head Offices: Aurora, Ontario • statefarm.ca™P045003CN 12/04
WE SHARE THE SAME COMMITMENT.We share a commitment to serve our community. Thank you
newspaper readers for voting us #1 for all your insurance needs.Rick Beer, Agent
522 King Street WestBrockville, ON K6V 3T2
Bus: [email protected]
100 FREE 8½ x11 B ⁄W CopiesSome conditions apply. See store for details. Offer expires May 31, 2011.
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Some conditions apply. See store for details. O�er expires March 31, 2012.
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330 Church St.in Brockville$156, 900!Well Maintained2 Bedroom West End! Helping You Make The Right Move!
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5 ads you should check out in this issue!√ UPS 100 Free 8 ½ x 11 b/w Copies (see store for details)
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Costly Fishing Trip
Dangerous Horns
Two avid fishermen go on a fishing trip. They rent all the equipment: the reels, the rods, the wading suits, the rowboat, the car, and even a cabin in the woods. They spend a fortune.
The first day they go fishing, but they don't catch anything. The same thing happens on the second day, and on the third day. It goes on like this until finally, on the last day of their vacation, one of the men catches a fish.
As they're driving home they're really depressed. One guy turns to the other and says, "Do you realize that this lousy fish cost us fifteen hundred dollars?"
The other guy says, "Wow! It's a good thing we only caught the one!"
The teacher spent the entire hour reading to her class about farm animals, and bulls in particular. When she had finished, she asked, "name some things that are very dangerous to get near to and have horns."
Little Johnny spoke up without hesitation, "Automobiles?"
Empowering Thoughts
Qui
ck
Funn
y
Statistics
Our school education ignores, in a thousand ways, the rules of healthy de-velopment. ~ Elizabeth Blackwell
Don’t find fault, find a remedy. ~ Henry Ford
Think like a man of action, and act like a man of thought. ~ Henri L. Bergson
I would feel more optimistic about a bright future for man if he spent less time proving that he can outwit Nature and more time tasting her sweetness and respecting her seniority. ~ E B White
• Worldwide, around 265 people are born every minute and 115 people die, for a net increase in population of 150 people every minute.
• The current population of Earth is over 7,039,090,367. Around 1900 there were only 1,600,000,000 people, meaning that Earth's population has more than quadru-pled in slightly over 100 years' time.
• The typical person breathes 370,000 cubic metres of air in their lifetime.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
Tongue TwisterTry saying this four times as fast as you can!
Sure the ship’s shipshape, sir.