How Material Possessions

Chain You Down

Today I was doing some final checks on what I will take to the UK. I will be there for a bit, then go to Italy, come back, stay in the UK for a month or more and then go to Italy again and then I may come back to Lithuania. I’m still thinking if I should come back to my home country or stay in UK because I’ve missed London very much.

While I was packing and planning my trips, I started to think about a good friend of mine. She absolutely loves travelling and discovering new cultures and traditions. However in the four years that I’ve spend visiting many countries in Western Europe, she hasn’t been to any. During those four years she got married, got a mortgage and got stuck in an accountancy firm which drains her every single day.

I met her a week or so after I came back to Lithuania. I haven’t seen her for four years, so I couldn’t wait to meet her. When we met, I was surprised to discover how different we became. We used to be best friends at school, we used to be inseparable and we shared the same likes and dislikes about everything. Yet the person I met that day was entirely different to the person I knew some time ago.

She looked pale, she didn’t have any sparkle in her eyes. The joyous smile which used to never leave her face was gone. She talked about the struggle that she was in, the difficulties with her mortgage payments, disagreements with her family and frustration at work. Yes, it was a usual tale of a voluntary struggler.

Her situation made me think about how people get so stuck that they can’t even allow themselves to do what they enjoy most. As I was thinking about that I’ve identified some factors that cause such situation. By far the most important factor (and probably the least addressed one) I’ve identified is the burden of material possessions. Not much thought is given to this aspect of our lives which enslave us instead of making us happy.

How people get chained down by material possessions

Without even becoming conscious of that, most people get stuck in life because they buy houses, pets, cars and get plenty of useless things that make it almost impossible for them to move or radically change their lifestyles should they wish to do so. They cannot afford to do what they like because all their money goes into the recurring payments of their material possessions or they compulsively buy more stuff that create misery instead of happiness.

People don’t give enough thought about buying things that will take up their time or require some form of commitment. People buy pets without realizing how much care they need and how many arrangements they will need to make when it comes to holidays or anything to do with leaving their home for more than a day. People get mortgages without understanding how many holidays they will have to miss to make timely mortgage payments and how long they will have to slave for the debt

to be repaid. People have children without understanding if they are really ready to be parents and whether their children will have the best conditions to grow up in.

This lack of thinking about long term consequences creates misery and regret. Furthermore, it chains you down because you create responsibilities you are not ready for or don’t want. Social pressure also forces people to make decisions without thinking them through.

How material possessions control you

Material possessions have the tendency to create responsibilities that chain people down. If you buy home on finances you have the responsibility to pay your mortgage; If you buy a plant you have to water it; If you buy something expensive you tend to keep it safe and worry about it.

Material possessions create fear, worry, insecurity, competition, guilt, jealousy and all other kinds of negativity you should avoid at all costs. The less possessions you have, therefore, the more happy you become. That’s why people who are not locked down by mortgages and other costly payments are the happiest people in the world. They are called “free souls” and voluntary strugglers look at them with wonder and disbelief.

Some people even think that the amount of material possessions you gather shows how successful you are in life. Such thinking creates competition and misery instead of happiness that should be the result of success. People who make the gathering of material possessions their sole goal are always disappointed once their goal is achieved. This is because material possessions are the byproducts of our creativity, so they should never be the final goal.

Most people get into the material possessions’ trap because they follow the heard and ignore their own voice of sanity. They think that what the masses do is what’s good and therefore they thoughtlessly enslave themselves.

Most people, if asked what they work for, would find it difficult to answer this question simply because they do what they see others doing instead of thinking with their own heads. Some of them would answer that the reason they work so hard is to keep up with the payments for the stuff they own. It’s sad when this is the purpose of people’s lives because such goal will never make anyone happy.

Only when the responsibilities for material possessions start strangling people do some of them realize that such struggle is pointless. But then they think that it’s too late to change anything so they stay in their unfulfilling situation. But it’s never too late to end this insanity. You don’t have to own the stuff that others think you should. You don’t have to have kids and you don’t have to get married. You don’t have to work 9-5 and you don’t have to have a controlling boss. You can make a better choice and end this loop of struggle at any time.

How to undo the chains you put upon yourself

I’m not saying however than owning anything is bad for you. The stuff is here for you to enjoy it, but when people take material possessions too seriously, the unhappiness begins. So if you find yourself unhappy although you own many things, there are certain steps you can take to free yourself from this misery.

To set yourself free you should sell the things that drain you and make you miserable. Also try to change your opinion about the purpose of the material possessions. Try to understand that stuff is here for you to experience and enjoy. Stuff you own helps to decide who you are. If you like some stuff, it as though defines some aspect of you. If you don’t like something, you know what you would like instead and that also defines who you are. So stuff is like a medium that helps to identify your personality.

Although material possessions help you identify your own likes and dislikes, you should not identify with the stuff. It’s a tool you can use but not the thing that should control you. If you get really upset when you lose something, this is the indication that you let material possessions control you. If this is the case, get rid most of your stuff because that will allow you to feel the freedom that you’ve been denying yourself.

Cancel monthly subscriptions that don’t give you the peace of mind. Do away with things such as memberships if they mean to you less than the freedom. The more stuff (and thus responsibilities attached to them) you will get rid of, the more free you will feel.

When you free yourself from material possessions, the whole world of new opportunities will open to you. You may suddenly realize that you can indeed create your own business and live off the income it produces because you are not chained by huge monthly payments. You may even realize that you can travel more often and longer than before. You will also likely to come to an understanding that life is not about owning stuff and that material possessions create more misery than happiness. Happiness comes from the experience of something, from higher awareness levels and from realizing the power that you have within you and not from the material possessions that you own.

The more you unchain yourself, the more you will feel like a free bird (that’s the best way I can describe this feeling). You can lift off whenever you want, you are not responsible for anything and you don’t need to depend on anyone. Some people might consider such life irresponsible and childish and yet those who speak this way are people who are chained down most and feel that they can’t do anything about their situation.

Don’t get caught up in the life drama

Many people get caught up in the struggle game. They work to survive and their whole focus is on survival or gathering more stuff rather than happiness. They look how to make the ends meet instead of looking for ways to enhance life, make themselves happier. They are so caught up in this game that they think it’s real. They buy new stuff and if they can’t afford it they buy stuff on finances. They think that they make wise decisions. In truth, they are largely influenced by companies, governments and other people. Most people don’t think, they just react to what’s happening around them.

This game looks very real to those who are still in it. They fear that they will lose their possessions, they are scared because they are in debt and they worry about insignificant things. They force themselves to go to work and be nice to people they dislike. And this all seems to them inevitable.

If you find yourself in such situation, I encourage you to step away from this insanity and take a good look at your life and the lives of all those who are in the same struggle (most people). Try to view it objectively as though you are an observer. The more you look at your life and the lives of other people from such angle, the more patterns you will notice. Then you will start seeing the illusion of struggle for stuff that most people are caught up in. You will see the insanity of it all.

Once you clearly see this illusion, here’s what will happen to you. You will start doing the opposite of what the masses do. And this will lead you to freedom.

You will no longer spend money on useless things as other people do. You no longer buy stuff because other people do. You will start thinking with your own head and so your decisions will lead you to a different destination than where the masses are headed. You will no longer thoughtlessly accept the ideas of the masses and therefore will appear unconventional to some. That’s completely okay and you should actually be happy about it.

Final advice

If you are starting to wake up from this struggle game, congratulations! I’m always happy to hear from my readers who understood the illusion that masses buy into. It’s freeing to know that you don’t have to do what other people do. You are a free soul so don’t let anyone chain you down – not people, not possessions.

Don’t be afraid to unchain yourself from all those responsibilities that cause unhappiness. Free yourself and open yourself to the real life that is waiting for you to wake up. It’s the whole world out there, don’t bury yourself whilst you’re alive. Travel, pursue your hobbies, have meaningful relationships, have new experiences – that’s what the life is all about!

This article was written by a success coach Simona Rich.

Visit her website for many more transformational self improvement articles at personal-development-coach.net.

Follow Simona Rich on twitter at twitter.com/simonarich.