MASTODON
description
Transcript of MASTODON
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MASTODON
MAMMOTH
VS.DEUCE(Part 2)
DamnRight!
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After battling weeks of bad weather and 20,000 years worth of permafrost, scientists in Siberia have done the unthinkable—
excavated a 20,380 year-old woolly mammoth in hopes of cloning these Ice Age giants.
There it is!Yes! Victory! NowUse your laser beameyes to excavate theBeast!!
Shit! I forgotto get the laser beam upgrade!
HELL YES! Let’s Laser beam this mother fucker OUT!
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What the sack? Are those laser beams I feel
on these old bones? Who the fuck is
disturbing me on the shabbos?
Laser beams
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Laz0red!
Hell yes! I cannot wait until i have myown army of mammothclones to work in my factory making fuglygray baseball caps!
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Sweet lamb of glory! The beast
has risen from the
belly of the earth!
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Yes, I have risen from theearth! Those damn laserbeams made me all scorchinghot. Could you please direct me to a Mammoth SwimmingPool?
The only swimmingYou’ll be doing is in the
gene pool! PREPRE TO BE CLONED!
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Mwah ha ha ha! The rising of my old enemy, The Mammoth, has
also resurrected me, The Mastodon! Now it is time for me to seek my revenge! I am SO ready
to tear The Mammoth’s ass up!
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Are you ready to fight me, you smelly
Mammoth? Prepare yourself for a severe
ass wailing!
Oh shits! It’s that crazy mother fucker
The Mastodon! I need to summon my bad ass super powers!
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That’s right! Fear this sweet-ass cape and the
sweet-ass beating that’s coming your way,
Mastodon!
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HA! Your cape and mask are inferior to my swanky-
ass bow tie and BOWLER! Come here so I can kick
your ass with this cane that makes me look suaver than
a mother fucker!
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DAMN! He’s not fuckingaround with that bad ass
MONOCLE!
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BRING ITBITCH!
POW!ZAP!
BANG!
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Wait, Mastodon! Don’t you think that in this day and age - after millions of
years have passed - that we can bury the poorly underdeveloped hatchet of
our time and make amends? Why are we fighting over things that don’t matter anymore? We should unite
and kick some cloning mother fuckers’ asses!
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You know, you may be a smelly ol’ mammoth, but you do have a point. We need to protect ourselves against
the evil scientists. These trying times have really brought us
together, it seems. If my heart hadn’t decomposed 10,000 years ago, I bet it would be swelling with
joy right now.
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AUGGGGGGGGH!NOT MY LASER
EYES!
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You think you are so smart by killing my assistants and stealing their laser eyes! Well, who will have the last laugh when Iam able to clone mammoths and mast-odons with laser eyes!?! Mwah ha ha!FOOLS! Your prehistoric minds can’t Fathom what you’ve just done!
Laz0red!
ARRRG!I have been
Laz0red!Defeated.By. The.
Enemy. *dies*
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Well, friend, we defeated the evil scientists! How about a high five up in this mother fuckin’ house?!
FRIEND!? Mwah ha ha ha ha!You foolish old Mastodon!
FOR THE LOVE OF
MONOCLES…NOOOOOOOO
OO! *dies*
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Mastodon
For the love of monocles….HELL
YES, MOTHER FUCKER! Face it Mastodon, you’ve
just been SASSED!
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WELCOMETo
THE MAMMOTHSWIMMING POOL!
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Diving board
I am readyTo cannon ball the fuck out of this MammothSwimming Pool!
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THE END!