Love: Positivity resonance as a fresh, evidence-based ......broader love system grows stronger as...

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Love: Positivity resonance as a fresh, evidence-based perspective on an age-old topic Barbara L. Fredrickson University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill RUNNING HEAD: Love Chapter to appear in L. F. Barrett, M. Lewis, and J. M. Haviland-Jones (Eds.) Handbook of Emotions, 4 th Ed. New York: Guilford Press.

Transcript of Love: Positivity resonance as a fresh, evidence-based ......broader love system grows stronger as...

  • Love:

    Positivityresonanceasafresh,evidence-basedperspectiveonanage-oldtopic

    BarbaraL.Fredrickson

    UniversityofNorthCarolinaatChapelHill

    RUNNINGHEAD:Love

    ChaptertoappearinL.F.Barrett,M.Lewis,andJ.M.Haviland-Jones(Eds.)

    HandbookofEmotions,4thEd.NewYork:GuilfordPress.

  • Love:

    Positivityresonanceasafresh,evidence-basedperspectiveonanage-oldtopic

    Whatislove?Humanshaveponderedthemeaningofthissplendored

    phenomenonformillennia.Anythingthatsoreliablystirsthehumanheart,

    preoccupiesthemind,andignitespassionateactioncertainlymeritsthislong-

    standingandcontinuedinquiry.Artisticexpressionsofwhatloveisandhowit

    worksabound–inpoetry,books,songs,andmovies.Scientificperspectivesareless

    prevalent.Althoughscientificpsychologybeganinthelate1800s,morethansix

    decadesintothiscollectiveendeavor,HarryHarlow,thenpresidentoftheAmerican

    PsychologicalAssociation,decriedthatpsychologistshad“failed”toadvancebeyond

    poetsandnovelistsinunderstandingthe“wondrousstate”oflove,“deep,tender,

    andrewarding”(Harlow,1958,p.673).Inthenearlysixdecadessincereceiving

    thisfailinggrade,twostrandsofpsychologicalsciencehavetakenthelovequestion

    seriously:Developmentalsciencehasinvestigatedhowloveemergesbetween

    infantsandtheircaregivers(e.g.Ainsworth,1985;Stern,2008),andrelationship

    sciencehasexploredromanticlove,includinghowearlychildhoodattachment

    shapesadulthoodloverelationships(Hazan&Shaver,1987;Bartholomew&

    Horowitz,1991;Mikulincer,Shaver,Sapir-Lavid,&Avihou-Kanza,2009).1

    Neighboringemotionsciencelagsbehind.Althoughafewemotionscientists

    havedevotedattentiontothelovequestionovertheyears(e.g.,Fehr&Russell,

    1991;Gonzaga,Keltner,Londahl,&Smith,2001;Shaver,Morgan,&Wu,1996),

    theseeffortshavenotgerminatedathrivingstudyoflovewithinaffectivescience.

    Aslong-timelovescholar,ElaineBersheidrecentlynoted,“emotiontheoristshave

  • theirownproblems[indefiningemotions]andarenotyetinapositiontohelplove

    scholars”(2010,p.8).Foremotionscientists,whobydefinitionfavorthestudyof

    momentaryphenomena,lovemaywellseemtoolarge,tooall-encompassing,ifnot

    toopop-culture.

    Thelargenessofloveisevidentbythediversesetofpsychological

    phenomenathatfitundertheumbrellatermlove:thepreoccupyingandstrong

    desireforfurtherconnection,thepowerfulbondspeopleholdwithaselectfewand

    theintimacythatgrowsbetweenthem,thecommitmentstoloyaltyandfaithfulness.

    Indeed,whenonepersonsays,“Iloveyou”toanother,itcanpointtoanyorallofthe

    above.Thatis,thisubiquitousutterancemayreflectastrongcravingforphysical

    contactorproximity,orserveasameanstoinviteorsecuretheotherpersoninto

    one’sinnermostcircleofsocialties,oritmaysignaladeepandabidingtrust,ora

    commitmenttobeloyal.Yet,inadditiontodesire,bonds,intimacy,and

    commitment,loveisanemotion–aphenomenonthatarisestoinfusebothmindand

    bodyforamoment,andthendissipates.

    Thischapterputsforthanewperspectiveonlove,onethatemanatesfrom

    emotionscience.Thegoalistoprovideaconceptualframeworktosupportafresh

    waveofempiricalresearchonthisreveredemotionalstate.Thisnewperspective

    holdsthat,atitscore,loveisapleasantandmomentaryexperienceofconnection

    withanotherperson(orpersons).Inthisframework,otherconstructsthatare

    commonlytakenassynonymsof“love”–suchasdesire,bonds,intimacy,and

    commitments–arecastasproductsoftheaccumulationoffleetingemotionalstates

    oflove.Assuch,therangeofotherphenomenathatgobythename“love”–inboth

  • scientificandcommonlanguage–maybestbeseenaspartofalargeranddynamic

    “lovesystem.”

    Thehubconceptthatdrivesthisdynamicsystemisapotentandpleasant

    emotionalstate.Likeallpositiveemotions,theemotionalstateofloveobeysthe

    ancestrallogicofthebroaden-and-buildtheory(cf.Fredrickson,1998,2013a).

    Love-the-emotionbroadensmindsetsbyexpandingpeople’sawareness,particularly

    ofself-otheroverlap(Aron,Aron,&Smollen,1992;Waugh&Fredrickson,2006),

    creatingperceptionsoftogetherness,connection,unity,oroneness.Love-the-

    emotionbuildsresourcesforsurvivalbyforgingandstrengtheningpeople’ssocial

    desire,bonds,intimacy,andcommitments.Eachoftheseotherconceptswithinthe

    broaderlovesystemgrowsstrongerasmomentsoflove-the-emotionaccumulate.

    Yetthecausalarrowsalsorunintheotherdirection.Eachoftheseotherconcepts

    withinthemoreencompassinglovesystem–thedesire,thebonds,theintimacy,the

    commitments–alsofacilitatesubsequentmomentsoflove-the-emotion,creating

    thedynamicsofanupwardspiral.Putsimply,it’sfareasierfortwoormorepeople

    toconnectwhentheirdesire,bonds,intimacy,orcommitmentsarepresentand

    strong.

    Perhapsit’snowonderthatlovehaspuzzledsomanyforsolong.Partofthe

    confusionisthattheword“love”hasbeenaffixedtodifferentpartsofthislarger,

    dynamiclovesystem.Aprimarymissionofscience,however,istopeerintocomplex

    systemstodiscovertheordertherein.Wearenowequippedtousethelensesof

    emotionsciencetosharpenourappreciationoflove.Theselensesaddtothe

    understandingsoflovethatneighboringrelationshipscienceanddevelopmental

  • sciencehaveofferedbydrawingparticularattentiontothemomentarynatureof

    love,itsbiologicalbases,andbyofferingtheframeworkandlogicofthebroaden-

    and-buildtheoryofpositiveemotions.

    Thesharperappreciationforlovetobedevelopedherealsoilluminatesthe

    valueofmildorlow-intensityformsofthisconsequentialstate.Mildformsoflove-

    the-emotionaretooofteneclipsedbytheoverwhelmingintensityofselectlove

    experiences,theonesthatforgelife’sstrongestbonds,suchasthosebetweenan

    infantandhercaregivers,orbetweentwonewromanticpartnersjustnow“falling

    inlove.”Thestudyofpositiveemotions,however,cautionsresearchersnottobe

    blindedbyintensity:Ampleempiricalevidencerevealsthatthefrequencyof

    pleasantaffectivestatesisfarmoreconsequentialthantheintensityofthosestates

    (Diener,Sandvik,Pavot,1991;Folkman,1997;Isen,1993),andthatthe

    consequencesofmildpleasantaffectivestatesforhealthandwell-beingare

    considerable(Cohn,Fredrickson,Brown,Mikels,&Conway,2009;Moskowitz,2003;

    Fredrickson,Cohn,Coffey,Pek&Finkel,2008).Love-the-emotionlikelyfollowsthis

    samepattern.Mildyetconsequentialformsoflovecaninfuseeverydaypositive

    connectionsbetweenandamongfamily,friends,acquaintances–evenstrangers–to

    forgeandfortifybonds,alliances,meaning,andpurpose,aswellascommunityand

    collectivehealthandwell-being.

    TowardaFormalDefinitionofLove-the-Emotion

    ViewsfromEmotionScience

    Emotionscientistsdistinguishbetweenloveexperiencesandlove

    relationships(Lazarus,1991),anddirecttheirfocustotheformer,thetransient

  • feelingstatesoflove,ratherthanthelatter,thelong-standingsocialtiesthatare

    infusedwith,andsupportedbylove-the-emotion.Evenso,itbearsunderscoring

    thattransientexperiencesoflovearefelttowardandwithspecificindividuals(e.g.,

    one’smother,friend,lover,orchild),andarethereforecontextualizedbythese

    interpersonalconnections.Manytheoristshavepointedoutthatloveisnotactually

    asingleemotionalstate,butrathercomesinmultipleforms,somemoretenderand

    low-key,andothersmorejoyfulandhigh-energy.AsRempelandBurris(2005)put

    it,“loveseemstobereflectedinmultipleemotionsratherthanonedistinctemotion”

    (p.298).Supportingthisview,inexamining14pleasantemotions,Ellsworthand

    Smith(1988)foundthatlovewasamongtheleastdifferentiated.

    WhereasRempelandBurris(2005)uselove’slackofspecificitytoarguethat

    loveisnot,infact,anemotion,othertheorists,likeIzard(1977)andFredrickson

    (1998)usethissameobservationtosupportadifferent,contextualizedviewoflove.

    Thisalternateviewholdsthatexperiencesoflovecanbeseenastheexperienceof

    anyotherpositiveemotionwhenthatemotionisfeltinthecontextofasafe,often

    closerelationship.ForIzard(1977),whoatthetimeidentifiedonlyinterestandjoy

    asamongtheotherpositiveemotionsheconsidered,lovewastakentobethejoy

    andinterestthatpeoplefeelinconnectionwithothers.Inhiswords,“acquaintances

    orfriendsrenewyourinterestbyrevealingnewaspectsofthemselvesandthe

    resultingincreaseinfamiliarity(deeperknowledgeoftheperson)bringsjoy.In

    lastingfriendshipsorloverelationshipsthiscycleisrepeatedendlessly”(1977,p.

    243).

  • Morerecently,Fredrickson(2009)expandedonIzard’s(1977)illustrationto

    includeeightadditionalpositiveemotionsalongsidetheappraisalpatterns

    associatedwitheach,arguingthateachofthesemomentsmightbeequally

    describedaslove:

    Intheearlystagesofarelationship,tiedupwithyourinitialattraction,you’re

    deeplyinterestedinanythingandeverythingthisnewpersonsaysanddoes.

    Youshareamusementsandlaughtogether,oftenasaresultofthe

    awkwardnessofcomingtogetherforthefirsttime.Asyourrelationship

    buildsandperhapssurpassesyourexpectations,itbringsgreatjoy.Youbegin

    toshareyourhopesanddreamsforyourfuturetogether.Astherelationship

    becomesmoresolid,yousinkbackintothecozyserenity[contentment]that

    comeswiththesecurityofmutuallove.You’regratefulforthejoysyour

    belovedbringsintoyourlife,asproudoftheirachievementsasyouareof

    yourown,inspiredbytheirgoodqualities,andperhapsinaweoftheforcesof

    theuniversethatbroughtyoutwotogether.(Fredrickson,2009,p.47).

    FollowingIzard’sfootsteps,myearliestscholarlydescriptionoflove-the-

    emotiontookan“alloftheabove”approach,definingitasanypositiveemotionfelt

    inthecontextofasafe,oftencloserelationship(Fredrickson,1998).AlthoughIstill

    holdthatacknowledgingthemanydifferentflavorsoflove-the-emotionisavital

    step,fortworeasons,Inowseethatthisstepisn’tnearlybigenough.Firstand

    foremost,thisearlierconceptualizationremainsaone-personpsychology,

    positioningtheotherpersonasmerelythe“context”forthefocalperson’s

    experienceoflove.Aricherunderstandingoflove-the-emotionemergeswhenwe

  • widenthelenstoalsoincludewhattheotherpersonis,atthatsamemoment,

    feeling.Steppinguptothistwo-personpsychology,2Inowmorespecificallyposition

    love-the-emotionasemerginganytimeapositiveemotionismomentarilysharedby

    two(ormore)individuals.Second,Ifindtheemphasisonestablishedclose

    relationshipstobelimitingandunjustifiable.Initialorone-timeconnectionswith

    novelinteractionpartnerscanalsosupporttheemergenceofsharedpositive

    emotions.Thedifferencesbetweentheseconnectionsandthosethatemergewithin

    closerelationshipsmaybelargelyamatterofdegree,ratherthankind.

    So,toexpandthescopeofpastconceptualizationsoflovewithinemotion

    science,Ipositherethatonecoreelementoflove-the-emotionissharedpositive

    emotions.Tolaythefoundationfortwoadditionalcoreelements,Ioutlineviews

    offeredbyrelationshipscienceanddevelopmentalscienceinturn.

    ViewsfromRelationshipScience

    Adominantapproachwithinrelationshipscienceistodemarkdifferenttypes

    ofloverelationships.Berscheid(2010),forinstance,identifiescompanionate,

    romantic,compassionate,aswellasattachmentloverelationships(seealsoHatfield

    &Rapson,1993;Sternberg,1986;Fehr,Sprecher,&Underwood2008;Fisher,Aron,

    Mashek,Li,&Brown,2002).Recentadvancesinunderstandinglove,forinstance,

    haveexploredtheuniqueneuralcorrelatesofromanticversuscompanionatelove

    (Acevedo,Aron,Fisher&Brown,2012).

    Whereasthesevariousformsoflovecertainlydifferfromoneanother,they

    alsosharecertainfamilyresemblances.Incontrasttothedominantapproachof

    definingloveasaprototype(Fehr1988;Shaver,Schwartz,Kirson&O’Connor,

  • 1987),recentworkbyHegiandBergner(2010)attemptstoarticulateaformal

    definitionoflove,onethatidentifiesnecessaryandsufficientconditionsforusing

    thewordlovecorrectlyacrossarangeofloverelationships.Buildingonworkby

    Clarkandcolleaguesoncommunalrelationships(Clark&Mills,1979;Clark&

    Monin,2006),aswellasworkbySinger(1984)andRempelandBurris(2005),Hegi

    andBergner(2010)hypothesizethatessentialtoarangeofloverelationships–

    companionate,romantic,compassionate,andattachment–is“investmentinthe

    well-beingoftheother,forhisorherownsake”(Hegi&Bergner,2010,p.621).

    Theydrawsupportfortheirhypothesisfromsurveysthatcapturerespondents’

    schemasforwhatcountsaslove.Specifically,respondentsconsiderhypothetical

    examplesofdifferenttypesofrelationshipsinwhichacertainrelationship

    characteristicismissingonthepartofoneindividualintherelationship,and

    indicatethedegreetowhichtheywouldfinditcontradictorytosaythatthisperson

    lovestheotherunderthosecircumstances.Inexaminingrelationshipcharacteristics

    rangingfromsimilarityandtrusttoexclusivityandenjoyment,theyfoundthatonly

    theabsenceof“investmentinthewell-beingoftheotherforhisorherownsake”

    wasdeemed“verycontradictory”tothepresenceofaloverelationshipbythevast

    majorityofrespondents(Hegi&Bergner,2010).Theauthorsusethesedatato

    arguethatsuchinvestmentisanecessaryandessentialfeatureofhumanloveof

    variouskinds.Assuch,love,bydefinition,conveysacaringorientationtoward

    others.

    Theinterpersonalcounterparttolove’scaringorientationtowardtheother

    appearstobetheconceptof“perceivedpartnerresponsivenesstotheself,”which

  • reflectstheextenttowhichtheotherpersonregistersthatheorsheisbeing

    attentivelycaredfor(e.g.,Reis,Clark,&Holmes,2004).Thatis,totheextentthat

    PersonAinvestsinthewell-beingofPersonB,forB’sownsake,PersonBmaycome

    tobelievethatPersonAunderstandsandvalueshimorher,andresponds

    supportively.Perceivedpartnerresponsivenessispositionedas“acardinalprocess

    inclosenessandintimacy”(Reisetal,2004,p.220;seealsoLaurenceau,Barrett,&

    Pietromonaco,1998),particularlywithincommunalrelationships.Assessmentsof

    thedegreetowhichanotherpersonunderstands,caresfor,andvalidatesyouinform

    youroverarchingbeliefthatthisotherpersontruly“getsyou,”anduseshisorher

    privilegedknowledgethoughtfully,foryourbenefit.Responsiveparentingisalsoa

    cornerstoneconceptwithinattachmenttheory(Bowlby,1969/1982),withstudies

    showingthatparentalresponsivenesstoachild’sneedsistherootofsecure

    attachmentandthedevelopmentofstableandpositiveinternalmodelsofselfin

    relationtoothers(Bowlby,1969/1982;Ainsworth,Blehar,Waters,&Wall,1978),

    whichinturnshapethoughts,emotions,andbehaviorthroughoutchildhoodand

    intoadulthood(Mikulinceretal.,2009).

    Researchonperceivedresponsivenessunderscoresthatloveisnota

    unidirectionalphenomenon,concerningoneperson’sfeelingstowardanother,butis

    insteadabidirectionaltransaction,inwhicheachperson’sperceptionsoftheother’s

    feelingstowardtheselfarealsovitaltotheemergenceofintimacy.Responsiveness

    isknowntobeconsequentialacrossarangeofemotionalexchanges.Forinstance,

    whenonememberofaromanticcouplethankstheother(Algoe,Fredrickson,&

    Gable,2013),orreactsastheothersharessomepersonalgoodfortune(Gable,

  • Gonzaga,&Strachman,2006),theextenttowhichtheotherpersonperceivesthat

    thanksorthatreactiontoberesponsiveforecastsfuturerelationalwell-being,and

    eventhelongevityoftherelationship.Responsivenessmayalsobeconsequentialto

    physicalhealth.AnationalU.S.surveyofindividualsofmarriedorcohabitatingwith

    aromanticpartnerfoundthathighreceivedemotionalsupportfromthepartneris

    associatedwithincreasedmortalityriskforthosewhoratetheirpartnersaslacking

    responsiveness,whereasthisriskisabsentamongthosewhoratetheirpartnersas

    highinresponsiveness(Selcuk&Ong,2013).

    Althoughmoststudiedwithincommunalrelationships,responsiveness–and

    theperceptionofit–canalsocharacterizeexchangerelationships,evenone-time

    encounterswithstrangers.Asatravelertoanunfamiliarcity,forinstance,youmay

    cometoappreciatethatthebaristawhomakesyourmorningbrewisespecially

    attunedtoyourwishesandmood,eagertopleaseandconnect.Asyoumakeyour

    economictransaction,thetwoofyousmileandchatwitheaseandopenness.

    Walkingawayfromthisexchange,youmightfeelmoreupliftedandenergizedthan

    you’dfeltjustmomentsago.Duttonandcolleaguesdescribesuchencountersas

    high-qualityconnections,orHQCs(Stephens,Heaphy,&Dutton,2012;seealso

    Heaphy&Dutton,2008).HQCsareshort-term,positiveinteractionsthatare

    experiencedasenlivening,characterizedbymutualperceivedresponsiveness.

    Althoughthesepositiveencountersmaybepartofongoingrelationships,theyneed

    notbe.Theycanalsoreadilyemergewithinone-timeencounterswithshopkeepers

    orcustomers,healthcareprovidersorpatients,oranytimetwoormorepeople

    interact.

  • Rapportisalsocommonlyusedtodescribethesortsofpositiveconnections

    thatemergebetweenandamongpeoplewhoaresaidto“click”orhave“chemistry.”

    Conceptually,rapportisanemergent,interpersonalphenomenonmarkedbymutual

    attentiveness,positivity,andcoordination(Tickle-Degnen&Rosenthal,1990),all

    thehallmarksofresponsiveness.Nonverbally,rapportisembodiedthroughmutual

    directbodyorientationandgaze,accompaniedbysmiles,nods,forwardleans

    (Tickle-Degnen&Rosenthal,1990)aswellasbehavioralsynchrony

    (Vacharkulksemsuk&Fredrickson,2012).Whereastheconcept“love,”inits

    traditionalusage,tendstoimplylong-standingintimaterelationships,theconceptof

    “rapport”allbutimpliesalackofintimacyandhistory.Bycontrast,Iholdthatthe

    conceptsof“love”and“rapport”maydifferprimarilyindegree,ratherinkind,and

    thatitmaybemoregenerativetoconsiderthemasexamplesofthesameunderlying

    biopsychosocialphenomenon.

    Forthepresentpurposes,Idenotethereciprocalcombinationof“investment

    inthewell-beingoftheother,forhisorherownsake”and“perceivedpartner

    responsivenesstotheself”bytheshorthandphrasemutualcare.Althoughmutual

    careisperhapsmostobviouswithinpeople’slong-standingloverelationships–

    with,forinstance,romanticpartnersandotherfamilymembers–itisnotan

    exclusivepropertyofthesecommunalrelationships.Inmilder,perhapsless

    obviousforms,mutualcarecanalsoinfusemorecasualencounterswithfriends,co-

    workers,acquaintances,evenstrangers.Indeed,anytimeembodiedrapportor

    high-qualityconnectionsemerge,mutualcareis,bydefinition,present.Importantly,

    thiscareisneitherheavy-handednorrole-bound,asinbeingacaregiver.Ratherit

  • isaslight,nonconscious,andmomentaryastheunbiddenconcernyou’dfeelifthe

    personwithwhomyouwereconnectingsuddenlyhadaheavyobjectfallonheror

    hisfoot:you’dwincetoo,thenquicklyassessyourcompanion’swell-being.Mutual

    caredescribesastateinwhicheachpersonwouldshowthisminimallevelof

    engagementwith,concernfor,andinvestmentinthewell-beingoftheother.Iposit

    thatmutualcareisasecondcoreelementoflove-the-emotion.

    ViewsfromDevelopmentalScience

    Ifmutualcare–withitshallmarkmutualconcernfortheother’swell-being

    andmutualperceivedresponsiveness–istakenasanadditionalcoreelementof

    love-the-emotion,itmightseemthatencountersorrelationshipsthatinvolve

    dependenceorasymmetry–aswithaninfant,orchild(oranotherwiseneedy

    individual)withaparentorcaregiver–areruledoutofsuchmutuality.While

    dotingparentsclearlylovetheirnewborns,cantheirnewbornstrulylovethem

    back?Withtheirlimitedcapacities,howcannewbornsmusteruptheselflessother-

    focusthatdefineslove?

    Thewayoutofthisseemingconundrumistorecognizethatwarmth-infused

    other-focusrequiresnomusteringatall.Rather,itunfoldsautomaticallyand

    effortlessly,completelywithouthighersymbolicoreffortfulmentalprocesses.

    Indeed,developmentalpsychologistshavearguedthat,frombirth,infantsare

    biologicallypreparedtoperceivecross-modalcorrespondencesbetweenwhatthey

    seeontheirinteractionpartners’facesandwhattheysense,proprioceptively,on

    theirownfaces(Meltzoff&Moore,1989;Trevarthen,1998).Thisabilityiswhat

    enablesinfantstosynchronizetheirmovements–inform,tempo,andintensity–

  • withthoseofothers,totheextentthattheirmotorcontrolallows(Meltzoff&Moore,

    1989).

    Notably,behavioralsynchronygoesbeyondmimicrybecausematchingoften

    occursacrossmodalities,suchaswhentherhythmofaninfant’smovementssync

    upwiththerhythmofhermother’svocalizations.Suchcross-modalanalogiespoint

    toaresonancebetweeninfantsandtheirinteractionpartnersatthelevelof

    subjectivemindstatesandemotions,andnotmerelyatthelevelofobservable

    behaviors.Behavioralsynchronycanthusbetakentorevealanintersubjectivity

    (Beebe,Sorter,Rustin,&Knoblauch,2003),oraffectiveattunement(Stern,1985),

    describedasaninnateformofintimacy,awaytofindandshowdelightin

    communing,connecting,orbeingwithanother.Throughsuchaffectivesharing,an

    infant“experiencesbeingexperienced”(Beebeetal.,2003,p.786)or“feel[s]felt”by

    theother(Siegel,2001,p.78),amomentaryexperienceakintowhatrelationship

    scientists,asdescribedabove,havetermed“perceivedpartnerresponsivenessto

    theself.”Importantly,“feelingfelt”isitselfapositiveemotionalexperience(Beebe

    etal.,2003).

    Developmentalsciencehasalsoshownthattheattentivedanceofbehavioral

    synchronythatemergesbetweeninfantsandtheirresponsivecaregivers–adance

    lacedwithsmiles,coosandothergesturesofpositivity–isabsolutelyvitaltonormal

    humandevelopment,asvitalagoodnutrition(Stern,1985;Siegel,2001).Theclassic

    “still-faceparadigm,”forinstance,revealshowavidlyinfantsseekitout.

    Researcherswhousethisparadigminviteparent-infantdyadstothelaboratoryto

    videotapethemduringtypicalface-to-faceplay,afterafewminutesofwhichthe

  • researcherssignaltheparenttoadoptastill,neutralface,whilemaintainingeye

    contactwithherorhisinfant.Theparent’sstillfacesendsamixedmessagetothe

    infant:theparent’sgazesignalsreadinesstoengage,yetherorhispassiveface

    conveysunavailability.Behavioralcodingofinfantresponsestothestill-face

    paradigmrevealsthat,inthefirsthalf-minuteorso,infantstypicallycontinueto

    gazeandsmileattheirparent,making“positivebids”forreengagement.These

    hopefulbidsaredestinedtofail,however,becauseparentsareinstructedto

    maintainapassivefacefortwominutes.Facedwiththisfailure,theinfants’

    positivitytypicallywanesandgiveswaytonegativity,markedbyloweredbrows

    andopen-mouthcries(Ekas,Haltigan,&Messinger,2013).

    Moresoberingevidenceforthedevelopmentalnecessityofthepositive

    intersubjectivitysignaledbybehavioralsynchronycomesfromcaregiverswho

    strugglewithdepression,whoarefarlesslikelytoshowthe“dance”ofbehavioral

    synchronywiththeinfantsintheircare.Studiesshowthatdepression,whichaffects

    10-12percentofpostpartummothers,slowsbothspeechandbodymovements,and

    disruptsparent-infantsynchrony(Feldman,2007).Widelyviewedasadisorderof

    thepositiveemotionsystem(Davidson,2000),depressionstiflestheemergenceof

    intersubjectivityandsharedpositivity.Ampleresearchconfirmsthatmaternal

    depressionininfancyforecastsachild’simpairmentsincognitiveandsocio-

    emotionalskillsevendecadeslater(forareview,seeFeldman,2007).

    Morerecentevidencesuggeststhatpositivebehavioralsynchrony—the

    degreetowhichaninfantandaparent(througheyecontactandaffectionatetouch)

    laugh,smile,andcootogether—correspondswithoxytocinsynchrony.Researchers

  • havemeasuredoxytocinlevelsinthesalivaofdads,moms,andinfantsbothbefore

    andafteravideotaped,face-to-faceparent-infantinteraction.Forinfant-parent

    pairswhoshowmutualpositiveengagement,oxytocinlevelsalsocomeintosync.

    Withoutsuchengagement,however,nooxytocinsynchronyemerged(Feldman,

    Gordon,&Zagoory-Sharon,2010).

    Basedontheaforementionedevidencefromdevelopmentalscience,Iposit

    thatbiobehavioralsynchronyisathirdcoreelementoflove-the-emotion.

    PushingEmotionScienceFurther:ANewHybridView

    Distinct,albeitoverlapping,viewsoflovehaveemergedwithinthe

    neighboringdisciplinesofemotionscience,relationshipscience,anddevelopmental

    science.Furtherintegratingtheseviews,Iproposeanewhybridviewthatpositions

    loveasamomentaryemotionalphenomenonthatisco-experiencedbyanytwoor

    moreinteractingpeople.Distillingtoaformaldefinition,Idefinelove-the-emotion

    asamicro-momentofpositivityresonance,duringwhichthreecoreelements–(1)

    sharedpositiveemotion,(2)mutualcare,and(3)biobehavioralsynchrony–emerge

    withtemporalcoherencebetweenandamongpeople.

    Departingfromrelationshipscience,love,asconceptualizedhere,isnotan

    enduringorintimaterelationship.Inkeeping,however,withtheadaptationistlogic

    ofthebroaden-and-buildtheoryofpositiveemotions(Fredrickson,1998,2013b),

    micro-momentsofpositivityresonancefertilizethegrowthofconsequential

    personalandsocialresources,includingenduringcloseandintimaterelationships

    aswellasmentalandphysicalhealth.

  • Takingacuefromrelationshipscience,Ialsoelevatemicro-momentsof

    positivityresonanceabovetheexperiencesofotherpositiveemotions.Thatis,I

    hypothesizethatpositivitythatresonatesbetweenandamongpeopleisparticularly

    efficientforbuildingconsequentialresources,relativetopositiveemotionsthatare

    experiencedinisolationorabsenttheelementsofmutualcareandbiobehavioral

    synchrony.Accordingly,Ihavecalledoutloveas“oursupremeemotion”

    (Fredrickson,2013a).Thisapproachdepartssharplyfromanunspokentradition

    withinemotionscience,whichimplicitlytakespecific,discernableemotions–fear,

    anger,joy,andpride–asroughlyequal-statuscategories,eachholdingvaluefor

    humansurvivalinitsownway.Underthistraditionallogic,noemotion,love

    included,issetapartasonadifferentplane,orscaleofimportance.Bycontrast,

    relationshipscienceunabashedlypositionsloverelationshipsasdistinctfromother

    relationshipsandmoreconsequentialtohumanwelfare.Likewise,foritsabilityto

    weaveindividualsintothesocialfabricofcommunity,love-the-emotionmaywellbe

    moreconsequentialtohumanwelfarethananyotheremotion.

    MileageGainedfromtheConceptofPositivityResonance

    PreconditionsforPositivityResonance

    Micro-momentsofpositivityresonancebetweenandamongpeopledonot

    emergeatrandom,regardlessofconditions.Inthisway,loveisnotunconditional.(I

    acknowledgethatIdeploytheterm“unconditional”inadifferentmannerthanhave

    humanisticpsychologists.)Love’sfirstprecondition,Iposit,isperceivedsafety.As

    formostpositiveemotions,momentaryperceptionsofsafetyappeartobean

    importantprerequisite.Whenpeopleappraisetheircurrentcircumstancesas

  • somehowthreateningordangerous,theabilitytoshareanexperienceofpositivity

    resonancebecomeshighlyimprobable.Fortunately,truethreatstosafetyare

    statisticallyrare:Mostmomentsarebenign(Oishi,Diener,Choi,Kim-Prieto,&Choi,

    2007).Yet,unfortunately,manypeopledonotexperiencethesafetyinwhichtheir

    livesareembedded.Thosewhosufferfromanxiety,depression,loneliness,orlow

    self-esteem,forinstance,perceivethreatsfarmoreoftenthantheirobjective

    circumstanceswarrant(e.g.,Cacioppo&Hawkley,2009).Thisover-alertstate

    thwartstheemergenceofallpositiveemotions,includinglove.Moregenerally,the

    inabilitytoexperiencesafetyinthecompanyofothersisapoignantobstacletolove.

    Love’ssecondprecondition,Iposit,issensoryconnection.Neitherabstract

    normediated,sensoryconnectionisphysicalandunfoldsinrealtime.Itrequiresthe

    co-presenceofbodies,throughtouch,voice,orvisiblysynchronizedpostures,

    gestures,orfacialexpressions.Arguably,however,themainmodeofsensory

    connectioniseyecontact(Farroni,Csibra,Simion,&Johnson,2002).Newborns,for

    instance,showanimmediatepreferenceforeyecontact,aswellasinnateskillsfor

    establishingitwiththeadultswhocomeintotheirvisualrange.Eyecontactisalsoa

    gatewayconstructwithinthesimulationofsmiles(SIMS)model,articulatedby

    Niedenthalandcolleagues(Niedenthal,Mermillod,Maringer,&Hess,2010).Making

    eyecontactwithsomeonewhosmiles,accordingtotheSIMSmodel,triggersarapid

    andnonconsciousembodiedsimulationofthatsmile–throughfacialmimicryand

    neuralactivation–thatimplicitlyfunctionstodisambiguatethemeaningofthat

    smile.InsupportoftheSIMSmodel,controlledlaboratoryexperimentsconfirmthat

    mutualeyegaze,relativetoavertedgaze,triggersfacialmimicrytodynamic

  • emotionalstimuli(Schrammel,Pannasch,Graupner,Mojzisch,&Velichkovsky,

    2009),andthatfacialmimicryenablesmoreaccuratedecodingofthegenuineness

    ofdynamicsmiles(Maringer,Krumhuber,Fischer,&Niedenthal,2011).These

    processesmayaccountinfants’abilitytodetectinauthenticemotions(Walle&

    Campos,2014).Totheextentthateyecontactduringemotionalepisodestriggers

    embodiedsimulations,infants’prescientskillsformakingeyecontactcanbeviewed

    asevolvedadaptationsthathelpinfantswordlesslyandaccuratelyconveytheir

    ever-shiftingemotionalneedstoengagedcaregivers(Niedenthaletal.,2010).

    Throughsensoryconnection,then,positiveemotions“jumpthegap”between

    peopletobecomesharedexperiencesofpositivityresonance,markedbiobehavioral

    synchronyandmutualcare.

    ProductsofPositivityResonance

    Eventhoughmicro-momentsofpositivityresonanceareoftenmildandby

    definitionfleeting,theaccumulatedfrequencyoftheseexperiencesovertimebuilds

    arangeofresourcesimportanttosubjective,relational,andphysicalwell-being.For

    instance,theexperienceofpleasureor“liking”precedesandlaysthefoundationfor

    desireor“wanting”(Berridge,2007).Inthecaseofpositivityresonance,the

    pleasureoffeelingconnectedtoanewromanticpartneror“crush,”assessedasself-

    otheroverlap(Aron,Aron,&Smollan,1992),prospectivelypredictsthefrequencyof

    positiveautomaticthoughtsaboutthatperson,whichcanservetomotivate

    subsequenteffortstoreconnect(Rice,Schenker,&Fredrickson,2014).Likewise

    experiencingpositivityresonancewiththesamepersonrepeatedlyovertimebuilds

    trustandloyalty,socialattitudesvitaltosuccessfulfriendshipsandcommunity

  • alliances.Therecurrenceofpositivityresonancealsoseedsthemotivationfor

    secureattachments,socialbonds,andmoreformalcommitmentstoloyaltysuchas

    marriage(Cohn&Fredrickson,2006;Brown&Brown,2006).Asstatedpreviously,

    theseenduringresources–desire,bonds,andcommitments–arethemselves

    identifiedas“love”inbothscientificandlaywritings.Increasingscientificprecision,

    Iofferpositivityresonance(love-the-emotion),astherecurrentbiopsychosocial

    mechanisms,or“tinyengines,”thatdrivealargerlovesystemthatalsoincludes

    thesemoreenduringproductsofpositivityresonance.

    EvidenceforPositivityResonance

    Arangeofconvergingevidenceinspiredmetoformulatetheconceptof

    positivityresonanceandarticulatekeyhypothesesaboutit.Withinmyown

    laboratory,theworkofTanyaVacharkulksemsukhasbeenfoundational

    (Vacharkulksemsuk&Fredrickson,2012).SheandIstudiedpairsofpreviously

    unacquainteddyadsthatwehadrandomlyassignedtocompleteoneoftwo

    interactiontasks,whichwevideotaped:eitheravariantofAron’sself-disclosure

    inductionparadigm(Aron,Melinat,Aron,Vallone,&Bator,1997),oraneutral,

    collaborativeproof-readingtask.Trainedcoderslaterviewedthemutedvideo

    recordingsandratedtheextentofsimultaneousmovement,temposimilarity,and

    coordinationandsmoothnessinthedyad’snonverbalbehaviors,whichwethen

    summedintoanaggregateindexofbehavioralsynchrony.Welearnedthatthe

    physicalanddynamicpropertyofbehavioralsynchronymediatedtheassociation

    betweenself-disclosureconditionandsubsequentreportsofembodiedrapport,

    evenwhencontrollingforreportsofpositiveemotion(Vacharkulksemsuk&

  • Fredrickson,2012).Ourevidencefortheimportanceofnaturally-occurring

    behavioralsynchronycomplementsresearchthathasmanipulatedbehavioral

    synchronytoshowthatitbreedsaffiliation(Hove&Risen,2009),cooperation

    (Wiltermuth&Heath,2009),andcompassion(Valdesolo&DeSteno,2011).

    Goingbeyondbehavioralsynchrony–andunseenwithinordinary

    interactions–isthebiologicalsynchronythatemergeswhentwoormorepeople

    shareapositiveemotionalstate.Aspreviouslymentioned,oxytocinsynchrony

    arisesduringpositiveinteractionswithinparent-infantdyads(Feldmanetal.,

    2010).Morecompellingstillisevidencefromrecentneuroimagingstudiesthat

    showwidespreadneuralsynchronywithindyadsandgroupssharingapositive

    emotionalexperience(Hasson,2010;Hasson,Nir,Levy,Fuhrmann,&Malach,2004;

    Stephens,Silbert,Hasson,2010).Itappears,then,thatwhenpeopleshareapositive

    emotionalstate,theyalsosharegestural,biochemical,andneuralpatterns.This

    momentarybiobehavioralsynchronyunifiestheinteractingindividualswithina

    sharedexperienceofpositiveresonance.

    Twoadditionalstreamsofevidencealsocontributedtomytheorizingon

    love.First,along-standingbodyofprospectivestudiesshowsthathavingdiverse

    andrewardingsocialrelationshipsrobustlyforecastsbetterphysicalhealthand

    greaterlongevity.Forinstance,arecentmeta-analysisof148studiesconcludesthat

    theinfluenceofsocialintegrationonmortalityriskisonparwiththatofother,well-

    establishedhealthriskfactors,includingsmoking,excessivealcoholintake,obesity,

    andlackofphysicalexercise(Holt-Lunstad,Smith,&Layton,2010).Second,

    conspicuouslysimilarprospectiveevidencelinksthefrequentexperienceofpositive

  • emotionstolivinglongerandhealthierlives(formeta-analyticreviews,seeChida&

    Steptoe,2008,andHowell,Kern,&Lyubomirsky,2007).Unitingthesetwostreams

    ofevidence,recentworkfrommylaboratoryshowsthatperceivedpositivesocial

    connections–aproxymeasureofpositivityresonance–accountsforthe

    relationshipbetweenpositiveemotionsandphysicalhealth(Kok,Coffey,Cohn,

    Catalino,Vacharkulksemsuk,Algoe,Brantley,&Fredrickson,2013).Specifically,

    people’sdailyexperiencesoffeeling“close”and“intune”withtheirsocial

    interactionpartnersmediatedtheeffectofanexperimentalinterventionthattaught

    studyparticipantshowtoself-generatepositiveemotions(vialoving-kindness

    meditation,seealsoFredricksonetal.,2008)onimprovementsincardiacvagal

    tone,aproxymeasureofphysicalhealth.Thus,itappearsthatwhenpeople’sefforts

    tocultivatepositiveemotionsculminateinexperiencesofday-to-daypositivity

    resonancewithothers,theyincurparticularbooststotheirphysicalhealth.Much

    likeourday-to-dayhabitsofbeingphysicallyactiveandeatingnutritiousfoods,our

    day-to-dayhabitsofcultivatingpositivityresonancewithothersmaywellfunction

    aspositivehealthbehaviors.

    ResearchAgenda

    Researchontheconceptofpositivityresonanceremainsscant,tobesure.As

    such,opportunitiesaboundtotestandrefinethisnewdefinitionoflove.Keytothe

    successofthisworkwillbethedevelopmentofvalidandreliablemeasuresof

    positivityresonancethathonoritsmomentaryandmultifacetednature.Although

    self-reportmeasuresmaycapturethephenomenologicalaspectsofpositivity

    resonance,nonverbalbehavioralandbiologicalmeasureswithappropriate

  • temporalresolutiongatheredfrominteractingdyadswillalsobeessential.In

    addition,longitudinalresearchwillbeneededtotesttheclaimthatpositivity

    resonancemeritselevationaboveotherpositiveemotionsinitsabilitytoaugment

    well-beingandphysicalhealth.Longitudinalanddynamicstatisticalmodelingmay

    beespeciallyrelevanttoolsasthisresearchareamatures.

    TheoreticalImplications

    Whatgoodisasmile?What’sitfor?Althougharangeofpasttheoristshave

    addressedthesequestions,thenewconceptofpositivityresonanceoffersafresh

    takeontheevolvedadaptivefunctionofspontaneousandgenuinesmiles–what

    havebeentermedDuchennesmilesintheresearchliterature.FollowingCharles

    Darwin(1872/1998),Ekmanandcolleaguescontendthatsuchsmilesevolvedasan

    outwardexpressionorreadoutofaperson’sotherwiseunseeninnersubjective

    state(Ekman,Davidson,&Friesen,1990).Anopposingviewshiftsthefocusonto

    therecipientofasmile,andproposesthatsmilesevolvednotbecausetheyprovided

    readoutsofpositiveemotionalstates,butinsteadbecausetheyevokedpositive

    emotionsinthosewhomeetasmilingperson’sgaze(Owren&Bachorowski,2003;

    seealsoGervais&Wilson,2005).Maintainingthefocusonthepersonwhomeets

    thesmiler’sgaze,theembodiedcognitionperspectiveoftheSIMSmodelsuggests

    that,throughneuralsimulation,smilestuneanobservertowardabetter

    understandingthesmiler’ssubjectiveexperienceandmotives,sothattheperceiver

    can,forinstance,disambiguatesincereaffiliativebidsfromdomineeringorself-

    absorbedsmiles(Niedenthaletal.,2010).Eachoftheseaccountsofthefunctionof

    genuinesmilesseemsviable,albeiteachremainsincompletebyremaininganchored

  • tooexclusivelywithinaone-personpsychology(focusedeitherontheoneperson

    whosmilesortheonepersonwhowitnessesasmile).

    Steppinguptoatwo-personpsychology,inwhichboththesmilingindividual

    andthesmilerecipientplayequalandimportantroles,Iproposethatthefunctionof

    atleastasubsetofDuchennesmilesis“alloftheabove”andthensome.Specifically,

    theadaptivesignificanceofagenuine,affiliativesmilemaybetocreatea

    momentarilyunifiedmindsetbetweentwopeople,orintersubjectivity,thatis

    characterizedbypositivityresonance,asreflectedbythetriooflove’sfeatures:a

    nowsharedpositiveemotion,biobehavioralsynchrony,andanorientationtoward

    mutualcare.Researchdocumentsthatasmiledrawsoureyemorethanotherfacial

    expression(Becker,Anderson,Mortensen,Neufeld,&Neel,2011).Aswe’veseen,

    eyecontactnonconsciouslytriggersfacialmimicry(Schrammeletal.,2009),which

    inturntriggersneuralsimulation(Niedenthaletal.,2010).Whentheoriginalsmile

    emanatesfromasincereaffiliativebid,themomentaryintersubjectivitycreatedby

    neuralsynchronywillincludeorientationstowardmutualcareandresponsivity.In

    short,theevolvedadaptivesignificanceofgenuineaffiliativesmilesmaybetoseed

    statesofpositivityresonance.Harkeningbacktothebroaden-and-buildtheory

    (Fredrickson,1998,2013b),totheextentthatpositivityresonancebuilds

    consequentialpersonalandsocialresources,genuineaffiliativesmilesmayhave

    evolvedtospurpositivepsychosocialdevelopmentandimprovedphysicalhealthin

    individuals,relationships,andindeedwholecommunities.Castingloveasamicro-

    momentofpositivityresonance,then,offersadetailedevolutionaryperspectiveon

  • howgenuinesmilescanseedthelife-enhancingstatesofpositivityresonanceand

    thusdogood,bothwithinthebodyandwithinsociety.

    Conclusions

    Love,definedasmicro-momentsofpositivityresonance,maythusbethe

    mostgenerativeandconsequentialofallpositiveemotions.Byvirtueofbeinga

    singlestate,distributedacrossandreverberatingbetweentwoormorebrainsand

    bodiesatonce,love’sabilitytobroadenmindsetsandbuildresourcesmayhave

    substantiallygreaterreach.Love,then,isnotsimplyanotherpositiveemotion.

    Rather,it’sthemomentaryphenomenonthroughwhichwefeelandbecomepartof

    somethinglargerthanourselves.Meaninginlifemaythusemergenotfromthe

    grandandunrealisticutopianidealsof“happily-ever-after”love,butfromwhatart

    historianNicholasBourriaud(1998)callsthe“day-to-daymicro-utopias”ofshared

    positivity.

    Seeingloveaspositivityresonancealsoblurstheboundariesthatsurround

    theconceptofemotion.Many,ifnotmost,scientificdescriptionsofemotionslocate

    theseaffectivephenomenawithinindividuals,confinedwithinoneperson’smind

    andskin.Bycontrast,theconceptofpositivityresonancealignswithperspectives

    offeredwithinculturalpsychologythatpositionemotionsasunfoldingbetweenand

    amongpeopleastheyinteract(e.g.,Mesquita,2001).Seeingemotionsasproperties

    ofindividualsmayindeedbeamyopicby-productoftheWesterntendencyto

    perceptuallyextractfocalobjectsfromtheircontextualsurround(e.g.,Masuda&

    Nisbett,2001).Bycontrast,positioningloveasadynamicprocessthatunfurls

  • acrossandunifiestwoormoreinteractingindividualsoffersparsimonytoaccounts

    ofthesocialandsocietalfunctionsofpositiveemotions.

    Seeingloveaspositivityresonancealsoholdspracticalimplicationsforhow

    peoplemightstrengthentheirrelationships,familiesandcommunities.Strivingto

    improvethesedirectlycanbeliketellingacompletestranger“trustme”inthe

    absenceofanytrustworthyactions.Bycontrast,knowingthatrelationships,

    families,andcommunitiesgrowstrongertotheextentthatpositivityresonates

    betweenandamongpeoplerevealsthevalueofplanningforandprioritizing

    positivity.Creatingactivitiesandsafecontextsthatallowreal-timesensory

    connectionandsupporttheemergenceofsharedpositiveemotionsbecomesthe

    pathwaytobuildsocialbondsandcommunity.Thisguidancemaybeespecially

    valuablewithincontemporaryurbanculturesthatpropelpeopletowardmulti-

    taskingandtechnology-mediatedsocialconnections.AsnovelistUrsulaLeGuin

    (1971)putit:“Lovedoesn’tjustsitthere,likeastone;ithastobemade,likebread;

    remadeallthetime,madenew.”

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  • 1Evenso,scientificinvestigationsoflovehavebeenstifledbycontroversy.Ittookcourageandcreativity,forinstance,forsocialpsychologistsEllenBerscheidandElaineHatfieldtosustaintheirpioneeringeffortstostudyromanticloveinthefaceofwhat’scometobecalled“l’affaireProxmire”(Reis,2012)Thisreferstothe1974debacleinwhichWisconsinSenatorWilliamProxmiresingledoutBerscheidandHatfield’sNSF-sponsoredresearchonloveforhisfirstofmanyGoldenFleeceAwards,bestowedtohighlightwhathedeemedtobeoutrageousandshamefullywastefulusesoffederaltaxdollars.2ForsimplicityI’vedescribelove-the-emotionasapropertyofdyads.Importantly,Iseeitasequallyabletoaccountforcommunalexperiencesofsharedpositivity,orwhatHaidtandcolleaguesrefertoasaninnatehivepsychologywhichperiodicallypropelshumanstolosethemselvesenjoyablyinamuchlargersocialorganism,likethecrowdatafootballgame,musicfestival,orreligiousrevival(Haidt,Seder,&Kesebir,2008).Throughphysicalco-presenceandbehavioralsynchrony,love-the-emotioncanthusalsospreadfromdyadstowholecrowdsorcommunities(e.g.,Fowler&Christakis,2008).