Life's Gravy - superHERO

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In this issue: interview with Hamish Ridley-Steele & Diana Brahms! Also - interesting articles, stories with a twist and inspiring poems about superheroes. Savour your time with Life's Gravy!

Transcript of Life's Gravy - superHERO

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H ow do you define a superhero? Where is the dividing line between a superhero and a vigilante or a wrestler? Or a god? Is Sherlock Holmes one of them? He’s got his sidekick even. Or is it

Mahatma Gandhi or Yuri Gagarin? Are you?

Superhero stories are undeniably the modern type of fairytales with just a bit more up-to-date imagination of what a human can be. Run faster, fly on your own, regenerate quicker and from more severe injuries. This is how we want to be, how we perceive possible future for humanity. Hence our obsession with these tales. Moreover, it’s a bliss to see how, unlike bed-time stories of the past, superheroes have a strong scientific basis (or at least tend to) - be it genetics or mechanical engineering or invention of new materials and discovery of intricate use of laws of physics.

Friedrich Nietzsche proposed that a human is an intermediary, a step before the superhuman (Übermensch). Today the world is moving as fast as ever with scientific progress and society leaping forward in questions of morality and law. I think we are approaching the great shift in what a human being is and the only term that comes to mind is SUPERHERO.

In this issue we have 2 large interviews: one with Hamish Ridley-Steele, author of DEADENDIA, Pantheon and MarvelousMondays blog; and the other with Diana Brahms, a rising star of superhero animation from Mexico. We also have two uplifting poems; a piece by Philip Morcom which proves the point that everyone wants to be a superhero; a kind of depressing drabble by me, for which I am sorry; a short story by a madman a.k.a. Fedor; and featured in our invisible section - a story like you’ve never read in your life (and never will!) to start a series of short stories by Anton “Revokat” Fadeev.

Thank you for choosing Life’s Gravy among many other only a bit less interesting things to read. Savor your time!

Xiena Ria Lin Editor-in-Chief

(pictured here as yet another Hawkeye)[email protected]

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Xiena Ria LinEditor-in-Chief, answers your letters,

conducts interviews, compiles the playlist, edits contributors’ works, does

stuff.

Maria Ku (grrrenadine)The killjoy responsible for the cover art &

design.

LeikoWind of change in human form.

Genderfluid, will whisper weird stuff in your ears. Prefers non-human friends.

Phillip MorcomAmateur physicist, professional

geographer. An artistically inclined hermit with initiative.

Fedor Kokorev, Esq. (not really) Doctors hate him - and they should, him

being the ungodly abomination he is!

Emma BlackwellA mad, mad person; member of a

superhero team; writer and cinemalover.

Anya KouznetsovaLazy.

Anton “Revokat” FadeevAuthor of an invisible short story in this

issue, whose invisibility does not make it any less appreciated or published.

ContributorsHamish Ridley-Steele: Tea with Magneto................................................4

Diana Brahms: Wrestlers are Superheroes, too!.........................9

Xby Xiena Ria Lin..................................................11

Of Heroes & Monsters & The Old Rusty Truckby Fedor Kokorev..................................................13

Mother Loves Youby Leiko.................................................................18

Making History by Xiena Ria Lin..................................................20

Let Loose by Anya Kouznetsova...........................................21

Everyone’s a Superhero by Emma Blackwell..............................................22

It’s Your Time to Be a Hero by Anya Kouznetsova...........................................23

Invisible Section: Moping Aroundby Anton «Revokat» Fadeev................................24

Classifieds...........................................................26

Mail......................................................................27

Editor’s Picks......................................................28

Closing word......................................................29

Contents

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Illustrations courtesy of Hamish Ridley-Steele

hamishsteele.co.ukhamishmash.tumblr.com@hamishsteele on twitter

Hamish Ridley-Steele: Tea With Magneto

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I met Hamish in London and we spoke about Kaiju sitting on the grass near Waterloo

on the banks of the Thames during one of the earliest Shatterdome UK meetups. He appeared to be a big squishy fan of Godzilla. Little did I know back then that the Dead End short by Cartoon Hangover - that I had seen shortly before and that was so much like my life in Camden - was created by him! Hamish is an illustrator, an animator and an author… Actually, let’s pass the word to Hamish to introduce himself.

I’m Hamish Ridley-Steele, I’m currently an animation director at Blinkink but I’ve done animation for Nickelodeon, the BBC, Frederator Studios. My best known animation is probably Dead End, a short I created for Cartoon Hangover who make Bravest Warriors and Bee and Puppycat. I recently turned that short into an ongoing web comic series DeadEndia which can be read at DeadEndia.tumblr.com. I also recently published my first graphic novel, Pantheon: The True Story of the Egyptian Deities.

How did you get into comics? What was the first comic you read?

I probably read some short comics in kids magazines or newspapers first, but the books that changed my world were the Pokémon Adventures manga when I was about 10 or 11. I really didn’t enjoy reading (and still find it very difficult being dyslexic) but I bought the first three volumes and read the repeatedly and traced over my favourite panels. My parents were delighted to see me reading anything so encouraged it.

There was a Forbidden Planet store in Bristol which was the closest comic shop to where

I lived. When I went to read more comics I was drawn to stuff that reminded me of the Pokémon manga, which had Mato’s very chibi style. This tended to lead me more to indie comics rather than superhero ones. I remember being very proud of myself for buying comics I’d never heard of which ended in mixed results but really helped expand my view of what comics could do.

I think the comics that really, really made me want to do comics though were Scott Pilgrim. I read each book the year it came out and I really felt part of something.

What are your favourite superhero comics? Which ones are you following now, if any?

I remember reading some of my brother’s Batman comics as a kid but like I said, they generally didn’t appeal to me. However, in the last few years Marvel has made a conscious effort to get more indie-inclined people like me into their books. Lots of new titles that feel slightly more separate than their main series and great artists. The first one I picked up was Hawkeye by Fraction and Aja. It was everything I wanted from a superhero series and it helped me get into the Marvel world1.

Now I regularly read All-New Ghost Rider, Ms. Marvel, Spider Gwen and the Unbeatable Squirrel Girl. And on the DC side, I really loved the recent Batwoman run that I need to finished and I can’t wait to pick up the new Shazam though! It has such beautiful artwork!

What appeals to you most in superhero comics?

I don’t enjoy people saying which is better, DC and Marvel. I enjoy both companies when they play to their strengths. DC really has a 1 A/N: Same.

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pantheon of modern mythology. Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman are icons who are more well known than any ancient god in their day. I love it when DC acknowledges and plays with how well known they are and subverting their characters. Marvel I think works best when they take the every person and throw them into their bizarre universe. Spiderman is the classic example of this, but you see it even in characters like Captain America and recently with Ms Marvel and Hawkeye. DC appeals because it’s seeing gods thrust into being human and Marvel appeals because it’s seeing humans thrust into being gods.

What superpower would you like to have? How would you use it?

I used to dream about floating about as if the air was water. I think invisibility would be the best but it’d be way too tempting to use it for pretty dubious things.

Do you think you already have a superpower? If something (e.g. radiation) would enhance some trait of yours, what would it be?

I think I’d be most likely have a bottomless stomach. All You Can Eats better watch out! (Again, I’d probably end up being a villain, it’s way too tempting!)

On your Marvelous Mondays blog you draw superhero comicbook characters and make small descriptions for them. But you have quite a unique approach to that task. How did this idea come to life?

It simply came about when someone commissioned me to draw Captain America from memory. I drew him in a sort of approximation of his costume that ended up looking pretty good and unique. So it mostly

came from the fashionista in me - I love good movie costumes. But as I kept drawing and started to develop the Marvelous Universe, the thing that struck me about these comics is although they all exist in the same universe. I know we all know that already, when you pick up a Marvel comic nowadays it’s hard to find a character who ISN’T a superhero. But think about it more.

I’ve always described the Marvelous Universe with this scene. Peter Parker comes home, just after being bitten by the spider and realising he has powers. He tells Gwen Stacey about his powers and she very casually says “Oh so you’re a mutant? Like Tony in English class?”

Peter’s like “No no! I got given these powers by a radioactive-“

Gwen interrupts, “Oh like the Hulk?”

“No, Gwen - I have to keep my identity secret!”

“Oh sorry. So like Captain Marvel?”

“No! It’s a great power! It’s a great responsibility!”

“Yeah like the Fantastic Four?”

“No! It’s-“

“Ok cool. I’m going out with Black Cat! See ya later!”

The Marvel Universe is so crowded! Every city has about 5 heroes, if that. So that’s what I think whenever I write my unique origin stories - how does this crowded world where superheroes are a dime a dozen affect the origin stories of each one.

Given that you’ve drawn so many of them already, what is your favourite superhero of all time? Why?

If you asked me this tomorrow, I’d give you

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a different answer. Today though? I suppose Batman is just the most fascinating, like in that mythological sense. He’s SO strange and SO mainstream - you can do a lot with that. I love how Batman and Robin and The Dark Knight are both as valid as each other. And he has the best villains - heroes are nothing without good villains.

With which supervillain would you like to have a cup of tea/coffee?

Magneto? Firstly, I bet he’d make a good cup of tea. But secondly - any oppressed group tends to find something very compelling about Magneto. He’s almost a power fantasy. We know we all SHOULD be like Professor X but really we all wish we could be Magneto.

What are the steps one should take to create a superhero? What do you think are the most important things in constructing such character?

There’s so many elements to a good superhero - unique powers, an iconic costume, a suitable origin story and home life. But ultimately, superheroes are fantasies. I think that’s one reason they wear masks, they could be anyone reading or watching. I don’t think there’s much point in creating a superhero who the reader doesn’t want to be. Why else do you think so many people cosplay them? There’s got to be at least some pinch of wish fulfilment. So maybe starting with something you always wished you could do - read people’s thoughts, fly, be strong, etc. And then of course if that wish came true, would you wish it had?

What is your take on modern superheroes? What would you like to see coming in future for this genre?

I hope we get variety and diversity. And in comics, they’re doing a good job with that. I mostly hope it translates to the movies. The movies absolutely affect the comics and visa versa. They just have to listen to their readers, realise who is reading them.

Do you have any plans to work on more or less traditional superhero comics? Have you always been dreaming to work for Marvel or DC or did you have other things in mind?

As I work more in directing and live action, I definitely would jump at the chance to direct a superhero film, any film! I think there’s far too many Batman films already but that’s definitely a franchise I’d love to put my stamp on.

I’d love to be involved in comics too. For a short while, I was worried my style wouldn’t be suitable for mainstream comics but with some of Marvel’s more indie titles I’ve been encouraged that they’d try anything if it was good enough. I think I’d suit a title like

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Unbeatable Squirrel Girl or Howard the Duck - something that didn’t take itself too seriously and was very meta.

I know you are both a writer and an artist of Pantheon and now DEADENDIA. Do you have plans to work with partners on comics in future? What would you like to do more - writing or illustrating?

Something I’ve enjoyed with directing is letting more talented people do the actual animation side of things. It makes for a better piece. I think if my writing got better and more specific, I’d happily collaborate with an artist but I’m not very good at describing exactly how I imagine things.

I’m actually working on Pantheon 2 with a co-writer. I already knew a lot about Ancient Egypt

but in the sequel about Norse Mythology I’m getting some help from a writer called Reece Walsh.

Even when I do work solo, I’m always bouncing ideas off of the people around me - fellow artists but also friends and family.

What inspires you in your work? Do you have any icons in comics or elsewhere who inspire you?

I have too many artistic inspirations to name. I’m so impressed by literally all artists. Right now, Rebecca Sugar, creator of Steven Universe, is a huge inspiration (and aspiration). I hope history recognises her as a serious figure in genre television. Steven Universe is so pioneering and so in line with what I want to bring to my work in comics, animation and live action. But right now I’m in a point in my career where people like her have turned from being unobtainable goals into potential future collaborators.

Any piece of advice for young writers and artists striving to get a foot in the door in comics or animation?

Take advice with a pinch of salt. No creative person really knows what they’re doing. I’m constantly doing jobs that I’m not prepared for, that I don’t think I can do. I think the only danger is only doing jobs you think you can do - don’t end up stuck and not progressing. Failure is good, knowing when to just say “hey, this isn’t working, I’m gonna leave this project” is vital. But getting SOMETHING, ANYTHING finished is the first step. Whether it’s a 10 page zine or a 200 page graphic novel, the feeling of having something finished in your hands is irreplaceable.

Thank you very much for answering our interview questions!

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Diana Brahms: Wrestlers Are Superheroes, Too!

I know Diana by her nickname Fairity. It’s rare for me to follow artists on instagram as

I reserve tumblr for that, but for Fairity I made an exception - and it was worth it all along! I think I first saw her crossover with Constantine (Vertigo comics) and Castiel (Supernatural) looking at each other, those dorks! Since then I have been a loyal fan of this beautiful person living in a magical place across the ocean from me, where people refer to wrestlers and grasshoppers as national superheroes. Hang on, she will explain everything -

My name is Diana Brahms. I was born in México, I’m 19 years old and studying Animation and digital arts here in Guadalajara city.

I usually upload my art and doodles in my instagram: @fairity_ and my tumblr account: fairity@tumblr.

How did you start drawing superheroes? What was the first comic you read or the first superhero film you saw that inspired you?

First I started drawing the national “superheroes” of my country - the Lucha libre 1fighters like El Santo2 or Blue Demon3. Then my father introduced me to the American superheroes like Batman, Superman and Wonder Woman, he used to like them a lot. Actually my name is inspired by Wonder Woman (Diana Prince).

What superpower would you like to have? How would you use it?

Another difficult question! (laughs) I’d like the ability to control space-time. Just imagine it! You can stop time during a hard test and then you could have extra time to read your textbook or just copy the answers. And yeah, you know, help humanity. (laughs)

What is the most ridiculous superpower you can think of?

What about the ability to spit very far?

What is your favourite superhero of all time? Why?

Well, I think it’s Dick Grayson from the DC Universe because when I was a kid I used to play with my dad that he was Batman and I was Robin. I really fell in love with that character

1 Literally ‘free wrestling’. 2 The Saint; Rodolfo Guzmán Huerta (1917-1984), a professional wrestler.3 Alejandro Muñoz Moreno (1922-2000), a professional wrestle.r.

by Diana Brahms

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for some reason. When I grew up I discovered the Teen Titans comics and I was totally crazy about them. Dick Grayson was their leader but as Nightwing. Now I’m a 19 years old adult and still love him.

What do you think makes a perfect supervillain?

Just being human, having no special abilities or superpowers but being smart enough to challenge a superhero to a battle.

Which superheroes are the most popular where you live? Do you have any of your own superheroes?

I think here in México the most popular superheroes are (like in EUA, I guess) the

Justice league, the Avengers and some of the national heroes like El chapulín Colorado, El Santo and Blue Demon.

With big movies coming one after another superheroes become more and more popular. Which characters are still not widely known

that you would like people to learn about? Who else would you like to see on big screen?

Blue Beetle from the DC comics, I really like him because he’s a teen superhero and also has Mexican blood. He’s super funny and has a nice suit.

Animal Man from the DC comics again, I think he’s one of the best heroes I know but, unfortunately, is also one of the most underrated. I’d recommend the comics to everyone! They are so well written!

Now, back to your art - what are your plans for future? Do you want to work on a more or less traditional superhero comics / animation? Do you have other projects coming first on your to do list?

As an animation student and knowing the market I’m entering, I just want to be good in my area: a good animator first, then, yeah, I’d like to work in super heroes animated films! That’s my dream.

Thank you and good luck! I hope we see more of your awesome works in the future!

El Chapulin Colorado by Juan GarciaRights acquired

Nightwing by Diana Brahms

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F riedrich Nietzsche proposed his Übermensch concept in “Thus Spoke

Zarathustra” in 1883.

“Man is a rope, tied between animal and overman - a rope over an abyss …what is great in man

is that he is a bridge and not an end,” Nietzsche wrote. This might not have been the first and definitely not the last of this idea to be heard of, but that definitely began a line of works exploring it.

Leo Tolstoy reacted with criticism of this concept in his “What is Art” (1896): “The art of our upper classes has educated people in this ideal of the over-man, — which is in reality the old ideal of Nero, Stenka Razin, Genghis Khan, Robert Macaire or Napoleon and all their accomplices, assistants, and adulators — and it supports this ideal with all its might.” Leo Tolstoy was not fond of the art putting the Übermensch on the pedestal either: “It is this supplanting of the ideal of what is right by the ideal of what is beautiful, i.e. of what is pleasant, that is the fourth consequence, and a terrible one, of the perversion of art in our society. It is fearful to think of what would befall humanity were such art to spread among the masses of the people. And it already begins to spread”. So, maybe, he would have frowned at the popularity of X-men and other superheroes. However, it leaves us at wonder of how much development this idea of Übermensch received by the hugely talented writers that it is a part of the moral orientation for the past few generations and for many more generations to come - probably invaluable in the face of genetics successful venture of enhancing human bodies (or, well,

other causes of genetic modification).

Bernard Shaw wrote a “Man and Superman” play in 1903 establishing ‘superman’ as one of the translations for the original term by Nietzsche. Shaw also tried to warn about the misuse of the concept through the speech of the Devil himself: “Beware of the pursuit of the Superhuman: it leads to an indiscriminate contempt for the Human. To a man, horses and dogs and cats are mere species, outside the moral world. Well, to the Superman, men and women are a mere species too, also outside the moral world”. Yes, please, remember Magneto and his background here, too.

In 1908 G. K. Chesterton, in “The Man Who Was Thursday” describes one of the characters: “They might have called Sunday the super-man. If any such creature be conceivable, he looked, indeed, somewhat like it, with his earth-shaking abstraction, as of a stone statue walking. He might have been called something above man, with his large plans, which were too obvious to be detected, with his large face, which was too frank to be understood”.

Or, closer to modern science fiction literature - Philip K. Dick in “The Golden Man” (1954) wrote: “We were always afraid a mutant with superior intellectual powers would come along,” Baines said reflectively. “A deeve who would be to us what we are to the great apes. Something with a bulging cranium, telepathic ability, a perfect semantic system, ultimate powers of symbolization and calculation. A development along our own path. A better human being.”

The first issue of X-men by Marvel followed shortly after and was published in September

X

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1963. The characters were created by the comics legends Stan Lee and Jack Kirby. Later on several other superhero mutant teams were added: The New Mutants, X-Factor, Excalibur, X-Force, and Generation X. Mutants are always born with superpowers, unlike mutates, who develop superpowers at other point (e.g. Hulk, Spider-Man, the Fantastic Four), which makes them the evolved version of a human, i.e. Übermensch. In DC Universe metahumans include both mutants and mutates. First metahumans of DC appeared in the Invasion #1 in 1989. Metahumans seem to be growing in importance in the DC Universe, since The Flash tv series (2014) heavily used them.

“Here I am saying that mutants are dangerous to us ordinaries, a view which

John W. Campbell, Jr. deplored. We were supposed to view them as our leaders. But I always felt uneasy as to how they would view us. I mean, maybe they wouldn’t want to lead us. Maybe from their superevolved lofty level we wouldn’t seem worth leading. Anyhow, even if they agreed to lead us, I felt uneasy as where we would wind up going. It might have something to do with buildings marked SHOWERS but which really weren’t.”

[Philip K. Dick, in story notes for “The Golden Man”, in the short story anthology The Golden Man (1980)]

Well, this is something to ponder about before marathoning X-Men again.

Xiena Ria Lin

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T he night was dark and rather chilly. Yes, the sky lay atop the world like a blanket

full of shiny holes. Yes, just a few minutes ago the landscape had been flooded with all shades of red, as if the reds had a family reunion, and that alone could have made a half-decent poet out of anybody. But Vasiliy was a poet already, so that was a good example of some wasted effort.

“Lovely, just lovely”, he said. He did appreciate the works of nature, he really did. He just wished the night wasn’t so bloody cold, that’s all.

A car! Distant lights pierced the darkness, an engine purred. It was a sound of hope. Vasiliy raised a hand and lifted his bag. As the lights came closer, the purr changed into a roar. “Nice car”, — thought Vasiliy as the vehicle drove past him at something that was really close to the speed of light.

The road fell silent again. For the third time in the last hour and a half Vasiliy entertained the idea that all drivers he saw were running from some mortal danger — like zombies on jetpacks or a bloodthirsty Monster from the days of yore. But the Monsters had been slain years ago and zombies famously snubbed any tool more complex than a torn limb of a fallen comrade, so that was highly unlikely.

Vasiliy sighed. Maybe the driver just didn’t see him? It was possible: the unexpectedly

chilly night was getting darker every minute and the stars were doing a very poor job, lazy bastards. Vasiliy looked at his hands: they were drowning in blackness.

OR maybe Penza was some kind of a mystic place where bad poets who didn’t have enough money for a train ticket come to die a beautiful and tragic death. That sounded plausible. It started to rain.

“Bloody hell.”

After two or three minutes in the shower Vas was so miserable that he almost missed the next car. In his defense, it was only natural: firstly, he preferred the other kind of shower. Secondly, that was the kind of downpour you could drown in. Penza, yay! Vasiliy was so busy trying to shield himself from the angry water (a pathetic attempt) that when the walls of black rain were suddenly pierced by two lances of light he was almost angry at the blinding lights: can’t you see I am suffering enough already?

Then he realized: the car! The car! He instantly threw his hand out. That was probably useless: even if he were a Christmas tree, the driver would have had to be an eagle to see him (admittedly, a very civilized eagle with a driver’s license. Anyway. Vas wasn’t ready to think of any more interesting metaphors in such a state).

The vehicle — the truck — stopped. Its huge

Of Monsters & Heroes & the Old Rusty Truck

Each one of them hated that the other one lived.of Grendel & Beowulf,

Beowulf

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bulk, darker than the night, loomed over Vasiliy. The headlights flickered, the engine rumbled.

The door opened with a groan. The driver, a huge man in his fifties, looked at Vasiliy intently.

“Are you going to stab me?”

This caught Vas by surprise. In his current state the only thing he could do to the man was to dampen him slightly. Okay, maybe drown him.

“Do I look like I am going to?”

“No. Not really.” The driver had a low husky voice that made Vasiliy think of scales chafing against each other.

“Should I?”

“No. Get in.”

The cabin was warm. Was there anything more to say? It was heaven. And it was dry — well, mostly dry now, but that didn’t matter. The driver handed the boy some wooly cloth — Vasiliy was too soaked to do the whole polite thing and gripped it like a child grips his mother’s hand after a lone trip in an elevator. The engine roared and the truck started to move.

“Where to?”

“What?” Vasiliy was drying himself with the enthusiasm usually found only in puppies, and silly ones at that.

“Where. To.” If the driver were a dog, he would be something big and old and grumpy. Vasiliy didn’t really know much about dogs.

“Oh. Tolyatti...”

“Tolyatti?”

“I guess.” Vasiliy would be happy just to chill

(in the warmest sense of the world) in a dry cabin for a few hours, but yeah. Tolyatti. Much better then Penza.

“You guess?” The owner of the vehicle — now Vasiliy could see that it was a truck, and an old one — was not impressed.

“Yeah.”

“Mhmmm.”

Was that a yes? Vas was at a loss here. It was a five hours trip. Should be okay.

Now considerably more dry and thus almost a completely different human being, he was able to take a good look at his saviour for the first time. Here, in the cabin, he didn’t look that big — or, for that matter, that old. Just a wiry man in his forties, maybe? So much for first impressions. The eyes, almost lost under the thick eyebrows, were following the road with the intensity you could probably use to burn holes in cheeses. that’s probably exactly how they make them, Vasiliy thought.

The truck was rocking gently, like a ship in the midst of the ocean.

“Anyway, thanks a lot for picking me up!” Vas wasn’t good at icebreakers. You couldn’t be good at everything. “I was already working on my eulogy, really. Bloody rain! So much for the forecast. «Clear sky, sunny», my ass.”

No response. Theb hitchhiker’s code obliged him to try a few more lines though.

“No, really. You came like a Hero of the eighties — just in the nick of time.” God that sounded stupid. Good job, Vas!

The driver was looking at him through slitted eyes. His eyes were vivid blue. Details! Vas prided himself on his ability to notice such things.

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“You know? Like someone from the Ural Brigade. Those bastards had a great sense of timing.”

The driver turned his gaze back to the road. But Vas wasn’t going to give up that easily.

“And tights. But timing as well. Like that one time with the missiles...”

“They didn’t.”

Vas did hope that the driver would speak at some point — nothing is worse than a monologue in a group of two — but this?

“What?”

“They didn’t have a great sense of timing. They were shit.”

“Err well...”

The driver looked at him again.

“Nothing but fucking posers. The real guys were at Leningrad.”

As a kid Vas really liked to read about the Brigade in old papers but now he wasn’t going to argue: the fish swallowed the bait. They would have a great conversation and the driver wouldn’t feel bad about taking a hiker afterwards. T’was a service to the hitchhiking community, that’s what it was.

“You mean...the...wait. I do remember. The band of Heroes with weapons, right?” Heroes of Leningrad were difficult. They entered the service way earlier, but later than the Moscow Three...

“The Lancers.”

“Yeah! Lancers. Right.”

“You’re wrong. Only the Proud Son had a weapon, a lance, and only before December the 27th, 1979. No need for a Monster-slaying lance in Afghanistan, eh? Naive.”

Vasiliy didn’t care about the mistake: he had missed that part of his modern history classes completely. Instead, he high-fived himself in his head, two times. One: he wasn’t going to spend the next few hours in the life-sapping Martian silence, which always felt like the man at the wheel was driving him to some execution chambers. Two: the driver seemed to be a real herohead! Much more interesting topic for a civilized conversation than, let’s say, the state of the present economy or «the disease of corruption». There were no Monsters in the government now, unlikely as it may have seemed — no real Monsters at least.

“You...You really know a lot about them, right?”

The driver shrugged and gestured vaguely at the back of the cab. Something that at the first glance looked like scraps of paper turned to be dozens and dozens of newspaper clippings. «Proud Son emerges victorious», «Will Leningrad Heroes Face Moscow Three at Olympics Tryouts?» «Kunar Battle: Pyrrhic Victory?», «Lancers Slay Krakens»...

“That is beautiful! No, wait, it doesn’t do it justice,” Vas shuffled through the old yellow pieces of paper. “It is a bloody treasure!”

The driver chuckled.

“No. I am serious. That would take years to collect! Fan-ta-stic. Look at this! «Gritzenko: First Woman to Slay Monster».” If Vas was an excited puppy before, now he went total gung ho. Think dog on ecstasy. “Tell me more about these guys, I am totally in the dark.”

“Not much to tell.”

“Well, like, who was your favourite Lancer?”

For a few seconds the cabin was silent — if you do not count the enthusiastic rustling of

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course: Vas was deep in the archive, for the lack of a better word.

“Kormachov brothers, Pavel and Petr.”

“Hey, not fair. I mean the favourite one. The One.”

“Petr was a Lancer only for a few months. He defected through Finland, became a Monster. So he doesn’t count. Can’t speak about Pavel without mentioning Petr though.”

Vas was staring at the driver open-mouthed.

“What. No, what. There was a Soviet Hero who became a Monster?”

The driver laughed sadly.

“Not only one. But the story of Kormachov brothers was big. The brothers were twins. Similiar in almost every detail. Grades, interests, everything. Even powers: both near immortal.”

“How could he then? I don’t understand.”

“They loved the same woman. Lena Gritzenko, the fierce weather girl. She... They say she was truly a force of nature. Used to curse the people who upset her with bad weather. Didn’t like the food you’d made? You get a week of rain.” He laughed.

“Still. It’s not a small thing: the brother who defected, Pavel...”

“Petr.”

“...Petr. The one who defected betrayed his country, his friends. His brother. Everything.”

“Hah. You don’t get it. It was a mess! Look at the clippings. What do you see?”

“Well...Heroes saving people. Defeating Monsters...”

“Yeah, right. We called them Monsters, but

they were Heroes for their people. Take Kraken — I’ve read a few years ago that the Swedish kid had a girl waiting for him. What a freak. Or take...”

“What about Sleeper? Or Sunset?”

“Well, yeah. Those were nutjobs. Sleeper... And Soviet nutjobs at that. They really were Monsters. In everything but appearance.”

“So...”

“So just like I said. It was a bloody mess. How could you know who was you friend or who was your enemy? Papers are black and white, real life isn’t.”

“Papers aren’t black and white anymore.”

“You get the point, all right? Look at it like this: there is nobody in the world closer than this person. And then he, by snatching what you want most, becomes your worst enemy. For bad or for worse Lena chose the gray-eyed one — and their life crumbled. How’s that for the world of black and white papers?”

“They aren’t...”

“If you finish that sentence, I throw you out of the truck.”

“No, thanks.”

For a few minutes the cabin was silent. The only things you could hear were the hungry rumble of the engine, the groaning of some loose bolts somewhere underneath the cabin and the music of the relentless rain.

“They fought. Brother against brother. A few times. Then in Kunar. It was the last time.”

“...What happened?”

“What always happens when a Hero fights a Monster — one has to die. Pavel killed his

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brother. Petr didn’t go down without a fight though. When the dust settled, one of the Lancers didn’t get up as well. The Smiling Bogdan. And the Proud Son was never the same... Well, it’s tough to lose a hand. It was a mistake to send the Lance back to Leningrad.”

“Bloody hell.”

“Yes it was. Certainly bloody and certainly very much like hell — or so they say. Everything went downhill from then on. Pavel retired as fast as he could, poor bastard. The Lancers fell apart — and soon nobody even cared. The country faced problems that you couldn’t solve with your gaze of flames or unbreakable skin. «The Pillars of the State» — all completely useless. Ironic, huh?”

The driver smiled with a sad smile and fell silent. Vasiliy had nothing to say: the story was too big, too loud in his head. He knew he had to find more information about the Lancers. The poem was almost ready to be born.

That night, sleeping in the cabin of an old rusty truck, he dreamed of knights fighting monsters and turning into monsters themselves — while the monsters were picking up the swords and donning shining armor.

***

The people of Tolyatti weren’t really happy to see Vasiliy: there was no welcoming ceremony, no red carpet or celebratory gunfire. Vas didn’t mind: he was accustomed to the lack of basic necessities. There weren’t many people to start with, the rain scared them away.

Vasiliy turned to the driver, who was finishing a cigarette under the cover of the cabin roof. Under the morning sun (if you can call that lazy thing that can’t disperse the rain ’the sun’) the truck looked really old and so rusty that Vas wouldn’t dare to bet on its original colours.

“Thanks. A lot. For the ride...and the story.”

The driver nodded, threw the cigarette away and closed the door. The door tried to resist — alas, it was at a disadvantage: the driver had hands (life isn’t always fair). The engine started to puff.

“Wait! Tell me your name!”

The man at the steering wheel looked Vas straight in the eye.

“You know my name, boy.”

And he drove away.

Vas really didn’t.

Fedor Kokorev

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Mother loves you

‘I will save the world today!’ She says it so proudly.

I see fire in her eyes, which can be so bright that I will go blind. As I was able to see, she made a firm decision. So, I nod and go to the cupboard. I take some cans with words written in Latin, open them and put my nose inside. Then I put herbal ingredients in a pot and add some boiling water.

‘You can’t save the world without a nice cup of tea, darling.’

‘Mom! I am serious!’ She rolls her eyes.

‘Sure, darling. How many people will help you?’ I open a fridge and take out some ham, mayo, cheese and vegetables.

‘Mmm, Ann and Jonathan definitely, maybe Sandra will join,’ she counts on her fingers.

‘And Cole?’ I wink at her.

I know that she likes him. I approve this relation, because Cole is a good boy from a lovely family. I often phone his mom and drink tea with her. She makes wonderful biscuits with peanuts.

My daughter’s face gets as red as her fiery hair. I accept her mumbling as a ‘yes’, so I take away the garlic – Cole has an allergy on it. Then I make proper sandwiches for all of them, plus seconds. I know that boys would like to get an extra portion, especially Jonathan, who has a very fast metabolism. I put sandwiches in a box with a red fox on it. I also take some apples and 5 small chocolate bars. They all go into my daughter’s backpack. As well as a thermos with my special herbal tea. It will be good for their health.

Finally, I sit down in front of my daughter and give her a cup of tea. I also move a plate with my cupcakes to her. She sits down, grabs one of them and starts chewing on it. It is really difficult to go against my will, only her father was able to do so. Maybe, if he haven’t been so stubborn, I would not be a widow now.

‘Tell me how you are going to save the world, darling.’

I sip some tea. It is perfect. Never add sugar in herbal tea – is one of my home rules.

‘Well…there is a bomb in the nuclear engine… and it is ticking. And the whole world would blow up if I don’t leave this house in five minutes!’ My daughter’s eyes glint with fury.

‘Did you take protection clothes?’

‘Jonathan has his armour, I am resistant to it. I think that Ann is sensible enough to bring her wellingtons. I don’t know about Sandra, she may be still ill. Cole… He will guide us from the distance, I guess. We really will manage, mum, don’t worry!’ She is afraid that I would not let her go.

‘Okay. Say hi to everyone from me, darling,’ I move my hand and let her go.

My pet lianas hide away, while my girl rushes into the corridor. She takes her backpack and flies away to help her friends.

I clean the kitchen and go to the living room. I switch on the TV and wait for breaking news. And yes, here they are. I see my daughter, who flies around in her golden suit and tries to get into the building. They call her “Sun fox”. Jonathan, who calls himself a ‘Black Knight’, flank the entrance door in his life-armour. A

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girl with a ‘Psionic butterfly’ name is Ann. She is blocking enemies with her abilities. I am sure that Cole is also nearby and tries to hack the nuclear station systems. Everyone is sure that D-boy will deal with this task.

What a pity, the doctor announces that Sandra - or ‘Water woman’ as they call her - is still recovering from the last mission and can’t join them. I think that she is a lovely girl, but she seems too old for other kids. I hope she will soon find friends of her age.

The kids are already in the building. I order my lianas to bring a phone. I want to call Cole’s mom and invite her for a cup of tea.

‘Lilith listens,’ a cold voice answers me. I smile.

‘Hello, this is Missis Bathory! They will crack the nuclear station soon. Lets drink some tea and make a new plan for keeping our kids busy?’

‘Hello, Liz. Okay, I will bring biscuits. See you soon. ’

Leiko

LIFE’S GRAVY

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T he office is meticulously dustless. The whole intention of the place is to bear

no dirt whatsoever. It’s the office in the end. And people come to work here. Purple/grey-checkered rugs are the best solution for depression-enhancing environment of a big firm. Obviously, you work here. Hiding your sneakers under the table, you swallow down your lunch with coffee at the table, while typing with one hand. Emails. Sigh, cough, go fill a plastic blue cup with water and come back. Sigh again, check inbox. Someone’s birthday is today. You don’t really know the person but probably have heard her name last year when she had a birthday or something, so you reply with best wishes and go get a slice of a cake. Perfect. The day didn’t go to waste when you get a cake. Reply to a client. Drink coffee. Yawn. Hide from a boss. You can’t hide, really. You sit right in front of the door to his office in the open space. You get up, look at your sneakers and march into his office, closing the door behind to get yelled at and go back to do the same work again, but differently. Normally, you wouldn’t want to read other people’s minds, but you are required to.

Plug in your headphones. You don’t want to hear anything. Not the wrecking sounds from outside. It has been going on for ages now, it is just irritating, not even scary anymore. Aliens came in 2017, killed loads of people somewhere.

You were munching on a stranger’s birthday cake. The war is still ongoing. You throw away the sticky plate. The noise has stopped and you wait for it to start again a moment later. But it has stopped. You raise your head to realize it’s past midnight and the office is almost empty. The lights are mainly off, which gives the place a cozy feel. Cozier than the place you live in anyway. You decide to grab another cup of coffee and go to a large balcony of the 28th floor. Quite a view. You fidget the mug in your hands and try to find a fire or a fight on the horizon. Nothing, it’s a calm night. You can taste the smoke on your lips but it’s fleeting away. You breath in full lungs of heavy air. Breath out.

The big city breathes out with you. It’s impossibly silent. Nothing happens for a few minutes while you wait and drink your bitter coffee. Still bitter, however much milk you put in it. Cars hustle in the hazy distance below. No one cares. Have they ever? Have you ever? Maybe at first. There are still people there, trying to win the war. Fighting, struggling. Heroes. You still work for the same company. Fear of your boss and a slice of a cake is as exciting as it gets. They are making history, not you. Sigh, make the last coffee drops fall 28 floors down to quite never reach the ground. Yawn and go back to finish your work.

Xiena Ria Lin17 July 2014

originally published on snailsarts

Making History

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***

Hey, if you want, let loose.Enjoy your life and youth.There’s never an excuse.To hide away like Bruce.

Don’t always be a planner.Live in a simple manner.Just like a gypsy vanner.(Tell this to Dr. Banner.)

And don’t you ever sulk.Please, don’t you dare to skulk.

Embrace your inner bulk.Transform into a Hulk.

Anya Kouznetsova

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Everyone’s a Superhero

We don’t need no superpowersTo safely power homes or cars,To plant both trees and flowers

And aim to reach the stars.

This is the simplest matter To have your voice heard.Without an endless chatter

Spread out important word:

Superhero is a set of mind - You make it personal concern

To save and raise the humankindWithout return or gold to earn.

Instead of that you have respect.It’s nothing close to normal fame,

But you have reasons to expectFor all of us to do the same.

Emma Blackwell

The author has asked to refer the readers to the song ‘Land of Confusion’ by Genesis, which you can find in the playlist to this issue.

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D o you ever feel like giving up? Like throwing your hands in the air and

walking away, like saying that you no longer care what happens and leaving it all for someone else to deal with? I bet you do. But how many times do you go back to what you’ve abandoned, and finish it? How many times, even when you think you can’t make it, you keep pushing yourself and succeed? I bet that happens quite often, too. Do you ever think that you might be a superhero? This, I think, is not that common.

We call ourselves smart, kind, talented, resourceful, physically fit, caring, loyal, honest, funny, what-have-you. The word ‘superhero’ usually doesn’t pop up. The question is, why? Yes, of course, Hulk is GREEN and HUGE and can destroy half a city in half a minute, Wonder Woman can FLY and is SUPER STRONG, Cyclops has LASERS for eyes, Spider-Man has, well, SPIDER POWERS, Thor is the freakin’ GOD OF THUNDER, and this list probably could go on FOREVER. But that’s not the point. What is the point, then? The fact that, apart from all those fantastic abilities, they are, more or less, human. They have emotions, fears, desires. Like all of us. Unless you’re an alien, although you could still have a lot in common with the us humans. And, yes: everyone is a superhero in their own way. I know, sounds terribly cliché. But you know what? It’s not necessarily a bad thing to say. Just hear me out. I will try to be as down to a point as possible.

You most likely know people who are kind to others, who save animals that were hit on the road, who defend the innocent, who return the phone they have found on the street to its

owner, who get coffee for you when you’re overwhelmed with work, who do it all just because they feel that this is the right thing to do. People who are selfless and want to make this world a better place, even just a little bit.

You most likely know people who’d never betray their friends, who are loyal to their partners, who are there to offer their support when you need it, who are caring and look out for their loved ones, with whom you can be honest without the fear of being judged for who you are. People you can rely on, people you trust them with your life.

You most likely know people who always keep fighting, who encourage you to do the same, who stick to their training regime, who remind you to get some rest and remember to eat, who always meet the deadline. People who don’t give up, who get up after they stumble, even if it’s getting harder and harder to keep going.

This is another list that could go on FOREVER. And it’s full of superhero traits. Traits that most people have, too. So what is stopping you from saying that you’re a superhero? You might not physically resemble Captain America, but you can be as kind and caring as he is, you might not be able to change the reality the way Scarlet Witch does, but you can love your family and be able to tell right from wrong, you might not be a genius billionaire playboy philanthropist, as Tony Stark likes to describe himself, but you can take responsibility for your actions and try to make things right.

I think that’s enough to go on with, don’t you think?

Phillip Morcom

It’s Your Time to Be a Hero

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Classifieds

FOUND: A red and golden metal arm found in the backyard in Quebec. It made quite a big hole and destroyed my tomatoes. Looks expensive and important. Will return for a considerable compensation. Contact at [email protected]

WANTEDA purple being carrying old-fashioned weaponry, you were at the Restaurant at the End of the Universe last Friday, your date didn’t show up. I wish I had taken their place back then, you’re super sexy. Please call. +8064386377.

A person with teleportation powers able to carry one to three people to any point on the planet. Should look presentable for official meetings. Work for a big financial company. No agencies, please. [email protected]

Looking for someone to mend my broken heart. I can blow things so they explode. You have a sweet southern accent. We should be able to touch skin to skin. [email protected]

A worthy man to carry around my hammer while I’m not feeling like it. Call xxxx out loud to contact me directly.

FOR HIREFLY-MAN - will annoy you, sit on all your fruits and eat your sugar DAILY for only $99.99 per week! [email protected]

I am the sidekick you were looking for! Reliable, loyal, minding my own unheroic unfamous business while helping you fight/commit crimes. Can also do your taxes. [email protected]

FOR SALE:Secondhand brown&yellow costume. Well worn. Doesn’t fit any more. XXXX-XXX-XXXX

Serum to make your muscles grow! Non-reversible. Possible side effects include anger and loss of hair on chest, back and legs. XXX-XXXX-XXXX

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MailDear Life’s Gravy!

I have been waiting for the superheroes issue for a while now! I still remember the last issue dedicated to Superman and Batman fighting or something. It wasn’t that good, so I don’t have high hopes this time. Nevertheless, it’s just great to see you pick cool topics. Rock on!

- Steve

Hello Steve!

Thank you for your sweet letter. I hope you like this issue as we decided to go in a slightly different direction here, as you can see. We appreciate your criticism of our past mistakes, never again.

Yours, XRL

Hi! I’d like to suggest a song to the playlist for SUPERHEROES. I know you will probably pick other more conventional songs on the topic, but I’d really like to see “Land of confusion” by Genesis in it! It has a Superman reference, but it also is kind of about the need for superheroes in our world and it makes me feel like I could be one, too. Thanks!

- Lana

Hello Lana!

Thank you for the suggestion! It’s a really good song, I am a huge fan of Peter Gabriel. He has a song called ‘Heroes’, which you might like, too. Actually, we decided that “Land of confusion” will be a perfect ending of our playlist. Emma Blackwell, one of our authors - for this issue she wrote a poem ‘Everyone’s a superhero’, said she wanted this song to be associated with the poem, which we noted.

Thanks once again,XRL

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Editor’s Picks

1. Awolination - Kill Your Heroes

2. The Cure - Lullaby

3. The Kinks - Johnny Thunder

4. Chad Kroeger - Hero

5. 3 Doors Down - Kryptonite

6. Lazlo Bane - I’m No Superman

7. Bonnie Tyler - I Need a Hero

8. Smash Mouth - Everyday Superhero

9. Tim McMorris - Superhero

10. BIGkids - Superhero

11. David Guetta - Titanium

12. Marvin Gaye - Ain’t No Mountain High Enough

13. The Wombats - Your Body is a Weapon

14. Phillip Phillips – Fly

15. REM - Superman

16. Genesis - Land of Confusion

You can listen to this playlist at our vk page (for registered users).

1. Scott Pilgrim vs The World (this ultimately geeky Canadian piece can never be overrated)

2. Defendor (a fantastic take on what it means to be a superhero)

3. Green Hornet (not to be confused with Green Lantern of the same year - this is a comedy of other sorts with a hilarious duo and a supercar)

4. Inspector Gadget (this goofy family comedy totally qualifies! I used to want to be like the main character and I wouldn’t say I gave up on that dream after I grew up)

5. Hellboy I & II (the talents of Guillermo Del Toro and Mike Mignola mix to create a multilayered colourful tribute to the world of HP Lovecraft)

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Thank you all for your support in making of this issue. I am very happy to know that people are reading and, hopefully, enjoying our zine (savoring their time!).

You can find us online:

• facebook (https://www.facebook.com/lifesgravy);

• vkontakte (https://vk.com/lifesgravy);

• tumblr (http://lifesgravy.tumblr.com/).

If you like what you read, you may consider donations:

I would be delighted to receive your comments! Also, we are constantly looking to expand our family of contributors and friends - so submit your art, writings, suggest a song for the playlist, drop us a message or write a letter/classifieds to be published in the next issue of Life’s Gravy. I would presume you agree for us to publish whatever you send me, unless you state otherwise. If you have suggestions on how to improve our work here or feel you would like to be involved in this madness and are able to do that, feel free to contact me as well. Just fyi - we are open to cross-promotion! Please send everything to [email protected] *grabby hands*

The next issue of Life’s Gravy is planned for the July 15, 2015, and dedicated to TIME TRAVEL.

Closing Word

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