Lesson 13 – Family Conflict and Crises Robert Wonser.
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Transcript of Lesson 13 – Family Conflict and Crises Robert Wonser.
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Lesson 13 – Family Conflict and Crises
Robert Wonser
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Family Conflict and Crises
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Conflict
What do you think of when you hear the word conflict?
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What family environment is best for children?
Some conflict is inevitable and healthyHow conflict is handled is criticalPositive and calm family environment makes children feel . . . safe and secureloved and wanted
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How are Children Affected by Conflict?
When parents fight, children feelStressedAnxious and may withdrawSelf-blamefight is about themthey try to make peace and fail
Children of violent HH tend to grow up to be perpetrators or victims
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Intrapsychic/Personal Causes of Conflict
Originate within the individual Inner drives, instincts, values pull against each other
These conflicts come from family of origin issues and early childhood
Can be: Unrealistic fears and anxietiesNeurotic needsEmotional illnessDepressionMood swings
Solution = resolve personal issues first, then relationship
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Intrasomatic/Physical Causes of Conflict
FatigueHungerOverworkHeadachesLow blood sugarMedicationsCause conflict because they result in:
irritability impatiencedistorted reasoning low tolerance for frustration
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Interpsychic/Interpersonal Causes of Conflict
Based in intimate interactions
Caused byMisunderstandingEmotional withdrawalMiscommunicationDifficulty resolving differences
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Situational/EnvironmentalCauses of Conflict
Living conditions in householdSocietal or cultural strainsUnexpected eventsSituations can trigger personal or interpersonal sources of conflict
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Crises
Drastic change in course of eventsCan be good or bad change
Turning point that changes the future
Externalfloods, fires, war
Internaldivorce, alcoholism, loss of family member, family violence
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Process of Adjustment
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How people cope with crises
SpiritualityFamily supportSense of humor
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Violence
The intentional use of physical or symbolic force by an individual aimed at hurting or injuring another person.
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Family Violence
Affects every class, ethnicity, age, sexual orientation
May or may not = physical injuryMaintain controlSociety legitimizes some violence:
SpankingVideo games / movies / war
Societal norms changing
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Family Violence and Abuse
Under reported in the US 10-18% of adults experience abuse from their
partnersFBI, Bureau of Justice and other agencies report 1
million rapes, assaults, and robberies occur among partners each year85% female victims
1/3 of those 30 and under have experienced dating violence
2002-33% of ♀ murder victims were murdered by a current or former intimate partner (CFIP) (4% ♂ were)
1 in 12 ♀ will be stalked in her lifetime
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Family Violence and Abuse, continued
34% ♀ were sexually coerced by CFIPNative American ♀ have the highest likelihood of rape
and the offender is most likely to be a strangerYoung black ♀ have the highest rates of CFIP violence#1 killer of black ♀ 15-34 years is homicide by CFIP3-10 million kids witness domestic violence annually
Costsmedical costsdamaged property lost wages
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Verbal abuse
Words that cause mental or psychological distressshamingthreateningswearingbelittlinghumiliationexcessive jealousy or possessiveness
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Physical abuse
Causes physical distress to a personhittingkickingthe use of objects to hurt another person
rapeother forced or coerced sexual activities
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Non-verbal abuse
Use of symbolic forceslamming a doordestroying an object/property of anothertearing up a photographsilencesulking isolationeconomic deprivation
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Neglect
not providing food to dependentsnot providing medical care
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Factors that contribute to violence in relationships
cultural valuesgender rolesfamily history of violencedrug and alcohol abusedependencyjealousy, possessiveness, and suspicionneed to controlunhappiness and dissatisfactionanger and aggressiveness
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Why Women StayWhy Women StayAbuse starts insidiously and graduallyAbuse starts insidiously and graduallyChildhood history of abuse Childhood history of abuse CommitmentCommitmentUnderestimate the degree of dangerUnderestimate the degree of dangerFearFearAccept blame=think she can stop itAccept blame=think she can stop itEmotional dependency/low self-esteemEmotional dependency/low self-esteemGuiltGuiltLegitimateLegitimateLove himLove him
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Effects of Child Abuse
More aggressiveBehaves negativelyDoesn’t get along well with othersDoes poorly in schoolPoor problem solvingLong-term adjustment problems
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Abuse is LESS likely in families where
spouses have an egalitarian relationshipthey share equal decision-making power in
regard to finances, purchases, vacations, etc.the marriage is monogamousnormal disagreements are resolved
peacefullythere is outside support for the abused and
the abused seeks it after the first incident
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Elder abuse is MORE likely when…
The elder abused the adult child as a childThe elder has decreased functioningThe abuser may not understand the
disabilityThe abusive adult child may use drugs or
alcohol
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Stages of Dying and GriefElisabeth Kubler-Ross
Denial or shockAngerBargaining DepressionAcceptance