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JULY 2017 FEAR NOT

Building

Confidence

MORNING PRAYERS

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DINNERTIME STORIES

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DRIVE-TIME GAMES

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BEDTIME QUESTIONS

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WEEKLY BIBLE STORY & MEMORY VERSE

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INTRODUCTIONPAGES 3-4

FEAR NOT

Building

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Dr. Josh + Christi

In a Christianity Today article earlier this year titled, “Why Are Our Children so Anxious?,” my friend, licensed Christian counselor Sissy Goff wrote, “When I first started counseling 24 years ago, probably one out of every 20 kids… were dealing with anxiety. Now… I would say at least 16 of every 20 families are here for that reason, if not more.”

Many equate the increased anxiety to overstimulation in today’s society. Whether it’s the latest news cycle, a packed family schedule, pressure to perform or—likely the worst culprit of all—screens, our hearts and minds remain unsettled. The article goes on to explain the trickle-down effect of anxiety from parents to children. This is why “the way of the teacher” matters.

For the month of July, we focus on helping our kids “fear not.” But even more than that, we show them “the way” of peace—which is the opposite of fear (Phil. 4:6-7). A lifelong journey for each of us, no doubt, a “peace of mind” comes, not from self-confidence, but from God-confidence.

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FOR COUPLES Spend just 10 minutes after the kids are in bed talking about a fear you have with your spouse that you might not have shared before. Don’t try to fix each other’s fear, or even minimize or ridicule the fears. Just listen to each other. Talk about ways you can, in thanksgiving, give these fears to God together, but also how you can help each other take the power out of the fear this month.

FOR MOMAs if our kids’ worries alone weren’t enough, what about ours, as moms? If you’re anything like me (Christi), you worry about your kids. As you spend time this month praying for and with them, consider your own heart too. So often, our own fears come out in how we react to our kids—and even our spouse. When I find myself yelling, being short with, or otherwise snappy with my loved ones, it forces me to evaluate what’s going on in my own heart. As Josh mentioned in the video from a few days ago, we cannot think straight when we’re overwhelmed.

What one worry or fear are you having a difficult time giving to God in prayer? Write it down. How is it preventing you from thinking about things that are true, noble, pure, excellent, and praiseworthy? Remember, peace that surpasses all understanding comes not from anything we can do, but only by what He has already done for us. Read and meditate on Matthew 6:25-34 throughout this month. Make a list of worries—no matter how big or small—you need to surrender in prayer. Remember, God’s got it.

FOR DADI (Josh) don’t know about you, but I worry. I worry about work. Finances. Schedules. Deadlines. Retirement. College funds. Did I mention finances? So what do I do? I work. I also gain affirmation by what I do—so naturally, I keep doing it. The problem with this kind of living is that our identity gets wrapped up in what we do, not who we are. In other words, we’re only as good as our last dance. And when you’re only that good, you worry about how to keep up.

Yet, when the disciples came back from carrying out the works of the Lord, Jesus told them not to focus on what they did, but that their names were written in heaven (Luke 10:20). To find peace, as a dad, try to work not from anxiety, but from the peace of knowing you are a son of God. This month, start celebrating the work you accomplished. Celebrate with your family by scheduling uninterrupted one-on-one time with your spouse and kids—phone and distractions out of sight. The only rule is to be “all there” and have fun. The work will be there when you get back. Take an inventory to see how this one-on-one time has influenced your kid’s behavior throughout the month.

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Father, rally Your angels to strengthen my children’s confidence in You, especially

when they’re afraid.

Lord, help my children to learn to trust You with their fears.

God, no matter what my children face, help them to remain steadfast on the narrow road,

turning to You in all circumstances.

Lord, even in the face of ridicule or opposition, give my children the call and resolve to serve Christ, and remove from them the striving to

please people.

Father, help my children, in humility, to honor You with their talents, giving You praise for all

they accomplish.

Father, fill my kids’ hearts and minds with Your peace when they’re anxious.

Father, instill deeply in the hearts of my children how worthy and loved they are by

You—that You care for them even more than the birds of the air.

We suggest you pray the following prayers for your kids throughout this month as they wake, and even ask them to pray the prayer for themselves as well. Simply change the

respective pronouns from “my children” for the parent, to “me” for the child

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MORNING PRAYERS

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Father, help my children learn to trust that You will never leave them or forsake them.

Father, help my kids to fear You and learn to pray for wisdom, insight, and knowledge.

Lord, teach my children not to worry about tomorrow but to rely on You for what they

need today.

God, thank You for being our refuge and strength, our helper who is always with us in

times of trouble.

Father, give my children confidence in You as a child of God to accomplish a task, face

a fear, step out of their comfort zone, or lend a helping hand to someone in need

this week.

Lord, ground my child’s confidence and peace in being a son / daughter of God.

Father, instill in my children this confidence, “That he who started a good work in [them] will carry it on to completion until the day of

Christ Jesus.”

God, help me to trust You, so that I may model for my kids how to trust You.

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Each month we provide a list of games related to that month’s mile-marker. Simply choose the ones you enjoy as a family and play them often.

BUILDING CONFIDENCE

When we worry, it certainly doesn’t feel like “God’s got it.” This is a drive-time game that helps our children learn to relax and begin giving their fears to God from an early age. The idea behind the game is for our kids to learn this one truth, that God’s got it.

You know your children. Sometimes, you can easily sense when something is worrying them. Simply begin by asking your kids to name one thing they’re afraid of. You could ask this question in a number of ways depending on the age / maturity of your children. “What is one thing you’re not looking forward to this week?” “Is there an event / situation coming up you’re anxious about?” You could even break the ice by beginning the game.

The point of this game is to help your kids learn to automatically refer to this game to relax when they’re feeling fearful or alone:

1 Have your child specifically verbalize his / her fear. (This alone reduces anxiety.)

2 Everybody, together in the car—except the driver!—closes their eyes and takes slow deep breaths.

3 Teach your children to picture their lungs as balloons filled with air. As they slowly “release the fear,” picture the Holy Spirit replacing it with peace.

4 Once the person who shared feels more at peace, he begins counting backwards aloud from 3, 2, 1, and everybody yells together, “God’s got it!” as they open their eyes.

DRIVE-TIME GAMES

God’s Got It

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BUILDING CONFIDENCE

When we feel like we have some control over a situation, it reduces anxiety. While you’re driving, have your children name one fear. For example, if he says that he’s afraid of a shadow monster, put him—figuratively speaking, of course—in the driver’s seat. Find a plate or something you could use as a steering wheel that he can hold while he comes up with a plan to regain power in the situation. Next, ask, “What can you do to feel safer?” Help him come up with reasonable solutions. When you arrive home, everyone pitch in to give him the power he needs. For example, he now has a laser sword (i.e. flashlight) next to his bed so he can laser the shadow monster whenever he’s scared.

Kids fear all sorts of things. The dark. A monster under their bed. The shadow on the wall. The bully at school. Thunderstorms. Being alone. Going to school. Not making the team. Being rejected by friends. Too often, our kids walk around with these fears, unable to verbalize them. Have your kids use their imagination to dream about how they want a scenario they fear to play out. Instead of being scared of the monster in their closet, the bully at school, or the bear outside the tent (if you’re camping this month), help them devise a scheme where a super hero comes to the rescue. It could be Jesus, an angel, or even themselves. Everybody take turns helping each other come up with a dream story to conquer their fears.

Just allow your kids to talk about and imagine their dream scenario for how it could be resolved. This reduces anxiety, fosters creativity, and makes the drive time go faster. Everybody take a turn. When we face our fears together, even the fear of being alone, diminishes.

The point of this game is simple: to teach the value of prayer. Use drive time to each talk about one person you know who needs prayer today. Spend your drive praying for others.

Let Me Drive!

Pray

DRIVE-TIME GAMES

The Dream You Imagine

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Use the dinner table this month to talk about your family values. As you put together your family’s list of top values, invite your children into the discussion. Talk about each value individually and what they mean to each of you. For instance, you can ask the following questions as prompts:

BUILDING CONFIDENCE

DINNERTIME STORIES

Tell your kids about an obstacle you had to overcome today. How did you get through it?

Tell your children about how your confidence in God grew because of a trial you experienced.

Talk about one obstacle you have coming up this week and how you plan to overcome it.

Tell your kids about one of the boldest prayers you ever prayed and how God answered it.

Talk tonight about a time when you worried about something way more than you needed to. What was the outcome? Depending on the age of your children, talk to them about how you could have better prepared yourself.

Tell your children about something you were scared of growing up. How did you overcome that fear?

Talk to your children about a moment God showed you how much He loves you.

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BUILDING CONFIDENCE

DINNERTIME STORIES

This one will require a little research, but read or tell a story of a person who walked in confidence in the face of fear and how they relied on God to do so. This could be someone like Martin Luther King Jr., Chesley Sullenberger, Rosa Parks, or Eric Liddell. Or it could be a Bible character like Abraham or even Esther.

Talk to your children about a spiritual discipline that helps you build your confidence in God (i.e. walking in the woods, quiet time, reading the Bible, worship, confession, etc.).

Tell your children about one practical way you manage anxiety. Especially when you’re immediately overwhelmed, caught off-guard, or facing danger of some kind.

Talk about a moment you placed confidence in the Lord, even though you were scared (i.e. standing up to a bully, giving a speech, singing in front of a crowd, playing a sport, etc.).

Tell your children what was going on the day they were born. Connect this story to Psalm 139:13-18. Read it aloud to your children. Teach them that God created them and their story. Help them to understand that God is always thinking of them (v. 18)!

Tell your children what it means for you to say that you are a child of God. How does it change the way you approach your day? Ask your children what they think it means for them. Help your child affirm confidence in their relationship with God.

Everyone share the highlight of his or her day.

What one prayer request does each person have for the week ahead?

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BUILDING CONFIDENCE

BEDTIME QUESTIONS

Of all of the current events happening in the world, what are you most fearful of?

01What was the most difficult thing you had to deal with today / this week? How did you get through it?

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Name one thing that happened this week that you’re incredibly grateful for.

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If you could ask God one question, what would it be?06

Is there anything that scared you today or that you’re afraid might happen?

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Give me an example of when you put your faith in God and He came through for you.

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When you get scared, what are ways you calm yourself down?12

What is one way you want to begin building more confidence in Jesus? How can I help you do that?

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When did you feel most alone today?03

What are the some of the things you’re worried people might be thinking about you?

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When do you feel most at peace? 07

Share one thing you know now that you didn’t know when you woke up this morning.

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Tell me a prayer God answered for you. How long did it take for Him to answer it?

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If you could have one superpower, what would it be? Why?13

When do you feel most confident? 15

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WEEKLY BIBLE STORY & MEMORY VERSE

BUILDING CONFIDENCE

WEEK 1 Judges 6:12-16, 23

The Story of Gideon

WEEK 2 Mark 4:35-41

Jesus Calms the Storm

WEEK 3 Matthew 6:25-34

Jesus’ Sermon on Fear

WEEK 4 Daniel 3:8-30

The Furnace of Blazing Fire

Memory verse: Psalm 46:1 “God is our refuge and strength, a helper who is always found in times of trouble.”

Memory verse: Philippians 4:6 “Don’t worry about anything, but in everything, through prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”

Memory verse: Matthew 6:33 “But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be provided for you.”

Memory verse: Joshua 1:9b “Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

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