Issue%No.%11%Autumn%2012% - Swindon Sands · Swindon%Sands%% Autumn%Newsletter%2012% 4!...
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1 Issue No. 11 Autumn 2012
Transcript of Issue%No.%11%Autumn%2012% - Swindon Sands · Swindon%Sands%% Autumn%Newsletter%2012% 4!...
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Issue%No.%11%Autumn%2012%
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Swindon%Sands%% Autumn%Newsletter%2012%
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Welcome%to%Our%Autumn%Newsletter%
Footprints%Walk%%June!was!National!Sands!Awareness!month!and!as!part!of!this!we!held!a!Footprints!Walk.!This!was!the!brilliant!idea!of!Roxanne!Sawyer!in!memory!
of!her!little!boy!Rhys.!!On!23rd!June!around!30!members!of!the!group!and!
family!and!friends!braved!the!rain!to!walk!around!Coate!Water!Park.!This!
was!a!wonderful!group!effort,!it!was!good!for!everyone!to!come!together!
and!wearing!Sands!tJshirts!and!balloons!we!raised!awareness!of!the!group.!!
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There!were!quite!a!few!people!who!came!up!to!the!group!to!ask!what!it!was!
for,!several!who!had!
lost!babies!and!didn’t!
know!we!existed.!So!
whilst!it!is!always!
heartbreaking!to!
learn!of!little!babies!
being!lost,!it!is!good!
that!new!people!can!
benefit!from!the!
support!and!
friendship!of!the!
group.!
We!would!like!to!offer!a!huge!welcome!to!those!that!have!recently!joined!
Swindon!Sands!and!we!are!sorry!that!you!have!had!to!start!this!journey,!but!
please!know!that!you!are!not!on!your!own.!We!all!have!our!own!stories!to!
share!and!challenges!to!face!so!I!hope!we!can!help!each!other!and!lift!each!
other!along!the!way.!!
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This!month!we!are!able!to!include!a!number!of!personal!stories,!thank!you!
to!the!brave!Mummy’s!and!Daddy’s!who!have!been!able!to!share!what!
happened,!I!know!your!little!ones!are!very!proud.!
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Whether!you!are!recently!bereaved!or!lost!some!time!ago!our!thoughts!are!
with!you!and!there!will!always!be!someone!with!a!listening!ear!and!a!
shoulder!to!cry!on.!!
With!love,!Cathy,!Group!Chair!
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Swindon%Sands%% Autumn%Newsletter%2012%
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%Iron(ing)%Man%By#James#Radford,#Daddy#to#Harvey#!
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James!Radford’s!family!and!friends!have!raised!
£400!for!Sands!with!him!completing!the!UK!
Ironman!Triathlon!in!July.!The!triathlon!is!a!
2.4!mile!swim,!112!mile!bike!ride!and!26!mile!
run!in!Bolton!(not!the!Hawaii!version).!It!took!
James!12!hours!56!minutes!and!lots!of!sugar!
boosts!to!get!round.!This!is!to!be!added!to!the!
£2200!raised!in!2010!with!James!running!the!
Marathon!Des!Sables!in!the!Sahara!desert.!!
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James!was!running!in!memory!of!his!Son!
Harvey!and!would!like!to!say!thank!you!to!all!
for!their!support!including!Arlene,!his!wife!
and!Harvey’s!Mum,!and!James’!own!Mum!who!
took!the!only!photo!on!the!day!!James!is!now!focused!on!
his!next!challenge,!‘Ironing!Man’!to!make!up!for!not!doing!any!household!
chores!over!the!last!6!months!!
One!of!our!big!projects!this!year!!
Hollie’s%Sky%Dive%By#Hollie#Windslow,#Mummy#to#Shaylan#
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On!Aug!11th!it!was!my!Son’s!1st!birthday!in!
heaven,!a!huge!milestone!for!me!and!I!wanted!
to!do!something!to!mark!the!year.!So!I!decided!
to!do!a!skydive!in!his!memory!and!raise!
money!for!Sands.!It!was!my!way!also!to!give!
something!back!to!Sands,!after!they!have!been!
a!lifeline!to!me!since!losing!Shaylan.!The!
whole!experience!was!amazing,!I!felt!so!proud!
I!was!doing!it!all!for!him,!floating!in!the!sky!
(after!the!parachute!was!released!)!gave!me!
that!feeling!of!being!even!closer!to!him!!I!
raised!a!total!of!£900!in!Shaylan’s!memory!J!I!
had!so!much!love!and!support!from!everyone.!
It!was!a!day!to!remember.!!
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Swindon%Sands%% Autumn%Newsletter%2012%
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Graham’s%London%Marathon%ll%
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By#Graham#Mansell,#Daddy#to#Toby#!
I've!been!asked!to!write!something!about!my!
experience!of!losing!my!son!Toby!and!my!
eventual!response!of!running!London!marathon!
in!his!memory.!I!now!realise!that!the!process!of!
healing!after!Toby's!death!will!last!until!my!last!
breath.!Yet,!nearly!two!and!a!half!years!after!
Toby!died,!I!am!better!able!to!cope!with!life!again!
than!I!imagined!I!would!be.!I've!no!doubt!that!I!
owe!some!of!that!to!the!therapeutic!aid!of!
exercise!and!the!personal!satisfaction!of!doing!
something!as!incredible!(for!me!at!least)!as!
running!a!marathon!for!Toby.!
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Toby!was!born!prematurely!on!the!12th!March!2010,!he!had!previously!been!
diagnosed!with!a!diaphragmatic!hernia,!a!life!threatening!condition!that!
turned!our!world!upside!down.!When!I!first!saw!him!was!the!moment!that!I!
truly!knew!how!much!I!loved!him!and!how!much!it!would!hurt!to!lose!him.!!
He!survived!only!until!the!14th!March,!which!by!some!cruel!twist!of!fate!was!
Mother’s!Day.!!Toby’s!death!was!almost!unbearable!and!the!days,!weeks!and!
months!that!followed!have!been!the!darkest!of!my!life.!Something!inside!me!
has!driven!me!to!survive!this.!I!feel!that!Toby,!wherever!he!is,!looks!down!on!
me!and!can!see!and!feel!all!of!my!pain!and!it!breaks!his!heart.!I!don’t!want!
him!to!think!he!has!destroyed!the!life!that!his!parents!had,!so!I!continue!to!
aspire!for!happiness,!no!matter!how!futile!it!feels!at!times.!
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I’ve!never!been!a!runner,!but!running!became!one!of!my!survival!
techniques.!The!more!I!ran!the!more!I!began!to!feel!like!it!was!my!special!
time!with!Toby.!I!started!to!think!I!could!do!something!more,!turn!the!
running!into!something!positive!in!memory!of!Toby.!With!the!support!of!
Sands!I!secured!a!place!to!run!in!the!2012!London!Marathon.!With!all!that!
had!happened!in!our!lives!I!found!it!incredibly!hard!to!train!for!something!
that!was!such!a!vast!challenge!for!me.!Despite!my!inadequate!training!I!
always!knew!that!Toby!would!get!me!across!the!finish!line.!I!was!unable!to!
find!the!time!to!run!further!than!12!miles!during!my!training,!so!the!
marathon!was!always!going!to!come!down!to!shear!will!and!determination.!!!
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Swindon%Sands%% Autumn%Newsletter%2012%
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Colours%of%Autumn%Ball%ll%
Memorial%Garden%
Our!very!own!Swindon!Sands!memorial!garden!is!currently!thriving,!so!
much!so!that!this!month!our!front!cover!is!a!photo!taken!of!flowers!in!the!
garden’s!beds.!It!is!a!beautiful!place!to!go!to!remember!our!loved!ones!and!is!
testament!to!all!the!hard!work!and!effort!that!has!been!put!into!it!by!our!
groups!members,!family!and!friends.!If!you!haven’t!yet!laid!a!pebble!or!
planted!something!in!the!memorial!border!then!it’s!never!too!late!to!do!so.!
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It’s!hard!to!believe!that!nearly!a!year!has!passed!since!we!officially!opened!
the!memorial!garden,!in!honour!of!this!on!Sat!13th!Oct!at!10am!we!will!be!
holding!a!remembrance!service.!There!will!be!a!short!memorial!service!and!
balloon!release!in!memory!of!our!beautiful!babies.!We!hope!to!see!you!there!
on!what!is!sure!to!be!a!memorable!and!emotional!occasion.!
In!just!over!a!month,!our!3rd!annual!ball!will!be!upon!us.!Remembering!all!
of!our!little!ones!is!a!key!part!of!the!evening,!with!our!updated!Swindon!
Sands!film!being!shown.!Our!group’s!remembrance!tree!will!hold!prime!
position,!having!personalised!wooden!leaves!in!memory!of!our!little!ones.!If!
you!are!unable!to!join!us!at!the!ball,!you!are!able!to!personalise!your!leaf!at!
September’s!Support!Meeting!and!it!will!be!placed!on!the!tree!for!you.!!Each!
place!setting!will!also!have!an!individual!candle!that!can!be!lit!during!the!
evening!to!shine!brightly!for!our!babies.!!!
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We!have!some!fantastic!raffle!prizes!and!auction!items!which!will!shortly!be!
listed!on!the!Swindon!Sands!website!and!Facebook!page.!!Anyone!wanting!
raffle!tickets!to!buy!or!sell!onto!friends,!or!that!would!like!a!wooden!leaf!to!
personalise!and!is!unable!to!make!Septembers!support!meeting!please!
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On!the!day!of!the!marathon!I!was!able!to!hobble!across!the!finish!line!in!6!
hours!37!minutes!and!14!seconds.!It!was!the!second!most!physically!painful!
experience!of!my!life,!leaving!me!virtually!crippled!and!unable!to!walk!
properly!for!nearly!two!weeks!afterwards.!However,!I!did!it!for!Toby!and!
would!happily!do!it!all!over!again.!With!the!help!of!some!friends!I!was!able!
to!raise!£2273.75!for!Sands!in!memory!of!Toby.!In!some!small!way!I’m!able!
to!feel!that!Toby’s!death!was!not!entirely!in!vain.!I’ll!happily!take!that!over!
the!darkness!that!threatened!to!consume!my!life.!
You#can#read#the#full#version#of#Graham’s#story#on#the#Swindon#Sands#website.##!
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Swindon%Sands%% Autumn%Newsletter%2012%
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70’s%Fundraising%Night%ll%By#Teresa#and#James#Steele,#Mummy#and#Daddy#to#Monica#Grace#!
On!March!29th!2010!myself!and!my!Husband!James!went!to!see!our!
midwife!for!a!routine!appointment.!After!the!midwife!had!took!a!blood!
pressure!reading!and!checked!my!urine!she!had!a!very!worried!look!on!her!
face!and!told!us!we!needed!to!get!to!GWH!in!Swindon!ASAP.!On!arriving!at!
GWH!we!went!straight!to!day!assessment!and!it!was!then!we!found!out!that!
I!had!severe!preJeclampsia.!It!was!two!hours!later!that!I!received!a!Doppler!
scan!and!during!the!scan!the!sonographer!left!the!room!briefly,!on!her!
return!she!came!back!with!the!consultant!and!the!midwife!who!then!broke!
the!devastating!news!to!us!that!our!baby!had!died.!!
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My!life!was!also!then!in!the!balance!as!my!blood!pressure!had!gone!even!
higher.!I!was!then!on!the!verge!of!going!into!full!blown!eclampsia.!They!
then!had!to!stabilise!me,!which!took!a!couple!of!days,!in!the!mean!time!they!
started!the!induction!process!for!me!to!deliver!our!baby.!Our!beautiful!
daughter!Monica!Grace!was!stillborn!on!Wednesday!31st!March.!During!our!
loss!we!were!given!a!memory!box!from!Swindon!Sands.!This!memory!box!
means!more!to!us!than!words!can!ever!explain.!This!made!us!determined!to!
raise!awareness!and!funds!for!Swindon!Sands!to!help!other!parents!going!
through!the!same!situation.!! We!are!both!members!of!the!Moonrakers!MCC!motorcycle!club!and!due!to!
our!proposals!the!club!have!been!able!to!secure!two!donations!to!Swindon!
Sands.!The!loss!of!our!daughter!devastated!us,!our!family!and!friends.!My!
Father!had!his!60th!birthday!on!the!26th!June!this!year.!We!arranged!a!60th!
birthday!party!70's!themed!
disco!for!him!at!the!Wyvern!
club!in!Devizes.!My!father!
decided!that!he!did!not!
wish!to!receive!cards!or!
presents!and!instead!
requested!donations!to!
Swindon!Sands.!Thanks!to!
the!generosity!of!family!
and!friends!we!were!able!
to!raise!another!£950!for!
the!group.!
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Swindon%Sands%% Autumn%Newsletter%2012%
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Xmas%Memorial%Service%
Xmas%Bazaar%
Christmas!is!always!a!very!difficult!time!of!year!and!we!are!always!here!to!
support!each!other.!This!years!memorial!service!will!be!held!on!the!7th!Dec!
at!St!Michaels!Church.!This!is!sure!to!be!a!lovely!way!to!remember!our!
babies,!with!readings,!music!and!reflection!times.!This!is!likely!to!start!at!
7pm!but!please!check!our!website!and!facebook!page!for!more!details.!
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On!Sat!8th!Dec!we!will!be!holding!a!fundraising!and!awareness!event!at!
Highworth!Town!Council!Offices.!This!was!a!well!attended!event!last!year!
and!we!hope!to!raise!even!more!money!this!year.!There!will!be!many!stalls,!
including!a!tombola,!raffle,!bricJaJbrac,!and!we!will!be!selling!many!local!
crafts!such!as!candles!and!wreaths.!If!you!have!anything!that!you!would!like!
to!donate!or!if!you!are!a!budding!crafter!then!please!let!us!know.!!
Memorial%Poem%Don’t!cry!mummy!I!am!ok,!you!see!
I!am!somewhere!where!I!can!be!happy!and!free!
I!play!with!the!other!girls!and!boys!
We!have!lovely!things,!such!wonderful!toys!
!
I!come!to!visit!you!every!night!
I!am!holding!your!hand!with!all!my!might!
I!lie!next!to!you,!I!stroke!your!hair!
Because!I!want!you!to!know!that!I!am!there!
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I!love!you!and!daddy!ever!so!much!
I!hope!you!can!feel!my!warm!gentle!touch!
I!sit!with!you!when!it’s!a!hard!day!for!you!
But!I!am!ok,!I’m!happy,!it’s!true!
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So!try!your!best!not!to!be!sad!
And!please!tell!the!same!to!my!wonderful!dad!
I!love!you!so!much,!I’ll!be!there!tonight!
I!will!sleep!on!your!pillow,!hugging!you!tight!
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For#Isobel#Chloe#Driver,#19/09/10##J#love#Mummy,#Daddy,#and#Poppy#
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Swindon%Sands%% Autumn%Newsletter%2012%
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!!
Contact%Details%Support'Line:'01793'238788'
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If!you!try!and!call!and!get!no!response!please!leave!a!message!and!
someone!will!get!in!touch!as!soon!as!possible!
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General!Enquiries:[email protected]!
Support!after!loss:[email protected]!
Fundraising:[email protected]!
Next!edition!out!in!December!!
Important%Dates%for%Your%Diary%
On!Sat!29th!Sept!at!Northview!Community!Centre,!Highworth!we!will!be!
holding!a!sponsored!bike/trike/scooter!(in!fact!any!children’s!mode!of!
transport)!ride!!This!will!be!a!perfect!event!for!brothers!and!sisters!to!get!
involved!too!and!raise!money!in!memory!of!their!siblings.!!
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[email protected]!if!you!would!like!to!come!and!
would!like!a!sponsorship!form.!
15th!Sep! ! Garden!Workday,!10amJ2pm,!Kingsdown!Crematorium!
16th!Sep! ! GWH!Memorial!Service,!3pm,!Holy!Rood!Church!
25th!Sep! ! Support!Meeting,!7J9.30pm,!Broadgreen!Community!Centre!
29th!Sep! ! Sponsored!Tots!Ride,!2pm,!Northview!Community!Centre!
30th!Sep! ! Pub!Quiz,!7.30pm,!Saracens!Head,!Highworth!
13th!Oct! ! Memorial!Service,!10am,!Kingsdown!Crematorium!
13th!Oct! ! Colours!of!Autumn!Ball,!7pm,!Alexandra!House!
30th!Oct! ! Support!Meeting,!7J9.30pm,!Broadgreen!Community!Centre!
24th!Nov! ! Xmas!Bazaar,!time!tbc,!Christchurch,!!
27th!Nov! ! Support!Meeting,!7J9.30pm,!Broadgreen!Community!Centre!
7th!Dec! ! Xmas!Memorial!Service,!time!tbc,!St!Michaels!Church!
8th!Dec! ! Xmas!Bazaar,!9amJ1pm,!Highworth!Town!Council!Offices!
Sponsored%Tots%Ride%
