ID: Stuff That Happens to Define Us

8/3/2019 ID: Stuff That Happens to Define Us

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annick presstoronto + new york + vancouver

Copyright Annick Press 2010


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CONTENTS

Introduction 4

Reconciliation 6

Orphan Boy 20

Playi ng House 36

Broken-Hearted 48

Big Girl 60

Drive 70

Exotic 86

Punched 98

the Fight 112

Mom 124

Stuck 134

Freefall 146

Afterword 156

Resources 158

2010 Kate Scowen (text)2010 Peter Mitchell (art)Design by Sheryl Shapiro and Peter Mitchell

Annick Press Ltd.All rights reserved. No part of this work covered by the copyrights hereon may be reproduced or used in any formor by any meansgraphic, electronic, or mechanicalwithout the prior written permission of the publisher.

We acknowledge the support of the Canada Council for the Arts, the Ontario Arts Council, and the Governmentof Canada through the Book Publishing Industry Development Program (BPIDP) for our publishing activities.

Cataloging in Publication

Scowen, Katei.d. : stuff that happens to define us / Kate Scowen ; illustrated by Peter Mitchell.

ISBN 978-1-55451-224-9 (pbk.).ISBN 978-1-55451-225-6 (bound)

1. Life change eventsJuvenile literature. 2. Identity(Psychology)Juvenile literature. I. Mitchell, Peter II. Title.

B F7 23 .I 56 S3 6 2 01 0 j 15 5. 4 18 2 C 20 09 -9 06 16 5- 1

Distributed in Canada by: Published in the U.S.A. by:

Firef ly Books Ltd. Annick Press (U.S.) Ltd.66 Leek Crescent Distributed in the U.S.A. by:Richmond Hill, ON Firefly Books (U.S.) Inc.L4B 1H1 P.O. Box 1338

Ellicott StationBuffalo, NY 14205

Printed in China.

Visit us at: www.annickpress.comVisit Peter Mitchell at: www.petermitchell.net

For Sydney, Hatley,

and Quinn

the best parts of m

y story.

K.S.

For my Sara, Jackso

n, and Isabel.

P.M.

This book contains general information and resources for youth. It is not intended as asubstitute for the advice of a trained medical professional. Readers should not attempt

to diagnose or treat themselves or others based on the material contained in this book,

but rather should consult an appropriate medical or psychiatric professional when

dealing with any health-related issues.The author and publisher are not responsible for

any adverse effects resulting from the information contained in this book.



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destructive parents (Freefall), or violence (Reconciliation). Others still showhow our identities can be shaped by the ways we try to fit in to meet peoplesexpectations of us, as we deal with things like body image (Big Girl), immi-gration (Exotic), and sexuality (Playing House).

All of the stories in this book are about the ways we accept and define our-selves throughout our lives, and how, for better or worse, they shape who webecome. In many ways, each of these stories is a great example of how we canbecome the master of our own identity. They show us that what defines us inyouth doesnt have to confine us forever.

This realization came at different times and through different means in eachstory. All of these people were willing to question their identities, own theirstories, and be open to changein some cases, they demanded it. The Q&Aafter each story tells you a bit more about how each person got there.

What really brought this book to life were Peters illustrations.After I edited thestories, he took over, interpreting them with his own vision. He didnt knowanything about the people behind the stories but he produced 12 beautifullyrealized pieces. I hope that you can find yourself in one of these stories, or bitsof yourself in a few.

And I hope that recognition helps you to start thinking about who you arewithin the context of your own story. Learning and accepting your story, andyour role within it, can help you to make the positive changes that will keepyou resilient and strong throughout your life.

Note: Not all stories are equalsome are so destructive that the process ofdealing with them can be overwhelming. If you are dealing with a story likethat, get help. Talk to a counselor, a friend, or trusted adult who can help youfind the support you need. You can find numbers to Canadian and U.S. hotlinesin the Resources section on page 158.

INTRODUCTION

Everybody has a story, no matter where they come from or where they haveended up. My hope is that by reading other peoples stories, youll start to thinkabout your own.

Thinking about your story is a big part of getting to know yourself, and becom-ing comfortable with who you are. With this knowledge and comfort firmly inhand,youll be better equipped to face the many challenges and successes thatare headed your way.

There will be many moments in your life when you ask yourself Who am I?If youre dealing with hardship, bad family situations, or internal struggles itcan be especially hard to see past the tough times. But life isnt just about thehere and now. You still have a lot of life ahead of you, and that means thereare a lot of opportunities for making positive change.

The stories in this book are about that kind of positive change. I asked a few

people I know who have remarkable stories to share them with me. I also sentout a call for stories through emails to networks of friends and colleagues, andthrough flyers that I posted at community and youth centers. People who sentin stories told me how much they really liked thinking about their identities.Many felt that retelling their stories was a healthy thing for them; it kind ofreaffirmed their identities and reminded them of who they are. I wish we couldhave included more of the stories people sent in but we only had room for 12.

A few of the stories are moments in time, single events that shifted peoplesidentities completely, like a punch in the face (Punched), being kidnapped(Drive),getting intoa fight (The Fight),or being deceived (Broken-hearted).

Others take place over a longer period of time, showing how identity canevolve slowly as we try to define ourselves apart from the burdens that con-fine us, like living in chaos (Mom) or a familys expectations (Stuck). Somestories are about the identities people create for themselves as protection fromthe things they cant control in their lives, like a family breakup (Orphan Boy),

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ID: Stuff That Happens to Define Us

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