How to Use Brain Whispering to Re-wire You

& Your ChildBrenda McCreight Ph.D.

What behaviors in your child trigger you to react ineffectively?

Consider these triggers – make them conscious

Have a plan to manage them when they occur

Know your own triggers

You don’t have to become entangled in the mood of others – you can pull back and disengage

Use your mirror neurons to over ride the other person’s brain chemistry and influence

Remember to use your mirror neurons & over ride button

Rick Hanson asks “Are you making your client do more laps in hell?”

Types of neuroscience based therapies – EMDR, biofeedback, neurofeedback, EFT,

brain integration therapies, many somatic based therapies, dyadic developmental psychotherapy (Arthur Becker Wiedman)

Find a therapist who knows and uses neuroscience based therapy

Many post trauma children don’t breath correctly = lack of 02 to the brain = lack of efficient cognitive processes

Aerobic exercise of any kind Weight training (if old enough) Biofeedback, yoga

Get you & your child breathing oxygen, not fire

Our children don’t generally learn from consequences

Their brains expect punishment and have a behavioral repertoire to deal with it (negatively)

Surprise the brain and notice every good thing and comment on it

Say “You’re a good person”

Give verbal rewards as much as possible

Know that when you yell you are both functioning in your amygdala

Your child isn’t hearing you and is not learning anything positive in that moment

You aren’t noticing any non-verbal messages from you child

Yelling

The consequences you use and the changes you expect to see actually feel the same to the child as the past abuse/neglect

Therefore your consequences are re-enforcing the same negative wiring

Choose when and how to use consequences

Find an activity or interest that allows success

Get creative and accepting in this endeavor Actively support it – be as involved as your

child will let you Don’t expect to see the results of this in the

present

Create Success

When you consequence by taking something away – yourself, a toy, an activity etc the result will be either an emotional shut down or an activation of the fear circuitry which will cause negative acting out

Removal = shutdown

Touch or be physically close in a way that your child can accept it

Teach how to hug Use eye contact as much as possible Be calm as much as possible Smile as much as possible

Opening your child’s mind to you

Talk to a naturopath or physician about the benefits of vitamins and the best strength and type of the age and diagnosis

Health supplements

Necessary for learning and many other complex cognitive processes including the capacity for attention

Lack of sleep decreases cognitive processes and leads to obesity and other health related problems

Sleep

Please check out Brenda’s other powerpoints at Slideshare, courses at Udemy.com, books, and web sites.

http://www.lifespancounselling.com http://www.theadoptioncounselor.com http://www.hazardousparenting.com

Email brendamccreight@gmail.com Online courses at udemy.com

Books