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HOW TO OVERCOME SHYNESS

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Shyness (also called diffidence) is the feeling of apprehension, lack of comfort, or awkwardness especially when a person is around other people. This commonly occurs in new situations or with unfamiliar people. Shyness can be a characteristic of people who have low self-esteem.We’ve both experienced different variations of shyness, and through practice and increased awareness we have both overcome this. The following are tips that have helped us overcome this uncomfortable feeling.

SHYNESS

UNDERSTAND YOUR SHYNESS

Seek to understand your unique brand of shyness and how that manifests in your life. Understand what situation triggers this feeling? And what are you concerned with at that point?

TURNING SELF CONSCIOUSNESS INTO SELF AWARENESS

Recognize that the world is not looking at you. Besides, most people are too busy looking at themselves. Instead of watching yourself as if you are other people, bring your awareness inwards. Armed with your understanding of what makes you shy, seek within yourself and become the observing presence of your thoughts. Self awareness is the first step towards any change or life improvement

FIND YOUR STRENGTHS

We all have unique qualities and different ways of expressing ourselves. It’s important to know and fully accept the things we do well, even if they differ from the norm. If everyone was the same, the world would be a pretty boring place.

LEARN TO LIKE YOURSELFPractice appreciating yourself and liking the unique expression that is

you. Write a love letter to yourself, do things you enjoy, give gratitude for

your body and its effortless functions, spend quality time getting to know

yourself, go on a self-date.

RELEASING ANXIETY THROUGH BREATH

Anxiety and fear can feel overwhelming if you are

practicing to become more assertive in order to overcome this fear.

VISUALIZATION Visualizing yourself in the situation as a

confident and happy person helps to shape your perception of yourself when you are actually in the situation. Close your eyes,

sit back somewhere relaxing, listen to some relaxing music, imagine yourself in a scene or situation and see yourself the way you would like to be. In this scene, how do you feel? What do you hear? Do you smell anything? Are you moving? What do you

see? Get all your senses involved to make it real.

AFFIRMATIONWords can carry incredible energy. What we repeatedly tell ourselves, gets heard by our unconscious mind, and it acts accordingly. If

we repeatedly tell ourselves that we are incapable, and too shy to do anything, we will

become increasingly aware of evidence to back up this ‘fact’, and our actions will always match what we tell ourselves. Similarly, if we repeatedly tell ourselves that we are capable, confident, and wonderful human beings, our

unconscious mind will likely surface the awareness that gives evidence to this new

‘fact’.

ACCEPT REJECTION Accept the possibility that we can be rejected and learning to not take it personally. Remember, you are not

alone and we all experience rejections. It is part of life and part of the learning

process.

WHAT IS COMFORTABLE FOR YOU?Going to bars and clubs isn’t for everyone,

and that’s okay. Understand what feels comfortable for you, and find people,

communities and activities which bring out the best in you. You can be just as equally social in settings that you connect with on a personal level, than the popular social

settings. You don’t have to be doing what “everyone” else is doing. Besides,

everyone else isn’t necessarily happy, despite your perception as such.

SEEK AND RECORD YOUR SUCCESSES

As you overcome this condition we’ve been labeling as shyness, you will have many wins and realizations about yourself. You will gain

insights into the truth behind social scenarios. You will start to view yourself differently and

come to recognize that you can become comfortable and confident. When these wins and realizations happen, make sure to keep a

notebook and write them down. Keeping a journal of your successes will not only boost

self confidence, but also shift your focus towards something that can benefit you.

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