ONNECT ONSC RENFREW

HOPE, HELP & HEALING

IN THIS ISSUE

2 Our Collective Voice

3 Holidays and

Special Occasions

4 Reunion Recap

5 2017 Art Calendar

5 From the Librarian

6 Voices of Recovery

WORKING TOGETHER TO ADVANCE THE EDUCATION, PREVENTION, RESEARCH AND TREATMENT OF EATING DISORDERSFA L L 2 0 1 6

a s we move into the last portion of the calendar year the words change, celebration and closure all come to mind. We are in the midst of our last seasonal change for 2016, leaves will fall, snow may come and holiday spirit will approach. Visually we notice this change – the trees look bare, the morning light shifts from a muted fall color to a brisk, clear palate, and holiday emblems and symbols appear in various spaces throughout our day. We may also experience this change in our body – feeling the chill of the evening, warming our heart by the fire, and noticing joy when we see the love of the holiday season. Change is wonderful. And change can be hard. And, change happens a lot in recovery. There are small changes, big changes, hard changes and easy changes. What would it take for you to embrace change? To trust that through the difficulty of change you may be able to witness and feel something more joyful, more fulfilling, more powerful on the other side?

And what would it take for you to celebrate that change? To rise up and acknowledge that YOU have done hard work. That no matter how small or how big the change, YOU have put in the effort, the loyalty, the dedication

RENFREW CONNECTIONS STAFF

Lara Pence, PsyDDirector of Alumni Affairs

Alecia Connlain Director of Marketing

Jenna McCormick Alumni Coordinator

CHANGE, Celebrate, & C L O S E

By: Lara Pence, PsyD

2 Hope, Help & Healing

Our Collective Voice:Letter from Renfrew’s Founder and President,

Samuel E. Menaged, JD

With the end of 2016 in sight, let’s celebrate our momentous accomplishments this year. Most notably, The Renfrew Center of Orlando opened this fall - our 17th site nationwide. Offering day treatment, intensive

outpatient and group therapy to adolescent girls and women, this site is Renfrew’s second location in Florida. Renfrew’s 40-bed residential facility in Coconut Creek, just south of Boca Raton, opened in 1990.

We not only grew through the expansion of our locations, we grew clinically through the integration and implementation of

The Renfrew Center Unified Treatment Model for Eating Disorders™ at all of our sites. This model incorporates Renfrew’s unique relational approach with an evidence-based transdiagnostic model. This has proven to be a substantial, effective tool for sparking and maintaining the changes essential for recovery.

In celebrating Renfrew’s accomplishments, I encourage you to do the same — acknowledge how you change, celebrate and close each chapter of your recovery journey. Be sure to attend this fall’s alumni reunions in October and the winter events in December. All events are free and a great way to receive support and reflect on your journey.

The Renfrew Center celebrates a year of great change and accomplishments. Moving into the winter season, we will close 2016 with gratitude as we welcome a new beginning in 2017.

Samuel e. menaged, Jd, is the Founder and President of The Renfrew Centers and The Renfrew Center Foundation. Mr. Menaged founded The Renfrew Center 31 years ago as the country’s first residential treatment facility specializing in eating disorders. He is the past-president of the Board of the Eating Disorders Coalition for Research, Policy and Action, an advocacy group based in Washington, DC and a board member of the Residential Eating Disorders Consortium. Mr. Menaged is a former healthcare attorney.

lara Pence, mBa, PSyd, cedS is the Director of Alumni Affairs at The Renfrew Center. She acquired specialized training in the treatment of eating disorders as a pre-doctoral intern at The Renfrew Center in Philadelphia, PA and post-doctoral fellow at the Center for Pediatric Eating Disorders at Children’s Medical Center in Dallas, TX. Prior to moving into her current role, she worked as both Clinical Supervisor and Site Director at The Renfrew Center of Texas.

Dr. Pence has a unique expertise and perspective in the field of eating disorders in that she has worked in all levels of care—inpatient, residential, and outpatient alike. She has been featured in various media outlets such as Good Morning America, the BBC, WebMD, Psychology Today, The Huffington Post and local Dallas print.

CHANGE, Celebrate, & C L S E

to see that change through. It is not just the process of change that it is important but it is also the recognition and acknowl-edgement that goes into honoring that change. How might you reflect on the changes that you have made over the last year and give yourself the respect and accolades that you deserve and that will push you on in this journey. Standing up and saying, “I did that! I made that happen!” is not an exercise in being conceited, selfish or grandiose. It is a statement celebrating that what you do matters!

And then, there’s the closure part. You embrace change, you celebrate it and, then you say goodbye. You wave your hand and bid farewell to behaviors that once kept you stagnant, that once prevented you from taking any kind of step in the direc-tion of joy. You own that they once had a place in your life and now they are no longer welcome. You deserve to put to rest and to experience closure in that part of this journey. It’s okay to say goodbye. Like change, it’s not always easy, but when you embrace it you have a greater chance of truly living the life that you were meant to live.

www.renfrewcenter.com 3

Eating three balanced meals per day plus snacks can be hard to manage. Even for people doing well in their recovery, there are decisions, conflicting

or negative thoughts, planning, scheduling and financial strains. And if

every regular day has the potential for that much stress, it can be that

much harder to manage when there is an additional change from the

usual routine. So when holidays and special events come around, it is

essential – even for those far in recovery – to do some extra planning. It’s

important to have the right tools for a job, and it can be helpful to think of

changes in routine as a new job.

First of all, it is important to try and figure out what is stressful about the

change, and break it down into specific triggers. That way it can become

less overwhelming and you can try and focus on problem-solving instead.

Additionally, changes can be a great time to practice reframing your

thoughts from negative to positive and practicing your coping skills.

Instead of telling yourself it’s too much, you can’t do it, or you’re not good

enough, say, “This feels like too much right now, so maybe I need to try

something new.”

Is food raising your stress level? Maybe you need some help planning how

to navigate a holiday meal or wedding buffet table. A dietician can help you

make a plan for how holiday treats can fit in to your meal plan and meet

your exchanges, or how to practice some flexibility and allow yourself to

enjoy foods that you would not eat every day.

Is it the change that’s increasing your anxiety? If so, you might need to

focus on your planning and structuring or your ability to delegate.

Some people struggle with too much free time and others have a hard time

juggling extra responsibilities in their already busy days. This can be a great

time to ask for help, examine your priorities, challenge your perfectionism,

or try a new activity or hobby.

Sarah Bateman, lcSW, has been practicing social work for more than 10 years. As The Renfrew Center’s Liaison to the Jewish community, she ensures that individuals with eating disorders in the Jewish community are able to receive culturally sensitive treatment and that their unique religious needs are met. Ms. Bateman has a private practice with offices in New York and New Jersey, provides training for professionals and lectures in schools while working to

raise awareness and understanding of eating disorders in the Jewish community.

Is it the family? For many people having

too much time with family over holidays or at

special occasions can be difficult, and for

others, little family or supports can be lonely and

triggering. It is helpful to remember that friends

can be the family that they choose. For some

it can be helpful to remember to use their

voices when they are with their families. Again,

breaking it down into what is specifically

challenging for you can help you to find the

tool that will be most helpful.

Finally, it can be useful to try and get out of

your own head and focus instead on what

the celebration is about. Are you dreading a

holiday meal or gathering? Try to think about

the meaning of the holiday and why you

celebrate it. If you’ve had bad associations with

it in the past, try to identify what you’d like to

get out of it this year. Are you nervous about

going to a wedding? Try focusing instead on

celebrating the people and how you can help

make it a happy occasion for them.

When a regular day is overwhelming, a holiday,

special occasion or change in routine can feel

like too much. But with a little empathy for

yourself, you can work on breaking it down,

trying to find tools to use for specific triggers

and challenging negative thoughts into an

opportunity to look for the positive in this

change.

Holidays and Special Occasions: Finding the Right Tools for the Job

4 Hope, Help & Healing

By: Chelsey Rains

My first Renfrew Reunion is one for the books. The day started off with a light breakfast, catching up with the staff and introducing ourselves to the

group. Many of these women traveled many hours to attend this wonderful event, including myself. It was amazing to see new and familiar faces and hear how recovery has changed their lives.

Following introductions, Melanie Smith and I shared the stage together. I spoke about my recovery and the new, enjoyable life I have without my

eating disorder. Melanie then shared information about Renfrew’s unified treatment program and how effectively it’s working in the recovery of the patients. “Leaning In” to uncomfortable emotions and situations is really how we defeat this disorder.

After sharing my recovery story, we then split off into the workshops where I was accompanied

by my three best friends. Together we went to the ‘Relationships in Recovery’ group. I loved having them with me to share their experience of seeing a loved one go through an eating disorder. We opened up and shared about various topics. They were able to understand the thought process of those struggling with an eating disorder and how friendships/relationships influence recovery. Other groups offered throughout the day included Dance Movement Therapy, Advanced Recovery, Art Therapy, and many more!

We made new friends and reconnected with old friends. Each woman’s story was beautiful. Their strength and perseverance it takes to battle an eating disorder was empowering

It was nice to be back at Renfrew on the other side of my eating disorder. The experience of being able to share it with my best friends was a moment I won’t soon forget. We all left with a new perspective and a little gift from the staff. It couldn’t have been a better day!

Chelsey Rains is from Monroe, NC. She is an alumna of The Renfrew

Centers of Florida and Charlotte. She is currently a student at Wingate

University studying Psychology. She has created a non-profit organization

called ‘Love Yourself Movement’ which encourages men and women to

have self-love. She hopes to one day provide scholarships for treatment

to individuals struggling with eating disorders.

By: Tara S.

When I arrived at The Renfrew Center of Philadelphia for the 2016 reunion, it seemed both familiar and foreign. It was a place that I needed at a certain time and have

since outgrown. I felt slightly out of place, but in the best possible way.

During the welcoming remarks we learned about some of Renfrew’s recent changes. As a psychology graduate student who reads research about evidence-based treatments, I was pleased that Renfrew had incorporated the Unified Treatment Model into its programming. From my first admission in 1997 to my last in 2001, I had seen Renfrew undergo many changes; it is encouraging to watch Renfrew continue to adapt and grow.

Later in the day, I participated in art therapy. Our task was to illustrate our paths through our eating disorders and recovery and to depict where we currently were. Renfrew helped me to connect with my emotions and to express myself in ways which didn’t involve self-harm. This, however, was the first time I created artwork at Renfrew which had an

overall hopeful tone. In the process, I was prompted to reflect on experiences from which I now feel distant. I could honor my journey while reaffirming that my mentality is completely different than it was when I first entered treatment nearly 20 years ago.

Both the morning and afternoon speakers discussed having had ambivalence about recovery. I remember that ambivalence well. I remember the ambivalence turning into fear and the fear turning into hopelessness. Recovery can seem impossible to

imagine. For many of us, our eating disorders helped us manage emotions and situations we feared could destroy us. We spent our time in treatment planning for recovery, sometimes not even knowing if we wanted it. Yet much of recovery is about what we do when things don’t go as planned. For this reason, it is essential that we practice healthy coping mechanisms when not in crisis. We must cultivate relationships and nurture passions so that when we feel weaker they are already stronger. Both alumnae highlighted the importance of using skills we learned at Renfrew and of bringing positive forces into our lives.

In attending the reunion it struck me that “leaning in” involves more than simply tolerating discomfort; sometimes it means embracing discomfort. Our struggles are what make us vulnerable and what urge us to challenge our beliefs about who we are and want to be. They are what make us real and raw and leave us open for connection with others.

It is frightening to recover from an eating disorder, and we might wonder what will be left of us without it. Eating disorders involve loss, and giving up an eating disorder is another form of loss. We lose the false comfort, the shield which separates us from both pain and growth. So when we shed the eating disorder, yes, we lose something, but we do not lose a piece of ourselves; instead, we gain a piece of ourselves and become more of who we really are.

Tara attends graduate school in Washington, DC for psychology and works on research

related to emotion regulation, suicidality, and self-injury. She was first inpatient at The

Renfrew Center of Philadelphia in 1997 and last in 2001.

www.renfrewcenter.com 5

We have all heard about the beneficial physical effects of practicing yoga. The authors have added another dimension to these benefits by discussing how yoga and a healthy body image are intertwined. Melanie Klein is a professor of Sociology and Women’s Studies and Anna Guest-Jelley is a renowned yoga trainer and founder of CurvyYoga.com. Together they have collaborated on this book which collects 25 personal stories of hardship, courage, and how finding yoga helped them learn to love their bodies as is.

The personal narratives cover a wide range of diverse individuals and include pregnant women, people with disabilities, addicts, people of different cultures, and people of the LGBT community. All have endured body image conflict at some point and found body image balance through a yoga discipline. Some of the

stories, for example, are told by singer and songwriter, Alanis Morissette, a former U.S. Army Airborne Ranger, a clinical psychologist, and a professor of sociology. You can see just how diverse a collection of voices are represented in this book.

The intended audience for this collection is just as diverse and therefore universal. Psychologists, other health professionals, yoga devotees, counselors, as well as anyone struggling with body image issues will find this an inspiring read. Whether you are attempting to help someone trying to reconcile body image with societal stereotypes or you are indeed one looking for reconciliation, this book will inspire and set you on a path toward loving the body you’re in.

From the LibrarianYOGA AND BODY IMAGE: 25 personal stories about beauty, bravery and loving your body by Melanie Klein and Anna Guest-Jelley. Llewellyn Publications, ©2014.

Submitted by: Eileen Binckley, Librarian

The Renfrew Center is pleased to

announce the 2017 Art Calendar,

Expressing the Voice Within.

The calendar features original

artwork created by patients

through art therapy at Renfrew.

To order your calendar, please

visit www.renfrewcenter.com

Order Your 2017 Art Calendar Today!

FREE WEBINARS For alumni, family and those needing support in their journey.

Nov. 16th Believing in Full Recovery Presented by: Lara Pence, PsyD, CEDS and Beth Mayer, LICSW Dec. 21st A New Year, A New You Presented by: Lara Pence, PsyD, CEDS and Johanna Kandel

All webinars are FREE and run from Noon to 1 PM and 6 PM to 7 PM EST.

To register, please visit www.renfrewcenter.com

The Renfrew Center of Orlando – NOW OPEN!Located at: 3452 Lake Lynda Drive, Suite 120, Orlando, FL 32817

Programming consists of:

• Day Treatment• Intensive Outpatient• Group Therapy

We’re excited to have opened our 17th location nationally in Orlando, Florida. This site is Renfrew’s second facility in Florida. Our 40-bed, residential program in Coconut Creek is just south of Boca Raton.

To schedule an assessment or for more information, please call 1-800-RENFREW.

VOICES OF RECOVERY

6 Hope, Help & Healing

By: E.C. Burns

I cannot remember when my dIsordered eatIng thoughts and desIres fIrst made way Into my lIfe, but I can remember acting on them in different ways from a young age.

Growing up in a health-obsessed and completely dysfunctional family led me to feel out of control of most things in my environment, but food was one of the few things I could maintain power over. It was the summer between my sophomore and junior year of college when I underwent a stomach surgery that led to multiple complications and several months on a feeding tube – this was the beginning of my eating disorder’s plan to take over my life.

While my specific behaviors and urges do not feel appropriate to mention, I can say that I developed a great friendship with how I was living and that the decision to seek help from The Renfrew Center was one of the most difficult things I had ever contemplated. I spent six weeks at The Renfrew

Center of Florida, where I latched onto the UT model and found great strength in the reading and exercises we would do daily in group therapy.

This mindset followed me to the Day Treatment Program at The Renfrew Center in Nashville, where I was a patient for seven weeks. There, the work I began in residential really came to fruition and I was able to recognize aspects of my life that needed to change in order to keep my recovery

intact. That is why, after finishing Day Treatment, I made the move to New York to start a new life. This move was only successful because of a few things: my recovery remained the most important part of my life, I was able to attend IOP at The Renfrew Center of New York, and I continued to diligently fill out ARCs and my EDAs to track the progress of my recovery.

I sit here now, typing this, seven months sober, seven months into recovery and seven months into filling out my ARCs and EDAs daily. I feel as though I have my meal plan under control, but my partner will randomly ask me to fill out a food journal for the day to help me keep my exchanges in check. Leverage the support Renfrew provides through their treatment. Leverage the support offered to you by others – it gets you so much further than you think, and these things can stiffen the foundation of the early stages of recovery.

E.C. Burns is a multidisciplinary artist who lives in Brooklyn, New York with her partner and supporter, Jenni-Claire. Currently working for Warby Parker, E.C. is navigating her way through the eyewear lifestyle industry and developing new perspectives on the world daily. She faces the challenges of early recovery head on, and finds strength through tracking her progress through EDA graphs as well as sharing her story with the Renfrew Community.

By: Liz Gulsvig

Eating disorders are deceitful, paranoiac beasts. They burrow deep, settling comfortably into parts of you that are dark and obscure, parts you’d rather keep surreptitious.

But they bleed out. They become fundamental. They steer.

I became anorexic around 12 years old. It started as a willful diet based in a self-hatred and disgust so deep, I simply couldn’t stop. After a traumatic experience at 14, it tightened. After a short stint at treatment, I went to

college and became bulimic. I leaned on drugs and alcohol for escape until I became a full-blown addict. Traumatic experiences lined my days, still and needy, plants on a windowsill. I ignored them, let them wilt and creep, limbs reaching. Eventually, I would end up living in my car while I finished graduate school. How I finished is still a mystery to me: all of those heavy, laborious texts and bright-eyed prodigies eagerly interrupting

each other while I bathed myself in the cafeteria bathroom sink, picking limp cigarette butts out of the ashtrays. But I did it, even got clean, and married someone incredible.

I entered Renfrew a few years after trying to do it myself, toying with orthorexia and exercise bulimia. I spent nearly a year in PHP and IOP programs at Renfrew and graduated somewhere between points A and B. I can’t always throw a wrench in my behavior, but I think I get it. Using the UT model I learned to analyze each little thread, tugging until I provoked the sleepy source, marveling at the complicated web. I learned odd tricks in the strange art of self-compassion. And I had people, all around me, backing me up.

Settling into life has its roadblocks. I didn’t graduate a shining star, a perfect model of recovery. I try my best. I apply what I learned, as uncomfortable as it may be. I let the flavor of imperfection settle around me: the slips and the fits, the flails and fails, the nakedness. Sometimes I emerge a calm, collected thing: the moon. Other times I’m pure violence, tripping over my own spit and guts, all animal. It’s okay. Recovery for me isn’t always about eradication – sometimes it’s just distance. As I learned with the UT model, the art of creating room between things is a key skill. Renfrew helped me tease apart these knots so I could gain some of this room, put space between myself and my thoughts, actions, feelings. This is no small thing.

This, my friends, is astronomical.

Liz Gulsvig attended The Renfrew Center of Dallas from April

to November 2015. She is currently working as a copywriter after

receiving her BA and MA in English. Liz writes poetry and keeps

a blog about recovery called Eye Still Brave.

www.renfrewcenter.com 7

VOICES OF RECOVERYBy: Rachel Spring

Years before I heard the term “eating disorder,” I had become trapped in a cycle of behaviors that allowed me to numb, disconnect, isolate, and otherwise

“manage” all of my emotions. By the time I finally sought help over ten years later, my behaviors had become so normal to me that I had no idea what they were. All I knew was that my mind and body were struggling to function, I could no longer work, and day to day living felt physically and mentally impossible. Only when I found myself in the hospital did I realize I needed help from someone who knew what they were doing; I could no longer pretend to be “okay.”

When I started treatment at The Renfrew Center of Nashville, I fully expected myself to be good to go in three or four weeks. After all, I didn’t think I really had an eating disorder. Just some simple habits that weren’t exactly “normal.” I am so thankful that the staff there knew much more than I did. Although, I had gone to counseling to talk about past traumas and family abuse, it

wasn’t until I started at Renfrew that any real healing began. I can truly say that the UT model is what still gets me through hard times today. My therapists helped me begin to understand the connections between my mind, body, and feelings, and how they were all related to the urges and behaviors that made up my eating disorder. I never knew that sadness caused some behaviors while fear caused different ones, or that the way I felt in my body had nothing to do with how I looked and everything to do with how I felt. I began to realize that I had been blaming my body for everything bad that had happened to me, when really it wasn’t my body that I hated, but rather the feelings of hurt, anger, sadness and fear.

After a year of Day Treatment, IOP and Aftercare, I’m experiencing life in a way I never could have imagined. I have real relationships (with ups and downs), and I’m starting graduate school for Marriage and Family Therapy. I still have scary feelings sometimes, but nothing feels impossible, and the feelings of safety and peace outweigh fear every time. Renfrew didn’t give me my life back. They helped me create a new life that is much, much better.

Rachel Spring is an alumna of The Renfrew Center of Nashville. She is passionate about helping others know their worth and it currently working towards a Master’s degree in Marriage and Family Therapy in Chattanooga, TN.

By: Kelly Hoey

I learned early on durIng my tIme at renfrew how dIstorted thInkIng can be passed down from generation to generation without our knowledge. I was taught from a young age that the number on

the scale determined my worth and level of happiness. This lesson came from my mother whose mother taught her and whose mother taught her.

This mentality began to work against me by the age of 16 when I would deprive/starve myself and anything I did consume would be purged. When purging began to take over my life, I was able to stop it on my own but continued depriving myself for the next 10 years. Without knowing it, I became scared of food – too much, too little, what kind, was it good, was it bad – it was too much to understand and gain control over.

In my twenties, I entered a relationship that I thought would allow me to “be me” and as a result, gained substantial weight over the next decade. My fears of food continued to grow and consume me. I couldn’t go to the grocery store without feeling anxious and scared. If I went out to eat with friends, I would go out of control, eating way beyond the feeling of full. If I was happy, sad, anxious or angry, I would eat to numb my feelings.

The year I turned 40, my life came crashing down around me. I was in a broken marriage, had no relationship with my mother and my job had become stressful and unfulfilling. After a stressful work week where I binged/overate for three consecutive days, my demons became fully exposed. For the following week I binged and purged as depression took over my brain and despair took over my body. I realized I had to seek help – not from another diet plan, weight loss supplement or self-help book but from people who could walk me through the why’s and what’s that were driving me to harm myself this way.

Attending Renfrew changed my life. As an adult with an eating disorder, I knew I would have to enter treatment with an open-mind, heart and spirit, expressing my truth with utmost honesty or I would only hurt myself. Through the UT model, I shared my experiences and pains, expressing my struggles through art projects and tackling my distorted thinking about food through meal-times together and meal planning – I learned not only about my triggers and my disordered thoughts about food, but about the legacy that proceeded me and how it formed my warped thoughts and actions.

I can now look at myself and be more patient and loving to this body and mind and give myself space to breathe and live a life that I have chosen for myself. I am forever thankful that Renfrew helped me break the cycle of self-hatred and abuse so I can raise my daughter to love who she is. But most importantly, I will not let the number on the scale dictate what I feel or define who I am.

Kelly Hoey is an alumna of The Renfrew Center of Charlotte. She is 47 years old and has an 11-year-old daughter. Kelly has a BS in Communications from Appalachian State University and works as a Marketing Manager/Account Supervisor.

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