Heroes at Home 2012

honoring our unsung heroes for their sacrifices, strengths and their commitment to our hampton roads community

w w w . f l a g s h i p n e w s . c o m • w w w . m i l i t a r y n e w s . c o m • 8 t h e d i t i o n

| HEROES AT HOME - 8th ANNIVERSARY | MAY 2012

We recognize the important role ourmilitary spouses play in the Hampton Roads community and thank you foryour dedication, service and support

of our Armed Services!

We recognize the important role ourmilitary spouses play in the Hampton Roads community and thank you foryour dedication, service and support

of our Armed Services!

CongratulationsTo the 2012 Heroes at Home Nominees!

USA Discounters is extremely proud to be the

Presenting Sponsorof the Military Spouse Awards

for the eighth consecutive year!

www.usadiscounters.netwww.usadiscounters.net


The Flagship® Managing Editor:DAVID TODD

Contributing Writer:TIFFANY SILVERBERG

Sales Development Manager:ADAIR WELLS

HEROES AT HOME • 2012 MILITARY SPOUSE GUIDE

MILITARYNEWSPAPERSOF VIRGINIA

Published byMilitary Newspapers of Virginia

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Phone: (757) 222-3990Fax: (757) 853-1634

The contents of this special section are not necessarily theofficial views of or endorsed by the U.S. government, the DoD,the DoT or the U.S. Coast Guard. Opinions of contributingwriters do not necessarily reflect the opinions of MilitaryNewspapers of Virginia or The Flagship®.

The availability of these newspapers and the appearanceof advertising in these publications, including any inserts orsupplements, do not constitute endorsement by the federalgovernment, the DoD, the DoT, the U.S. Coast Guard or MilitaryNewspapers of Virginia of products or services advertised.

Military Newspapers of Virginia is a private firm in no wayconnected to the Department of Defense or United StatesCoast Guard.

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Photographer:HARRY GERWIEN

Editorial (757) 222-3970Advertising (757) 222-3990 • [email protected]

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Publisher: LAURA BAXTER

Have you ever noticed that superhe-roes all have super homes? Superman’sFortress of Solitude, Batman’s Batcave,the X-men’s X-Mansion. They are all impos-ing from the outside and indulgent on theinside. Passersby marvel at the architec-ture. Enemies quiver at the very sight. Noone dares mess with anyone inside thebulwarks of such grandeur.

And the superhero tucked away insideknows. He is very aware of just how safehe is. He goes about his superhero day inthe soft, comfortable lair he has created forhimself? He smokes a pipe, sips bourbon,or does whatever it is that superheroeswith unlimited funds and few worries do.He rests knowing nothing can penetratehis fortress.

And then he gets a call. A call thatsomeone needs him. A call that says hehas to put on his suit, or cape, or armor– and leave the confines of his superhome. He has to go out into a world whereanything can happen, where things aren’t

peaceful, and perfect, and unlimited. Hehas to put it all aside, risk it all and do whathe’s called to do. He has to be a super-hero … in order to go back and enjoy thesuper life.

When I consider the role of a militaryspouse, I think of the lairs they create fortheir super Sailor, Airman, Marine, CoastGuardsman or Soldier. Even as mobile asthat home has to be, wherever they arecalled to establish it, they work tirelessly tomake it soft, inviting and ultimately impen-etrable. They ensure that their family hasall the resources, opportunities and toolsthey need to succeed outside the doors ofthe lair. And they welcome them back afterevery long absence.

And they too, get the call. The call thata neighbor needs help. The call that theschool needs a volunteer. The call thatthe squadron needs morale assistance.The call that someone, somewhere needsthem. Sometimes the calls are relentless,keeping them constantly from the confinesof the lair. And yet, it’s for those it housesthat they answer the calls. The love withinthose four walls gives them the courage toput on the cape, answer the call, and bethe superheroes they are.

This year we celebrate our “super-heroes at home.” Founded in 2005, theHeroes at Home Military Spouse Awardsrecognize our unsung heroes for the sac-rifices and strengths, their commitmentsto our community and for the challengesthey overcome – every day. For the 8thconsecutive year, the military and civiliancommunities join forces to honor all of our2012 nominees and name the finalists and

2012 Heroes at Home Military Spouse ofthe Year. In this issue, we profile the 10finalists whom our judges selected as true“Heroes at Home.”

WE SALUTE YOU

ADAIR WELLS – Founder, Heroesat Home/Sales DevelopmentManager, The Flagship® and MilitaryNewspapers of Virginia

HEATHER WELCH – PublicAffairs Specialist, Commander, NavyRegion Mid-Atlantic

JIM BOWLES – PromotionsCoordinator, Max Media

KENITA BOWERS – CommunityAffairs Media Coordinator, WAVYTV10 & FOX43

KRISTIN AUCH – Spouse ofColonel Kory Auch, Commander,Joint Base Langley-Eustis

LAURA BAXTER – Publisher, TheFlagship® and Military Newspapersof Virginia

LEN SANTIVASCI (U.S. Navy,Retired) – Director of Marketing,USA Discounters

SARA JANE ARNETT – 2012Heroes at Home Military Spouse ofthe Year

SUE HOPPIN – Founder, NationalMilitary Spouse Network (MNSN)

2012 COMMITTEE INCLUDED:


Alisa Baldwin has the unique perspectiveof being an Army mom, before she becamean Army wife. Although her husband enlistedinto the Army for a few years, after highschool, he finished his enlistment before theymet and married. As Alisa’s husband workedas a law enforcement officer, the two raisedthree sons and two daughters. Even thoughthey were a civilian family, “there was a militarylifestyle,” Alisa says. “We still had the sameArmy values.”

When her oldest son graduated anddecided to join the Army, it was not a hugeshock for Alisa and her family. It was even lessso when the next son graduated and enlisted,and the third son as well. It was a path theyhad discussed and a lifestyle that was alwayshonored and respected. Still, Alisa felt acertain apprehension. She struggled at timeswrapping her head around the idea of hersons going off to war – her little men puttingon full-grown uniforms and defending thecountry.

“I was used to my husband doing extremethings, such as in law enforcement,” Alisaexplained. “But even though my sons arehusbands and Soldiers, they really are my littleboys.”

When her youngest son decided he wantedto enlist, he challenged his father ... “I’ll do it ifyou do.” That was all it took. Soon, Alisa was anArmy mom of three, and Army wife of one. Inaddition, she has two daughters-in-law that are

active duty military. She admitsthat the emotions of having somany of her dearest loved onesin uniform are heavy, but herpride outweighs any negativityshe feels.

“I’m very proud of them,” shesays. “Whether they make it acareer or not, I’m really proudthat they serve.”

Those heavy emotionsbecame very real when two

of her oldest sons and her husband were alldeployed in the same time period. Her oldestson left for Afghanistan, then her husband leftfor Kuwait. When her oldest went to Kuwaiton his way home, he and his father werein theater together. Then her oldest camehome as her second was deployed, travelingthrough Kuwait as well, having time in thesame theater as his father.

“How many can say, ‘father and son intheater?” Alisa asks. “But to have two sonsand father in theater!”

It’s a story the family won’t soon forget. Heryoungest son is eagerly awaiting his first timeto deploy so he can add his stories to thefamily album.

How does Alisa keep herself busy duringthe chaos deployments? She flies back tosee her disabled mother often, helping heras she needs. She spends time withher five kids and three grandkidswhen she can. She works full-timeas an office manager for a productdistribution company which provideseverything from water bottles to beefjerky for government and militarysources primarily.

“It’s dealing with the military, whichI love,” Alisa says. “I’m honored as amilitary spouse to work for veteransthat understand.”

Alisa also goes to school full-time.She is getting a Masters degree inpublic administration, with plans towork in the military community. She

currently volunteers with a number of militaryorganizations.

“When my sons joined, I had found supportgroups,” Alisa says. “But I needed to serve.”

She started looking for opportunities togive back to the military community, while find-ing support for herself and got involved withBlue Star Families. She currently serves asthe president of Blue Star Moms of HamptonRoads.

“We work alongside moms who under-stand,” Alisa says. “They’ve all been throughmultiple deployments. We work hard to sendcare packages, work with Wounded Warriorsand work with homeless veterans.”

When the moment arises, she also pres-ents gold flags to mothers of fallen servicemembers. As difficult as it is, “It’s really fulfill-ing to know that you can do those things,” sheexplains.

Alisa also serves as the president of herhusband’s unit’s Family Readiness Group.She believes in being proactive as a militaryspouse – preparing for any number of issuesbefore they arise.

“What I’ve told younger wives is, have asmany tools as you can to deal with deploy-ments,” she explains. “Get your checklists,such as back up day care and financial plans.Have everything lined up and get as manytools as you can to reduce the stress.”


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Volunteering is the foundation for SandyBarker’s family. Sandy and her husband, Blairmet at a volunteering event over 19 years ago.As a Navy wife of over 17 years, Sandy hascommitted herself to volunteer work – withinthe Navy and the community around her.

“I like to get my kids involved too,” Sandysays, encouraging them to find volunteerprojects where they can and to join her in herefforts, such as the drive for Hurricane Katrinavictims she helped to coordinate.

“I really love helping out – especially theyoung spouses,” Sandy says. “I remember asa young spouse myself not knowing anyonefor nine months.” She recalls the early dayswhen her husband would leave for monthsat a time and she would be home with theirbaby. Once she even had to move by herselfwhile her husband was gone.

“The only other spouse I knew at the timehelped me move, and she had a two-year-old,”Sandy said. Having a lack of support aroundher left Sandy frustrated and lonely.

At their next duty station, Sandy deter-mined to not be alone.

“From then, I got involved wherever I couldget involved,” Sandy explained. She looks forevery opportunity to serve those around her,to build a strong community.

In 1998, Sandy stepped up to take on herfirst ombudsman role. Since then, she hastaken on an ombudsman role at five differentcommands, six different times. She takes

her leadership role among thefamilies to heart. In one of herfirst commands, she facilitateda transfer to Italy. The ship, andall the families associated withit, were being transplantedthere. She went ahead of theship to explore Italy and theregion they were going to liveto report back to the families allthe details of the move and toset everything up for the new

command.At another duty station, she set up “spouse

tours” for young Sailors’ wives who were newto Navy life. She would gather everyone incars, or a van, and shuttle them around thebase. She would show them where to sign upfor things and where to find all the resourcesthey needed. They forged friendships, whilebeing equipped for their lives ahead. Theprogram she created is still in use five yearslater. Sandy faces every task with a sense ofeagerness and excitement.

But she wasn’t always that way. Sandysays that she was a very shy person growingup in Iowa. Since marrying her Sailor andtraveling the world with him, in 10 moves andsix deployments, with lots of port calls in be-tween, Sandy has learned to seek adventureand find opportunities to get involved.

With her job coordinating vendorsat the commissary, Sandy has beenable to gather food that is gettingready to expire or is out of season,and distribute to Sailors, families andcommands. She is always looking forthose in need and resources avail-able to help.

Over her years as an ombuds-man, Sandy has organized turkeydinner drives for Navy families,driven spouses to the hospital forsurgery or to give birth, and stayedin contact with families throughoutnumerous deployments and difficulttimes. Sandy also coordinated the

Video Teleconferencing program during herhusband’s last deployment. While the USSGeorge H.W. Bush was deployed, Sandywould schedule sessions, three times a week,for families to sign up to video chat with theirSailors aboard the ship.

“Seeing your Sailor on the big screen isjust awesome,” Sandy said. “There were lotsof smiles and lots of tears.”

Making a life for herself also includes focus-ing on the needs of her family. Sandy has twoteenage sons.

“Military life is hard regardless of who youare. It depends on how you handle it,” Sandysays. “I handle it by staying busy and helpingothers. Make a life for yourself while he’sgone.”

She is involved with her sons’ band pro-grams, helping with fundraisers and gettingthem to all the events they have to attend.

“They have special needs, and they’veturned out to be wonderful young men!” shesays.

She also donates time and resources tolocal animal shelters. And yet, with very littletime for herself, she says it’s worth it.

“Without my husband, I couldn’t have doneany of this,” she says, referring to the adventur-ous life she’s made in the Navy. “And withoutmy being strong, he couldn’t do his job.”


Susan Doyle considers herself to be veryblessed as a military spouse. Her husbandjoined a bit later in life than most at 26 yearsold. Even though she has only been a military

spouse for the last four years,Susan has jumped headfirst intoa number of leadership positions.

“I gravitate toward leader-ship,” Susan says. “It just comesnaturally to me.”

One of her first leadershiproles was the job of FamilyReadiness Group president forthe USS Jason Dunham (DDG109). Being new to Navy life, sheloves to encourage spouses asthey transition in. As the Dunham

is a newly commissioned ship, she not onlytook on the leadership job, but she also that oflaunching the ship’s first FRG.

“It’s been a good challenge,” Susan says.“It’s a good learning opportunity to establish anew FRG. We are a very strong group.” She

puts much of the focus of the FRG’s successon the other wives she serves with.

As the FRG president, Susan has helpedcoordinate a number of command events –from Christmas parties to spa days for thespouses. She looks for opportunities to getmale spouses involved and to keep the moraleup among all the families. In her regular emailsto the families, she shares local events andactivities for families to get involved with. Sheis a big believer in staying busy and keepingcalendars full, especially during deployments orother difficult times.

“The military spouse can just get lost in themarriage to a service member – both new andold alike,” Susan explains. “There are so manyresources and opportunities in the community,so I try to put those into their hands, so whentheir spouse leaves, they don’t feel lost.” She

WE KNOW WHENTO SALUTE.

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wants spouses to always remember that theyaren’t just a tagalong. They need to find thingsthat they enjoy doing to keep themselves busy.

Another way Susan keeps herself busy iswith her local Protestant Women of the Chapel(PWOC) group. Again, tending toward herleadership nature, Susan stepped up right awayas a teacher for the group.

“Every military wife wants some kind ofspiritual encouragement,” Susan says. “This isjust another resource I found.” With the PWOC,Susan also helps with the monthly Spouses ofthe Deployed dinner. She helps primarily withdecorating and set up. And when her husbandis deployed, she also attends the dinner.

“It’s so important to have a full calendar,” shereminds us.

Aside from all her Navy volunteering roles,Susan also homeschools her two kids, agesfive and seven.

Such a full schedule is demanding, butSusan says as long as she stays organized,she can keep it all going. She also sets asidespecial time for each tasks, rather than lettingthe tasks rule her.

“For me, my mornings are booked,” sheexplains. “I let very little intrude on that.” She

uses that time for her kids and homeschooling.And keeping her priorities straight is her key tosuccess. “If I fail my kids, I’ve totally failed,” shesays. Susan values homeschooling as a stableenvironment for her kids. Because they were anolder, established family when they joined themilitary, Susan wanted to be sure she createdcertain stable features in her kids’ lives. Sheprotects those very carefully.

Yet she also acknowledges that jugglingNavy responsibilities and family life canbe difficult.

“You can easily feel torn,” sheadmits. “If there is an evening I will begone, I try to explain what I’m doingand why I’m doing it.” She finds thatwhen she takes the time to explainthings to her children, they can betteradapt to changes. And often, she getsthem involved with her volunteeringprojects – from stuffing bags to creat-ing handouts. She hopes it will teachthem to live a life of service.

Through all the tasks she takeson, Susan remembers a mantra herparents taught her:

“Try to go to bed tired every night.”

She enjoys the satisfaction of using everyounce of energy and collapsing into bed everyevening. She encourages other spouses tofind similar opportunities to get involved and tospend their energy every day.

Susan likes to remind spouses that thereis and will be life after years in the military anduntil then, “This is a tough life, but if you can justembrace the whole opportunity, it’s a privilegeto be a military spouse.”


As a former Soldier herself, and an Armywife, Kate Dunbar is intimately aware of thestruggles of military wife.

“The older I get, the more I realize what alucky life we have,” she says. It’s that outlookthat drives Kate through the difficulties ofArmy life and keeps her focused on thevolunteer projects in which she is involved.

As a single Soldier, Kate was deployed toDesert Storm. Years later, after she was mar-ried and a mother of two sons, she receivedorders to Afghanistan. As her husband wasalso deployed, Kate had to leave her boyswith their grandparents while she served inAfghanistan.

“I decided I wanted to be with the kids,”she says. She finished her time with theArmy and refocused her goals on servingthe military community.

“Even when I was in the Army, I wouldtry to do what I could to serve the spousesclub, because I knew it was important,” Kateexplains. “I always enjoyed doing that.”

When her husband joined his current unit,Kate noticed that there were nearly 1,000Soldiers attached to the unit. “And they allhave some kind of family connection,” shenoted. Kate stepped up as a leader in theunit’s Family Readiness Group. She staysin communication with the unit’s families,especially before and during deployments.As a senior advisor, she trains and supportsnewer spouses as they learn to take on lead-

ership roles within the FRG. Asshe brings up new leadership,she ensures the strength, unityand consistency of the unit, aswell as the Army as a whole.

Kate volunteers throughoutthe Army community as well.She has served two terms asthe president of the SpousesClub of Fort Eustis. She servesyoung families and the commu-

nity by volunteering at the base thrift store.Her service continues as an Army Commu-nity Services trainer and member of variousadvisory committees. She enjoys sharing herskills and insight with young families. Sheworks to make sure families always have aplace to turn.

“If they feel welcome, they know they havesomeone to talk to,” she says.

Kate is also very involved with the Casu-alty Response Team program.

“When we were at Fort Bragg, we tookclasses on tragedy response teams,” Kateexplains. “There are some situations, asunfortunate as they are, you have to bestrong.” Through these classes, Kate learnedthe best ways to step up and aid whentragedies occur.

At a recent command, a Soldier’s wifedied unexpectedly. As a memberof the tragedy response team, Katehelped organize the support thefamily needed.

“It’s the little things,” she explains.Her team visited, brought toys,watched the kids and took care ofall the small details as arrangementswere made.

“To this day, he calls every sooften,” Kate explains. “It’s the smallthings that make such a huge differ-ence. Its not easy, but its necessaryand I would hope that someonewould do that for me. “

In addition to all her volunteer

roles, Kate has a part-time job with MilitaryChild Education Coalition’s Parent to Parentprogram. She works as a liaison betweenthe base and local schools. She loves thatit’s just another way to support the Armyfamilies and that it’s a flexible job.

“If you can find a job that can travel withyou, that’s always the best,” Kate explains.

That flexibility allows Kate time with herfamily. Kate’s youngest son is a freshman inhigh school. Her oldest is preparing to enlistin the Army. Kate is preparing to be an Armymom – after being a Soldier and Soldier’swife for all these years.

“I told him, ‘I support you 100 percent,’ butmy heart dropped. It was a different worry.He’s still my baby,” Kate says. “I’m excited forhim … I think it’s a good thing.”

In her extra free minutes, Kate volunteersin the community. She has served as herkids’ schools as they were growing up. Shevolunteers for Aim for Excellence Founda-tion, Relay for Life, the Wounded WarriorRun and Extreme Home Makeover. She isalways looking for opportunities to get inand work on projects in the area – on andoff-base.

“I was taught from a young age that youhave to be involved in your community,” Kateexplains.


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For Kelly Hafer, life is not as much aboutthe challenges you’ve been dealt, but whatyou make of those challenges and the uniqueopportunities they bring with them.

Of course, she could have never guessedjust how many challenges and opportuni-ties that Navy life would bring her. As highschool sweethearts, Kelly and her husband,Bill, imagined all the adventures they wouldshare as a couple. Now, almost 20 years later,their family has grown by three children. Theyhave been through boot camp all the waythrough commissioning. They have traversedfour deployments and moved seven times, toboth coasts and the land in between. They’veseen so much of the world, but some of theirbiggest challenges started at home.

When Bill finished a deployment-filled seatour and received orders to Navy Postgradu-ate School, in Monterey, Calif., the coupledecided they were ready to pursue adoptinga second child – a milestone they had beenwaiting for years.

“I’m not leaving here with one child,”Kelly said. With only a two-year window inMonterey, the family had to act quickly. Theystarted the process immediately upon arrival.All three – Kelly, Bill, and their daughter –were excited about the new addition thatseemed right around the corner. But as theymoved through the paperwork, meetings,trainings and visits – the process grew slowerand slower.

“There is a lot of wait time,”Kelly explains, as they workedwith the state of California andthe foster care system. Eventu-ally, after months of yearningand waiting, the family wasmatched with two brothers.They would soon have sons.But not without more months ofcourt dates, appointments andwaiting. When the Hafer’s offi-

cially brought the boys home, they had ordersto move to Virginia a month later.

Adjusting from being a family of three to afamily of five is tough enough, without throw-ing a cross country move into the mix. Mean-while, as the family was getting to know eachother, Bill and Kelly noticed some strangebehaviors with their boys.

“My oldest son wasn’t making eye contact,”Kelly says. A few months later, they got thediagnosis – both boys are on the Autismspectrum.

The diagnosis left the newly transplantedfamily feeling a bit lost.

“When you get a diagnosis like that, thedoctors are like, ‘Here are some websites andbooks. Have a nice life!” Kelly explains. So shetook to the Internet to learn everything shecould. As a new mom to boys, a new mom toautistic kids and a newcomer to theHampton Roads area, Kelly foundcomfort, advice and a sense of direc-tion on the blogs she found.

“What kept me sane was bloggersthat were talking about real kids andfinding people who feel the sameway,” Kelly says.

Her experiences led Kelly todive headfirst into information andresource sharing for other militaryspouses – especially those with kidswith special needs. In addition to herown blog, UnplannedTriptoHolland.blogspot.com, Kelly writes regularlyfor mytidewatermoms.com to share

her experiences as a mom of autistic kids, amom of a teenager and a Navy wife. She hasalso contributed articles to a number of booksand newspapers.

Kelly also devotes time to the MilitarySpecial Needs Network, which is “an onlineeverything” for spouses of active duty mem-bers, whose kids have various forms of spe-cial needs. Through the website and socialnetworking, Kelly strives to let people knowof the resources available through the militaryand to keep them aware of the next steps theyneed to take.

“No one knocks on your door and tells youabout these programs – that’s what we try todo,” she says.

Kelly’s family is calling this year their “LostYear,” since her husband will be gone wellover two-thirds of it. And with a teenagedaughter who wants to maintain her sociallife and two boys who need a lot of attention,Kelly finds herself without much opportunity toattend support groups in the area.

“You have to embrace the lifestyle,” shesays. “You meet amazing people and seeamazing places.” And when things get reallydifficult, she encourages wives to find a placeto share resources and build a community ofsupport.


fusion C E N T E RS:


As an Air Force spouse, Toni Hall knowsthat working with a team – where every personcan contribute their talents and ability – isthe key to overall success. She believes that

volunteering with the skills youhave makes that work light.

“It’s easy for me,” shejokes. “I’m not out solv-ing world hunger.”

After being a military spousefor well over a decade, shesigned up to be a Key Spousefor her husband’s squadronin 2010. As a Key Spouse,Toni has spent a lot of timeorganizing squadron fund-

raisers, helping with social events, such asthe squadron’s fall “Trunk or Treat” and the“Commander’s Call.” She steps up when she’sneeded and looks for ways to get involved.

But because of the team of Key Spousesshe works with, Toni is able to focus on the

work that comes most naturally to her – stayingin communication with each spouse and familymember. Toni admits that the social events andprograms aren’t her strong suit, although thesuccess of such activities under her guidancemight say otherwise. Still, she points to herteam who step up to use their talents – fromevent coordination to web design – whichallows her to focus on what she loves most –direct communication with Airmen families.

Growing up as an Air Force child, herfamily faced their own tragic events. Theyexperienced the kind of knock-on-the-door days that no military family wants toface – yet those days are still a reality formilitary families. Toni is aware of that real-ity and holds it close to her heart.

“The only contact those families should


get shouldn’t be when they get that knockat the door,” Toni believes. She worksdiligently to stay in contact with families,during deployments and outside them aswell. She is acutely aware that difficult dayscan happen at any time – during an averagetraining mission, during a deployment, orduring just another day at work. She makesit her mission to ensure that families knowwhere they can turn if such a time occurs.

“My experience made me realize howvaluable those connections are,” Toni says.

It’s a lot of work to stay connected withall the families in a squadron of over 700Airmen, but knowing how important thatcontact is keeps Toni focused. Toni focusesfirst on families of deployed Airmen and newfamilies in the squadron, checking to see ifthey need anything, or need resources. Thenshe makes sure she stays in touch with allthe families so they know where to turn wheythey do need something. She uses phonecalls and emails, as well as social media, suchas Facebook, to stay up-to-date with every-one and check the pulse of the squadron.She also attends the social events on-baseand with the squadron to talk with spouses

and families. She also makes it a priority toencourage spouses to attend events on-base – to show support for those resources.

“I’m extremely empathetic for the thingsthat really count,” Toni explains. “And I’m reallygreat in an emergency.” Toni recalls oncean Airman and his family lost their home ina tornado. She went into full-coordinationmode – organizing child care, food, dona-tions and everything else the family needed.

Toni emphasizes, she couldn’tdo it all without her team of otherspouses. They allow her to focus onher family and community service aswell. In addition to volunteering ather children’s schools, at her churchand with Girl Scouts, Toni has twokids – a teenage son and 10-year-olddaughter. Toni works as a substituteteacher at her daughter’s school.

With the fullness of her calendar,Toni likes to focus on how lucky sheis as a military spouse. She alwaystries to remember what a blessing itis that her husband has a paycheck,relatively good health insurance, andthat she has the ability to serve where

she can. “Someone always has it worse,”Toni says, keeping things in perspective.

It’s that perspective that keepsher humble, and driven.

“The only reason I can do it all is that Ihave a phenomenal group of key spouses,”Toni says. “It’s very embarrassing that I wasnominated and they weren’t. It’s a teameffort. They deserve the recognition.”Shededicates the nomination to them.


Kristina Halleran finds a connection to herpast through her service to military families,Wounded Warriors and veterans.

“I am realizing how much effect that mili-tary life had on my childhood, even thoughwe were a civilian family,” Kristina says.

Kristina’s father is a Vietnam veteran, buthe got out of the military before Kristinawas born. She was raised in a civilianhome and her father never talked about hisexperiences as a service member. She re-members being raised to respect those inthe military and the work they do, but apartfrom that, she knew very little. Then at theage of 27, she met a Navy man. He stoleher heart and it became clear that militarylife, which she had never really known,would be hers.

“I knew it was a respectable job, but notmuch else,” Kristina says. “But he seemedlike someone I was supposed to know andmarry, and this was something I was sup-posed to do.”

In the first few years of her marriage,as she got to know modern military life,she started to learn more about her father,such as the Bronze Star he earned inVietnam.

“It’s all just come full circle,” she explains,as she her past and her future were il-luminated.

As a new military spouse, Kristina felt abit overwhelmed by it all.

“I didn’t know what it waslike to be a military wife, Ididn’t know what I was sup-posed to do, or how I wassupposed to act,” she says.“It was a learning experiencefor me. It was so very newto me. I had a lot to learn.” Inorder to learn more, Kristinagot involved in a number ofnon-profit organizations thatserve veterans and service

members. She enjoys learning about howthe military has and does effect families.As she put the pieces together for her life,she also learned so much about how themilitary effected her father and her family.

Her love for her father and her husbandhas led Kristina to focus so much of hertime on veterans service organizations.She started with an organization calledThe Mission Continues.

“These guys are built to serve ” Kristinaexplains. “The Mission Continues giveveterans a sense of purpose by servingtheir community.” Kristina also volunteerswith Wreaths Across America, BarrettTransitional Home for Women, VetHouseInc., and other local grassroots organiza-tion, but as involved as she was, it wasn’tenough until she learned about WoundedWear.

“I wanted to go deeper,” sheexplains. She wanted an opportu-nity to work directly with WoundedWarriors and their families andhelp them in immediate and tan-gible ways. Wounded Wear givesher that opportunity.

“They go directly to the hospitalsand modify clothing for WoundedWarriors,” she says. With thisorganization, Kristina has found herplace.

“The first time I went to WalterReed was one of the most difficultdays of my life,” Kristina admits. “I

came home emotionally exhausted.” But itwas worth it for Kristina and she returns asoften as she can.

Wounded Wear is based in HamptonRoads, allowing Kristina to be as involvedas she wants. As one of five main volun-teers for the organization, she finds herselfwearing many different hats, although herofficial title is event coordinator.

“It’s very family oriented,” she says. “Thekids are often at the office with us.”

Such a flexible arrangement is perfectfor Kristina as her husband is underway,or deployed often. With two little ones,aged seven and five, her schedule is reallyhectic.

“It difficult and stressful,” she admits.“But you just do it.” She tells the story be-ing geographically away from her husbandfor over two years, as his last duty stationkept the family apart.

“I’m not a morning person,” she laughs.“But I had to get up with the kids everymorning.”

Kristina keeps her focus on militaryservice members as they come home withphysical and invisible scars.

“That’s the angle that I’ve taken to sup-port my husband,” Kristina says. Servingthem brings clarity to her past and herpresent.


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According to Christina Lara, there is“never a dull moment” in her life. With threegrowing boys (ages 6, 9 and 12) and ahusband who serves in the Navy and oftendeploys, Christina is constantly on the go.Keeping up with everyone’s schedules is adaily juggling act.

If home life wasn’t busy enough, Christinahas taken on enough to completely overflowthe pages of her calendar. She is on thescholarship board for Navy Wives Clubsof America. She volunteers as an ombuds-man for two different Navy commands – theUSS New York (LPD 21) and Navy RegionMid-Atlantic. Her resume has also includedPTA president, den mother for her boys’scouting groups and SPCA volunteer. Andshe goes to school full-time, expecting toreceive her Master’s degree in psychologythis December.

The key to her sanity? “My calendar ismy best friend,” Christina says. She atteststhat as long as she can stay organizedand ahead of her own busy schedule, shenot only gets everything done, but enjoysstaying involved in so many things. In fact,that’s her key to success as a militaryspouse.

“Fill your day with what you love doing,”she advises other military spouses. And allthe volunteering is one thing she loves to do.

Taking on one ombudsman role is quitean intimidating undertaking for many – but

Christina has taken on two!“I absolutely love helping

families,” she explains. “I felt sohelpless when we got started.I love giving back.”

Giving back takes up a lot ofher time. As a command om-budsman for two commands,Christina spends a lot of timeon the phone and computer –staying in touch with spouses

and families. She says she closes all of heremails with a reminder that she doesn’t have“9 to 5 business hours” and is availablewhenever families need her.

“Things break before and after businesshours,” she says. “If you need to call at 2a.m. because there is a noise outside, that’sfine. We are in this together.”

Christina recognizes that family andfriends outside the military don’t alwaysunderstand the unique challenges presentedin the military life. She knows how importantit is to build relationships within the Navy,among people you do understand.

Of course, her own family is first on hercalendar.

“The boys are a priority,” Christina says.“But they are so resilient. They know whenmom needs to take a call.”

Still, Christina spends much ofher time with them, volunteeringwith their activities and interests.She loves being involved with theirCub and Boy Scout troops, when-ever she can.

“It’s so much fun watching theboys learn with the other kids,”Christina says. “Doing stuff I neverdid as a kid.”

She also devotes time to playboth roles when their dad isdeployed. One of her recommen-dations is to use email to facilitatecommunication among the deployedservice member and the kids. She

encourages her boys to share their concernsand struggles with growing up via emailwith their dad, while she also uses emailto communicate with him and ensures thateveryone is on the same page with how todeal with daily challenges.

“It’s the psychology kicking in,” she says,regarding her resourcefulness for figuringout unique ways to have family discussions.

As her education has played such a rolein her life, Christina has committed herselfto helping others achieve their academicgoals. On the board of the scholarship fundfor Navy Wives Clubs of America, she workswith various club chapters and reviews doz-ens of scholarships from Navy, Marine Corpsand Coast Guard dependents to choose 30winners each year.

She also stays involved with the localSPCA by keeping a box on her doorstepwhere neighbors and friends dispensenewspapers, which she delivers to the ani-mal shelter. It’s just another way she keepsher calendar full.

But above all, she does everything for thelove of her boys – especially her husband.

“He is a seafaring Sailor. He absolutelyloves the water and now my boys love thewater,” she says. “Every time he puts on thatuniform, I think ‘that’s my Sailor.’”


Sara Jane Arnett has her sights set on servingpeople—beginning through her role as founderand leader of a Family Readiness Group for herhusband’s Army unit. Recognized for her tirelesssupport to military families, she was namedHeroes at HomeMilitary Spouse of the Year andrecipient of Regent’s prestigious PresidentialScholarship. Now a student in the organizationalleadership program, Sara Jane encourages othermilitary spouses: “Go for it! ... I was always askingmyself, ‘How can I be a better leader?’ Now, I’mbecoming one—in my community and for theglobal marketplace.” Eager to support your hero athome? Discover Regent’s military spouse benefitsand flexible degree programs.

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Rachel Tipton considers her husband’ssquadron her family. And she works hardto ensure that every service member andfamily member feels the same way.

She looks for places of need and steps

up to make sure everyonefeels welcome, appreciated,and taken care of. When herhusband joined his currentsecurity forces squadron, shenoticed that there was noKey Spouse program. Sherealized that families neededa place to turn for support,encouragement and social-

izing. She also noticed that more couldbe done to support Airman before, during,and after their overseas deployments. Shestepped up to be the squadron’s first andonly Key Spouse. She formed the programat the squadron from the ground up.

While getting in touch with all the families

of the squadron and assessing the needs,she built the Key Spouse program up to eightspouses. With her team of Key Spouses,Rachel coordinates squadron events, suchas Christmas parties, military balls, andHails and Farewells. Not only does shemake sure the events happen, but she alsoorganizes childcare so that everyone canattend. For the squadron’s most recentball, Rachel organized dress donations soevery woman could afford a new-to-them,beautiful gown. Another time, she droppedeverything to help a spouse with financialissues – even going to the grocery store forher until the monetary issues could be sortedout. She also stays in communication withthe Airman Readiness Center to be aware

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of all resources available to the families andcommunicates with the spouses on a regularbasis to ensure everyone is well cared for.

In communicating with the families, Rachelassesses the needs of everyone and looksfor ways to help. A few years ago, when shelearned that a number of the single Airmen didnot have childcare options for their children,Rachel stepped up and offered to watch thechildren herself – with little to no cost to theAirman. She didn’t want to make money fromthe experience – she just wanted to take aload of the minds of the Airmen and assurethem that their children were taken care of.

Rachel is equally concerned for thewell-being of the children in the squadron.She wants them to feel loved and appreci-ated too, as they sacrifice time with theirparents during deployments and long workdays. She coordinates special parties for thechildren, gotten them together to make andsend cards to their deployed parents, andput together face painting stands at familyday events. Rachel knows that the healthof the squadron starts at home and shemakes sure the whole family are cared for.

Her concern, of course, starts at home with

the health of her own family and children. Bothof Rachel’s young children suffer from illness.With countless doctors appointments, inbetween school days and other activities, Ra-chel’s schedule is always full. She keeps hercalendar with her at all times and consults withit whenever she needs to set an appointmentor agrees to do something for the squadron.

With her own personal illness to care for,Rachel is careful to take care of herself aswell – after the family and squadron.

“That’s where my wonderfulhusband comes in,” Rachel says.“Even with his busy job, he helpsme too. On his days off – if I havesomething going, he will say ‘I’lltake care of that,’ or he will tellme to go get my nails done.”

Rachel’s family raised her to bethe way she is. From an early age,her mom referred to her as a “littlemama,” as Rachel has always lookedfor ways to take care of others.

Whether she is coordinatinga homecoming event to makesure Airmen feel appreciated,or buying extra food items when

they are on sale, her resourcefulnessand forward-thinking help Rachel carefor others creatively and consistently.

When others ask her how she doesit, she just shrugs and smiles.

“I like to be busy,” Rachel says. “It getsmy mind off him when he’s away.” And sheloves seeing others happy, which is why shesteps up so often to lead volunteer efforts.“I just do it. I don’t hesitate – I just go.”

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Amber Winters believes that focusingon the needs of other people is the key tonavigating military life. It’s a focus she learnedfrom her father and grandmother – bothinfluential in forming her into the thoughtfulperson she is.

“They molded me into the person I am,”Amber says. “They taught me that you takecare of people.”

And that’s exactly Amber’s mission in hervolunteer work – both inside and outsideNavy life. She strives to ensure people feelincluded and heard. More than a volunteer,she’s a family-builder.

As high school sweethearts, Amber andher husband, Loren, had often talked aboutthe Navy. When their daughter was born witha number of medical problems, they put thedecision on hold.

“When she was two or three, we decidedit was time,” Amber says. They moved fromtheir hometown to Hampton Roads, with theiryoung daughter. For her first few years as aNavy spouse, Amber knew very few people– focusing all her time on her daughter. Shelearned quickly the frustration of an isolatedlife.

“Those first years, I was completely drainedwhen my husband would get home,” Amberexplaines.

That’s when Amber realized she neededto find her own community. At her husband’ssecond duty station, she heard the command

was forming a Family ReadinessGroup.

“I decided to get involvedbecause I didn’t want anyone tofeel the way I felt,” Amber says.Soon, she was the FRG’s vice-president. And soon after that,she served as an ombudsman.Amber finally felt the sense ofbelonging she had yearnedfor – and determined to make ither goal to help others find that

same family.Amber loves being involved with the ships

and commands where her husband is sta-tioned. Recognizing the importance of having afamily network, she encourages the commandfamilies and spouses to call her anytime – dayor night.

“I try to be as approachable as possible,”Amber explains. Having been surrounded by atight network and having struggled alone, sheknows how much better it is when you havepeople you can rely on. She recounted howmuch easier it was once she found friends –even to just watch her daughter, who can’t beexposed to colds or the flu, while she ran to thegrocery store.

That tight knit community also allows Amberto focus on volunteering outside of the Navy.Her daughter, Hannah, received a kidneytransplant at St. Louis Children’sHospital, which means Amber andHannah have to travel back to Mis-souri at least twice a year, even whileher husband is deployed.

“Even just to have people to feedHannah’s guinea pig,” Amber recog-nized, is such an important part oftheir Navy family.

While Hannah was receiving hertransplant, Amber remained commit-ted to the families around her at thehospital. When the hospital created aparent advisory board, they asked herto chair it, knowing how tactfully andcompassionately she could communi-

cate between parents and staff.Now living in Virginia full-time, Amber helps

the hospital through phone meetings, butfocuses much of her time on her daughter’sspecial needs classroom.

“I cant put into words, but it’s the simplestthings the kids appreciate most,” Amberexplained.

Amber is also the team mom for Hannah’sspecial needs cheerleading team at their localgym. She works tirelessly to ensure everyonefeels valued and a part of the team. When sheisn’t busy with FRG, classroom, cheerleading,and other community volunteering, Amber isout at Special Olympics events.

“As a Navy wife, it’s rewarding to serveNavy families, but Hannah is a big part of mylife. If it weren’t for Hannah, I wouldn’t realizehow much I can do for special needs com-munity,” Amber explained,

Amber encourages all military spouses tostrike a similar balance. She found out person-ally that getting involved with the commandoffers a unique family that understands yourschedule, frustrations and daily life.

Looking back on her experiences as a Navywife, and ahead to the adventures to come,Amber is grateful for the lessons from herfather and grandmother, who ensured sheknew how to care for others and think outsideherself.


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They warn you about all the moving. Theyremind you to stay organized because youwill have to pack up all your belongings ona regular basis. They paint visions of all thethings you will do, and see, and experience.

But what they – everyone commentingon your life as a military spouse – don’t tellyou is just how random your experienceswill be! Most of us have used the phrase “I

should write a book” at least once because,frankly, we probably could. Our spousesdeploy, Murphy’s Law kicks in, and suddenlywe find ourselves picking up a new trade asa plumber, or electrician, or technician. Wemove to the worst school district in Americaand suddenly become teachers to a house-hold full of kids. We go to one meeting atthe squadron and now we are running to the

spouse organization. We get stuck with acertain set of neighbors and suddenly weare learning the intricacies of drug interven-tions, or take Lamaze classes in case we areneeded as backup.

And that doesn’t even include employ-ment. How many of us have taken obscurejobs because we just wanted to be working?In my early years as a Navy wife, I found my-

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self scouring journalism textbooks after taking a job as a lead reporterat a newspaper, developing my own grammar curriculum at a tutoringcenter that specialized in math, and swimming through the abyss ofthe Internet to find educationally appropriate material for children fora software company? The jobs I applied for, and didn’t get, could fill avolume themselves.

But lest we take curl up with our randomly accumulated experiencesand sulk in our own frustration that our lives do not pave a well-laidpath to success, let’s take a moment to appreciate those experiences.Like pieces of pottery that make a mosaic, those moments of creativity,ingenuity and utter perseverance meld together to create our personalbrand.

Amy Schofield found this to be true as she reviewed her educationin human resources and her work experience in recruitment, volunteermanagement and administration. She realized she knew all about thehiring process from the inside and could help others as they navigatedthose waters. Rather than holding out for a new administrative positionevery time she moved, Amy started a business as a virtual assistant,www.schofieldstrategies.com – specializing in custom resumes andcover letters.

“My favorite aspect of my business is playing a role in furthering thelives of other military spouses by writing stand-out resumes for them!”Amy says.

Amanda Rinker, a freelance writer and editor (www.amandarinker.com), found that working from home allowed her the full-time flexibil-ity she wanted, while showcasing her unique balancing abilities as amilitary spouse.

“As a military spouse you learn to be flexible through deployments,field trainings and everything else that’s thrown at you, so juggling mul-tiple clients has become second nature to me too,” Amanda explains.

Kate O’Connor also found that the military lifestyle actually helpedher build a brand, rather than lose one. Kate started Kate’s Thoughtsfor Food (www.katesthoughtsforfood.com), a fresh-food, meal-plan-ning service.

“Rather than focusing on the fact that my dreams would not beattainable because of my husband’s military career, I was forced toget creative and figure out a way to translate my love of cooking into abusiness that could function anywhere,” Kate says. “The simple truth isthat my brand would not exist if I wasn’t a military wife. Starting my ownbusiness gave me the opportunity to create my own identity.”

That’s the beauty of entrepreneurship and the military lifestyle. Weare so used to carving out our own identity, constantly introducingourselves to new groups of people, that evolving that into a brand isalmost seamless once we settle on the type of business we want.

“Your name and reputation are some of the only constants youcarry around as a military spouse,” said Patty Jones, owner of www.lit-tlepatpats.com. “When you have to pack up everything you own everyfew years and start fresh, having a business and a brand that moveswith you is a huge advantage.”

The next time you think about the mosaic of experiencesthe military has given you, and you consider writing abook, pull out a pen and paper and start writing. Youmay just discover a hidden business in all thatcracked pottery.


Kate Dunbar

I found a long time ago that you need to getout there and integrate yourself into yournew community as soon as you can. Findan activity or organization that makes youhappy and get involved with it. Nothing isharder than coming to a new area and notknowing anyone – making friends is apriority. The same applies to our children.Every time we move, my sons and I will walkthe new neighborhood in search of parentsand children who are outside. Then weintroduce ourselves, tell them we are new tothe area, and then we begin a conversation

about what activities there are to do in thearea, who their dentist is, good local eatingspots, etc ... it is a great icebreaker and agreat way to meet neighbors and makefriends.

Christina Lara

As a child I loved, and still enjoy with myboys, the movie “The Wizard of Oz”. As amilitary wife, I live by the words of “followthe yellow brick road.” For on this road, youwill find your brain, your courage, your heartand always ... “there is no place like home,”no matter where we go. I know that is not

really words of wisdom, but in essence,there are times when we are asked to thinkoutside the box (the brain), take care of ourfamily when our loved ones are deployed(the nerve), meet new people and makenew friends (a heart), but always when weare PCS’d, we make our house into a home... There is no place like home!

Alisa Baldwin

I have two pieces of advice:First, we all understand that moving as oftenas we do can be difficult for establishingfriendships. However, those friendships areimportant. Besides social media, a spousecan volunteer her time either on-base orsome other organization. There are so manyopportunities. This not only brings a senseof giving back, but also opens up opportuni-ties for friendships.Second, put every tool in your tool-beltpossible! What I mean by that is to beprepared with those little things that willmake a big difference when your spouse is

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training, out in the field, or on deployment.Take the deployment list the military givesyou and take it a step further! Who will youcall if your car breaks down? How will thecar be towed? I know that USAA offers atowing benefit for a reasonable price for autoinsurance customers. That one thing canmake a huge difference when you are onyour own! Be creative with those tools.During my husband’s last deployment, I tookmy laptop out to the garage and via Skypehe walked me through the steps to fix thelawn mower! Know that there will be somethings that are unpredictable. Last summerwhile my husband was deployed, I ended uphaving surgery. It wasn’t easy without myhusband here! Those are the unpredictablethings. Know that they will happen and as Ialways tell my kids, “This too shall pass.”

Amber Winters

My life has been influenced the most by twopeople in my life that have both gone tooHeaven. My father and my grandmother

taught me that you always put your familyfirst and that people who come into your lifeat different times can become a part of yourfamily. They both inspired me with their kindhearts. As a military wife, these two simplepieces of wisdom couldn’t be more valuable.My husband and I were married seven yearsprior to him joining the Navy. I could not be aprouder military spouse. So, I have learnedthat as a military spouse you need to be a“supportive” spouse. This has allowed ourmarriage to continue to grow, and for myhusband to feel confident in his Navy career,knowing that I stand beside him even whenhe is overseas. As his wife, I will always putour family first and remember to be openminded to the people who come into our lifethrough his Navy career. You will find familysometimes in people you may not haveexpected. This support system will bringconfidence and support to all of us asmilitary spouses. So, like my father andgrandmother did, I will always support myspouse, put my family first and continue tobuild my family as I go along in life.

Toni Hall

Military spouses are unique. We do thingswe never thought we could, go places wenever thought we would and handle morethan we ever thought we could. And all of itis easier if we realize we aren’t alone. Often,our husbands and wives are gone, but thereare other spouses who have been where youare, or are experiencing the same separationwith you. So don’t think you are alone – askfor help if you need it, get involved, or helpsomeone else if they need it. That’s whatfamily does and that’s what we are!

Sandy Barker

Stay Busy. This is key to getting throughdeployments. Get involved in community,military support groups, kids and school,volunteer, etc. There are so many organiza-tions who could use a helping hand and itmakes you feel good about yourself. Supportyour service member, it’s just as hard on

- continued on page 29

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A sensitive touch for females of all ages


Join us in honoring our unsung heroes for their sacrifices, their strengths and their commitment to our community. The Heroes at Home Military Spouse of the Year was chosenfrom the nominees below, whose nominations were provided by active duty personnel from all branches of the military, spouse support groups, charitable organizations, friends and family.

Aja Christine Ferguson • SSG Andrew James Ferguson, Joint Base Langley-EustisAlisa Baldwin • SSG Christopher Baldwin, Joint Base Langley-EustisAmanda SelkirkAmber Benton • E4 Michael Benton, USCG Station Cape CharlesAmber Clark • E5 Shawn Clark, JEB Little Creek-Fort Story EOD ESU2Amber Sheffield • E-5 Robert Sheffield, Helicopter Sea Combat Squadron Two TwoAmber Winters • LS2 Loren Winters, Naval Special Warfare Development GroupAmy Fattizzi • E6 Anthony T. Fattizzi, JEB Little Creek-Fort StoryAmy Hale • MSGT William Hale, Joint Base Langley-EustisAmy McAllister • CAPT Eric McAllister, Joint Base Langley-EustisAngelicque C. Hoffman • E5 Justen A. Mallard, CubaAnna J. RossAshley Wilder • E4 Joshua Wilder, Naval Station NorfolkBeth Royle • CMDR Michael Royle, Naval Station Norfolk; Carrier Strike Group 8Bre Kingsbury • LCDR John Kingsbury , NAS Oceana Dam Neck AnnexCarrie McCann • E4 James McCann, USAG GrafenwoehrCassandra Bean • E3 Robert Bean, Naval Station NorfolkCelerina Gagni • LT COL Clarence Gagni, Joint Base Langley-EustisChristina Lara • PO1 Pablo Lara, USS New York (LPD 21)Christina Rowley • E6 David Rowley, Naval Medical Center PortsmouthChristine Douglas • E7 Chief Machinist’s Mate Monty Ray Douglas (ret.), Naval WeaponsStation YorktownChristine Wilson • CAPT Craig Wilson, Joint Task Force Civil Support (JTF-CS)Christy Pollman • GSMC Adam Pollman, COMNAVSURFLANTCody RileyCynthia Veronica Anguiano • E4 Francisco Anguiano, USS Dwight D Eisenhower (CVN 69)Denielle Haack • SSG David Haack, 1 CMS/MXMCFEla Kelly • E5 Okpara Kelly, NAS OceanaErika PilarErin Voirol • SFC Dale Voirol, Fort Bragg, NCEuNiece TurkFrancis • 1ST LT Bryan Turkfrancis, Joint Base Langley-EustisFelicity Johnson • W01 Desmond Johnson, Joint Base Langley-EustisHeather Ownby • E5 Orvil Ownby, Patrol Coastal Crew HOTELHeidi Schmidt • LT Paul Schmidt, Naval Medical Center PortsmouthJacquie McCall • LT COLMichael C. McCall, Joint Base Langley-EustisJamie Rose • E4 Brandon Rose, 94th AMUJanelle R. Perez • E7 Kristopher Perez , USS Albany (SSN 753)Jennifer Danielle Squazza • LTJG Naval Flight Officer Andre F. SquazzaJennifer Gangemi • MSGT Joseph Gangemi, HQ ACC IGJennifer Rogers • MSGT John Rogers, Joint Base Langley-EustisJessica RiggsJill Williams • E3 George Williams, JEB Little Creek-Fort StoryJoanna Schranz • LCDR Craig Schranz, Naval Medical Center PortsmouthJoBeth Hilliard • E5 Shane Hilliard, Joint Base Langley-Eustis

Julie Hess • AOC Nicholas Hess, USS Theodore Roosevelt (CVN 71)Kandy Fisk • LT Michael Fisk, JEB Little Creek-Fort StoryKathryn Dunbar • LTC Layton Dunbad, 24th Transportation BattalionKatie Nelson • E5 Keith Neslon, USCG Station Cape CharlesKelly D. Young • LT Andrew F. Young, Navy Cyber Forces CommandKelly Hafer • LT William Hafer, USS Mitscher (DDG 57)Kelly Torres • HM1 Julian Torres, Riverine Squadron OneKristen ShortridgeKristina Halleran • E6 James Halleran, CID Learning Site Dam NeckKrystal Ann Chapman • SPC Krystal Chapman, 567 ICTCKrystle Lein • E5 Kenneth Lein, JEB Little Creek-Fort StoryLea Fabian • E3 Zachary Fabian, USS Enterprise (CVN 65)Macie FerrellMeagan M. Massey • SGT John Massey, 10th Mountain Brigade, Fort Drum, NYMeeghan Griffin • E7 Nathaniel Griffin, Assault Craft Unit FourMelissa Musella • BM1 John MusellaMelissa Visage • E6 Eric Visage, NAS Oceana Dam Neck AnnexMichelle L Kehoe • E9 James M. Kehoe, 158FW/DET 1Misty Menken • E5 David Menken, Joint Base Langley-EustisOdemaris Avila • E6 Justin Avila, NavyRachael Trussell • E6 Ira Trussell, Assault Craft Unit FourRachel Hicks • E7 Jacob Hicks, USS Harry S. Truman (CVN 75)Rachel Tipton • TSGT Jeffrey Tipton, 633 Security Forces SquadronRebecca Bryant Wellintington • E4 Blaine Wellington, NavySandy Barker • MCPO Blair Barker, USS George H.W. Bush(CVN 77)Santina Rivera • CMDR Richard Rivera, NAS OceanaSara Merkel • LT COL Jack Merkel, NavySarah Clark • E6 Jeremy Clark, NAS OceanaSarah E. PianaltoSelena Arnold • Petty Officer 2nd Class Robert Arnold, USS Donald Cook (DDG 75)Shannon A. Dawson • BM1 James Ryan Dawson, USCGShannon Jefferson • E6 Ernist Jefferson, USS Enterprise (CVN 65)Shelley Federico • Joe Federico, Naval Station NorfolkShenetta Whitfield • E6 Reginald Whitfield, USS Newport News (SSN 750)Sunny Rydl • E6, NCTAMS LANTSusan Doyle • Petty Officer 2nd Class Benjamin Doyle, USS Jason Dunham (DDG 109)Sylvia L. Mallari • MSGT Darwin P. Mallari, 1 AMXS-27 AMUTanya Henley • Keith HenleyTerri Short • Senior Chief Joey Short, BahrainTiffany Harris • E4 Kyle A. Harris, NavyTina Thoele • LT COL Dan Thoele, MARFORCOMToni E. Hall • CMSGT Ronald S. Hall, Jr., 30th Intelligence SquadronWendy Stump • E4 Zachary Stump, Naval Station NorfolkYuko Hall • E6 Jason Hall, NAS Oceana Oceana/VFA-31


them as it is you. Get out of the house, you’dbe amazed how much better you feel! Makefriends with other military spouses, theyunderstand what you’re going throughbetter than anyone and we can all use a littlesupport. Most importantly, make a life foryourself, while still being committed to yourspouse. Get a job, go back to school,volunteer, and exercise.

Kelly Hafer

Being the parent of a special needs child ismuch like being a military spouse. To get themost out of your experience you mustembrace the lifestyle. There are times whenthe life you live may not be exactly what youonce hoped, but throw yourself in the deepend and make it work – learn the lingo, findthe resources and share your knowledge.

Susan Doyle

Embrace this wild journey that your spouse

has chosen for their current career. Do notthink of it as their journey alone and yourselfa tag-along, but instead embrace this life asa team. Discover interests, hobbies andcommunity service opportunities that youare best suited for. In the words of AlbertEinstein, “Only a life lived for others is a lifeworth while.” You will be most satisfied withthis military life when you are actively caringfor others. Go to bed tired every night, neverwaste a days worth of energy! Additionally,get connected with other military spouses.Find a military spouse willing to mentor andencourage you, someone who puts theirfamily first, has a solid marriage and whoserves others. Know that your family’sservice to this country may require someflexibility on your part, but with this oftencomes great opportunity. Things may not goas planned. You may face unexpecteddeployments, PCS moves and more, butknow that your inconveniences, althoughfrustrating at times, play a role in the overallmission. Lastly, be proud of yourself! You willfind you are stronger than you ever could

have imagined!

Kristina Halleran

Be ready for challenges and embrace them.Whatever comes your way that is difficultwill make you stronger. The kids are also alot tougher than you think. Turn to yourmilitary family when no other is around (Ilearned this so much this year!) Volunteer,when you can, for a veteran-based or anynon-profit in your community, it will give youa whole new prospective to view so manythings.

Rachel Tipton

I tell other military wives to not give up andkeeping moving forward, that Godwouldn’t give you something you couldn’thandle. If you need anything else, pleaselet me know.

- continued from page 27

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Heroes at Home 2012

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