Curb whining with a Gotcha! gameIf your child constantly whines about the latest gizmo she needs, try playing this Gotcha! game:• Explain needs vs. wants. “We

need things like food and water. We want things like toys and skateboards.”

• Call her out. Whenever she starts fussing about something she needs that’s really a want, say, “Gotcha!”

• Let her play, too. Allow her to shout “Gotcha!” anytime she catches you complaining about a new outfit or gadget you need.

Source: T. Reece, “Dollars & Sense,” Parents, May 2012, Meredith.

Discipline with praiseYou’re tired of nagging. You’ve even tried reasoning. Nothing seems to work when disciplining your child. To end misbehavior, use praise to encourage desired behavior instead. Remember to:• Make your praise specific.• Reinforce praise with a smile.• Use praise immediately following

the desired behavior.In other words, catch your child being good—and she just might make it a habit!Source: “Praise a Child Right, and You’ll Get Results,” U.S. News & World Report, http://health.usnews.com/health-news/blogs/on-parenting/2008/02/04/praise-a-child-right-and-youll-get-results.

Copyright © 2012, The Parent Institute®, www.parent-institute.com

October 2012

Parents Guiding Students for School Success

®

Help your child develop ‘character’ Parents want their children’s “character” to be admirable. But what exactly does that mean? And how can you promote your child’s character development? Consider focusing on these traits:• Trustworthiness. Emphasize the importance

of meaning what you say when you’ve made a commitment. “Let’s go see Grandpa. I prom-ised we’d visit today. He’s counting on us!”

• Respect. Make the “Golden Rule” a family rule. Discuss what it means to treat others as you would like to be treated. Look for examples in everyday life.

• Responsibility. Enforce fair rules and give your child age-appropriate jobs. Highlight the rewards of hard work. “We’ve finished cleaning up. Now you can invite your friends to come over!”

• Caring. Consider other people’s feelings and needs. “Johnny is sad because he hasn’t had a turn. Let’s share the ball with him.” “Today we’re going to collect canned goods for the food drive.”

• Fairness. When you play games, talk about the rules. Why are they important? What if there were no rules? Would life be more fun—or more difficult?

• Citizenship. Find ways to contribute to your school and community, such as volunteering at an event. Read and tell stories about others who have made a difference.

Source: “Tips for Parents,” Character Counts! http://charactercounts.org/pdf/Parents-TipSheet.pdf.

Is your child taking a class that was difficult for you when you were in school? Instead of showing your dislike for it (“Ugh, science ... I was awful at it!”), be positive. “That experiment looks like it’s going to be fun!” Experts say that when you are encouraging, your child will feel better and accomplish more. You may even change your own mind about a subject or two!Source: National Science Teachers Association, “Help Your Child Explore Science,” www.nsta.org/portals/parents/explore2.aspx.

Prevent bullying on social-media sitesMillions of kids have social-media accounts—and they’re often targeted by predators and cyberbullies. If your child has an account, here are some things you can do to keep him from being an online target:• “Friend” him so you can moni-

tor his activity.• Maintain strict privacy settings.• Insist that he only “friend”

people he actually knows.Source: “Facebook & Your Privacy,” Consumer Reports, June 2012, Consumer Reports.

Q: We’ve never been very good about routines at our house,

but I’m starting to see that we need them. How can I use

routines to bring some order to my child’s chaotic days?

A: Congratulations on seeing the light! Routines are excellent for

making family life run more smoothly—especially during the jam-

packed school year. If you’ve never relied on routines before, here’s

how you can start adopting them:

1. Assess the situation. When do things run well at your house?

And when do the wheels come off the

wagon? Take a look at your daily life and

pinpoint which times are completely frantic.

They’re probably the periods that would

benefit most from routines.

2. Set a goal. Once you’ve identified the

problem areas, choose just one to focus

on at first. For example, if school mornings

are always frenzied, consider starting there. “My goal is to make

before-school time less stressful for me and my child.”

3. Devise a plan. Write down the steps to your new routine and

share them with your child. “We always race to make the school

bus, so the first thing we’re going to do is start waking up 10

minutes earlier.” Then add steps to make breakfast and getting-

dressed time more efficient, too.

4. Be patient. Your home won’t become a well-oiled machine over-

night. So be realistic with your expectations. Routines will make

your days more manageable, but they’re not magic. Like every-

thing else related to parenting, they require time, commitment

and patience.

Make homework less stressful for your childDoes your child come unglued at homework time? To reduce stress:• Check her backpack as soon as

she gets home. That way, there won’t be any surprises about what’s due tomorrow.

• Let her unwind. Don’t make her hit the books the second she walks in the door from school.

• Build in breaks. If she’s tackling a big assignment, have her take a breather every so often.

Source: C. Kowalczyk, M.Ed., “Homework Headaches: How to Reduce Stress and Frustration between Parents and Children,” Horizons Developmental Resource Center, www.horizonsdrc.com/blog/homework-headaches.

Review school discipline policies as soon as possibleThe best time to read the school’s discipline policy isn’t when a child gets in trouble. It’s before any trouble occurs! Make sure you have a copy. With your child:• Review rights and responsibilities. Talk about what’s expected of

students at school, such as being on time and being respectful. What’s not allowed? Emphasize that you support the school’s rules.

• Learn about discipline procedures. If you have questions, contact the school. When parents understand discipline guidelines, they don’t just prepare for problems. They prevent them—and promote safe learning for everyone.

Source: “A Parent’s Guide To Understanding Student Discipline Policies and Practices In Virginia Schools,” Virginia Department of Education, www.doe.virginia.gov/support/student_conduct/parents_guide_student_discipline_policies.pdf.

Firm, Fair & Consistent®

Guiding Students for School Success Publisher: John H. Wherry, Ed.D.

Editor: Erika Beasley.Writers: Susan O’Brien, Holly Smith.

Illustrations: Maher & Mignella, Cherry Hill, NJ.Copyright © 2012, The Parent Institute®, a division of NIS, Inc.

P.O. Box 7474, Fairfax Station, VA 22039-7474 1-800-756-5525

www.parent-institute.com • ISSN 1541-437X

Copyright © 2012, The Parent Institute®, www.parent-institute.com

October 2012®

Help your ADHD child stay organized Lots of kids struggle to stay organized. But if your child has ADHD, getting organized may be that much harder. To help your child keep his school things straight:• Get a multi-compartment back-

pack. He can store specific items in each section.

• Make labeled folders or bins. He can put current assignments in one and completed papers in another.

• Use sticky notes. Show your child how to post important reminders where he’ll see them.

Source: “School Organization 101: Clutter-Free Backpacks and Bedrooms,” ADDitudemag.com, www.additudemag.com/adhd/article/1038.html.

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