Habits to Live By -...
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Habits to Live By
A Virtual Personal Development
Course
Adapted from Stephen Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People
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Habits to Live By
• Welcome to the Woodson Center’s Neighborhood Leadership Development Institute On-Line (www.cneonline.org) .
• This time series training and development course is for community and faith based organizational leaders.
• The course is designed to provide development in three areas: personal, organizational, and community.
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• Each program curriculum track has several workshops that are presented using social media to include GoToMeetings.
• Each program curriculum track may be recorded and placed on the WC’s web site for viewing in the convenience of your home or office. The address is www.woodsoncenter.org.
• Participants will be able to get Continuing Education Units for each workshop.
• Please complete the SurveyMonkey at the end of each module.
Habits to Live By
• Tools you will need in this course:
– Access to a computer and the internet.
– Approximately 1 hour of time availability to
attend once a week online sessions and
participate in the virtual dialogue.
– We hope that you have been taking copius
notes on the training in your composition
book.
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• As of today, we have been discussing
Personal Development.
• This track has three components: Habits
to Live By, Career Development, and
Financial Literacy.
• This is the seventh session on Habits to
Live By which is adapted from the work of
7 Habits of Highly Effective People by
Stephen Covey.
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• 7 Habits of Highly Effective People
represent a holistic, integrated approach to
personal and interpersonal effectiveness.
• The real beauty of the Habits lies in the
relationship among the habits and how
those habits positively impact individuals,
their co-workers, family and community.
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• In Part I, we defined a habit as: where Knowledge, Skill, and Desire intersect.
• We want to be principle-centered Leaders.
• That is, leaders who set the tone and bring
a balance between character and
competence.
• Leaders challenge their mindsets as they
impact perceptions about others.
Habits to Live By
• In Part 2—Habit 1-- BE PROACTIVE. You
are The Creator; you are in charge.
• Use our self-awareness and imagination to
visualize beyond experience and present
reality—The Creator
• Make decisions that align with our values.
• Focus on our Circle of Influence.
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• Part 3--Habit 2- Begin with the End in Mind
you crystalize your self image using your
imagination to create the end you desire.
• Develop a personal mission statement and
personal goals, the foundation for
developing a plan for our lives.
• Now we can focus on results; know where
we want to be and when we have arrived;
give meaning and purpose to what we do.
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• Part 4—Habit 3--Put First Things First
• We explored the aspects of our lives to
identify what was most important to us.
• We learned that scheduling priorities is a
skill with outcomes that exceed our
imagination.
• We examined how to address important
matters that are not yet urgent to minimize
the number of crises– Put first things first.
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• Part 5—Habit 4--Think Win/Win seeks to
find mutual benefit that serves all parties.
• Win/Win—Brings Personal Leadership
qualities into relationships, i.e., principle-
centered character values of integrity,
maturity and the abundance mentality.
• It draws upon the Emotional Bank Account
based on trust to enter into Agreements
that allow all parties to Win/Win. WC NLDI Online 11
• Part 6—Habit 5--Seek First to
Understand… then Seek to Be
Understood” which seeks to be effective
communicators.
• We learned the skill of Empathic
Listening—that is, listening with our heart,
hearing the words, but, also capturing the
feelings and body language without
probing, interpreting or evaluating. WC NLDI Online 12
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• Habit 6: Synergize – The Habit of
“Creative Cooperation”
– This habit aims to value the differences in
others; build on strengths of the members of
the group and compensate for their
weaknesses.
– Win-Win and Empathic Listening are two key
attributes to Creative Cooperation
Habits to Live By
• When we value our differences and seek
mutual benefit through Empathic Listening
we can create Synergy.
• Synergizing requires personal security to
listen to another’s approach to the problem
and to share ideas or strategies.
• Synergizing often brings us to a third
alternative and produces better long term
results.
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Habits to Live By
• Openness + Communications = Synergy.
• Defined: Synergy is the whole is greater
than the sum of its parts (1 +3 = 5-fold,11-
fold or even 95-fold).
• In Action: Synergy is when two or more
people produce more together than the
sum total of what they could have
produced individually.
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• What Synergy Is?
–Results oriented
–Values diverse perspectives
–Cooperation
–Mutually agreed upon goals
–Everybody has worth
–A process
Habits to Live By
• What Synergy Is Not?
• A brainstorming “anything goes session.”
• Accepting others’ ideas as the full truth.
• Win-lose postures.
• Group think.
• Only a negotiating technique.
• Always easy.
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Steps to Creative Cooperation:
– Consider the situation or opportunity
– Use Habit 5 (Seek to Understand)to explore
the underlying differences/causes of the
situation. Delineate the expectations or
positions of each party.
– Use Habit 4 (Think Win/Win) to introduce the
idea that a mutually beneficial solution can be
achieved. (Build the Emotional Bank Account)
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Steps to Creative Cooperation (con’t):
– Use Habit 6 (Synergy) to test the solutions by
allowing all parties to share their own ideas
and feelings about how the solution can be
achieved. (Value the differences.)
– The Result: A third Alternative involving
Creative Cooperation.
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Habits to Live By
Activity—
• Describe a personal or professional
situation in which you really valued
someone’s differences, and valuing those
differences positively impacted your
relationship.
• Discuss the evidence, effects, and benefits
of valuing the other person’s differences.
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Habits to Live By
• What are some blocks to Creative
Cooperation:
Blocks to Creative
Cooperation
Alternative Perspectives
Defensiveness
Let your guard down, take a risk
Closed-mindedness
Recognize your own perceptual
limitations
Adversarial
Give credence to the possibility
that the other person is right.
Protective Maintain self-confidence and
personal security.
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Habits to Live By
• Value Differences
• People respect each other.
• Value diverse perspectives.
• View differences as opportunities for
learning. Toleration is key.
• Differences enable us to discover and
produce solutions together that we would
not be able to do separately.
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Activity--
• Discuss a situation from your personal or
professional life in which valuing the differences of
someone else produced greater results than the
sum of what you could have produced individually.
• What were the differences?
• What was it about the other person that made you value
the differences between you?
• What did you learn from the experience?
• What effect did valuing the differences have on the
outcome?
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• Well, that activity may have caused you to see a
bigger picture of who you are and how you view
and value (mindset) others.
• One thing is for sure, you have to be mentally
prepared (inner personal security) to accept and
value the differences of others.
– Think win-win.
– Be open to new possibilities.
– Take a risk and value the differences of others.
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Habits to Live By
• Using the Seek First to Understand
Then To Be Understood habit allows
you the room to Creatively Cooperate
with the other party.
• Compromise sometimes is that third
alternative, but it is a low form of win-
win. Somebody had to give up
something to compromise.
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• Here’s some helpful tips when trying to
create a third alternative:
– Communicate to hear the feelings, body language
and the words to understand the other’s
perspective, build the emotional bank account.
– Express how you feel with courage and
consideration for feelings of others.
– Create a safe space where people can be open
to express themselves and abandon old scripts.
– Seek solutions that both parties feel good about,
a third alternative.
Habits to Live By
• Let’s apply Creative Cooperation to synergize
in the following situations using habits 4 and
5. You provide a response.
– This person really irritates me because we always are
at odds.
– I feel I am seeing the world through my cultural
lenses, and not as things really are.
– My family member or co-worker strengths are valued.
– To practice humility in my dealings with others, I need
to chill out.
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• In Summary…..
• Know that two heads are better than one (all
other things being equal).
• Know that better solutions come out of
valuing everyone’s input.
• Work to create an environment that is win-
win, inclusive of different perspectives and
view points, and believing that a joint solution
is better than any individual solution.
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• Next Steps
• We have placed an exit questionnaire on
survey monkey for you to complete to
assess how well you have retained this
module’s information.
• Complete the survey by going to
www.surveymonkey.com weblink.
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• Thank you for engaging in this on line
presentation.
• Our next NLDI session will be on
April 26, 2017 at 2:00pm
• Please compete the SurveyMonkey.