Get the Results You Want! NAPLAN -style Test · PDF fileExcel Test Zone NAPLAN*-style Test...

Excel Test Zone

NAPLAN*-style

Test Pack

Alan Horsfi eld &Allyn Jones

* This is not an offi cially endorsed publication of the NAPLAN program and is produced by Pascal Press independently of Australian governments.

In 2011 the Writing Test will change to a persuasive text.

** These tests are free for private personal use only.

FREE** Sample Writing Tests for persuasive texts

Get the Results You Want!

Copyright © 2011 Pascal Press

ISBN 978 1 74125 232 3

Pascal PressPO Box 250Glebe NSW 2037(02) 8585 4044www.pascalpress.com.au

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Disclaimer Excel Test Zone is a brand of Pascal Press. The official body that produces the NAPLAN Tests, Curriculum Corporation, in no way endorses or is connected to this product in any way. All efforts have been made by the Publisher to make these questions match the actual NAPLAN Test questions, although NAPLAN Tests are subject to change without notice. Pascal Press makes no representations about whether doing these test questions will improve your results in the actual NAPLAN Tests.

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34

YEAR 5 WRITING TEST: Tips for writing persuasive texts

Log in to www.exceltestzone.com.au Excel Test Zone Year 5 Test Guide

Persuasive texts (expositions or opinions) are used to ‘argue’ the case for or against a particular action, plan or point of view—to persuade others to see it your way. Persuasive texts need to be well organised and clear so that readers will understand and be convinced of your arguments.

When writing persuasive texts it is best to keep the following points in mind. They will help you get the best possible mark.

Before you start writing► Read the question carefully. You will probably be

asked to write your reaction to a particular question or statement, such as Dogs should be kept out of parks. Most of the topics that you will be asked to comment on are very general. This means you will probably be writing about something you know and can draw upon your experience. When writing your personal opinion you may include such phrases as I think, I believe and It is important. Remember to sound confident. Some common ways for the question to be worded are: Give your opinion on …; Do you agree or disagree?; What do you think is/are …?; What changes would you like to see …?; Is … a good idea or a bad idea?

► You will be expected to give your reasons. Sometimes the question may actually state Give your reasons. Remember: the stance taken in a persuasive text is not wrong, as long as the writer has evidence to support his or her opinion. How the opinion is supported is as important as the opinion itself.

► Give yourself a few minutes before you start writing to get your thoughts in order and jot down points.

The introduction► Right from the beginning it is important to let the

reader know what position you have taken or what you believe. You can do this via the title or in the first line or paragraph, which may include a brief preview of the main arguments and some background information.

The body► Follow the structure of persuasive texts. As

persuasive texts aim to convince readers, your reasons must be logical and easily understood. You must provide both arguments (points) and evidence to support the arguments.

► Correctly paragraph your writing. Use paragraphs with topic sentences to organise your information. Without paragraphs your arguments become confused and difficult to follow. Use one paragraph for each idea or argument. Arguments can be ordered according to your choice. They can be ‘numbered’, e.g. firstly, secondly, finally.

► Make sure your arguments (or points) are relevant. They must add to your case. ‘Waffle’ and unnecessary detail don’t improve a persuasive text. It is better to stick to the facts without getting sidetracked. Once you have made a point there is no need to repeat it.

► Use interesting, precise words. Include strong persuasive words such as must, believe, important or certainly. Avoid common words that carry little or no meaning, such as good. You can state your arguments using sentences beginning with words such as firstly, furthermore or finally.

► Vary the types and lengths of sentences and the words that begin each sentence. If your writing includes a personal opinion, try to avoid too many sentences starting with I.

► Use impersonal writing, although personal opinions can be part of the text.

The conclusion► The final paragraph must restate your position more

forcefully and wrap up your case. It can include a recommendation.

When you have finished writing give yourself a few moments to read through your persuasive text. Quickly check spelling and punctuation, and insert any words that have been accidentally left out. Direct speech is not a feature of persuasive texts. Indirect speech (reported speech) does not have quotation marks (“ ”).

Check the official NAPLAN website for important updates. You are told what type of writing will be tested. From 2008 to 2010 it was a narrative text and in 2011 it will be a persuasive text. Click on the ‘Domains’ tab on the official NAPLAN website (www.naplan.edu.au) for the latest updates on the Writing Test and to see what writing marking criteria NAPLAN markers use when assessing your writing. A sample Writing Task is also provided.

Log in to www.exceltestzone.com.auExcel Test Zone Year 5 Test Guide 33

YEAR 5 WRITING TEST 1: Persuasive text

Today you are going to write a persuasive text, often called an exposition.

The purpose of writing a persuasive text is to infl uence or change a reader’s thoughts or opinions on a particular topic or subject. Your aim is to convince a reader that your opinion is sensible and logical. Successful persuasive writing is always well planned. Persuasive texts may include advertisements, letters to newspapers, speeches and newspaper editorials, as well as arguments in debates.

Hats should not be compulsory at schools.What do you think about this idea? Do you support or reject this proposal?

Write to convince a reader of your opinions.

Before you start writingGive some thought to:• whether you strongly agree or strongly disagree with this plan• reasons or evidence for your arguments• a brief but defi nite conclusion—list some of your main points and

add a personal opinion• the structure of a persuasive text, which begins with a well-organised

introduction, followed by a body of arguments or points, and fi nally a conclusion that restates the writer’s position.

Don’t forget to:• plan your writing before you start—make a list of important points

you wish to make• write in correctly formed sentences and take care with paragraphing• choose your words carefully, and pay attention to your spelling

and punctuation• write neatly but don’t waste time• quickly check your persuasive text once you have fi nished—your

position must be clear to the reader.

Remember: the stance taken in a persuasive text is not wrong, as long as the writer has evidence to support his or her opinion. How the opinion is supported is as important as the opinion itself.

Voca

bula

ry• A

goo

d va

riety

of p

reci

se

verb

type

s ar

e us

ed

to e

stab

lish

stro

ng,

info

rmed

arg

umen

ts.

• Nou

ns a

re u

sed

to m

ake

gene

ralis

ed s

tate

men

ts.

• Adv

erbs

and

adj

ectiv

es

are

wel

l sel

ecte

d to

qu

alify

sta

tem

ents

.• T

he p

rono

un I

is

used

spa

ringl

y.

Sent

ence

str

uctu

re• A

goo

d va

riety

of s

ente

nce

begi

nnin

gs (e

.g. F

inal

ly,

Hat

s) a

re in

clud

ed.

• A v

arie

ty o

f sen

tenc

e ty

pes

and

sent

ence

leng

ths

are

used

.• T

opic

sen

tenc

es a

re

used

to in

trodu

ce e

ach

para

grap

h’s

mai

n id

ea.

• Que

stio

ns a

nd

excl

amat

ions

are

use

d to

go

od e

ffect

.

Punc

tuat

ion

• Pun

ctua

tion,

incl

udin

g ap

ostro

phes

and

full

stop

s,

is c

orre

ctly

app

lied.

Idea

s• I

deas

are

wel

l bal

ance

d to

cr

eate

a s

ense

of r

atio

nal,

logi

cal a

rgum

ent.

• A s

trong

vie

wpo

int i

s ex

pres

sed

thro

ugh

care

ful

choi

ce o

f wor

ds.

• Ide

as a

re p

rese

nted

po

sitiv

ely

and

forc

eful

ly.

Spel

ling

• The

re a

re n

o sp

ellin

g m

ista

kes

of c

omm

on o

r un

usua

l wor

ds.

Aud

ienc

e• T

he a

udie

nce

is re

adily

id

enti

ed

(prim

ary

stud

ents

). • R

eade

rs a

re q

uick

ly

enga

ged

in a

rele

vant

is

sue.

• A

brie

f sta

tem

ent o

utlin

es

the

issu

e to

be

disc

usse

d.• B

ackg

roun

d in

form

atio

n is

pr

ovid

ed to

giv

e co

ntex

t to

the

poin

ts ra

ised

.

Pers

uasi

ve te

chni

ques

• Arg

umen

ts fo

r the

writ

er’s

re

actio

n ar

e or

gani

sed

into

se

para

te p

arag

raph

s.• P

oint

s ra

ised

are

obv

ious

ly

impo

rtant

to th

e w

riter

in a

pe

rson

al w

ay.

• Evi

denc

e an

d ex

ampl

es

are

used

to s

uppo

rt th

e ar

gum

ent.

• Obj

ectiv

ity is

mai

ntai

ned

thro

ugho

ut th

e w

ritin

g.

Text

str

uctu

re• T

he te

xt c

onta

ins

a w

ell-o

rgan

ised

intro

duct

ion,

bo

dy a

nd c

oncl

usio

n.• T

he w

riter

refe

rs re

gula

rly

to w

ords

use

d in

the

topi

c.

Para

grap

hing

• New

par

agra

phs

are

used

for n

ew a

rgum

ents

, an

d th

e in

trodu

ctio

n an

d co

nclu

sion

.

Coh

esio

n• T

he

nal p

arag

raph

re

itera

tes

the

writ

er’s

op

posi

tion.

• A

de

nite

con

clus

ion

refe

rs

to a

poi

nt m

ade

in th

e op

enin

g pa

ragr

aph.

Lang

uage

and

idea

s

Hat

s sh

oul

d n

ot

be

com

pul

sory

at

scho

ols

.P

rimar

y sc

hool

s ha

ve a

rule

: no

hat,

no p

lay.

Thi

s is

ver

y un

fair

for s

tude

nts

who

do

n’t l

ike

wea

ring

hats

. We

are

told

we

live

in a

free

cou

ntry

. We

have

free

dom

of

choi

ce. T

here

is n

o ch

oice

at s

choo

l if y

ou w

ant t

o pl

ay w

ith y

our f

riend

s.

Sch

ool h

ats

have

not

hing

to d

o w

ith lo

oks.

The

y sp

oil a

ttrac

tive

hairs

tyle

s in

bot

h bo

ys a

nd g

irls.

Who

ever

dec

ides

the

hat s

tyle

stu

dent

s w

ear r

arel

y as

ks w

hat t

he

stud

ents

wan

t.

Sec

ondl

y ha

ts d

o no

t im

prov

e ho

w w

ell y

ou le

arn.

The

y do

n’t c

hang

e be

havi

our a

t sc

hool

. Bul

lies

are

still

bul

lies

if th

ey a

re w

earin

g a

hat o

r hat

less

.

I bel

ieve

hat

s ar

e a

heal

th h

azar

d! H

ats

enco

urag

e th

e sp

read

of l

ice.

Chi

ldre

n w

ith li

ce w

ho s

wap

hat

s ca

n pa

ss th

e pr

oble

m o

nto

othe

r stu

dent

s. L

ice

are

hard

to

con

trol a

nd c

an b

e an

em

barr

assm

ent.

In s

umm

er h

ats

can

beco

me

swea

ty

and

crea

te it

chy

scal

ps.

Som

eone

will

say

that

hat

s st

op s

kin

canc

er. T

hese

peo

ple

have

not

not

iced

that

m

ost s

choo

ls h

ave

shad

y tre

es a

nd s

hady

are

as w

here

stu

dent

s ca

n si

t and

pla

y.

Fina

lly if

it’s

oka

y fo

r spo

rts p

eopl

e to

go

with

out h

ats,

why

is it

so

impo

rtant

for

stud

ents

to w

ear h

ats?

Man

y ou

tdoo

r spo

rts a

re p

laye

d w

ithou

t hat

s. T

enni

s pl

ayer

s an

d fo

otba

llers

don

’t w

ear h

ats.

Oly

mpi

c at

hlet

es d

on’t

wea

r hat

s, y

et

stud

ents

hav

e to

wea

r hat

s if

they

wan

t to

play

gam

es. G

ames

kee

p pe

ople

t

and

heal

thy.

I can

not s

uppo

rt th

e id

ea o

f for

cing

stu

dent

s to

wea

r hat

s. T

here

are

few

hea

lth

bene

ts. I

f par

ents

wan

t the

ir ch

ild to

wea

r a h

at th

en th

at’s

thei

r dec

isio

n. P

aren

ts

know

thei

r chi

ldre

n be

tter t

han

teac

hers

do.

Hat

s ca

n ca

use

unhe

alth

y he

ad

cond

ition

s an

d th

ey ta

ke a

way

free

dom

of c

hoic

e. S

choo

ls s

houl

d be

trai

ning

st

uden

ts to

use

this

free

dom

wis

ely.

Stru

ctur

e

Exce

l Te

st Z

one

© P

asca

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ss 2

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Year

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ampl

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g 1:

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This

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M

YEAR 5 WRITING TEST 1: Sample of a High to Very high level piece of writing




Handwriting should no longer be taught in schools.What do you think about this idea? Do you support or reject this proposal?

Write to convince a reader of your opinions.

Before you start writingGive some thought to:• whether you strongly agree or strongly disagree

with this plan• reasons or evidence for your arguments• a brief but defi nite conclusion—list some of your

main points and add a personal opinion• the structure of a persuasive text, which begins

with a well-organised introduction, followed by a body of arguments or points, and fi nally a conclusion that restates the writer’s position.

Don’t forget to:• plan your writing before you start—make a list of

important points you wish to make• write in correctly formed sentences and take care

with paragraphing• choose your words carefully, and pay attention to

your spelling and punctuation• write neatly but don’t waste time• quickly check your persuasive text once you have

fi nished—your position must be clear to the reader.


•

•

••

Rissusu

Copyright © 2010 Pascal Press ISBN 978 1 74125 232 3 Excel Test Zone Year 5 Sample Test 120


Aud

ienc

e• T

he a

udie

nce

is

read

ily id

enti

ed

(stu

dent

s, te

ache

rs).

• A b

rief s

tate

men

t is

mad

e ou

tlini

ng th

e is

sue

to

be d

iscu

ssed

.• B

ackg

roun

d in

form

atio

n is

pr

ovid

ed to

giv

e co

ntex

t to

the

poin

ts ra

ised

Pers

uasi

ve te

chni

ques

• Arg

umen

ts fo

r the

writ

er’s

re

actio

n ar

e or

gani

sed

into

se

para

te p

arag

raph

s.• P

oint

s ra

ised

are

obv

ious

ly

impo

rtant

to th

e w

riter

in a

pe

rson

al w

ay.

• Evi

denc

e an

d ex

ampl

es

supp

ort t

he a

rgum

ent.

• Obj

ectiv

ity is

mai

ntai

ned

thro

ugho

ut th

e w

ritin

g.• T

he w

riter

has

a

frien

dly

styl

e.

Text

str

uctu

re• T

he te

xt c

onta

ins

a w

ell-o

rgan

ised

intro

duct

ion,

bo

dy a

nd c

oncl

usio

n.• T

he w

riter

refe

rs re

gula

rly

to w

ords

use

d in

th

e op

enin

g.

Para

grap

hing

• New

par

agra

phs

are

used

fo

r new

arg

umen

ts a

nd

the

sum

mar

y.

Coh

esio

n• T

ime

refe

renc

es c

reat

e a

unify

ing

thre

ad.

• The

na

l par

agra

ph

esta

blis

hes

whe

re th

e w

riter

sta

nds

on th

e is

sue.

• The

con

clud

ing

sent

ence

is

forc

eful

and

per

sona

l.

Voca

bula

ry• A

goo

d va

riety

of p

reci

se

verb

type

s ar

e us

ed

to e

stab

lish

stro

ng,

info

rmed

arg

umen

ts.

• Nou

ns a

re u

sed

to m

ake

gene

ralis

ed s

tate

men

ts.

• Adv

erbs

and

adj

ectiv

es

are

wel

l sel

ecte

d to

qu

alify

sta

tem

ents

.• T

he p

rono

un I

is

used

spa

ringl

y.

Sent

ence

str

uctu

re• A

goo

d va

riety

of s

ente

nce

begi

nnin

gs (e

.g. A

s,

Usi

ng) a

re u

sed.

• A v

arie

ty o

f sen

tenc

e ty

pes

and

leng

ths

are

incl

uded

.• T

opic

sen

tenc

es a

re

used

to in

trodu

ce e

ach

para

grap

h’s

mai

n id

ea.

• Exc

lam

atio

ns a

re u

sed

to

good

effe

ct.

Punc

tuat

ion

• Pun

ctua

tion,

incl

udin

g ap

ostro

phes

, bra

cket

s an

d fu

ll st

ops,

is

corr

ectly

app

lied.

Idea

s• I

deas

are

wel

l bal

ance

d to

cr

eate

a s

ense

of r

atio

nal,

logi

cal a

rgum

ent.

• A s

trong

vie

wpo

int i

s ex

pres

sed

thro

ugh

care

ful

choi

ce o

f wor

ds.

• Ide

as a

re

pres

ente

d cl

early

.• A

llite

ratio

n is

us

ed e

ffect

ivel

y.

Spel

ling

• The

re a

re n

o sp

ellin

g m

ista

kes

of c

omm

on o

r un

usua

l wor

ds.

Han

dwri

ting

shou

ld n

olo

nger

be t

augh

t in

scho

ols.

It w

as in

tere

stin

g to

lear

n th

at h

andw

ritin

g m

ay n

o lo

nger

be

taug

ht. I

bel

ieve

peo

ple

shou

ld b

e ab

le to

writ

e, b

ut te

achi

ng h

andw

ritin

g is

a w

aste

of t

ime.

Com

pute

rs a

re p

art o

f our

mod

ern

wor

ld. K

eybo

ards

allo

w p

eopl

e to

type

thei

r tho

ught

s. If

yo

u ow

n a

com

pute

r you

don

’t ne

ed a

pen

or p

aper

. Tex

t can

be

sent

from

one

per

son

to

anot

her a

nd it

’s a

ll on

a s

cree

n—co

mpu

ter o

r pho

ne. N

o pa

per r

equi

red—

trees

sav

ed!

Em

ails

are

repl

acin

g le

tters

and

som

e ha

ve fa

ncy

card

-like

gre

etin

gs p

rogr

amm

es. E

mai

ls

are

writ

ten

usin

g co

mpu

ters

. It i

s si

mpl

e to

add

atta

chm

ents

for a

dver

tisem

ents

and

no

tices

. Tex

t mes

sage

s ar

e ta

king

ove

r fro

m n

otes

. Com

pute

rs e

ven

pred

ict w

hat y

ou

wan

t to

writ

e an

d co

rrec

t spe

lling

mis

take

s as

you

writ

e. N

o-on

e ne

eds

to w

rite

by h

and.

Em

ails

and

text

mes

sage

s ar

e ch

eape

r tha

n po

stin

g le

tters

or c

ards

. The

y ar

e m

ore

conv

enie

nt to

sen

d. T

hey

are

inst

ant.

If th

ey a

re u

sed

wis

ely,

they

can

be

pers

onal

.

Teac

hers

spe

nd a

lot o

f tim

e te

achi

ng h

andw

ritin

g. A

s ha

ndw

ritin

g is

a d

ying

ski

ll,

that

tim

e co

uld

be s

pent

on

mod

ern

subj

ects

. Man

y sc

hool

s us

e co

pybo

oks

to te

ach

hand

writ

ing.

If h

andw

ritin

g is

not

taug

ht th

en p

aren

ts (o

r sch

ools

) won

’t ne

ed to

pur

chas

e su

ch b

ooks

.

Som

e ha

ndw

ritin

g is

not

eas

y to

read

. Man

y pe

ople

don

’t fo

rm th

eir w

ords

cor

rect

ly.

Diff

eren

t sta

tes

teac

h di

ffere

nt h

andw

ritin

g st

yles

. Com

pute

r prin

t is

alw

ays

read

able

. Le

tters

are

alw

ays

the

sam

e.

Usi

ng a

com

pute

r has

oth

er a

dvan

tage

s. T

here

is n

o lo

nger

the

prob

lem

of l

eaky

biro

s bl

otch

ing

clot

hes,

boo

ks o

r pro

ject

s. T

ext o

n a

scre

en d

oesn

’t sm

udge

at a

ll! P

rivat

e in

form

atio

n on

pap

er h

as to

be

shre

dded

. With

em

ails

you

sim

ply

tap

the

DE

LETE

key

.

I con

cur t

hat t

each

ing

hand

writ

ing

is n

o lo

nger

nec

essa

ry. L

ittle

tim

e sh

ould

be

spen

t te

achi

ng it

. Com

pute

r prin

t is

easi

er to

read

. Com

pute

r mai

l is

chea

per a

nd fa

ster

. E

very

one

has

eith

er a

com

pute

r or m

obile

pho

ne. S

choo

ls th

at te

ach

hand

writ

ing

are

livin

g in

the

past

.

Lang

uage

and

idea

sSt

ruct

ure

A VE

RY G

OO

D

A VE

RY G

OO

D

PIEC

E O

F W

RIT

ING

PIEC

E O

F W

RIT

ING

Exce

l Te

st Z

one

© P

asca

l Pre

ss 2

010

Year

5 S

ampl

e W

ritin

g 2:

Per

suas

ive

text

This

writ

ing

sam

ple

has

been

ana

lyse

d ba

sed

on th

e m

arki

ng c

riter

ia u

sed

by m

arke

rs to

ass

ess

the

NA

PLA

N W

ritin

g Te

st.

VG

ood_

Sam

ple

Sto

ry Y

r5 N

AP

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10/1

1/10

2:

31 P

M

YEAR 5 WRITING TEST 2: Sample of a very good piece of writing

Log in to www.exceltestzone.com.au Excel Test Zone Year 5 Test Guide61



Fairy tales are not suitable stories for young children.What do you think about this opinion? Write to convince a reader of your opinions.

Before you start writingGive some thought to:• whether you strongly agree or strongly disagree

with this plan• reasons or evidence for your arguments• a brief but defi nite conclusion—list some of

your main points and add a personal opinion• the structure of a persuasive text, which begins

with a well-organised introduction, followed by a body of arguments or points, and fi nally a conclusion that restates the writer’s position.

Don’t forget to:• plan your writing before you start—make a

list of important points you wish to make• write in correctly formed sentences and

take care with paragraphing• choose your words carefully, and pay

attention to your spelling and punctuation• write neatly but don’t waste time• quickly check your persuasive text once

you have fi nished—your position must be clear to the reader.


Copyright © 2010 Pascal Press ISBN 978 1 74125 232 3 Excel Test Zone Year 5 Sample Test 220


Aud

ienc

e• T

he a

udie

nce

is re

adily

id

enti

ed

(fam

ilies

).• A

brie

f sta

tem

ent i

s m

ade

outli

ning

the

issu

e to

be

dis

cuss

ed.

• Bac

kgro

und

info

rmat

ion

is

prov

ided

to g

ive

cont

ext t

o th

e po

ints

rais

ed

Pers

uasi

ve te

chni

ques

• Arg

umen

ts fo

r the

writ

er’s

po

int o

f vie

w a

re o

rgan

ised

in

to n

umbe

red

para

grap

hs.

• Poi

nts

rais

ed a

re o

bvio

usly

im

porta

nt to

the

writ

er in

a

pers

onal

way

.• E

vide

nce

and

exam

ples

ar

e us

ed to

sup

port

the

argu

men

t.• O

bjec

tivity

is m

aint

aine

d th

roug

hout

the

writ

ing.

Text

str

uctu

re• T

he te

xt c

onta

ins

a w

ell-o

rgan

ised

intro

duct

ion,

bo

dy a

nd c

oncl

usio

n.• T

he w

riter

refe

rs re

gula

rly

to w

ords

use

d in

the

topi

c.

Para

grap

hing

• A n

ew p

arag

raph

is u

sed

for e

ach

new

arg

umen

t an

d th

e su

mm

ary.

Coh

esio

n• T

he

nal p

arag

raph

es

tabl

ishe

s w

here

th

e w

riter

sta

nds

on th

e is

sue

with

a

forc

eful

and

per

sona

l co

nclu

ding

sen

tenc

e.

Voca

bula

ry• A

goo

d va

riety

of p

reci

se

verb

type

s ar

e us

ed

to e

stab

lish

stro

ng,

info

rmed

arg

umen

ts.

Nou

ns a

re u

sed

to m

ake

gene

ralis

ed s

tate

men

ts.

Adv

erbs

and

adj

ectiv

es

are

wel

l sel

ecte

d to

qu

alify

sta

tem

ents

.• T

he p

rono

un I

is

used

spa

ringl

y.

Sent

ence

str

uctu

re• A

goo

d va

riety

of s

ente

nce

begi

nnin

gs a

re in

clud

ed

(e.g

. Jus

t, Fa

ncy,

Fin

ally

).• A

var

iety

of s

ente

nce

type

s an

d le

ngth

s ar

e us

ed.

• Top

ic s

ente

nces

are

us

ed to

intro

duce

the

para

grap

h’s

mai

n id

ea.

• Rhe

toric

al q

uest

ions

and

ex

clam

atio

ns a

re u

sed

to

good

effe

ct.

Punc

tuat

ion

• Pun

ctua

tion,

incl

udin

g ap

ostro

phes

and

full

stop

s,

is c

orre

ctly

app

lied.

Idea

s• I

deas

are

wel

l bal

ance

d to

cr

eate

a s

ense

of r

atio

nal,

logi

cal a

rgum

ent.

• A s

trong

vie

wpo

int i

s ex

pres

sed

thro

ugh

care

ful

choi

ce o

f wor

ds.

• Ide

as a

re p

rese

nted

fo

rcef

ully

and

con

den

tly.

• Goo

d us

e is

mad

e of

alli

tera

tion.

Spel

ling

• The

re a

re n

o sp

ellin

g m

ista

kes

of c

omm

on o

r un

usua

l wor

ds.

Lang

uage

and

idea

s

Fa

iry

tale

s ar

e

not

sui

tabl

e st

orie

s

for

youn

g ch

ildre

n.N

o-on

e re

ally

con

side

rs th

e co

nseq

uenc

e of

exp

osin

g ch

ildre

n to

fairy

tale

s. J

ust b

ecau

se

they

’ve

been

aro

und

for c

entu

ries

does

n’t m

ake

them

acc

epta

ble

liter

atur

e fo

r sm

all

child

ren.

I w

ill e

xpla

in w

hy th

ey a

re u

nsui

tabl

e be

dtim

e st

orie

s.

Firs

tly m

any

are

lled

with

dre

adfu

l, ev

il pe

ople

or b

eing

s. T

here

are

gia

nts,

re

-bre

athi

ng

drag

ons,

wic

ked

witc

hes

and

nast

y go

blin

s. T

he Q

ueen

of H

earts

wan

ts to

cho

p of

f he

ads.

Fai

ry ta

les

can

give

you

ng c

hild

ren

nigh

tmar

es. O

n TV

they

sho

uld

have

M

ratin

gs!

Sec

ondl

y th

ings

that

hap

pen

in fa

iry ta

les

are

ofte

n ho

rri

c. G

iant

s ar

e ki

lled

falli

ng fr

om

clou

ds. W

itche

s try

to p

ut c

hild

ren

into

ove

ns o

r fee

d lit

tle g

irls

pois

oned

app

les.

Mea

n m

en lo

ck m

aide

ns in

cas

tle tu

rret

s. B

abie

s ge

t sto

len.

Wol

ves

eat l

ittle

old

ladi

es. T

here

is

so m

uch

viol

ence

that

infa

nts

beco

me

fear

ful o

f the

real

wor

ld.

Man

y fa

iry ta

les

are

incr

edib

ly s

exis

t. W

omen

are

ofte

n w

itche

s an

d st

epm

othe

rs a

re

crue

l and

cun

ning

. Sis

ters

are

ugl

y. T

he y

oung

, attr

activ

e he

roin

e is

bey

ond

belie

f as

the

perfe

ct c

hild

!

Hea

lth a

nd s

afet

y ar

e co

mpl

etel

y ig

nore

d in

fairy

tale

s. D

war

fs w

ork

long

hou

rs in

min

es.

Boy

s cl

imb

gian

t vin

es. F

ancy

kis

sing

a s

limy,

col

d fro

g? N

ot m

e!

Fina

lly fa

iry ta

les

prov

ide

sim

ple

solu

tions

to c

ompl

ex p

robl

ems.

A fe

w m

agic

wor

ds a

nd

a pr

oble

m d

isap

pear

s. A

kis

s fro

m a

prin

ce a

nd e

very

thin

g tu

rns

out j

ust

ne!

Gee

se la

y go

lden

egg

s. U

gly

duck

lings

bec

ome

beau

tiful

sw

ans.

You

ng c

hild

ren

can

be c

onfu

sed

by

the

sim

plic

ity o

f it a

ll. T

he g

ood

peop

le li

ve h

appi

ly e

ver a

fter—

this

rare

ly h

appe

ns. L

ife is

no

t car

efre

e.

Sto

ryte

llers

def

end

fairy

tale

s. T

hey

clai

m th

at th

ey a

re n

ot tr

ue, b

ut y

oung

chi

ldre

n ha

ve d

if c

ulty

in w

orki

ng o

ut w

hat i

s re

al a

nd w

hat i

s no

t. Fa

iry ta

les

can

caus

e fe

ar a

nd

unce

rtain

ty. T

hey

shou

ld n

ot b

e m

ade

avai

labl

e to

you

ng c

hild

ren.

Stru

ctur

eA

VERY

GO

OD

A

VERY

GO

OD

PI

ECE

OF

WR

ITIN

GPI

ECE

OF

WR

ITIN

G

Exce

l Te

st Z

one

© P

asca

l Pre

ss 2

010

Year

5 S

ampl

e W

ritin

g 3:

Per

suas

ive

text

This

writ

ing

sam

ple

has

been

ana

lyse

d ba

sed

on th

e m

arki

ng c

riter

ia u

sed

by m

arke

rs to

ass

ess

the

NA

PLA

N W

ritin

g Te

st.

VG

ood_

Sam

ple

Sto

ry Y

r5 N

AP

LAN

BW

.indd

3

10/1

1/10

2:

31 P

M


YEAR 5 WRITING TEST 3: Sample of a very good piece of writing

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