Gabrielle - FTRI - Communication -...

Communicating EffectivelyFlorida Telecommunications

Relay, Inc.

13 May 2014Gabrielle K. Gabrielli, Ph.D.

Ground Rules

1. Turn any cell phones or pagers to the off orsilent position.

2. Be on time including from breaks.3. Listen actively.4. Keep an open mind.5. Be respectful to everyone; don’t interrupt.6. If you break any rules, you sing.

Training Series

1. Teambuilding2. Emotional Intelligence3. Communicating Effectively4. Providing Exceptional Customer

Service: How to Be a REAL Success

Agenda0900 Ground Rules, Icebreaker, Objectives, Recap

0915 Communicating EffectivelyIn PersonBy Email

0930 Communicating by PhoneAnswering, Putting on Hold, TransferringSelf-Assessment

1000 The Power of WordsCALM Model and Application of the Model

1030 Everyone Communicates, Few Connect

1100 Adjourn

Learning ObjectivesBy the end of this course, participants should be able to:

• Discuss the most effective ways to communicatein person.

• Describe behaviors that work whencommunicating on the telephone.

• Identify proper email etiquette.• Explain the importance of respect with

communication including email etiquette.• Explain the importance of connecting with

people instead of just communicating.

Communication = Potential

Communication Model

Shannon-Weaver

Communication Model

Communication Self-Assessment

Communication Essentials

• You are the face and the voice of FTRI.• The way you communicate with others

affects the way they respond to you andreact to your requests.

• Any negative communication reflectsnegatively on you and on the entireorganization.

Modes of Communication

• Face-to-face is preferable so you can seebody language and connect better.

• Use the most appropriate method possiblefor the kind of communication you need toconvey.

When Answering the Phone

• Greet the caller with “Good morning!” or“Good afternoon!”.

• Identify the organization.• State your name.

When Putting a Caller on Holdor Transferring a Call

• Ask for permission to place the call onhold or connect the call to someone else.

• Get the person’s name and number incase you are disconnected.

• If transferring, stay on the line until the callis connected.

• If transferring, introduce individuals to oneanother and summarize the issue.

When Speaking by Phone

• Ask questions as needed to gain clarity.• Take notes as needed.• Use tone, pitch, and pace to emphasize

important points.• Summarize next steps.• Thank the person for his or her time.

Avoid fillers that diminish your credibility like“umm,” “uh,” or “hmm.”

When Speaking by Phone

• Prepare for the conversation to stay ontask.

• Refer to the person formally unless theperson says to use his or her first name.

• Smile. Your overall tone will be betterreceived.

• Listen without distractions to focus.

If emale and leturs r writon with speelingand gramitckal misteaks, u mite git themeening, but the messige is not asaffectiv or easily reedible.

• “The most valuable of all talents is that ofnever using two words when one will do.”

Thomas Jefferson

Be Concise

• One idea per paragraph• 2-4 sentences per paragraph• 2-3 paragraphs per email• No more than 3 concepts per email

Netiquette

• The correct or acceptable way ofcommunicating on the Internet

• An informal set of guidelines and rulesused for communicating on the Internet

Email Etiquette Tips

1. Write concisely and professionally.2. Use all rules of proper business writing

including using active voice instead ofpassive voice. Use correct spelling,grammar, and punctuation.

3. Check your facts to ensure accuracy. If indoubt, do not send it.


4. Read your email message out loud beforeyou send it.

5. Use plain text formatting. If you use html,select legible colors and fonts.

6. Address the recipient appropriatelyincluding the use of To, Bcc, and Cc.

7. Err on the side of formality, especially withsalutations.


8. When the distribution list is greater thanapproximately 10, blind copy multiplerecipients rather than displaying all emailaddresses.

9. Do not overuse Reply All.10. Prevent email flaming whenever possible.

If you feel angry or upset, wait one hourbefore sending or responding to an emailmessage.


11. Do not copy the chain of command unlessit is protocol.

12. Answer promptly, but don’t become aslave to your email.

13. If you won’t be able to respond for sometime, and it is urgent, respond to let thesender know that you received themessage and that you are working on theresponse.

Email Etiquette Tips14. Use an appropriate subject line and correct

the subject line when needed.15. Use the high priority message option

sparingly.16. When attaching documents, limit file size to

1MB (5MB for high speed) and ensure adescriptive file name and appropriate fileformat.


17. Do not write in ALL CAPS. It is theequivalent of yelling!

18. Delete the message thread when thetopic changes.

19. Respond at the top of a messagethread, and avoid embedding responseswithin a thread.

Email Etiquette Tips20. Avoid the use of acronyms, excessive

punctuation, and emoticons. ☺21. Do not request delivery and read receipts,

or ask to recall a message.22. Do not forward viruses, hoaxes, jokes, or

chain letters. http://snopes.com

Email Etiquette Tips23. Do not reply to SPAM, but do remove

yourself from unwanted solicitations.24. Always close email with your name.25. If you use a signature, ensure that it is

appropriate and brief.26. Don’t send anything via email that you

wouldn’t want published in thenewspaper.

Email Basics

• Clear• Concise• To the point• No slang or jargon• Avoid FLAMING

Flaming

• A critical message sent via electronic mail,usually in quick response to anothermessage

Things that Flame

• Tone• Adjectives that put people down (i.e. ignorant,

lazy, sloppy)• Words that accuse (you don’t get it, don’t

understand, you are missing the point)• Words like problem, error, issue• ALL CAPS• Quoting the other person (i.e. “problem”).• Copying higher chain of command when it is not

protocol

Ask Yourself

• Is your tone friendly, professional,respectful, accusing, etc.?

• If your email were to be sent to your boss,the legislature, the newspaper, or yourmother, would you be embarrassed?

Avoid Flaming

• If you read something that appears to beflaming, wait an hour before respondingvia email.

• Re-read the message and ask yourself ifthe person might have intended themessage to be received differently.

• Respond with caution. Use othercommunication methods if possible.

Getting What You Want

• Begin on a positive or personal note. Howare you?

• State your purpose.I am writing to follow up about....

• Include action items.Please provide the following by Thursday, May 22,

2014:• Avoid extra words.• End on a positive note.

The Power of Words

Choose Words Carefully

Communication-Connect Message

Every communication is an opportunityfor a powerful connection. Developingyour ability to connect with others:1. Creates better relationships2. Reduces conflict3. Increases accomplishments4. Effectively conveys ideas5. Attracts followers

Central Truths

1. If you want to succeed, you must learn howto connect with others.

2. High achievers care about people, viewsubordinates optimistically, seek advicefrom subordinates, and listen well toeveryone.

3. Maturity is the ability to see and act onbehalf of others.

4. We remember 85% to 90% of what we see;less than 15% of what we hear.

Central Truths

5. Connecting always requires energy; mustintentionally and willingly connect withothers. This requires initiative (go first);clarity (prepared); patience (slow down);selflessness (give); and stamina (recharge).

6. If you are responsible for leading people orcommunicating with others, it is especiallyvital for you to find ways to recharge.

Central Truths

7. A bad beginning makes a bad ending(Euripides).

8. People connect with stories, not statistics.9. It is the job of a leader to bring clarity to a

subject, not complexity.10.Three words are essential to connect with

others: brevity, levity, and repetition.

Central Truths

11.Leadership is about inspiring people todo things they never thought they could.(Steve Jobs)

12.The mediocre teacher tells, the goodteacher explains, and the great teacherdemonstrates.

13.Vision without passion is a picturewithout possibilities.

Central Truths

14.People ask three questions about theirleaders: Do they care for me? Can theyhelp me? Can I trust them?

15.Preparation yields confidence andpassion yields conviction.

Connecting increases your influence in every situation.Successful U.S. Presidents exhibit 5 qualities:1. Vision2. Pragmatism3. Consensus Building4. Charisma5. Trustworthiness

4 of the 5 skills to being asuccessful leader have todo with connecting.

Connecting Principles #1 INFLUENCE

Most people who disconnect aren’t aware.

Connecting Signals

Extra Effortpeople go the extra

mile

UnsolicitedAppreciation

people say positivethings

UnguardedOpenness

people demonstratetrust

IncreasedCommunication

people expressthemselves more

readily

EnjoyableExperiencespeople feel good

about what they aredoing

EmotionalBondednesspeople display aconnection on anemotional level

UnconditionalLove

people are acceptingwithout reservation

Growing Synergypeople’s effectivenessis greater than the sum

of the contributions

Positive Energypeople’s emotional

“batteries” arecharged by being

together

Connecting Principle #1 INFLUENCE

Jay Hall, Ph.D., Teleometrics,conducted a study on the performanceof 16,000 executives.

CONCLUSION: direct correlationbetween achievement and the ability tocare for and connect with people.

“Leadership is not about titles, positions or flowcharts. It is about one life influencing another.” John C. Maxwell

Connecting Principle #1 INFLUENCEConnecting Principle #1 INFLUENCE

HIGH ACHIEVERS LOW ACHIEVERSAVERAGEACHIEVERS

Care about peopleas well as profits

Viewsubordinatesoptimistically

Seek advicefrom thoseunder them

Actively listen

Concentrate onproduction

Focus more ontheir own status

Reluctant to seekadvice from those

under them

Listen only tosuperiors

Preoccupiedwith their own

security

Show a basicdistrust of

subordinates

Do not seekadvice

Avoidcommunication and

rely on policymanuals

Connecting Principle #1 INFLUENCEConnecting Principle #1 INFLUENCE

Modes of Listening

• Combative listening takes place when welisten only to look for flaws in the otherperson’s point of view.

• Passive listening takes place when we trulytry to hear the other person’s point of view.However, with passive listening, we do notyet provide feedback to verify whether wehave understood.

• Active listening takes place when weprovide feedback to verify whether or not wehave understood the sender.

Listening Actively

• Listen with your ears, your eyes, and your heart toconcentrate on what the person is saying and toempathize.

• Pay attention to speaker’s facial expressions andother nonverbal cues for insight into the message.

• Listen without interruption. Note key phrases anddocument the information that the interviewee says.

• Provide feedback checks to the speaker. Restate,paraphrase, or ask questions of the interviewee toconfirm that you received the message as intended.

Examining Body Languageand Behavioral Cues

• Observe what message your body languageconveys:– facial expressions or gestures– shifts in eye contact– crossed arms or legs– placement of feet– excessive sweating

• Be aware of nonverbal messages you send.

Connecting is all about OTHERS and not ourselves.Why do we focus on ourselves and not others?1. ImmaturityMaturity is the ability to see and act on behalf of others2.Ego3.Failure to value everyone

3 Connecting Questions:1.Do you CARE for me?2.Can you HELP me?3.Can I TRUST you?

Connecting Principle #2 OTHERS

Connecting goes beyond words.3 components to face-to-face communication

How others believe what we say when we communicate:

>90% of the impression that we often conveyhas nothing to do with what we actually say!

Connecting Principle #3 COMMUNICATION

WORDS TONE OF VOICE BODY LANGUAGE

Connecting Principle

• Connecting Goes Beyond Words

Communication Breakdowns


Breakdown Thought – knowing Emo4on – feeling Ac4on -‐ doing

Dispassionate I know this I do not feel this

Theore4cal I know this I do not do this

Unfounded I do not know this I feel this

Hypocri4cal I feel this I do not do this

Presumptuous I do not know this I do this

Mechanical I do not feel this I do this

Action – something we do; connectingvisually; what people see

Thought – something we know; connectingintellectually; what people understand

Emotion – something we feel; connectingemotionally; what people feel


Connecting always requires ENERGY.4 Unpardonable sins of a communicator:

3 of the 4 require a lot of effort and energyConnecting requires:1. Initiative – go first!2.Clarity – prepare3.Patience – slow down4.Selflessness – give5.Stamina – recharge

Connecting Principle #4 ENERGY

Unprepared Uncommitted Uninteresting Uncomfortable

Connecting is more SKILL than natural talent.

Connecting Principle #5 SKILL

Connectors connect on common ground.

Barriers to finding common ground:

Connecting Practice #1 COMMON GROUND

Assumption Arrogance

IndifferenceControl

Connecting Practice

Connectors connect on common ground.

Choices to finding common ground:

Connecting Practice #1 COMMON GROUND

Availability Listening

Questions Thoughtfulness

Openness Likeability

Humility Adaptability

Connectors do the difficult work of keeping it SIMPLE.4 components to connect through communication

Connecting Practice #2 Simplicity

Humor Heart Hope Help

Three S Art of Simplicity1.Talk to people, not above them.2.Get to the point.3.Say it over and over and overagain.4.Say it clearly.5.Say less.

Create an EXPERIENCE everyone enjoys.

How to be interesting:1.Take responsibility for your listeners.2.Communicate in their world.3.Capture people’s attention from the start.4.Say it so it sticks.

Connecting Practice #3 EXPERIENCE

Connectors INSPIRE people.Inspiration Equation

Connecting Practice #4 INSPIRE

CREDIBILITY is the currency that connectors have.

Credibility Checklist

1. Have I connected with myself?2. Have I made right my wrongs?3. Am I accountable?4. Do I lead like I live?5. Do I tell the truth?6. Am I vulnerable?7. Am I following the Golden Rule?8. Do I deliver results?

Connecting Practice #5 CREDIBILITY

Application of Concepts

• When communicating, find commonground, make communication simple,capture people’s interest, inspire others,and be real.

• When you communicate, you mustinclude: thought (something I know);emotion (something I feel); and action(something I do).

Application of Concepts

• When communicating, attempt to connecton four levels: visually, intellectually,emotionally, and verbally.

Generational Communication

Conclusions

Presentation WILL BE athttp://gabrielleconsulting.com/FTRIteam2014

Gabrielle - FTRI - Communication -...

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