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A Useful Guide to

Frequently Asked Questions

Confidence through Development

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A Useful Guide to

Frequently Asked

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Written by Pansophix Authors

This edition published May 2011

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ISBN 978-1-906460-38-9

A Useful Guide to




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A Useful Guide to




Contributing Authors

() indicate the topics of the authors‟ Useful Guides. * indicates co-author.

Berry Winter (Create a New You, De-Stress You, Dealing with Difficult

Behaviour* and Resolving Conflict)

Bob Broomfield (Problem Solving)

Bob Shiers (Managing People)

Bryan Edwards (Assertiveness, Customer Service, Interview Success and

Time Management)

Bryan Leslie (Goal Setting)

Carole Railton (Personal Branding)

Charlotte Mannion (Mentoring and Public Speaking)

Chris Carling (Overcoming Anxiety and Work Life Balance)

Eve Winston (Career Development and Diversity)

Harish Davda (Managing Projects)

Ian Clarke (Effective Change, Managing Meetings*, Managing Teams

and Minute Taking*)

Janice Lawrence (Managing Conduct)

Michael Beale (Hypnosis, Networking* and NLP for Coaches)

Stephen Harris (Sales I)

Steve Amos (Dealing with Difficult Behaviour and Interviewing)

Steve Westall (Managing Meetings*, Minute Taking* and Networking*)

Sue Cohen (A Useful Guide to LinkedIn)

Susan Kaer (A Useful Guide to Delegating)

http://www.pansophix.co.uk/product_info.php?products_id=30




































A Useful Guide to




Index of Questions

Assertiveness

How do I tackle a manager who doesn‟t provide me with the opportunities

to develop?

I am frequently asked to take on more work than I can handle but it is

difficult to say "No!" to your boss. What do I do?

My boss put me on this course because he says I‟m aggressive, but I

don‟t shout or swear. Why would he say that?

How can I stand up for myself with a very forceful boss?

When I try to say „No‟ I'm often persuaded to change my mind. How can I

say „No‟ more effectively?

Someone behaves in a way which I really dislike and it makes me

uncomfortable. I‟m nervous about challenging them, as I can imagine

there would be an almighty row if I tried to tell them how rude they are!

What can I do?

Career Development

Although I‟m good at my job, I don‟t seem to get the same recognition as

other colleagues who are no better than me, but seem to have a higher

professional profile. Is there anything I can do to get more recognition?

Is it possible to move from a job in the public sector to a job in the private

sector?

I want to get some project management experience, but there are limited

job opportunities in my current job. What can I do?

I feel stuck in my job because I can‟t seem to find a suitable job

opportunity.

How long should I stay in a job before going for my next promotion

opportunity?

How do I become a trainer?

Create a New You

I feel stuck in a rut. What can I do about it?

Customer Service How do I maintain and develop great ongoing relationships with my

customers?





A Useful Guide to




Dealing with Difficult Behaviour

How do I deal with someone whom, when I tackle him about his behaviour, always responds in the same negative way?

How do I find the right opening for a difficult conversation?

Delegation

It takes longer to delegate than to do the job myself – so what‟s the

point?

A member of my team is reluctant to take on extra responsibility. I think

he has the ability, but he makes comments about not wanting extra

pressure, and once got a bit irritated and said he didn‟t see why he should

do my job when I‟m getting paid for it! He does his own job well, and I

think he could go further, but he doesn‟t seem interested. How should I

deal with him?

Diversity

What does valuing diversity mean?

Isn‟t valuing diversity just common sense?

It‟s all very well doing the right thing but does diversity offer any business benefits?

What is the difference between being a strong firm manager and being a

bully?

Having a diverse team to manage is very challenging. How do I meet

everyone‟s needs?

Effective Change

What‟s the most important thing we must do when we need to make big

changes?

Who are the most important change agents?

Goal Setting

Should I tell other people my goals?

What if I don't know what I want?

How often should I review my goals?

How do you begin goal-setting?

How can you set goals for someone else?

When I don't achieve my goals I feel like a failure - what can I do?

What is the Law of Attraction and how does it relate to Goal-setting?






A Useful Guide to




The form asks for objectives, and then for development objectives. I don‟t

really understand the difference and seem to just end up repeating

myself!

Hypnosis

Is hypnosis relevant for business and professional people?

Interview Success

Does it matter what I wear for the interview? Surely they are judging me on my ability to do the job?

Interviewing

How do I interrupt someone who is rambling off the point and get them

back on track?

How do I keep both my own questions and the interviewee‟s answers on

track?

LinkedIn

Why should I have a picture on my profile – I‟d really like to use my

company logo?

Can I really meet new people online?

Managing Conduct

Why should I spend time and effort to manage conduct? I have lots of

other work demands to deal with and it could damage my working

relationship with my employee.

Why should I keep records about how I manage conduct issues if I am

dealing with them in an informal way?

What should I do if the employee raises a grievance while he/she is being

taken through the formal conduct procedure?

How can I decide on an appropriate outcome from a conduct meeting?

Why shouldn‟t I automatically dismiss an employee for gross misconduct?

Managing Meetings

How can I get better at running my meetings?

Managing People








A Useful Guide to




How do I brief points from my manager that I do not agree with without

being disloyal to the boss or lying to my people?

What is the single most useful thing I can do to make appraisal work for

me and my people?

What should I do when the boss has just shouted abuse at me, again, for

my team‟s “poor performance” and expects me to pass it on?

What should I do with someone in my team that is awkward and

disruptive but does “just enough” work to stay clear of formal discipline?

How can I refuse requests from my boss for me to undertake a totally

unreasonable workload?

I seem to have more than my share of communication mix-ups. How can I

make sure people understand me?

One of my team members performs just well enough to keep himself out

of capability procedures but I constantly have to talk to him about his

poor performance. What‟s the best way of dealing with him?

What do I do if a member of staff has rated their competency higher than

I have? They are meeting but not consistently exceeding the standards

required, and they are a good team worker. I don‟t want the appraisal to

turn into an argument and their work suffers as a result!

Managing Projects

Why has Project Management become important?

Why do projects fail? What can I do to avoid projects failing?

What is dependency in Project Management?

What are project management tools? Why are they useful?

What are the main qualities of a project manager?

Managing Teams

How can I get the team to pull together more effectively?

I have very different types of people in my team. How do I manage them

effectively when they‟re so different?



A Useful Guide to




Mentoring

Surely the mentor‟s role is to help provide some answers for the mentee? Surely this is the least a mentee can expect?

What is the difference between Coaching and Mentoring?

What do mentees gain from having a mentor?

As a mentee what commitment do I need to give to a mentoring

relationship?

How can I make my feedback easy for my mentee and not give offence?

Networking

What is the point of “Networking”? Surely it‟s a request to gain some business or influence?

I don‟t like networking events – why should I go?

I know you are recommending that I build up my contact list but some of

my “contacts” have been off my radar for a long time. Surely they will be

quite shocked and suspicious when I try to make contact?

NLP for Coaches

What is Neuro-Linguistic Programing (NLP)?

What are the benefits of NLP training?

How do I get the most out of an NLP Training?

How do I continue to develop my skill level after an NLP course?

Personal Branding

Why do you always emphasise authenticity?

How do I get recognised in my area of business, so that people come

towards me without me having to go out to them?

Why brand yourself?

Is it true that most face to face communications are decided by body

language?

How does branding work world wide?

Problem Solving

What are the biggest problems customers complain about?

What is the biggest problem preventing companies from providing good

customer care?

What is the biggest barrier to teams working together to fix problems?






A Useful Guide to




How much information should you have available to successfully solve problems?

What happens if no one has past experience in fixing things?

I always seem to approach things in the same old way. How can I unblock

my thinking and be more creative?

Public Speaking

I get very nervous when I have to make a presentation. Is there anything

I can do to calm my nerves beforehand?

I really need some notes in front of me when I am presenting in case I just “freeze up” Is this OK?

Given that a job application form is my “marketing” document why

shouldn‟t I write up my case on 10 pages if I want to?

How can I make sure I don‟t forget what I am going to say when speaking

in public?

How many slides should I use?

Resolving Conflict

What are the most important things to consider when resolving conflict?

Selling

What would you say is the single most important sales technique to

achieve success?

Why do you say successful selling is not about explaining your products or

services?

How do I handle resistance and objections?

How do I overcome the fear of picking up the phone and making that

sales call?

As a salesperson why should I stop selling?

Time Management

I feel overwhelmed with work – what will help me to prioritise?

I have so much to do - how can I make more time?





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Train the Trainer

I‟m going to be delivering training on some really technical topics. What if

I can‟t answer someone‟s question?

Training

How can you ensure that the training works?

Do you run motivation skills training?

Work Life Balance

With so many demands and so much going on, where should I start in

trying to get back on an even keel?


A Useful Guide to




Berry Winter

Berry Winter, author of A Useful Guide to

Create a New You, A Useful Guide to De-

Stress You, A Useful Guide to Managing

Conflict and co-author of A Useful Guide to

Dealing with Difficult Behaviour has extensive

knowledge in creating learning and

development programmes.

Berry is a Director of her own management

training and development company called

JamBerry Ltd.

We offer a wide range of management skills

development and often use experiential

training as part of our portfolio. This means we might take participants into a

kitchen to cook a meal as part of a team building exercise or leadership

development, or use actors and musicians and artists to explore themes such as

communication, interpersonal skills and presentation skills. All of our activities

are interactive and involving.

Berry also provides 1:1 coaching at all levels of business. Working 1:1 gives

much greater flexibility to meet the development needs of individuals and can

increase their effectiveness dramatically in a short space of time. We also offer

on-line coaching, which gives greater flexibility and meaning we are not bound

by geography.

Berry is able to work at a variety of management levels and across a range of

projects from concept and strategy to delivery. Having previously worked for a

number of corporate companies, including BT and a number of marketing related

consultancies, Berry has considerable experience of businesses, both large and

small.

Links

www.jamberry.co.uk

Contact Details

Email: [email protected]

Telephone: +44 (0)800 840 2418

LinkedIn: berrywinter

Twitter: @jamberry Back to Contributing Authors







http://www.jamberry.co.uk/

http://www.jamberry.co.uk/

mailto:[email protected]

http://www.linkedin.com/in/berrywinter

http://twitter.com/JamBerry

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Question 2

Context

When training in Assertiveness or Time Management.

Question

I am frequently asked to take on more work than I can handle but it is difficult

to say "No!" to your boss. What do I do?

Berry‟s Answer

First of all sit down and look at your workload. Are you doing jobs that belong to

anyone else? Could you do things more efficiently?

Next, think about creating a set of criteria that you can use to decide whether to

say "No!" to your boss. For example ...

Is the project mission critical to your team?

What will be the consequences of the job not being done in the longer

term?

Are you the best person to do this job?

Once you have decided on your criteria to accept or reject additional work, work

out how to phrase your response. You might say something like ...

Thank you for the opportunity, but XXX has more knowledge than I do.

How important is this job against the other jobs that I am currently doing?

I would really love to do this project, but I need to clear some space in my

diary to complete it satisfactorily. Can you help me to do that?

There are many ways to say "No!" as long as it is justified and well reasoned.

Back to Index of Questions

A Useful Guide to




Question 2

Context

When coaching people who want to make a change in their life.

Question

I feel stuck in a rut. What can I do about it?

Berry‟s Answer

Start with the little things.

Make a few changes every day to your routine. Gradually over time you can

make the changes bigger as you get more confident.

Remember to mix with exciting and vibrant people so that when you can't see

the wood for the trees you have someone you can bounce ideas off to help you

to take action.

Being stuck in a rut is usually the result of inaction.


A Useful Guide to




Question 3

Context

When training people on making presentations.

Question

I get very nervous when I have to make a presentation. Is there anything I can

do to calm my nerves beforehand?

Berry‟s Answer

1. Make sure you are well prepared. Knowing your subject is one of the keys

to feeling happier when making presentations.

2. Think of your presentation less as a list of facts and more as a story. Work

to create a really good storyline with ups and downs and twists and turns.

This will help to keep your audience engaged.

3. Make sure your visual aids are clear and readable. There is nothing worse

than poorly presented slides to make your audience restless.

4. Try to find a way to relax yourself beforehand. You might try visualisation

- imagining the presentation going really well in advance can seriously

help with nerves.

5. Learn to control your breathing. If you are in control you are likely to be

in control of yourself. Take 3 deep breaths before you go on stage. It will

help calm you and give you impact when you start to talk.


A Useful Guide to




Question 4

Context

When training about working with people.

Question

How do I deal with someone whom, when I tackle him about his behaviour,

always responds in the same negative way?

Berry‟s Answer

If someone gets stuck in their behaviour and responses to particular situations it

may be because they have developed a standard response pattern to that

situation. If this is the case, you need to look first at your own behaviour. Do

you always ask them in the same way? Not just the words, but behavioural

characteristics as well. Dr Eric Berne identified back in the 1950s that there are

three aspects to our personalities that affect us every day. Within all of us we

have the ability to move between these three states continually. They affect the

way in which we behave and in particular the way that we inter-relate to other

people. These three states are the basis of a theory called Transactional

Analysis. Simply put they are:

PARENT- This is where values and opinions lie. We use it when we are looking

after, supporting, judging and taking responsibility for ourselves and others.

ADULT- We use the adult state when being rational, objective and calculating.

Rational decision making and important decisions need this part of the

personality.

CHILD - We use child when we are being emotional, intuitive, creative,

manipulative, rebellious, submissive. We need child in order to have fun, be

spontaneous and inspired.

A fully rounded personality needs all three parts of the personality functioning

and used appropriately.

So when working with someone does the way that you ask them come over as

parental? If you are always playing the "parent" you will come across as always

wanting to be in control. Alternatively, if you get emotional you may be using

your "child" like state. Ideally at work you want to maintain an adult state. this

is not always easy but if you can you are more likely to hook the other person

into this state as well as making the situation easy and more rational to manage.

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The good news is that once we are aware of these different states, and when we

are likely to use them, we can change and choose to adopt a different position.


A Useful Guide to




Question 5

Context

When training about Managing People.

Question

How do I find the right opening for a difficult conversation?

Berry‟s Answer

Whether you are talking to one individual or a crowd, finding the right opening

can be essential to get people on your side.

Need to be persuasive? A cooperative opening might be what you need. A few

examples might be ...

“Let‟s see if we can ...”

“Why don‟t we try this a different way ...”

“Have you got any ideas on ...”

“What would you like to do about this ...”

Asked to express an opinion or encourage someone to change their

behaviour? In these cases, it is a good idea to start with "I". In these cases you

are taking responsibility for your own thoughts and actions and inviting the other

person to consider their own thoughts and position. Examples are ...

“I think ...”

“I would prefer ...”

“I cannot ...”

“I feel ...”

“I want ...”

Empathise with the other person. Empathising with someone can put you in

a stronger position when you have to say something unpleasant or unpalatable.

Combine with the "I" word it can be a powerful opening. Examples might include

...

“I understand that this may not be very important to you but ...”

“You may be too busy now, but ...”

“I appreciate that this is difficult for you ...”

“I can see that you seem worried ...” Back to Index of Questions

A Useful Guide to




Question 6

Context

During Resolving Conflict training.

Question

What are the most important things to consider when Resolving Conflict?

Berry‟s Answer

1. Consider the underlying causes. Is it obvious why someone is upset?

2. Let them vent - give people space to get things off their chest

3. Pause before you react. This will give you thinking time.

4. Check your own behaviour. Is it part of the problem?

5. Listen.

6. Acknowledge that they may be correct in part of their concern.

7. Be willing to negotiate if appropriate.

8. Remain assertive.

9. Stay in adult. Avoid competing.

10. Look for warning and danger signs. Check your distances.


A Useful Guide to




Bob Broomfield

Bob Broomfield, author of A Useful Guide to

Problem Solving, has 30 years experience in the

Telecommunications industry with roles ranging

from Engineering to Project Management to

Sales Account Management.

He has worked for the last 10 years in Business

Transformation specialising in Customer

Satisfaction, Cost Reduction, and Organisational

Governance.

Bob has an MBA focusing on Change, Quality

and Service Excellence. He has also developed his own business model for

behavioural measurement which he is currently developing into a book.

Bob also works as an associate coach and trainer.

When not writing or with clients Bob spends his time sailing, swimming, cycling,

with his family narrow boating or escaping to the countryside.

Links

www.bobbroomfield.co.uk

Contact Details


Telephone: 07722 410654

Back to Contributing Authors



http://www.bobbroomfield.co.uk/


A Useful Guide to




Question 7

Context

Customer Complaints about Service training.

Question

What are the biggest problems customers complain about?

Bob‟s Answer

I will answer this question by talking about the principles of what customers

want rather than specific problems as each product and service are different but

the basic needs are the same.

Priority 1. It may seem a bit obvious but the most important thing is for the

service or product to work as expected.

Note: This does not necessarily mean work as advertised.

If it is a product then the set up needs to be simple and quick and the product

needs to work first time. A service needs to be delivered on time with minimum

hassle.

The product or service needs to be reliable and the product features or the

service value adds must meet the user expectations.

Priority 2. The product or service should be simple to understand, easy to

order, and provide value for money (as defined by the customer).

Increasingly customers learn about products and make buying decisions based

on web sites. Whether the customer is using an on-line experience, telephone,

or visiting a store ...

Product features should be easy to understand.

There should not be any hidden costs.

There should be simple to use on-line ordering or staff that know their

product

If a product is advertised then customers expect it to be in stock.

If there is a delivery date then the company needs to meet its

commitment

Bills should be simple and clear and payment should be painless.

Priority 3. Product Service Support

If something goes wrong or customers need help then they need to be able to

contact someone or get easy access to useful practical information. i.e. ...

A Useful Guide to




Call centre agents that understand the problem and have empathy rather

than reading from a script

Web site or user guide that is simple and does not use Jargon

A commitment to do something to help

Set expectations on how long it is going to take (to fix the problem etc)

A clear commitment to keep the customer updated on progress.


A Useful Guide to




Question 8

Context

Customer Complaints about Service training.

Question

What is the biggest problem preventing companies from providing good

customer care?

Bob‟s Answer

In times of recession or difficult markets there is a strong focus on reducing

costs and staffing needs to be efficient. Resourcing and stock constraints can

lead to a number of common problems.

Meeting peak demand from a resource point of view is difficult if there is no

regular pattern for volumes or a “one off” high demand. Therefore individual

customers may get a one off poor experience.

Lack of stock can impact the buying experience i.e. the excitement of deciding

to buy something and then finding out you have to wait for a week before it

becomes available. Keeping high levels of stock is expensive.

Maintaining knowledge. A high turnover of staff will mean that key knowledge

can be lost and staff will be stretched while new team members are recruited.

Lack of information or lack of easy access to the right information can make it

difficult to help customers.


A Useful Guide to




Question 9

Context

This question is about getting help within a company to work together and fixing

problems.

Question

What is the biggest barrier to teams working together to fix problems?

Bob‟s Answer

Working methods have changed as a result of technology. Different functional

departments no longer need to be in the same office, same city, or even same

country. This means that the operation uses technology for communication but

the personal touch that comes from working closely with other people can be

lost.

The other factor is that if teams are so busy dealing with the problems on a day

to day basis that they are not focused on how to makes things better.

Finally, the most difficult barrier is apathy. Some individuals will want to see a

clear benefit for them before they are willing to engage and this needs to be

factored into your plans.


A Useful Guide to




Question 10

Context

This question is about data gathering to prove problems exist.

Question

How much information should you have available to successfully solve problems?

Bob‟s Answer

Companies with customer problems tend to break down into two groups ...

1. Those that have little or no measures in place of how their processes are

performing.

2. Those where lots of data gets produced but not the right measures to fix

the problems. The existing data shows a good performance and therefore

it is difficult to gain agreement that there is a problem.

Here are some key points in getting useful data ...

You need a single agreed set of facts with a clear path back to the source

of the data so the facts can be understood. Too many times I have seen

three separate reports that tell a conflicting story but all claim to come

from the same source.

Data should have a reference to the date the data was gathered.

Where a lot of data is already produced, be clear what data is useful and

relevant and what data isn‟t.

The bottom line is “Does the data help?”


A Useful Guide to




Question 11

Context

Someone who was involved in changing the way orders are managed raising a

concern over their ability to make change happen.

Question

What happens if no one has past experience in fixing things?

Bob‟s Answer

Problem solving is about breaking down the issues into a number of simple

manageable steps.

In simple terms ...

Talking to people (to get their view)

Write stuff down (so that it can be understood and challenged)

Work the problem through (step by step)

Agree the issues and agree that you are making progress

Think success


A Useful Guide to




Bob Shiers

Bob Shiers, author of A Useful Guide to

Managing People, lives in Suffolk, near to the

sea.

He's had 15 years experience in the Food

Industry culminating in managing what was

then the largest food processing plant in

Europe. He maintained good relations with 850

people and excellent returns for the

shareholders.

Following this success he spent 14 years with

the Industrial Society helping to promote best

practice in Leadership and Management. Since

then he has worked as a freelance trainer and

believes that treating people correctly is essential to the success of any

enterprise.

He's a member of the Institute of Leadership and Management.

When he not writing or delivering training he spends time with his family, sails

and cooks.



A Useful Guide to




Question 12

Context

During training on communication in general and team briefing in particular.

Question

How do I brief points from my manager that I do not agree with without being

disloyal to the boss or lying to my people?

Bob‟s Answer

First ask yourself if you fully understand the boss's point and their reasons

for stating it. Did they explain it to you properly? It could be that it's not

as daft as it sounds once you have all the facts and reasons, and if so,

problem solved!

If you still disagree despite your boss's best efforts to sell it to you,

explain it to your team using all the facts and reasons the boss used on

you. Speak as if it is coming from you. Say it objectively. It may well

work on the team. It could be that you are in a minority of one, and if so,

problem solved! Never say anything like "I hate this but it says here I

have to tell you ..."

The most difficult thing is when; having done all of the above, one of the

team asks directly what you think of it. The only way I know is to be

honest. You don't have to agree with everything the boss says but you do

have to support the "party line". It's not a popularity contest. You might

say something like "I have discussed this in detail with the boss. Whilst

this way is not my first choice, I will do my utmost to make it work and

know that you will do your best to help me."


A Useful Guide to




Question 13

Context

During In House Appraisal training where some people find the process helpful

and motivating and others find it a boring chore inflicted on them by HR.

Question

What is the single most useful thing I can do to make appraisal work for me and

my people?

Bob‟s Answer

Don‟t see appraisal as an annual event.

Helping your people to develop and succeed is a year round process. Even if you

see them and speak to them every day about things in general, make time to

talk to them, one to one, every month or so about their personal development

and progress.

Ask them about three things ...

1. How‟s it (the job) going? You probably do this all the time.

2. How are you (the human)? It could be that the job is 100% but the

human is hanging on by the fingernails or is bored due to lack of a

challenge.

3. How are we doing with the objectives we agreed at the last appraisal?

Keep some notes. Make sure that you and the team member are achieving

the points you agreed. If the things you agreed have been overtaken by events,

change them. Be sure to give credit where due, and record it.

The “annual event” will then become a less daunting affair that will really be just

a summary and recording of all the conversations you have had through the

year.


A Useful Guide to




Question 14

Context

During Leadership Training.

Question

What should I do when the boss has just shouted abuse at me, again, for my

team‟s “poor performance” and expects me to pass it on?

Bob‟s Answer

The easiest thing in the world to do would be to simply pass on the abuse, but

will that help you to hit your targets?

Think about the outcome you need and the best ways to get it, then, act as a

filter. That is, decide whether and how to pass on the boss‟s abuse.

You will probably decide that passing on abuse will have the same effect on your

people as it had on you, and at best will create a short burst of not necessarily

useful activity.


A Useful Guide to




Question 15

Context

During leadership training.

Question

What should I do with someone in my team that is awkward and disruptive but

does “just enough” work to stay clear of formal discipline?

Bob‟s Answer

Firstly, think about why they behave as they do. Not that many people are born

to be awkward, they usually have a reason, even if a very poor one! It could be

that they felt they should have been promoted instead of you, or even your

predecessor. It may be something that happened years ago! Remember that it

is the perception of an injustice or whatever that drives their behaviour. Even if

it is not true, they sincerely believe that it is.

Try to find out the reason for their behaviour. Ask them about it. You may well

not be able to find out the reason, or to right the perceived wrong, but if you can

discover why they are so awkward, it will help you to understand them better

and to decide handle them.

The bottom line is however, that they may well be upsetting the teamwork and

hence the productivity in your section, which of course it‟s your job to maintain.

If they are upsetting their team mates, the others will expect you to sort it.

You need to establish and maintain acceptable standards of performance AND

behaviour. Doing just enough work whilst disrupting team work is not

acceptable behaviour.

Take them aside and describe the behaviour that you wish them to change.

(You will almost certainly not change their underlying beliefs and values but be

you need them to change their behaviour). Make sure to talk about their

behaviour, not their personality. Be objective.

Describe the effect of their behaviour on the job.

Tell them what behaviour you need from them in future. This is what YOU need,

you are the boss.

Tell them how great it will be if they comply

Arrange to meet with them regularly, quite frequently at first to discuss their

progress. Give credit where due and redirection as required.

A Useful Guide to




If improvement is noted continue to keep an eye on they situation. Do not

tolerate backsliding!

If no improvement is forthcoming seek advice from H.R. on use of the formal

discipline procedure.


A Useful Guide to




Question 16

Context

During leadership training.

Question

How can I refuse requests from my boss for me to undertake a totally

unreasonable workload?

Bob‟s Answer

Firstly, be sure that you really do want to refuse. Is it really unreasonable or

just the occasional request for help in peak periods? Does the boss realise that

it‟s unreasonable – are they aware of your current workload?

Most of us accept, and appreciate a bit of give and take at work so let‟s assume

this request really is unreasonable.

Bosses are only human and sometimes don‟t realise that you are already at full

stretch. They should also be pretty good at prioritising and will usually be happy

to take another job away or extend its deadline so you can do what they need

now. Communication is a wonderful thing!

Obviously, refusing a request from the boss may not improve your standing with

them and whether to do it is up to you. Let‟s take an example of a request that

even the most demanding boss may shrink from. (This actually happened). A

young man was requested to come to work for a “couple of hours” on the way to

his wedding. The boss knew it was his wedding day. This a bit extreme but the

same principles apply to less dramatic circumstances.

The bride groom decided that this was a definite case for a refusal, but trying to

be reasonable, he explained numerous reasons why he could not work that day.

They included things like collecting the hire car for the honeymoon, the need to

be in his wedding suit, not his overalls, he had promised to pick up the best man

and so on. The boss had an answer to all of them and the bridegroom was

running out of ideas!

Reflect for a moment on the consequences of the bridegroom caving in at this

point. Not good?

Instead of giving a lot of reasons, which can be argued with, what if he had

simply said, “Sorry boss, not Saturday”, and when pressed had said, “Sorry boss

not Saturday” and then, “Sorry boss, not Saturday”. Difficult to argue, isn‟t it?

A Useful Guide to




To demonstrate goodwill, he could make a helpful suggestion for instance, "I

could work late on Wednesday instead." or, "I could get Fred to do it instead."

However, the bottom line remains simply, "Sorry boss, not Saturday".


A Useful Guide to




Bryan Edwards

Bryan Edwards, author of A Useful Guide to

Assertiveness, A Useful Guide to Customer Service, A

Useful Guide to Interview Success and A Useful Guide

to Time Management graduated from University of

Wales, Aberystwyth in 1981 and taught Maths and

Physics in a comprehensive school for 5 years.

A change of career direction resulted in Bryan

becoming a graduate of the Chartered Institute of

Personnel and Development (CIPD) at Kingston

Business School.

He started his personnel career at Safeways in 1987, managing the Human

Resource function of a £8m turnover store.

In 1989, Bryan joined the House of Fraser department store group as a store-

based Training Manager. After 2 years he was promoted to Head Office Training

Manager, where for 8 years he managed the training and development function.

Bryan's most recent corporate experience was as Training Manager at Tiny

Computers. He managed a team of 6 trainers and was also responsible for

designing, delivering and evaluating a suite of management training

programmes for 170 Showroom Managers and Team Leaders at Head Office.

Bryan delivered over 100 management training courses in a 13 month period.

He implemented the first companywide training needs analysis and developed an

innovative system of training evaluation involving senior line managers in

assessing the knowledge/skill improvement in their delegates.

Bryan has worked as a freelance trainer for the last 10 years and has recently

set up his own training company. Bryan designs and delivers training for a range

of clients both commercial, public and charity sectors. He has also designed

learning materials for a diverse range of organisations including Mothercare,

British Bakeries and Nuffield Hospitals.

When he is not writing or with clients Bryan spends his time gardening,

designing web sites. His two daughters seem to take up any remaining time!

Links

www.abctrainingsolutions.biz








http://www.abctrainingsolutions.biz/

A Useful Guide to




Contact Details


Telephone: 07747 602215



A Useful Guide to




Question 17

Context

When delivering assertiveness training.

Question

My boss put me on this course because he says I‟m aggressive, but I don‟t shout

or swear. Why would he say that?

Bryan‟s Answer

Perhaps you need to clarify what he means, by asking for specific examples

where he feels you have been aggressive.

There can be a lot of confusion between aggressive and assertive behaviour.

Aggression is not always about swearing and raised voices. In fact, I have come

across lots of mild-mannered aggressive people at work – they don‟t shout or

swear - however the recipient of the behaviour feels aggrieved as a result of it.

I emailed a colleague once and started the mail with: “Hope you‟re okay, part

timer!” This was meant to be light hearted banter between 2 colleagues who (I

thought) knew each other quite well. His response indicated that he felt very

different about my intentions and was quite aggrieved as a result.

The issue behind this lay in his perceived feelings of being undervalued by the

team and department.


A Useful Guide to




Question 18

Context

When delivering a variety of training.

Question

How do I become a trainer?

Bryan‟s Answer

My route was slightly unconventional, although has a clear, related pattern. I

used to be a comprehensive teacher teaching Physics and Maths! In my late

twenties I decided that I needed a career change and so re-trained by going

back to college full time to gain my Chartered Institute of Personnel and

Development qualifications. I then returned to work as a Personnel Manager

before moving into full time training with various commercial organisations.

I believe there are 2 very credible routes into training – study for the C.I.P.D.

qualifications (part time or full time) to build your c.v., or build your experience

in training via your existing job - even if it is only a few hours per month.

Perhaps you could ...

Engineer a training project with your boss as part of your annual appraisal

(most bosses say their staff could do with some kind of extra training e.g.

refresher training on the systems).

Encourage the company to send you on some courses (e.g. train the

trainer/ presentation skills/ coaching skills)

Make yourself, and your career potential, known to the training or human

resources department so that they can look out for opportunities for you.


A Useful Guide to




Question 19

Context

When delivering a variety of training.

Question

How do I tackle a manager who doesn‟t provide me with the opportunities to

develop?

Bryan‟s Answer

First of all you need to feel that you have a right to tackle them about the issue

in the first place. I often ask myself a question: “Am I on a platform of rights to

ask for this?” If the answer is „yes‟, it gives me that edge of confidence to tackle

the situation in the first place.

When you challenge them, don‟t come across in a manner that could be

perceived as „finger wagging/ telling them off‟ that they are not doing their job

properly. Tact and diplomacy is key.

The starting point is preparation - thinking through when and how you will talk

to them. What words will you use? What will their reaction be? How will you

overcome any objections they come up with?

Tackle the boss assertively i.e. appreciate that they are busy/ under pressure

however you want to help develop the department and are keen to get on

yourself. Sell any benefits to the boss of getting development i.e. what is it you

will be able to do as a result of the development, or what benefits will there be

for the department.

If at first you don‟t succeed, try again a few weeks later. Persistence often pays

off!


A Useful Guide to




Question 20

Context

When consulting with clients about interpersonal and managerial training.

Question

How can you ensure that the training works?

Bryan‟s Answer

It is true that this is more difficult to prove in interpersonal/ managerial skills

training than say sales training, where there should be a resultant uplift in sales

as a result of the training.

In addition to the „happy sheet‟ (course evaluation form) that participants

complete at the end of a course, I use a skill measurement form called a

„knowledge/ skill checklist‟.

This lists all the competencies (knowledge, skills) being developed on the course

and asks participants to complete a 1-5 rating (1=no knowledge/ skill to

5=highly competent) both before and after the course.

There is always an increase in the 2 totals. By then working out the percentage

increase in change, a quantifiable effect of the learning can be established. The

method can also be used to measure demonstration of skills and knowledge

improvement in the job itself.


A Useful Guide to




Question 21

Context

When delivering leadership and management skills training.

Question

Do you run motivation skills training?

Bryan‟s Answer

No. I am not a great advocate of specific motivation skills courses. I feel that if

managers put leadership and management skills into practice, and display

appropriate leadership qualities themselves, then this is the best chance that

they will get full commitment from a highly developed, motivated team.


A Useful Guide to




Bryan Leslie

Bryan is a highly experienced Coach, Leader and

Motivator specialising in Leadership, Management

and Team Working coaching and training.

He enjoys working with individual and corporate

clients who set "impossible" goals, because he

believes that by aiming for the impossible you

achieve the improbable.

Bryan founded “Abacus Coaching Ltd” which

specialises in Personal and Corporate Development

through Coaching and Training.

His background combines fourteen years of line

management with a blend of Operational Management, Consultancy and Human

Resources experience in the Standard Life Assurance Company, Standard Life

Bank and Royal Bank of Scotland plc.

He is accredited by the ...

Corporate and Executive Coaching Company as an Executive Coach

Coaching Academy as a Life Coach.

He is also certified by the University of Strathclyde in Coach Training and

Performance Coaching.

Links

www.bryanleslie.com

Contact Details


Telephone: 07919 385777


http://www.bryanleslie.com/


A Useful Guide to




Question 22

Context

One-to-one coaching.

Question

Should I tell other people my goals?

Bryan‟s Answer

The best answer here is that it depends on the goal!

There is an added motivation to succeed if someone else is asking you how

you‟re getting on, and this works well with goals to do with losing weight.

However, if the goal is to “find Mr or Mrs Right”, or to start a family, you may be

putting a bit too much pressure on yourself.

Also, think about whether the people you tell really want to hear about your

progress on an ongoing basis.

You should only tell people that will support you in your progress to the goal,

and will hold you accountable for achieving the goal.

This may (or may not) be your partner, but it is likely to be someone close to

you, that cares for you, and wants you to succeed.


A Useful Guide to




Question 23

Context

Personal confidence training.

Question

What if I don't know what I want?

Bryan‟s Answer

The most common answer to my question “what do you want?” is “I don‟t

know”.

If this is the case for you, I recommend you start to list all the things you do

NOT want.

Get a pen and pad, and write non-stop for at least five minutes everything you

don‟t want, now or in the future, in your life. Include possessions, people,

feelings, memories, etc.

Once you‟ve stopped writing, look through the list.

What you want is likely to be the exact opposite of some of the statements in

your list.

For example, a lot of people say to me “I don‟t want to feel unhappy”; the

opposite of this is “I want to be happy” and this becomes a want.


A Useful Guide to




Question 24

Context

Leadership skills training.

Question

How often should I review my goals?

Bryan‟s Answer

Once written, I recommend you read through your goals every morning (it also

helps to re-write them every morning as well), and review your goals every

night, just before bedtime.

The Daily Review includes an update of progress made on the goals, and also

helps formulate plans for the next few days and should take no more than ten

minutes per day.

As well as the Daily Review, goals should be reviewed monthly to make sure

they are still relevant, and to add some more goals in when some have been

completed.

The Monthly Review can be scheduled for a weekend and typically takes about

an hour to complete.


A Useful Guide to




Question 25

Context


Question

How do you begin goal-setting?

Bryan‟s Answer

Goal-setting starts with you identifying an area of your life, or an issue you

have, that you want to improve.

The next step is to get clear on what it is you want, in as much detail as

possible; the more specific you are with what you want the better.

Ask questions here such as “what does success in this area look, sound or feel

like?”, or “if I could have anything I wanted here, what would it be?”

Grab a pen and pad, and write down everything you want in life. Don‟t worry

about whether you think you can achieve them yet, just write out a wish list.

From this wish list you can start to craft your goals in the areas that are most

important to you.


A Useful Guide to




Question 26

Context

Leadership skills training.

Question

How can you set goals for someone else?

Bryan‟s Answer

As a Leader or Manager you are responsible for setting targets (or goals) for

people in your team, and you can set goals for people by involving them in

detailing the “how” they will be achieved.

Your team want you to tell them what is expected of them, so you should be

absolutely clear in what you do expect by setting SMART goals (see A Useful

Guide to Goal Setting for more details about SMART).

Having told your team the “what” that is expected of them, you need to involve

each person in the “how” as this is where your team will want to be involved.

Give as much freedom to each person in deciding how they will achieve their

targets/goals; if there are any rules that have to be followed make sure you let

people know (e.g. state budget figures, be clear on each person‟s authority to

proceed before referring to you, etc).




A Useful Guide to




Question 27

Context

Personal confidence training.

Question

When I don't achieve my goals I feel like a failure - what can I do?

Bryan‟s Answer

A simple tip here is to change what the word “goal” means.

Very few people will achieve every goal they set for themselves, but everyone

who sets a goal will always get a result or an outcome.

The word goal gives the impression of “pass or fail” with no room for nearly

achieving it, whereas a result is exactly that – an outcome that can be reviewed

against the target.

The result may not be the result you wanted, but it means that you did achieve

something and you can use your learning to do something different next time.

If your goal was to lose three kilograms in weight in a month, and you lose two

kilograms, you got a result in the right direction, and can now set a new

goal/result for the next month.


A Useful Guide to




Question 28

Context


Question

What is the Law of Attraction and how does it relate to Goal-setting?

Bryan‟s Answer

The Law of Attraction simply says that you attract into your life whatever you

think about.

Goal setting uses this law by ensuring you think about what you want, and if you

review your goals daily this means you will attract what you want.

The key to the Law of Attraction is the last six letters: ACTION.

Nothing will be achieved by sitting and thinking about something, you‟ve got to

take some action.

For example, you can set a goal of winning £10 on the lottery, but to stand a

chance you‟ve got to take action and at least buy a ticket!

There are some guides to the Law of Attraction that state you only have to think

about something and it will come true; my experience is you will only achieve

what you want if having decided what you want, you focus on it and take

positive action to achieve it.


A Useful Guide to




Carole Railton FRSA

For the past ten years Carole, author of A Useful

Guide to Personal Branding, has been doing ground-

breaking work as a behaviourist, specialising in

identity and behaviour including body language. She

uses her skills to help people maximise their potential

socially and in the world of business.

After being a high flyer in the business world – she

worked for Rank Xerox for ten years, first in sales

then as training manager and finally managing sales

operations in nine Middle Eastern countries – Carole Railton set up her own

consultancy www.livingsuccess.co.uk for individuals to help them understand

who they are and how they can influence others.

Then came www.lifeafterbranding.com for companies who want their staff to

have a better relationship with themselves and the organisations and clients

they work with. These have been so successful that she now works with another

personal brander in the States to offer the best of both worlds.

Carole has in depth knowledge of many different cultures. She has worked in 47

countries including the States, South Africa, the Middle East and the UK as an

employee and a consultant and has travelled to many more in search of

understanding about how people interact. This global perspective makes her

books A Useful Guide to Personal Branding and The Future of Body Language

(how to communicate effectively using new technology) essential reading for

anyone wanting to establish contact with people around the world. Her

experience in all tiers of business – from sales, recruitment, training and

management for companies including IBM and Datapoint – makes these

invaluable tools for people working in all areas of business.

Along the way Carole has collected many qualifications (NLP Master,

Homeopathy, Coaching for Business, Directive Breathing) and her social life,

including the organisations she belongs to, is tied up with her working life. She

is a Fellow of The Royal Society of Arts, a member of Wise Women Network and

she supports the elimination of poverty worldwide.

Carole lives in Central London, but travels extensively giving talks, doing

workshops and radio appearances and writing for women‟s magazines on topics

such as flirting.



http://www.livingsuccess.co.uk/

http://www.lifeafterbranding.com/


http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/1906316627/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_tl?ie=UTF8&tag=pansoonlin-21&linkCode=as2&camp=1634&creative=6738&creativeASIN=1906316627

A Useful Guide to




Links

www.facebook.com/carolerailtononline Free body language tips

www.lifeafterbranding.com Company website

www.livingsuccess.co.uk Carole‟s personal website

www.focus.com Expert

www.selfgrowth.com Expert

Contact Details


Telephone: + 44 (0) 7866531400

Skype: carolerailton


http://www.facebook.com/carolerailtononline

http://www.lifeafterbranding.com/

http://www.livingsuccess.co.uk/

http://www.focus.com/

http://www.selfgrowth.com/


A Useful Guide to




Question 29

Context

When training on personal branding.

Question

Why do you always emphasise authenticity?

Carole‟s Answer

Quite simply, it encourages other to reciprocate. This in turn brings a sense of

reality and freedom to all communications in social and business transactions.


A Useful Guide to




Question 30

Context

When working with a new client there is often a fear about getting recognised in

their field for what they do. Most people think it takes years to do this, when in

fact there are things you can do to fast forward this.

Question

How do I get recognised in my area of business, so that people come towards

me without me having to go out to them?

Carole‟s Answer

By becoming an expert, as experts get acknowledged. Teaching and public

speaking are one of the quickest ways to get recognised. PR, getting on

discussion panels in your industry are two more ways of making things happen

quickly, and I urge you to use at least 3 of these.


A Useful Guide to




Question 31

Context

At my last public talk, even before I began talking I got asked ...

Question

Why brand yourself?

Carole‟s Answer

Everyone is significant!

Everyone deserves to be heard and seen by the rest of the world for what they

have to offer. What can be better than everyone successfully achieving,

supporting and serving?

It gets people where they ought to be.

Personal branding is a powerful tool that is used to promote you as an individual

and it represents your promise of how will run your life and what others can

expect of you.


A Useful Guide to




Question 32

Context

My focus is branding and identity. I have a book The Future of Body Language -

how to communicate effectively on multimedia. This has lead to work in very

advanced technological companies, where they may have lost sight of the need

for body language understanding and skills. It‟s important to realise that at the

end of every piece of equipment is a person ...

Question

Is it true that most face to face communications are decided by body language?

Carole‟s Answer

Albert Mehrabian notes body language when expressing feelings or attitudes in a

face to face situation is 7% what you say, 38% your tone and 55% how you look

with your body language. Most other scholars and I agree that at least 55% of

face to face communications come from body language, however, you cannot

get away from it even when you are not seen.

When you‟re on the phone it is important not to bend over or slouch as you

compromise your voice, hence your singing teacher always telling you to stand

tall.

You could try this now.

Bend right over and say good afternoon, now stand straight and say good

afternoon, there is a difference in your voice and tone and how it‟s perceived in

these two instances.

A more erect body carries a voice that is more commanding and persuasive.

Yes, body language is a skill that you need an awareness of no matter where

you are.

For example using the telephone without a camera, you need to be aware what

signals are being relayed.

Both feet on the floor whilst on the phone gives you a better chance of

influencing others, especially if you have your shoulders back and are sitting

erect.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/1906316627/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_tl?ie=UTF8&tag=pansoonlin-21&linkCode=as2&camp=1634&creative=6738&creativeASIN=1906316627

A Useful Guide to




Remember the last time you rang someone at midday on a Sunday and when

they spoke you immediately realised they were still in bed? How did you do

that?

Because you were picking up their body language over the phone.

There are even video conferencing facilities that register your blood pressure

and suggest how relaxed you are, so it makes sense to start being relaxed and

aware right now, before we all use this new technology in our over the internet

communications.


A Useful Guide to




Question 33

Context

I had already done some coaching with the directors and training with the

managers in the UK of one of my favourite corporate clients. They were

preparing me to visit one of their overseas offices to deliver the same training.

Question

How does branding work world wide?

Carole‟s Answer

Your brand is your reputation, as many corporate companies such as Virgin and

Apple have found.

As it is an increasingly complex and competitive environment in which we

operate, we have different classes, cultural backgrounds, different experiences

and beliefs operating from different counties and sometimes from many different

countries which we experience as we travel round.

We all have values and beliefs that can be met by a lifestyle, product or services

from somewhere. It‟s up to 'brands' to find their clients and more and more

they are using the internet which in general is without boundaries.

Brands cross cultural and country boundaries, although they do need to be

aware of local differences.

One of the big banks bases its whole advertising campaign on these differences

whilst showing it can serve the world.


A Useful Guide to




Charlotte Mannion

Charlotte Mannion, author of A Useful Guide to

Mentoring and A Useful Guide to Public Speaking, is the

founder and a director of Quicklearn - a communications

consultancy based in Wiltshire.

Charlotte works as a mentor, coach and facilitator

helping people to communicate better in both their

writing and through public speaking.

Charlotte first trained as an actor and spent much of her

theatre career appearing in repertory companies mostly

in the north of England. This background has enabled her to use her love of

words and performing to help others deliver confident and comfortable

presentations.

Having attended a number of networking events and conferences she realised

that for many people preparing and delivering a speech in this situation was a

very new and often frightening experience; an experience for which there

seemed to be little support or access to training.

Charlotte‟s approach to learning relies on her students „learning by doing‟. Above

all she believes in making that learning both memorable and fun.

Charlotte is married with three grown up children. She is a member of Rotary

and enjoys working with others to raise money for charitable causes. Charlotte is

an enthusiastic public speaker and the artistic director of the Ridgeway Theatre

Company where she keeps her hand in directing productions of different and

unusual plays. She loves walking in the country and food (if someone else is

cooking!)

Links

www.quicklearn.co.uk

Contact Details


Telephone: 01793 790331





http://www.quicklearn.co.uk/

http://www.quicklearn.co.uk/


A Useful Guide to




Question 34

Context

When running a mentoring workshop there are number of concerns people have

about the role and what value they bring to the partnership. A key issue to

always around what is perceived about the differences with coaching.

Question

What is the difference between Coaching and Mentoring?

Charlotte‟s Answer

There is a lot of debate around coaching and mentoring, the similarities and the

differences.

The techniques and skills employed are not very different. Asking thought

provoking questions are important for both roles.

Certainly nowadays there is more recognition that a manager will coach team

members, helping them to learn new skills and encouraging them to think

through ways of improving performance or productivity.

It is normally a short term learning environment and stops once the staff

member has mastered the new skills.

Most obvious examples would be helping a coachee to deliver a presentation, set

themselves worthwhile objectives, or manage a particular time management

issue.

The mentor on the other hand seldom has line management responsibilities.

Mentors are more likely to concentrate on helping their mentees achieve within

their chosen career path.

The Mentor can provide a sounding board and can challenge thoughts and ideas

to help the mentee gain a greater understanding of their aspirations and how

they can achieve them.


A Useful Guide to




Question 35

Context

During a Becoming a Mentor workshop.

Question

What do mentees gain from having a mentor?


When we ask mentees what they want from a mentor the overriding request for

someone with they can to share ideas with, someone who will listen to their

problems and issues, help wherever possible and be a friend to their business.

However they also want their mentor to have relevant business experience so

they don‟t have to spend too long explaining the background to a situation.

They look for someone who is able to listen well, ask the right kind of questions

listen to the answers without making judgements.

They want a mentor who can commit to give their time on a regular basis and

who is open minded.

A mentor needs to inspire and to motivate without telling the mentee what to do

and of course they need to be trustworthy and professional in their approach.


A Useful Guide to




Question 36

Context

Presentation skills workshop for Networkers.

Question

How can I make sure I don‟t forget what I am going to say when speaking in

public?


The answer in a word is preparation. And a second is practice. Too many

people believe that other people deliver their speech almost on a whim when the

truth is they have both prepared and practised their presentation very carefully.

Using mind mapping helps you remember. Working with the brain your ideas

can spiral from the key areas and by drawing them out into a mind map and

preferably using colour you will have a set of notes on one A4 sheet no larger

than a place mat.

The fear of forgetting is more limiting than actually forgetting. No one would

mind if you admitted that you had briefly lost your train of thought. Your

audience might cringe though if you spent ages rummaging through your notes

or, even worse, your slides.

Fear of forgetting though changes everything. Your breathing is affected forcing

your voice to a higher register, your mouth dries up so you feel you cannot

swallow and your eye sight can become blurred making note reading difficult.

Again preparation and practise are the best way to overcome your fears.

Pilots do not fear flying because they do so much preparation in advance so they

know what they can do whatever the eventuality. Commercial pilots also

practise every six months handling a variety of difficult situations in a simulator

so they can never get caught out.

If you prepare carefully and practise assiduously you will never have a problem

with forgetting where you are and what you want your audience to learn.


A Useful Guide to




Question 37

Context

Introduction to mentoring within an organisation looking to match mentors and

mentees.

Question

As a mentee what commitment do I need to give to a mentoring relationship?


Firstly think about what you would like to gain from the experience of being

mentored. European guidelines on good mentoring state that mentoring without

a real and meaningful purpose will not only be ineffective but could also cause a

relationship to not even get off the starting blocks.

You will have to work at the relationship and believe in the benefit to be

successful. Again the Guidelines state “The more an individual believes in self-

managed learning and being in control of their own life, the more progress they

will make with a mentor”. The document goes on to state that a person taking

this approach is more likely to benefit from mentoring than someone who

believes that their fate rests in the hands of others.

Find the right person for you and before making your choice meet with the

proposed mentor and discuss what you would like to gain from the experience.

This will not only show whether or not you are on the same wavelength and if it

can be achieved but it should also help tell you whether you could both get along

enough for you to benefit from the learning.

Chances are that some of your concerns and anxieties have been felt by your

mentor. Use the time to discuss some of these issues and at least you will know

that you are not alone.

The meetings should be treated as confidential and so comments should remain

between the two of you. Ask as many questions as you can, ensure that they

are in the mentor‟s remit and answer any questions the mentor may ask you

truthfully. Remember, they are there to help you.

Many people would love to have a mentor. So if you are lucky enough to be

offered one do not waste the opportunity. If you find you cannot attend a

meeting let the mentor know in advance and reschedule. Failing to do so could

have serious repercussions: the mentor may decide it is just not worth doing it

anymore and you and future employees would have just lost a valuable resource

of knowledge. Back to Index of Questions

A Useful Guide to




Question 38

Context

During a mentor supervision meeting.

Question

How can I make my feedback easy for my mentee and not give offence?


First of all don‟t use the so called sandwich method of giving constructive

feedback. This is when you start by praising the person‟s strengths or abilities

this is the first slice of bread. Then you tell them where they can improve which

is the filling (possibly indigestible) and finally you slap on the top piece of bread

and praise them again so they go away apparently feeling great about

themselves.

This method doesn‟t work for anyone but the feedback giver! The moment

someone starts telling me about my strengths I can hear the ‟but‟ coming like a

runaway train. It is always pretty feeble generalities in the praise section

because this being said to sweeten you up to stop you bursting into tears or

shouting at them, when they really tell you what‟s wrong with your work, your

project, or your time keeping.

To make feedback useful and developmental you need to be honest and

straightforward not confusing the receiver with mixed messages.

One way to do that is to first offer to give the feedback ...

“I would like to give you some feedback which might help to improve the way

you tackle this project. Would you be happy for me to give you this feedback?”

If they agree you can give your view and suggestions for improvement. If they

say no there is no point in your wasting your breath or time because they are

not going to learn from it anyway. Feedback is only for helping people to

improve their skills or aptitudes if that is not the purpose then don‟t even

bother.


A Useful Guide to




Chris Carling

Chris Carling, author of A Useful Guide to

Overcoming Anxiety and A Useful Guide to

Work Life Balance, is a communication expert,

mediator and ICF Professional Certified Coach,

with over 2500 hours coaching experience.

A former Director of Communications of the

International Coach Federation (UK), Chris has

worked as a coach and/or facilitator with a

wide range of individuals and organisations in

sectors including finance, theatre, pharmaceuticals, local government, education,

construction and architecture.

Before becoming a coach she ran her own consultancy as a management

training specialist and writer/developer of training materials. She is a script-

writer of award winning training films, co-author of two books on communication

and developer of a pack for trainers aimed at nurturing creativity in the

commercial world (Creativity for Competitive Advantage, Fenman).

Chris has an MA and PhD from the Exeter University and an MPhil in Linguistics

from Cambridge University.

Links

www.chriscoach.com

Contact Details


Telephone: 01223 367271






http://www.chriscoach.com/


A Useful Guide to




Question 39

Context

Coaching around stress and feeling out of balance.

Question

With so many demands and so much going on, where should I start in trying to

get back on an even keel?

Chris‟s Answer

Try this exercise which is to do an audit of your life in terms of what you have

'Too much' of, 'Too little', or 'Just enough'. Fill in the chart including tasks,

responsibilities, activities, people, feelings, fears, whatever comes to mind:

Too Much Too Little Just Enough

Now consider your results. Look first at the Just Enough column. Where have

you got it right? Think about how you managed that. Are there strategies you

could use to work on the results of the other two columns?

Now look through the other two lists. Which is longer? This should give you

some idea where you should be looking more at adding in – if your 'Too Little'

list is longer – or at taking away if your 'Too Much' list is the longer one.


A Useful Guide to




Question 40

Context

Coaching in assertiveness or dealing with a difficult boss.

Question

How can I stand up for myself with a very forceful boss?

Chris‟s Answer

In short, by being very clear in yourself what's right for you and being assertive

in negotiating it.

To see this more clearly let's look at two scenarios between boss Anita who

wants team member, Brian, to drop everything and come to a meeting she

deems very important. She bustles up to Brian's desk ...

A: X is coming in this afternoon, Brian. I need you to be there.

B: But I've got a meeting with Y this afternoon.

A: You'll have to put him off. You know how important the X account is.

B: I'm supposed to be working on Y's project.

A: I'm sure you can sort him out. This is urgent. OK?

In this scenario, Anita gets her way leaving Brian with a problem: what to do

about his planned meeting with Y. As a result he feels stressed and annoyed,

and is likely to spend precious time complaining to his colleagues about Anita

and the mess she's landed him in. But did it have to be like that? Consider a

slightly different version ...

A: X is coming in this afternoon, Brian. I need you to be there.

B. OK. What time is he coming in? If you remember, I've got a meeting

with Y.

A: You'll have to put him off.

B: That would hold up their project.

A: You know how important the X account is.

B: I do. But we don't want to upset Y. What time is X coming in?

A: About 2.30.

B: If you can do without me till 3, I'll see if I can get Y to come in earlier.

Maybe suggest lunch. How would that be?

A Useful Guide to




In version one, Anita is acting the 'bossy manager', who thinks she can tell staff

what to do without looking at the consequences.

Brian's response is passive. He makes a couple of mild protests about the

problem Anita has created for him, accepts her demands then complains about

her behind her back. A common enough reaction to a 'bossy' boss. Importantly,

both Anita and Brian are solely concerned with their own issues: neither

acknowledges the other's problem.

In version 2, however, Brian adopts an assertive (and also more self-protective)

response. He doesn't start with a protest, instead he acknowledges Anita's

'request' ('OK') and asks a pertinent question, reminding her of his own

commitments. This way he puts them on a much more equal footing, together

facing a logistical problem.

When Anita tells him to put Y off, he spells out the consequences ('That would

hold up their project.'). He acknowledges the importance of the X account,

showing that he supports Anita, and repeats his question about timing. He then

puts a proposal that can result in a win-win solution.


A Useful Guide to




Question 41

Context

Coaching in time management.

Question

I have so much to do - how can I make more time?

Chris‟s Answer

When we feel overwhelmed with all the demands on our time it's tempting to

believe that if only we have more time somehow we'd do it all. Instead what we

need to focus on is doing less. With clients I work through these tips for making

time for what you feel you don't have time for ...

Prune ruthlessly – Just as plants need to be regularly pruned to flourish,

so too do our over laden lives. Pruning is a radical act: it means cutting

away some of what consumes your time to allow what's left to be more

comfortable and pleasurable. Make a list of all the responsibilities and

activities you could cut away. There will always be some. Remember

pruning is healthy. Less is more.

Dare not to do: Experiment. If you're becoming the family chauffeur,

step back. Bring in others – your partner, other parents. If you're

drowning in email, be ruthless with any that are not centrally important.

Dare to delete rather than keep the others hanging around your Inbox.

Delegate: root out the assumption you may be carrying without realising

that the buck always stops with you. Develop a 'I'll do this if you'll do that'

approach. With everyone.

Question: Everything. Do things have to be the way they are? If

particular tasks/activities/people are sapping your energy or overcrowding

your life, question whether they really need to be there.

Build time out into every day: if you prune ruthlessly enough, this will

be possible. Relearn the art of doing nothing.


A Useful Guide to




Question 42

Context

Coaching in areas such as work life balance, assertiveness and time

management.

Question

When I try to say „No‟ I'm often persuaded to change my mind. How can I say

„No‟ more effectively?

Chris‟s Answer

The following tips can help you say no effectively ...

Start by becoming convinced yourself that the answer is no. If you're

asked to do something – first ask yourself these three questions ...

Can I safely say yes?

Do I need to negotiate some part of this request? (for example, the

timing – 'I can safely say yes for Wednesday so long as we're

finished by 4 pm')

Would it serve me better to say no?

If your conclusion is that no is the right answer, take this as giving

yourself permission to say no.

Don't give a long lead up to saying no or assume it must be obvious you

mean no without your having to say it. Instead:

Say no simply and clearly so you cannot be misunderstood. Useful

phrases include ...

'That doesn't work for me'

'I can't do x, but what I can do is y'

'I'd love to but I can't take anything else on at the moment'

'I'm sorry but it has to be no'

'I'm afraid I can‟t help you this time…'

Do not make excuses ('I would say yes but unfortunately I have to give

Roger a lift that day') or give unnecessary information – the less you say

about why you can't say yes the less ammunition you provide for being

persuaded to change your mind.

A Useful Guide to




Be aware of ways people might work on you to persuade you to

reconsider (e.g. acting surprised even hurt that you have refused; trying

to make you feel guilty by saying they were counting on you; trying to

bully you or challenge you strongly…). Which ones are you most

susceptible to?

If people use any of these (or other) tactics, don't engage – instead be

prepared to repeat your no (repeating one or more of the useful phrases

above). You might add something like: 'I appreciate you have a problem,

but doing x doesn‟t work for me….'

If people try to hand their problem over to you as though if you say no it's

up to you to find someone who'll say yes, don't accept it. Hand the

problem back. Repeat the phrase above: 'I appreciate you have a problem

but I'm afraid I can't help you this time. Who else could help you?'

Keep your tone as neutral as you can. Try not to sound apologetic.

Keep repeating your no until the other person accepts it.

Congratulate yourself on succeeding and use the experience to help you

next time.


A Useful Guide to




Question 43

Context

Coaching on communication skills.

Question

I seem to have more than my share of communication mix-ups. How can I make

sure people understand me?

Chris‟s Answer

If in doubt, and even if not in doubt – confirm. That's the secret of better

communication. And one that's often overlooked. Consider a simple conversation

...

„OK, right. See you next Saturday.‟ „Er…right. You do mean Saturday week?‟ „No,

next Saturday, Saturday coming.‟ „Oh, this Saturday. I thought you meant the

Saturday after.‟ „No, next Saturday, the 21st.‟ „The 21st. Right. Glad we got that

cleared up. See you on 21st.‟

Wasn‟t it lucky that one of them thought to confirm they both had the same

understanding of their arrangements to meet? Language can be a very blunt

instrument such that when it matters, it‟s definitely worth the extra few seconds

required to confirm we both understand the same from a conversation.

Confirming is the communication enhancer we most often forget. It‟s so much

easier to assume that we are being understood as we intend. Yet, when major

cock-ups occur, the blame is regularly laid at the door of „poor communication.‟

Particularly important, therefore, when dealing with staff, suppliers, customers,

is to remember to confirm. You need, for instance, to confirm instructions: „To

make sure we‟re on the same wavelength, go over for me what you‟re going to

do.‟ Confirming doesn‟t mean you repeating the instruction. To be really sure

that you‟ve got your point over, you need the person being instructed to tell you

what they‟ve understood.

You need to confirm the outcome of meetings: „Right, let‟s go over who‟s doing

what. X, what will you be doing?‟

You need to confirm your understanding of a problem that‟s been posed to you:

„Before we go any further, let me clarify what I think you‟ve been saying.‟

A Useful Guide to




Confirming doesn‟t have to take long, but it can avoid misunderstandings and

costly mistakes. So, when in doubt, or even when you‟re not in doubt, just to

make sure, confirm.


A Useful Guide to




Eve Winston

Eve Winston is the Director of Kairi Training and

Development Ltd; a company promoting people

and management development through the

design and delivery of a variety of learning

interventions. Specialist areas include ...

Equality and Diversity.

Career Development.

Interpersonal and communication skills.

Workplace mediation.

Eve began her career in education and training directly after completing her first

degree, BA (Hons) English and History at Leeds University, by teaching English

(TEFL) for the British Council in Finland.

After returning to England, she trained and worked in careers and adult guidance

for a number of years, and then moved into research, policy and management

jobs in education. Through this work she also developed an interest and

expertise in equality and diversity.

Eve became an independent training consultant 14 years ago before setting up

Kairi Training and Development Ltd. She has worked with a wide variety of

organisations in both the public and private sectors, including blue chip

companies, government departments, education establishments, housing

associations and voluntary sector organisations.

In addition to her BA, she also has an MSc in Urban Policy Studies, a Diploma in

Careers Guidance, a Diploma in Training Management and a Certificate in

Workplace Mediation.

When she is not writing or delivering training Eve enjoys exercising, being in the

great outdoors and enjoying life with family and friends.

Links

www.kairi.co.uk

Contact Details


Telephone: 07973 825459

LinkedIn: evewinston Back to Contributing Authors

http://www.kairi.co.uk/





http://www.linkedin.com/pub/eve-winston/11/155/29a

A Useful Guide to




Question 44

Context

1:1 career coaching sessions.

Question

Although I‟m good at my job, I don‟t seem to get the same recognition as other

colleagues who are no better than me, but seem to have a higher professional

profile. Is there anything I can do to get more recognition?

Eve‟s Answer

Yes, there are a number of things you can do.

One of the first things is to observe colleagues who have higher professional

profiles and learn from them. What is it that they say and do? How do they

behave in different situations?

Also take up opportunities to be seen and heard in professional settings, e.g.

meetings, seminars, workshops.

Ask questions, voice your ideas and talk positively about your projects and

achievements to colleagues and more senior staff.

You should also seek out opportunities to be involved in high profile projects

from which you can gain some kudos and recognition.


A Useful Guide to




Question 45

Context

Career development workshops run for public sector employees.

Question

Is it possible to move from a job in the public sector to a job in the private

sector?

Eve‟s Answer

Yes in theory it is, depending on the type of work you do and the job you are

applying for.

However, it is often easier to move in the opposite direction, from the private to

the public sector.

You will need to highlight the transferability of your skills, i.e. skills which you

use in your current job in the public sector, which can be used to carry out the

work in the job you are applying for in the private sector.

You will also need to show an understanding of the values, ethos and operation

of the private /business sector, in particular the company you are applying to

work for, and demonstrate how you can contribute to its business aims.


A Useful Guide to




Question 46

Context

Career development workshops.

Question

I want to get some project management experience, but there are limited job

opportunities in my current job. What can I do?

Eve‟s Answer

You could apply or ask for a temporary secondment opportunity within your

department or organisation, which provides an opportunity to develop your

project management skills. If this is not possible, why not try and create an

opportunity for yourself. You could come up with an idea to address a particular

business need which you could „sell‟ to management. But be aware if they agree

to this and appoint you as the project manager, it could result in a lot of extra

work for you – so be prepared!


A Useful Guide to




Question 47

Context

Career development workshops.

Question

I feel stuck in my job because I can‟t seem to find a suitable job opportunity.

Eve‟s Answer

First of all try to work out exactly what sort of job you want and what type of

organisation you would like to work for.

Make sure you are looking in the right places; publications, websites,

employment agencies.

Some jobs are not even advertised, so, if you are looking for an opportunity, get

out there and do some strategic networking. Let people know that you are

looking for opportunities and what type of opportunities.

Send speculative letters with a copy of your CV to appropriate heads of

department or HR managers to enquire about opportunities.


A Useful Guide to




Question 48

Context

Career development workshops with ambitious participants!

Question

How long should I stay in a job before going for my next promotion opportunity?

Eve‟s Answer

There is no specified period of time so it really depends on the individual and

their circumstances.

High achievers often spend between 1-3 years in a job.

But before making your move, give some thought to your achievements and fit

to the new post as you may often be asked to demonstrate what you have

achieved in your current post, and how the job you are applying for fits in with

your future career plans.


A Useful Guide to




Question 49

Context

Talking to people about diversity and in training sessions.

Question

What does valuing diversity mean?

Eve‟s Answer

Valuing diversity is the way in which individuals, organisations and society in

general respects, acknowledges, includes and embraces all the differences which

exist between us as human beings.

The list of differences is extensive and includes ...

physical

cultural

lifestyle

values and belief

working styles


A Useful Guide to




Question 50

Context

This is often asked by people who question the need for diversity training.

Question

Isn‟t valuing diversity just common sense?

Eve‟s Answer

Certainly we need to apply common sense in order to value diversity, but we

also need sensitivity and understanding to acknowledge and respect the different

experiences and needs of others.

In addition we need to be aware of the legislation relating to equality and

diversity and understand how it is interpreted in the workplace and the delivery

of services.

So, in answer to the question, no it isn‟t just about common sense!


A Useful Guide to




Question 51

Context

This question is often asked by managers and business owners in training

sessions.

Question

It‟s all very well doing the right thing but does diversity offer any business

benefits?

Eve‟s Answer

Research into diversity has shown that there are many business benefits to be

gained by organisations of all sizes and in all sectors.

If your organisation embraces good diversity policies and practices which

promote respect and inclusion, then your staff are more likely to be happier,

more motivated, flexible and productive.

This will help you to attract and keep the best employees for your company.

Similarly, by understanding the different needs of your diverse customers, you

are more likely to provide the goods and services which they want, and this will

help your organisation to survive and prosper.


A Useful Guide to




Question 52

Context

Managers in training sessions, who want to get on with their job as managers,

but don‟t want to cross the line.

Question

What is the difference between being a strong firm manager and being a bully?

Eve‟s Answer

A strong firm manager is someone who manages his/her staff in a respectful and

supportive way.

He/she will set challenging but realistic goals and deadlines, facilitate effective

two way conversation with staff and follow company procedures in a fair and

consistent way.

A bully on the other hand is someone who disrespects their staff and misuses

their power in subtle or aggressive ways to hurt, humiliate or belittle individuals

or groups.


A Useful Guide to




Question 53

Context

Diversity training sessions.

Question

Having a diverse team to manage is very challenging. How do I meet

everyone‟s needs?

Eve‟s Answer

There is no easy answer to this question and it is clearly one of the main

challenges involved in managing diverse teams.

As a manager you have to be fair and consistent in dealing with your staff, whilst

simultaneously recognising people‟s different needs and trying to accommodate

them where possible.

Try to achieve balance in accommodating requests from different team

members, and remember that you can only accommodate requests which are

reasonable and do not disrupt the operation of the business.


A Useful Guide to




Harish Davda

Harish, author of A Useful Guide to Managing Projects,

is the founder of HDA Training and Development Ltd

which provides tailored management training,

consultancy and coaching to clients in the SME,

corporate and not-for-profit sectors.

Harish has over 15 years experience in management

development training and coaching specialising in

Strategy, Project Management, Business Development, Human Resource

Management and Managing Equality and Diversity.

In the past, he has worked as a senior manager in an educational environment

and taught extensively in colleges and a London-based business school.

His interests and passion are in unlocking human potential in the work place

through personal and organisational transformation and integrating business

strategies with HR and other strategies.

Harish holds a BA in Economics and Marketing from University of Lancaster,

Graduate Certificate in Education from University of Leeds and an MBA from

Open University Business School. He is also a certified NLP Practitioner.

When not writing or with clients Harish enjoys cooking exotic dishes, reading,

walking, watching movies and travelling.

Links

Web: www.hda-trainingdevelopment.co.uk

Blog: www.hdatraining.wordpress.com

Twitter: www.twitter.com/hdatraining

Linked in: http://uk.linkedin.com/in/harishdavda

Contact Details


Telephone: +44 (0)1424 221 810

Mob: +44(0)7802 485 608

Skype: harishdavda

Address: Innovation Centre, Highfield Drive, Churchfields, St Leonards on Sea

TN38 9HU Back to Contributing Authors


http://www.hda-trainingdevelopment.co.uk/

http://www.hdatraining.wordpress.com/

http://www.twitter.com/hdatraining

http://uk.linkedin.com/in/harishdavda

A Useful Guide to




Question 54

Context

When delivering Project Management training.

Question

Why has Project Management become important?

Harish‟s Answer

The concepts of Project Management have been around for a long time... for

thousands of years! The Egyptians used these concepts in building pyramids.

Click on the link below to see a fascinating short video ...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C1uxCBx2-UQ&feature=related

Over the last 60 years, Project Management concepts and techniques began to

be used in varying degrees, initially in large organisations and later in SMEs and

not-for-profit organisations.

These are some of the reasons why Project Management has become important

...

Performance in organisations can be measured more effectively by

measuring the outputs and outcomes of projects

Projects focus people in achieving results

Change in organisations can be initiated better by initially doing projects

as „pilots‟. The results are then assessed to decide if the change, often

involving more resources, is worthwhile starting and implementing.

It is generally easier to get funding for projects which can deliver specific

results, particularly for not-for-profit organisations which rely on funding

from the public sector (local authorities or government departments) or

funding organisations such as National Lottery.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C1uxCBx2-UQ&feature=related

A Useful Guide to




Question 55

Context

When coaching a client on basic project management skills.

Question

Why do projects fail? What can I do to avoid projects failing?

Harish‟s Answer

Research has shown that over 50% of projects either fail or they do not meet

the expectations of stakeholders. The main reasons are pretty obvious ...

They are not planned properly in relation to who will do what and by

when?

They are not costed properly; often projects run out of money and are

having to be abandoned or changed drastically.

Sufficient resources, including time, people and money are not allocated

to projects.

The project manager lacks skills in managing (including motivating) the

project team.

Projects are not monitored properly – as a result, time slips, panic sets in

and quality of project outcomes suffer.

The structure or methodology in managing projects is missing. Often,

managers have their own different way of managing projects which does

not lead to common understanding in managing projects within the

organisation.

The following can help you to avoid your project failing ...

Link your project to wider organisational goals and strategy

Plan your project in detail....be clear about what your aims, objectives and

outcomes are

Make sure that sufficient resources are available

Identify stakeholders...those who have a vested interest in the project.

Devise a strategy of managing them, including their expectations. Identify

those stakeholders who can support you in times of difficulty

Devise a risk management plan to manage risks, including clearly defined

contingencies.

A Useful Guide to




Use Gantt charts and/or Critical Path Analysis to keep your project on

track....so that it can be completed on time and on budget

Monitor all the activities in your project, on a regular basis, and take

corrective action if required.

Support and motivate your project team....keep them informed of the

changes, listen to their concerns and help them to solve their difficulties

and praise their efforts.

The video below explains why projects fail.

http://video.techrepublic.com.com/2422-14074_11-252719.html


http://video.techrepublic.com.com/2422-14074_11-252719.html

A Useful Guide to




Question 56

Context

When delivering training on Project Management.

Question

What is dependency in Project Management?

Harish‟s Answer

Dependency simply means that when you are planning a project, you list

activities in the order of importance...there are certain things which you need to

do before you do other things. For example, if you were painting a room, you

would paint the ceiling first before you paint the walls. Guess what! When I

painted a room, long time ago, I painted the walls first, and, I had to paint the

walls again, after I had finished painting the ceiling!

There are likely to be many dependencies in a project. To establish

dependencies, you need to look at each activity and ask, „What comes before

this activity?‟ You keep asking this question until you arrive at the beginning ...

the starting point (the first activity) will not have a dependency.

If you get a dependency wrong, you will have to go back, perhaps quite a few

steps. This would be costly in terms of time and other resources.


A Useful Guide to




Question 57

Context

When discussing a tailored training, with a client, on Project Management.

Question

What are project management tools? Why are they useful?

Harish‟s Answer

There are two widely used Project Management tools: Gantt Chart (GC) and

Critical Path Analysis (CPA). Both these tools show the visual representation of a

project and help us to see visually where a project is at, at any given time. If

delays happen in a project, at any time, we can see what may be going wrong

and thus take corrective actions to get back on track. These two tools also show

us the critical path in a project. The critical path is the best path or a time-line,

based on a certain logic (using Project Management principles) which has been

applied in a project.

GC is usually used for small projects, e.g. a recruitment project. CPA is usually

used in a large project, e.g. a building project or an office move, where usually a

strict time line has to be adhered to complete the project on time. The extra cost

involved in not completing a building project on time can be quite substantial!


A Useful Guide to




Question 58

Context

When advising a client on recruiting a project manager.

Question

What are the main qualities of a project manager?

Harish‟s Answer

There are many qualities which one would like to see in a project manager. The

following 10 qualities are likely to ensure that a project manager is going to

succeed in his/her role ...

1. Able to plan, organise, and set targets for himself/herself and members of

the team

2. Able to see a big picture, not only in seeing the benefits of a given project

to the organisation and the beneficiaries, but also how the project

outcomes fit in with organisational aims and objectives

3. Able to connect with people, including team members, suppliers and other

stakeholders

4. Able to communicate the vision of the project, milestones, timescales and

importance of completing the project on time and budget

5. Able to make a compelling case for adequate resources at the start of the

project and when additional resources are required during its

implementation

6. Recruit, select and train team members so that through teamwork, the

project is delivered on time and budget

7. Able to correct mistakes of suppliers and team members without getting

angry

8. Delegate tasks and activities to team members without overburdening

them and generally solve problems when they occur.

9. Check and correct quality of outcomes throughout the duration of the

project

10.Ability to motivate team members and generally show leadership in

his/her work


A Useful Guide to




Ian Clarke

Ian Clarke, author of A Useful Guide to Effective Change

and A Useful Guide to Managing Teams and co-author of

A Useful Guide to Managing Meetings and A Useful Guide

to Minute Taking, has a BSc Honours in Physics and a

Post Graduate Certificate in Education.

He has experience of teaching, selling pharmaceuticals,

selling and sales management in telecoms and has been

a trainer and organisational development consultant

since 1992.

Ian has managed his own successful organisational development consultancy,

Effectiveness through Awareness Ltd, since 1994 and, with Steve Westall, co-

founded Pansophix in 2004. He is accredited to use ...

Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI)

Emotional Quotient Inventory (EQ-i)

Elements of Awareness (EoA)

Fundamental of Relations Orientation (FIRO-B)

Situational Leadership

Edward de Bono's Six Thinking Hats

Ian has developed his own 360° Feedback Process and online Team Review.

When not writing or with clients Ian spends his time with his 4 children, 3 step

children and 4 grand children. He plays guitar, takes part in amateur dramatics,

and is a very slow triathlete. He and his wife Anne can often be found exploring

Suffolk on their tandem.

Links

www.pansophix.co.uk; www.pansophix.com; www.247freetips.com

Contact Details


Telephone: 0845 260 2820; 07780 702099

LinkedIn: http://uk.linkedin.com/pub/ian-clarke/0/3ba/113








http://www.pansophix.com/

http://www.247freetips.com/


http://uk.linkedin.com/pub/ian-clarke/0/3ba/113

A Useful Guide to




Question 59

Context

During Managing Performance training.

Question

One of my team members performs just well enough to keep himself out of

capability procedures but I constantly have to talk to him about his poor

performance. What‟s the best way of dealing with him?

Ian‟s Answer

I‟m assuming that his health and attendance are OK. If they are not you should

be dealing with his attendance by adhering strictly to the triggers in your

sickness absence policy. I‟ll assume that you‟re doing that.

First - make sure his objectives are clear and consistent with his role. His

objectives should be outcome orientated rather than activity orientated. After all

you are paying him for what he achieves, not for being there and being busy!

Let‟s assume your objective scoring system is ...

1. Totally Unacceptable Performance

2. Just below Acceptable Performance

3. Acceptable Performance

4. Well above Acceptable Performance.

An objective such as, “Attend a training course on being assertive” is a weak

objective. By turning up he achieves the objective! What would he have to do to

get 4?

Second - When you have set his objectives, and before you give them to him,

ask yourself the following questions for each objective ...

Has he got the skills he needs to achieve this objective?

Has he got the knowledge he needs to achieve this objective?

If the answer to both questions is Yes you can give him the objective and expect

him to score 3 or 4. If the answer to either or both questions is No you must put

something in place to turn the answer to Yes before you give him the objective.

It is not fair to give him an objective he is not equipped to achieve and then put

him on your capability procedure when he fails.

A Useful Guide to




Third – when you give him his objectives you must ...

Test his understanding of them so that you know that he knows what is

expected

Explain, for each objective, what he needs to achieve, to score 3 and to

score 4

Explain how you are going to monitor how well he is doing

Explain the consequence of underperforming.

Fourth – set him on his way and provide regular informal and formal feedback

about what he does well and what he does that is below what is expected.

Fifth – do what you said you would do. Monitor in the way you said you would.

If he delivers below what is expected you must deliver the consequence

immediately. Don‟t mess about. Make sure he understands you are not willing to

pay for performance below what is expected.

Sixth – make notes about how you‟ve managed him. Record your observations.

Record what he did well. Record what he didn‟t do well. Record the meetings

you‟ve had.

If you end up with him on your organisation‟s capability procedure at some stage

you, as his manager, will find yourself explaining how you‟ve managed him. If

you can demonstrate that you have managed him appropriately and he still

hasn‟t performed then it will be very difficult for anyone else in your organisation

to support him and extend his employment.


A Useful Guide to




Question 60

Context

During Managing People through Change training.

Question

What‟s the most important thing we must do when we need to make big

changes?

Ian‟s Answer

You must have a story. You must repeatedly tell the story. There are different

types of stories depending on the timescales. This is what the story would look

like when you haven‟t got time for consultation. Fill in the blanks (...) for your

own situation ...

“Some background information.

We are going to change (...). If we don‟t make this change the consequence will

be (...). This is unacceptable because (...).

When we have made the change we can expect( ...). The benefits to …

our customers will be (...)

our staff will be (...)

the organisation will be (...)

the community will be (...)

The timescale for making the change is (...)

As regards how to make the change we considered the following options …

1 (...)

2 (...)

3 (...)

… and decided that the best way to make the change is option (...). The reason

for this is (... ).

The programme for the change is (...).

What we require of you/your team/your department/your division is (...).

While the change is being made we expect (...) to get worse before it gets better

because (...)

A Useful Guide to




We have allowed for this in our targets/Key Performance Indicators and (...).

We expect to see the benefits of the change coming through by (...).

We will keep you informed about the progress by (...).

This change will be successful when (...).”

All your managers should be telling the same consistent story.

Having a comprehensive story doesn‟t eliminate saboteurs but it will certainly

help many of your staff understand why the change is being made and what the

benefits are.


A Useful Guide to




Question 61

Context

During Managing People through Change training.

Question

Who are the most important change agents?

Ian‟s Answer

I believe the most important change agents are your first line managers. They

are probably managing more than 50% of the people in your organisation. In

some organisations they could be managing 70 - 80% of the people in the

organisation.

The first line managers get the brunt of all the complaints, the anger, the

reluctance to change and the lack of acceptance.

They are the ones who have to ensure new skills are learnt, new procedures are

followed, new required behaviours are adhered to, etc.

If you don‟t provide your first line managers with a great story and fantastic

support they‟ll start to collude with their teams and possibly become reluctant

themselves.

Your change initiative is guaranteed to fail if you don‟t recognise that your first

line managers are your key change agents.


A Useful Guide to




Question 62

Context

When discussing team building sessions.

Question

How can I get the team to pull together more effectively?

Ian‟s Answer

There are several different ways to achieve this. For starters have a think about

this ...

Without a clear picture of success, defined success criteria, clear definition of

success (or whatever phrase is appropriate for you) it is very difficult to manage

a team effectively. You have no clear guidelines against which to judge …

The nature, amount and quality of the work the team is doing.

Your customers‟ views of what you are doing.

Your suppliers‟ views of what you are doing.

Team members‟ behaviour.

The culture in the team.

I have worked with a lot of teams. Of all the key indicators I have found that this

is the one that reveals the most about how team members are thinking. Since

1992 I have only met one team in which all team members answered my

question, “How do you know if the team is being successful?” and gave me very

similar answers.

Ask yourself …

“If Ian were to ask me and all my team members, „How do you know if the team

is being successful?‟ would we all give the same answer?”

If you have any doubts then you have some work to do!

One of our associates was working with a senior management team in an

engineering company. This senior management team had existed for many years

and had had the same members for over two years. He told me that team

members said that, before their team away day, they had never explicitly

discussed success.

He added, “The team‟s discussion about „What is success for the team?‟ was the

most powerful part of their away day. Team members found their lack of clarity

A Useful Guide to




about what was success was a major barrier to them being able to work

effectively together”.

Having an agreed definition of success for the team is, in my view, one of the

fundamental key indicators to get right. It gives you, as the team leader, a focus

and a framework against which to judge what‟s going on.

It also gives team members a framework against which they can judge

themselves and each other.

Your picture of success, success criteria, definition of success or whatever you

want to call it should answer three questions …

1. What do we need to deliver? (Targets, revenue, customer satisfaction,

etc)

2. What does the team want? (Recognition, awards, relocation, new systems

etc)

3. What does each team member want? (Bonus, promotion, awards,

training, recognition, responsibilities, leadership opportunities, etc)

Yes, it is possible to have a success definition that only answers the first

question e.g. £150,000 of sales in the first quarter. If you leave it at that, you

are in danger of not paying attention to the team‟s health and the aspirations of

each of the team members. Total focus on the task will eventually lead to

unresolved tensions in the team and frustrated or burnt out team members

which, in turn, makes it harder to achieve task success.

You can run your team like this for short (no longer than 3 months) emergency

projects but please don‟t try and run your team like this as a “way of life”. You

will just make your own job very much harder than it needs to be.

I believe that feelings of success are the biggest energy source in any

organisation. Team members who are feeling successful seem to have much

more energy and enthusiasm than those who are struggling to see what they

have achieved. Teams who are feeling successful are much more likely to

achieve their targets.

If you don‟t have an agreed definition of success you are potentially losing out

on megawatts of team energy! It is very difficult to feel successful if there is

nothing against which to measure your achievements.

A Useful Guide to




It is also important to celebrate success. Celebrating success with your team

members helps them to feel valued and to feel that what they are doing is

worthwhile.

Do you take time out to celebrate your successes? If not how could you? Don‟t

let this potential source of energy go to waste.

How often do you take time out to celebrate what you have achieved rather than

just move on to "What's Next?"

Most of us are motivated and energised by feelings of achievement and yet we

often forget to help our team members recognise what they have achieved and

to help them celebrate their successes.


A Useful Guide to




Question 63

Context

During Introduction to Management training.

Question

How can I get better at running my meetings?

Ian‟s Answer

Before you do anything different you need to know what people think of your

meetings now. If you would like to know how well you chair a meeting click on

this link …

www.pansophix.com/resources/chairperson-feedback-service.html

... and use our free feedback service. This allows the people who attend your

meetings to give you feedback. You can use the feedback to improve how you

run your meetings.

A couple of tips ...

1. Many meetings overrun because of poor time management. When you‟re

in the chair it can sometimes feel difficult to control how much someone is

speaking. If this is a constant problem in your meetings you may need to

introduce a time rule – i.e. limit the amount of time anyone person can

speak for. For example you could say, “OK Ian let‟s hear from you. You

have a maximum of 4 minutes to give us your view.” Obviously, if you

need to do this, you need to be ruthless when the 4 minutes is up.

2. At the end of the meeting ask each action point owner to tell the meeting

what they are going to do and by when. This allows everyone to check

that the action point owners have understood their action points.


http://www.pansophix.com/resources/chairperson-feedback-service.html

A Useful Guide to




Question 64

Context

During a team building event.

Question

I have very different types of people in my team. How do I manage them

effectively when they‟re so different?

Ian‟s Answer

This could be a very long answer but I‟ll try to give the essentials …

You should provide all your team members with what you and they agree

they need so that they can achieve their objectives.

To do a job effectively a person needs 4 things …

Appropriate skills (S)

Appropriate knowledge (K)

A desire to do the job (D)

Self Assurance about doing the job (A)

I remember this as SKAD.

As a manager it is your job to make sure each of your team members has all

four …

If they lack skills train them and give them lots of practice.

If they lack knowledge help them to learn what they need to know and

show them where to find what they need to look up.

If they lack desire talk to them to find out why. Deal with what you find.

Help them to be “up for it”.

If they lack self assurance be supportive and provide evidence of past

successes to help them become more self assured.

Download this Ensuring Objectives are Achieved form to help you.


http://www.pansophix.com/resources/ensuring-objectives-are-achieved.pdf

A Useful Guide to




Janice Lawrence

Janice Lawrence has been working as a freelance

HR Consultant since 2003. She delivers practical

solutions which meet the client‟s specific needs and

support the organisation‟s strategy and culture.

Her areas of specialism include …

Training on HR subjects and management

skills

HR policy and procedure development

Employee communication and consultation.

Before becoming a HR Consultant, Janice was

Group Employee Relations Manager for the InterContinental Hotels Group. In

this role, she was involved in the development of employee relations strategy,

policy and practice. Janice has worked in other large and SME organisations

within a number of sectors, including retail, fmcg and finance and in the public

and voluntary sectors.

Janice also works as an associate trainer.

Janice has a MSC in Administrative Sciences (majoring in Personnel

Management), is a Chartered Fellow of the Chartered Institute of Personnel

Management and a Member of the Chartered Management Institute

When not working, Janice spends her time walking, reading, listening to music,

gardening and cooking.

Contact Details


Telephone: 07793823904

LinkedIn: janicelawrence



http://uk.linkedin.com/pub/lawrence-janice/4/a9a/575

A Useful Guide to




Question 65

Context

When faced with dealing with an alleged misconduct issue.

Question

Why should I spend time and effort to manage conduct? I have lots of other

work demands to deal with and it could damage my working relationship with

my employee.

Janice‟s Answer

You can benefit from a number of advantages by managing the conduct of your

employees. If the conduct of any of your employees does not meet the required

standards, then by dealing with the issue you can ...

1. help the employee understand that their conduct is unacceptable and why,

and the consequences, for them and others, of not changing their

behaviour. This will help him/her improve his/her conduct and as a result

his/her job performance will improve too. This in turn will have a positive

impact on your department‟s performance, which will enhance your

reputation as an effective manager.

2. improve your working relationships with your team members, as they will

see that you are trying to deal with everyone fairly rather than allowing

any member to behave in an unacceptable way. Seeing that you are

willing to tackle such issues is likely to increase their respect for you as a

manager.

3. prevent the conduct problem becoming a more serious issue, which will

then be more difficult to deal with and potentially have more unpleasant

outcomes for all concerned.

Also, remember, as a manager, you have a responsibility to manage the conduct

of your staff and your organisation will expect you to do so.


A Useful Guide to




Question 66

Context

When dealing informally with an alleged misconduct issue.

Question

Why should I keep records about how I manage conduct issues if I am dealing

with them in an informal way?

Janice‟s Answer

Your records can be brief, capturing the main points of any discussion and

actions agreed. They are valuable as...

You will have a record of the key points discussed and agreed with your

employee. This will give you a useful reference for checking whether your

employee‟s conduct is improving/has improved and to answer any queries

about what was agreed.

If your employee submits a claim of unfair treatment or discrimination to

an employment tribunal, your records will support your case by providing

evidence of what you did when trying to deal informally with the issue.

If you or the employee moves to another job within the organisation, then

you can pass the notes on to the employee‟s new manager. He/she will

then be aware of what has happened previously and will be better able to

manage the matter going forward.


A Useful Guide to




Question 67

Context

When the employee raises a grievance during the conduct procedure.

Question

What should I do if the employee raises a grievance while he/she is being taken

through the formal conduct procedure?

Janice‟s Answer

If the employee raises a grievance that relates directly to the matter being

considered under the conduct procedure, e.g. perhaps he/she may claim that

some of the evidence being relied upon is irrelevant, you can deal with the

grievance at the same time as the conduct issue.

If the employee raises a grievance that calls into question the way the conduct

procedure is being managed, e.g. the employee claims that he/she is being

discriminated against, then it is advisable to put the conduct procedure on hold,

deal with the grievance and then resume the conduct procedure.


A Useful Guide to




Question 68

Context

When deciding on the outcome from a conduct meeting.

Question

How can I decide on an appropriate outcome from a conduct meeting?

Janice‟s Answer

First, you need to decide whether the alleged misconduct has been

proven. You can do this by balancing the evidence for and against this

being the case. As you are not considering a criminal case, you do not

have to use the test of „beyond all reasonable doubt‟.

If there is sufficient evidence that misconduct has occurred, then you

need to decide on what action to take. It is important that you act fairly

and consistently. So, when deciding on the nature and severity of any

disciplinary action, you should give consideration to matters such as …

What will help improve the employee‟s conduct?

What is the employee‟s current disciplinary record? Are there any

existing disciplinary warnings?

What is the employee‟s past general work record?

Was the employee aware of the conduct standard required?

What sanctions have been applied in similar situations in the past?

Are there any mitigating circumstances that had an affect on the

way the employee behaved?


A Useful Guide to




Question 69

Context

When there has been alleged gross misconduct.

Question

Why shouldn‟t I automatically dismiss an employee for gross misconduct?

Janice‟s Answer

If an employee who has been dismissed for misconduct submits a claim of unfair

treatment to an employment tribunal, the tribunal will, when coming to its

decision, take into account whether the employer followed the ACAS (Advisory,

Conciliation and Arbitration Service) Code of Practice on Disciplinary and

Grievance procedures. This Code of Practice requires that, however serious an

employee‟s alleged misconduct, a proper investigation should be conducted to

establish the facts and the employee given a chance to explain his/her behaviour

before any decision on dismissal is made. Taking these actions is important also

in the interests of fairness, as otherwise you might be making your decision

based on incomplete evidence.


A Useful Guide to




Michael Beale

“I help you achieve outstanding results through generative changes in

how you think, communicate and behave.”

Michael Beale is one of the UK's foremost NLP

practitioners and trainers. He has over 20 years of

business experience, working with companies like BT,

3M and B&Q. For the past 10 years, he has specialised

in helping individuals, businesses and organisations to

grow and develop through the application of Neuro-

Linguistic Programming (NLP).

Michael is a 'First Institute' SNLP-licensed NLP expert, receiving his training

directly from Bandler and Grinder. Michael does not see himself as a trainer as

such, but rather a facilitator and coach, assisting others to get results for

themselves, proving the value of their training by the success they achieve.

Michael is the founder of PPI Business NLP, a company dedicated to unlocking

people's potential. The goal of PPI Business NLP is to serve as a pragmatic NLP

resource for achieving business excellence. For Michael, NLP has two core

applications - as a personal development tool and as a modelling tool, helping

businesses to replicate excellence.

Michael Beale's philosophy is simple - if we can develop an empowering view of

where we want to go and if we can fully understand and appreciate where we

are now, the steps from one to the other are likely to be successful and highly

enjoyable. An honest appraisal of our current situation allows us to generate a

powerful point of departure and propel us towards our goals.

Michael offers Open and In-House NLP and Business Courses and training, and

Individual and Business Coaching delivered face to face or by telephone and

Skype.

He has worked with many high profile clients including: Abbey, ACCA, Accenture,

Argos, Astra Zeneca, Bank of Scotland, Barclays, BAe, British Sugar, BP, BT,

Burlington, Centrica, HBOS, Oracle, Zurich Insurance, the PM's strategy unit, the

A Useful Guide to




managements of local Government, Central Government, Health, Police and The

Ambulance Service and leading consultancy and training companies across the

UK and Europe.

Michael has a BSc (Hons) (Bradford) in Chemistry and an Advanced Diploma in

World Class Marketing (Leeds Metropolitan University).

Links

NLP Training

NLP Course Dates

NLP DVD, CDs and Downloads

NLP On-Line Conference

Michael's On-Line Diary - Book a Call

Contact Details


Telephone: +44 (0) 1908 506563

Address:

PPI Business NLP Ltd

PPI House,

120 Porthcawl Green

Tattenhoe

Milton Keynes

MK4 3AL

LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/beale


http://www.ppimk.com/NLP-training.html

http://www.ppimk.com/NLP/Training/Courses/registration.htm

http://www.nlp-cds.co.uk/

http://www.nlplc.com/

https://my.timedriver.com/RF3X2


http://www.linkedin.com/in/beale

A Useful Guide to




Question 70

Question

What is Neuro-Linguistic Programing (NLP)?

Michael‟s Answer

NLP is a field of study started by Richard Bandler and John Grinder about 35

years ago when they „modelled‟ patterns that made a number of individuals

exceptionally effective at helping others achieve their objectives.

People who study NLP are particularly interested in the impact of „attitude‟ on

results in various contexts, what internal and external strategies get good

results and how these can be transferred to others through the use of NLP

techniques.

The driving force of NLP is a curiosity to continually explore and code what

works, and then test it in „real life‟ situations.

While many of the original patterns can now be found in top level management

training, they are often „watered down‟ versions of the original training.

Many NLP approaches have been significantly refined and developed over the

past 35 years.


A Useful Guide to




Question 71

Context

Training and coaching.

Question

What are the benefits of NLP training?

Michael‟s Answer

The benefits will depend on who you are and what you want to achieve. Many of

our participants use their training to ...

1. Improve their relationships with stakeholders

2. Improve their relationships with their bosses

3. Develop plans to generate new revenue streams

4. Improve their performance in their current role

5. Work on some real or imagined „blocks‟ that might be holding them back.

At the end of a training session participants will have ...

1. Amplified their communication skills through acquiring and refining a

comprehensive set of tools for their communications and change toolkit

2. Worked through 3 or 4 key challenges of their choosing. This will give

them personal proof that these approaches work.

3. Had a chance to reflect on important areas of their lives in a confidential

and safe environment with expert help on hand, if needed.


A Useful Guide to




Question 72

Context


Question

How do I get the most out of an NLP Training?

Michael‟s Answer

1. Treat your training as an adventure, choose three or four areas to explore

that will make a positive difference to your life if, and when, you move

forward on them

2. Speak to your trainer before your training and bounce what you want to

achieve off him or her. Only proceed with your training if your trainer is

someone whom you intuitively know will encourage you to learn.

3. Be reasonably open and honest. When something works for you say so,

when it doesn‟t, say so. Notice what works for others.

4. Trust the process. Don‟t make assumptions until you‟ve experienced the

results of any intervention.

5. Come prepared to really enjoy the experience.


A Useful Guide to




Question 73

Context


Question

How do I continue to develop my skill level after an NLP course?

Michael‟s Answer

1. The best NLP courses are designed so that, if you actively take part, you

cannot „not learn‟. Most participants are delighted that they find

themselves carrying out appropriate new behaviours at exactly the right

time for their future success.

2. NLP courses „fine tune‟ participants watching and listening skills so they

start noticing what others do to get successful results. Start actively

noticing what others do to get results.

3. Create a plan to ask for feedback from key stakeholders and use this as a

starting point for further development.

4. Review your „inner network‟ and ensure you interact with enough high

calibre people in the contexts that interest you.


A Useful Guide to




Question 74

Context


Question

Is hypnosis relevant for business and professional people?

Michael‟s Answer

Hypnosis is an exploration of communication that has a direct and noticeable

impact on others.

All successful communicators, whether as sales people, negotiators, politicians,

parents and influential children, use hypnotic techniques whether they have

been taught them or picked them up naturally.

If communication and influence is important to you, then find out about the

benefits for yourself. Your competitors are probably already doing so!

There are a number of additional benefits of studying hypnosis. You will become

more comfortable with yourself, have the ability to shrug of unnecessary stress

and find life more fun.


A Useful Guide to




Stephen Harris

Stephen Harris, author of A Useful Guide to Sales I, has over 30 years of B2B

and B2C sales experience around the world. In particular Stephen has extensive

experience of driving successful outcomes in both tele-sales as well as face to

face account management situations.

Having initially cut his sales teeth in IT corporate sales, Stephen‟s rapid

promotion led him to successfully managing several large field based salesforces

and contact centres. For the last 15 years Stephen has been a serial

entrepreneur establishing several successful businesses including a sales training

consultancy, and is demand around the world on the speaker circuit. Stephen

provides sales advice and delivers sales training to a wide range of customers

from global corporates through to 1:1 training and coaching of individuals.

Stephen lives with his wife and four children and family dog in Kent, and when

not working likes to relax walking over the Downs.

Links

www.stephenharrisbooks.co.uk

Contact Details




http://www.stephenharrisbooks.co.uk/


A Useful Guide to




Question 75

Context

Both in sales training and live selling

Question

What would you say is the single most important sales technique to achieve

success?

Stephen‟s Answer

The simple answer to this question is this: firstly stop „telling‟ or „feature

bashing‟ (about your product or service) and start asking questions in an

effective way and actively listening to the answers. This is the most important

technique that you have to master to become world class at selling. I cannot

stress enough the importance of asking questions in the correct way and actively

listening to become fluent at selling.

Many overconfident sales people claim to know all about questioning yet still

have so much to learn. They may know about the different types of questions,

but the key to this technique, is the way of using them in combination to achieve

outstanding results, through controlling a conversation and maintaining a high

profile in front of the prospect.

For example most sales professionals know about open questions (information

gathering) and closed questions (that have a yes or no answer). What they

won‟t know is one of my „questioning‟ golden rules.

The Golden Rule is: Never use a closed ended question unless you know the

answer, otherwise you will start to become defensive. When you become

defensive you start to lose control of the conversation and your profile becomes

negative.

However when used in combination with open ended questions they can become

a powerful combined force which is the secret to becoming fluent at sales.

Question: Would you like to know more?

Forgive my pun here is a great example of using a closed ended question, which

I know your answer to, otherwise you wouldn‟t be reading this answer!

However, what I wanted to do in the example above is to let you see how

powerful it is to set the scene with an opportunity then ask someone if they

would like to know more, rather than, “and let me tell you another thing about

my great questions!”

A Useful Guide to




So, you now understand when I say, never tell when you sell; only ask why they

have not bought from you/agreed to have a meeting with you. It is so much

more powerful and the great thing is that you have positioned the conversation

very quickly and very carefully so the prospect is asking for more information.

A useful analogy for you to think about is as follows: in the same way a world

class snooker player would control the cue ball, to line it up ready for the next

few shots, you can start to control the conversation using these closed ended

questions with great effect to line up your next great question. This could be

another closed ended type question to help get you get into an even better

position to deliver the open question that you really want to ask. In doing so you

have dramatically accelerated the process of building a relationship and gaining

commitment which is a must do, when on a sales call.

Let me give you another example ...

[To be delivered with a relatively slow thoughtful style pace]

“John, [Pause] can I ask you a really difficult question?”

This is a closed ended question that I know the answer to.

“In fact do I have your permission to ask a really difficult question?”

Again, a closed ended question that I know the answer to?”

“Ok go ahead.”

“I am confused, John, why we are not doing business, why do you think that is?”

A great open ended question which I wanted to ask, but it was going to be too

blunt a question to ask on its own so I set it up nicely with two closed ended

questions. Just as the snooker or pool player would set the cue ball up exactly

where they wanted it ready for the next shot.


A Useful Guide to




Question 76

Context

Both sales training and live selling.

Question

Why do you say successful selling is not about explaining your products or

services?

Stephen‟s Answer

So if successful selling is not about explaining your products or services then

what is it about? I love this question as the answer goes to the heart of what

you should be doing as a successful salesperson.

The same question put another way is, “what is the definition of sales?” In fact

this is a question I always ask my training delegates at the start of a face to face

training session. It is an incredibly powerful question.

The reason why it is a powerful question always becomes self evident when I get

each delegate to give me their answer.

I invariably get numerous answers such as, “matching product or services to

customers needs”, or “persuading or convincing someone of the advantages of

your product or service”.

In fact it is fair to say that I get as many different versions of this definition as I

have delegates – in other words everyone has a different view of the definition

of sales!

(Also as a subject to stimulate discussion next time you meet your sales

colleagues ask them this question and see the difference for yourself. I am sure

you will be amazed at the variations you receive in responses.)

The point here is, “how are you going to ever excel at sales if you don‟t

have a clear, simple and concise definition of what good looks like?”

How are you going to aspire to being world class at sales if we don‟t have a clear

definition? Just about everyone I train is fundamentally flawed to become the

best sales person they can be because they lack this clarity.

So the most powerful definition of sales consists of only two activities. If you are

not doing one activity then you must be doing the other.

The most powerful definition of sales is ...

A Useful Guide to




“Sales is all about Building Relationships and Gaining Commitment.”

- Stephen Harris

This definition is so powerful in that it helps you focus on what you should being

doing question by question, hour by hour, day by day, week by week. If you are

not building relationships then you should be gaining commitment, and vice a

versa if you are not gaining commitments then you should be building

relationships.

The notion that relationships are critical to selling is widely held, but on their

own is not enough. More than eighty years ago Dale Carnegie wrote his famous

book, How to Win Friends and Influence People. The second half of this title is

worth considerable attention. The best sales people influence others… they don‟t

just make friends.

The best salespeople ask prospects for commitments in a way that gets results.

They are not afraid to risk the relationship to ask for the business. I show you

how do this in a non-confrontational way in A Useful Guide to Sales I.



A Useful Guide to




Question 77

Context


Question

How do I handle resistance and objections?

Stephen‟s Answer

Handling objections is probably the one area that causes the most concern for

sales people, however much of this concern is unfounded.

Let us be clear prospects can not object to something until we have actually

presented our offering, so up to that point think of it as merely resistance.

In a sales telephone call you will be doing very little “push” or “tell” (i.e. feature

bashing) selling so that you will mainly meet resistance rather than full

objections.

The good news is that although there may initially feel like there is an endless

list of different and difficult resistance type questions or statements or objections

that a salesperson has to face, in reality there are only a handful of scenarios

that you need to learn how to handle in a confident and fluent manner.

When resistance is thrown at you it is your attitude that will help you to

overcome it! This cannot be stressed enough your attitude is central to how well

you handle resistance and objections. If a salesperson lacks self-belief on how to

handle resistance they will capitulate at the first hurdle. What they need to do is

arm themselves with these tools and techniques on how to handle resistance

and objections. Then with practice they will quickly become fluent and build a

stronger attitude based on a self-belief that they can handle anything that is

thrown at them.

In fact there is nothing that someone can say that cannot be controlled in a

professional way – if you know how to do it.

It is relatively easy to quickly reach a level of fluency and strength of attitude

where you even welcome the opportunity to handle some resistance!

Answer questions you want to answer and learn how to deflect the ones you

don‟t. One way of doing this is by answering a question with a question.

A Useful Guide to




In my Useful Guide, A Useful Guide to Sales I, I show you several methods of

how to build your own replies to a prospect‟s resistance and objections to build

that self-belief and strength of attitude.

Below I have taken an extract of some of the prepared replies from my

Useful Guide of examples of how to handle objections and different

types of resistance you may encounter on a cold call.

"Not interested"

..... I am sure you have a good reason for saying that, may I ask you what it is?

"Aren‟t you expensive?"

.... I will go into price at our meeting. However what I can say is we improve

efficiency and reduce costs.

May I ask you the price of not investigating new ideas in this area and what

could that potentially cost your business in the future?

"I'm too busy"

... I'm not going to waste your time, merely ask you to have a look at what we

are involved in. I would like to bounce some ideas off you and I would value

your opinion on what we do.

"Call back in six months"

I could do however you will miss an opportunity.

"More pressing issues"

.... May I ask you how pressing reducing costs and improving profit is?

"Happy with current supplier"

.... I'm not asking you to change, merely have a look at what we are involved in;

I'd value your opinion.

"Is this a cold call?"

....The reason for my call is to introduce my organisation and myself.

"How long will our meeting take?"

.... That really depends on how many questions you have for me. However I can

guarantee I won‟t waste one minute of your time.

"Does he know who you are?"


A Useful Guide to




... Our business has had various forms of communication, if you could let him

know I'm on the line. Thank you.

"Why should I see you?"

.... Great question. Perhaps I could reverse it and ask you. What possible

reservations would you have to seeing me?


A Useful Guide to




Question 78

Context


Question

How do I overcome the fear of picking up the phone and making that sales call?

Stephen‟s Answer

In a Harvard Business Review article some time ago where the authors

interviewed some 10,000 sales people, the number one concern that salesperson

had was the fear of making a sales call.

When it comes to making sales calls why do people procrastinate? Why do they

put them off? There is always an email to write or a phone call to take or even

just another coffee to make.

If you peel away all the excuses, all the so called justifications, it always comes

down to the same answer.

The answer is the same every time, the fear of rejection!

When I spot this occurring with one of my salespeople or training delegates I

have the following conversation with them about one of the most important

fundamentals. This helps them to understand what is really happening to them

and how they can easily overcome it.

Remember:

“The only sales tool you need to succeed is yourself”

- Stephen Harris

So the first step in overcoming our fear of cold calling is to recognize that our

fear is self-imposed. It's stemming from us. It's our perception and attitude

about cold calling that paralyzes us. Of course that means that we are also the

only ones that can break the shackles that we've put on ourselves.

There are two main qualities of fear. First, fear is imaginary. In other words, our

fears are our thoughts; they are in our head. Second, our fear of cold calling is

always in the future. We are afraid of something that has not happened yet.

While everyone may have fear to some extent, when we let it imprison or limit

us, we have given it too much importance. Keep in mind that FEAR is "False

Emotions Appearing Real."

A Useful Guide to




There is a two part solution to addressing Rejection and below I explain part

one of the solution. You will find part 2 of the solution in my Useful Guide – A

Useful Guide to Sales I.

Part 1 – How to Handle Rejection

By asking a series of questions, about their behaviour, I get the sales person to

recognise that they are procrastinating and not being effective as they could be.

I get them to admit to themselves that at times they don‟t make that call

because they fear the reaction they might get from a senior executive, or might

have to face some form of rejection.

In doing so I move the person from denial/unawareness (I don‟t have a

problem) to awareness (I might have a problem) to acceptance (I do have a

problem).

Then I ask them if they want to overcome this fear and dramatically improve

their performance. (A closed question to which I know the answer, which is

“Yes!”)

So I summarise the conversation so far ...

You fear that you may get some adverse reaction.

You fear that you may get some form of rejection.

You fear that you may not win any business.

Then I ask a series of questions ...

Do you have relationship with this prospect? Answer, “No”.

Do we as a company have a relationship with this prospect? Answer, “No”.

So the answer is simple- we have nothing to lose by ringing this account.

In other words, “you cannot lose what you don‟t have!”

We do not have a relationship and we do not do any business with this prospect

so what have you got to lose by picking up the phone and ringing them? Answer,

Nothing!

In fact you cannot lose – because you view each call as a practice call. After

each call you take a short moment to reflect on the call.

Irrespective of the outcome of the call, ask yourself what worked well? What

didn‟t work well?



A Useful Guide to




Only by reflecting and re-enforcing with yourself what worked well and

storing this in your armoury of communication skills will you continue to

develop and become more fluent in communications skills.

More importantly you must also work out where you went wrong in calls that did

not have a successful outcome. Ask yourself, “at what point did I start to lose

credibility or what objection was it that I could not handle well?”

Then work out a solution to that situation and again store it in your armoury

ready for the next call.

So you cannot lose every time you make a call.

Either you reach your desired outcome for the call (e.g. close a sale or agree to

have a business meeting), or you do not achieve the desired outcome for the call

but you learnt something new about how to open with more credibility, how to

handle a new type of resistance.


A Useful Guide to




Question 79

Context


Question

As a salesperson why should I stop selling?

Stephen‟s Answer

Stop trying to make the sale instead seek the truth.

If you are focused on making the sale – which is what you are traditionally told

to do – you are effectively focusing on yourself and on what you want. This can

lead to desperation and this can be felt and sensed by the prospect. If you are

focussed on what you want then you cannot be focussed on the prospect. If you

are not focussed on the prospect you cannot get to the truth of what the

prospect is thinking. Only then can you establish if there is a deal to be done.

For those of you who have had considerable sales experience I am sure you can

testify to the number one challenge in sales is dealing with prospects who have

indicated an interest in your offering but then disappeared into the ether! They

refuse to take your call and do not reply to your email. That is why it is so

important to get to the truth of the situation.

Behaviour change required ...

Change from push to pull selling

How do we do this? If we say there are four generic steps to the sales process ...

1. Ask Questions

2. Confirms Client‟s needs

3. Match Client‟s needs to our offering

4. Close the sale.

Push selling is where a seller jumps straight to step 3. We do all the talking,

telling the prospect, albeit most enthusiastically, all about the offering. Although

the seller is essentially fumbling around in the dark as they have not established

the prospect‟s needs. So they try to download as much information to the

prospect as possible as quickly as possible, and then they finish, they then hold

their bated breath, hoping for a miracle and that the prospect will say, “Yes!” I

am sure you have all experienced a sales call like this at sometime in the past.

A Useful Guide to




This type of sales invariably does not work, because the seller has not started by

asking questions and establishing the prospect‟s needs and then and only then

start matching the prospect‟s needs to your offering.

What you must do is to start at step 1 and methodically work your way through

to step 4. This is “Pull” selling where you pull the prospect towards yourself by

asking questions and getting to the truth of what they are thinking. Thereby

identifying and confirming their real needs, matching them to the relevant

features and benefits of your offering and in doing so close the sale.

This process of only asking questions and not “telling” a client about yourself or

about your offering when you are selling goes to the very heart of successful

sales.

If fact in some sales situations you ONLY need to ask questions to achieve the

desired outcome. Questions and active listening are so powerful. Not only can

you control a conversation, you can use them to place thoughts and words in

your client‟s mind, and then, by using further questions, get them to say these

words back to you. What is even more amazing is that, they will think these are

their own words and firmly believe in what they are saying.

What I‟m suggesting here is that if the client does not buy how you sell, they are

not going to buy what you sell. We have been so wired to focus on our service

and our product as a solution we cannot often let go, we tell people about it we

love it so much. Unfortunately, that is us and our needs to express ourselves

and our service. The shift required here is to let your product/service sit by the

side for a few minutes and strictly focus on problems that people might have,

get to the truth of the situation and then both of you two together can decide if

you can help them or not.


A Useful Guide to




Steve Amos

Steve Amos, author of A Useful Guide to Interviewing

and co-author of A Useful Guide to Dealing with Difficult

Behaviour, is a freelance writer and training consultant.

He has worked with a wide range of clients, and is

particularly experienced in working with government

departments and local authorities. His specialist

subjects include interviewing skills, performance

management and communication skills.

Steve is committed to delivering high quality learning

and development solutions which respond to customer

needs and achieve agreed objectives. He is a clear, succinct communicator with

excellent listening and questioning skills.

In January 2006 Steve was awarded an MSc in Training and Performance

Management by the University of Leicester. His dissertation was on the

application of competency frameworks in the government sector.

When not working with clients or writing Steve spends time playing with his

children, listening to live music and walking by the sea.

Links

www.satc.org.uk

Contact Details


Telephone: 01424 442861






http://www.satc.org.uk/


A Useful Guide to




Question 80

Context

Communication or interviewing skills training.

Question

How do I interrupt someone who is rambling off the point and get them back on

track?

Steve‟s Answer

Sometimes we allow people to talk generally or hypothetically at some length

because we feel unable to interrupt them. Many of us are brought up believing

that it is rude to interrupt, or lack the self-confidence to do so. However, the

result of this in an interview is that the precious and limited time available for

generating evidence ends up being frittered away on generalities.

This is not in anyone‟s best interests – the interviewer or the interviewee.

You therefore have a responsibility to interrupt and re-focus the discussion. This

can be difficult to do, particularly if someone is in full flow and it seems hard to

get a word in edgeways. For this reason interviewers need to practice and

develop the skill of assertive interruption.

To assertively interrupt you first need to adopt the appropriate body language.

Lean forward and raise your hand – like a police officer stopping traffic. As you

do this say ...

“Let me stop you there ...”

Usually an interviewee will respond to this and stop talking. If they fail to

respond raise your hand again and say ...

“I need you to stop for a moment ...”

Once the interviewee has stopped talking and given you their attention then re-

direct them to the avenue you wish them to go down – again like a police officer

directing traffic! If possible do this by recognising and building upon something

they have said which was of value, e.g. ...

“Let me stop you there... I was interested when you mentioned that the

argument was overheard by the customers who were waiting in reception.

What did you do about that aspect of it?”

A Useful Guide to




If it is not possible to do this you may need simply to provide the interviewee

with very clear clarification of what you are looking for, e.g. ...

“You‟ve been talking about an argument between two of your colleagues,

but I‟m interested in your Customer Relations skills. Tell me about a

situation which directly involved you dealing with a customer.”

Sometimes an interviewee may go off track because your line of questioning was

not sufficiently clear to begin with. If this is the case then be honest about it ...

“I‟m sorry – perhaps my question wasn‟t sufficiently clear. What I‟m

interested in is how you dealt with a situation directly involving your

customers, not one involving your colleagues.”

Whichever of these approaches you use, it is essential that you develop the

ability to politely but firmly interrupt – and if you are not getting the information

you need it is in the interviewee‟s best interests for you to do so.


A Useful Guide to




Question 81

Context

Time management training.

Question

I feel overwhelmed with work – what will help me to prioritise?

Steve‟s Answer

In „The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People‟ Stephen R Covey distinguishes

between urgent and important work. He devised the „Urgent/Important Grid‟,

which separates work into 4 categories ...

Quadrant 1 – Urgent and Important. Crises or emergencies come into

this category – there will be serious consequences if they are not dealt

with straight away.

Quadrant 2 – Important but Not Urgent. This quadrant contains the

activities which are essential to achieving our long term goals, such as

personal development, planning and relationship building. But too often

we set these important long term activities aside in favour of work which

is more pressing and urgent.

Quadrant 3 – Urgent and Not Important. These are things which seem

urgent – a ringing phone, the „ping‟ of an incoming e-mail – but when we

investigate we find they are usually unimportant. The problem is that by

constantly checking we keep getting diverted from more important work.

Quadrant 4 – These tasks do not contribute to achieving either our long

term or short term goals, but we allow them to distract and divert us –

wasting time that could have been spent more productively.

Continued on the next page ...

A Useful Guide to




1. Urgent and Important 2. Important and Not Urgent

Crises

Pressing Problems

Deadline Driven projects

Prevention

Relationship building

Researching new opportunities

Planning

Personal development

Recreation

Some meetings

Some phone calls

3. Urgent and Not Important 4. Not Important and Not Urgent

Some interruptions

Some meetings

Some phone calls

Some mail/email etc

Trivia

Displacement activities/Procrastination

Chatting

Some mail/email

Some phone calls

Surfing the internet

If we do not plan our time effectively all of the other quadrants expand and eat

into the time available for the important activities in quadrant 2 – the ones that

are essential to our long-term effectiveness.

It is therefore important that we control the time spent on activities in quadrants

1, 3 & 4, in order to maximise the time we have available for quadrant 2.

A couple of useful exercises ...

1. Keep a time log for a couple of days, then transfer the tasks recorded on

to a blank urgent/important grid to see how much time you spend in each

quadrant.

2. Transfer your to-do list on to a blank urgent/important grid. You can then

book out time in your diary to dedicate to quadrant 2 activities.


A Useful Guide to




Question 82

Context

Interviewing skills training.

Question

How do I keep both my own questions and the interviewee‟s answers on track?

Steve‟s Answer

The way that an interviewer can keep both their questioning and the candidate‟s

answers closely focused on the relevant criteria, is by following the four steps of

the Interviewing Skills Flow Chart.

Following these four steps is the key to your success as an interviewer – so let‟s

look at each of them in more detail.

Step 1 – Ask an open-ended question which is directly relevant to the

criteria

One of the attributes we‟re looking for is the ability to resolve problems

for a customer when things go wrong. Tell me about a time when you‟ve

done that.

You state on your application form that you managed a poor performer

whom you brought up to the required standard. Describe how you went

about doing that.

The Interviewing Skills Flow Chart

1. Opening Question – aimed straight

at the criteria

2. Get the candidate talking about a

specific example

3. Ask relevant open questions –

What, Why, How, Who, When,

Where?

4. Listen!

A Useful Guide to




You mention on your application form that you maintained performance in

priority areas when your team was under pressure. Explain to me how

you did that.

These questions point the candidate in the right direction, by being clear and

specific about the type of examples you are looking for.

Step 2 – Ensure that they answer with a relevant, specific example

Asking for a relevant, specific example does not necessarily mean you will get

one! People often find it easier to generalise – it is what we tend to do in day to

day speech. You may also find candidates who are confident in their ability to

sound impressive when generalising, but fear being exposed if they have to talk

in depth about a specific example from their experience.

The following phrases are sure signs that a candidate is NOT providing you with

a specific example ...

What I always say is ...

What I would do is ...

The way we deal with that is to ...

Notice that these phrases use either the present tense („What I always say is...‟)

or the future tense („What I would do is...‟). If a candidate talks in the present

tense they are generalising, if they talk in the future tense their answers will be

hypothetical. A candidate needs to talk in the past tense if they are to provide

you with the specific, detailed evidence you need.

You should also listen carefully for use of the word „we‟ instead of „I‟. Given that

many tasks involve working as part of a team it is sometimes genuinely difficult

for a candidate to isolate their part in what was done. However, you are not

interviewing them as a representative of their team – you are interviewing them

as an individual candidate. You therefore need to get the candidate to be specific

about their personal contribution to any team activity.

Step 3 – Once they are talking about a relevant, specific example – ask

them questions about it!

As we have already seen it can be hard work focusing a candidate in order to

generate the kind of detailed evidence you are looking for – so once you‟ve got

them talking about a relevant example make sure that you milk it for all the

evidence you can!

A Useful Guide to




A good example will be dripping with evidence like a wet sponge, and your job

as an interviewer is to wring out that soggy sponge so by the end of the

interview you have a bucket full of evidence. In order to do this remember

Kipling‟s Six Honest Serving Men...

“I keep six honest serving men

(They taught me all I knew);

Their names are What and Why and When

And How and Where and Who”

Step 4 – Listen!

This may sound obvious, but actually doing it may be harder than you think.

What should happen in an interview is that you ask a question, then listen

intently to the candidate‟s answer. But what often happens is that once you have

asked a question, you immediately start thinking about what you will ask next.

This means that when the candidate stops talking you haven‟t got a clue as to

what they have just told you, and your next question may not make sense to the

candidate at all. Even worse, you may ask them something they have just told

you.

There are three steps involved in listening to and making sense of the

candidate‟s answers ...

1. Listen carefully to what the candidate says. This involves focusing and

giving them your full attention – not allowing yourself to be distracted

by anything else that‟s going on – including what you might ask next.

2. Make sense of what they have said. If they have given a lengthy answer

a useful technique is to paraphrase it – state the key points back to

them. E.g.

“So you heard shouting, went out to the office and two team members

were squaring up to each other.”

Paraphrasing has benefits for everyone involved in the interview ...

It enables you to make sense of what the candidate has said to you

It demonstrates to the interviewee that you have understood – or

gives them a chance to correct any errors or misunderstandings

It gives your note taker a chance to catch up!

A Useful Guide to




3. Formulate your next question. With practice you will find that this

starts to flow naturally from your paraphrasing – e.g. ...

“So you heard shouting, went out to the office and two team members

were squaring up to each other – what did you do?”


A Useful Guide to




Question 83

Context

Customer service training.

Question

How do I maintain and develop great ongoing relationships with my customers?

Steve‟s Answer

Research reveals that 68% of customers who move on do so because of a lack of

contact, interest or indifference on the part of the supplier. There are three key

steps to ensuring that this does not happen ...

1. Show your customers that you like them! ...

Find out their first names – then use them

Smile when you greet them – even when it‟s on the phone!

Genuinely do your best to help them

Looking for common ground – e.g. “I‟ve just bought one of those

too!”

2. Maintain regular contact ...

Ensure that you keep an up to date database

Find out how they want to be contacted – e.g. by mail, e-mail or

phone

Send them regular updates via their preferred medium

Follow up after they have made an enquiry or purchase

3. Make them feel special ...

Take an interest in what they‟re doing

Follow up when you next speak to them – e.g. “Weren‟t you

building a new conservatory? How did it go?”

Reward their loyalty with special offers

Send them a (personally signed) birthday or Christmas card

As with any relationship, if you don’t pay sufficient attention to the

other person, then the relationship will break down.


A Useful Guide to




Question 84

Context

Creative thinking training.

Question

I always seem to approach things in the same old way. How can I unblock my

thinking and be more creative?

Steve‟s Answer

Three techniques that can be useful for unblocking your creativity are

metaphors, „what if‟ questions and paradoxes.

Metaphors

Much of the language we use when talking about business involves the use of

metaphors – we talk of „flooding the market‟, „pumping money in‟, or „freezing

assets‟. Some of these metaphors have become clichés – so commonly used that

we no longer register the gap between the words used and the message they

convey.

A business presentation will be enhanced by the use of metaphors. Some you

can take „off the shelf‟ (to use another metaphor!) – for example ...

„The mind is like a parachute – it works best when it is opened‟ (The Dalai

Lama)

„People often say that motivation doesn‟t last. Well, neither does bathing.

That‟s why we recommend it daily.‟ (Zig Ziglar)

At other times we might want to illustrate our points by coming up with our own

metaphors. For example, in an e-mail to a colleague when we got stuck while

designing a course I wrote ...

‘It’s like cooking a meal using two very different ingredients. Will it

work best if we mix them together – like duck in a plum sauce; or will it

be better to keep them separate as a main course and dessert, like

chicken and banana?’

This helped to unblock our thinking and make decisions about at which points to

bring different elements of the course together, and at which points to keep

them apart.

„What if‟ Questions

A Useful Guide to




Another useful technique for unblocking creativity is to ask „What if?‟ Paul

Merton‟s surreal flights of fancy on „Have I Got News for You‟ often begin with a

statement like „Wouldn‟t it be great if ...‟

Wouldn‟t it be great if ...

We started doing what we enjoy, rather than what we think will make a

profit?

We told our customers/colleagues/bosses what we really think of them?

We made all public servants wear fancy dress (not just the judges!)

Some „What if?‟ questions you might like to apply to your business – or which

might prompt a reaction if you want to encourage discussion ...

What if ...

We throw out all our policies and procedures and make up the rules as we

go along?

We all stop bothering to turn up in the morning?

Whenever we get a piece of advice, we do the opposite?

Paradoxes

„How wonderful that we‟ve met with a paradox. Now we have hope of making

some progress‟ (Niels Bohr - physicist)

Paradoxes can be a great source of inspiration.

In „A Whack on the Side of the Head – How You Can be More Creative‟, Roger

Von Oech writes „the very act of seeing the paradox is at the crux of creative

thinking – the ability to entertain two different, often contradictory, notions at

the same time‟.

This approach of bringing together these different or contradictory ideas is often

the source of new insights – or at the very least some good jokes!

Some paradoxes for you to mull over ...

„If you can remember the sixties, then you weren‟t there.‟ (Timothy Leary)

„We can‟t leave the haphazard to chance‟ (N. F. Simpson)

„I would not care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as a

member‟ (Groucho Marx)


A Useful Guide to




Steve Westall

Steve Westall, co-author of A Useful Guide to

Managing Meetings, A Useful Guide to Minute Taking

and A Useful Guide to Networking, is a Fellow of the

Chartered Institute of Management Accountants

(FCMA) and has been a trainer and coach since April

2001 after a long and varied career as a senior

manager in BT. He co-founded Pansophix with Ian

Clarke in 2004.

Steve has extensive experience in designing,

developing and delivering ...

Management Development Programmes

Recruitment/Selection and Presentation Skills

Executive Coaching and Mentoring Programmes

Financial Awareness Training and Coaching Workshops.

When he's not writing or with clients Steve plays guitar in his band Cats in the

Kitchen and enjoys cycling for charity!

Links

www.pansophix.co.uk

www.pansophix.com

www.247freetips.com

Contact Details


Telephone: 0845 260 2820; 07860 349294

LinkedIn: http://uk.linkedin.com/pub/steve-westall/0/3ba/76






http://www.youtube.com/user/Thecatsinthekitchen?feature=mhum

http://www.youtube.com/user/Thecatsinthekitchen?feature=mhum


http://www.pansophix.com/

http://www.247freetips.com/


http://uk.linkedin.com/pub/steve-westall/0/3ba/76

A Useful Guide to




Question 85

Context

When delivering Interview Skills Training.

Question

Does it matter what I wear for the interview? Surely they are judging me on my

ability to do the job?

Steve‟s Answer

The impression you make as you arrive for interview is part of what you are

offering. You are making a statement about your personal brand.

Your appearance says a lot about who you are, how you prepare and the

impression you want to make.

Even before you speak you will be creating an important impression so dressing

appropriately is a key part of your “sales pitch”.

Being prepared should always include thinking about your clothes, your

grooming and how you would like to come across.

You want to be remembered for the right things.


A Useful Guide to




Question 86

Context

When I am delivering Presentation Skills Training.

Question

I really need some notes in front of me when I am presenting in case I just

“freeze up” Is this OK?

Steve‟s Answer

Although you may think this is a comforter you will find that you rarely refer to

your notes. Instead you probably end up “waving them about” and provide an

instant distraction for the audience.

It is far better to have your key points on your slides behind you and refer to the

slides as a memory jogger if you lose your place.

Detailed scripts do not work but clear slides and rehearsing beforehand do.

I once coached a solicitor who, for his first presentation, put all of his notes on

“Post Its” and attempted to keep them stuck together as he made his way to the

front of the audience. They came unstuck and floated to the ground in random

order. Full credit to him, he smiled and did without them and surprised both the

audience and himself. He did not need them.


A Useful Guide to




Question 87

Context

When I am delivering Interview Skills Training.

Question

Given that a job application form is my “marketing” document why shouldn‟t I

write up my case on 10 pages if I want to?

Steve‟s Answer

Step back and remember what the recruiter has to do to professionally shortlist

candidates from, often, 100‟s of applications.

The recruiter is trying to assess the extent to which you, as a candidate, meet

the person specifications they have stated for the post they are filling.

The recruiter will be deciding whether you have the attributes they are looking

for – a “yes” or a “no”. They either find evidence in your application or they

don‟t.

You can make it easier for yourself if you list the person specification attribute

headings and write, underneath the headings, a few bullet point examples from

your career/experience on the application form which evidence your experience.

You also make it easier for the recruiter to be able to identify whether you have

the attributes without he/she having to wade through pages of history and

padding.

A good marketing document is concise, relevant, clear and sells you (including

your spelling, grammar and style).


A Useful Guide to




Question 88

Context

When I am mentoring.

Question

Surely the mentor‟s role is to help provide some answers for the mentee? Surely

this is the least a mentee can expect?

Steve‟s Answer

The most effective mentoring relationships start from a different angle.

The mentor‟s role is to help the mentee meet his/her objectives – these need to

be thought through by the mentee at the start of the mentoring relationship.

The mentor can add most value by checking understanding by asking questions

at this stage – questions like ...

“Why would this objective be helpful to you?”

“Why is this objective important in your current position?”

... provide a supportive environment where the mentee thinks through the

rationale and motivation.

Great mentoring relationships are based on the mentee driving the agenda and

using the mentor‟s experience to help them find solutions for themselves.

The relationship is definitely not a “sit there and listen” while knowledge and

solutions burst forth from the learned mentor!


A Useful Guide to




Question 89

Context

Interview Skills training.

Question

What is the point of “Networking”? Surely it‟s a request to gain some business or

influence?

Steve‟s Answer

In your career it is important to build up your range of contacts – people you can

call on for advice and support and, just as importantly, for them to be able to

call on you for yours!

Many people do not appreciate the value of networking – it is a great way of

connecting up with people for mutual benefit.

Although it does happen in a random way over time via contact with colleagues I

would recommend that a contact list has to be built up systematically as part of

a plan for it to be of high value. This means fixing meetings, attending events

etc that bring you into contact with more people.

In a career environment there is no doubt that having contacts (often contacts

already connected to your own) can open up opportunities on a grand scale in

both directions – for you to help them and for them to help you. Just do it!


A Useful Guide to




Question 90

Context

At networking events.

Question

I know you are recommending that I build up my contact list but some of my

“contacts” have been off my radar for a long time. Surely they will be quite

shocked and suspicious when I try to make contact?

Steve‟s Answer

This is a common misconception when re-establishing contact.

In most cases the other party feels just as guilty as you do that they have not

made the effort to keep in touch.

It is important to keep the reconnection low key by introducing yourself politely

and providing a simple context for the call or mail.

The best contexts are ...

“I was tracking through my emails and stumbled across you and thought,

“I ought to give xxx a call!”

“Hi it‟s X here, sorry I have not been in touch for a while, I spotted some

papers with your name on today and thought “I must catch up with you!”

Interestingly the other party normally feels so delighted that you have sought

them out that any feelings of guilt quickly disappear on both sides and it soon

feels like you have not been out of touch at all.

However at the end of the call try to remember to put a date in the diary for a

future meeting or catch up call so that the reconnection has a more permanent

standing!


A Useful Guide to




Sue Cohen

Sue Cohen, author of A Useful Guide to LinkedIn, has

more than 20 years experience in Learning and

Development.

She started her working life as an accountant and

moved into training accountancy and other technical

skills, before moving into skills and management

training. Over the last 20 years, she has helped many

middle and senior managers to develop their

management and personal skills including teamwork and

leadership, performance management, networking and collaboration skills.

For a number of years, she was the senior manager within an in-house training

team for a large firm of accountants, managing a team of trainers and the

budgets, along with various firm-wide projects. She now works as an

independent learning consultant, largely with professional services firms.

When not working with clients Sue is a busy family person and relaxes with

Sudoku puzzles and knitting.

Links

www.suecohen.co.uk

www.suecohen.wordpress.com

Contact Details


Telephone: 07971 400653

LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/suecohen01



http://www.suecohen.co.uk/

http://www.suecohen.wordpress.com/


http://www.linkedin.com/in/suecohen01

A Useful Guide to




Question 91

Context

When training in Presentation skills.

Question

How many slides should I use?

Sue‟s answer

The glib answer is often – as few as possible, with as many images as possible;

the longer answer is “it depends”.

Your slides are visual aids for your audience – if the equipment fails, your

presentation needs to carry on regardless.

Your audience, no matter what the situation, wants to hear what you have to

say and you want them to remember some key messages – a picture/image can

often help with this.

Some complex ideas are best explained with diagrams or bullet points;

sometimes describing an image can be at least as powerful, if not more so.

If you need words, use clear headings and summary bullet points – if you have a

long piece of text, such as an attributed quote or piece of instruction or

legislation which is essential to the audience, let them read it themselves.

Think about how many of your headings and text can be replaced with images

and other props you can use.

The images and words on your slides act as a cue for the audience to remember

things by – they aren‟t there for the presenter to use as a script.

If you need to give out handouts, create appropriate leaflets – this may include

some of the slides / images, but good slides rarely make good reference notes.

Technology being what it is, have a backup plan. Is there a flipchart which you

can use “on the fly” or pre-prepare with pencil drawings; take a printed copy of

slides on A4 or larger, depending on audience size, which you could use as a flip

over presentation – this works really well with a small group.


A Useful Guide to




Question 92

Context

When training networking skills.

Question

I don‟t like networking events – why should I go?

Sue‟s answer

This is one of the biggest issues for many people, although few will talk about

why they don‟t like these events. Awareness of your own issues and openness

about discussing them is a great start to dealing with them. Dislike of

networking events is often down to deep-seated aversion to talking to strangers

and making some kind of presentation i.e. an “elevator pitch”.

It is important to have a good reason to go – which events do you go to and

why? Having a good reason to attend will help to motivate you to want to attend

e.g. to find contacts in your industry; to find potential new contacts in other

industries or sectors; to meet specific types of people as you know they are due

to attend.

There are lots of techniques you can learn to overcome your fears and improve

your skills, if you feel you want to do this. Here‟s a few tips to think about.

Firstly, a childhood message not to talk to strangers is not appropriate for

adults, particularly in business. So, the first thing to think about is how to

convince yourself that this message isn‟t appropriate. One way to do this, is to

think about the new people you have met including new colleagues and

customers – and realising that nothing untoward happened as a result.

Think about the conversations you have with colleagues, customers, suppliers

and friends – most people do not find this difficult.

When you go to networking events, aim to have conversations with people and

be a great person to talk to, without aiming to have business discussions.

Most people like talking about themselves, so ask questions and listen to the

answers. Add a little information and ask another question. Then you will find

talking about yourself a little easier.

At a recent event, I was asked where I‟d come from – the other person meant

which business or company, but I just described my journey and we got talking

about traffic and parking and other “stuff” which provided a fairly relaxed

conversation (and something a little different).

A Useful Guide to




You may need to practise your introduction and elevator pitch – think about a

few key points that will help others understand what your customers gain by

doing business with you.

You want to be memorable such that people want to have further conversations

with you.

Ask them questions about themselves, rather than their business. Aim to have

an engaging conversation – even if you don‟t find out much about each other in

business, you may well remember each other better than those who have spent

time explaining their business to you in detail.


A Useful Guide to




Question 93

Context

When training LinkedIn and networking skills.

Question

Why should I have a picture on my profile – I‟d really like to use my company

logo?

Sue‟s answer

As human beings, we connect with people and people have faces.

As a point of recognition, we recognise thousands of faces and the nuances

between them, even if we don‟t remember names.

Finding someone you‟ve not seen for a while and being able to recognise them

from their photo, particularly for those with popular names or who‟ve changed

their names, is vital.

When we meet new people, we look at their face first and we make judgements.

We do the same online – a clear head and shoulders shot shows who you are

and that you are open to meeting people.

A photo of you sitting at your desk may appear more professional, but, in the

small space available, it makes it harder to see your face. Family and social

pictures belong elsewhere and corporate logos go on corporate profiles.


A Useful Guide to




Question 94

Context

When training LinkedIn and networking skills.

Question

Can I really meet new people online?

Sue‟s answer

The vast majority of us find LinkedIn when someone we know sends us an

invitation to connect. If it‟s someone we know well, we go on to the site, sign

up, add minimal information and accept the invitation.

We carry on accepting invitations from people we know well. If we receive

invitations from people we don‟t know so well, we ignore them – either by

leaving them unanswered or specifically clicking “ignore”. And that‟s how I

started and by March 2009, I had about 30 connections, all of whom I knew

well.

Now I have many, many more and a growing number of them are people I didn‟t

already know, or know well. I‟ve connected with people after only one fleeting

chat at a networking event as well as with people who I‟ve only met “online”.

So, how do I do this and, more important, why?

I do this because this is a great way of expanding my network – I don‟t connect

with “just anybody” – I seek out people whom I think would be useful to connect

with, just like any other form of networking. This includes contacts, potential

suppliers and collaborators as well as potential customers.

If I receive an invitation from someone I don‟t know, I ask them how they found

me – on a few odd occasions, I‟ve been found by people who don‟t seem to

know why they want to connect, so I ignore them.

By and large, the people I approach and the people who approach me, have a

good reason to do so – often common contact/s, past employer even though we

didn‟t work together, members of the same group, industry or interests in

common.

I join groups which I am interested in. This includes networking groups I belong

to; industry-based groups where we discuss issues which are relevant to us and

where there are potential collaborators / associates; groups which contain

people who work within my target market/s.

A Useful Guide to




I regularly meet people face-to-face with whom I already have some kind of

connection – we‟ve joined in discussions, read each other‟s profiles and know

who we have in common.

Our first face-to-face meeting is like a second or third meeting.

In the last few weeks, I‟ve had “first meetings” with four different people – two

were very old friends I‟ve never done business with, and we know each other

well enough to have a good conversation and want to help each other; two

others were people I‟d only met online and we were discussing potential

opportunities at our first meeting.


A Useful Guide to




Question 95

Context

When training new trainers.

Question

I‟m going to be delivering training on some really technical topics. What if I can‟t

answer someone‟s question?

Sue‟s answer

Why do you think they are asking? Are they genuinely interested? Is it a logical

next question from the discussion so far?

You might have an opinion or practical experience which is similar and relevant;

others in the group may also have an opinion. If not, say so and make sure you

get them an answer.

If you are part of an in-house function, it may be very easy to find technical help

and get a response to them; if not, make a note of the question and the person‟s

contact details and let them know when you will be able to get them an answer,

without promising on behalf of someone else.

Watch out for the participant who seems to be trying to catch the trainer out –

be as polite and responsive, and consider a quiet word at the break. Point out

that they seem to be ahead of the rest of the group and, whilst you appreciate

their interest, perhaps they could save the technical questions and discuss them

with the trainer later. If they are really ahead of the group and the materials,

find out why they are there and whether it is appropriate.

If you feel able to do so, and this is often easier for an in-house programme than

an open programme, you may be providing a better service to your customer

(the participant with you and their boss who is paying) by refunding their

payment and sending them back to the office.


A Useful Guide to




Susan Kaer

Susan has been involved in the design, delivery and

management of training and development since 1988

and has worked with organisations in the public,

private and charity sectors.

Susan now works on a freelance basis in and around

Suffolk. Much of her recent work addresses the

relationships between management style and

interpersonal skills and workplace stress, and involves

helping organisations develop their training plans and

strategies, as well as designing and delivering

workshops.

When she's not writing or working with clients Susan

spends her time enjoying the Suffolk countryside with her retired greyhound and

is a trustee of a greyhound rescue charity. She is also a keen Formula 1 fan.

Contact


Telephone: +44 (0)1449 710187


A Useful Guide to




Question 96

Context

When running training in most areas of management skills, especially delegation

or time management.

Question

It takes longer to delegate than to do the job myself – so what‟s the point?

Susan‟s Answer

Delegation isn‟t a quick fix. It may take longer to delegate effectively than to do

the job yourself initially – especially if the task is somewhat complicated or new

to the person doing it, but you should see delegation as an investment of your

time for long term benefits.

With this in mind you need to think carefully about what to delegate, and to

whom. If, for example, your first priority is to release some of your time, then

identify tasks which need doing regularly and which are fairly simple to learn.

This might be something as straightforward as having a colleague screen your

phone calls, and only passing on messages for matters which they can‟t deal

with. The more routine tasks you can delegate which don‟t require much

support, the more time you have to brief team members on more complex

tasks, and monitor their progress.

As their skills and confidence grow, you will be able to take a much more

“hands-off” role and realise the benefits of delegating.


A Useful Guide to




Question 97

Context

When training or coaching managers in appraisal or delegation skills.

Question

A member of my team is reluctant to take on extra responsibility. I think he has

the ability, but he makes comments about not wanting extra pressure, and once

got a bit irritated and said he didn‟t see why he should do my job when I‟m

getting paid for it! He does his own job well, and I think he could go further, but

he doesn‟t seem interested. How should I deal with him?

Susan‟s Answer

There are a number of issues to explore here.

Firstly, remember that the nature of delegation is that you are handing over a

task which is part of your job. Depending on how you do this, team members

might feel they are being dumped on or taken advantage of in some way. Have

you made clear to them that you retain accountability for the job – so if anything

went wrong, you would have to deal with the consequences, rather than any

blame falling on them?

It sounds like you also need to try to understand what motivates them. Maybe

they took the job because it‟s well within their capabilities and they don‟t want

additional pressure, in which case talking of promotion of progression may have

no influence on them.

Are they concerned about their own workload if they take on extra tasks?

Do you need to look at sharing out some of their responsibilities with the rest of

the team?

Do they lack confidence to take on extra responsibility – if so, have you made

clear that you will support them as much as is necessary?

Listening to them to understand what their concerns are and what interests

them may help you identify tasks they are happy to undertake and which will

build up their confidence.

One other point – are you delegating suitable tasks? Some staff related tasks –

such as performance management or dealing with grievances or disciplinary

matters should never be delegated.

Ultimately – if a team member is performing the requirements of their job to an

acceptable level but is not willing to take on additional tasks then you probably

A Useful Guide to




have to accept that. It is likely to influence your thinking if looking at

progression of course, and they should realise this.


A Useful Guide to




Question 98

Context

When delivering assertiveness or communications training.

Question

Someone behaves in a way which I really dislike and it makes me

uncomfortable. I‟m nervous about challenging them, as I can imagine there

would be an almighty row if I tried to tell them how rude they are! What can I

do?

Susan‟s Answer

Lots of people worry about this! It is difficult, especially if someone‟s behaviour

makes us feel emotional. We often put labels on their behaviour – arrogant,

aggressive, bullying etc. – and most of us would probably react if accused in

those sort of terms. So this is an approach which I find works ...

Take time to think about what they DO which upsets you – not how you perceive

it. They may raise their voice, talk over you in meetings, dismiss your

suggestions…have in mind a time and place when it happened so you can give a

really specific example.

Think about the affect it has on you – do you feel intimidated? Undervalued?

Harassed?

And what would you like them to do instead? Tell you in a one to one setting if

there‟s a problem with your work? Refrain from talking loudly when it‟s not

necessary? Allow you to have your say before commenting?

Then rehearse what you‟re going to say using this formula:

When you (describe the behaviour which you want to challenge), I feel (describe

the effect it has on you). I‟d appreciate it if you could (describe the alternative

behaviour you would like).

The benefits of this approach are that you are not labelling the person, just

describing a behaviour which is causing you a problem (that‟s why it‟s important

to be able to give examples if they ask for them). You‟re taking responsibility

for your feelings (rather than saying “you make me feel intimidated”- that might

not be their intention so they‟re likely to become defensive).

And, finally, you‟re offering a constructive way forward. Even if they don‟t agree

wholeheartedly with it, you have the basis for a sensible conversation to find a

mutually acceptable outcome. Back to Index of Questions

A Useful Guide to




Question 99

Context

When coaching or training managers in conducting performance development

plan meetings, but also in conversation with my sister who‟d just had a PDP

meeting with her manager – and was confused!

Question

The form asks for objectives, and then for development objectives. I don‟t really

understand the difference and seem to just end up repeating myself!

Susan‟s Answer

The two are related, but they are quite different things.

Let‟s take the performance objective first. That describes some specific outcome

I should achieve at work which is relevant to my job role. So for example, as a

trainer, I might have an objective ...

“to design and deliver appraisal training to all 100 managers in my area

by the end of March”.

By looking at attendance sheets or training records, my manager and I will be

able to see if I‟ve achieved that. If it‟s something I‟ve done before, there might

not be any development need linked to it. I just have to do it.

However – let‟s say my manager wants me to develop e-learning in order to

achieve that outcome. So my objective might be ...

“to design and develop e-learning modules introducing the appraisal

process, to be accessible to all managers by the end of March”.

I know the appraisal process, but I might not have knowledge or experience of

e-learning design, or of using the authoring tools to develop it. So I will also

have a DEVELOPMENT objective which is ...

“to acquire knowledge of the principles of e-learning design, and to learn

how to use (authoring tool) to build courses and assessment modules”.

The detail of how I‟m going to achieve this would form my development plan,

and might look a bit like this ...

Access suitable reading material to get an understanding of the basics of

e-learning design (will start with CIPD);

Book onto new users course offered by software supplier;

A Useful Guide to




Contact tech support for advice on how to ensure modules are compatible

with our infrastructure;

Review with manager and if agreed necessary book one to one support

from software supplier to get project started.

So – not every PERFORMANCE objective will have a related DEVELOPMENT

objective, but every development objective should be clearly linked to a

performance objective which seeks to measure a workplace outcome!


A Useful Guide to




Question 100

Context

Training managers in the use of a competency framework as part of the

appraisal process.

Question

What do I do if a member of staff has rated their competency higher than I

have? They are meeting but not consistently exceeding the standards required,

and they are a good team worker. I don‟t want the appraisal to turn into an

argument and their work suffers as a result!

Susan‟s Answer

One of the key things with this is to ensure you are both really clear about what

the different ratings mean – not simply taken them as a scale from worst to

best! Typically, a five point rating might look something like this ...

1. significant development needs

2. some development needs

3. consistently meets the required standard for this competency

4. sometimes exceeds the required standard in some aspects of this

competency

5. consistently exceeds the required standard in most aspects of this

competency

So a first rate employee, who has excellent time keeping and attendance,

performs their job well, is a good team player, may still be rated at 3.

Acknowledge their other achievements and qualities elsewhere in the appraisal,

but rating their skill as 5 when it isn‟t will confuse the picture.

Next be clear about what the required standard is for their job. Most

competency frameworks will give fairly generic examples of what is required. So

in relation to communication skills, the exemplar behaviours may look something

like this ...

Communicate with a range of people about a range of subjects

Use communication skills to overcome barriers to effective communication

Use a range of communication methods as appropriate, taking into

account the needs of the other party

A Useful Guide to




Access other resources to facilitate communication where appropriate

It is always helpful if you discuss with your team members the ways in which

you would expect them to demonstrate these behaviours in their role, for

example ...

Who do they communicate with? Public, media, colleagues, external

suppliers, clients ...

What skills do you expect them to use? Active listening, conflict

resolution, visual aids ...

What subjects are they expected to communicate about? Products,

services, health, grievances, disputes, finance ...

What methods should they be using? Email, telephone, presentations,

reports ...

What other resources might they access? Aide-memoire, brochures,

interpreters ...

By explaining what specific examples you are looking for, it should be easier for

you and your team member to agree where their performance currently is, and

where they have potential for more development.


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