Foreman Nietzsche

7/29/2019 Foreman Nietzsche

1/42

/ubueditions2001

Rich ar d For eman

Bad Boy

Niet zsch e


2/42

Bad Boy Nietzsche

By Richard Foreman

Permission kindly granted by the On tological H ysterical Theater

Special th anks to C harles Bernstein

2001 /ubu ed itions

/ubueditions

www.ubu.com

contact: [email protected]/ubu editions series editor: Brian Kim Stefans


3/42

BAD BOY N IETZSCH E

By Rich ar d For eman

Rehear sal scr ipt

Bad Boy Niet zsche Rich ar d For eman


4/42

(Nietzsche on a ch air. Ch ild enters)

NIETZSCHE:

Guess.

THE CH ILD:

You lo ok very differen t fro m the way I

imagined you, Mr. Nietzsche.

NIETZSCHE:

Guess

THE CHILD:

I HAVE read bits and pieces of thin gs youwrite, Mr.Nietzscheso I imagin ed you

big and strong, with eyes on fire.

(Pause)

Is it possible maybe you arent the real

Mr. Nietzsche?

NIETZSCHE:

Guess.

THE CH ILD:

Lets make a test. Suppose I climb up

toward that little horse hanging from the

ceiling, and start beating it and beating itand beating it would you protect that

poor little horse, Mr. Nietzsche?

NIETZSCHE:

Guess!

TH E D ANGERO US MAN:

No g uesses.

NIETZSCHE:

Guess.

TH E DANGERO U S MAN:

No guesses for me, thank you



5/42

NIETZSCHE:Right this minute, guess what Im experi-

encing.


I really dont want to know about th is, Mr.

Nietzsche.

NIETZSCHE:

Stage fright.

TH E D ANG EROU S MAN:

Jesus Christ

Stage fright!

NIETZSCHE:

Whats that beautiful music?

Oh - Im a wonderful da ncer.

Oh - Im a wond erful dancer.

TH E DANGERO US MAN:

Oh , I bet this is gonn a be special.

NIETZSCHE:

Oh no

Lets face it. Nobody likes being chained

to the wall by somebody elses imagina-

tion.

Please! Wipe me out!


Id do it if I could, Mr. Nietzsche.

NIETZSCHE:

You can do it. I want things said to me

that will be very disturbing not to o ther

people of course, but to myself in particu-

lar.

I want th ings said to me, that will cut into

me like a knife. In t hat hope, I want every-

bodys collabora tion



6/42

THE CHILD:

Why should we collaborate with you, Mr.

Nietzsche? A: We do not trust you, and B:

we do not like you

NIETZSCHE:

Really? You d on t like me?

Tell me why you d on t like me

THE CH ILD:

Well, first of a ll, we don t know you well

enough to have definite opinions

NIETZSCHE:

OK, dont try to know me better than you

know me right th is minute. O K?

Just sustain this same level of ho stility for

no particular reason because, I need to

experience this kind of pressure.

Rememb er Ill p ay very well.


Let me think about this

(exit)

THE C H ILD: (in with cake and 1 cand le)Hey. Is your mind really on fire, Mr.

Nietzsche?

Is this candle for you? Do you like can-

dles?

NIETZSCHE:

In fact, what I like is cake.

THE CHILD:

OK. The ca kes for you too.

NIETZSCHE:

I dont deserve it, I suppose

THE C HILD:

Right



7/42

NIETZSCHE:

Right. Look at me carefully. Im an every-

da y person in fact.

THE C HILD:

Not really. I t hink your mind is on fire,

Mr. Nietzsche

NIETZSCHE:

No. There is no fire inside me

THE CH ILD:

Then how do you manage to capture myattention , Mr. Nietasche?

NIETZSCHE:

Yes. Yes? . . . Yes! I accept tha t

THE CHILD:

Then how do you manage to capture my

attention , Mr. Nietasche?

NIETZSCHE:

Please, be very careful.

THE C HILD:Why should I be carefu l, Mr. Nietzsche?

NIETZSCHE:

It could be that I am dangerous in my pas-

sivity


See? Your passivity is somethin g ver y

intense after all, Mr. Nietzsche

NIETZSCHE:

Perhaps.

THE CHILD:

No Maybe! That s what the word per-

haps really means, really it does. Am I



8/42

right?


You re r ight.

THE CHILD:

But in fact, I want nothing more to do

with you, Mr. Nietzsche.


Shes right, of course.

NIETZSCHE:

Cast back upon my own resources.

THE CH ILD:

Knock knock! Mr. Nietzsche.

NIETZSCHE:

Knock knock?

Who s talking t o me?


H ey- Nobo dy said n oth ing

NIETZSCHE:

No, somebody who is outsideis trying to get inside

(Big heads appear)

My dear friends.

After you d iscover me, you find me. The

difficulty is now to lose me, Friedrich

Nietzsche. Careful.

THE DANGEROUS MAN: (indicates

woman above, in the mountains,

stripped to th e waist. Wearing a head -

dress)

Who is that woman up there?

NIETZSCHE:

Well, th is is a person who c laim s, she is

unable to live without me.



9/42


You?

NIETZSCHE:

This is what she secretly tells me.


You?

NIETZSCHE:

Not that I believe this is true.

TH E D ANG EROU S MAN:Really?

NIETZSCHE:

Do I believe this is true?


Well? Do you b elieve it?

NIETZSCHE:

Yes.


Yes is it?Then whatever happens, youll never

move from this spot.

NIETZSCHE:

. . .Perhaps perhaps not. P erhaps, per-

haps not


I dont understand your hesitation.

NIETZSCHE:

No. There is no hesitation.

(Pause)

This is para dise, after all




10/42

This doesnt look like Paradise, does itnow?

NIETZSCHE:

Wrong.

Feet, placed firmly on the floor


Pick up your feet when you walk.

NIETZSCHE:

This is Paradise

(B EAUTIFUL WOMAN:

Paradise)The oh so poignant torso, twisting slightly

to suggest unimagina ble d irections.

(B EAU TIFUL WOMAN:

Paradise)

A certain dizziness entering history by

accident,.


I d ont get it, obviously

NIETZSCHE:

Here I am, doing my thing in Paradise.

I write on paper, write on wallwith foolish heart a foolish scrawl.

You say the hand s of fools

deface the table and the wall

erase it all! Erase it!

I try to help th e best I can

I wield a sponge, as you recall

but when the cleaning up is done

lets see this super sage emit

upon the walls, sagacious shit!

(on floor, a s if beat-

en down. )


Jesus Christ.

I heard one bad boy, I.E. Bad Boy

Nietzsche, using the word Pa radise



11/42

but th is does not look like Parad ise the

way I imagined it.

NIETZSCHE:

Wrong.


What s wrong ab out it.

NIETZSCHE:

Here I am . Doing my thing, in a place that

looks very much like Pa rad ise.


If Mr. Nietzsche says so, then I g uess this is

really Para dise.

NIETZSCHE:

Here is a list of potent items.

A cro wn

THE CHILD: (Crown on horse)Oh yes, heres a really nice crown

NIETZSCHE:

A dru m

THE CHILD:

Here comes a big drum

NIETZSCHE:

Hand

THE CHILD:

But th ere are so man y hand s available, Mr.Nietzsche. How can we choose just one?

NIETZSCHE:

Blindfold! Blindfold!



12/42


Under the circumstances, a blindfold

might be appropriate

NIETZSCHE:

Knife.


OK.

NIETZSCHE:

Is a chair appro priate.


Cha ir. Very appropriate

THE CHILD:

Maybe you favor physical o bjects over peo -

ple, Mr. Nietzsche.

NIETZSCHE:

Maybe tha t hurts people, but that s OK.

Because I do no t favor people. No not

people but whats inside people. Again

and again. Shaking things to their very

foundations. My iron fist. My feet like fire.My knife like a terrible kiss. Stabbing one-

self hands covered with blood

TH E B EAUTIFUL WOMAN:

Beautiful white wings. Red blood falling

from the eyes.

NIETZSCHE:

That which is oppressive to me, all that I

hurl into the depths. Once and for all.

THE BEAUTIFUL WOMAN:

Wings.

NIETZSCHE:

Yes! Wings! The d ivine ar t is flying to



13/42

great heights from which one throws whatis oppressive into the depths of the ocean!

Shipwreck!

NIETZSCHE:

I throw myself into that ocean

Shipwreck!

I do th row myself into th at terrible ocean!


Not much of a da ncer, are you Mr.

Nietzsche?

TH E B EAUTIFUL WOMAN:A better dancer than a singer maybe.

THE CHILD:

OK, everybody start da ncing! And

again! And again!

(Puppet appears, boat, action,

etc)

(VOICE: Shipwreck, shipwreck, ship-

wreckRemember)

THE CHILD:

He thought he saw a giant boatBeneath a silver moon

He looked again and saw it was

H is lonely living ro om

He thought he saw the sailors

Throwing brea dcrumbs toward the sea

He looked aga in and saw

A giant fish is eating me!

Help help help

NIETZSCHE:

Ow! A splinter, my finger....




14/42

Hey

Look what I found.

This is for you, Mr. Nietzsche.

OK. Let me correct myself. Mr. Ba d B oy

Nietzsche

NIETZSCHE:

Whats in the briefcase.


Jesus Christ I dont know.

NIETZSCHE:

Open it.


Oh come on now Are you afraid to

open it?

NIETZSCHE:

Fools have known all along


What fools?

NIETZSCH E: (pa use)

The on e thin g necessary


Yes?

NIETZSCHE: (Pause)

Is to keep pen in motion over the

paper.

The pen scribbles? I say to hell withthat.

Well, to hell with th at . And I say No t o

belief systems of a ll kind s


Don t d o tha t, Mr. Nietzsche



15/42

NIETZSCHE:

With thick strokes my writing flows so full

and broad.

So what if its illegible? Ow!

Who reads the stuff I write?

I hurt my shoulder


I think Mr. Nietzsche ha d a n a ccident


Theres not much we can d o abo ut acci-dents. They happen

THE C HILD:

We could get m edica l help

TH E B EAU TIFUL WOMAN:

Is your shoulder really that bad? Are you a

Bad Bad B oy?

NIETZSCHE:

It still hurts, but not so much. I don t

think its broken.


Oh its not broken.

NIETZSCHE:

But, I hurt my hand


Oh? Your H AND?

NIETZSCHE:

My writing h and .


Then your scribbling day are over, right?

THE CH ILD:



16/42

Wha ts wron g, Mr. Nietzsche?

NIETZSCHE:

Once upon a time I tried writing a letter

to a beloved friend, using my left ha nd,

but th e letter was unread able, of course

not b ecause of its content, which came

from my heartbut using my left hand I

could only partially control th e format ion

of letter after letter after letter!

Ow! I h urt my left hand!

NIETZSCHE:

I better use my right ha nd to cut someslices from this holy bread which enters

my life like an unexpected guest.


Your righ t ha nd ? You mea n your writing

han d, Mr. Nietzsche?

NIETZSCHE:

Have some slices of this holy bread which

trembles in expectation .


That looks like normal bread to me, Mr.Nietzsche

NIETZSCHE:

There are valuable jewels in this bread.


What d id you say?

NIETZSCHE:

This bread is very unusual. You eat it

you grow bigger. Your body becomes

strong and your head double


Is that rea lly desirable? Such a big head ?



17/42

NIETZSCHE:There are jewels, valuable jewels in this

holy bread


I hear d h im say something unusual.


So did we all


H e said there are Jews in this bread.

NIETZSCHE:No, no, you misunderstand m e. There are

jewels, valuable jewels in th is bread .


I would not eat this bread if there were

Jews in this bread.

(Pause)

You un derstand why I say that ? Jews I d o

not eat Jews.

You bet ter ma ke me believe there are n o

Jews in this bread, because, my dear Fritz,

if there are Jews in th is bread , then I will

put no t even th e tiniest morsel of thisbread in my mouth. But on the oth er

hand if I am certain there are no Jews

in this bread, then I will open my mouth,

and extend my tongue in the manner I

am abo ut to demonstrate, and allow a few

tiny crumbs of bread on the tip of my

extended tongue.

NIETZSCHE:

I do no t move


If you do nt move, youre in t rouble, Mr.

Nietzsche.

NIETZSCHE:



18/42

I hope t o prove to you, however, that I donot bake Jews in this bread. So please.

Feed me some of my own bread .

NIETZSCHE:

I would n ever eat b read baked with Jews

inside. Because to do so, would be to h urt,

terrib ly. . .


Lets find o ut.

NIETZSCHE:

what I ha ve in my stoma ch now noJews in th ere

only jewels baked in my bread, now in

my stoma ch.

Can you possibly understand how painful

to me to have sharp jewels inside ones

stomach?


I am imagining that

NIETZSCHE:

You tell me wha t it feels like in the ima gi-nation


It would be very painful

NIETZSCHE:

Yes! It is!


Like broken g lass

NIETZSCHE:

Yes! It is!


Or long splinters, driven into t he ha nds ,



19/42

or into the feet.Or eyes wide open

NIETZSCHE:

Please stop


Staring straight into th e sun, which is

probably the most painful thing I can

think of splinters going into my eyes!

(VOICE)

(3)Eyes Eyes eyes

NIETZSCHE:

Where is my Chin ese horse?


THE DANGEROUS MAN: (overlapping)

What the h ell are you talking abo ut?

I don t und erstand you, Mr. Nietzsche


H ere is a voice we da re not allow to speakdirectly because the madness of this voice

is infectious, and if one hears this voice

speaking directly for itself, one is intoxi-

cated by such speaking,

one leaps from high windo ws, one

plunges into wide rivers from the power

of whose turbulence no escape seems

possible.

TH E CHI LD: (singing, prancing)

I know where tha t voice is coming from

I know where this voice is coming from

VOIC E: (as horse on, oth ers run off, N

hides head, th en embra ces horse)

H ere is a ma n Here is a man , here is a



20/42

man who simply cann ot opt out of h is ownself-destructive motives who listens to

himself on ly.

NIETZSCH E: (a s ho rse is beat en. )

Where is my Chinese H orse?

Where is my Chinese H orse?


Hard to believe, Frederick Nietzsche,

philosopher of power the missing

years of sweet, gentle, Bad Boy

Nietzsche years in the desert, in the

lonely mounta ins of China unknownyears in lonely rooms in Chinese rooming

ho uses visited in secret by th e

Ghosts of wise men seeking power

ghosts of ancient Ch ina.

THE CH ILD:


NIETZSCHE:

This is my Chin ese Ho rse.


Chinese or no Chinese,That doesnt mean shit to m e


I can relate to th is, please I too am ban-

ished to some nether region, where the

best I can do is to try understand ing the

godd amn rules on th is particular shit

house planet


Sorry about this, Mr. Nietzsche.


Im never sorry!




21/42

spiritual self-lacera tion is not to mytaste.

NIETZSCHE:

Nobody sees my Chinese Horse.



THE CHILD:

Is it not true that to pursue and sing

what ever one truly desires inside each

mom ent as it passes this is to p ursue

incoherence in fact.

THE DANGEROUS MAN: (overlapping)

Chinese whores and h orses! C hinese hors-

es and who res!

S & THE DANGEROUS MAN:

True! True ! True! True!


Mr. Nietzsche is a man who sees the dark-

ness, where other people think there is a

light still shinin g

TH E D ANG EROU S MAN:That doesnt mean shit to this tough

Chinaman!


Shit heads of the en tire world. Do you

really believe th at Mr. Nietzsche s purpose

here on earth is to bring light into places

where up till now there h as been dar k-

ness?

NIETZSCHE: (sings)

Nobody sees my Chinese horse

THE C H ILD: (with whip)

You ve never even been to C hina , you bad

bad bad boy



22/42

NIETZSCHE:

whip me, sir, and you whip my horse.

Whip my horse, sir and I, also, suffer

tho se same blows. Rememb er Ill pay

you very well.

TH E CH ILD: ( sings)

Jews in my bread.... Ow!

NIETZSCHE:

Nobody sees my Chinese horse!

THE CHILD:... I have millions of Jews in my bread.


This does not look like China, you crazy

man!

NIETZSCHE:

I am on m y way...

I am on m y way...

(VOIC E)(B ig activity, th rowing props))

Here is a man

Here is a man

Remember

NIETZSCHE:

What do I need. I meanNEED

most of all

THE BEAUTIFUL WOMAN: (over)

Say Need, Mr. Nietzsche. Say What do I

Neeeeeeed!

NIETZSCHE:

I need you looking at me.




23/42

I NEED it too, Mr. Nietzsche you look-ing at me. Are you looking at me?


Why is everybod y looking a t m e.

THE C HILD:

Nobodys looking at you


How the hell do I know what kind of

movements to make next?

TH E D ANG EROU S MAN:Stage fright!

ALL:

Stage fright! Stage fright!


Thought has now come, to far away

China.

Thought is now upside down,

on th e other side of the world,

something wiped out

immense,

where death rules things

NIETZSCHE:

This does not m ean th at d eath rules

things


Death? I better look that up in my

Chinese dictionary, but in the mean time,

lets have drinks! Drinks for everybody

THE CH ILD:

Drinks on a n empty stoma ch?


Why the h ell not.



24/42

THE CHILD: wed stagger around being drunk


That sounds OK to me


There is bread , to calm such terrib le

stomachs


Where the h ell did that terrible bread

come from?

NIETZSCHE:

Do not b e afraid! Do no t be afraid! I will

protect this holy bread from wind, rain,

thunder and lightening


Careful, shithead Nietzsche. There are

jewels in tha t brea d!


If there are really jewels in that holy

bread, which I dont think very likely

NIETZSCHE:

There a re jewels in this holy brea d


that would make it god d amn d anger-

ous to eat that holy bread

THE CHILD:

Oh how dangerous could bread be?


Dangerous enough that we could die from

this holy bread.

If we ate th is holy bread, we could all die.




25/42

Since we are all going to die from thisbread or maybe not from this bread it

doesnt matter what happens to us.

Therefo re, we should kill people


Wha t peo ple should we kill

THE BEAUTIFUL WOMAN: (Pause)

People we don t like. People who are

already dead

THE CHILD:

That means lots of famous people

TH E D ANGERO U S MAN:

This is all very interestin g.

NIETZSCHE:

Rememb er Ill p ay you very well.

TH E DANGEROUS MAN:(h its Nietzsche

with golf club)

Jesus Ch rist maybe you should work out

a little, Mr. Nietzsche. I don t thin k you

look sufficiently muscular.

THE CHILD:

Oh no He d oesnt look even a little bit

muscular.

NIETZSCHE:

Im n ot supposed to be muscular


Of course wed be a little worried if you

got TOO muscular

U p on your feet, Mr. Nietzsche! C ome on

now

NIETZSCHE:

I can do th at b y myself.



26/42

TH E DANGERO U S MAN:Turn a roun d. Loo k me in the eye

NIETZSCHE:

Im already doing that


I want you to hold our your arms. Good. I

want you to whisper loud eno ugh so that

we can a ll hear you whispering H ello!

Am I a prophet flying over the countryside

looking into th e future?

NIETZSCHE:Yes, I a m.


Well, yes I am, yes I am...

(hits Nietzsche again and again)

NIETZSCHE:

Do you very much like playing golf?


As a matter of fact, I do like playing golf.

NIETZSCHE:Really?


I like it.

NIETZSCHE:

Why?


No reason.

But you know how much I like golf.

NIETZSCHE:

No, I didnt know that.




27/42

Weve been fr iends for ten years

NIETZSCHE:

Ten long years.


Ten wond erful year s.

NIETZSCHE:

Ten long years.


After ten years of friendship, you should

know golf is one of my favorite hobbies.

NIETZSCHE:

You kno w what?. I ve seen you going off t o

play golf so often , Ive concluded its a

hobby


Right. I like it

NIETZSCHE:

I believe you.


I like it.

NIETZSCHE:

You like it because you re goo d a t it

THE CHILD:

H e hopes to get better

And better.

And better and better and better!


Excuse me, Mr. Nietzsche, bu t wasnt

there supposed to be mon ey in th is for

the rest of us?



28/42

NIETZSCHE:A promise is a pro mise.


Oo oh. The G ods provide.

Where does all this wonderful money

come from, Mr. Nietzsche?

NIETZSCHE:

I dont want to know such things


Right. Some people get nervous about

money

NIETZSCHE:

How did it come to be that there is money

rather than n o money.


Thank goodness.

NIETZSCHE:

Ho w did the world itself decide to invent

and spew forth mon ey.

Take off your shoes, please.


You d on t mean take off our shoes?

NIETZSCHE:

I promised lots of money. Im going to

stuff ten dollar bills inside every-

bodys shoes.


Thats crazy

NIETZSCHE:

Yes Im goin g to squ eeze ten do llars

inside this shoe, and another

ten do llars, and lots and lots of

crumpled up ten d ollar bills



29/42


This is crazy

NIETZSCHE:

OK. With ten dollar bills stuffed inside

everybod ys sho es, are th ose

shoes a little bit uncomfort -

able maybe?

THE CH ILD:

My shoe is very uncomfortable

NIETZSCHE:Yes! But ha ving th ose extra ten d ollars

makes. being un comforta ble

O.K.


Ten d ollars no t a b ig sum, Mr. Nietzsche

NIETZSCHE:

Ten d olla rs? -Well, ten do llar s is ten

dollars my friend


OK. We have ten dollars in our shoes.Now what.

NIETZSCHE: (Indicates tank)

OK. Why don t all three of you

just squeeze inside that ugly

thing


That ugly thing?

NIETZSCHE:

Squeeze inside please!


Do you imagine us having sex inside that

thing, Mr. Nietzsche



30/42

NIETZSCHE:

No. I never said t hat


Guess what, Mr. Nietzsche. Imagine it, and

it might happen

THE C H ILD: (a s all three enter)

Ob viously its going to happen happen


Obviously.

NIETZSCHE:

I do not love my neighbor near/ but wish

he, or she were high up and far

away. /How else could he, o r

she, become my guiding star?


All don e in here, Mr. Nietzsche

NIETZSCHE:

What happened to th e ten d ollars, please?

THE BEAUTIFUL WOMAN:Do n t worr y, its still in our sho es.

NIETZSCHE:

OK. Take out the money, and now see if

the mon ey STINKS!

THE BEAUTIFUL WOMAN: (Pause)

You ve been a very bad boy, Mr.

Nietzsche

NIETZSCHE:

Yes I have Tell me how Ive been bad

THE DANGEROUS MAN: (indicate

Woman )

You h ad sex with th is lad y, I believe



31/42

NIETZSCHE:

No, tha ts not possible.


A certa in species of g irlfriend ; a possible

wife; an everlasting bun dle of look but

dont touch.

NIETZSCHE:

I have not done this terrible thing.


But you ha ve

NIETZSCHE:

In m y dreams only.

TH E CH ILD : (a s Woma n kisses Niezsche)

We all love Ch inese ba bies.

NIETZSCHE: (pushing Woman away)

No! In my dreams I have.

So punish me for such terrible dreams

TH E D ANG EROU S MAN: (g ives sword )OK, Mr.Nietzsche. P unishment can some-

times be handed out on demand . But

other times

a big surprise.

TH E B EAUTIFUL WOMAN (U nd ressing)

Wha ts wron g, Mr Nietzsche?

NIETZSCHE: (Pause, as others undress)

Lest her happiness oppress us

cloak yourself in devilish tresses

Devilish wit and devilish dresses,

All in vain !

(sword to h is own neck))

H er eyes express

her an gelic



32/42

saintliness.


Wha ts wron g, Mr. Nietzsche

THE CH ILD:

Wha ts wron g Mr Nietzsche?

NIETZSCH E: (a s orgy begins)

This too shall pass


This will not pass, buddy.

NIETZSCHE:

This will pass.

This will not pass.

Falls on bench)

I have this appendage on the front of my

body that swells up sometimes. Its called

my penis, maybe

A grea t variety of species on this plan et

have a similar system that swells up. But

why is this necessary? Why? Why?

THE BEAUTIFUL WOMAN:Maybe the grid on which you chart your

experience is never your exper ience, Mr.

Nietzsche.

NIETZSCHE:

Oh, Why is she clever now, and so refined?

On her account a man s now out of his

mind.

His head was good before he took this

whirl

He lost his head to the a foresaid girl!

(Woman captures him in

a white sheet)

I have this appendage on the front of

my bo dyit swells up sometimes



33/42


Make some babies, Mr. Nietzsche

NIETZSCHE:

Babies? No- !!.


Millions and millions of babies making

millions and millions of thoughts. Millions

of tho ughts until that one d ay comes,

when every possible thought has finally

been th ought, Mr. Nietsche!

NIETZSCHE:

Is that possible?


Butit takes a lot of bab ies until all possi-

ble thoughts,can fina lly be though t. So

thenthis whole rotten , beautiful planet

can just STOP , Mr. Nietzsche.

Not death maybe,

but something even mo re interesting.

NIETZSCHE:

Oh my Go d. Shipwreck! Shipwreck!

THE CHILD:

Shipwreck! Shipwreck!

THE CHILD:

Your b oa t is read y, Mr. Nietzsche. Your

boat is now ready, Mr. Nietzsche!


Whats wrong?

NIETZSCHE:

Theres no b oat.



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THE DANGEROUS MAN:I know theres no bo at.

NIETZSCHE:

Theres no bo at. Nobo dy climbs on b oard

because theres no bo at


You a lread y said tha t, Mr. Nietzsche.

NIETZSCHE:

I said that because I want things said that

will cut into m e like a knife. I want that

kind of p ressure

(Bell)

VOIC:

Your boa t is now r ead y for d elivery, Mr

Nietzche.

NIETZSCHE:

Was I ill? Have I got well?

Oh my memory is rotten

But th ose are well who h ave forgotten!

(whip him)

There is no boat!


Im sorry to tell you, My Nietzsche. You

hurt people. Just like everybody else.

NIETZSCHE:

That was never my intention

THE CHILD:

Everybody h urts everybod y, Mr. Nietzsche.

NIETZCHE: (att acked)

Oww!




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See what I mean, Mr Nietzsche? You reallyhurt people

THE CH ILD:

Nobody reads the stuff you write, Mr.

Nietzsche.


Nobody wants your babies, Mr. Nietzsche.


Nobody offers you hugs and kisses.

NIETZSCHE:OK. To bring a little bit of happiness to

somebod y who deserves, of course, no

real happiness Ill just lock myself

forever inside this ugly thing and Ill

never come out .


You re still no t in side it, Mr. Nietzsche.

NIETZSCHE:

Im never coming out, believe me?

TH E DANGERO US MAN:Nobody can live forever inside that thing.

NIETZSCHE:

Im n ever coming out.


You won t co me out?

NIETZSCHE:

Im n ever coming out!

THE C HILD:

Ok. If youre never c coming out, th en we

can b eat th e shit out of this poor little

horse as much as we like, and nobo dys



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going to stop us. Right Mr. Nietzsche?Right? Right?

(Beat h orse, tank

advances, scream. Nietzsche

dances)

THE CHILD:

You lied to u s, Mr. Nietzsche. You said you

were never coming out.

NIETZSCHE:

Yes, I said tha t. B ut h ow is that possible?

Beca useI n ever lie.

THE END



37/42

TH E D ANGERO U S MAN: (g ives sword )

OK, Mr. Nietzsche, punishment ca n some -

times be handed out on demand but

other times a big surprise.

NIETZSCHE: (Pause, as others undress)

Lest her happiness oppress us

cloak yourself in devilish tresses

Devilish wit and devilish dresses,

All in vain! H er eyes express

her angelic saintliness.

TH E B EAUTIFUL WOMAN:Wha ts wron g, Mr. Nietzsche

THE CHILD:

Wha ts wron g Mr Nietzsche?

NIETZSCH E: (a s orgy begins)

This too shall pass


This will not pass, buddy.

NIETZSCHE:

This will pass.(takes off pant s)

I have this appendage on the front of my

body that swells up sometimes. Its called

my penis, maybe. A grea t variety of species

on this planet have a similar system that

swells up. But why is this necessary? Why?

Why?


Maybe the grid on which you char t your

experience is never your experience, Mr.

Nietzsche.

NIETZSCHE:

Oh, Why is she clever now, and so refined?

On her account a man s now out of his



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mind.His head was good before he took this

whirl

He lost his head to the a foresaid girl!

(J captures him in white sheet)

I have this appendage on the front of

my bo dyit swells up sometimes


Make some ba bies, Mr. Nietzsche

NIETZSCHE:

No- !!.


Millions and millions of babies making

millions of t hough ts. Millions of tho ughts

until every possible thought has finally

been th ought, Mr. Nietsche!

NIETZSCHE:

Is tha t rea lly possible?

Butit takes a lot of babies unt il all possi-

ble, can finally be thought. So thenthe

whole plan et can just STOP , Mr.

Nietzsche.

Not death maybe,

but something even m ore interesting.

NIETZSCHE:

Oh my G od. Shipwreck! Shipwreck!

THE CH ILD:

Shipwreck! Shipwreck!

THE CH ILD:

Your b oa t is read y, Mr. Nietzsche. Your

boat is now ready, Mr. Nietzsche!




39/42

Whats wrong?

NIETZSCHE:

Theres no boat.


I know theres no boa t.

NIETZSCHE:

Theres no bo at. Nobod y climbs on boa rd

because theres no boa t


You a lread y said tha t, Mr. Nietzsche.

NIETZSCHE:

I said that because I want things said tha t

will cut into me like a knife. I want that

kind of pressure

(Bell)

VOICE:

Your boa t is now read y for d elivery, Mr

Nietzche.

NIETZSCHE:Was I ill? Have I got well?

Oh my memory is rotten

But th ose are well who h ave forgotten !

(whip)

There is no boat!

(run around)

(fall)


Im sorry to tell you, My Nietzsche. You

hurt people.


Well, I m sorry to tell you, Mr. Nietzsche.

You h urt p eople.



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NIETZSCHE:That was never my intention

Oww Oww


See what I mean? You really hurt people

Mr. Nietzsche.

THE CHILD:

Nobody reads the stuff you write, Mr.

Nietzsche.


Nobody wants your babies, Mr. Nietzsche.


Nobo dy offers you hu gs and kisses.

NIETZSCHE:

OK. To bring a little bit of happiness to

somebody who deserves no real happiness

of course Ill just lock myself forev-

er inside this ugly thing and Ill never

come out.


You re still not inside it, Mr. Nietzsche.

NIETZSCHE:

Im never coming out, believe me?


Nobody can live forever inside that thing.

NIETZSCHE:

Im n ever coming out.


You won t co me out?

NIETZSCHE:

Im n ever coming out!



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NIETZSCHE:Im n ever coming out!

THE CH ILD:

Ok. If youre never c coming out, t hen we

can b eat the shit out of this poor little

horse as much as we like, and nobo dys

going to stop us. Right Mr. Nietzsche?

Right? Right?

(Bea t hor se, tank ad vances,

scream. Nietzsche dances)

THE CHILD:You lied to u s, Mr. Nietzsche. You said you

were never coming out.

NIETZSCHE:

Yes, I said t ha t. But how is tha t possible?

BecauseI n ever lie.

THE END



42/42

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Foreman Nietzsche

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