Chapter Six

Plot twists! Intrigue!

Grilled Cheese! Yup,

it’s a day in the life of

Dagmar.

Welcome back to Finding

Consort Redux by Kelyns!

It’s the same old silly story,

now in PowerPoint! This chapter was originally

Chapter 7 Part 3, in case

anyone was wondering,

and let’s get to it. I believe

we left off with Dagmar

coming to terms with her

new life as a live-in maid…

Ch 6:

Low Day

D: "WAAAAHHHHH! My Life is over!"

You all may remember that Dagmar has recently been impressed into a life of

servitude for Denise Jacquet, Gilbert's mother. So this part of the chapter is all about her, told from her point of view. Why? Because it's fun watching others suffer! And after all the damage Dagmar did to this story, I'd say she deserves it.

And Veronica doesn't mind one bit this time.

V: "Are you kidding me? This chapter's gonna be awesome!"

Anyway, back to the recap. With a little "persuasion," Dagmar changed her life's aspiration to pursuing the almighty cheesy goodness found only in a perfectly toasted grilled cheese sandwich.

But that's not why her life is over, nor is it the reason for her tears.

No, the reason for all of that would be this woman, and one of my new favorite sims, Denise Jacquet. Denise basically threatened to kill Dagmar if she even thought about escaping and was able to back up the threat by revealing how she

murdered her husband.

Needless to say Denise is a devious, conniving, and deadly skilled murderer, and so Veronica and I like her both.

V: "Definitely; if only I could learn from such wisdom!"

So, readers, sit back, relax, maybe even grab a snack like Veronica has here, and prepare to read Finding Consort Chapter 6, A Day In The Life Of Dagmar.

Greetings, peons. Come to make fun of my torture sentence, have you? Hmmph, fine. As KB said earlier, I will be narrating this part of the chapter. Since my cheese transformation, my thoughts have been incessantly filled with cheese. But don't

worry, all my cheesy thoughts have been edited out for you in order for this chapter to make sense, although few transgressions may slip through now and then. Now where did we leave off?

Oh, yes, that annoying old maid made me clean up the kitchen after dinner.

"What did you just say?"

"Nothing, ma'am, nothing..."

"Good. Then it's time for bed. Let me show you your room."

Bed? But it's only 8:00...

"Here's where you'll be staying."

"...But there are two beds."

"Yes that's because you will be sharing my room with me."

"Heh, heh... are you serious? I don't do sharing."

"Are you seriously asking me that question?"

*GULP* "N-No..."

"Now I'll wake you up tomorrow at five, but don't expect me to do so every morning because-"

"Wait, wait, wait. Five? As in five AM?"

"Of course! You have a lot of work to do! Plus one of your chores is to make breakfast for—”

"Hold it! Back up. Explain this "work" thing. As a townie I never had a job; I just did whatever CrumpleBottom told me to. And if she didn't have any assignments for me, I got to do whatever I pleased."

"Heh, heh, well, sweetie, that certainly won't be happening here. I expect you to take on the role of maid, gardener, and butler, and since you have virtually no useful skills, I have to train you. Which means I have to take time out of my busy

schedule to teach you."

"And... just what are these activities, exactly?"

"Well, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, first you make breakfast for me and Gilbert. I usually go for my morning jog around six, and I expect breakfast

to be ready by the time I get back; Gilbert should be awake by then, too. Then you have to tend the garden. You came just in time; it's planting season. After that, you make lunch and clean up the house, which is followed by your lessons-"

"Lessons?”

"Yes, I said I'd train you didn't I?”

“Then after lessons, you prepare dinner, which is formal, so wash up before you eat. After dinner, you clean up the kitchen, right before you wash up and go to bed."

"You can't seriously expect me to do all of that by myself."

"I can, and you will do exactly as I say, or you can expect me to turn you into my secret ingredient for my chili. Don's not the only one who can put brains in chili!"*

*From Candi020765's Uglacy and Prettacy. Go read it. After this, of course.

"There are labor laws you know!"

"Pfft, not in this neighborhood. And don't count on the police, either. They're too busy messing with the uni kids."

"I-I-I'm still gonna get you... somehow..."

"Yeah, you and what army? Now get ready for bed; I don't need you passing out during your chores tomorrow. Oh, and there are some clothes for you in the dresser. Most of it are just some old things of mine, but Gilbert convinced me to get a few new outfits for you, as you have nothing except the clothes on your back."

"That's, um, nice of you."

"I know. Don't expect me to be so nice in the future. Now, lights out in ten, and the bathroom's down the hall."

Okay, so let's see what we got here.

Yeesh, icky. Next.

Um, jury's out on this one. What does she think this is, anyway? A ranch?

Hmm, not bad, but I see we haven't left the barn.

Okay, no. This has GOT to stop. I know I wear a cowgirl hat, but come on!

Okay, ENOUGH with the cowgirl/ranch stuff. There GOT to be something else in here.

When I said something else, I didn't mean this. Now I look like an old lady. ...Or Regina what'sherface...

Okay, who ever made this should have let this trend die. It looks like it's straight from the 1950s. Wait... Didn't that old coot say some of this stuff is hers? This dress probably is from the 1950s. I'm wearing a 50 year old dress, aw, geez!

Talk about 1950s. *Sigh* I look like an old maid... Oh, brother, I did not mean that pun.

Aw, geez, come on! What is with this stuff? Isn't there something more recent in this wardrobe?

Apparently not. What is this? Home on the prairie with the social worker?

Now I look like a nanny... Or a modern day CrumpleBottom... ARGH! THERE'S GOT TO BE SOMETHING DECENT IN THIS CLOSET!

V: Heh, heh. Looks like someone got all the reject clothes that KB never lets her favorite simmies wear... Not only does she have to be Denise's maid, but she gets to look stupid doing it!

Ten minutes later, I was still trying to find something to wear when Den- I mean Mrs. Jacquet walked in.

DJ: "Oh, that looks good. Wear that tomorrow."

D: "Are you serious? I look like a hillbilly farmer."

DJ: "Which is why it's perfect. You start with the gardening tomorrow. Now, to bed with you. There should be some pajamas in there, too. I'm going to go tuck Gilbert in, and I expect you to be in bed by the time I get back."

Argh! Granny pjs?????? Someone is SO going to pay for this!

[V: *Snickers*]

The next morning came sooner than I thought it would. I was having a perfect pleasant dream until this blasted ringing started.

"M-Ma'am... Did you set the a-a-" *Yawn* "Alarm?"

"Yes, I did, otherwise you might have overslept."

"B-but it's five AM. Couldn't I get up at six like a normal sim? Or at seven? Yeah,

seven is a much more agreeable hour."

"No. I told you have to get dressed and make breakfast for Gilbert. Now, hop to. I going for my jog."

"Argh!" *Slam* "Stupid Gilbert, ruining my sleep..."

I got dressed and started on breakfast. Then it suddenly occurred to me that I couldn't cook. Well, I guess I could make my new specialty: Grilled Cheese. Mmm. Who wouldn't want perfectly melted, ooey, gooey, cheesy goodness for breakfast?

I sure did. Cheese is amazing; it makes anything delicious. I could eat it all day, every day. I love cheese. Cheese is good. It's powers are-

KB: AHEM. I think the readers get the point, Dagmar.

Right. So, I made grilled cheese for breakfast. Gilbert and I were having a nice little conversation (He asked me what being a townie was like. Wanted to know if me and the other townie girls shared a room. Perv.), when Denise walked in. She was

livid.

DJ: "WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?"

"W-What are you talking about? I made breakfast. Just like you asked.“

"Oh, really?"

"Y-yes. I made grilled cheese."

"GRILLED CHEESE IS NOT BREAKFAST!"

"W-w-what's wrong with grilled cheese? I-I love grilled cheese. Doesn't everybody? I just t-thought that everyone else might like some grilled cheese, too."

"Oh, really? Well, let me explain something, missy. Grilled cheese is NOT suitable for

breakfast. Lunch, yes. An afternoon snack, maybe. But most certainly not breakfast. Breakfast food includes pancakes, or omelettes, and maybe even crepes. Occasionally, if one is in a hurry, cereal or a pastry would be suitable. But breakfast food, most certainly, does not include GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICHES!"

"Oh." *Gulp* "B-but I don't know how to make any of those things."

"YOU DON'T KNOW HOW TO MAKE CEREAL? WHAT ARE YOU, A COMPLETE IDIOT?"

"N-no ma'am."

"REALLY? BECAUSE YOU CERTAINLY SOUND LIKE ONE!"

"Mother, calm down. It's ok. I didn't mind eating grilled cheese, really. The change was refreshing, actually. Just relax."

"Humph, fine. I will let this slide for now. But in the future, no more grilled cheese for breakfast, understand? You can eat whatever you what for breakfast; I understand your aspiration change makes you crave cheese. But my Gilbert gets a proper

breakfast, you hear?"

"Yes, madam."

"Good. Meet me out in the garden when you've finished cleaning up the kitchen." *Walks away, muttering*: "Grilled cheese for breakfast... What was she thinking? ...Stupid loony."

As per orders, I met Mrs. Jacquet in the garden.

"Right, well, since you've proven to be incompetent with something as simple as making breakfast, I'm going to supervise your chores until you get the hang of

things. And you most certainly will be learning how to cook. Luckily for you, gardening in the sim world is a no-brainer. Though I imagine if anyone could figure out a way to screw things up, it would be you."

"Uh, thanks..."

"Don't thank me, girl! That was an insult! Sheesh, stupid loony can't even tell an insult from a complement. Oh, Plumbbob, how I've got my work cut out for me..."

"Stupid you may be, but I'm determined to turn your block head into something. So we'll start with the gardening. First, you'll tend the trees behind you; trim their branches, spray them with insecticide, and so on. Next, you'll plant tomatoes in the

greenhouse- do it right, or else they won't grow. Then you water 'em, and pull up any weeds you see. And finally, you'll trim the hedges if they've grown too much. I expect you to tend the garden every morning after breakfast, even in winter. It's why we got a greenhouse after all. Any questions?"

"Uh, yes. Um, why don't you just hire a gardener if you don't want to do the work yourself?"

"Humph..."

"Good question... Let me think about that..."

"Because gardeners aren't free, stupid. Now get to work."

"But, come on. You don't really expect me to do all this by myself, do you? It'll take forever! Even you couldn't be so unreasonable. How about we settle on some other arrangement? Like say, I give you money, you just name your price and I'll get it

from CrumpleBottom's criminal funds, and you let me go free, huh? Doesn't that sound like a much more agreeable solution? Then you'd have tons of money and enough to get a gardener and a maid. Or even a whole team of gardeners and maids! Wouldn't that be better, huh? And you wouldn't have to waste your valuable time training anyone, either. You'd-"

"Dagmar..."

"Yess..."

"MOVE IT!"

*Sigh* "Yes, ma'am."

"Okay, now we spray the trees to keep the bugs away."

"Couldn't we get ladybugs to do that?"

"Yes, but that costs money, and this way means more work for you and more fun for

me as I watch you suffer."

*Sigh*

"You missed a spot. Do it over, and do it right."

*SIGH*

"Don't give me any sass, young lady."

"I'm not-"

"No back talk, either."

"But-"

"I SAID no back talk!"

*SIGH*

"Now trim those branches... no, no, the tree should look round, not like a triangle... You're doing it all wrong..."

"You could just do it yourself, you know."

"Are you giving me sass?"

*Gulp* "No ma'am."

"I thought so, now hold the shears up, and stand up straight, and be gentle, you don't want to hurt the tree, and-"

*SIGH*

"Now, before we plant, we fertilize the soil to help it grow. We usually make our own, but we don't have any left, so just use the bag. When Fall comes, you'll rake the leaves and we'll use them as compost for our fertilizer... Wait, now, you don't want to

put too much... no, now that's too little-"

"Make up your mind, lady!"

"ARE YOU GIVING ME SASS? BECAUSE I COULD USE YOU FOR FERTILIZER INSTEAD!"

*Whisper*: "No ma'am..."

"GOOD! Now, spread the fertilizer evenly... I SAID EVENLY, YOU DOLT, NOT A LUMPY

MESS OF CRAP!"

"Now that you've learned the proper way to fertilize the soil, it's time to plant the seeds. Dig a hole... Too shallow, you need to put it far enough down so that birds or other animals don't dig it up."

"We're in a greenhouse."

"THAT IS BESIDES THE POINT! NOW DIG THE HOLE! ...Good, now cover it... Now, place the next one. I want a neat garden, so place each seed an equal length apart... No, too far over, a little to the left... Too much, back to the right... Too far again, left... Noo, too much, go right... Oh, come on, put it in the middle, you dolt!"

"And now that you've learned the proper way to plant a garden, it's time to water

the plants. Now it's very important to give the plants just the right amount of water. Now, I could install a sprinkler system-"

"But that costs money and you have fun watching me suffer, right?"

"Oh, good, you're learning! Now as I was saying, too much water and the plants will get droopy; to little water and the plants will wilt. That's it... STOP! Too much, too much... Okay, next one... A little more, don't be stingy! ...STOP! THAT'S WAY TOO

MUCH GIRL! Next... A little more... a little more... STOP!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING, YOU BLOCK HEAD?"

And that's how it went for the WHOLE morning.

*Whine*: "Are we done yet? Please, please tell me we're done."

"Humph, we barely got started; there's loads more work to do. And you haven't even started the laundry yet."

"But I'm hungry and I got to pee. Pleeease? Pretty, pretty, please, can we stop?

"Well, okay. it's almost lunch time anyway. Wash up and then we'll start your cooking lessons."

"Now, lunchtime is the proper time to make sandwiches. I have nothing against sandwiches, if, of course, they are served for lunch; some of them can even be quite fancy and delicious. Today, though, we'll stick to the basic baloney sandwich.

Now-"

While I was getting lectured on the art of the "proper" baloney sandwich (Too much mustard... No, too little mustard... Cut the crust off... Too sloppy, do it again... No cut it sideways), Gilbert was relaxing.

It seems he spends most of his day on the couch. Little mama's boy... Yeah, he really works hard... *Rolls Eyes*

"Meanwhile, I was in hell taking orders from the nagging old witch."

"Dagmar, get the groceries!"

"Yes, madam." *Sigh*

"Here you go, that'll be $375."

"I'll make it double if you take me with you."

"Wha?"

"You got to help me. I have to get outta here. I'll do anything, just take me with you."

"Um, that's... uh, nice, lady, but, uh, I'm going to go now..."

"No! Don't leave me!"

"Know what? Keep your money; I'm just going to go." *Runs to truck*

"NOO! TAKE ME WITH YOU!" *Runs after delivery lady*

Well, Mrs. Jacquet caught me trying to run away. Looks like I'm stuck here for now. *Sigh* At least I have cheese.

"So how was your morning, ladies?"

"Aw, Gilbert, thank you for asking; you're such a sweet boy. Our morning was perfectly pleasant, dear. Although, we did run into a few difficulties, teaching Dagmar the proper way to garden. What about you, sweetie? Did you get a chance

to look over the bakery's accounts?"

"Not yet, mother. I'll get started on it right after lunch."

"Pleasant?! You call this morning pleasant?! This place is a prison!"

"For you and me both, Dagmar. For you and me both."

"WHAT WAS THAT?"

D&G: "Nothing!"

Gilbert may have thought that this place was a prison, too, but he still didn't have to do any chores. No, it was I who cleaned up the kitchen... Cleaned up the whole house for that matter.

And I took out the trash... Man would I have liked to stuff Denise in there...

"WHAT WAS THAT?"

"Nothing, Mrs. Jacquet."

That woman had an uncanny ability to read minds. But anyway, just when I thought I was done for the day, Denise announced that it was time for lessons. As if she hadn't been giving me lessons all morning!

"DAGMAR!"

"Coming, Mrs. Jacquet, I'm coming."

First was the sewing lessons.

"In my day, every young lady could sew. Wasn't proper if you didn't know how. By the time I was ten, I was in charge of the mending for the whole house, so that my

mama, Plumbbob rest her soul, could have some time to relax every now and then. It wasn't easy running a household in those days... Nowadays, everyone has it so easy; they hire a maid and a gardener and a nanny... They even go to the store and buy their clothes. Why, I'll have you know I made my whole wedding trousseau. Back then, people couldn't afford to just go to the store and buy a whole new wardrobe.”

“But look at you! You can't even sew a button! I swear, young girls' heads these days are full of nothing but fluff!"

*Sigh* I'm starting to think she exaggerating. I know she's old, but come on? Sewing

a whole wardrobe? Unbelievable.

"What was that?"

"Nothing, madam, nothing."

"Yeah, it better be nothing. And sew that one over! Can't you see that button's crooked?"

After the sewing came the dance lessons, because:

"In my day, every young lady knew how to dance. Girls with two left feet didn't get married! Dancing is very important; it teaches you to be graceful and balanced,

and to not make a fool of yourself on the dance floor. Now, how are you supposed to learn grace and balance with that posture? Straighten your back! ...Arms up... Higher! Straighten that arm! A straight arm is the difference between a swan and a duck! ...And for goodness sakes, straighten those knees!"

And then came my lowest point of the day. I got fat. Humph, must have been all the cheese...

"And dancing's supposed to help you lose weight, but somehow you've managed

to screw that up, too. Never in all my years have I seen or heard of someone who gained weight after working out! Look at you! You're as big as a house!"

GRR. I loathe that woman. And what was Gilbert doing during all this, do you wonder? Working, perhaps? Oh, no.

He was in front of his mirror. Seducing his own reflection. I however, still had work to do. Oh, yes, that's right, more work.

"Dance lessons are over for today; don't worry, though. Keep it up and you'll get your old figure back in no time. Unless you want to stay that way; your prerogative. But you can decide that later, back to the garden."

"Are you serious? I gardened all morning!"

"And now it's late afternoon and there's weeding and watering to be done. So, move it."

And that's how I ended up gardening at night: watering...

...and weeding...

"No, no, no! Not that, you ninny, that's the plant! Pull up the weeds, the weeds, girl!"

And then I had the pleasure of cleaning up the yard... (Stupid Maxis/EA no no pets sign... *Grumble*)

...and trimming the hedges.

When I finally came inside it was 8:30.

"You're late! Dinner is supposed to be at seven! Poor Gilbert is starving! Hurry up and make dinner and wash up so we can eat. I don't expect you to be so tardy in the

future! You better finish your chores on time, or-"

"Or what? You'll send me to bed without supper?"

"No. I'll get out my simvac."

*Gulp*

*Grumble* It's not like she couldn't have made dinner...

"WHAT WAS THAT?"

"Nothing, madam, nothing."

"DON'T YOU USE THAT TONE WITH ME!"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Gilbert, dear, I'm so sorry dinner's late, but this ninny over here just can't seem to get her work done."

"Mother, will you stop? I told you that it was okay, and besides, it was her first day and she's not accustomed to hard labor. I'm sure she'll get the hang of it tomorrow."

"Thanks, Gilbert."

"No problem." *Wink*

"Humph, she better get the hang of it! We didn't do any laundry today, or do any baking for the store!"

D&G: *Sigh*

"That's what our employees are for, mother."

"But, it's not the same! Those nincompoops don't know how to do anything! Our customers expect quality, home baked goods!"

"Mother... We've been over this before..."

While those two debated, I cleaned up the kitchen. It was almost 10 o'clock. Bedtime. I couldn't wait! I was dead on my feet, and my body ached for my soft, comfortable bed and pillow. I had almost made it to my room when—

"Dagmar!"

"Argh what, now? I've cooked, cleaned, gardened, sewed, danced, and then cooked, cleaned, and gardened some more. I'm tired, my feet hurt, my back hurts,

and my brain hurts from thinking about cheese all frickin'-frackin' day. So, What, huh? What could you possibly have left for me to do that I didn't already do, huh? What next? Music lessons? Every girl needs to learn how to play an instrument? Or ironing? You want me to iron Gilbert's precious clothes for tomorrow? Or perhaps you want me to get started on tomorrow's work and do more cooking and sewing? What is it, huh? WHAT?"

"Humph, my mother died when I was young, and my father put me in charge of the household and my three younger siblings since I was half your age. You think your day was hard? I did double your amount of work every day since I was a teen. Stop

being such a whiney baby. ...I swear, young people nowadays have no work ethic... And anyway, I wanted you to pour me a glass of nectar. It's been a rough day."

She had a rough day? She had a rough day?!

"You know what? Pour yourself a glass, too. You look like you need it. Last thing I need is a maid with a nervous breakdown."

"Thanks, Mrs. Jacquet; That's very generous of you."

"Huh, well don't expect it all the time. And I count my bottles, so don’t be sneaking in my cabinet, either."

"Yes, ma'am."

Pretty soon, though, I was yawning into my glass. Although, that also might have had to do with Mrs. Jacquet's stories of 'when she was young'.

"Good Plumbbob, girl! You're falling asleep standing up! Go to bed already!"

"Yes, madam. 'Night."

*Mutters*: "Pfft, youngins'... Can't stay up past ten..."

I went and got ready for bed.

"I will get through this," I told my reflection, "I just have to think of a plan. Not cheese. A plan... b-but right now... r-right ...now" *Yawn* "I need some s-sleep..."

Exhausted, I got into bed. Always a night owl, I never thought I'd be so happy to go to bed before 10 PM, but I quickly drifted off to sleep, worn out after my first day.

V: "BUUURRP. Oopsie! Excuse me."

D: "Enjoying yourself, Veronica?"

V: Yes, I am, thank you. And I would love to stay and read more of your story, but-"

*Yawn* "I'm getting sleepy... But this really was a good bedtime story, though. I'll finish reading about your torture some other time." *Goes to bed*

D: Poor Veronica, she should have kept reading. Because this story isn't done yet, there's more, much more...

A few weeks later, I had adjusted to my new life and my new routine of chores. In fact, I was progressing so well, Mrs. Jacquet no longer felt the need to supervise my chores and bark orders over my shoulder every minute. Then, one day, as I was

cleaning up the kitchen, it happened. A miracle.

"Hey, Dagmar, can you tell my mother I'm going to check up on the bakery today? And tell her not to worry that I skipped breakfast; I'll pick something up."

"Meh... Sure, Whatever."

"Thanks." *Leaves*

"Dagmar!"

"What?"

"I'm going for a jog, I should be back in an hour. Don't forget to wake Gilbert up for

breakfast."

"Wait, Mrs. Jacquet-"

"What?"

I hesitated.

"Well, what is it?"

"Um, ..um, nothing, nothing, just that, uh, um, ...the ...the... groceries! Yeah! We're,

uh, almost out of groceries."

"Well, okay... order some more." *Leaves*

I couldn't believe it! An hour of freedom! It wasn't long enough to escape. I'd need more than an hour to make it safely downtown and any of the neighbors could spot me leaving and Mrs. Jacquet would just haul me back here once she found out.

Then she'd think of some other punishment for me. No, I couldn't escape... But, I could make a call for help. I dashed to the phone and called my mentor.

"CrumpleBottom? CrumpleBottom, is that you? Oh, thank Plumbbob I got through!"

[Okay, sorry folks, but CrumpleButt here would not cooperate and pick up a phone. GRR, stupid NPC glitches. So, you'll just have to use your imagination and pretend a phone is in her hand, ...or pretend she's using a video phone. Your choice.]

"I trust that there's a reason you're calling me at this ungodly hour, Dagmar? You know I don't get up before 10 AM."

"Yes, I need your help. I've been kidnapped."

"Really? Since when?"

"CrumpleBottom... It's been at least six weeks now."

"Humph, well, I didn't notice."

"How could you not notice? I'm your top agent! All this time, I've been slaving away,

as a personal live-in maid, and you haven't even noticed that your most loyal, trusted agent has been missing for a month and a half?"

"Well, you know... There was knitting to be done... And, of course, people to slap, young lovers to harass. I was busy."

"CrumpleBottom! Look, just send some agents over to get me out of here, and tell them to be discreet. I'm at the Jacquet residence in Bluewater-“

"Wait a minute, Jacquet? Denise Jacquet?"

"Yes, she-"

"Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no. I sorry Dagmar, but you'll have to get yourself out of there. I used to go to school with her. Use to torment me every day, she did, her and that Olive. Tried to steal my boyfriend, too! Why, that Olive... told me she was letting

me have him... letting me have him, humph! ...And then she had the nerve to threaten me ...said if I ever crossed her or Denise, I'd better watch out and I could kiss my Grimy goodbye. ...As if she could get the Grim back just like that... Could she get the Grim back just like that?..."

"WELL, I'M NOT GOING TO RISK IT. SETTLE THIS YOURSELF; I WANT NO PART OF THIS, ABSOLUTELY, NONE YOU HEAR? NO ONE TAKES MY GRIMY AWAY FROM ME! NO ONE!!!" *CrumpleBottom, to herself*: Oh, I need a drink... Gotta calm my nerves..."

"Calm down, CrumpleBottom, I understand you're upset; there's no need to shout. But, how am I supposed to get out of here without your help?"

"That is none of my concern. In fact, I shouldn't even be talking to you, Denise might get word back to Olive, so I really got to go-"

"Wait, wait, CrumpleBottom, what about Consort? Weren't you going after him?

How-"

"SHHH! No, of course I don't like Consort! DON'T LISTEN TO HER, GRIMY! How could you say such a thing, Dagmar? Consort is chopped liver next to the Grim, AND I WOULD NEVER, EVER LEAVE MY GRIMY FOR THAT SCUM! YOU HERE THAT, GRIMY? I've

got to go-"

"WAIT! You're really just going to leave me high and dry? After everything I've done for you, after all the times I've supported you, kept you safe in the Townie Rebellion?"

"Um, yes. Comes with the job; you knew the risks, right? Don't worry, I won't let your sacrifice go in vain, I'll get you a plaque or something." *Click*

"But I don't want a plaque! I want to escape! Hello? HELLO? CRUMPLEBOTTOM?!"

I tried calling her back, but she wouldn't answer. Then Mrs. Jacquet came back and after I told her where Gilbert had gone, it was back to work.

The Jacquets never did find out that I tricked them, but I was worried, nonetheless. I always thought that CrumpleBottom was looking for me, that she'd send some agents to come rescue me. But it seems Denise was right; CrumpleBottom really is

afraid of her and Olive Specter. Now my only chance of escape is gone. ...Or is it? I guess I still had some of the brains of a knowledge sim because it wasn't long before I thought of a Plan B. This time, though, I would only rely on myself. No more trusting people. This plan was brilliant, flawless even, although a trifle complicated and time consuming. But then I had nothing but time on my hands, plus the longer I stayed, the more the Jacquets would trust me and the more freedom I would gain.

I decided to put phase one of my plan into action that night, after Denise had gone to sleep.

The cranky old witch was dead asleep as I crept out of bed and over to the vanity.

She didn't even stir as the lights went on. Pfft. Old People. What can you expect? Anyway, I did what I could to make myself presentable. Using Mrs. Jacquet's limited supply of makeup, and a decent little blue dress I found in Mrs. Jacquet's equally

limited wardrobe earlier that night, I got myself ready. Because tonight was Operation: Seduce Gilbert. It shouldn't be too hard, I am a woman, and Gilbert is romance. He'll do anything for woohoo. And once I have that twit wrapped around my fingers, it'll be easy to get the heck out of here and win back Veronica.

I snuck out of the room and turned off the light quietly, lest I disturb Mrs. Jacquet. Then I made my way upstairs to Gilbert's room. The old fool was exactly where I'd thought he'd be: in front of the mirror.

Gilbert couldn't believe what he was seeing in the mirror. A gorgeous woman in a short blue floral dress that hugged her curves had appeared in his mirror, while he was practicing his 'moves'. It was just like some fantasy romance novel. Wait, he

thought to himself, She looks familiar... Gilbert whirled around.

"D-Dagmar? Is that you?" he asked in disbelief.

"Hello, Gilbert."

*****

And THAT's where I'm ending it. Evil, I know. So. Wondering what Dagmar's gonna do? What about Gilbert, what's he gonna do? Will he betray Veronica's trust? And speaking of Veronica, what's she gonna do if she finds out what Dagmar's up to? But will she ever find out? Answers to those questions and more are waiting in the next chapter. Later, simmers & happy reading.