FEATURESTORY

THE BIG SEARCH! H o w C h o o s i n g a C o l l e g e Major a > I B I B B

c a n b e a s D a u n t i n g a s G e t t i n g t h e D e g r e e

By Heather McLean lA/iederhoeft

In 1978,1 stumbled upon an interest in my life that I'm sure my parents never would have thought would attract me. It was that year that I discovered the Houston Oilers and in a relatively short time, I became an ardent fan. I never missed watching a game from seventh grade through college and I even wrote a high school term paper on the Oilers' legendary coach Bum Phillips.

My passion for the Oilers also gave me my first long-lived career ambition - to be a broadcaster for Oilers games. In my "Luv ya Blue" state of mind, I couldn't imagine a better job.

That dream faded somewhere along the way (well before the Oilers became the Tennessee Titans). There still are few things I enjoy more than an afternoon of Texas Longhorn football but i t i n no way ties into my professional life. A n d I never majored in broadcast journalism. I started my college experience in the U T School of Business but after three semesters of economics, data processing and accounting, I knew I had to find another major. Two years later, I graduated wi th a bachelor of journalism degree that I only looked into after a cousin suggested I give i t a try because I enjoyed writing letters. I n hindsight, it seems like an odd reason to choose a major but i t actually worked out.

This month, thousands of excited, anxious college freshman are packing their boxes and moving on to study an area that they hope wi l l lead to a successful, satisfying career. Another group of teens - high school seniors - is sending off college applications, often having to de­clare a major that may shape the rest of their lives.

A n d then there's a third group which probably has given as much thought to college majors and careers as the college freshmen and high school seniors - their parents. Having a child choose a university and find her or his career can be as tumultuous a task for a parent as it is for the child. What role can - or should - parents play in this decision? What have they learned along the way that can make the choice a bit easier for their child?

L e a r n i n g f r o m t h e i r o w n e x p e r i e n c e s How many people made a decision at 18 on their career ambition

and still have that same goal 15, 20 or 30 years later? Or has that career ambition developed into more of a passion wi th the passing of time?

According to The Decade after High School: A Parent's Guide, "Sixty percent of post-secondary students graduate from a different program than the one they started i n , " so change should not be unexpected or feared by parents when they receive a text or phone call of a new col­lege path.

" I had a really hard time deciding what to do and I changed my mind a lot. Considering what you want to do for the 'rest of your life' is a daunting thought process," explained Shae Horak, a fourth-grade teacher and freelance graphic designer. " I went into accounting origi­nally because I was trying to please my mom as she wanted me to do something that guaranteed a comfortable salary. Accounting was bor­ing, not for me. I knew i t would pay off in the end, but I didn't want to be stuck. W h e n I switched, my M o m supported me but I did all the pa­perwork to make the switch. I even researched schools to find a graphic design college and ended up moving from Sam Houston to Texas State

because i t has a much better program." For Marilyn Othon, a high school T V and computer teacher, coming

around to following her passion took a few tries. " I went to college three times," she said. "First for marketing as I was convinced i t would make me money but I hated i t . The second time I tried f i lm/TV and loved i t . I worked in the fi lm industry for four years in California and did contract work when I came back to Texas. The third time I went to school, I focused on teaching and am now teaching T V production. I found a job that wasn't in my dream category when I was young and made i t into my dream! I still get to work in the f i lm/TV industry, just in a different manner. You have to fulfill your life, no one or thing can do i t for you."

Parents also should keep in mind that college is, sometimes, a child's

Having a child choose a university and find her or his career can be

as tumultuous a task for a parent as it is for the child. What

role can - or should - parents play in this decision?

first independent opportunity to investigate careers or fields that she or he may never have considered. For Duncan McLean, a graduate of Duke University wi th a double major in English and economics, his university experience led him to his career. "When I was at Duke, I was heavily involved in the student-run arts scene," he explained. " I pro­grammed six film series for the University community, produced shows for the University cable T V station and directed 16mm films and taught filmmaking workshops when I was a senior. I t really was like a third major to me." After graduation, he took some time off and then applied to the University of Southern California School of Cinema-Television, earned an M F A and has been working in the fi lm industry ever since. " I have tried to move forward i n this crazy business the best way I can, in fits and starts, perhaps, but making progress," said McLean while on location in Peru working on a documentary. "Not doing the exact thing I thought I would be when I first set foot on the USC campus, but close enough."

Kathy Reynolds Cloyd, a marketing specialist and writer, felt she just didn't know what to ask when she was trying to decide on a career as her high school days ended. " I th ink the breakdown happens way before the end of high school," she said. " I truly believe there is a gap i n our middle schools and high schools, by that I mean we don't educate kids about what is even out there career-wise. There are careers I had no idea even existed unt i l I was well out of school and already working that I think I might have enjoyed."

W h a t ' s a p a r e n t to d o ? For almost a child's entire life, she or he has heard a parent's opin­

ions, warnings or rules. Grades, friends, clothes, music, attitudes, hob­bies, ambitions—the list is endless. There are so many times that as a parent shares his thoughts or opinions, she or he is greeted by a blank stare that says, " I ' m not hearing a word you are saying."

W h e n i t comes to talking about college, majors and careers, parents need to be aware of how they are communicating. According to The

Decade After High School, " I n a survey of 7,000 senior high school students among Alberta, Canada, 75

percent cited parents as

being in the top three people they were most comfortable asking for ca­reer planning assistance, compared w i t h friends at 43 percent, experts i n the field at 42 percent and counselors at 36 percent."

Even though this research shows that children are interested i n speaking to their parents about college, it's the tone of those conversa­tions that leave many children wanting. " I always had my sights set on a degree that would end i n a career and since I was very good at sci­ence and math, engineering was a given," remembered Diane Callow,

an engineer w i t h Sandia National Laboratories i n Albuquerque. " I n my house, i t wasn't 'what are you going to major in?' i t was 'what k ind of engineering are you going to major in?' That ended up being just fine as engineering suits me. But looking back, I do wish I had been given the freedom and encouraged to look around a little more. I had wanted to get a double major engineeringAiberal arts degree, a five-year honors program at the University of Texas. M y parents said, 'Fine, how are you going to pay for that f i f th year?' I think they should have been a little more open to that idea. I mean, a double degree; how could that be a bad thing? I n the end, there was no real 'open talking' unless i t was the pros and cons of various engineering majors!"

For international business owner Randa Becker, laughter was what greeted her when she told her father and brother of her decision to go into meeting planning. " I fell into meeting planning after working i n a hotel ," said Becker, owner of R-Events. "Both my dad and brother were not happy that I wasn't an engineer like them. They both laughed and asked, 'What? Is that a real job?' But I've had the last laugh, as I've been very successful, both when I worked for others and since I started my own business. I know I 'm one lucky girl but I do work for i t , typically 14-16 hours a day. Luckily, I have fun almost every day!"

A n anything-but-positive attitude from a parent can squelch any fur­ther conversations about majors and careers. The Resilience Research Centre encourages parents to think of themselves as career coaches. Avoid yes or no questions, stay away from leading questions and don't be afraid to ask a child to clarify an answer.

Being a successful parent career coach does take some planning on the parent's part. I n their book Career Coaching Your Kids: Guiding Your Child through the Process of Career Discovery, David H . Montross, Theresa Kane and Robert Ginn Jr. describe four roles parents should take on when working w i t h their child on career decisions. Parents can be a clarifier who supports a child's interest and provides a comfort­able environment for discussion; a connector who helps a child gather information but leaves the analysis of the information to the child; a challenger who talks without lecturing and monitors career exploration without being too pushy; and a motivator who encourages the child i n her or his expectations.

" M y son just finished his second year of college and I feel I can sup­port the career he sets his mind on, w i t h a few caveats," said Dawn Dorsey, a freelance writer. " I want h i m to be happy and to pursue some­thing because i t is his passion, not because he thinks i t would mean a lot of money or someone else says it's cool. Since we are paying for his education, I definitely talk about the pros and cons but, hopefully, i n a

calm, logical manner looking at all angles. The final decision is his, but I want to be sure he has as much information as possible."

Angela Young, an employee communications manager with Continental Airlines and the mother of a college sophomore, has found a way to speak her mind without alienating her daughter. "Although my daughter seems happy majoring in psychology at UT, I'm concerned about the fact that she will need a master's degree in her field to have any earning potential," explained Young. "I've encouraged her to minor in education and get a teaching certification while she's in college. I realize education is not a career she would want to pursue for a lifetime, but she could teach while she works on her master's degree. Or she might even discover she likes teaching."

Reality bites Earning a four-year degree is not only almost a necessity for careers

in the 21 s t century but it also can be an extraordinarily expensive un­dertaking. Ensuring that students have a grasp on the reality of the cost of college is imperative. According to the Project on Student Debt, nearly two-thirds of students at four-year colleges and universities have stu­dent loan debt.

While encouraging a child to major in an area because of earning potential is never recommended, explaining the long-term implica­tions of college debt is a responsibility parents must take seriously. Mark Kantrowitz, publisher of the FinAid and EduPASS Web sites, recom­mends that students do not borrow more money than they expect to make in their first year of employment. For example, if a student is considering a career that averages a $40,000 annual salary, she or he should not borrow more than $10,000 per year. Kantrowitz explained that, on average, it would take 10 years to pay off this debt at the start­ing salary range. By just increasing the amount borrowed to 1.5 times the expected starting salary, the student most likely will have college loan debt for 20 years.

Long before embarking on the college journey, parents not only have to put some serious thought into if and what they can afford to pay for but explaining to their child what they will be responsible for whether it is through scholarship, grants, loans and/or working. There also is the question of financial support after college. While no one can predict the future of the economy, parents should be able to tell their child even before the decision is made of where to go to college if and for how long financial support will continue after school. For some parents, once the degree is in hand, financial responsibility completely transfers

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to the young adult while others may allow the graduate to return home or help w i t h some expenses. Parents need to be as upfront as possible about financial help after college as this may weigh into the decision of what school to attend.

Another tough call relates to how to handle i t if a child receives a scholarship to a school or i n a field they no longer are interested i n . "One of my children is currently i n ROTC, winning national awards for her work i n that program but she has no desire to take a full R O T C scholarship to go to school as she now has decided that the military is not the direction she wants to go i n , " explains Kara Koller, a high school music teacher. "We really have no money for college, due to my divorce, so naturally, any scholarship would be a blessing. But I support her for knowing that she doesn't want to go that way and wi l l help in any way to make sure she gets to where she wants to be. I cannot steer my kids away from their dreams, as I wouldn't be able to live w i t h them second-guessing their choices later on i n life. But I also know that once college is over, they are on their own financially. I f they can't make it , they can stay w i t h me, but they'll have to get any job to help w i t h expenses."

A n d t h e d e c i s i o n i s . . . Perhaps the most important thing that parents should keep in mind as

they agonize over SAT scores, college applications, scholarships, loans, changing majors and, eventually, finding that first full-time "real" job is that a person's work is just one element of who they are. " I th ink you can enjoy your life even if your job isn't your dream or passion," said Tony

Napolillo, marketing manager for Green Mountain Energy. "I've had really boring jobs i n the past but loved my life outside of work. That said, I really couldn't be hap­pier i n my marketing career today as I am now as I be­lieve my company is making a difference and i f I do my job right, I ' l l end up saving the world. It's the first time i n my

career where I've had a passion about the product I 'm marketing!" Having a healthy outlook on life and being able to communicate

our thoughts on the role a career plays i n i t also can make the road to career choice a little less stressful for both parent and child. "A job does not and should not have to bring happiness but a satisfaction i n self and abilities," said Carol Tobola, an accountant by degree and the mother of twin high school sophomores. "Happiness comes from w i t h i n an i n ­dividual. Life dictates lots of choices and how we respond to choices dictates our futures. As for careers, in my generation, growing up meant getting a good job to support your family. For my children, I want i t to be growing into a responsible citizen of the world, believing that one person can and does make a difference." B

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