Family Communication

What is a Family?

"There is no right way to be a family.”

•Kathleen Galvin

The Family is a System!

• Virginia Satir

Communication is Transactional

•A continuous, ever-changing process•We do not relate to each other We relate to a mental

picture we create in our heads of each otherThese pictures are negotiated over time.

Families Develop Over Time

Couple

Family with Young Children

Family with School Age Children

Family with Teenagers

Family Launching

Empty Nest

A Family has Two Primary Communication Functions

Cohesion–How tightly or loosely knit

Adaptability

–How to handle change? How to assign roles?

Disengaged

Enmeshed

Chaotic

Rigid

Empty Nest

Family with Young Children

Family with School Aged Children

Family with Teenagers

Family Launching

Couple

Couple

Cohesion

Adaptability

Family with Young ChildrenFamily with School Aged ChildrenEmpty NestFamily with TeenagersFamily Launching

Family ImagesVisual metaphors that describe

familiesRock Band Jet Fighters

Corporation Classroom

Zoo Nest

Circus Others?

Disengaged

Enmeshed

Chaotic

Rigid

Nest

Jet Fighters

Corporation

Circus

Classroom

Rock Band

Rock BandJet FightersCorporationNestCircusClassroom

Family Themes:

• Mottos that define who we are– "Smiths don't quit!"– "Jones stick together." – "Franklins always come out on top."

Biosocial Issues

• What does it mean to be male or female in this family?

• How are sex roles defined?• How are gender and power

linked?

Rules and Patterns

• Who talks to whom about what, when and how?

• What does NOT get talked about• How do you talk (i.e. euphemisms,

whispers)• Meta-rules

– Rules about rules– How do we address or change the

rules?

Boundaries

• Rigid?• Permeable• None• Immigrant family• Highly religious family